The Scholarship

by

Julie O.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty

Sunday morning, I watched as Sam and Mom pulled out of the driveway on their trip to Philadelphia. They told me that they would call when they reached their hotel. I would miss them, but I was happy that they were getting some time together. I knew Mom was nervous about meeting Sam's family. I also wondered how they would react to me.

I read the paper until it was time to go to work. We were still busy due to the prom. We were also getting a lot of business due to weddings. We didn't deal in bridal clothing, but we got a lot of business from the guests, mothers of the bride and groom, and so on. It was fun helping customers pick out outfits.

Mel told me that she'd watched the movie that Mrs. Lincoln was in. She said that she'd been searching the Internet auction sites to see if she could find anything from Mrs. Lincoln's career, as she thought it could be a cool gift.

After work, I drove home and pulled into our driveway. I went into my house and changed into something more casual. I slipped on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and my sandals. I packed a small overnight bag and grabbed my clothes for school on Monday. I always felt a little funny when I stayed at someone's home as a guest. Additionally, this was the first time I had done it as Erika. Part of me felt that I was imposing on their privacy; however, I felt comfortable staying with Cat and Terri.

I walked over to their house. I still felt a bit uneasy when I crossed the lawn between our homes. I stopped and stared at the spot where the attack had taken place for a second and then continued over to their house.

Terri was waiting and she welcomed me inside. I knew she'd seen me stop, but she didn't say anything about it. I took my stuff upstairs into Cat's room.

She was on the computer, trading instant messages with Matt. "Hey, sorry I didn't hear you come in."

"Don't worry about it, say hi to Matt for me."

"Will do, just put your stuff over on that bed. Let me say goodbye to Matt."

"No need," I replied. I put my bag down and sat on the bed. I had also brought my own pillow. I could sleep on most beds if I had my favorite pillow. When Mom and I drove across the country from San Diego, I brought my own pillow. We've all got our own quirks!

"I was getting ready to say goodbye anyway, you want to help us get dinner ready?" she asked.

I nodded and we headed downstairs. "So, how's he doing?"

"Great. He just rented his tux. I can't believe that the prom is only two weeks away."

"Actually, less than two weeks," I answered with a smile

Terri put us both to work. Cat worked on the salad while I cut up green beans.

"I saw you pause out in the yard, Erika, and I have an idea that I want to run by you. How'd you feel if we planted a tree or something in that spot? That way it could be a place for life and renewal instead of a place of bad memories," suggested Terri

Mom and I were only renting the house. However, Sam liked the property and they'd decided to make an offer on it and that was fine with me. It really felt like home now. "That'd be really nice."

"Great! I'll talk to Jill and Sam when they get back, and we can pick something nice out."

We had a very pleasant dinner. Terri really enjoyed cooking, it wasn't a task to her, more a relaxation. We went for a walk after dinner. Our neighborhood bordered on a large wooded area. As we walked by, we saw a couple of white-tailed deer run across the road ahead of us. I think I was the only one who found this cool. I was able to get a photo of them, before they ran back into the woods.

When we got home, Mom called and told us that they'd gotten into Philadelphia. The trip was uneventful. She gave me the phone number of the hotel.

Later that evening Cat and I were sitting upstairs in her bedroom. The nice thing about our friendship was that anything was fair game. We could talk about anything and we knew that we could trust each other to keep it private.

"I think that if you win the scholarship that you should think about going to college outside of Golden Hill," suggested Cat.

"Why? Dewey's a great school, and I can keep my job."

"It has nothing to do with the quality of education at Dewey. You're sort of sheltered here. No one cares that you're TS. Personally, I know that is great, but we both know that it isn't necessarily the case elsewhere. It might be a good confidence builder to live elsewhere after you've had the surgery."

"That's something to think about." I liked the idea of living in Golden Hill, but I also wanted to see the world. My trip to New York City had whetted my appetite for traveling again.

"Anyway, you have plenty of time to think about it. I'd suggest you stay here until after your surgery. Does the idea of getting the operation concern you?" asked Cat.

"Yes, a bit - well, make that a lot! I know that it's pretty major surgery, and that things can go wrong. But it's also a my only chance to become whole."

"I understand. I'd do it too, if I was in your shoes," she remarked. She then stared at my feet. "Although, not those shoes!"

Cat was referring to my bunny slippers. "Jealous?" I asked, as I held my feet out and wiggled them.

"You're the first person I've known to actually wear those. And to think, I actually thought you had class!" We both began to laugh.

I looked down at the slippers and spoke to them in a comforting voice. "Don't listen to her, girls."

"Oh, God! Don't tell me you actually named them? You really are deranged!"

"Of course I didn't name them; they already had names when I got them."

We both started laughing so hard that we were crying. Terri looked in to see what was going on.

"Mom….Erika's bunny slippers have…. names!" Cat barely was able to speak due to laughing.

"That's nice, dear. Just as long as they're housebroken," replied Terri with a straight face.

Needless to say, that Cat and I didn't get much sleep that night. Every time we almost calmed down, one of us starting giggling and making some silly joke. Still that night marked another milestone in my progression towards becoming whole. I knew that Cat totally accepted me as a girl and in many ways as a sister.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-One

During lunch we talked about prom. Kristen had made dinner reservations for all eight of us. Our party would be Kristen and Alex, Tracy and Mike, Cat and Matt, and Laura and I. We'd invited Caroline and Paul, but they had already made other plans. They were going out with a group from the school paper. Kristen had also reserved a limo for the eight of us. She really wanted to make it a night to remember. Of all my friends, Kristen would have enjoyed the trip to NYC the most. She loved style.

It was less than two weeks to the big event, and I was as caught up in it as any other girl at school. Many of the girls had picked up their dresses at the shop. I was pleased with the way I looked in mine. As I was still new to being a girl, I didn't think about making an appointment at the salon until Cat reminded me. Thankfully, they were able to reserve me an appointment the morning of the prom.

I knew that some of the girls were still a little uneasy with Laura and I going together as a couple. No one said anything, but you could sense it. I still found it interesting that there was still some uneasiness over gay or lesbian dating, but none over the contestants dating guys. I was so happy to be going to the prom with Laura, knowing how much we were in love, that I didn't care what others thought.

After school, I swung by the display and saw that no one had dropped out. It really looked like we were all going to make it to the end. We were all a bit curious about what the outcome would be.

While I was standing there, Ms. B came by and asked how I was doing.

"Good, thanks. I haven't gotten any more threatening letters. Maybe Marlene scared him off."

"I hope so, but I'd be shocked if he gave up so easily."

I stared at the pictures for a second, "You know, they don't even look like us anymore."

"Yes, you've all made some great strides since September. Even those who didn't make it this far have changed for the better."

"Not everyone," I added softly, referring to Jason, who had only been a contestant for a few days.

"True, but he was the exception."

I excused myself and headed to the parking lot to meet Cat and Laura. I thought about what Ms. B had said.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Two

I want to jump ahead to Tuesday evening. I went over to my house after dinner. After checking the mail and picking out my clothes for school Wednesday, I called Sandra Plummer, the woman I'd met in Spencer's the previous Friday. We had traded e-mails, and she said that she'd be home Tuesday evening.

I was a bit nervous when I first called her. I had so many questions and I was afraid that she wouldn't want to hear them all. I know this was dumb. She'd contacted me because she wanted to help me.

I brewed up a mug of black spice chai tea and took out the phone number she'd given me. The phone rang a few times before she answered it. After the standard small talk we began to talk about real issues. I found that she had as many questions for me as I had for her, so we agreed to alternate. We also agreed that it was impossible to cover everything in one evening. She told me that she wanted us to become good friends.

"So, have you had the surgery?" I asked.

"Yes, I had it two years ago. I needed it to feel whole, although I know several girls who haven't had it and never plan to."

"I want to get it, I'm like you. I need to feel whole and I hate doing things half-way. So, do your friends there know that you're transgendered?"

"Hey, we agreed we alternate," she replied with a laugh.

"Sorry, I just have so much I want to know."

"No need to apologize. First, I am not the answer-lady. I can only tell you my own experiences. You'll need to find your own path. Now, I'll answer that last question but then it's my turn. I don't advertise the fact that I'm transgendered, but I don't lie to people either. I'm dating a man, and he knows that I was born male. I think that you need to tell anyone you date the truth."

"That makes sense."

"Okay, now it's my turn. When did you first know that you were TS?"

"Boy, you start off with a good one. I guess I'd had feelings when I was younger, but I hid them and forced them away. I guess growing up without a father I wanted to act as the man of the family. I forced myself to try to act as normally as possible, and fought any feelings that I was anything but a man. I even tried to convince myself that I'd entered the competition just for the scholarship. Soon I began to realize that it was much deeper, but I figured that I could hold it off. Then everything began to fall into place. I felt so comfortable and well…normal. I knew that I was different and that it was okay. Mom didn't hate me and my friends at school seemed to like me, and my gender didn't matter."

"So, did you know before you were attacked?"

"I forgot that you've talked to Ms. B. Yes, I knew before the assault. It just reinforced my decision. In fact, it made me feel better about myself."

"Why was that? Because it was more socially acceptable for a woman to be raped than a man?"

I was silent for a second. I was little pissed about the question, but as I thought about it I could see that there was no malice intended, "Maybe. In some ways the attack reaffirmed me as a woman. I've felt a bit guilty for thinking that way."

"I'm sorry, Erika, that came across a bit heavier than I wanted to be. I know that you've been through a lot, and I don't want to bring up bad memories." From the tone of her voice, I knew that she was sincere.

"It's okay. I've found that talking about it is better than keeping it locked inside. I did worry that some people would see my desire to transition as a result of the rape. Fortunately, I knew the truth and it was clear to me that this was my right path in life. When my friend Caroline told me that she was TS and told me everything going through her mind I knew that I was TS too. As she described her feelings it was like she was reading my mind," I answered.

"Fair enough, okay your turn!"

I asked her about hormones and their effects on her. She was very detailed in her descriptions. I got excited thinking about it.

She then asked me about my plans for after school. I told her about wanting to become a teacher. She said that was great. I found out that Sandra worked in the state government. She worked on the staff of a state legislator.

After talking for over an hour, we called it quits for the night. I thanked her again and we made an agreement to talk once a week.

Back over at Cat's house, we talked about the conversation up in her room. I had changed into my pjs and Cat was in a pair of shorts and a large oversized t-shirt. Of course, I was wearing the bunny slippers, and no... they really didn't have names!

"So what's Sandra like?" asked Cat.

"Like an older version of you. She knows how to ask the right sort of question to make you think."

"I thought she looked intelligent!"

I tossed a pillow at her and she responded with a counterattack. That went on for several minutes and stopped only because we were laughing so hard.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Three

As usual, Laura picked us up for school. The sky was dark and it looked like it would start raining any second. Laura was very interested in my conversation with Sandra, as she was with all aspects of my transition. We also talked a little about the sleepover at Cat's house.

We just got into school when it started to rain. The nice thing about San Diego was that the weather was so consistent, but, I'm not complaining, I liked the changes in seasons, although winter was on the bottom of my list.

Ms. B saw us as we walked in and she motioned me over to her. "Hi, Erika, I just wanted to let you know that there'll be a meeting at lunch today. I have an announcement to make."

"Okay, usual room?" I asked. I knew that asking about the reason for the meeting was pointless.

"Yes, see you there. By the way I got an e-mail from Sandra Plummer last night and she really enjoyed talking with you."

"I like her a lot too," I replied. I had plenty of questions for Ms. B. "So, after graduation will I be initiated into the club?"

Ms. B just smiled and walked away.

I ran into Caroline and we talked about what might be the reason for the meeting. We'd both confirmed that no one had dropped out, so it couldn't be that. We'd figured that we would find out in a few hours.

By lunch it was raining even harder. They canceled all practices. However, Coach Chambers asked me to stick around and help her get caught up on the track admin. I agreed, plus it would give me a chance to talk to her.

We arrived at the meeting. Everyone showed up and was equally curious about the reason for the meeting. Denise's hair was back to blonde - make that white. She told us that the Downfall was booked through the summer. They even were going to play some places on the Jersey shore. They d be the opening group, but she said it was a great start.

"So, do you think you'll go to college, or are you going to stay in the band?" I asked Denise.

"Good question. I want to study music, but playing in the band is so much fun. I just might ride this wave as long as it will take me. However, if I do win the scholarship, I'm not going to let it go to waste. There are plenty of wonderful music schools that I would love to attend."

I told her about the comments we'd heard in Spencer's about her and the band. She thought that was great. She commented that they had quite a following at Dewey.

Denise laughed. "I can't wait to tell the others in the band! They also kid me that I'm the most feminine member of the band!"

Ms. B walked in with another woman. She introduced her as Ms. Fuller and said that she was on the committee that oversaw the scholarship. Ms. Fuller looked to be was in her forties; she was wearing a tailored suit and she had her hair up in a bun. She looked very professional, but a bit stern.

"Good afternoon, girls," Ms. Fuller greeted us. "First, I want to congratulate you on making this the most successful and interesting year of the scholarship contest. I believe that this class has set a new standard for all future classes. It'll be remembered as the year that the competition began to achieve the goals set by its founder."

I sat there waiting for what she was setting us up for. I doubted she'd came here just to give us a pep talk. I also wondered what she'd meant by her last comment.

"I want to say that you are all winners for making it this far. In accordance with the original bylaws set down by our founder, I need to make the following offer. If anyone wishes to drop out at this point, they will automatically receive a scholarship in the amount of $10,000.00, to be paid in installments not to exceed $2,500.00 a year. While we would like as many contestants as possible in the competition, we don't want someone to be miserable for their prom and graduation. If you wish to drop out now, you will be rewarded for making it this far."

There was dead silence in the room. I looked around the room at each contestant. Caroline just winked at me. Denise also made eye contact and winked at me, so I knew she was staying. Ann on the other hand had her head down, as did Lisa. I wondered what was going through their minds. Both were very competitive, but I knew how unhappy Lisa was. Then there was the enigma of Ann. I couldn't figure her out; sometimes I thought she was the third and then other times she seemed very indifferent to it all.

"Now, you don't have to make up your minds right now. The offer will stand for the rest of the year. I would like to meet with each of you this afternoon privately. Ms. Bell will give you the times. Again, thank you all for your wonderful effort."

As we walked out we were given a pass. Mine was during sixth period. I wondered what she had to say to me.

I tried to talk to Lisa, but she said that she didn't want to talk at the moment and that she'd call me that night. I gave her Cat's number.

During sixth period I went to my meeting with Ms. Fuller. The meeting was in Ms. B's office. When I arrived, she was talking to Ms. B. I was surprised to see them both laughing.

"Please sit down, Erika. It's a pleasure to meet you. Ms. Bell has been keeping us apprised of your progress. I just want to express the board's admiration for the way you've handled all the adversity that you have experienced."

"Thank you." I knew that our progress was being monitored, but it still made me feel a little uneasy.

"The reason I want to talk to you is that we're aware that you are presently in transition. We understand the financial hardship that this can cause and we are prepared to assist. While we can't pay for the entire process, we have set up a loan that your family can apply for. It has a very low interest rate; in fact, if it's paid off in five years there's no interest. Your family will be receiving the application in the next week. I'll tell you that the application is strictly a legal formality, as you've been approved already."

I sat there stunned. I was totally speechless, and it took a few moments for her words to sink in.

"This is in addition to the scholarship?" I asked

"Of course. We offer this to any contestant who is transgendered, even after they've graduated. Our founder who set up the contest understood that there would eventually be transgendered contestants. She felt that it wouldn't be right after we helped them find their true selves to abandon them and not help them become physically whole. Now we don't publicize this fact, and the contestants are only notified after they have been screened. We're not some secret organization bent on changing boys into girls. We're interested in helping people with gender issues become as whole as possible."

"I assume that I'll be required to keep quiet about this offer." Hanging around Cat all the time had improved my deductive reasoning.

"Ms. Bell said you were smart. Yes, part of the application is a requirement that you and your family keep silent about this offer. It could be easily misunderstood by less open-minded people. However, if we'd felt that we couldn't trust you then we wouldn't be making this offer."

"Thank you very much. This takes a huge weight off my back!" I gave her and Ms. B a big hug.

"Now there is one last thing, we will expect you someday to assist future contestants, much like Sandra Plummer. I don't think that will be a problem for you."

"Erika wants to teach high school when she graduates college, so she already wants to help others," interjected Ms. B.

"I would be honored to help future students," I added.

"Excellent! Well you'll be receiving the loan application in the mail next week and your family can call us with any questions." explained Ms. Fuller

I thanked them again and headed back to Mr. Kline's room. I was walking three feet off the ground, as I was so happy.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Four

After school, I went to Coach's office to plug in track data. I was amazed by the amount of paperwork in track and field. Laura told me she'd meet me when I was done. She had to work on grad night and some final issues on the prom.

I went to work on the data entry. Coach was in and out of her office the first hour. During the second hour, she sat at her desk and we had a chance to talk. Initially we just made small talk, but then we got into some deeper issues.

"I've asked other people this question and I still haven't a good answer. Why are people in this town so accepting of transgendered girls?" I asked as I entered in the high jump statistics.

"It has taken time to reach this level of acceptance. Each year we've made progress. First, we have a faculty that supports the contest and the contestants. We ensure that all students treat each other respectfully. Next, we've gotten important people in town to respond positively to the competition. Mrs. Lincoln initially pressured many businesses to give discounts, and they soon saw that they gained more business than they lost. We now have businesses applying to us to get into the program. The school helped by treating the contestants, with respect. We don't design tasks to humiliate the contestants and we have made every effort to make them a full part of campus life. When some girls like you came out as transgendered, it wasn't considered a big deal. The community has just had eighteen years to slowly change."

"Yet, there is still some uneasiness about gay and lesbian students here at Central," I remarked as I shifted to the relay team times.

"True, but it's improving. It takes time to change people's minds and attitudes. We've just gotten permission from the school board to set up a LGBT-Straight Student Alliance group for next year. I'll be the faculty advisor. I've been pushing for it for the past five years."

"Cool, they had a group like that at my old high school," I added. I checked the numbers before shifting to the sprint times.

"Were you a member?" she asked with a smile.

"No, I was too far in denial then," I answered truthfully.

"I expect that it'll take some time to build up a membership. But it will be worth it," she explained

"While we are on the topic of the school attitudes towards gays and lesbians, do you think that there will be any backlash against Laura and I for going to the prom together?" I asked.

"No, I don't see it as problem for you two. First off, you have many great friends who love and support both of you. I imagine that there are some in school who may still see you as a boy, and are in denial about the two of you. Laura is also very respected in school. Still there are some who won't be pleased, but they might as well get used to it," she said.

"Do you think that there will be any other same-sex dates at the prom?" I asked.

"Excluding contestants, I don't think so, but I wouldn't be surprised if there are some in the coming year. Personally, I don't think that it'll be that big a deal after the initial shock wears off. But, I fully understand the fears of being made an outcast in school. In some ways you two may be trendsetters," she remarked

"I appreciate your confidence in us!"

Just then there was a knock on the door and Laura walked in, "We got done early, anything I can do to help?" she asked.

We caught her up on the conversation. As expected she was very interested in joining in discussion of the subject.

"I know some girls who are very uneasy about my sexuality. There are a few who feel that our going to the prom together will become a distraction and ruin their night." I liked the sarcastic tone in which she said 'ruin their night' like we weren't supposed to have fun too.

"I don't care about them, it's our night too!" I replied.

We also talked about the possibility of the Rev stirring things up. Coach felt that if he tried something it would be more sneaky and underhanded. "I think he might try something during graduation."

I hoped she was wrong. I just wanted to get on with my life and I didn't want to be a distraction.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Five

We met Cat, Caroline, and Paul at Guido's. We talked about school and the prom. Caroline and I brought up the buyout offer.

"Do you think anyone will take it?" asked Paul.

"Maybe, I know that Lisa isn't that happy," I replied.

"Ann's a hard read too," added Caroline

"What about Denise?" asked Paul

"I used to think that she was just doing it as a goof, but I'm not so sure now. She has become really focused, and she's really serious about her music. I think the competition has really helped her. I'd be shocked if she dropped out," noted Caroline.

I wondered if Denise was the third. It didn't seem as shocking an idea as before.

The only other thing of note that night was that Lisa didn't call. I hesitated about calling her, and when I did, her mom said that she didn't want to talk right now. I understood and told her mom to pass on that I would support her decision either way.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Six

Thursday arrived with a continuation of the rain. The weather guessers said that it was supposed to start clearing up late that night. I kinda dreaded going to school, only because I expected to see our numbers decreased. As usual, I had mixed feelings about the buyout offer. I thought it was cool that everyone still in the contest would get something. But I also felt a loss for each candidate who quit. Still, I should know how important it is to be true to yourself and not worry what others think. I'd still miss them.

It wasn't a good sign as I approached the display case and saw that it was open. They were rearranging the remaining pictures. I then saw that Ann's picture was missing. It hit me that I didn't even know her male name. I was pleased to see that Lisa's picture was still there, as was Denise's photo. So we were now down to four.

Between the weather and the fact that we'd lost another contestant, I was feeling a bit down. I arrived in homeroom and told Cat that Ann was out.

"So what's Ann's male name?" I asked Cat.

"It's Andrew," answered Cat. "I'm amazed that he lasted this long."

I hadn't been that social with Ann, and I can't even say that she was a friend; if it wasn't for the competition, I wouldn't even know her, I mean him. Still, to go this long and then drop out was a bit sad.

"Don't get too down, after all he did get a pretty good scholarship," added Cat.

"I know." That also narrowed the possibilities for the third. Was it Denise or Lisa?

Work was fun that night. Even with the rain we were busy. Mel said that she wanted to show me something when the crowds slacked off.

"I bought this on an Internet auction website," she told me, as held out a black and white photo. It was a publicity shot from the movie we'd seen Mrs. Lincoln in. The photo was from the scene in the bar and it showed both Mrs. Lincoln and Violet.

"This is really cool. How much did it cost?" I asked.

"Only a few dollars," smiled Mel. "The shipping cost more."

"So, what are you going to do with it?" I asked.

"I want to give it to Mrs. Lincoln, but I'm afraid that she might take it the wrong way. I don't want her to think that I'm making fun of her."

"I think that she'll know that you mean well and that it's because you think well of her," I said.

"When does your mom get back from Philly?" she asked.

"Either Saturday or Sunday. They might be delayed due to the weather."

"How's it going with his family?" asked Mel.

"From what she told me, pretty good. Apparently Sam's family is very excited about the wedding and they don't mind the trip way up here."

"Way up here? You make it sound like we're in the middle of nowhere!" replied Mel with mock indignation.

"According to Sam, they think he lives in the wilderness. I used to think that this town was in the middle of nowhere myself."

"Ahhh… but now you know differently."

"Yes, we're just south of nowhere," I replied with a laugh.

"How do they feel about you?" asked Mel.

"From what Mom has told me, they're anxious to meet me," I replied

"That's good."

Mel decided to get the photo framed before she gave it to Mrs. Lincoln. The rest of night was dead, and I think we had one customer the last hour. It was raining even harder than before, and it looked like it had no intention of stopping soon.

I was careful driving home and pulled into our driveway. Between our houses there was a small river flowing. After I checked our mail and grabbed my clothes, I took the long way over to Cat's. I was afraid that I'd sink down if I tried the short cut. I was just about to Cat's house when I looked over and saw something white near the spot where Jason had attacked me. I couldn't quite make it out.

When I arrived at Cat's house, I asked Terri if they had a flashlight. I told her about seeing something between our homes. She got the flashlight and put on her rain gear. Cat joined us and we went out. There was a white sign posted. We couldn't read it, but I got a sickening feeling in my stomach. Terri waded over and looked at the message. She came back and said that she was going to call the police.

"What does it say?" I asked.

"Something to the effect that, on this spot an innocent young man was framed," she answered in a disgusted tone.

I could tell by her voice that she was leaving something out. I knew that it must have been something nasty about me.

The police said that they'd be out shortly. While we waited, she called Mom and Sam down in Philly.

The police arrived, and after taking some photographs, they took the sign down. They said they would hold it as evidence and told us to call it there were further problems. I liked the way they kept it low key, so that there would be little publicity.

I was more angry than scared. To me it was a cowardly act. It takes a really brave person to sneak into someone's yard in a storm to post an insulting sign. Sam and Mom talked to me and I assured them I was okay. Sam said he would call Marlene and tell her what'd happened.

We sat around the table and talked for a while. I had tea while Terri and Cat drank coffee. They shared my sense of outrage about the juvenile nature of the crime. I wondered if the person who had done it was the Rev or one of his followers. I hoped that it wasn't anyone from our town.

Terri told me all of what the sign said. It had gone on to say that I was a perverted freak of nature. I said I was disappointed, as I'd expected him to be more creative.

"What did you say?" asked Cat.

"It's the same exact thing that the Rev called me in all three letters," I said.

"Sounds like a connection to me," replied Sherlock Cat.

She was right. We emailed Marlene with out latest discovery. An hour later we got a reply. She said that it sounded like his sort of tactic. She told us not to worry.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Seven

Apparently, I was the only target of the Rev that night. As promised, they kept it out of the papers. I was pleased because, if it was publicity he was seeking, he'd be disappointed. The police stepped up patrols in our neighborhood. That made us all feel a little better. However, I put my worries behind me, as I was looking forward to the sleepover at Cat's that night.

Cat had decided to make it a bigger party and had also invited Kristen, Tracy, and Caroline. Tracey had to pull out, as she had to out of town for a funeral. She seemed very disappointed. Cat told the rest to come over around 8:00PM.

I helped her get ready. Cat could tell that I was a bit nervous and told me not to worry, that I was considered one of the girls.

It was still a bit cool at night, so I could still wear my pjs. Cat cringed when I told her I was wearing the bunny slippers. By 8:30 everyone was there. Everyone changed into their pjs. Kristen liked my slippers, and I asked her to point this out to Cat.

We ordered in pizza, and Terri was very patient with our noise level. I told her that she could sleep in my house that night, and she smiled and said she'd consider it.

Laura suggested that we play "Truth or Dare" and everyone reluctantly went along with her idea. Cat was up first and she selected truth.

"What's one thing that you've never told your mom?" asked Kristen.

Cat thought for a second and leaned over towards us and spoke in a low tone. "Well... she doesn't know about this." She then turned around and pulled down her shorts to expose one of her butt cheeks. There on the right check was a little tattoo of Curious George.

We all broke out laughing. "When did you get that?" asked Laura.

"When I was down in Harrisburg for the crime lab trip. I was sharing a room with a college girl, and we went out with her friends. We all got tattoos. I always liked Curious George. Besides, I'm legal. You just have to be eighteen or older,"

It was a pretty cute tattoo. We talked about whether the rest of us would get one. We had different opinions on the idea. Caroline said she would, especially if she ever got a comic strip published. Laura also said that she'd get one. Kristen was dead against the idea. I said that it would have to be something very special.

"Coach Chambers has two tattoos. She has a tiny wing on the outside of each ankle. She said she got them when she ran cross-country," I added.

"That's cool, just like Mercury!" noted Caroline.

"I guess George isn't all that curious anymore!" wisecracked Laura, and we all starting laughing again.

I was up next. I selected dare and I could tell that Laura had something planned.

"Okay, Erika here it is, you have to wear this the rest of the night," said Laura, as she handed me a black lace nightie, panty, and a matching negligee.

"They don't match my slippers!" I grumbled.

"Those are gorgeous Laura, where did you get them," asked Cat.

"From my mom's stuff, she won't miss them," answered Laura.

To be a good sport, I went into the bathroom and changed. It wasn't too revealing. I had to admit that it did feel nice. I slipped on the robe and went back out. I got plenty of whistles and was made to turn around for everyone.

Laura couldn't take her eyes off me. The girls were interested in Caroline's and my breasts. I didn't mind showing them what I had, being they were still so small. Yet they could all see some swelling and growth. Caroline was a bit more shy but she also showed hers. They were about the same size as mine.

"So, you only raided your mom's stuff just for Erika? And I thought we were friends!" joked Kristen.

"I never said that," answered Laura. "I brought stuff for everyone!"

She pulled a whole bunch of lingerie out of her bag and passed it around. I wasn't sure what I should do as the others changed. I started to get up to leave when Cat and the others stopped me.

"It's no big deal Erika. We trust you!" remarked Cat. "The same goes for you Caroline. We're all girls here!"

The others nodded in agreement and I was immediately choked up with emotion. I noticed that Caroline was also fighting back tears.

Soon we were all dressed much more sexily than before. And before any of you get evil thoughts, that's as far as we went. Sorry, no teenage orgies.

Most of the stuff she'd brought was sexy in a classy manner. She also told us that she did ask permission to borrow the stuff.

We totally forgot about the rest of the game. I think that Laura brought out the rest of the stuff so that she wouldn't have a turn. But I didn't mind, as she looked so hot in her teddy and robe.

We stayed up very late talking about topics ranging from the prom to college. I felt so close to them and we all knew that we'd stay in touch even after we headed off into our adult lives. I think we all fell asleep sometime around three.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Eight

In the morning, Terri made us a great breakfast. Of course, we changed before going downstairs. I had to admit that it had initially been difficult to fall asleep. I'd found myself caressing my nipples in the dark through the silky material. I'm sure Laura had that in mind when she selected the outfit for me.

I also looked out between our yards, and was relieved to see that there was nothing there. I hoped that it had been a one-time event.

I went over to the house and checked my e-mail. There were a few from Marlene, and one from Sandra.

Marlene said that it looked like the Rev was responsible. There was a posting on his website showing the sign. She also said that she'd be back in town the weekend of the prom, just in case something happened.

I got a call from Mom. She told me that they were on their way back and that they should get home late that evening. She was calling from the car and said they were presently passing Lansdale on the PA Turnpike heading north, which meant absolutely nothing to me. I had to check the map to see that Lansdale is a town north of Philadelphia. I told them to have a safe trip and that I was looking forward to seeing them soon.

I went back to my paper. I was on my third rewrite. Terri had been reviewing my paper for grammar and spelling mistakes. I still made a lot and it bothered me. Laura called later in the afternoon and asked if I wanted to go to the movies. She said that she had already talked to Cat. I told her yes, and I went back over to Cat's house.

"Do you think they'll be home tonight?" asked Terri.

"From what Mom said they will," I answered

"If they stop, you're more than welcome to spend the night here again," offered Terri.

"Thanks," I replied. I had already taken my stuff home, but it was nice knowing that I wouldn't have to be alone.

We had a great time that afternoon. The movie was okay and afterwards we went to the Chinese restaurant in the mall. We called up and invited Kristen, Alex, Paul, and Caroline. I love going to a Chinese restaurant with a big group. I was pleased to see Mike with Kristen and Alex. He said it was strange having a weekend without Tracey.

We all ordered different things so we could share. We talked more about the prom. The guys were moaning about the cost. Laura told them they could always split the costs like we were doing.

It was also a bit obvious that Mike was flirting with me all night. I thought it was just me at first, but Laura noticed it too. It's not like I wasn't flattered, but I wasn't about to cheat on Laura, and I liked Tracey too much. I tried to ignore it and avoid anyone getting the wrong impression.

On the way home, Laura asked me if I found him attractive.

"Yes, I do," I answered honestly.

"Good, I'm glad you didn't lie," noted Laura. "I know you like boys, and if I did too I'd probably find Mike hot myself."

"So, you don't mind boys finding you attractive?" asked Cat.

"No, not anymore. I guess it's a validation that I'm doing this right," I answered

"Hypothetical question for you, Erika," asked Laura. "Assuming the unthinkable happens and we are no longer a couple, and you met a guy who was obviously hot for you, would you tell him that you were TS?"

"Hypothetical huh? Well, are you talking about before or after my surgery?" I asked.

"Both," interjected Cat with a sly smile.

"Before the surgery I would definitely tell him, and for that matter even after the surgery," I answered

"Well, what if you knew that it would be a one night stand and that you'd never see him again?" asked Laura.

"Same answer. If he really loved me it wouldn't matter. Besides after being accused of deceiving someone, I've had a lot of time to think about this sort of thing."

"That's true," said Laura.

"So, if both you and Mike were free and available, would you go out with him?" asked Cat.

"I guess so. He's fun to be around and he's cute too," I answered.

"So, race wouldn't be a problem?" asked Cat.

"No, back in San Diego interracial dating is no big deal for most people, at least it wasn't at my school," I replied

"So, basically if it's breathing then it's fair game for you?" asked Cat

"Yes, being a bisexual and open-minded makes almost everyone a potential date," I answered laughing.

"Too bad you aren't from West Virginia, then you could include your kin in that mix," laughed Laura.

"Then she wouldn't be open minded!" added Cat laughing

"Kin?" I asked.

"It's okay, my whole Mom's whole side of the family is from there, and they've told me the best West Virginia jokes," explained Laura.

"Seriously, what is the attitude on interracial dating around here?" I asked

"To be honest, it's never been a big issue, because we haven't had a huge number of minorities," explained Cat. "I don't think that it would be a big problem in school."

"So my turn to ask a question, would either of you date someone who is a different race?" I asked.

"I don't have a problem with it," replied Cat.

"I'm not picky, you should both know that," smiled Laura.

"I think we've just been insulted," I said to Cat.

"I know we've just been insulted," agreed Cat.

We all began to laugh.

We went back to my house; they both said they'd stay with me until Mom and Sam came back. I showed them the movie with Mrs. Lincoln in it. They were both impressed.

A little after 9:30 we heard Sam's car pull into the driveway. It was good to see Mom and Sam again. Yes, I know that they were only gone a week, but I missed them! Cat, Laura, and I helped them bring their bags in. After they got settled Cat and Laura left. I thanked Cat for being such a great hostess, and I gave Laura a nice long kiss.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Sixty-Nine

Sam, Mom, and I sat down at the kitchen table. Their first concern was the Rev and his minor act of vandalism. Sam said that he had called the police and they'd told him that there wasn't much they could do. Still, the sigh made it clear that it wasn't over.

I was more concerned about Mom's visit with Sam's family. She said that they were all wonderful and had treated her very nicely. Sam said that he was amazed how well behaved they'd been, and Mom punched him in the arm.

"So I guess the million dollar question is how did they react to you having a seventeen-year-old daughter?" I asked

"Damm! I knew there was something we forgot to bring up!" exclaimed Sam with a smile.

"He gets a bit weird when he's been driving all day, doesn't he?" Mom teased. "They seemed very anxious to meet you."

"Did you tell them everything?" I asked

"Of course. There's no reason to keep it secret," added Mom.

Sam decided to let us talk and said he was going to bed. He kissed us both good night and went upstairs.

"So, it really went well?" I got up and put the kettle on.

"Better that you can imagine. Sam's family already knew all about you."

"When did he tell them?" I opened the tea box and took out a bag of black spice chai tea. Mom saw my choice and nodded.

"He talks to his sister all the time about cases. She works in the Philly DA's office and she became very interested in your case. So, when he told them how he'd met me there was no sense in hiding the truth."

"Tell me more about his family." The kettle was about to come to a boil. I always put my sugar in my mug before I pour in the water. Then I wait at least five minutes until I take out the bag. Taking it out too soon is a crime.

Mom then went over Sam's immediate family. His father was a retired Philadelphia policeman, and his mother had always been a housewife, and they now lived in New Jersey. Sam's older sister, Carla, worked as an assistant DA in Philadelphia. She's married and has two kids. He also had a younger brother named Brett, who'd just made detective in the Philadelphia PD. Brett was divorced and had no kids.

"Do you have a scorecard for me?" I asked. I added milk to my tea. The tea was very good. I think tea tastes better when there is good conversation to go along with it. Vanilla wafers also help!

"I won't even go into all his cousins and other relatives. I got lost after he introduced me to his three aunts at dinner. It will take some getting used to this sudden expansion of family. They are very close, and they're all fond of Sam."

"And meanwhile our real family doesn't even acknowledge my existence," I replied sadly.

"Well, that's not all because of you. I never was all that popular with most of them."

"Why? Because of me coming along?" I asked.

"I guess it's time to discuss this. Why don't you make us each another mug of tea and we'll have a talk," announced Mom.

I did as she said and when they were ready she began to tell me some things from her past and mine.

"First off, I've never lied to you about anything. I have just left out some parts until I felt you were ready. What I told you about your father was true. We did date and he did dump me when I got pregnant. He wanted to stay with me but he didn't want me to have a baby. He offered to pay for an abortion and I refused; then he suggested that I put you up for adoption. I couldn't do that either. I instantly fell in love with you and couldn't bear the thought of someone else raising you."

I took a long sip of tea and let her words sink in.

"When I'd met him I was working as a waitress in a strip joint. I got the job after my first year in college. I never danced or took off my clothes, even though I had the opportunity. The job paid really well, and it worked with my hours in school. My family was upset that I worked in a place like that and felt I should get a more 'respectable' job. The problem with the 'respectable jobs' was that their hours wouldn't allow me to go to college. They also paid much less money. So, I did what I thought was right."

I took another sip of my tea.

"I met your father while I was working there. He was on the football team and they came in a couple of times a week. I guess I became star struck, and I failed to see what a jerk he was until he walked away from me. I moved back home and worked out a schedule to go to school, work, and raise you. The family wasn't pleased and thought that I never should have tried to raise you. I was barely twenty when you were born, and I didn't have a husband, so in their eyes I was immoral."

I could hear the bitterness in her voice. It made me angry to hear how mean they'd been to her.

"I guess that they also looked at my behavior in high school. I hung out with a wild crowd. They were my friends and some of them led less than model lives. I know that some were into drugs, and I mean the heavy stuff. After high school some of them had some real problems. I knew that if I failed to get through college I'd end up like them," continued Mom.

"So that's why you are so anti-drug?" I asked.

Mom nodded. "I had a friend in school who was as close to me as you are with Cat. One night, she invited me to go clubbing with her; I turned her down because I couldn't skip work. She died that night in a car crash. Three other girls, all very close friends, including the driver, also died in the accident. The Highway Patrol said that they'd all been drinking and that the post mortems showed that they'd also used drugs. If I hadn't been working that night, I might have been in that car with them."

"Karma," I said softly, referring to her working that night.

"Maybe. I still carried around a lot of guilt for years. Between the accident and you arriving, my life was really turned around for the better." She then paused for a moment and then spoke softly. "I still think about them... it was such a waste."

We sat there in silence for a few moments. "Did you ever use drugs?"

Mom paused for a moment and looked me in the eyes. "Yes. I smoked pot, and I tried a few other things, but never again after that night. Their deaths scared me away from drugs."

There was a very loud silence in the room. We sat there for a long time soaking it in.

"So…. all of this combined to make our family feel that you weren't worthy of their affection?"

"I think they were further bothered by the fact that I had the nerve to graduate college and move up in life. The fact that I moved away to take a better job upset them too. Your transition was just the final straw, it gave them a solid reason to cut ties."

"Thank you for telling me all this. I love you even more, if that's even possible!"

We hugged and both of us cried softly. We held onto each other for what seemed like hours. I was so proud of her and how she'd made her life better by overcoming adversity.

"I think that's enough family history for tonight. I need to go to bed," noted Mom.

We said good night and we walked upstairs together. We hugged one last time before we went into our rooms. I was so happy that she and Sam were together. They deserved each other and deserved a happy life together. I really understood Mom better now.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy

As usual I was the first one up and was enjoying the paper at the kitchen table. I had the coffeepot ready to go for Sam. The feeder only had a few birds. They were small and brown, and most likely some sort of sparrow. I thought about last night and the prospect of becoming part of a large loving family. The idea was very appealing.

I read the local paper first. It usually didn't take that long to go through it. I always saved the NY Times for last. I looked in the editorial section and, to my horror, there was a letter from the Rev. He claimed that Jason had gotten an unfair trial, and that Jason was the victim of an immoral conspiracy, and that he'd been deceived by a deviate. The letter went on to say how he would stage a protest the week before graduation. He said that he promised to disrupt the town unless Jason was given a new trial. I looked at it and felt my rage growing. I went upstairs and e-mailed Marlene and asked her if she wanted me to mail the article to her or save it until she arrived for prom. By contacting Marlene, I felt like I was doing something.

As I went back downstairs, I heard Mom and Sam stirring. I turned on the coffee maker and the kitchen was soon filled with the aroma of fresh brewed coffee. I did like the smell, but I wasn't tempted to go over to the dark side and actually drink it!

I looked at the Rev's letter and wondered how many people would believe his lies. This was a time when life needed a fast-forward button like those on VCRs. I wanted to shift forward to see the response of the town. I figured that there'd be responses in the paper by Wednesday or Thursday at the latest. I actually hoped that maybe everyone had skipped the editorials that day.

Sam came down first and after greeting him I showed him the letter to the editor. He read it while he filled his mug with coffee. He drank it straight, no cream or sugar.

"I've already e-mailed Marlene about it. I needed to do something," I announced.

Sam nodded in approval. "Well, if he stages a protest in town he'll need a permit from city hall. They'll tell me if he does that. If he fails to get the permit, then the police can arrest him."

"How much do the permits cost?" I asked.

"No charge. They only exist so the police can plan crowd control. They also limit where he can hold his protest. Town laws require that all protests must be off school property and cannot disrupt school activities. That was put in place during the Vietnam War. The mayor at the time was worried about campus protests and the law has never been changed."

"What will happen if he applies for the permit?" I asked.

"He'll get it. He does have a constitutional right to stage a peaceful legal gathering," replied Sam.

"Thanks for the civics lesson," I said with a smile. "Can't you do something?"

"I'm only the DA, not the Attorney General," replied the Sam with a smile.

Mom came down and we caught her up on what was going on. What really got me through all this was the fact that I had such great support from my family and friends.

"So why is he attacking me on the issue of the rape, and not because of my being TS, which is obviously the real reason for his actions?" I asked.

"He can't, it would be a violation of state law. So by protesting that this is just a case of criminal injustice, he can skirt his real issue without breaking the law and he also avoids a civil rights law suit," explained Sam

"I'm not sure who I hate more right now," I replied.

As we ate breakfast, we discussed our strategy. I'd have preferred to hear about their trip, but first things come first. Just as we were cleaning up, Marlene called. She talked to Sam for nearly thirty minutes. I got to talk to her afterwards.

"Don't worry too much, I know you want this to just go away, but like all plagues this one will pass," she remarked.

"How bad will it get?" I asked.

"That's up to him. If he holds his little rally and fails to gain any support, he may just move on. These guys hate to dwell on their defeats. I'm working with some groups to conduct a counter-rally. If we can make a strong showing, he'll shift to an easier target. I don't think he knows how tough you are."

"I wish I knew myself."

"Look, Erika, I've been involved in many such cases, and I know that you can get through this."

"Thanks. I just don't want to cause any problems."

"YOU aren't causing the problems, HE is. You, Erika, are just defending yourself, remember that," she stated firmly.

She needed to speak to Sam again. This was a like a bad dream that keeps repeating. However, I wasn't going to repeat my mistakes and try to do this all on my own.

I went upstairs to get ready for work. I looked at my scar and it was barely noticeable. Too bad the rest of this wouldn't fade away. I was surprised that they were still on the phone when I came down. I was wearing a sleeveless spring dress and sandals. I didn't mind wearing dresses, now that the weather was warmer.

Mom said goodbye and hung up the phone. She let out a loud sigh.

"So what's the plan?" I asked.

"Wait and see for now. Marlene is organizing groups in support of you, but the next move is his," remarked Mom

"What about replying to his letter?" I asked.

"She said that she'd draft a reply and send it in today, we'll get a copy by e-mail," added Sam.

"Cool."

"I know this may sound corny, but have faith in the people of this community to do the right thing," continued Sam.

"I will. I just wish that he'd come out in the open and fight fair."

"It's not his style, or of those like him."

Mom let me borrow the car to go to work. I turned down their offer of a ride; I wanted them to relax at home.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-One

Work went really well, it was like a five-hour vacation from my problems. Cindy kept me busy so that I didn't have time to think about the Rev. Mel told me that the guys in the leather store said to call them immediately if he showed up here in the store. I thanked her but said that was very unlikely.

We stayed pretty busy all day. Girls were coming in to pick up their prom dresses, and we were getting more people in looking for outfits for weddings. I wanted to concentrate on school, prom, and my future, but I kept thinking about the Rev and his tactics.

As I approached my house, I saw a beat-up, old, white camper drive by in the other lane. It seemed out of place for this area. I couldn't make out the plates, but they weren't from PA. When I reached our house, I saw a white box sticking out of the mailbox. I immediately pulled into the driveway and ran in the house. Sam came out and looked at it, then left it alone and called the police.

"What can you remember about the camper?" asked Sam.

"It was a white pickup with a camper top. It was an old truck. I think it was a Ford. The plates weren't Pennsylvanian. That's what caught my attention, but I didn't look at them all that close," I explained

The box was a white shoebox tied closed with string. Sam felt that it wasn't dangerous, but he saw no need to take chances.

The police arrived and, after examining the box carefully, they removed it from the mailbox. They opened it up and called Sam over to see inside. I'd hoped that it was a false alarm, but judging by his expression I could tell that the Rev had struck again.

"May I see?" I yelled. I was standing up by the front door with Mom, Cat and Terri.

Sam waved us down, "Just don't touch it."

Inside the box was a male action figure doll in a dress. There was a sign attached to it saying, "I'm Eric the lying freak!" and a card saying, "Save your soul and tell the truth! Free Jason!"

"This is pretty sick and pathetic. It's like being harassed by some six-year-old kids!" I stated angrily.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned to see Officer Tom Bell, "You okay, kid?" he asked.

"Yes, thanks, I'm just really pissed." I was glad to see him on this case.

"I put out a description of the truck; if we find it, we'll question the driver," announced Tom.

"Great I appreciate that. I would like copies of the photos of this sent to my office in the morning," stated Sam.

"Will do, sir," replied Tom.

We walked back in the house. So far it was just annoying. He really hadn't done anything all that illegal, and we weren't even sure it was The Rev. Sam was grilling dinner and Mom had invited Cat and Terri over. I would have called, Laura but I knew she was having dinner with her family.

Thankfully, dinner was very good and being surrounded by friends and family made me feel very safe and secure.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Two

School was very exciting. Prom fever was running through the school and almost every senior girl had a bad case of it, including yours truly. I did talk with Ms. B about the latest incident. She told me that I shouldn't worry as I had so many people in my corner.

Lisa was still in the program and seemed to be less moody. She told me that she was looking forward to the prom. Even Denise seemed to be looking forward to the prom. I asked her if she a date, and she told me that she was going with the bass player from the Downfall. I couldn't remember what she looked like, but I was sure that they'd be the two most interesting persons at the prom.

At lunch we all were talking about the prom. Tracey still wasn't back from the funeral; Kristen said that they were returning late the next day. Laura was really getting fed up with all the BS associated with planning the prom and grad night. She had a meeting every day after school. She felt it was overkill and that if everyone just did their jobs, there wouldn't be a need for so many meetings.

"Mom says the same thing about her job," I remarked.

Kristen confirmed that everything was set for our dinner and the limo. We were all going to meet at her house, and the limo would pick us up there. It was all pretty exciting.

The rest of the day passed without incident. I walked home with Cat, as Laura had her meeting to attend. I would have stuck around, but I needed to get home for work. It also gave me a chance to talk with Cat.

"When is Matt arriving? I asked.

"Thursday night. He was going to get a hotel room, but I arranged for him to stay over at Alex's place. They have a guest room in the upstairs part of the barn next to Alex's room," explained Cat. That would work out well as Alex was throwing a post prom party.

"I can't wait until Saturday night. I'm shocked at how much I'm getting into this whole prom thing," I exclaimed.

"I still remember your shock and horror when I first called you Erika, and now you can't wait to be all dolled up for the senior prom," joked Cat.

"I know, it's been a very enlightening year."

"Just remember when you sell your life story to Hollywood, I get to pick who plays me," smiled Cat.

"I just hope that there's a happy ending."

"There will be. I don't see it happening any other way." Her confidence was very reassuring.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Three

I got home from work just in time to join Sam and Mom for dinner. Mom had just beat me home, and Sam had cooked dinner for us. He was actually a pretty good cook.

"So what's for dinner? It smells really good."

"Beef stew, old family recipe," he answered.

It tasted as good as it smelled. "Any news on the Rev?" I asked.

"No. I called Marlene and she's very interested in seeing the photos of the doll. She got a very interesting phone call from Martin Turner. He said that neither he nor Jason has any thing to do with what is happening, and that he wanted to reassure her that they don't support the Rev's actions. In fact, they've sent a letter to the paper stating this. If he's telling the truth, then it'll hurt the Rev a lot."

"Why would Jason do that?" I asked. Sam had also baked some biscuits, and I was putting some butter and honey on one.

"It works well in his favor. By not supporting the Rev, he'll look better to the parole board," explained Sam.

"Do you think that they'll remember that in twenty years?" I asked. I took a bite of the biscuit and it was excellent.

"If he stays clean and avoids problems, it won't hurt him," added Sam. "There's no way that the case will be reviewed. Even Martin Turner refused to appeal the case."

"There's a name that I hoped never to hear again." The biscuit was very good and I decided to splurge and have a second one.

"I know he isn't top on your list, but he is a good attorney. If there was even a slight chance of an appeal succeeding, he would have filed. I think he's glad that Jason didn't get a stiffer sentence."

"I don't question his legal skills, just his sense of morality."

"Changing the subject, we need to tell you some happier news," said Mom. "We filed your name change paper work today."

"Really? That's great! So what is my new name going to be?" I asked anxiously.

"The adoption papers are still being processed, so you last name will still be Walters for now and of course your first name will be Erika," said Mom.

"And my middle name?" I asked.

"I want to tell you the reason first. I have decided to give you the name of my best friend who I told you about the other night. So you'll be Erika Jean Walters;, until the wedding. What do you think?" asked Mom.

"Sounds lovely, although I can't wait until it is Erika Jean Warren! I'm honored that you're giving me the name of your best friend," I said, and I got up and gave them both a hug.

During dessert I told them about the loan for my surgery. I'd forgotten to tell them earlier due to all the crap with the Rev. Sam said that it sounded too good to be true but he'd review the paperwork when it arrived. He said that if it was as good as advertised then we should consider it.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Four

I checked Tuesday's paper and didn't see any replies to the Rev's letter. I figured that I'd see some in tomorrow's paper. I was looking forward to talking to Jenny that afternoon. I had much that I needed to discuss and a few things I wanted to vent. My biggest fear was that I'd have another episode brought on by the stress of the Rev. I didn't want to screw up the prom or graduation.

I was also looking forward to my weekly chat with Sandra. Mom was very happy that I had a successful TS woman I could talk to, impressed with the support group that the scholarship committee had formed.

School was a breeze. I haven't talked a lot about my grades. I was a pretty solid B student at my old high school. I'd never taken the extra effort to push for higher grades. That all changed at Central High. My first term grades were excellent and I'd ended up with five A's and a B. This semester I was looking at all A's. I never cared about something like that before. I only wished that I'd become more motivated earlier. I'm not totally sure about why my grades were so much better. Maybe it was due to growing up or because of the move, or maybe it was due to being at ease with myself. Whatever the reason, I was proud of my new higher academic standing.

Laura drove me; she said that she wouldn't miss our post therapy cappuccinos. I had a good session with Jenny. I told her all about the Rev's tactics. I suspected that she already knew but she didn't let on. I also expressed my fears about prom and graduation. She did a good job in easing my fears, telling me that I wasn't at fault for this. So many people had told me this, yet I still had a feeling that it was my fault. Stupid? Yes, but that's why they are called irrational fears.

Afterwards at Spencer's, I had my usual the key lime pie and cappuccino. I was beginning to think that they saved me a slice knowing where I was coming from. Laura shifted to cheesecake with raspberries on top. I tried a piece and it was very good.

"You know you've now been on hormones for six weeks!" Laura reminded me.

"Wow, you're right." I took a bite of the key lime pie.

"How do you feel?" asked Laura.

"Good," I answered with a big smile on my face.

"I thought you'd like the outfit I picked out for you at the sleepover. I imagine that it felt nice against your budding nipples," whispered Laura.

I smiled and giggled. "It felt very nice."

We finished our treat and went for a walk around the campus area. The weather was nice and there was a feeling that summer wasn't too far away. I longed to just lie in the sun. I wasn't really into sunbathing, I just wanted to feel the warmth on my changing body. Laura kidded me about helping me pick out my first bathing suit. It was so much fun to just have a regular conversation with my girlfriend.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Five

I called Sandra around 8:00. We'd been trading e-mails so she knew all about the Rev. I also told her that my name change paperwork had been filed.

"That is a huge step. I'm very happy for you. So what do you want to talk about tonight?" she asked.

"How do you handle your identity? I mean you said that you tell people that you date, but do you still see yourself as transgendered or as female? This isn't coming out the way I want it to," I asked.

"I think I know what you mean. I don't wear the label "transsexual" on my lapel. I'm not ashamed of who and what I am. But I'm not an activist either. I do have friends who are very public about being TS and that's right for them. I'm mainstream, but I don't lie either. My boss and coworkers know about me, and they are comfortable with me. I'm TS, but it isn't my entire identity. I believe I can best help our cause by showing that A TS can function normally and without a lot of fanfare. This doesn't mean that I don't stand up for my rights. Mainstream doesn't mean doormat. Does that make sense to you?"

"Yes, it does. I'm torn between wanting to be just accepted as a woman, and at the same time I want to stand up to intolerance."

"You can do both," she answered.

We talked for another hour or so. Many of the questions were related to the changes that I was beginning to notice. It was nice knowing someone who could get me through the rough parts and prepare me for what was happening. She gave me a few good websites to look at for both hormones and surgery.

"I have one last question, do you have any regrets on getting the surgery?" I asked

"Only that I didn't get it sooner. It's not a cure all, but it did give me a sense of wholeness. Don't look at it as the end of the journey, but as another step. We can talk more about this next time. Have a great time at the prom!"

We agreed to the talk next week and we said goodbye.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Six

Wednesday's paper had the first responses to the Rev. Now our paper always tried to show balance in the editorial and letters section, so I knew that I should look at content instead of numbers. I was pleasantly surprised by the letters; almost all were in support of me.

I was pleased to see they'd printed both Marlene's and Martin Turner's responses. Martin's was more of a disclaimer against the Rev than it was a letter of support for me. But I was really pleased to see letters from people telling the Rev to stay away. One man claimed to have been on the jury and he said that Jason wasn't just guilty but VERY guilty. The rest of the letters that supported me all made it clear that my gender wasn't an issue. One of the letters in support of me was from a minister. I was really pleased to see that one, as it showed that this wasn't a religious issue, but a legal and human rights issue.

There were a couple that supported Jason. One said that it couldn't be rape as I wasn't really female. I guess he never read the law. Another was a very strong religious rant against me. I was grouped with illegal drugs, illegal immigrants, abortion, divorce, and evolution as the reasons society was about to collapse. I didn't know I was SO important. I'm surprised he didn't propose burning me at the stake! Still another blamed the scholarship competition for causing all the problems in the first place.

I was very happy and excited by the positive responses. Mom said that I shouldn't get too excited.

"Don't get me wrong honey, I think this is wonderful, and I truly think that it reflects the opinion of the majority of the people here in town, but there will still be those who oppose you and they may do it more intelligently than the two in the paper," she remarked.

She was right. I needed to be ready for criticism. Still, it felt very good seeing the support against the Rev.

The rest of the week there were other responses in the paper to the Rev. They were overwhelmingly against the Rev. I recognized a few names in the support letters. As for the letters in support of the Rev and/or against me they were few and very poorly stated. Paul told me that he'd talked to the editor in charge of selecting letters, and he had stated that the negative letters printed in the paper were the best ones sent in. He also told Paul that many came in with out of state postmarks with no return address, leading him to believe that the Rev and his group were sending in responses. Those never got printed.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Seven

Jumping ahead to Friday evening, I was sitting with Laura in Spencer's. We sat very close to each other. It felt good just to sit with her. We'd both had an emotional week. My issues have been discussed already. Laura had to deal with the last minute planning for the prom. She was fed up with all the petty arguments and complaints. She joked about getting Tony the limo driver's friends to take out some of the members of the student government.

"Are you shooting to be the senior class dictator or president?" I asked

"I prefer Empress, or Queen of the Senior Class."

"I thought I was in contention for that?" I joked. She elbowed me in the ribs for that one.

We went back to her place and went up to her room. I took off my top and bra and exposed my chest. My nipples were obviously bigger, and there was noticeable growth in my breasts. Granted, they were still very small. I couldn't toss my breast pads away quite yet.

"Oh, my! Erika, you really are growing. They're so cute!" she squealed.

She downloaded the photo and compared it to the previous ones. There was definite growth. She took my hand and led me to her bed. Her fingers along my nipples made me flinch slightly.

"Hmmm, seems that they are getting more sensitive; I like that," remarked Laura. She took off her top and bra.

"So do I," I replied and I leaned over to kiss her.

Laura continued to stimulate my nipples. It felt wonderful. The feelings of pleasure weren't just centralized around the nipples; rather they went deep into my body. I felt tingles all over my body. I returned the favor and also rubbed and caressed her breasts and nipples. The changes in my body were so wonderful, and Laura took great pleasure in helping me discover them. There was none of the pressure or stress that I'd experienced when I tried to do this as a boy. Instead it felt so natural that there was no pressure.

Just then the phone rang. I told her to ignore it but she answered it anyway.

"Hel-lo?" asked Laura. Her breathing was rather heavy and she paused slightly in the middle of the word. She listened and looked at me and smiled and then started laughing. "Okay, we'll be there, bye."

"What's up?" I asked

"That was Cat. She wants us to 'put aside our lust' and join her and Matt over at the pizza place," she said giggling.

We got dressed and I checked my makeup and brushed my hair. Laura said I looked cute and that we should be going.

We caught up with Matt and Cat at the pizza place. The rest of our prom group was there too. The guys were oblivious to the way Laura and I looked. Cat smiled a very sly smile, as did Kristen. Tracey just shook her head.

"What?" I asked, holding back a smile.

"Hey, look who finally made it here!" announced Alex, "Cat said that you were studying. You two need to lighten up and have fun, remember this is prom weekend."

"Good advice, Alex, thank you," replied Laura. To this day I don't know how we all held in our laughter

We hung out there for a couple of hours. We soon broke up into two conversations, the guys talking about sports and the girls talking about the prom. Laura, Cat, and I all had our appointments for the salon in the morning. Kristen and Tracey were doing the same thing at a different salon. Kristen reminded us to bring a change of clothes for the party at Alex's barn. For the next day or so, I was able to put my fears aside and focus on having fun.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Eight

I woke up early Saturday morning. I felt like a little kid on Christmas morning, as I was so excited about the Prom. My appointment at the salon wasn't until 11:00, so I had plenty of time to kill. It was clear and warm outside. Cat said that it wouldn't dare rain this weekend. I decided to go for a run. I slipped on a pair of shorts, sports bra, t-shirt, socks, and running shoes. It was nice enough outside, so I didn't need any sweats. I did my usual stretches. Coach was religious about us doing our stretches before running. I left a note for Mom and Sam and then I took off.

Even with the Rev lurking about, I felt safe enough to run by myself. I headed down towards the school. There weren't a lot of people up at 7:00 in our neighborhood. I did see several rabbits and plenty of birds. I was aware of my surroundings. I kept to the sidewalks and selected a large looping route. Maybe it was just my imagination, but I swore that I could feel my breasts bounce a little as I ran.

I couldn't believe that there was only one month of school left. I thought about what would be going down in the next few months. After prom there would be graduation. I had mixed feelings about high school ending. I'd miss my friends and the comfort zone I had at Central. After school ended, I'd get my scar and nose repaired. After that the next biggest thing would be the planning for Mom and Sam's wedding. They'd decided on the first Saturday in August as the date, and the invitations had been sent out. Mom wanted an outdoor wedding, so they'd reserved the park just south of town. It had a small river that ran through it and was a popular place for weddings. The reception would be held in our backyard, and Sam knew a caterer who would set up tents for the guests. Terri said that we could use their backyard too. When Sam and Mom finished with the list of guests, it looked like we'd have 100-120 people, if everyone showed up.

I made the turn at the high school and started down on the main road towards downtown. Mom and Sam had agreed that I could get my plastic surgery after graduation. I'd be going to New York the week after graduation to get my nose and scar fixed. That would give me over six weeks to heal before the wedding. Our insurance had agreed to pay the cost. I think they did this because the work was going to be done with a FOML (Friends of Mrs. Lincoln) discount. Dr. David Ayres had offered me a greatly discounted price for the work. I wasn't going to turn it down. Mom was going up with me, and we were going to sightsee and shop the weekend before my surgery. She wanted to have a girls' weekend before the wedding. Mrs. Lincoln also had arranged for Tony to pick us up. She said that it was part of the company health plan.

I came to an intersection and I hung a right. I'd take this road for two more miles and then curve back into our neighborhood. The entire route was a little over six miles. I then thought about Laura. She'd be leaving for college a few weeks after the wedding. Neither of us wanted to think about being separated. We both knew it was inevitable, at least for her first year of school. My staying in Golden Hill until after the surgery and her going to the best school for her education just made too much sense, even if it hurt from an emotional point of view.

I was hoping to get my sexual reassignment surgery in early summer of the following year. Laura and Cat both said that they wanted to be there for me and I wanted them there too. Sam had agreed that the loan was a very good deal, and we'd sent in the paperwork. I was pleasantly surprised at how smoothly the medical side of my transition was progressing.

I reached the turn off into our neighborhood. I'd worked up a good sweat and felt very relaxed and loose. I reached the house and did my cool down routine. Coach was religious about that too. When I finished, I picked up the papers and headed inside.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Seventy-Nine

The aroma of freshly brewed coffee told me immediately that Sam was up. It was amazing how easily Sam had become part of our lives. It was hard to imagine him not living with us.

As soon as I walked into the kitchen, I said. "Good morning, Dad." Sam was sitting at the table reading a law brief for his latest trial. Mom was scrambling some eggs and cooking some bacon. It smelled very good.

"Hi, hon, how was your run?" asked Mom

"Great," I said. "Here are the papers."

"You want some breakfast?" asked Mom.

"Yes, please. Can I go shower first?" I asked.

"We'd both appreciate that," quipped Sam from behind his law brief.

I'd have thrown the Times at him, but I could hear him snickering.

I ran upstairs and took a quick shower and changed. I put on a light cotton sleeveless dress and my sandals. I then went downstairs to eat.

Mom showed me the latest editorial page and went back to making my breakfast. The letters printed were still overwhelmingly in my favor. Many were angry that an outsider would come into town to try to gain publicity from a violent crime. The paper even had an editorial stating that the town didn't need people coming in to spread hate and misinformation. It made me feel very warm inside as I read it. The interesting thing was that for most people my physical gender wasn't an issue.

After breakfast, I finished up some schoolwork. I only had a short assignment to finish for Mr. Kline. When I finished it my weekend was clear. I'd even been given the day off from work on Sunday. Mrs. Lincoln really did look after her "girls."

Around 10:30, Laura and Cat came over. We said goodbye and headed downtown. As we entered the salon, I looked up and saw my photo above the receptionist. Okay, I admit that I'm a bit egotistical about it, but you have to admit that it's pretty cool to see your picture displayed like you were a celebrity.

I really loved being pampered and the salon did a great job. I'd been going there since last summer. I had my legs waxed there every month. It was so much better than shaving! I was getting my hair dyed and styled. I was also getting my nails done, both fingers and toes. The manicurist had asked us earlier that week to show her our dresses, so she could pick a good color for each of us.

I had my hair done first. My hair color for most of school had been light brown. My stylist felt that I should go with a more auburn color. Cat and Laura felt that it would look great and so I agreed, although reluctantly. I was very nervous about doing anything drastic the day of the Prom. There were visions of looking like a clown running through my head. The stylist promised me that I'd love it.

Cat went for a new look and had her long hair cut shorter to just off her shoulders. She looked great, although I missed seeing her in a ponytail. Laura kept her hair the same length but had it curled slightly.

I was very pleased with my new hair color. It wasn't that different from my original color, but I liked the slight red tone. My nails were done in a light violet color to match my dress. Cat and Laura both had their nails done in a rich red. We talked as our nails dried.

"How do you like your new hairstyle, Cat? I think you look lovely."

"I love it. I've been wanting to go to a shorter style for a long time. I told Matt that I was doing it and he didn't seem to mind."

"I think you look great too Cat," added Laura. "I also love your new hair color Erika, it really suits you."

"Thanks. I think you look wonderful too!" I remarked.

"Well, it's settled, we all look great; so look out, world!" exclaimed Cat.

We were all going to meet over at Laura's house to get dressed. Laura insisted on doing our makeup. I didn't mind and even Cat was agreeable to the idea. Laura's parents had invited our families over for drinks, so they could all see us before we left to go over to Kristen's.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Eighty

Cat and I drove over to Laura's house around four. This gave us plenty of time to get ready. We went upstairs and changed.

I went in the bathroom and put on the lavender lingerie that Mrs. Lincoln had bought me. I wanted tonight to be perfect in every way! I was hoping I'd get enough help from the push-up bra so I could skip the pads. I had to admit that it did a good job. I then slipped on my robe and rejoined Cat and Laura.

Laura had just finished with Cat and she looked fantastic. I only hoped I'd looked half as good as she did.

"Okay, Erika... you're next," stated Laura. She pointed to the chair in front of her makeup table.

I sat down and put myself into Laura's hands. Laura is very serious about her makeup abilities and she methodically did my face. She wouldn't let me see what she was doing, but I had complete trust in her. They both commented on my lingerie. Laura was extremely pleased that I was wearing a garter belt.

I wasn't disappointed by her work. I looked great! She'd done a great job concealing my scar so that it was barely noticeable—even by me. I really loved how she'd made my eyes look so lovely.

While she did her own makeup, Cat and I carefully got dressed. I wasn't used to wearing a strapless bra, but it was necessary due to my dress having spaghetti straps. I carefully slipped it on—I didn't want to mess up the dress, my face, or my hair. I succeeded and was happy with how I looked. Mom had loaned me a string of pearls and some matching earrings. They complemented the dress perfectly. I slipped on my open-toed four-inch heels, and I had to admit that I looked fantastic

Cat looked absolutely stunning in her black gown, and Laura was exquisite in her red strapless gown. All three of us were beaming as we posed for the mirror. Laura came up and put some of her favorite perfume on my neck and wrists. I closed my eyes and let the scent seep in.

"So, are we all ready or what?" asked Laura.

"Let's go wow our loved ones," stated Cat as she grabbed her purse and wrap.

"I'm definitely wowed," said Laura, she was looking at me and smiling.

I felt myself start to blush as I grabbed my wrap and purse.

"You're so sexy when you blush," whispered Laura.

We went downstairs and were greeted by heartfelt compliments. Mom was speechless as I came into the room. Sam looked very pleased.

Mom was standing there beaming at me. "Oh, honey, you're so beautiful. I'm so happy for you!"

We posed for the first of many photos. We were totally into full prom mode. Matt arrived and was thrilled with Cat's appearance, as well he should have been! He pinned on her corsage and they then posed for several photos.

Laura was not to be outdone. She brought out our flowers. She had selected a very lovely orchid corsage for me and took great care in pinning it on me. Her corsage was very similar and I helped put it on her. Because she was wearing a strapless gown, her corsage had a wristband.

We posed for several photos. I was happy that Laura's parents had come around and could share in her joy this evening. I was also happy that I was able to share this moment with Mom and Sam.

We headed over to Kristen's house in Laura's car. We were all excited about the limo ride to the restaurant. Matt said that he felt like royalty riding in a car with three beautiful women.

At Kristen's house, we caught up with the rest of our group. Kristen looked great. She was wearing a strapless silver gown. It looked like it had been painted onto her. Tracey's dress was red and it was cut lower than Laura's. The guys were all in classic James Bond tuxedos. Mike was the only one who deviated from the black and white scheme by wearing a bow tie and cummerbund in an African tribal pattern. Kristen's mother had us all pose together for a group shot.

A few minutes later, the limo arrived. It was a large black stretch job. As we walked out to it, Cliff pulled in the driveway with Mel. They were having dinner with his parents. Cliff gave me a wolf whistle when he saw me. Mel shook her head in mock disgust.

"You all look great. I'm glad to see our products have such pretty girls to wear them," exclaimed Mel. "Oh, Erika! You look lovely, and I love your new hair color, it really looks great."

I smiled and thanked her. I was happy that they'd seen me. Actually I wanted everyone I knew to see me!

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Eighty-One

We arrived at the restaurant and the chauffeur opened the door for us. We were going to enjoy every second of this night. We walked in and were taken to our table. There were a few other couples from Central High there. The waiter came up and couldn't have been nicer. He was an older man and he played the game perfectly, treating us like we were celebrities. His name was Charles and he was very sweet.

The only problem occurred due to a younger waiter. He was serving the tables next to us and he kept staring at Laura and I. He stood so we could see him and he shook his head slowly, as if he was feeling sorry for us. He looked like he was in college and was good looking, although not as good looking as he thought he was.

We watched him as he approached. "I'm so sorry that you two lovely young ladies don't have dates tonight. It's such a shame!"

"Excuse me? What are you talking about?" asked Laura in a sweet innocent tone.

"Hi, I'm Larry and well... I just hate to see two such gorgeous young women be without dates on a night like this." He then winked at us and gave us his best sexy smile.

We looked at each other and tried not to laugh. "We're not without dates," replied Laura.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did your dates get delayed?" he replied. He looked confused.

Laura looked at me. "He's a bit slow," she explained in a low voice. She then reached over and pulled me close and we kissed, slowly and sensually. We stopped and looked up at him and smiled sweetly at him.

He stood there with a trout look on his face. You know the look, eyes bulging and mouth open. He didn't say a word and just backed away.

"You two are just awful!" admonished Cat. We all started laughing.

"Oh, he had it coming," I laughed.

"He probably wants you two even more now," added Kristen.

"Ugh, please!" Laura grimaced.

Fortunately, the rest of the customers missed our little display. I didn't mind confusing Larry, but I didn't want to make a scene that might ruin the night.

Larry didn't bother us the rest of the night. Because of that we won our bet with Alex and Matt. They'd bet that he would give us his phone number before we left. We won a dance with each of them, which we would have gotten anyway, but it was nice to be right.

We drove through downtown on the way to the Prom. This gave us a chance to show off as we went through downtown. The chauffeur drove slowly so we could wave to passersby. The prom was being held in the Civic Center, the same place where I was in the fashion show.

The limo pulled up to the front entrance and we were let out. The chauffeur gave us his beeper number and told us to call when it was time to leave. We all looked at each other and smiled. "Okay everyone, let's go make an entrance they won't ever forget," stated Kristen.

We walked in as couples. Laura and I got a few dirty looks, but no one dared say anything. We also got some rather lustful looks from some of the guys. It's strange how some guys have such a thing about two girls in love. Laura said that she thinks they find it sexy and they imagine they can be the guy who "changes" us so we'll like men.

The theme was "Hollywood." They had two spotlights pointed up into the sky. We walked in on a red carpet and there were teachers posing as paparazzi there to take our photos. They'd done a great job in decorating. On one wall was a takeoff of the Hollywood sign. This one spelled out Central High and our graduation year. All around the other walls were movie posters and life-sized cutouts of movie stars. Above the stage was a movie marquee with our class year in lights. Once inside we all stopped and soaked in the atmosphere.

"Laura, the Prom committee did a great job!" exclaimed Tracey. We all agreed and congratulated her.

We walked around and checked out each other. I saw Caroline and Paul. They were with a group from the school paper. Caroline looked fantastic in her deep purple gown. I also had to admit that Paul looked very sharp in his tux. I wondered for a second what might have been. But when I looked over at Laura I shook those thoughts out of my mind. She was so stunning tonight.

I really wanted to see Denise and her date. I looked around and saw her hair. After all, she was the only girl in our class with white hair. Denise was wearing a lovely strapless black leather dress and she looked really great in it. Her date was wearing a similar dress, only hers was shorter and she was wearing knee-high leather high heel boots, while Denise was in heels. I was glad that Denise was staying true to her beliefs and not conforming to please everyone else.

Ms. B came up to us and commented on how lovely we all looked. She said that she'd like a photo with us. She also had a shot taken with the Fab Four. Yes, Lisa did show up. She was wearing a red gown and looked wonderful. Ms. B and the four of us posed for a photo together. I could see how proud she was of us.

Of course I had my photo taken with Laura. We also had one taken that included Cat, Kristen, Tracey, and Caroline.

The rest of the night was filled with dancing and celebration. The band was really good. I'd improved somewhat as a dancer, thanks to Laura and Cat's lessons. I danced the whole night. I saved most of the slow dances for Laura, but the rest of the dances I was fair game. I collected my bet and danced with Alex and Matt. I also danced with Paul, Mike, and several other guys. I also danced with Cat, Kristen, and Rachael.

We even got some of the faculty out on the dance floor. Ms. B joined Cat, Laura, and I for one dance. I also had a slow dance with Mr. Kline.

As expected, Alex and Kristen were elected Prom King and Queen. They deserved it and they looked great in their solo dance.

I was also relieved to see that the Rev was nowhere in sight. The night was too special for some lunatic to ruin.

I lost all track of time and was disappointed when they announced last dance. I wanted the night to go on forever! Laura led me out to the dance floor and held me close as the music played. I didn't want it to end, our bodies were so close, and we were so much in love.

We hung around talking before we left. Everyone had a great time and people were thanking Laura as they left.

"Erika, did you sit out any dances tonight?" asked Kristen.

"I don't think so," I replied with a huge smile on my face.

"Well, if you danced the whole night in those shoes then you really have become a girl," remarked Tracey with a smile.

Everyone just stared at her for a second then we all started laughing. Tracey wasn't exactly known for her sense of humor. I also knew that she had finally accepted me. Up to that point, I'd always sensed a little uneasiness from her when we were together. I never felt that again.

We got into the limo and headed back to Kristen's house. This would allow us to change before the party. The guys didn't mind staying in their tuxedos; all they had to do was loosen their ties. Besides, they all thought they looked so sexy and macho when they did that. I had to admit that I have a real soft spot for a guy in a tux.

We didn't dress totally down as we shifted to more casual party dresses. I started into the bathroom to change, "Hey, Erika you can change out here with the rest of us; no one minds, we're all girls in here," said Kristen.

I looked around the room and saw that everyone was in agreement. That simple act made the night perfect. I had to hold back crying.

"Thank you," I said. "You have no idea how important this moment is."

For most of the year I hadn't really minded changing separately, as I didn't want to make other people uncomfortable. But since I'd started hormones it had bothered me a bit. They all came over and gave me big group hug.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Eighty-Two

We drove over to the Alex's party in our separate cars. The party at Alex's was much more low-key and relaxing. It gave us a chance to sit, unwind and talk about the night. Everyone agreed that it was a great evening and that we'd remember it the rest of our lives.

I went into the house to use the bathroom. I was walking back to the barn, when Alex's mom came up to me in their kitchen and asked me to pass on her congratulations to Sam and Mom on their engagement. She also told me that I could count on their support if the Rev came to town. I thanked her.

"I'm not too worried as I have seen how the town has responded to his threats," I answered

"Well, we talked about it at our church, and we voted to oppose him if he does come to town. The scholarship program has help create a community that is very tolerant. It's not perfect, but we've all grown due to the program."

"The program seems to have made a huge impact on the community. Does everyone in your church feel this way?"

"To be totally honest? No, they don't, but a majority is against this so-called 'reverend'!"

I smiled back. "I appreciate your honesty."

"I don't want to keep you from all your friends, I just wanted to let you know that you have a lot of people on your side."

Her comments made me feel very good. I'd have preferred that she didn't talk about it that night, but she meant well. I hoped that the Rev would sense how little support he'd get here and stay away.

I returned to the barn and sat down next to Laura. She put her arm around me and pulled me close to her side. Tonight had been a huge event for her. She'd really made a statement about her life and, for the most part she was well received. Being TS, I have other issues to worry about besides my sexuality. I knew that as I was accepted more as a woman than as TS then my sexuality would be a bigger issue.

We hung around for a couple of hours. No one really wanted to leave, but eventually every good thing comes to an end. Matt said that he'd give Cat a ride home, so Laura and I took off together. We drove slowly back to my house.

Once in the driveway, we began to kiss. It started off as a goodnight kiss but it soon got much more serious. We were soon locked in passion. It felt so good being in her arms. Neither of us wanted to stop, but we knew that it had to end.

"I love you and I'm so happy that we had this night together," smiled Laura.

"I love you too. I still can't believe that we kissed in the restaurant!"

We both starting laughing. "I've wanted to do something like that my whole life," she replied.

We kissed again and I got out and grabbed my bag. My prom dress was still over at Kristen's. Laura said she'd come by later on and we could go get them. I looked at my watch and saw that it was 3:00 AM.

"Do me a favor and call me when you get home?" I asked.

"Sure thing."

She waited until I was inside and then she left. I went into the kitchen to wait for her call. I was too keyed up to go to sleep immediately anyway. I heard someone coming down the stairs and was slightly surprised to see Mom.

"Oh…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," I apologized.

"No problem, I'm happy to see that you're home. So, how was it?" she asked.

"Oh, Mom, it was wonderful! We had such a great time. I can't wait to tell you all about it," I exclaimed.

"Let's do it later on, I'm going back upstairs."

"I'll be right up, I'm waiting for Laura to call telling me she's home."

"Good night dear." She hugged me again and headed back upstairs.

I said good night and waited for Laura's call. Thankfully, she called a few minutes later and said that she was in and that she loved me. I went up to my room and went to bed. It had been a wonderful evening, and I drifted off into a deep restful sleep.

 

(continued)

  

  

  

*********************************************
© 2004 by Julie O. All Rights Reserved. These documents (including, without limitation, all articles, text, images, logos, and compilation design) may be printed for personal use only. No portion of these documents may be stored electronically, distributed electronically, or otherwise made available without the express written consent of StorySite and the copyright holder.