Tickles and Treats

by Angela Jane Muncey

A true story from my early days

 

I eyed the letter eagerly. The stamps would be great in my album. They seemed to be from Egypt or somewhere. Mum promised to give me the envelope as she sat down with a cup of tea to read.

"Oh, it's from Bert and Nel", she told me.

My ears pricked up, Uncle Bert's daughter Jane was my fave cousin and the same age as me. She was a bit of a tomboy and we had got on brilliantly when she stayed last. But, more of that later.

"They're coming home in the summer' said Mum, ' but they'll be stuck out there over Christmas". She read on 'till she got to the last page. "Oh, that's nice, Jane sends you tickles and treats. What a silly girl".

My tummy did a bit of a loop. I knew exactly what H meant but Mum didn't of course. When she last came to stay we would go off on our bikes to the woods and stop to eat our sandwiches then play T&T. We took turns to tickle each other and if we laughed we had to give a treat. A treat she said was to take off one item of clothing. As we were in shorts and T's with sandals it didn't take many tickles to produce two naked babes in the woods! Then we reversed the process finishing up wearing each others clothes. I wished and wished she would have worn a dress or something a bit more girly but being a tomboy she mostly wore my old play clothes. Any way at least Mum didn't realise we'd swapped clothes when we got home – at least I don't think she did.

I'd always had this secret yearning to wear a girly dress but my sister was five years younger and Mum's were gross. However two events that winter were to realise my dreams.

Mum got up, finished her tea and told me to get cleaned up as we had to go shopping for poor Aunt Nel who was stuck in Egypt over Christmas. Leaving my sister with Aunt Em who lived us we set off for Bromley on the bus.

"Do I have to Mum', I whined. I got a look that said yes.

"I need you to help me get some things on Nell's list "

I couldn't imagine what they could be but whiled away the journey dreaming of T&T.

We got off at the market square and went straight into the general outfitters where Mum used to buy my school uniform. I helped her choose a tie for Uncle, some shirts, a bag for Auntie and then up stairs we went to the children's department. I looked at some new soccer boots while Mum fussed through racks of winter dresses for Jane. Soon she had chosen two rather smart ones with smocking on the front in a sort of small brown check pattern.

"Which do you think she would like, or should I get both?"

I told her that H would probably prefer the soccer boots I had seen, but this did not go down well.

" Both I think", said Mum. "Now I wonder if the age ten or eleven"

An assistant appeared from nowhere. "What do you think', Mum asked her, 'she and Mike here are about the same size, or they were six months ago".

To my embarrassment she held them up against me as I tried to cringe away. "Don't be silly', said Mum, you and she used to swop shorts and T's last summer, you didn't seem to mind that"

Bright red is a poor description for the colour I turned, she did know after all!. The assistant came to my rescue; at least she thought she had.

"Why doesn't he just quickly try them on for size. The shop is quiet and we will be behind the screen".

Imagine how I felt. The chance of a lifetime but I felt I had to resist. Mum took charge saying it was a very good idea and I should be pleased to be helping my favourite cousin anyway.

So there I was down to my underpants with Mum slipping the dress over my head and doing up the buttons down the back and tying the sash. They ooh'd and ah'd over the fit and the cut. All in all they not only had me try four of the smocked dresses, Mum had spied a 'best dress' that she wanted to give H for Christmas. This was a red velvet dress with a little lace collar and a red silk sash. I tried that on too!

When Mum had bought them we moved on to the shoe department where we went through a similar performance with me trying on sandals, strappy patent shoes and a pair of red ballet shoes to go with the dress. Two younger boys with their Mum were buying sandals and kept looking at us and sniggering. I glared at them giving them a very rude sign that I hoped the Mums wouldn't see. Mum bought all sorts of other things like socks and pants and stuff.

As I had been such a sport Mum took us off to Lyons for my fave egg and chips on toast with baked beans.

"Oh', said Mum, 'just wait till we show Auntie the lovely things we have bought for Jane. You were so good about it', she said,.' Perhaps we should give Auntie a fashion parade" As I spluttered through a mouth full of chips and went beetroot red, she said," just kidding!"

My head was in a spin on the bus home. What an adventure and wouldn't I just love to do it all again.

When we got in, Auntie had bathed J and put her to bed. We sat in front of the fire while Mum told her about our adventure saying how good I had been. I tried to slink off to my room but Mum asked me to open the parcels to show Auntie while she made supper. I took out the dresses and shoes and laid them on the couch.

"Which do you like best?', said A. I muttered that the red velvet was pretty nice and she agreed. "I'd love to see it on Jane', she said.

Mum bustled in with the supper on a tray and started to set it out on the coffee table.

"Aren't they lovely' she cooed. "And Mike looked so cute in them, I wish you could have seen him Em. He would make such a pretty girl!"

"Shut up' I said, 'I'm a boy not a sissy."

"Oh come on', said A.' don't be a spoil sport. No one will see but us and your sister's in bed fast asleep." I resisted to the point where I thought they were going to give in but A. looked so crestfallen that I gave in.

Mum told A. to wait while she took me to the front room with the clothes. I had to take everything off as she unwrapped a pair of cotton panties with kind of lace edging and a similar vest. I put them on feeling very strange. Mum gave me a secret smile then popped the red velvet dress over my head. I went to go to A. but Mum called me back saying it would look better with the shoes and socks she had bought. I said it would be a shame to dirty H's new clothes but she said never mind and helped me to put on the white ankle socks that had a narrow frill of red lace and the black patents that she said our American cousins called MaryJanes. She fluffed up my fairly short hair opened her bag and put a little dab of powder on my nose and a little touch of her perfume behind my ears.

"Oh, if only I had film for the camera". I was rather grateful that she didn't of course. When we went in to see Auntie she practically went potty saying all sorts of squidgy stuff about how I should have been a girl after all and that. Mum calmed her down and said we should all eat our supper before it got cold. I wanted to change but mum said I should just be carefull and eat first. It felt very strange sitting there dressed just like a girl but kind of nice too. Mum looked at me and said,"fun, isn't it love". I muttered that it was sort of but they mustn't tell. They promised to keep the 'game' secret between us.

Auntie stood up to pour some more tea. As she turned around she knocked into me as I was finishing my cup. Horror of horrors, tea plashed all over the velvet frock and socks and shoes. I was pretty wet. Auntie was mortified and started to mop me up.

"Oh lord', said Mum, 'I hope we can dry clean it but I can't send it to Nell like that"

Auntie said that as she had been the clumsy one she would buy another outfit for Jane. Mum helped me off with the dress and stuff and ran a bath 'cos it was bed time. I had such sweet dreams!

The dress was dry cleaned and it didn't look too bad after all but Aunties new one went to Jane with all the other stuff. Mum hung the dress in the wardrobe I shared with my sister and to my surprise put the shoes, socks and undies I had worn in there too. "You never know when we might find a use for them", said mum with cryptic wink.

 

To be continued.

  

  

  

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