TTFN

by Jennifer White

 

Dear Readers,

I wanted to let you all know that I will be taking a sabbatical for a while, to take a break from writing. I am not happy with something I write, if I feel that I am repeating myself. I need to recharge my creative batteries, so when I start to write again, it will be fresh and new.

I also wanted to thank you all for your support and comments, especially the constructive ones. You can't make everyone happy; you have to write for yourself, and hope for the best.

As a coda (until I return), I thought I'd shift gears a little, and answer a question I've been emailed: how can a man get his wife to feminize him?

First: no two women are exactly alike, so no matter what anyone says, there is no surefire way that always works. But I do have some ideas and some things which might be helpful for you.

 

 

Who Is *She*?

What kind of woman exactly are you with? This makes a big difference in your approach. Where does she fall n terms of her forcefulness? If she is very strong and dominating, you might already be her submissive. In this case, you just need to make her think that by making you dress up, she can control you even better. But you need to make sure she thinks it *her* idea. Most dommes don't want you to tell them what to do!

Or is she a very timid woman? In this case, she probably does whatever you tell her to already. And in this case, you've got no problem; just tell her to do it!

But in reality, most women will fall in between these two extremes, so you'll need another approach.

 

How about her willingness to experiment in bed? You could have the extreme of a woman who is pretty wild, and will try almost anything. Tell her you want to dress up, then make love, and she'll go for it.

But if she is the kind that is very shy about sex, with little or no adventurousness, then it will be a lot more difficult for you. And as with her forcefulness, most women fall somewhere in between the two extremes.

 

 

Who Are *You*?

You need to be very honest with yourself before you consider how to proceed. What are you doing this for? What are you trying to get out of it? You need to ask yourself the hardest question possible: do you want to be a woman because it is exciting and arousing for, or do you want to be a woman because what you *really* want is to be with a man?

If you want to be feminized by your wife, so that you can start dating a man, then you really need to sit down with your wife and have a long talk. Let's say you could get her to do what you want. She would then lose you. Not a lot of women want to lose their husbands to another woman, let alone to a man.

If this is you, stop now, tell your wife how you really feel, and consider going to get therapy together. Is that too hard for you to do? Then just forget about asking her to feminize you. You will really hurt her in the end if you aren't totally honest with her, and hurting your wife is the worst thing you could do.

 

If you want to be feminized, because it is wonderful and exciting for you, and a fantasy you've had all your life (or just found that you have), then it is safe to proceed. But you have to be willing to dig down deep, and do some things yourself. It won't be all her. You need to be willing to grow as a person, make sacrifices, and allow yourself to bend to *her* will. You will have to do things you *don't* want to do. You will have to give up certain things, allowing *her* to take over parts of your life you never intended. If you really want her to make you into a woman, the key is going to be *you*. What are you willing to do in order to reach your feminine goals?

 

So now what you need to figure out is....

How Do I Ask Her?

Well, if you've got the close loving relationship that all women dream of having with their husbands, then you could just come out and *ask* her. But unfortunately, we don't all have that, so you need to figure out a few things.

First, you must know your woman, and you must know her monthly cycle. Some women have PMS and get *really* grumpy. Some get migraines. Most get bloated, have cramps, and more. Um, if you haven't figured it out now, this is not the time to ask her! Don't let bad timing kill your effort before you start! If she is wearing a tampon, and you ask her to turn you into a woman, well, lets just say your odds are not good, and she will laugh at you for even thinking of wanting to be one.

Remember how I just mentioned how a woman would hate losing her husband to another woman (or a man)? When you finally tell her, you need to be absolutely sure that she understands that this is something you are doing to cement your relationship to her, to bring the two of you closer together.

Secondly, the more straight-laced that she is, the more shocking it may seem to her. If she grew up in San Francisco, it might bring a yawn. But if she's from a farm in North Dakota, well, then you've got more work to do. It is very likely that her first reaction is going to be a certain thought: he's gay. You need to be very certain that she doesn't think this, or else you might lose her right off the bat.

To avoid this shock factor, a wise first move would be to suggest something a little easier for her to digest, and *then* move towards your true fantasy. Why not start out with some good old-fashioned fem dom?

Tell her you love her with all your heart. Tell her that you worship her, adore her, and she is like god to you. Admit that you do a lot of terrible things, like neglecting her feelings, not listening to her, not always appreciate all that she does for you, and whatever other little things that men forget to do after they get married.

Then tell her that you want to start doing something in the bedroom, to make up for it. What you need to play upon, is that deep inside, every woman believes something, which just doesn't work out in real life: women believe we can change a man after marriage, correct his flaws, fix him up, and make him just right. In reality, men resist every little thing you do to try and help them. They resent it, feel upset and controlled, and they just don't change.

You need to let her know, that what you are proposing is going to be something very beneficial for her. She will be in total control. You will do whatever she tells you, however she tells you, without complaint. You can express your love for her by serving her, and that she can make you into exactly what she wants.

 

Now after a while of being her total devoted loving slave, she will have to be pleased at how the relationship is going. It might take some time for her to get used to being in charge, but if you can get her into this, you're in great shape. She's getting used to controlling you, and you're getting used to letting her dominate you.

In a typical scenario, the domination will be just in the bedroom at first, but you want to encourage her to spread it into the scope of your entire lives together. But don't rush this if she isn't ready for it! Don't blow it be going to fast. Make sure she's comfortable before you move on.

Lets say that she is doing great at dominating you in bed, and you are doing your part by being submissive. Even in normal life, you're listening to her, doing what she asks, and your relationship is better than it has ever been. This will make her willing to keep things moving forward.

 

 

From Dom to Femme

Now how do you get things to move from simple domination in bed, to something more, involving your feminization? Simple. Start with panties.

Tell her that being hers really turns you on, and you want to do something to show her that you are hers, always. Suggest to her that if she made you wear an old pair of her panties, then it would be a constant reminder of her position of power over you. They would symbolize how her feminine power has consumed yours, and how you belong completely to her.

It is important that you ask her, so that *she* gives the order. You want her to get used to ordering you to wear her things. And if you do it right, she'll follow your suggestion, and put you into panties.

Now here is the most important things: once she does this, you have to be willing to suck it up, and truly give yourself 100% over to her. Start doing the housework, without being asked. Start giving her control of all the decisions (what movie to go to, what restaurant to eat at, even what you should order). Some women might not like this, and might want a man who thinks for himself, and makes his own decisions, so go carefully, to gauge her reactions. But if she likes it, keep it up.

But you can also do other things that she will love. Lets say she has a couple of friends you can't stand. Tell her "Gee honey, we should do things with Betty and Bob more often." Start turning down the chance to do things with your friends, making sure she hears you. When she's in the room with you, if you were to tell your friends something like "Sorry, I can't go out with you guys to the bar tonight, I want to go shopping with my wife". Note the word *want*. You have given yourself over to her desires, right? So what she wants, you want. Tell her that it would be nice if her mother stayed with you for the weekend, instead of spending money to stay at a hotel. You get the idea.

If she likes redecorating, suggest that you help her redo a room in hour house. If she likes gardening, suggest that you help her put in a new flower bed. Do the shopping with her. Give your input when asked, but don't ever complain about the price, or tell her that you don't like something she picked. You are just a submissive, and she is your woman, so she is right in all things, at all times.

You know what things about you she has been wanting to change. Give in. Do her bidding. Start to become what she wants you to become.

 

If you do all these things, and do them correctly, she ought to be able to make an inference on her own: putting him into panties made him become more of the man I had always wanted him to be. Now what if I go further with it?

If all goes well, she might pick up on it from there, and start feminizing you more and more. But depending on her personality, you might need to keep pushing things.

 

 

What Next?

If things are stuck with you wearing just panties, and you want to keep it moving forward, you will need to take some further action. There are a couple of approaches here that you can try, depending on the personality of your wife.

One: you could start to back down just a little in your day to day life, and start to resist her. When she questions you on it, tell her that the panties are a wonderful reminder of her dominance, but that you are getting "too used to it", and need to be pushed more. Then next thing you know, bang! You're in a bra too, and well on the way.

Two: keep on serving her at your current level. Beg permission to tell her something. Then tell her that you love how your relationship is doing, and how wearing her panties makes you feel so close to her. Tell her you want to keep growing closer to her, and that if she would make you wear other things of hers, then you would feel even more hers.

If she thinks this is a good idea, and does put you into something else, then you need to redouble your efforts to server her, and do what she wants and needs, all day long. Total commitment to her. You need to give her everything you've got.

 

Either way, you should now be moving things forward, and over time, you can keep going further and further, until she's got you all the way.

 

 

Closing The Deal

Now before you let her totally dominate you, before you started this long hard process, if she walked in, and saw you dressed up in her things, she would have been shocked, upset, angry, and might have walked out on you for good.

But think of the beauty of the situation now. If you're already wearing her bra and panties all the time, and you're already allowing her to totally dominate you, when she comes how to find you doing housework, wearing an old dress of hers (one she doesn't wear anymore, one from the rag box, one she was going to give to Purple Heart...anything but her good stuff that you might stretch out and ruin!!!). When she finds you like this, she might not be happy, but it won't come as a complete surprise.

Now you can tell her that you worship and adore her so much, that you want to be like her. Tell her that you want for her to make you become an extension of her, that you want for her to make you become just like her, so you can better serve you. If you can convince her of something along these lines, then you are done, and you've reached your goal.

Just remember that she owns you now, and you are completely hers. She will make you do things you don't like doing. For example, most men seem to hate going down on their women, even though it is something that most women (at least the ones who have tried it!) really love. Don't like how she tastes? Sorry, you need to get used to it, if it is something she makes you do. By the way, if you get stuck and need to move things forward, you can tell her how much you worship her, and how you want to express your feelings towards her by giving her oral sex. She'll fall in love with it, and soon your face will be between her legs all the time. But that also means that soon you'll be in skirts and heels while you're doing it. A true win-win situation, if one ever existed....

* * *

 

Other Ideas

 

Here are some other ideas which may or may not work, depending on her personality, if the above scenario is not for you. I don't know your wife, so I can't tell you which of these may work, and which will get your face slapped. All I can say is: you know her, you need to figure some things out on your own. But here's some things, which might be worth a shot:

 

-Let her catch you dressing up. There is a big danger here of course of the shock factor, so this will only work if she pretty much already suspects you, and she is the type not to get upset. A variation on this is to let her find the stories you like to read on-line.

 

-Tell her that her sexy clothes really turn you on, and that you've always had a fantasy of being dressed up in things like hers, then making love to her. This might work for the adventurous type, but you could scare off some women too.

 

-Tell her you want to understand how it feels to be her, and suggest that you dress up as her, and that she can help you to understand her life better. In bed, tell her to do to you, what she wants you to do to her. Then tell her it was the most incredible thing you ever felt, and you want to do it more often, for special occasions.

 

-A variation on this is to go to a Halloween costume party, and convince her that you should go as each other (or bride/groom, in reverse). Somehow make her think that it was her idea, and you're all set. Then when you get back, make passionate love to her, and tell her what a turn-on it was.

 

-Tell her that when you were younger, your sister dressed you up as a girl once (or your cousin, etc., if you don't have a sister). Tell her that you can't explain it, but you got so turned on by it, that you've thought of it from time to time ever since, and ask her if she'd be willing to try with you.

 

-Rent or watch a movie with a feminization theme, like The Hot Chick, Tootsie, or whatever. Gauge her reaction. Show her how turned on it made you feel ("Wow, the thought of having to wear a dress as a guy, that really made me get excited babe. I wonder if....").

 

-Tell her that you saw some show on cable TV (but you don't remember which one!), and it featured a woman who dominated her man, and made him dress up as a woman. If she says "Ew, that's sick", then sorry but you're out of luck. If she sounds interested, you can try to get her to think about trying it.

* * *

 

The bottom line: there is now easy way, unless you ran an add in the single's paper, and asked for a woman who was into feminization in the first place. Unfortunately, not all women are. But with some proper education, you can do it. Just remember:

-She has to believe that it will bring you closer together, not drive you apart.

-It is up to you to make her understand why you want to do it.

-She needs to see a benefit from it, especially in your relationship.

-You need for her not to be shocked or revolted by the idea, which might require some time for her to get comfortable with the concept.

 

Good luck out there, I'll be writing more some day in the not too distant future.....

JW

  

  

  

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