First, apologies to Mr. James Thurber for taking liberties with his story theme. I just thought it was a cute idea. I first got the idea from watching women do everyday things like flipping their long hair back and trying on clothes in a store, and feeling envy.

 

"T" Flights Of Fancy

by Lindsay Hart

 

"Walter, do you have everything you need?" Margaret asked in that annoying way. Sometimes I felt like she treated me like a child. Checking up on every little thing that I did, like I was incapable of taking care of myself, or without her help I was going to screw something up, or forget something important.

"Yes, dear, I have everything." I responded rather indignantly.

"Keys, wallet, checkbook, sunglasses?" she continued. I'm sure she doesn't even think about it any more. She's been doing it for so long that it is just second nature to her now. But how would she feel if I did the same thing to her. And she has even done it in front of our family and friends. It's so embarrassing sometimes.

"Yes dear, I have everything."

As she finished putting on her lipstick she said, "Oh, and add milk to the list."

'Damn, the list,' I thought to myself. 'Where did I put that list?' As Margaret was getting her sweater I found the list still on the counter and with the stealth of a ninja, slipped it into my pocket so Margaret wouldn't see I had forgotten it.

We got into our old '95 Ford and headed towards the mall. Ol' Blue wasn't much to look at any more but she was reliable, and we had grown comfortable with her. Not that we couldn't afford a new car, we could. In fact, we could afford just about whatever car we wanted. We just didn't think the newer cars had the character of the older cars. Anyway, it was a nice spring day. The weather was just starting to warm up, the sun was shinning bright, the birds were singing. It seemed to be a beautiful day for our shopping trip. I guess other people had the same thoughts because there seemed to be people everywhere enjoying the first warm day in some time.

As we pulled up and stopped at a stoplight I noticed a young couple walking on the sidewalk. It was obvious that they were in love and happy for each other's company as they played "grab ass" and "tickle". She was stunning. Fashion model good looks, long blonde hair that reached the middle of her back and appeared to glow as the sun reflected off of it. Her hair was tied back in a ponytail and kept in place with a bright red scrunchie that matched the lace trimmed tank she was wearing, which in turn, showed off her ample breast that stood up proud. Her small, thin waist indicated that she wasn't afraid of exercise to maintain her great figure. Her long shapely legs were perched on a beautiful pair of red sandals. And that cute blue skirt.

He had chiseled good looks with dark features, perhaps Italian or Spanish heritage. And those muscles. The man looked like he could bench press a Volkswagon.

"Jason, eeeehhh. STOP it!!! Stop tickling me! You know I have a hard time catching my breath when you tickle me so much," I said as I swatted Jason on the arm like it was really going to make him quit. My hitting Jason is probably akin to a fly biting an elephant.

"I'm sorry, Cheryl. I'll try to be good. I just can't help myself around you. You're so beautiful, and I love to see you laugh. And when you laugh so hard and can't catch your breath, well, you have that cute little snort. Cheryl, I love you."

"Oh, Jason, that's so sweet. I love you, too," I said. I reach up and wrap my arms around my boyfriend's neck and pull him to me and we embrace in a passionate kiss. My eyes are closed in bliss as our tongues dance, and then I realize … and I break our kiss. "Hey, … I do not snort!" and then I pout.

Jason grabs me around the waist as I feign having my feelings hurt. "Cheryl, don't be like that." Jason pulls me into his big strong arms and I melt in his kiss once again. And as we stood there totally oblivious to everything else in the world my defenses crumbled and my guard dropped. Without ever taking his lips off mine, through our kiss he manages to say, "yes, you do snort," and with lightning speed and the dexterity of a concert pianist his fingers find my stomach and ribs again in a ticklish assault.

"EEEEEHHHH!!!! Jassssooon!" Snoorrtt. I push away and spin quickly to get away from him and as I turn my long hair whips around and hits Jason square in the right eye. Jason winces from the sting and stops cold. I realize what happened and I move to comfort him. "Oh, baby, are you okay. I didn't mean to." I cup his face in my hands and he says ….

HONNNNNK

"Walter, what are you doing? The light is green and people are waiting."

We finally pulled into the mall parking lot and headed straight for J.C. Penney. Inside Margaret went towards the women's section. I told Margaret "Honey, I'll meet you in about an hour. I'm just going to go over to Sears to look around.

Margret said sternly, "Oh, no you don't. You will stay right by my side. The last time that I left you alone in Sears you bought that electric saw thing-a-ma-jiggy that you still haven't used because you still don't know how to use it. It's a paperweight that cost us $200. No sir, you're going to stay with me. Besides, I don't understand how, … but, I've actually come to value your opinions on the clothes that I buy. Somehow you have developed some fashion sense and I want you to help me pick out a couple of dresses for the Anderson's and the Martin's parties that are coming up."

Well, there aren't many times that I'm glad for loosing an argument with my wife, but this was one of them. I didn't mind helping her shop for clothes at all. That just meant that I could browse the racks and feel the wonderful fabrics without feeling too self-conscious because I'd be helping my wife. I always found the lady's clothing in Penney's to be quite stylish and I could always find things that I liked. I started looking through the racks of dresses in my wife's size. But, after a short while I had moved to the sizes that I could wear. I found this beautiful teal green chiffon evening gown with spaghetti straps and was admiring it in the mirror when a sales lady walked up to me and asked if she could help me. She was gorgeous with bright green eyes and raven black curly hair and wore a stylish burgundy skirt suit with a white satin blouse. I stuttered the all intelligent, "Whhat."

"Can I start a changing room for you, miss. By the way, you have excellent taste. That gown would look great on you." She took the gown and held it up to me and brushed her hand against my breast as she smoothed the gown on my frame. I smiled at the sales lady, whose name according to her name tag was Emily, and said, "Thank you Emily, that would be very nice."

Emily took the teal gown and disappeared around the corner all the while still looking at me and smiling. I continued to browse the sales racks and found two other dresses I thought would be suitable for the upcoming parties. The first was a black strapless with an asymmetrical hem line that would hit about three inches above the knee on the left and about mid calf on the right. The second was a red halter strap dress that was short and sexy.

Emily took the dresses in one hand and took my hand in her other hand and led me back to a changing room. Once in the changing room Emily closed the door, hung the dresses on a hook and without a word spoken, eased my zipper down. As she slipped my dress off my shoulders she caressed my breast and kissed me on the neck. I think she was impressed that I was wearing matching garter belt, bra, panties and slip, all in lavender satin and lace. When she saw my lingerie she smiled again and let out a small gasp.

"The teal dress first." she said as she helped slide the dress over my head, and slowly pulled the zipper up. Emily turned me around and looked me up and down licking her lips before saying, "I was right. You look good enough to eat."

Emily wrapped her arms around my trim waist and we embraced in a beautiful passionate kiss. My white tipped french manicured nails glistened as I ran my fingers through her long black hair. Emily stopped us saying only, "I want to see my girl in the other dresses."

Emily helped me out of the teal dress and knowing that the bra and slip I was wearing would not work with the next two dresses, slipped them off of me. She was like a cat after its prey as she moved to my breast and began to suck and caress them. My nipples were rock hard as she worked her tongue over them. I helped her ease her jacket off and tore into the buttons on her blouse. I reached for the clasp on her burgundy bra that matched her suit, but she grabbed my hand saying, "First things first, lover. You model for me and then you get your reward."

Emily helped me slip on the black dress then zipped me up. Emily moved me in front of the mirror and moved behind me wrapping her arms around my waist. I looked damn good in the black dress, even better than the teal dress. She brushed my long blond hair to one side and began kissing my neck again. I turned around to face her and asked, "Now, what about my reward?"

Emily kissed me gently and with a smile she stepped back and unfastened her bra and let it fall to the floor. Her breasts were beautiful with large nipples. I reached for them and heard …

"Mommy, that man wet his pants."

"Well, I never!" "Come, Julie, we're leaving this place before something else happens."

I looked down and noticed there was a wet spot on the front of the slacks I was wearing, but it definitely was not from accidentally wetting my pant. It was a different kind of accident. One that had been enjoyable at the time, but was only embarrassing now.

"Margaret, I have to go find the rest rooms, dear.

"Oh, alright Walter. They are around the corner to the right. But, you better not come back with anything that is not on the list."

About three hours later we left the mall with everything checked off the list except the milk. Our arms were full as we headed back to the car. I couldn't help be a little sad. There was not a single feminine item in any of the bags that was mine. But, I made a promise to myself to come back before the sale ends and look for that black dress.

On the way home we stopped at a convenience store to get the milk. I went inside while Margaret waited in the car. When I came out of the store Margaret pointed to the park across the street where there were numerous people milling around and one woman appeared to be wearing a wedding gown. Margaret suggested that we should go over and check it out.

I steered Ol' Blue into the park parking lot and found a space that would give us a good view of what they were doing and we wouldn't even need to leave the car. As it turned out, a Bride was having some pre-wedding photographs done in this wonderful outdoor setting.

The bride's dress was the traditional heavy white bridal satin with a tightly fitted waist and bodice. Above the bust was transparent lace that went to a high neck. The sleeves were transparent with seed pearls, puffy at the shoulder and tapered down to tight wrists. From the waist the dress flared out with a very full skirt and long train. Around the hem and all along the train were more seed pearls, lace and embroidery. The dress felt wonderful to wear, with the three petticoats underneath to add fullness to the skirt. And it looked amazing on me.

My Maid of Honor was helping with the shoot and I told her, "Mary, I am so glad that you and mother talked me into this dress. It's just so right. It feels like it is actually part of me now. I can't believe that I didn't really care for it at first. Thanks for not giving up on this dress." And I gave Mary a hug.

Ron, the photographer, called to me, "Sharon, lets get this next series with you sitting on the hill in the middle of all these wild flowers."

"Ok, Ron, you're the boss, at least today. Just make me look beautiful."

"Oh, Sharon, I don't have to do anything special to make you look beautiful. It just comes natural to you. You would look great even in a potato sack."

"Thank you, Ron. You're such a gentleman."

I sat in the flowers and Mary arranged my skirt. I turn this way and that for Ron, as he snaps picture after picture. It is mid afternoon and with all the petticoats and the heavy satin skirt I am beginning to get a little warm under my skirt. I am so glad that we decided not to have our wedding in the garden like we had originally wanted. I kind of let my mind wander and began thinking of my up-coming wedding. To think, in less than a month I would become Mrs. Robert Harden, a wife. I am such a lucky girl. I can't wait to make love to my husband.

Ron interrupted my thoughts. More directions. He says …

"Let's get going, Walter, we don't want the milk to spoil." Margaret said.

Once home we get everything put away and Margaret fixes us a great dinner. Fried pork chops, mashed potatoes and pork chop gravy, broccoli with cheese sauce, a tossed salad, and a nice rose' wine. Sometimes I forget what a good cook she is. I wish I could cook like that.

After dinner we sit down to our regular evening of watching television. I steal the remote away from Margaret and start channel surfing. Another lawyer show, no. A cop show, no. Another reality show, oh, please just shoot me in the foot. Wait, here's an old spy movie. I think these old spy movies are great. They just don't make movies like this any more. The hero is always dashing and sophisticated. The ladies are all very beautiful and elegant.

"We already have the codes to launch the missiles, Katarina. I don't need to keep you alive. But, you've been such a thorn in my side these past few weeks, I thought I would make you watch as I destroy your beloved Moscow. Then I'll kill you slowly and painfully."

It's true, I am in a real fix now. The ropes are cutting into my wrists, the blood mixing with my lipstick is an odd sensation, my dress has been torn up to my waist and my stockings, garter belt and panties were in full view of these simpletons that Dr. Devile used to do his heinous bidding. If this guy guarding me isn't careful he's going to drown in his own drool. Remind me to punch his lights out when I get loose. Oh, and I broke a nail.

"You haven't won yet, doctor. There's still time. You'll never get away with it."

"I admire your spunk. I suppose that you are still expecting your handsome Mr. Bond to rescue you and blow up my secret laboratory. Oh, did I forget to tell you that my men killed Mr. Bond. There's no saving you now. The missile launch sequence has already started and you have only minutes to live."

"Bond is dead?" Damn! Just like a man. You can never count on them to come through when the chips are down. If I can just get to the laser in my bra I can use it to cut through these ropes.

BOOOOOMMM!!!

The explosion knocked me out of my chair. Debris everywhere. The guard is down, no, he's getting up. Got to spin on my side.

Whack.

"How do you like my high heel on the side of your head, you lech?"

More explosions, and machinegun fire. Ta pocketa, pocketa, pocketa pocketa, pocketa. The lab is on fire now. Smoke filling the room. Got to cut these ropes.

"Katarina, where are you?"

"James, in here. Oh, James. Dr. Devile said you were dead, but, I had faith in you. I knew you would come for me."

James cuts me free and our lips meet in a kiss that would knock your heels off.

"Katarina, we'll have time for this later, but, we've got to get out of here, this whole place is going to blow."

"James, you're going to have to carry me. I twisted my ankle when I kicked the guard." My hero sweeps me up in his strong arms and carries me to safety and our lips meet again as I hold my soon-to-be lover tightly, …"

"Walter, don't forget that you have to take the trash out tonight. You forgot it again last week. I'm going on to bed. Don't stay up too late. You know that you daydream when you don't get enough sleep, so come to bed soon. I might even let you borrow that new green nightie that you helped me pick out today."

 

The End

Hope you enjoyed it. Thanks everybody. Love, Lindsay Hart

  

  

  

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