SRU: Better Than Plastic                      by Roy Del Frink     © 2000

Part 1

 

Mark and Susan Johnson had been married ten long, happy years. They were a perfect couple. Although they were childless, they planned to have children soon; in fact, Mark had tried to impregnate Susan for two months without success. Mark was pleased with his job balancing the bank’s checkbooks, and Susan was equally pleased to serve as receptionist for the local high school. Time was starting to wreak havoc on the thirty-something couple’s bodies; wrinkles were starting to show on their bodies, Susan’s ample but not oversized breasts were bending to gravity’s pull, and Mark’s hair was starting to thin and turn gray. Still, they both enjoyed their bodies, their marriage, and their lives. Except ... for the sex. Despite still loving each other as much as the honeymoon, their sexual adventures were turning dull as dishwater. And when they did make out, neither one enjoyed the experience. The week before, in fact, Mark had discovered his fading spark was leading to a lower sperm count. Bad news for a would-be father. Still, they were determined to have kids, and they wanted to spice up their sex lives.

One fateful Saturday afternoon, Mark and Susan were out buying groceries. After pulling out of the supermarket’s parking lot, Mark told Susan, "Dearest, I’m getting tired of the same old thing. I’d like some extra variety in our sex lives."

"Me too," Susan replied. "I know it’s not my style, but I’m feeling a little naughty. Why don’t we visit that adult superstore in the mall near the old, run-down part of town? I’ve heard they have everything two consenting adults could possibly need."

"Okay." Mark changed direction, steering the station wagon away from home and towards the superstore. Both husband and wife thought about what kind of kinky thing might put the fun back into their romance. It would be especially important to raise Mark’s sperm count if Susan would ever bear a child.

Ten minutes later, the car hung a left into the Happy Trails Shopping Center. It was one of those old-fashioned deals, with individual buildings for each store. Mark and Susan got out of the car, and walked through the mall. But between Pete’s Pets and The Fashion Plate, where The Love Nest was supposed to be, they saw something rather funny. It was a quaint wooden shop called Spells R Us. Judging by the interior, it seemed to be a dusty old antiques store, though it was way too small for that. The Johnsons were disappointed, but they figured they wouldn’t go this far out of the way for nothing, so they went it.

The door opened with a loud creaking sound. A bell over the door tingled. Mark and Susan took in the place. Although it still had the look and feel of an antiques shop, they didn’t see the furnishings one would expect to find in such a place. Instead, it was mostly full of odd-looking gadgets, bottles of colored liquid, costumes, jewelry, and a few odds and ends. The interior also looked much larger than the exterior had suggested. To the left of the door, they saw a counter with an old man behind it. He was wearing a bathrobe that truly looked antique. For that matter, so did the old man. He just stared at his new visitors and asked them, "So, Mark, had any luck knocking Susan up?"

"No," Mark sighed, then he suddenly lashed out at the old man. "How dare you talk to me about my wife like that! But how did you know out names?"

The man just smiled and pointed to a sign in front of the counter. It said, "I’m a wizard. Just accept it."

"And how did you know of our desire to have kids?" Susan queried.

"Don’t make me show you the sign again," the old man warned. "Let’s get down to business. What do you want."

Mark sighed and said, "We WANT to find The Love Nest, not an antiques store. We’re looking for some sort of sex aid to liven up our marriage."

"Oh, but that’s precisely what Spells R Us caters towards, Mark! It just so happens I got these in yesterday, and I think it’s exactly the sort of thing you and Susan would enjoy." He pulled out a box from under the counter, and opened it. Inside were two very realistic-looking fake penises (complete with testes), vaginas and breast pairs. "It’s a new product from the up-and-coming Better Than Plastic company. Just put these things onto your bodies, and let the fun begin. I must tell you, though, that these things are still experimental. Be warned that nobody knows what will happen if you use all the parts at once. I wouldn’t suggest it."

"Sure, why not?" Susan replied. "I’ve been looking for a lark. How much?"

"Twenty dollars buys the whole set."

"Deal!" Mark replied. He pulled a green sheet of paper with Andrew Jackson’s photo out of his wallet and handed it to the wizard. The couple left the store and drove home, wondering what these new things would do.

The wizard stared at the wolf at his side, then chuckled at the thought of what would happen next. He’d have to set the Crystal Cassette Recorder to show Dannie the spectacle that was about to unfold. Heck with Dannie, he wanted to keep this one for posterity. Watching this would entertain him while business was slow. His only regret was that he couldn’t watch it first-hand; the fellow in Philadelphia that he’d sold a purification potion to just an hour before was about to turn into his own fantasy babe.

Mark and Susan got home a half-hour later. After putting the groceries away, they pulled their new sex gadgets out of the trunk, and placed them on the dresser in their bedroom. The couple spent the rest of the afternoon wondering what was so special about those danged things; Mark had plunged into fake pussies before, and Susan had played with dildoes and vibrators, with no special thrills or enjoyment. Those Better Than Plastic dealies would have to provide some damned good pleasure if they would rejuvenate their marriage. The couple had some delicious Swedish meatballs for dinner, but the new toys were all they could talk about. Finally, they finished the Sara Lee poundcake served for dessert, ran upstairs into the bedroom, and started their fun, staring at each other’s naked forms for possible improvements.

Mark was a short gentleman, about five foot nine. His brown hair and blue eyes lent a handsome quality to his face, even if he didn’t have many muscles. He spoke with a high, melodic tenor. The sole redeeming quality in his body (or so he thought) was his dick, about nine inches long when hard and worth every millimeter.

Susan, on the other hand, was a rather tall lady. At five foot eight, she was almost as tall as her husband. Her red hair and green eyes lent a slightly Irish look to her face. She sang with a raspy contralto, which was surprisingly close to Mark’s voice range. Her body had a fairly good, though not drop-dead gorgeous, hourglass figure. She wore C-cup bras, and her stomach didn’t have much fat deposited on it. She was certainly not a potential Playboy Playmate, but her body was good enough for Mark. And she could take all of him in, too.

The couple decided to start small. Susan grabbed a pair of fake breasts from the box. She put them on her body, over her real ones. Instantly she felt an odd sensation course through her body, like magic. She started rubbing her new fake G-cup boobs with inch-long nipples, and to her surprise, she felt them back. They were now really a part of her! Pleasures previously unknown to Susan swelled inside her and filled her up. Mark stared at the whole process in awe, and started pumping Susan up then and there. Mark figured those new things shouldn’t go to waste, so he started suckling at her new left teat, while playing with her right breast. The nipples hardened into large cylinders, and her left one started squirting milk into Mark’s waiting mouth as she came. Mark then switched to Susan’s right tit, fingering her left one. As soon as her right breast also lactated, Mark and Susan came simultaneously. Neither one lost a beat the whole time, having perfected this maneuver during previous sexual encounters. Susan found the lactation surprising; she had never given breast milk before.

After coming down from their highs, Mark and Susan realized the whole thing felt oddly satisfying. They hadn’t felt this way in years! Mark now grabbed one of the Better Than Plastic penises, slipping it over his own. It was thirteen inches long and four inches thick, and the attached balls were also larger than his own. He asked Susan to start jacking him off, and to his surprise he felt her inch-long nails reaching into his prick. The thing was now a part of him! Grinning wickedly, he slipped out of Susan’s fingers and into her vaginal opening. He started to thrust in and out, but to his horror, Susan couldn’t take it. He was too large! Susan started crying, realizing she ‘d never be able to take Mark’s new and improved plaything in.

Unless... She grabbed one of the vaginal orifices, and placed it over her own. Mark teased her with his tongue, and Susan was stunned at how pleased her husband was making her feel. As she teased her new, enlarged clit (it was about a centimeter long, and clearly visible to Mark), Susan gushed her bodily fluids out and wailed like a banshee as she came. Mark stepped back and pushed himself into the new pussy, while passionately locking lips with Susan. She was surprised that she could now take Mark easily. Mark just fucked Susan silly until they both came several times, and French-kissed each other in the process. Mark was surprised how well his tool held up; usually he couldn’t get it up again about ten minutes after releasing a load, but now he could continue to pump Susan all night if he wanted to. And his releases were astoundingly large; it was almost as if his supply of sperm was now unlimited. Susan was also amazed how quickly and often she was orgasming. The couple felt oddly aroused, like never before. They decided to call it a night, but Susan realized her larger breasts would cause everyone to ask questions, so she slipped her fingers around them and tried pulling them off. To her surprise, the globes came off easily, and her smaller, teardrop-shaped mounds revealed themselves. Mark pulled his fake penis off quickly, and removed Susan’s uber pussy off by surrounding it with his hands and rotating. Now back to their normal selves, Mark and Susan fell asleep, naked in each others’ arms, in their bed.

The following morning, the wizard played the Johnsons’ sexual romp back to Dannie on his CCR. "I enjoy sex just as much as anybody else. But I didn’t really enjoy that demonstration. Why did you make me sit through that smut?"

"Dannie," the old man replied, "it’s all part of the Spells R Us business. If you’re gonna run your own SRU franchise, you’ll have to learn what happens to your customers. You need to know what they want, and what will give it to them. Or, you can be real sneaky like me and put a little twist in. I know how kinky the Johnsons like their sex, so for the next couple weeks you can watch just how my ‘little twists’ work.

"I appreciate the way you’ve handled a couple referrals, so it’s time for you to serve your first customer. A man will walk through the door in thirty seconds. You know the inventory well, so concentrate on the customer. Try reading his aura, and tell me two things: what kind of a person he is, and what you think he deserves. There’s no better time than the present to practice your magical talents on your first customer."

Just as he finished speaking, Dannie got behind the counter while the old man watched from the backroom. A tall, balding gentlemen walked through the door. He was wearing a cheesy polyester suit that suggested the very essence of sleaze. Before he spoke a word, Dannie told him, "Hi, Fred. I know how you want to make females have sex with you."

"But how did you know..." Fred replied.

Dannie told him, "I’m a wizard in training. I should know about this stuff." She reached under the counter for a small pink vial. "Drink this, and I guarantee, you shall have sex with all the women you want."

"Thank you, madam. I shall enjoy this. How much?"

"Seven dollars and twenty-three cents."

Fred reached into his wallet, and lo and behold, exactly seven dollars and twenty-three cents were inside. He gave the cash to Dannie, then left the store.

"Brilliant work, Dannie! I really love the way you counted the contents of his wallet. Now tell me what Fred was REALLY like, and why you chose the Lesbo-Matic potion."

"He’s a convicted child molester, and I gave him the Lesbo-Matic so that he won’t ever assault innocent little girls again. The potion is a punishment of sorts. He will become twelve-year-old Frederika, and grow up a sex-crazed lesbian who will enjoy the company of multiple consenting partners, all female."

"I’m so proud of you. You only made one minor mistake: he’s a convicted rapist, not a convicted child molester. His victims were adult females. Still, that was only a minor error, and the potion will work just as well as you intended it to. A truly commendable first effort, Dannie. In a few months, you should have the ropes of this business down pat."

Mark and Susan enjoyed their Better Than Plastic sex toys, which certainly lived up to their names. In fact, after a repeat of their Saturday night romp on Sunday, Mark took to wearing the "dildo" permanently, and Susan did the same with the fake vagina. She decided not to wear the more-obvious breasts outside the house. On every night from Monday to Friday, Mark and Susan tried using their toys in different positions. Mark entered Susan from behind. Susan gave Mark a blow job and a hand job. They even tried a tittie-fuck, for variety. But on Friday, the sex felt dull and repetitive. They’d done just about everything a man and a woman could do. Even experimenting with a few different positions hadn’t brought any more excitement into their love-making.

On Saturday, Mark remembered that the box had TWO of everything. A bright flash occurred to him: why not use the extra parts? He pulled the second penis, identical to the first, out of the box and, on a whim, decided to place it over his mouth. To his surprise, it stuck to this foreign surface. He proceeded to give his wife a blow job while screwing her in the more conventional method at the same time. Both Mark and Susan found this new, odd way of having sex surprisingly erotic, and both came in a couple minutes. Then Mark removed the cock from his mouth, and attached it next to his other one. Following his lead, Susan removed the other pussy and place it next to her existing one. Mark then double-fucked his wife, and the double release was another erotic sensation the likes of which neither had felt before.

After this, Mark and Susan got hooked on trying new and bizarre forms of sex. Mark entered Susan from the front and the rear at the same time. Susan put the extra pussy over her butt, as Mark tried another double entry. Susan applied all four gigantic lactating breasts to her torso at once, and fondled two of them while Mark took the other two. She even discovered she could now suck herself, with a little practice. Once Mark and Susan even tried putting the extra genitals over their navels, and pumped while using the "regular" ones at the same time. Kinky experiments like these occupied the couple’s nightly sexcapades for the next week.

The wizard watched their fourteenth romp with the new gadgets on Friday night. Dannie watched too, mouth agape, and could only say, "Boy, those two are really into twisted sex, aren’t they?"

"They sure are," the old man replied. "And it’s a good thing I stocked up on CCR tapes last month, because I’ve never seen any two people do such delightfully twisted sex without changing their gender. Oh, that reminds me Dannie, tomorrow they enter Stage Three. Soon those gadgets will do exactly what they were designed for."

"But you told them..."

"Of course I know exactly what they’ll do. I just have to warn them not to. But I’ve yet to serve a mortal who can totally avoid tempting fate. And when you tempt fate around me, I always give in."

Dannie thought about that for a couple minutes, then spoke. "Wizard, you’re the craziest, most kinky, biggest rascal I’ve ever met. You’re a horrible role model." She paused, then added, "And that’s what I like about you most of all."

The wizard chuckled. Dannie was learning fast.

On the third Saturday night, their fifteenth, they used the sex gadgets, boredom had set in again. Mark had placed penises all over his body, and Susan had pressed vaginas and breasts in every conceivable place as well. But once again, the two of them were starting to settle into a rut. Was there anything they could do with the devices they hadn’t tried yet?

Yes, there was, Susan realized. They could mix them up! She took off her fake cunt, and placed one of the dicks over her feminine opening. She also removed the large fake breasts. She was a little disappointed she couldn’t remove her real bosoms, which would have made her idea even better. Following her lead, Mark removed his cock and placed the vagina Susan removed over it. He also placed a pair of oversized breasts on his chest. Now Susan plowed into Mark, after years of doing it the other way around. Susan was determined to play with Mark’s breasts, and rubbed them with her hands. When she started suckling at them, Mark squirted freely from his ample boobs. Mark and Susan both enjoyed these new sensations, even if each one’s partner had done so dozens of times already.

"Wow!" Mark yelled. "Is this what it feels like to be a woman?"

"Well, it’s been enhanced magically, Mark, but yes, that’s usually about how it feels. But for the man! I never knew a release could feel so powerful," Susan replied. "Now that we’ve broken the gender barrier, what should we try next?"

"I’ve got a few ideas," Mark exclaimed with a sly grin on his face. Susan giggled back at him.

Susan put the breasts back on, and the two screwed while locking their tongues and rubbing their breasts together. Not only did both release again, but breast milk gushed out of both Mark and Susan as they came. Then Mark and Susan exchanged their genitals and did the whole thing again, switching roles. Afterwards, Susan removed her female opening and put a male organ in its place. Now that both were she-males, Mark and Susan tried anal sex, blow-jobs, and tittie-fucks on each other. They felt that was enough for one night, so Mark removed the breasts. Both now reattached their "normal" orifices before falling asleep.

Sunday, Mark got another twisted idea. He placed the extra pussy over his butt, while Susan attached the extra shaft to her groin. It took plenty of squirming and careful positioning, but Mark managed to pump his wife while Susan trust in and out of her husband. This was a new thrill for them, and Susan let out a deep orgasmic moan as she climaxed with both organs at once. Mark also screamed when he let out a double release.

After that, Mark asked Susan if she wanted to try a new thrill only a handful of humans ever get to experience. Susan agreed. Mark took the pussy off his butt, and stretched it squarely between his legs. Susan took the ‘dildo’ off, and repositioned it directly over her clitoris. Mark reached for the breasts, and got ready to place them on his chest.

"What are you doing, Mark?" Susan inquired. "Don’t you remember that kooky salesman telling us not to use all six of our marvelous toys at once?"

"Aaah, don’t worry about it. Nothing’s gonna happen, Susan. Just enjoy it while you can, then we’ll remove the unneeded parts when we’re done."

Susan groaned. "All right. But if anything bad happens, it’s your fault."

Mark locked the breasts into place. Now that husband and wife both had two full sets of sexual organs, they licked each others’ pussies while giving each other hand-jobs. This was quite a thrill for the couple. Next they gave each other a tittie-fuck while probing into their damp openings. This, too, was an amazing experience. Finally, they went for the ultimate. Mark and Susan pumped their male organs into each others’ feminine openings, while locking tongues, rubbing their breasts and nipples together, and fingering each other’s assholes. An extremely difficult maneuver, but after about half an hour, they were rewarded with an orgasm so amazing, no words could be used to describe it. They squirted into each other, squirted onto each other, and gushed milk all over the other’s chest. The six releases just about wore them out, and left their torsos coated in liquid. After a quick trip to the bathroom to clean off, Mark and Susan dozed off in a loving embrace.

Monday morning, Mark and Susan realized they hadn’t removed their bodily gadgets after the previous night’s heavenly romp. Mark tried taking his breasts off, but they were stuck. Susan found hers wouldn’t come off either. They even tried removing the genitalia, with no luck. Dismayed, Mark and Susan both called sick for work, then went back to the place they met the Spells R Us wizard. The old man had some explaining to do.

The Johnsons found the shop exactly where they’d seen it last. With huffed breath, both stormed into the store. They found the old man behind the counter, a wry grin on his face.

"Why, hello, Mark and Susan. What can I do to you... errr, for you?"

"Can it, wiseguy," Mark grunted. "Those sex toys you gave us won’t detach!"

The wizard sternly told them, "I warned you not to use all six things at once. I guess this is what happens when you don’t obey the instructions."

"But... " Susan protested.

"But nothing. You did this to yourselves, so you’ll have to deal with it. And I’d love to change you back, but I’m afraid that Wizard’s Code of Conduct, Chapter 7, Article III, Clause 2 forbids me."

"What’s it say?" Mark gasped.

"I quote, ‘No wizard shall transform, modify, or interfere with the body of an unborn human being.’"

"You mean..." Susan moaned, barely able to told back the tears.

"That’s right, Susan. When you last took in your husband, you became pregnant. Congratulations!"

Susan couldn’t stop crying, though she wasn’t sure if they were tears of joy or tears of sorrow. Mark, upset at the wizard’s self-proclaimed moralizing, demanded to be changed back.

"Sorry, Mark, but I can’t change you either. For the same reason I can’t change Susan."

"Oh, no! That’s not possible! I’m a man! And Susan’s a woman!"

"Not any more you’re not. Mark, did it ever occur to you that those body parts were fully functional? Well, that feminine opening gave you an entire female reproductive system. And Susan’s dildo gave her fully-operational male organs. The two of you now bear each others’ child. Congratulations, you two! Both of you are a mother - AND a father! How many people ever get to say that?"

Mark started to weep as he and Susan left the shop. Just as they left, Dannie emerged from the back.

"I heard everything you just said, wiz, and I don’t know what you’re talking about. What’s this about a ‘Wizard’s Code of Conduct’? You never mentioned it before."

"That’s because I just made the whole thing up," he replied, then winked at her.

Dannie giggled, then returned to the back to sort the inventory. She could hardly wait to acquire her own Spells R Us franchise.

 

(continued in Part 2)

© 2000
The above work is the copyrighted material. Anyone wishing to copy, archive, or re-post this story must contact the author for permission.