Showgirl

Janet L. Stickney
JanetLynn17@Hotmail.com

 

I was scared to death, but I felt the hand on my back, and with a gentle shove, I was out on stage. The outfit I had on was like a swimsuit except that it had glitter all over the bright red material. Nude hose covered my legs, making them shiny and smooth, the red heels shaping my legs. The tiara on my head glittered with rhinestones as the lights fell on me. I had no choice but to do my best, and strutted out to center stage with a big smile on my face. I posed this way and that as the camera flashes lit up in the audience. The music played as I walked around, then I moved to a smaller stage, stepped up and stood there smiling as the other nine girls came out.

I’m a guy, so you might ask yourself why I was on stage dressed like that; well, I got roped into it. During a Student Union meeting we were discussing ways to help the emergency people that lost so much in the tragedy, throwing out ideas like car washes and so on, when someone suggested a beauty contest. Of course, you can’t make a lot of money on a mere beauty contest, then someone else suggested that only guys participate! The ripple of laughter that ran through the students was quickly quelled as all of the guys realized what might happen, to them, or to their friends. You cannot imagine the terror that went through me. I had been playing dress up all my life, and while nobody knew, you can imagine how I felt. As the idea was worked out, it was finally decided that just picking guys at random wouldn’t work, since like all schools, we have some guys nearing 7 foot and weighing in at almost 300 pounds!

That meant that if you excluded all of the guys that surely couldn’t do it, you reduced the number by almost half, and of those that were left, about half of those were too gangly, handicapped, stupid, or had a solid reason they couldn’t do it. That left about 50, of which I was one. Looking around at the other 49 guys in the same boat as I was in, I realized that at least some of them might turn out to look spectacular as girls. I did not put myself into that category, but I was at least smart enough to figure that I would probably be one of the guys stuck doing it, and I was right. I was chosen to participate by the teachers in an arbitrary way that they would not discuss with any of the guys chosen. Of the 50, they got it down to 30. Rumor had it that they had called all of the parents to make sure the boys would be allowed to do it, which probably reduced the number by at least a third, then the rest for various other reasons, probably including the cost. In any case, I was notified in writing that I had been selected, plus, I was given a long list of things they, the teachers, thought should happen.

The very first thing on the list was a demand that all of those selected appear, fully dressed as a girl, so they could assess us, using some criteria they would not discuss with us, and that was followed by a list of what they thought would be proper attire for the assessment, which were skirts and blouses or modest dresses, low to medium heels, proper makeup, hair, and jewelry. On Friday after school I took the letter home, elated that I would be able to get dressed and be "out", but also knowing that my sister was going to have a field day when she found out. I’m a Junior while she is in college, but since she comes home once in a while, many of her clothes were still in her closet, and that gave me plenty to chose from. Mom knew that I liked to get dressed up since she had caught me a few times, so I wondered what she was going to say when she found out I was selected.

I watched her as she read the letter, both elated and afraid at the same time. Her eyes scanned the letter, then as she looked up at me, I saw her smile.

"It looks like you’re about to get your chance to find out what it’s like to be a girl!" What could I say? Mom already knew that I liked to dress up, so there was no way to deny that this was a chance for me to express myself, but what if the other kids found out that I liked it? "It says here that you have to appear on Monday morning at ten, so that gives us the entire weekend to get you ready for your public debut! You go and pick out what you’re going to wear, I’m sure that you have something in mind, then we’ll begin in the morning."

I bowed to my own urges and mom’s directive, going into my sisters room to retrieve the outfit I knew that I was going to wear. Soft tan and black stripes on a white background, the skirt was short with pleats, and was the perfect skirt for school. I picked out the white blouse with the round collar and the matching tan sweater and went back to my own room, hanging the clothes in my closet. Then I dug out my bra, birdseed breast forms, hip padding and pantybrief, putting them on my dresser. I didn’t need mom to get ready, but she had it in her mind, so I resigned myself to it and simply set my small makeup kit along side my other things. When I went in the kitchen mom was making dinner, so I helped out by setting the table.

"Tell me. Do you use your own underwear? Or do you borrow Audrey’s?"

"I have one pair of panties, but…"

"Right after dinner why don’t you and I go shopping? You’ll need to have you own panties and pantyhose, then we can see what else you might need tomorrow."

That’s exactly what we did; we went shopping, with mom buying some panties, plus, after I told her what size, another bra, pantyhose, and a pair of low black heels that I had to try on. Then we went home and simply watched television that night. Mom didn’t ask, so I didn’t tell her that my skin was already hairless, which meant that all I would have to do in the morning was my once a week shave. That night I borrowed a nightgown from my sister and slept in it, only the second time I had ever done that. In the morning, right after breakfast, I took a shower, shaved and generally checked myself for stray hair, then went in my bedroom where mom was waiting. I opened the package of panties, took a pair, and turning around, pulled them on, fixing myself so that it wasn’t so obvious that I was a boy. Still wearing the robe, mom took me to her bedroom and began to do my hair, starting with rollers and hairspray, which left me feeling very alien like. I had never used rollers before, so it was an entirely new but not unpleasant sensation. Mom let me get dressed, so I went in my room and shut the door.

I do a few things that I didn’t want mom to know about, and as I pulled out the tape, I looked down with a grin. I took the panties off, then taped myself in a way that made me look like a girl yet left me able to use the bathroom, then using the tape once again, I created a small but modest bit of cleavage, a trick I had found on the Internet. When I was ready I put the bra on, filling the cups with my breast forms, adjusting them so that along with my cleavage, it looked like I had boobs! Fortunately, it turned out better than I had ever managed before! Then I went in Audrey’s room, sat at her vanity, and began my makeup. I never used very much, usually just foundation and eyeliner, but I wanted to make a statement, so after I had the foundation and powder on, I used the light green, plum, and soft brown eye shadow, blending them the best I could before I added the eyeliner above and below my eyes. Blusher, and a bit of mascara, then I went back to my room to get dressed, starting with the pantyhose. I shoved the padding under my panties after I had the pantyhose on then pulled on the pantybrief which gave me a smooth and very feminine look.

Finally, I slipped on the blouse, then the skirt and lastly the sweater, straightening everything out before I stepped into the new heels. When I was ready, I added lipstick and earrings, then I called for mom so she could finish my hair. Her mouth formed a circle, but she quickly recovered and took the rollers out, letting me brush out my hair as she directed. When I was done, the girl we both saw bore no resemblance to the boy she raised.

"Damn! You’ve become…quite good at looking like a girl!"

"Thanks mom, but you’re not just saying that are you? I mean, do I look okay? Really?"

"Really! I had no idea that you would look so fantastic!"

The sweater formed over my small breasts, softening and rounding them while the skirt, at mid thigh on me, revealed just how shapely my legs were. As I stood looking in the mirror I was very proud of myself, since I had never managed to look so good, and the only reason possible was that I didn’t have to hide any more. Mom handed me her perfume which I used sparingly, then picked up the black purse that I had set on the bed. Inside was my wallet, one of my sister’s old ones, complete with a school ID, library card, a picture of myself, and a drivers license that I had created using a scanner and my computer. Mom didn’t know I had those and I didn’t tell her. I stood there for a moment, then mom told me to follow her, and we went into the familyroom where she took at least 20 more pictures of me in all sorts of poses.

"You do know that you’re sure to be accepted as one of the girls in the charity show don’t you?" I nodded my head yes. "And that it might mean that you’ll have to go to school dressed this way?"

‘Maybe, maybe not mom."

"I’ll bet you do, and if that’s the case, once we find out I mean, you might want to move into Audrey’s room until this is all over. I mean, that’s where all of the clothes are, and it does look like you can probably wear most of them anyway, so why not? It has a vanity, a big mirror, and you’ll have everything you need without all that carting things back and forth."

I didn’t say anything, then mom shook her head. "What’s wrong mom?"

"I just didn’t expect you to look so darned good, and well, I…"

"You don’t like it, I can tell."

"No dear, I hate it. I never liked the idea that my son liked to dress as a girl, but I’ve managed to cope with that, what I hate is the fact that you’re so pretty! Besides, knowing how much you like to dress up, I can see this quickly taking over your life, especially as you get more comfortable as a girl!" With a sigh, mom sat down. "Honey, let’s not kid ourselves. You like to dress as a girl, I’ve always known that, but if you do have to attend school as a girl for very long, I’m willing to bet that you won’t be able to give it up quite as easily as you think! Then what? What will happen then? Will I still have a son? Or another daughter?"

I had no answer for her because I didn’t know myself, but I was willing to accept that she was right since my fondest dream had always been to become a girl. Telling me that I might as well get used to being in public, she grabbed her purse and pointed at the door. Since I had never left the house dressed as a girl before, I tightened up, but mom opened the door and I soon found myself outside. Since she knew that I could drive, she told me that I might as well learn to get used to driving in heels, and that it was as good a time as any, and we were soon at the mall. I knew that both my greatest thrill and worst nightmare could occur in there, but I gathered all of my courage and went inside, with mom leading the way. We didn’t really need to buy anything, it was just to get me used to being around people dressed as a girl, but I soon found myself standing in an expensive lingerie shop surrounded by girls my age, some that I knew! Mom was nonplussed as she looked around, and to protect myself I stayed very close to her so nobody would guess who I was.

"Am I correct" mom asked, "in guessing that you’ll need a sponsor? Someone, or some shop, that will contribute money to the charity this show is supporting?"

"Yeah, but I…"

Turning to the sales lady, mom asked to speak to the manager, then, when she appeared, mom told her all about the show, pointing to me, telling her that I was going to be one of the entrants, and asked her if she would be my sponsor! The lady looked over at me with doubt written on her face, but when mom assured her that I was a boy, and could prove it, she smiled, then laughed!

"Okay, I’ll sponsor her, but in return, she’ll have to use our products. That way I can use the charity show as a write off, and at the same time point out that if we can make a boy look like that, what will it do for a woman?"

She and mom both looked at me, then the woman whispered in mom’s ear.

"She has asked us to come back tomorrow, but for right now I want you to take this honey, you can use it to train your figure."

I took the corselet she had in her hand and held it as mom slipped around a small table, picking through what was there, then…

"Joyce! How are you?! I haven’t seen you for absolutely ages!" Turning, I saw that it was a friend of my mothers from church! "And this is Audrey! What a pretty girl!"

"This isn’t Audrey, this is…my daughter Natalie!"

"Oh God! I’m terribly sorry my dear, I thought you were Audrey!"

"That’s okay Carol, Natalie and I were just shopping, nosing around for good buys."

"Well listen" Carol said a bit gaily, " There’s a mixer tonight at the church, why don’t the two of you come? They’ll have a band, and there’s always plenty of young men around, so Natalie won’t fee lost while us older folks meet and talk. I hate to mention it dear, but you have been single for quite a while now, and maybe it’s time that you started looking around!"

Desperately staring at mom, I heard her tell Carol that she would think about it, but didn’t promise to be there. I was relieved, and relaxed as mom paid the bill. On the way out she suggested that maybe Carol was right! When she reminded me that it wasn’t going to be very long before she was all alone, I got that sinking feeling in my stomach; her tone of voice told me that she, maybe even both of us would be going! She improved on that guess when she took me into a dress shop, telling me that I should have a nice party dress of my own. It didn’t take long for me to find several that I liked, and out of those, she and I narrowed the choice to one, which she bought. Then we went home. On the way, mom confirmed my guess. She told me we were going.

I really wanted to tell mom that I wasn’t going, then again, I really wanted to go! Caught between the two facets of my life, fear and desire, I found that I was unable to say no. I had my first taste of what it was like to be out of the house as a girl, and I wanted more, lots more. Besides, not one person, not even the girls I went to school with that had seen me in the lingerie store knew who I was! As I slipped off the sweater, skirt and blouse, I looked at the corselet lying on the bed, picking it up so I could try it on. The tight fit was nothing, and as I tightened the laces and my waist grew smaller, I felt an overwhelming sense of my own femininity as my breasts swelled, partially filling the cups of the built in bra, and of course, a smaller waist made my hips look more natural. I pulled the new dress over my head and zipped it up, feeling the silky material on my skin, reveling in the fact that for the first time, I had a party dress of my own! The dress was dark green, shiny in the light, with a square neckline and a chiffon skirt in a lighter green that had a satin lining under it that moved delicately with every movement I made. There was no way that I could describe how I felt right then, but I stepped into my shoes and went to show mom.

"God. I couldn’t believe when I saw her! She’s gorgeous!"….."Yes, but when we went to the mall, nobody even looked twice at her, unless it was to ogle!"…"What?…No, but we’re going to the church mixer tonight, so I’ll know better by the time we get home."…mom turned and saw me, then handed me the phone, "it’s Audrey".

The first words out of my sister’s mouth were, "its about time!" Then she went on to tell me that I should probably go ahead and move into her room, since she was going to stay at the school since she had a job, adding that she wanted to see the pictures mom took. I promised to email them to her, then handed the phone to back to mom. I stood there until she was done, then waited for her to comment on the dress, which she did, suggesting that I wear pearls when we went out that night. I went to my room, took off the dress and slipped on a pair of Audrey’s cut off jean shorts and put the blouse back on without tucking it in, and put my gym shoes on before I went back to the familyroom. The mixer was about four hours off, so I had plenty of time to relax. I was sitting there, sort of sprawled out when mom took a few more pictures, making me stand up for a few more, then, to provoke her a little, I bent at the waist and turned around, but she took one of my backside instead of getting riled up!

About an hour later mom came and told me to get ready, since we were going out to dinner before the mixer, but before I did that…

"Mom?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you pick the name Natalie?"

"Because if you had been born a girl, that would have been your name. Why? Don’t you like it?"

"Well, I sort of have ID in another name."

"You do! What name did you use?"

"Beverly, but Natalie is fine with me, I’ll just have to redo my ID is all."

"I see! Computer fakes?" I nodded my head yes. "Well, add the middle initial E for Elaine then."

I washed off the makeup and did it over, then got dressed, wearing my sisters pearl earrings and necklace, then mom and I went to dinner, which was nice but not overly expensive before we drove to the church. I had never been to a mixer and didn’t know anything about them, so mom filled me in, telling me that it was a way for single parents to meet each other. She also told me that some parents also brought their kids along, just in case they met someone they liked. In effect, she was using me to let any men that were attracted to her know that she had teenagers in the house. The only problem with that was they would see a girl, which of course, I wasn’t. As we walked in we both got a name tag, then mom saw her friend and walked over. We joined her, but to my chagrin, her son was sitting there, and I knew him. Bill was one of the guys eliminated because of their size. Well over six foot and weighing in at close to 240, he would have been impressive anyway, but Bill liked the tough guy look and had shaved his head to look meaner. When he looked at me I felt like nothing more than weak prey for him, fresh meat in other words.

People drifted in and began to talk, but I didn’t say anything to Bill for fear that he would figure out who I was, but after a bit I realized how stupid that was. After all, I was going to start school on Monday morning as a girl, and he would certainly find out then anyway. So I sat there watching the people, waiting for him to speak to me, but he remained silent until a guy walked up to talk to his mother, then he looked at me an moved his head as if to ask me to walk away with him. I got up when he did, then followed him to the small buffet table.

"Punch?"

"Yes, thanks" I said softly.

"It took me a bit, but I know who you are…"

"Who am I then?"

"You’re Chuck, Audrey’s brother. You’re one of the guys doing the girl thing for that charity show."

"How did you know? I thought I looked good!"

"Believe me, you look really good" he said with a grin, "but I know your mother, remember? I knew you weren’t Audrey, she’s already graduated, so you had to be Chuck. There wasn’t any other answer!" Pausing…"But damn! You look really good all dressed up like that! I wouldn’t have known, except for seeing you with your mother."

"Thanks, but don’t tell anyone. This is sort of a test for me."

"I don’t think anyone would believe me if I did tell! By the way, what do I call you?"

"Natalie" I said with a smile, "but tell me, everyone thinks you’re this great big tough guy, so why is it that you aren’t…"

"I am a great big tough guy, at least that’s what I want everyone to think, but I don’t bother girls, especially the pretty ones…like you."

"Me?! But I’m not! You know who I am, and…"

"That doesn’t mean that you’re not really cute as a girl, it only means that you’re…different, that’s all."

We talked a bit more, and I found out that Bill was really cool! He and I didn’t travel in the same circles, he was a jock and I wasn’t, but like most of the kids, I had a preconceived idea about him, and they turned out to be all wrong! Bill walked me back to another table, and as we sat there I realized that he was being very attentive, something that I wasn’t used to. I was flattered of course, and without thinking about it, let him lead the conversation. Later he asked me to dance, which was a real thrill, because I couldn’t dance, and proved it by stepping on his feet a few times. Mom was talking to some guy while Joyce was dancing, and that left Bill and I together, just two friends that happened to be together. As the night went on Bill and I tried dancing a few more times, and each time I got better, but there was something else about having his arm around my waist, something that made me feel safe. Mom and I went home about midnight, and I saw mom smile when Bill took us both by the arm and walked us to the car.

I went to my room to get undressed after mom unzipped my dress, and after washing up I went to bed, wondering how I could have been so wrong about Bill. In the morning I wore the shorts and a top to breakfast, then after we cleaned up I put some makeup on and brushed out my hair. I didn’t have any plans, so I started to flick on the computer when mom came in and told me that we had an errand. She drove, taking us back to the mall, but instead of going in the front, she drove around to the back! When she found the right door she rang the bell, and the same lady she talked to the day before let us in.

"Nice to see you again! If you’ll follow me, we can begin."

"What’s going on mom?"

"The shop has agreed to be your sponsor for the event honey, and she only wants to make sure that you have a better than even chance of winning, since how well you do will reflect on her store."

I had visions of wearing some of that very sexy stuff I saw out front, but quickly dismissed that idea since most of it wouldn’t hide a stray hair let alone my appendage! But, mom and the lady obviously had something in mind, so I followed them to a small room. After the door was shut…

"My name is Katrina. I own the shop, and since I want you to win, I have a few things to help you. Just looking at you, I’m sure that you’ll agree with your mother and I after you see what I have for you to wear. However, you’ll have to trust me a little, can you do that?"

"Yeah, I guess, why?"

"Come over here and take your blouse and bra off, and I’ll show you."

As soon as she said that I was sure that I knew what she was going to do, and I was right, but only half right. I saw the breast forms when she opened the boxes, flesh colored, maybe a bit darker than my own skin tone. I assumed that they would fit into some kind of special bra, but I didn’t care, since I would be able to trash my birdseed ones. When she began to apply a gel to the back of the first one, I didn’t get it at first, then she set it on my chest and held it there for a moment before she let go. When it didn’t hit the floor, I realized that she had glued it to my chest! She did the other, smiling as I looked in the mirror. One was lighter in color than the other, since the first one she attached was starting to match my skin tone while the other was just beginning to change!

"These are the latest, state of the art breast forms my dear. They have a chemical in them that acts to change their color to match your skin tone exactly, and the gel I used has properties that will transmit at least some sense of touch from the form to your chest. They are brand new, and you are my very first person to try them out!"

I watched as within a few minutes they became the same color as my own skin tone, and when I touched one, I didn’t feel it at first, but with just a bit more pressure, I could feel it! They were as close to the real thing as you could get without growing your own, and I was thrilled to have them. I was about to say so when she told me to finish getting undressed!

"There is of course, a matching panty, but since my customers don’t require it, I had to send for this one special. It will enhance your ability to wear anything in the store, and provided you are careful, it should last you a very long time. Now, take this and go in there. If you need any help just yell, okay?"

I took the box and went behind the curtain, expecting to see something like the one I had seen on the net, but this one was different. It was a full panty that had padding at the hips and backside, with two thin flaps right up the back. The reason was clear enough. I looked it over, then removed my panties and stepped into it, pushing things into the right spot, then pulled it to my waist. It was tighter than a pantybrief and hugged me like a second skin. Only those two flaps left me wondering what to do, so I asked. Katrina came in, shoving the curtain aside with a wide sweep of her hand, leaving me standing there in full view of my mother. Her eyes went wide, but she remained silent as Katrina quickly used that same gel on the waist and the two flaps, tucking them into the crack in my butt! When she was done she stood back and smiled.

"I think that now you’ll be able to wear anything in the store!" As I got dressed…"I will supply all of your lingerie, that goes without saying, but I also have someone that can create whatever costumes that you might need. Just call her, and tell I sent you."

Mom took the card, and as I was busy feeling myself all over, I realized that there wasn’t any difference between myself and my sister any more! Glancing at me, mom made a motion for me to get dressed, which I did, tossing out all of the padding I had been using. Everything about me had changed, and having boobs to put in a bra felt really great! Once I was dressed, mom and I thanked her, then left the store. Mom drove around the front, then we went back inside. Strangely, mom was very silent.

"I can ask her to take them off mom. I mean, I was doing fine before, and…"

"Thank you Natalie, that’s very sweet, but no, you might as well keep them. It’s just that you looked so much like a girl that all I can see is losing my son to this!" Mom looked at me, then said, "I guess this is what you always wanted, but I was afraid to admit that, even to myself. No, you keep them on. But I want you to be just like all of the other girls in the way you act, walk, talk and so on. Nothing less will do now that you’re…visually complete."

We bought some more panties and bras, plus some shoes and shorts, then we went home. As I put everything in the closet I wondered if I should tell mom what I had found out about the panty, then decided not to. She didn’t need to know, and I didn’t plan on using it anyway. But I did try on several of Audrey’s swimsuits, even her bikini. I put my shorts back on, but kept the bikini top, and went to tell mom that I would be on the porch. After popping a soda, I walked outside and sat down, simply enjoying the feeling that I was finally a girl. Later, mom set my hair in rollers for my debut in school, and I put out what I was going to wear, which was the same outfit I wore the first time, including the tan sweater.

I drove myself to school, reporting to the office as I had been told, the teacher running the event not there yet, so I sat and waited. When she did arrive, and she looked at me, she did not at first believe me when I told her who I was, but eventually after she read a letter from my mother, she did, and I was given a note to give to my teachers. But since I looked so different, she had the secretary make me a new ID card, complete with the name Natalie Elaine on it with a new picture. I took it, then went to my first class, knowing that I was really going to cause a stir, if not a riot. Not because I was pretty, but because I didn’t look like me in any way.

At first all of the kids were quiet, then the teacher announced that I was one of the guys that was going to do the show, and had me stand up. Mouths hung open, mostly the guys, some of the girls smiled and a few frowned, but I managed not to faint, and after that, about the only problem I had was using the restroom, which was settled when I was told to use the one in the office. Most kids left me alone, but a few guys started yammering about me being queer or something, but that stopped immediately after Bill grabbed their ringleader by the throat and encouraged him to quit bothering me. After that happened I was able to use the girls restroom without any hassle, although others couldn’t. Some of the other guys that were chosen tried coming to school as girls after they saw me try it, but most, while doing their best, just couldn’t hack it, and quit, except for two others.

Emily and Nancy, who were actually Emile and James, both looked spectacular, and neither of them gave any sign that they had ever been boys. Nancy had her nails done perfectly and her long brown hair, once in a ponytail, was set free and hung down her back. Emily was smaller than Nancy and I, a petite blond with a bubbly personality and a bright smile, wore a low cut top on her first day, and like me, she had what appeared to be a pair of boobs! That confused a lot of people, especially the guys, but the girls all seemed to take to her like she was one of them! I had to wait almost a week before I felt that I was accepted by the girls, and I’m sure that Emily felt the same way. But the biggest rumor around had it that Bill and I were a couple, simply because he stopped some fools from bothering me! I didn’t expect to be asked out since everyone knew who I really was, and while the rumor was nice, it wasn’t true, and I didn’t expect to it become true.

After that first day at school, mom showed me how to do my own hair, insisting that a girl my age would know how, then quit helping me. The only time she told me to change was when I wore an ultra short skirt. I was trying to get her attention, and succeeded when she almost exploded, seeing as how I couldn’t even bend over in that tiny skirt. I changed, but that night she and I had our first fight. Mom was ranting about almost everything, including me, but I couldn’t figure out why she was so mad! I had hoped that after I started dressing everyday that she and I would find things that brought us closer together, and when that didn’t happen, I wore that skirt to get her attention. I felt…left out I guess. There was just the two of us, but I felt as if she had stranded me, leaving me to figure out what to do as a girl, and without her help, I knew that I would fail, regardless of the panty and the boobs. I was ready to quit, unable to go on like that when…

"Sit down Natalie, please." I sat at the table, then…"I’m sorry honey, I’m very angry, and I’ve been taking it out on you. We have a situation, something that could turn out to be very ugly."

"What?"

"Your father is coming by. He says that he wants to see you."

"So? Let him!"

"You don’t understand honey, once he sets eyes on you, he’ll go ballistic, and there’s no telling what he’ll do!"

I had a simply grand idea, so…"It’s okay mom. Tell him to come and visit. I can guarantee that he won’t bother either of us!"

"And just how are you going to manage that?"

"Remember Bill? Joyce’s son? I’ll ask him to be here! He’ll do it for me if I ask him, and besides, there’s a rumor going around that he and I are…a couple. It’s not true, but…"

"But it might come true unless you and that boy mountain aren’t careful?"

Ignoring her question, "Should I ask him?"

Mom nodded her head yes, and told me that dad would be there that Saturday in the early afternoon. The next day I asked Bill to be there, explaining why I needed him, then, when he said yes, I excitedly kissed him on the cheek! That startled both of us, and blushing, I ran to my next class, leaving him standing there. I didn’t know then and still don’t know why I kissed him like that, but it didn’t seem wrong at the time. The only problem was that the school magpie saw me do it, and instantly began to fuel the rumors about Bill and I. All he and I could do was ignore it the best we could. On Saturday morning I told mom that I could dress as a boy if she wanted me to, but she said no, so I went to my room to get ready. My father, that swell guy that left mom and I stranded and alone when I was just a kid was coming to see me? Mom and I both had the notion that he should get want he wanted, so I started with a bubblebath. When I stepped out, my skin was as smooth as I could make it, with no stray hairs, and after using the skin lotion I had become fond of, my skin also felt silky soft. What to wear wasn’t a problem, since mom told me what she wanted me to wear. Dad was going to have a cow when he saw me, but since I had not seen him since I was six, I really didn’t care! I picked up the thong panties, my only pair, and pulled them on, knowing full well what the result would be.

A lacy white bra that was both padded and uplifting, a waist cincher, then tan pantyhose, and finally the dress. It was a simple sheath style pullover dress in red, but with the low neckline, the twin straps to hold it up, and the fact that it was at mid thigh on me, would make it clear to my father just what my status was, and there wouldn’t be any way he could deny it, or make me change. What had started out as a charity show was turning into a life changing series of unrelated events! Not that I was complaining, but I knew it when mom stared at me when she saw me in the dress. Bill arrived about eleven, and when he saw me, a smile came to his face, and that made me feel really nice, and extremely awkward at the same time. He and I went out back, Bill trailing me in the wake of my perfume, my butt swaying back and forth as I walked. It wasn’t intentional, only the result of having a bigger butt and hips, but I didn’t mind that either. Bill and I sat side by side, just talking, when the patio door opened and mom walked out with my father.

Bill put his hand over mine as we turned to look.

"Matt, this is Bill, Joyce’s son, and this is Natalie."

"Where’s Chuck? He was supposed to be here!"

"Chuck doesn’t live here any more Matt, Natalie does."

"Natalie? Who’s Natalie? Where’s Chuck?!"

"I’m not Chuck any more, I’m Natalie now." Bill kept his hand over mine, firmly pressing down. "As you can see, there’s been a small change in how I live my life."

Dad stared at me, then at Bill, saw his hand over mine, then back at mom. "Our son is a queer?! What the hell is going on here?"

Bill stood up but didn’t move any closer, his face set, still looking very calm, but I felt it when he squeezed my hand. "Natalie is not queer as you put it sir, she is a girl, a classmate, and my friend, so it might be better if you resist the urge to call her names. I don’t like it."

My dad stood there a minute, his face turning a bright red, and I thought he was going to be stupid enough to hit one of us, but his eyes never left Bill, and he got the message that it might not be the most productive thing he could have done. He visibly regained his composure, then tried to get mom to go in the house with him, but mom said no, and sat next to me instead. That left him with only three choices. He could stand there, sit with us, or leave. He didn’t have any other options, and he knew it.

"Where is Audrey? She was supposed to be here!"

"Audrey declined the chance to see you. She stayed at the college instead." Mom sounded…elated?

"So! Audrey doesn’t want to be here, and my son is a…is now wearing dresses?"

"Natalie is a girl now, and nothing can change that, so yes, Natalie is now wearing dresses, but she is no longer your son. She carries your gene’s, but you gave up the right to call her your child long ago, when you ran off with that woman. So, since you have played no role in raising our children, maybe you should just leave! Maybe, in another 15 years or so, you’ll finally get it!"

Dad took a step towards mom, his fist rolled into a ball, but Bill was standing in front of him almost instantly, nose to nose with him, solid, unmoving, not smiling. Dad swore and went in the house, with Bill following him until he went out the front door. When he returned, he sat next to me again.

"He wasn’t happy."

"He left when Natalie was very young, and we haven’t heard from him since! His wife, the woman he ran off with is divorcing him, so I think he came back to see if we could get together again. I told him no on the phone, but he wanted to see his son, and I gave in. Natalie was here instead, and you made it clear that you weren’t going to let him hurt any of us, so of course he was unhappy!"

"I didn’t do much Ma’am."

"You do realize that you were holding Natalie’s hand the whole time?"

"I was?"

With a wink at us, mom left and went in the house, leaving Bill and I alone once again. He sat there looking at me, a grin on his face. Then he calmly asked me if I wanted to take in a show that afternoon, and maybe later, some dinner! After what he had done for us, I couldn’t say no. When I told mom, Bill was still holding my hand. The show was okay, the dinner fine, but over dinner…

"Those rumors about us" he said.

"Yeah, the rumors. I heard that we’re a couple."

"Would that be so bad? I mean…nobody thinks of you as anything but a girl now, so…"

"Bill, I’m not a girl, and everybody knows that! What do you think would happen if we made the rumor true? That one or both of us is crazy?"

"Maybe, maybe not, but for me, I couldn’t care less what people think! Hell, most of them think I’m some hulking mean ass, which isn’t true, but since I can’t change that, I don’t try. I make it work to my advantage Natalie! Just like we could work this to our mutual advantage!"

"So you’re asking me to be your girlfriend?!"

Bill and I talked about it a lot more, but in the end I didn’t say no. The following Monday I and the other "new girls" began practicing, walking on stage, standing so the props could be marked and so on. The order of appearance would be by a drawing, which put me as the last contestant, then we were assigned a color to wear using the blind draw system, although there were only red, black, white, yellow, blue and green to chose from. To my very great relief, I drew red, which meant that all of my costumes would be that color. Since there were 30 of us and only six colors, there would be five of each. The judging would start out by eliminating one girl from each color group until it was down to one each, then for the final judging, one would be named the winner, with each of the others named to a "court" of sorts.

The costumes were very specific. The first was a business suit, then the swimsuit, followed by a cocktail dress. The most daring was the lingerie portion, then lastly, a bridal, prom or very fancy type gown. None of the outfits presented a problem for me of course, only walking on stage in my underwear sounded iffy. Emily, who I viewed as my greatest threat, was well entrenched as a girl, and had made it clear to everyone that she had no intention of going back to being a boy; plus, she was dating! Some of the others, most of whom I had seen dressed as girls once in a while, while knowing well in advance about all of the costumes required, didn’t want to appear in the lingerie portion. That caused a big stink, and in the end, the lingerie was eliminated rather than lose contestants, but it was replaced by requiring another round, but wearing a different swimsuit.

Mrs. Svenson, the owner of the lingerie shop, mom, and I all sat down and planned each outfit in great detail, then we started to assemble all of them for fittings. The first swimsuit was a maillot, and fit like a second skin. I wore sheer to the waist pantyhose and red heels with it. Mom said it was scary just how feminine it made me look. Since I had wore a waist cincher or corselet every day, my waist had trimmed down a little, and even without it, I did have a modest shape, and in the skin tight suit, I was very glad of that! The cocktail dress was satin and chiffon, low cut and short, strapless, and also fit tightly. My business suit was tailored to fit, with a short bolero jacket over a plain white silk blouse with a straight skirt, my only concession to jewelry on the jacket a small flag pin for the FDNY. Then came the dress. Mrs. Svenson had ordered it especially for me, and when I saw it, I gasped. It was a wedding dress, but in a very soft red! Set with baby pearls, lace netting and satin, it was a magnificent gown that I couldn’t wait to try on!

But before I was allowed to do that, I was told to strip, then I was handed high cut red satin panties to put on, which was followed by a red corset! Mom tightened the laces as tight as I could stand, then, before I could do thing, she shoved small uplift pads under my boobs! I had plenty of cleavage after that, believe me! The red hose were fastened to the garters, and finally, the dress was pushed over my head. It took all three of us to get me into it, but when mom zipped it up and I stepped into my shoes and looked in the mirror, I was lost for words! The dress was red of course, but a pale red that let the pearls shine in the light, and the sheer lace on the short sleeves merely made my arms look smaller! Once I was undressed and changed into my own clothes, the three of us took everything to the car in preparation for the show.

On the day of the show I was very nervous, yet ready for whatever happened. I had a small room to change in, so I undressed to put the swimsuit on. Mom was there with Mrs. Svenson who sprayed my butt and boobs with cooking spray! She said it would make the suit stay in place, like skin! The auditorium was crowded, the music was playing, then we heard the announcer call the first name. Watching, I could see that everyone had done a marvelous job, and virtually all of them looked very convincing. Then it was my turn. I was scared to death, but I felt the hand on my back, and with a gentle shove, I was out on stage. The outfit I had on was like a swimsuit except that it had glitter all over the bright red material. Nude hose covered my legs, making them shiny and smooth, the red heels shaping my legs. The tiara on my head glittered with rhinestones as the lights fell on me. I had no choice but to do my best, and strutted out to center stage with a big smile on my face. I posed this way and that as the camera flashes lit up in the audience. The music played as I walked around, then I moved to a smaller stage, stepped up and stood there smiling as the other girls came out.

After the applause, we filed off stage to change, mom using a damp washrag to clean the spray off before I changed into the business suit, and once again waited my turn on stage. Then came the cocktail dresses and our "other" swimsuit. Mine was a red bikini, high cut on the panty, low cut on the bra, then I was backstage to change into the bridal gown. Once again, it took all three of us to get me dressed, but as good as I knew I looked, in each case, Emily had shown just as much cleavage, hip, smile and femininity as I had, and she was better looking besides. When I did walk on stage I could hear the people clapping and yelling, some whistles and hoots, and that made me feel better about my chances at winning, and although I started this because I simply wanted to dress like a girl, I found myself wanting to win, and Emily was the main competition.

We were all on stage as the announcer joined us to name the finalists. Like in any beauty contest, those named first would be on the court, the last one the winner.

"Our first winner is…"Michael, Valerie Hudson!" Then he went on to name the others. "Jeffrey, Kimberly Ashton. David, Carol Frenton, Henry, Emily Stickney, and our big winner is…Charles, Natalie Benson!"

To the thunderous applause, I accepted the crown and scepter I was handed, then made the walk down the pulpit stage and back, standing with the others for pictures. Then Bill, followed by five other guys walked out who then lifted their arms to walk us off stage. I almost made it off stage when Bill put his arm around me, leading me to a small alcove.

"I told you that you were going to win, didn’t I?"

Unable to talk, he wiped away a tear in my eye, then put a hand on each side of my face, drew me closer, and kissed me. When I broke away, I saw Emily, Valerie, and Kim all being held by someone, and smiled at Bill. Mom showed up and pried Bill away, taking me to the room so I could change, but the Principal came running up, a paper in his hand.

"I need you on stage, so stand right here until I announce you."

Waiting, I heard him tell everyone that I was going to give the results for the amount of money being donated to charity, then, when he called my name I walked back on stage, took the paper, and walked to the point of the stage, prepared to just read the results, but I didn’t…

"I want to thank all of you for not only participating, but allowing us to do this. As you all saw, everyone went to great lengths to live up to the spirit of this show, and while I’m sure none of us expected to see so many beautiful boys, we all know what makeup can do!" That drew some laughter. "I would like to ask my court to join me, so we can jointly thank all of you." One by one they filed on stage, unsure of what I was going to do or say, but stood smiling just in case. "We raised $40,345 tonight, which will be donated to a charity selected by the entire student body tomorrow, but I have to add this. My experiences as a girl have shown me that this is my future, so I am personally stating that I have no intention of returning to school tomorrow as a boy. I prefer being a girl, and obviously, you think so too!" Turning to the court, I asked without words, and Kim, Emily, and Valerie joined me, all saying that they too were going to remain girls.

As one, we stood there listening to the applause, blinded by the flash of various cameras, still smiling until we walked off stage for the last time. When I got to the room to change, mom, Mrs. Svenson and Bill were all there, and all of them were smiling.

"I didn’t have any doubt Natalie, but now everyone knows, don’t they?"

"Yup" I said as I looked right at Bill, "and I hope they all agree!"

"They already do" said Mrs. Svenson, "Natalie, how can it be any other way? After what you girls did out there tonight?!"

"Bill" mom said, "git! She’ll be out shortly."

I removed the gown, ready to put my jeans on, but mom gave me a red mini dress, telling me that I would have to change anything else, so I slipped it on, smiled, touched up my lipstick, kissed mom and hugged Mrs. Svenson before I left, telling mom not to wait up. I took Bill’s hand as we walked out, confident that I had crossed the last hurdle in my trek to become a girl, and by the way Bill was looking at me, he thought so too.

 

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© 2001 by Janet Stickney. All Rights Reserved. These documents (including, without limitation, all articles, text, images, logos, compilation design) may printed for personal use only. No portion of these documents may be stored electronically, distributed electronically, or otherwise made available without express written consent of the copyright holder.
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