The Scholarship

by

Julie O.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Thirty-Eight

Once again, my sleep was shattered by nightmares that forced me to relive what Jason had done to me. This time it was more horrible as it diverted from what had actually happened. I was on the ground and Jason was holding a knife to my throat. I fought back this time, and I saw the knife being raised and being slammed down towards my throat. I screamed and woke in my darkened room. I was breathing heavily, my heart was pounding, and my face was wet with sweat. I fumbled for the light and was relieved to see that I was in my room. The feeling of panic began to subside.

I sat there for a second and was startled by Mom opening my door. I managed to smile when she looked in.

"Sorry." I wiped the tears from my face.

She came in and sat next to me. "Tell me about it."

I told her about the nightmare. I hadn't realized at first that I had actually screamed. I was worried that my behavior would negatively affect their relationship.

"I guess Sam is having second thoughts about moving in with you and your crazy daughter."

"No, he isn't," answered Sam. He was standing in my doorway. "You're not crazy Erika, please don't say that again."

I looked up and smiled, it was either that or start crying, "Okay, Dad." I cannot express what his support meant to me.

They sat up with me for a little while. I told them that I was better and that they should go back to bed. I then went back to bed and thankfully had no more nightmares.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Thirty-Nine

Jenny had told me that I might have a series of nightmares. She'd said that it could last a few days or go on much longer. I was beginning to see the real hideous nature of Jason's crime. He'd violated me in more ways than I had imagined.

I decided to maintain the open lines of communication between myself and Cat and Laura. Cat found the fact that the latest dream deviated from reality very interesting.

"In the actual attack you didn't initially resist, and in your dream you tried to fight him and he obviously was going to kill you," explained Cat.

"Thanks, I feel much better now, Dr. Hawkins," I quipped.

"Okay, smartass, what if this means you're trying to work out any guilt you have over not fighting back?" asked Cat. She then cracked a smile.

"Well then, I now know that initially screaming would have been a bad idea. So what do you think suddenly caused this?" I asked

.

"Save that question for Jenny," suggested Cat. "Seriously... you should keep a journal and write all this down, including the dreams."

"I will. Thanks for caring."

"Do you really think that dreams have real meaning?" asked Laura.

"I don't know. But I do know that those nightmares were very realistic," I answered

"I think they have meaning if we want them to," added Cat.

"Changing the subject, are you sticking around this afternoon to help Coach Chambers?" asked Laura

"Yes. Jenny told me that I could keep my regular schedule. Why?" I asked

"Just wondering if you want a ride home or not. I have to stick around for a couple of hours today. The prom committee needs my expert leadership!" she stated with a large dose of sarcasm.

"That would be nice, thanks," I replied. I suspected that something was up, but kept silent.

The weather was really nice. It was sunny and warm and there was a nice breeze blowing. I was wearing a khaki skirt, a blue top and my school jacket. I'd also taken my sandals out of their winter hibernation. They felt good and served as a promise of warmer weather.

During homeroom I was given a pass to see Ms. B. I figured that it had something to do with my latest problems. Sure enough Ms. B wanted me to know that she was there to help.

I sat down in her office. This was one of my safe havens. We all have places where we know that we are safe, or at least feel safe. Now I knew why she, along with a few other teachers, had a Safe Zone sticker on her door. This was a sign to any student that they had a refuge.

I proceeded to tell her about my nightmares and the panic attack. I really appreciated all my friends' concern and help, but at the same time I felt a little embarrassed by it. I was also a bit afraid that my continuing problems would have a negative effect on my friends and family. Yes, I know this was dumb, but those sorts of things go through your head at times like that.

"By the way, there will a special meeting at lunch tomorrow for the group," said Ms. B.

I looked at her and wondered what she meant by "special meeting." I knew that it was pointless to ask, so I didn't bother.

The rest of school went by without any problems. My problems weren't being around people; it was when I was alone that they arrived. The only side effect of my problems was that I was tired most of the time. I was desperate for a good night's sleep.

Helping Coach during practice was fu, and by afternoon the weather was beautiful making it a pleasure to be outside. Maybe you need a harsh winter to really appreciate the nice days. This would have been a typical day in San Diego, and I doubt that most of us there would have given it much thought. Coach kept me busy and I was darting around from one part of the practice field to another. I didn't mind, as I was having too much fun just being out with the team.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty

After practice, I changed and caught up with Laura. She told me about all the politics going into the planning for the prom. I haven't talked a lot about Laura's role as class president all that much. She's a very effective leader, however. She didn't try to do everything herself and had delegated a lot of tasks to the rest of the student government. She told me that she really enjoyed being in charge and bringing order to chaos. The class had been wise to elect her.

She drove me home and we went over to see Cat. We sat up in her room and talked.

"Erika, I just got a new cell phone, and I want you to call me if you have another nightmare. Don't worry about waking me up." I knew that this wasn't just being said out of politeness; Cat didn't function that way. She wrote the number down and handed it to me.

I took the card and put it in my purse. "Thanks." There was much I could have said, but it was unnecessary with Cat. I knew by Laura's reaction that they were both in on this.

Cat showed me some websites about Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome and Rape Trauma Syndrome. Jenny had given me a list that included some of these sites during my collapse after the trial. Cat went to one and pointed out a section to me showing the importance of being around loved ones and friends.

"We're going to be with you through this. Never, ever doubt that," reiterated Cat.

"And don't worry about this affecting us. If anything, I love you even more," added Laura.

I sat there for a second and tried to stay composed. I knew that if I started to talk I'd start crying.

"It's okay to cry Erika, chicks are allowed to do that." Cat smiled.

I followed her suggestion and had a really good soul-cleansing cry while Laura and Cat held me; I could feel their strength being passed on to me.

The release of emotion felt good. It wasn't as draining as responding to the nightmares; in some ways it made me stronger. I excused myself to wash my face. Thankfully I didn't have a lot of makeup on, so I didn't have "raccoon eyes" from mascara. The cold water worked wonders.

Cat asked if Laura and I wanted to stay for dinner. I figured that Laura already had permission. It wouldn't surprise me if Mom and Terri were in on this conspiracy. I called Mom up and she said that it was a great idea.

Thankfully, our dinner conversation had nothing to do with my issues. We just had normal talk about school, the prom, college, etc - nothing too deep or serious. Terri did bring up the upcoming wedding. Mom had asked her to help plan it, and she was determined to make it into a memorable event. Actually the term she used was the "Social Event of the Year." I wasn't sure that Mom wanted something that big, but it was fun to plan. Mom had asked Terri to be the maid of honor. I thought that was appropriate, as she'd become as close as a sister to Mom. Much like Cat and I.

Terri then brought up Sam and Mom's trip to Philadelphia in three weeks. Sam had a conference there and Mom was going with him. It would allow her to meet his family. I was happy that they were going.

"You know you can sleep here, Erika, we have a guest room," suggested Terri.

"She can sleep in my room. I do have a second bed," added Cat.

"Do you think you can have it excavated by then? You only have three weeks!" quipped Terri. Cat's second bed was usually covered with clothes and books.

"That sounds great," I agreed. I knew that I really didn't have a say in this, even if it was an offer. Besides, I really didn't want to be alone while they were away.

We helped clean up after dinner and then I went home. Cat and Laura walked over with me. I didn't argue with them. I was happy that I had such good friends.

I hugged Cat and then kissed Laura goodbye. Mom and Sam were sitting at the kitchen table having coffee. I shook my head in mock disbelief. "You converted her!"

"Yes, and you are next!" said Sam in a monotone, trying to sound like one of the Borg. "Resistance is futile."

I walked over and turned on the kettle and took out the tin that we kept our teabags in. I reached in and took out a bag of my dream tea. Maybe the chai spice black tea would counter any nightmares. I opened the envelope that held the bag and took a deep sniff. I dramatically held up the teabag and placed it slowly in my mug.

"Never!" I pledged

"On a more serious note, do you think that you should be drinking that this late?" asked Mom.

"Jenny suggested that I try to go on as normally as possible. Besides tea doesn't keep me awake, unlike coffee," I quipped, getting in one more salvo. Sam rolled his eyes then winked at me.

"Okay, I'm just being the concerned mother," Mom stated with a smile.

"Mom, I appreciate that. Speaking of concern, whose idea was the dinner next door?" I asked.

"It was a group idea," confessed Mom. "I want to say that you're lucky to have such loyal friends."

"I know," I answered. The water began to boil and I filled my mug.

I told them about my staying with Terri and Cat while they were in Philadelphia.

"You have no objections?" asked Mom.

"None at all. It'll be fun" I finished preparing my tea and joined them at the table.

"I promise that I'll take you on our next trip down there. I'll love showing you around," offered Sam.

"Will you take me to a real cheesesteak place?" I asked.

"You bet!" he said, "I'll take you down to a place in South Philly. I'll also introduce you to real Philadelphia sticky buns." He then explained what a cheesesteak was to Mom. She looked disgusted by the idea of eating something like that. This from the woman who'd taught me to eat fish tacos!

We talked a while longer and then I went to bed. I hoped that I'd have a restful night. I took out Cat's number and placed it next to my phone. I hoped that I wouldn't need it.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-One

I found myself in the dumpster again. My wrists were taped behind my back,

and I was struggling to get out. The walls of the dumpster were much higher, and this made it more difficult to get out. With great effort, I made it out and fell to the ground. When I got up I saw Jason's van driving towards me. I tried to run, but my legs wouldn't move. The van was just about on top of me when I woke up.

  As before, I was breathing hard and my heart felt like it would jump out of my chest. I was also soaked in sweat. I regained control and was comforted by knowing that it was a just a bad dream. Still, it had me badly shaken. I glanced over at the clock and saw that it was 3:45 AM. I sat up, reached over, and turned on the light. I found Cat's number and after a moment's hesitation I called her.

The phone rang and I heard Cat's voice. "How bad was this one?" she asked.

I told her what had happened. She was very compassionate and did her best

to make me feel at ease. We talked for thirty minutes, and then I felt good enough to try to get a bit more sleep. I thanked her being there for me.

At breakfast, I told Mom and Sam about my latest nightmare and my conversation with Cat. Mom was a bit peeved at me for not waking her, but also grateful that I had at least sought help. She also said that she was going to call Jenny again. I didn't argue.

"Do you feel up to going to school?" asked Mom

"School isn't a problem; neither is work," I replied

    "Speaking of work, I want to give you a lift there tonight," offered Sam.

    "I'd like that. Thanks, Dad."

    Cat had updated Laura that morning on my latest nocturnal horror show. She

looked very worried and I tried to reassure her that I was okay. Cat told me that she had e-mailed me my descriptions of the nightmare, so I could show Jenny the next time I saw her.

I went to school and tried to act as if nothing was wrong. That was hard. Part of me didn't want anyone to know about my problems due to pride and fear of being ridiculed. Another part wanted everyone to know. The real me was somewhere in between.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-Two

    Classes were going pretty well. American Lit was the only class that I had a big project in. I'd read both books and had actually started the paper, even though it wasn't due for two weeks. The rest of my classes were pretty easy. I had a photo essay to finish up, but I still had a few weeks. Child development was a breeze now, and all I had left was a critical book review to write. And in Mr. Kline's class I had pretty much wrapped up an A, thanks to my lecture.

I ran into Caroline on the way to the meeting with Ms. B. Cat and Laura had

told her about my problems. I didn't mind, as Caroline and I had always shared our problems. I asked her to keep it a secret from the rest of the group. I also figured that Caroline was in with Laura and Cat to watch over me.

    We were first to the meeting. I asked Caroline if she'd noticed any changes from the hormones. She said that she hadn't seen any yet.

Ms. B came in and said hi. She then told us that our group would need a new name. I immediately thought about Lisa. Before I could ask her, Lisa and Denise walked in together, followed by Ann.

"Claire dropped out?' asked Caroline, her voice showing her disbelief.

    "Yes, Charlie called me last night. Apparently he'd just found out that he's been awarded a full scholarship and grant to study music in New York City. He said that there was no need for him to stay in the competition," explained Ms. B.

    I was stunned. I thought Claire had looked the most feminine of anyone in the group. I'd also thought that she might have been the third person. I was also amazed at how quickly Ms. B could shift in gender when talking about her. It took me much longer to make the change.

There was a long silence in the group. I didn't know her that well, but she

was nice. On the other hand, it was cool that she'd gotten a scholarship

"How about Fab Five?" asked Caroline.

We all agreed that it was a good name. Denise said that if we dropped to four it would be easy enough to change. That made us all smile a little, even if it was morbid gallows humor. I felt a bit down about Claire dropping out. When we lost someone now, it was like there'd been a death in the family.

"I have something for each of you," said Ms. B. She then handed us each a large envelope.

Inside were 8x10 glossy photos from the fashion show. There were several of me in the wedding dress and one each of the other outfits. There was also a photo of me with everyone else. The one that I liked best was the one with me tossing the bouquet.

We all looked at each other's photos. There was a slip to order duplicates. The bouquet shot was very popular.

"Now we still have a few things in store for you remaining contestants. First off, you'll be required to go to Prom. I know that most of you have already figured that out. In two weeks, you'll be working as waitresses at the charity fundraiser."

    She went on to explain that every year the town held a fancy charity dinner to raise funds for some civic cause. It was a black tie event and in addition to the meal there was a charity auction. I'd heard them talking about this at work. It would be our next big rush. It was also a tradition for the high school senior class to provide the waitresses. Each group, club, and team was expected to provide volunteers. Of course, we were all volunteered. Additionally the school would ask for volunteers. The guys didn't get out of this as they served as waiters and busboys. She told us we would have a meeting with all the workers next week.

There were some groans, but I thought it would be fun until I realized that Mom and Sam would most likely be there, along with Mrs. Lincoln! Still it should be fun.

 

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-Three

    Sam waited downstairs as I changed for work. Even though I'd have to change again once I was at work, I knew that Mrs. Lincoln didn't approve of staff arriving in jeans. I slipped on a floral pattern dress and some heels. I was actually used to wearing them now.

On the way over to work Sam and I talked. He told me that Jenny wanted to see me on Saturday. I was expecting something like that. I was also pleased that he was showing concern for me. Then I brought up the charity dinner and how I would be working as a waitress.

"Well, now I have another reason to attend. It's a great deal of fun, and you'll have a great time."

    Sam walked me into the mall. He claimed that he wanted to meet my co-workers, but I knew that he wanted to look after me. I didn't mind, as it was cool showing off my new dad.

I introduced him to Cindy and Mel and I went back to change. I stopped first at Mrs. Lincoln's office and knocked at her door.

"Excuse me, Mrs. Lincoln, but I have someone up front that I'd like you to meet."

"Who is that, my dear?" she asked.

"My dad, Sam Warren, the DA," I stated with a sense of pride.

"Well, that's someone I want to meet. Thank you for telling me." I saw her look at her watch and I got the hint to get ready for work. "Erika, I do want to talk to you later this evening,"

"Yes, Mrs. Lincoln," I answered. Obviously, Ms. B had talked to her.

I went back and changed to my dress for the evening. It was a nice light spring dress. I had to admit that wearing it made me feel better.

I walked out and saw Sam talking to Mrs. Lincoln. Not surprisingly, they got along quite well. Sam let out a low whistle when I joined them. I felt my face blush. He told me that he'd pick me up after work.

Mel and Cindy were very impressed with Sam. When Cindy and I were alone, she

talked to me a little about her case. The DA who'd prosecuted it didn't do a good job in her opinion.

"From everything I've heard about Sam, I wish he'd worked my case. You still on for Saturday?" asked Cindy

"Yes, I really need to talk with you," I stated.

    Mrs. Lincoln didn't give me the strict talking to that I'd expected. Instead, she showed her concern and told me that if I needed time off that it wouldn't be a problem. I told her that work was something I looked forward to and that Jenny had agreed that it was good for me.

"I'm looking forward to seeing you at the charity dinner," added Mrs. Lincoln, as I walked out of her office. I was happy to see Ms. B was keeping everyone well informed.

Work went well. Mel had me assist her in the display for the gowns for the big charity dinner. She told me that she'd been a waitress for the dinner when she was a senior. She said that it was a lot of fun and in some ways it was seen as an honor to work there.

Mel offered to take the trash out, but I insisted on doing it. She played lifeguard and watched as I walked to the exit and the dumpster. As I tossed the bag in, I felt a sudden sensation of fear. It was as if I had to get away from there. I remembered the "fight or flight" lecture from biology. I was determined to beat this, so I walked back, fighting my urge to run. I was angry that I had these feelings popping up for no apparent reason.

Mel asked if I was okay. I said that I was a bit shaky, but I'd survive. She told me that she would dump the trash from now on.

"Please, let me do it. If I give in to this, then what is next?" I pleaded.

She smiled and nodded, "You're almost as stubborn as I am."

Sam picked me up and I told him about my incident. He was silent at first.

"I feel sorry for what you're going through. In my career I've seen a lot of the negative effects of crime on victims and their families. I'm very proud of the way you're fighting through this and that you're not giving up."

    "That means a lot to me, coming from you. I'm so glad you're here."

    "I have faith that this will pass. You're stronger than you know."

    I wished I had as much faith as he did.

 

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-Four

    Mom told me that she'd made an appointment for me with Jenny for Saturday afternoon at 2:00. I nodded and told her what had happened at work. I had promised myself not to keep these things secret.

Thankfully, I had a night's sleep without nightmares. I hoped that it might be over for now, but deep down I knew that was too good to be true.

At school, I saw Charlie for the first time and he was just as shy as Claire. I walked by the display and saw the photos of the Fab Five. Denise's picture looked nothing like her; in fact, we all looked different. When I looked at the pictures taken back in the fall, I saw boys in dresses. Now I saw five teenage girls. I still wondered who was the third, was it Ann, Denise, or Lisa?

I helped at the track meet that afternoon. I saw Laura in the bleachers and waved to her. I was looking forward to our date and a trip to Spencer's. I wanted to be in her arms so badly. I thought about kissing her and the feel of her touch. I had to quickly refocus on the task at hand. I couldn't miss the times in the sprints because I was lusting after Laura!

It was still cool in the evenings and I needed a jacket. Normally, a high school jacket in a college area coffeehouse would be a fashion blunder, but Central High jackets were always met with smiles. Even the students who were from other areas knew about our school's more progressive views.

I need to include something that had happened at a previous visit to Spencer's. Laura and I had been sitting there when a couple of guys asked us about the scholarship program. They seemed very interested in the program.

"Are you friends with any of the contestants?" asked one guy.

"Yes, I know a few of them," answered Laura, holding back a laugh.

"Well, it would be cool if they'd come here sometime. Tell them that they are welcome here anytime," he replied.

"I'll be sure to pass that on," I added.

After they left, we broke out in giggles.

Anyway, back to Friday evening. We sat on a different couch as our normal spot was taken. Laura asked me if I had sprouted yet. I smiled and said not yet.

"I don't believe you, I'll have to check myself," she joked.

We got up and checked out the bulletin board. There were always interesting postings. What caught my attention was a poster for The Downfall of Humanity. I noticed the change in the name. They had underlined the 'the fall of man' in their name, and I smiled at the inside joke. Everyone in the band was a woman except Denise, and with her, who knew!

As we stood there, two women came up and pointed to the poster. They said that they were pretty good. I smiled and said I wished I could see them again.

"I guess they really are better," Laura remarked to me.

"Have you heard them lately?" asked one of the women, overhearing her comments.

"No, we know the drummer, and the last time we saw them they were a work in progress," I added.

"Well, they're really good now. So you know Denise? That's cool, she's a great drummer, but she I wish she was a bit more butch," said the second girl.

We both laughed and I told Laura that I couldn't wait to tell Denise that.

 

 

Chapter Hundred-Forty-Five

    Back at Laura's we went up to her room to play around. She was very interested in my changes. We decided to photograph me each week to document any changes. She took my photo from the waist up using her digital camera. Of course my top and bra were off.

After the picture she led me to her bed. "No sense in letting this opportunity go to waste," she said, and we began to kiss. I felt her hands on my chest. She gently stroked my nipples, much like she had shown me. It felt good, but I still didn't get a big reaction out it. She unbuttoned her blouse and took it off, followed by her bra. We made out and cuddled for almost an hour. At ten we stopped and got dressed.

"My parents are cool about us, but I don't think they're ready to see me half-naked and making out with you," she said with a laugh. As we dressed she looked at me and smiled. "I really love you, Erika."

"I love you too, Laura." I told her about my thoughts during the track meet.

She got a thrill out of that.

Laura drove me home and we talked about my schedule for Saturday. I said that I'd call when I got home from seeing Jenny. I hoped for a calm, restful night.

She dropped me off and we kissed for a long time. "Sweet dreams," she said as I got out of the car.

I hoped that she was right. I went inside and found that Mom and Sam were still out. That wasn't a problem, as I didn't feel uneasy about being alone. I did turn on the TV for noise as I made a mug of tea.

I did some channel surfing and settled on an old movie. It was some detective story, and it had been shot in New York. I decided to watch and see if I recognized any places. I suddenly recognized the actor that I'd met in NYC. It was one of his early roles before he became famous. He was questioning two 'working women' in a sleazy bar. He asked them about the crime he was investigating. They both looked familiar. I couldn't place them at first, but then I recognized them. The redhead was Violet from the party, and the blonde looked like Mrs. Lincoln! It wasn't a great movie, but I stuck with it until the credits. Thankfully they included the supporting cast. Sure enough, the redhead was Violet Shaw and someone named Sylvia Stone played the blonde. The first name matched, and that was too much of a coincidence. I looked in the TV guide and saw that it was being repeated at 3:00 AM. I found a blank tape and set the timer. I really wanted to have a copy of this!

I went upstairs and checked the Internet and found some listing for Sylvia Stone. There were several listings for bit parts in movies, along with many plays and musicals. I printed out the list. This was pretty cool. I wondered what other secrets Mrs. Lincoln had?

My phone rang and it was Mom telling me that they'd be home soon. I held off going to bed until they got in. I changed into my pjs and bunny slippers and put on my robe. I went back downstairs and turned on the TV again. I was fighting to stay awake when they came in. I said good night and went to bed.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-Six

    I was back at work and was walking down the back hallway I walked out the exit and was approaching the dumpster. I was surprised to find a crowd of people looking into it. They didn't seem to notice me as I approached. I couldn't make out any details on the people, as they were all blurry. I could hear them talking and pointing into the dumpster. No one seemed to notice my presence. I moved through the crowd and looked in. I saw what looked like the body of a young woman, her hands were taped behind her back, and she appeared to be dead.

At first she seemed to be all fuzzy and out of focus, almost like when they blur out the face of a suspect on TV. Slowly her face became sharper into focus. I gasped in horror….it was my face.

I tried to pull back but couldn't. I turned away and suddenly I was the one lying there in the dumpster. Everyone was now looking at me and taking photos and writing down notes. The other people became clearer and I could see that they were policemen. I heard one say, "I think she's been dead for five hours."

I tried to move, but couldn't. I tried to talk, and then scream, but nothing came out. I wanted to let them know I was alive. I couldn't move or talk. They pulled me out of the dumpster, totally limp, and set me on a gurney. They examined me and discussed the cause of my death. I saw them probing around my throat. One said that it looked like a hunting knife caused it. I tried to scream or move or anything, but nothing worked. They then began to cover me up with a sheet, and that is when I woke up.

I was crying hysterically as I threw back the sheets on my bed. I sat up and moved to the edge of the bed. I fumbled for the light and almost knocked it over. The light cut into the darkness and made me feel safer. Slowly, I gained emotional control and began telling myself that it was only a dream. I began to repeat this over and over again, as if the words would make me feel better.

Reaching for the notebook that Cat had given me, I began to write furiously in it. I wanted to record all the details before they faded. The dream was so vivid and detailed. I actually reached up to my throat to feel for a wound. I was so engrossed in my writing that I failed to notice my door opening.

"You all right, honey?" asked Mom.

I looked up at her and it must have been obvious that I'd had another bad one. Mom came in and sat on my bed next to me. Her arm around me made me feel much better. I explained my dream and handed her the notebook.

"That must be why I've freaked out so many times while I was dumping the trash. There must be some association in my mind between how Jason dumped me and the dumpster at work," I announced.

"That sounds logical," added Mom. She then pulled me closer to her. I began to cry softly again. Mom didn't say a word, she just held me and stroked my head.

I guess I fell asleep in her arms. I woke up later and I was back under my covers. I checked the clock and saw that it was after 10:00 AM. I was about to jump out of bed in a panic when Mom walked back in.

"I called Karen Buford and Cindy and cancelled your meetings. They totally understood why you couldn't see them today. I also talked to Jenny about what happened."

    "Thanks. I can't believe that I slept this late."

    "Jenny will be here at noon, you have plenty of time to shower and eat."

    I took her up on the suggestion and got out of bed. I had to admit that the extra sleep made me feel better. After a shower I got dressed, I selected a new floral pattern dress. I wanted to look nice.

Sam was reading the paper when I came downstairs. I went over and kissed him good morning.

I grabbed a glass of OJ and sat down at the table. It was raining softly outside and the feeder was presently abandoned.

Mom asked me if I wanted anything to eat, and I told her that I wasn't hungry. She insisted that I eat something, so I had a bagel with cream cheese. There was some more small talk. We were all dancing around the real topic.

"I'm okay with us talking about last night." I really wasn't, but I knew that it was a good idea to talk about it.

"Who had the idea to record the dreams?" asked Mom

"Cat, who else?" I said with a smile.

We talked for a while. I guess they just wanted to reassure me that they loved me and would always be there for me.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-Seven

    Jenny arrived and Mom and Sam left. They told me to call when we were finished.

"How about we go up to your room to talk?" suggested Jenny.

"Okay, but be prepared, it isn't very neat," I warned.

"A teenager with a messy room? That does sound disturbing," she retorted in a ultra-serious tone.

The joke helped to break the tension.

She sat down in my computer chair and I sat on the bed. I watched as she looked around my room.

"I like that," she commented, as she pointed to my banner from school.

"It's a constant inspiration to me. And it's a reminder of that I have some great friends who care about me."

    "So, tell me about your latest nightmares."

    Right to the point, I thought. I opened up the notebook and read my descriptions of each dream. I then went into my feelings regarding the dumpster and its significance to my problems.

"You may be right in your theory, Erika. I'm sure it was frightening when Jason threw you in that dumpster. I want you to tell more about it."

    I went into a retelling of what had happened as I'd struggled to get free. I initially told it like I was on the stand. I kept my emotions in check and was in control. Jenny however sought to get my true feelings out and she peppered me with questions. I then relived the events as I described them and all the anger and fear came back. I held nothing back and let it all out. I suddenly remembered the pain, the smells, the fear, and the humiliation. The emotional torrent had caused me to break down in tears, but it felt good and freeing. She came over and held me as I cried and poured out my emotions.

She directed me to the bathroom and I cleaned up. I didn't feel so bad about letting out my emotions. I washed my face and went back out into the bedroom.

Jenny explained that I wasn't cured or anything like that, but I had taken a huge step towards recovery. She reminded me she'd told me initially that this would take time.

"I know. This is so much to deal with. I just want to get on with my life and not worry about what will be the next thing to trigger some episode related to the attack. Jason got off easy, at least he knows when his sentence will be over."

    "You're doing the right things. Don't isolate yourself or abuse yourself. You've handled this better than many patients that I have who are older and more mature; and they aren't also dealing with going through gender reassignment," she explained.

"Thanks for the pep talk, coach!"

    We agreed that I'd continue to see her twice a week for now. She also agreed with me about leaving group therapy. It had served its purpose. Jenny told me that Karen had said that it was a very negative group and she was working on ways to improve their attitudes.

I felt better, but I now felt that I needed some way to take out my anger. Jenny said that she had an idea, but that she wanted to run it by Mom and Sam first. I handed her the phone and went downstairs.

"They agreed to my idea," said Jenny.

"So what is it?" I asked.

"I want to keep it a surprise for now," she said. Her cell phone rang and she gave a couple of quick yes and no answers. "I think you'll be more comfortable if you go change. I recommend jeans and comfortable shoes."

    I went upstairs and changed. My mind was racing as I tried to figure out what her plan was. I came downstairs and saw a police car pull in our driveway. I was pleased to see Officer Bell walk up to the front door.

I went over and let him in. "Hi, Erika!"

"Hi, Officer Bell!"

    "Well, are you ready to go?" he asked. He then leaned over and whispered to me, "By the way, you can call me Tom."

"Go? Go where?" I asked.

"You'll see." He cracked a small smile.

Jenny walked outside with us. She gave me a hug and said that she'd talk to me on Tuesday. I got in the police car with Tom. We drove out of town. I was curious about where we were going. Tom kept the location secret.

We pulled off the main road onto a private road that was blocked by a locked gate. There a big sign stating that this was city property and that there was no trespassing. Tom got out and unlocked it and drove us in and then relocked it behind us. The mystery deepened!

We drove down a dirt road until we reached an opening. He pulled the car into a small parking lot next to a trailer. It was obvious that this was a firing range. On one side of the field was a standard practice range. The opposite side was different. There were old cars and trucks parked in the field. There were also some old metal dumpsters and some large freight containers. There was a high stone cliff at the end of the field.

"This side is our tactical range. We use it for more realistic practice. The chief said we could use it this afternoon as a favor to the DA," Tom informed me, pointing to the field with the old cars and dumpsters in it.

At first I wasn't sure what he meant. Then I watched as he took several gun cases out of the trunk. He also took out a bag and several boxes of ammunition.

He set the guns down on a stand facing the tactical range. He took out some goggles and some hearing protection earmuffs.

"So, have you ever shot a gun?" he asked.

I shook my head no.

  "No problem, I'll show you what to do. Dr. McCall felt that this would be a good stress release for you. She asked us about it earlier this week. The DA's added request helped make up the chief's mind."

    "She asked earlier this week?" I asked. I was stunned.

"Yes, why?" he asked.

"No reason," I smiled. It came to me that Jenny had wanted me to make the connection myself.

Tom showed me how to safely shoot the various guns. He was a good teacher, and I felt very confident as I aimed the handgun down range at the dumpster. I had to admit that it felt good as I fired at it. I got a rush when I hit it.

Tom then handed me a rifle and helped me aim at a different dumpster. I felt a feeling of satisfaction as I hit it again and again. Tom then handed me a semiautomatic rifle. It was more powerful, and it allowed me to put a few more holes and dents in the dumpster, and also a lot of holes in the ground!

After a nearly an hour out there, I felt like I had worked off a lot of stress. I didn't even mind picking up all the brass shells with Tom. I hoped that this would end my war with dumpsters forever.

Back in town, Tom dropped me off at my house. I gave him a big hug and thanked him. Sam and Mom were waiting for me and they asked me how I felt. I told them better and thanked them for their help. I couldn't wait to talk to Jenny on Tuesday and thank her for setting up such an interesting form of therapy.

That night I had a normal night's sleep without incident. My dreams returned to the usual nonsense with debatable meaning. Maybe that particular demon had been exorcised and would not trouble me anymore. I knew that my recovery wasn't complete, but I knew that I could overcome the problems.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-Eight

I woke up Sunday feeling refreshed and renewed. I knew that I was on an upswing and that the latest problems were behind me. However, I didn't want to totally forget them. I needed to be aware that similar battles would have to be fought. The war was far from over.

I was the first one up as usual. I fixed my tea and toasted a bagel and read the paper. The birds were all over the feeder. Sam had told me the names of a few of them. I recognized the small yellow ones as goldfinches. I also noticed a small brown rabbit in yard. He was munching on some grass. I joined him in breakfast and took a bite from my bagel.

I heard them stirring upstairs, so I turned on Sam's coffee maker. By the time they came down the pot was filled.

They came down together. Sam thanked me for having the coffee ready.

"So, how did you sleep last night?" asked Mom

"Great, I feel so much better, thanks." I had heard her peek into my room in the middle of the night.

They joined me at the table and we shared the papers. Since Sam had moved in, we had added the Sunday New York Times to the local paper. I got a kick out the entertainment section and seeing all the ads for movies and shows.

Cindy called and asked if I wanted to go to dinner with her after work. Mom thought it was a great idea. Cindy also said that she'd pick me up to take me to work.

Work went great and even the dumpster wasn't a problem. It must have heard what I'd done to its relatives out at the firing range!

After work Cindy took me back to her house for dinner. Her husband was out of town on business, so it was just the two of us. I helped her prepare dinner. She cooked some chicken breasts in a wine sauce. I found out that Cindy, like Terri, really enjoyed cooking.

As we ate, we talked about coping and dealing with the trauma of being assaulted.

"I'm happy that you got over your latest problem. That was a unique way of coping with stress."

"It was also a lot of fun. I really liked the semi-automatic rifle. Too bad he didn't have a machine gun!" I said with a laugh. I took a bite of the chicken; it was delicious!

"So were you just shooting at the dumpsters, or did you have a different target in mind?" she asked, "You can be honest with me."

"I must admit that I pictured Jason at the end of the barrel a few times," I felt a bit guilty about admitting that.

"Good. You can't hold in the rage that accompanies this sort of crime. It will only fester in you and turn you bitter and angry at the world. I was taught to forgive and forget. I tried that and it nearly destroyed my marriage and me. I blamed myself for what happened. I'm at peace now, but I've neither forgiven nor forgotten my attacker. I've spoken against him being released three times at his parole hearings."

"If you don't mind me asking, where did you get attacked?" I asked.

Cindy smiled. "I don't mind. I was attacked while my husband was out of town on a business trip. My attacker broke into our apartment and raped me. He made the mistake of making too much noise, and my neighbors called the police. He was caught as he tried to flee the scene."

I sat there in silence.

"It took me a long time to feel sexually comfortable with my husband. He also felt a lot of guilt for being out of town. Thankfully, we worked through our issues and stayed together," explained Cindy. She had a look of great satisfaction on her face. "We must have done something right, because we raised three kids together."

"Three kids?" I asked. I was shocked.

She walked over and picked up a framed family portrait. "Yes, Stacy, my youngest graduated, from Central last year and she's now a freshman at Lehigh. Her older brothers, Danny and Tim are in the navy."

I began to laugh. "I'm sorry, but I thought you were in your thirties!"

Cindy laughed. "Oh, Erika! Don't apologize for that! I've just taken really good care of myself. Actually, I'll be forty-five in August."

I laughed.

"Seriously, you should always take care of yourself. It's a great way of feeling good about yourself," added Cindy.

We talked for a while on various aspects of handling the stress and associated issues. I appreciated Cindy's concern and suggestions. She proved that someone could function and thrive after an assault. She was an excellent role model for me, unlike some of the women in my support group.

"Do you still have episodes like I had?' I asked.

"Not for a long time, thankfully. I've had nightmares, but the worst part was that I pushed my husband away. Thankfully, he stayed with me and we have a normal marriage again."

"I broke up with my boyfriend at the time, but it has seemed to worked out for both of us. He's dating a friend, and I'm in love with Laura."

"If you don't mind me asking, how do you see yourself sexually right now?" asked Cindy as she cleared away the dinner plates. "Oh, do you want some tea or coffee?"

"Tea, please," I said. I got up and helped her. "My sexuality is kinda complicated. I guess I'm bisexual. But since I see myself as female, I doubt if I could play the male sexual role. Does that make sense?" She handed me a mug and a box of different teas. I picked out a bag of Earl Grey.

"So, you really are transsexual then? I've known a lot of the girls from school and the competition, but you're the first I have known that was really transsexual. I must admit that I can't imagine you ever as a boy. How did you ever get by?"

"I look back and can see how I was in denial. Thanks to Jenny, so many things in my past make sense." I moved back to the kitchen table and sat down. A black cat came into the kitchen and rubbed up against my legs. I reached down and began to pet it.

"How's it going with the hormones?" she asked. "By the way, that's Vickie; as you can tell, she's very friendly."

Vickie hopped up in my lap and made herself at home; I continued to pet her. "So far I haven't noticed any change. I feel more at ease, but that is most likely just knowing that I'm taking them."

"You can shoo her off your lap if you want; she can be a real pest at times. Don't be so sure about the hormones and your attitude. Your feeling of ease may be due to the hormones, they are powerful drugs. I'll bet that you're probably checking your chest daily too."

"Twice a day actually. Don't worry about Vickie. She isn't a bother. I'd love to have a cat." Vickie's purring got louder as I scratched her behind the ear.

"I do some volunteer work at the animal shelter. Come down some time, we always have some lovely cats and dogs. That's where Vickie came from. Besides she's been a wonderful help. Animals can sense when you are in pain and can help you cheer up."

Vickie's purring sounded like a little motorboat.

"It must be exciting to go through puberty again," remarked Cindy. "This time nature is getting it right."

I nodded. "My turn for a question. Why are most people around here so accepting of girls like me?"

"The question should be why aren't other places more accepting. Why should it matter to me if you have the need to live in a gender different than the one you were born with? I think that over the years people have seen that the world hasn't ended because of people transitioning and that those who do change are so much happier."

I sat there petting Vickie as I thought about her answer. If Vickie had something to add to the conversation, she kept it to herself.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Forty-Nine

I woke up Monday morning and could hear it raining outside. I'd had another night without nightmares. I'd taken a few of the empty brass shell cases and put them on my desk. They acted as my good luck charms to keep away evil dreams. I guess once you know what is causing the fear, it isn't so scary anymore.

I was in a good mood even though it was gray and rainy. During breakfast I brought up the idea of getting a cat. Sam didn't care, or least he acted like he didn't care. I knew that he loved animals and wildlife. Mom said that she'd think about it, but if we got one it would be an indoor cat and it would be fixed. She also said that it would be my responsibility to clean the litter box. She also said that we should wait until after they got back from Philadelphia. That sounded like a yes to me.

"Oh, when do you think we can go car shopping?" I asked. I figured it was time to cash in on the bet.

"We've been talking about that. I'd prefer you wait until you are sure about the scholarship so that you can go to college, but since we had a deal you can start car shopping," Mom reluctantly agreed

"I'll help you pick out a good one," added Sam.

"Okay, I'm holding you to that." I was very excited about the possibility of having my own car!

I was wearing a tan skirt and a green pullover top. I didn't mind wearing skirts and dresses now that the weather was getting warmer. I was expecting Ms. B to shift the dress code any day now.

I looked at my planner for the new few weeks. My weekly schedule was pretty much the same. I still worked on Mondays, Thursdays, and Sundays, and I helped Coach on Wednesdays and Fridays. I had therapy with Jenny on Tuesdays and Saturdays. I hoped to be back to once a week therapy again soon. I was out of group. I'd thanked Karen for all her help.

Big events coming up included the charity dinner a week from Saturday night and Sam and Mom's trip to Philadelphia. They'd be leaving the Sunday after the dinner and they wouldn't be back until the following Saturday. Two weekends later was Prom! I figured that Ms. B had something else planned for us before the end of school.

At work that night we were pretty busy with women coming in for dresses and items for the dinner. Cindy said that Mrs. Lincoln's rental business had been packed over the weekend. I told Mel and Cindy about the movie.

"Are you sure it was her?" asked Mel.

"It had to be. I watched the scenes with her in them at least six times!"

"That's pretty cool. She never ceases to surprise me. Can I borrow the tape?" asked Mel

"Sure, I have in my bag. I'll give it to you after work."

I really wanted to ask Mrs. Lincoln about the movie, but was afraid that she'd think I was prying into her past.

When I got home that night, Mom and Sam were already having dinner. Sam had made up a pot of chili, and it was perfect for a rainy night. He even baked some cornbread to go with it.

I tasted it and it was delicious! "This is really good, Dad. There's a flavor that I can't place, what is it?"

"Beer. I put in several bottles of beer. Don't worry, the alcohol cooks off." He seemed happy that I liked his chili.

It really hit the spot. I asked if there was any mail for me. Mom still screened the mail, as there was still the occasional hate letter left over from the trial. I found it very strange that someone would write a letter to someone they'd never met just to say how much they hate them. Especially from people claiming to be religious.

"It's still on the hall table; I never checked it," stated Mom.

I went out and picked it up. There was the usual junk mail and a few bills. However there was also a large thick envelope addressed to Eric Walters. I brought it in and showed it to Mom and Sam. There was no return address and it was postmarked from out of state.

"Should I open it?" I asked apprehensively.

"Why don't you let me see it first," suggested Sam.

I eagerly handed it to him and watched as he opened it up. There was a letter from some minister. He said that he had befriended Jason in prison was convinced that he was a changed person. He asked me to ask the courts for either a reduction in sentence or a pardon. He went on and on about how I should forgive Jason and allow him to live a free and happy life.

The second part of the letter read more like a threat. It said that he was prepared to lead a group that would make Jason's story very public and that it might have an adverse effect on my life and that of my family. He went on saying how difficult it would be on me if my sinful life were exposed to the world. He wrote that he would expect my response in the next week. He claimed that he knew that there hadn't been a sexual assault and Jason had only pleaded guilty to save me from any more pain.

The letter included copies of letters from other groups offering support for Jason. The minister went on to say that a copy of the package had been sent to the school. Sam recognized several of the groups. He said that they often showed up to protest gay rights.

"This sounds like blackmail," stated Mom. She looked at the letter and I could see how angry she was getting.

"I'll take this to work. I know someone who can help us with this. While my office can't do anything unless he actually breaks the law, I can do things as your future father. We've dealt with these types before. I don't know this particular man, but I know his type. He expects you to be cowed into giving in and then he'll claim a victory for his group. He doesn't care about Jason or you; it's just to help his fundraising," explained Sam.

"So he is doing this just for money and he is attacking my morality? Talk about hypocritical!" I was really pissed.

"As I said, we've dealt with these groups before. We have allies on our side too. I'll make some phone calls tomorrow morning. I have a friend who loves taking on people like this, she'll be very interested in helping us," said Sam.

"So what will happen? I don't want the town to become a zoo," I answered.

"We'll respond to them and tell them that any further contact or intimidation will result in legal action. That sometimes stops them. If they insist on pressing it, then it could get a bit ugly," explained Sam.

I looked at the letter and the name of the "minister." I thought I'd do a little research online and check him out. I excused myself and said good night. I checked on the Internet and found several references to Reverend Charlie or "the Rev." That wasn't his name, but even today, I think so little of him that I don't want to mention his real name.

He was a minor player in the hate/religious-right movement and apparently was trying to move up. He apparently was a mail order minister without a church. I found he did have a website that seemed to mostly revolve around raising money for his "church." The website was filled with anti-gay slurs and comments. I copied all the websites and articles down on a CD. I went down stairs and saw that Sam was still in his office.

"Hey, Dad, I thought you'd find this interesting," I said, handing him the CD.

"I thought that's what you were doing. So what do you think?" asked Sam as he leaned back in his chair

"I think that you'll eat his lunch if he is stupid enough to take us on."

"I called my friend and she wants to talk to you. She'll be in town Wednesday."

"What's her name?" I asked as I sat down on the edge of his desk.

"Her name is Marlene Hamilton. She works for a legal defense group that tries to counter these so-called religious associations and other hate groups. Don't worry, you'll love her!"

"What time?" I asked

"I suggested that you two go out to dinner. I know she likes pizza." He looked at his watch. "You'd better get to bed, your mom will kill me if I keep you up much later."

I kissed him good night and went to bed. I slept well, knowing I had an army to protect me.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty

I'd e-mailed Cat and Laura and told them the latest. The assault and its aftermath were like some monster that refused to stay dead. It kept coming back in some new horrible form. My being transgendered added a special touch to this latest mutation. I found it obscene that some "holier than thou" jerk was trying to exploit my misfortune just so other misinformed jerks would send him money. I hoped that Sam's friend would scare him off. The good thing was that this latest problem didn't bother my sleeping. I had a good night's sleep.

When I got to school, I went immediately to Ms. B's office. She smiled when I came into her office.

"I was expecting you. Mrs. Lee told me about the letter she received yesterday. She's on the phone with Sam Warren right now."

I was horrified! This nightmare was creeping into my life at school too!

We walked to Mrs. Lee's office. She was waiting for us and waved us in.

"I want you to know that we are going to put up a united front against this person. Mr. Warren told me about his friend. I only know her by reputation, but from what I've heard she is no one to take lightly," stated Mrs. Lee.

"The woman who set up this scholarship provided for events like this. She set up a legal defense fund for just this eventuality. We have contacted our lawyers and they're studying the letters. This so called reverend has no idea of the what he is facing," added Ms. B.

"I'll be meeting with all the remaining contestants today and explaining to them what's going on. Additionally, a letter will be sent home explaining the situation and the school's position," explained Mrs. Lee.

I walked out feeling good about what was happening. The rest of the day went by without incident. Laura gave me a ride to therapy. She didn't mind taking me there as we went for cappuccinos afterward. She also said that she liked to get caught up on the latest scandal sheets. Someone in Jenny's office stocked the waiting area with those grocery store newspapers that had stories on aliens, Bigfoot, and movie star scandals.

Jenny had me talk about what was on my mind. I started by thanking her for setting up my stress release on Saturday.

"So, I take it that you were waiting for me to make the dumpster-nightmare connection?" I asked.

"It works better when the patient figures it out on their own. Just like you did with being transgendered," answered Jenny.

"I also liked the therapy you arranged," I remarked.

"I know it was a bit unorthodox, but I thought it might work."

We then talked about the threat. Jenny admitted that this was a new tactic, but she had seen the damage these types have done.

"Back when the AIDS crisis was at its very worst, they showed up at funerals with signs saying the person who'd just died deserved it and that they were going to hell, regardless of how they'd been infected. They also show up at funerals for victims of anti-gay/anti-transgendered violence. They've also shown up at court cases involving gays and transgendered people. To be honest, I was surprised that they weren't here for your trial," she remarked

"What I don't understand is why they do this? Do they really think that they are that morally superior to everyone else?" I asked.

"Unfortunately, yes. I also think that they get off on the power of leading their brainless sheep followers. They use religion as a front. What they crave is power. They also like to view the world in black and white terms. It's easier for them to comprehend things. But that doesn't mean that you should underestimate them. Keep me informed; I want to help you however I can," asked Jenny.

Jenny decided that we'd stay at two sessions a week until this latest crisis passed. I joked that when she wrote her life story I'd better get a whole

Chapter.

After the session I met Laura out in the reception area. She showed me an article in one of the scandal sheets. "You need to go here!" she giggled.

I read the article, shook my head, and tossed the paper on the table, "What a bunch of garbage!" The article was about some woman who claimed that her husband had been turned into a Vegas showgirl by some magical slot machine out in the desert. I really wondered about the people that wrote those stories!

We went down to Spencer's and found an open seat on the couch. I loved coming here, especially with Laura. We talked about school and my session with Jenny. Laura also needed to vent because of all the planning for prom and grad night. We also talked about the fact that May started next week. The school year was really flying by.

Laura suggested that we go get something to eat before it got too late. We were discussing our options when we saw Coach Chambers walk in holding hands with Jenny. They saw us and waved. I'd suspected that they were more than friends, but this was the first proof I had. I was happy because I liked them both. In some ways, it made me trust Jenny even more, knowing she'd dealt with similar issues of being different.

After they got their coffee, they walked over and joined us. "Good evening, girls. I see you beat us over here," greeted Jenny.

"Yes, Laura introduced me to this place and now it's a post session tradition," I replied.

We talked for thirty minutes or so before we had to leave. It was nice having such good role models.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-One

We went back to my house and we warmed up some of Sam's chili. It was just getting hot enough when he got home.

"We've having your chili for dinner, you want some too?" I asked.

"Sounds great. Chili always tastes better once it's had a chance to age. Hi, Laura, how're you?" greeted Sam from the front hall. "I'm going to run upstairs and change, be right back."

"Hi, Sam," responded Laura. "It's so cool that the DA is going to be your dad. And what's even cooler is that he lets me call him by his first name!"

When he came down, he was wearing jeans and had on a gray Philadelphia Police Dept. T-shirt. He went into the fridge and grabbed a beer. He sat down at the table and joined us as we waited for the chili to heat up.

"I got a call from Marlene Hamilton today," Sam stated as he got up to check the chili. He found that it was hot enough and he filled our bowls. "She'll update you on this group when she arrives."

"Could I be there? This sort of affects me too," asked Laura.

"I don't see a problem with that," said Sam. He handed us each a steaming hot bowl of his chili.

"So, where did you meet her?" I asked. I took a taste of the chili; Sam was right, it was better than last night.

"We took some law classes together. She could have been a damn fine trial lawyer, but she chose a different path. She loves to stand up to bullies." He smiled as he talked about her.

"So, if these groups do come here, what will the local churches do?" I asked.

"Depends a lot on public feelings. Sometimes they come out in support of the person or group being confronted and sometimes they stay silent," he said. He took a piece of cornbread and passed the basket around. "Sometimes they support the hate groups."

"What do you think they'll do here?" I asked.

"I'd be shocked if they didn't support you and the school. This community here supports the program and has seen the positive results. He might do better by protesting somewhere else."

Just then we heard the front door open and Mom came in.

"Mmmm, that smells good," she stated from the hallway. She walked in and greeted us all. "I'm so hungry. The professor only gave us a five minute break."

Mom sat down as Sam got her a bowl and something to drink. I got a kick out of the way Sam treated her. He was a real gentleman and it was great to see how deeply in love they were.

We updated Mom on the events related to the threat.

After dinner I walked Laura to the door. She smiled and pulled me close to her and we kissed long and passionately.

"You have a great family, Erika!"

"I know. It's really a family. I can't imagine Sam not being here."

"See you tomorrow." We kissed again and I watched her walk out to her car. She waved and drove away.

Sam told me that he'd take Laura and me over to Marlene's hotel room the next evening at 6:00 PM. I would have just enough time to get home and change from track.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Two

I was excited about meeting Marlene. I was hoping that she could prevent this issue from getting any bigger. School and track practice blew by in a total blur. All I can tell you was that I know that I was physically in school that day.

Laura drove me home and we went upstairs to change. I slipped on a short denim skirt and a blue top. Laura thought I looked cute. It's so funny how attitudes change. I really was happy to be called cute now.

We went downstairs and waited for Sam. I looked through the mail and found another envelope from the Rev. I decided to wait until Sam came in before opening it. It wasn't as thick as the last one.

"Here he comes," Laura stated, as she looked out the front window.

I looked outside and saw Sam's car pull into the driveway. We walked out to join him. We got in the car and I handed him the envelope. He opened it and read the letter.

"It seems that our friendly harasser wants to remind you that your decision will free an innocent young man and it might prevent your eternal damnation. He also says that if you don't send him the letter by the end of the week that he'll make life very difficult for you, your mother, and your school."

"Why doesn't this jerk get a real life?" grumbled Laura. For the first time, I was seeing Laura get very protective of me. It made me love her even more.

"I'll give this to Marlene. She'll find it very useful. Look, I know this isn't easy but we'll get you through this," comforted Sam

"I know that. I'm just glad that this didn't come up while I was having my problems. It would have made it more difficult to recover."

We arrived at the hotel and Sam took us to Marlene's room. Marlene met us at the door and Sam introduced us. She was a short thin woman in her thirties with her long brown, curly hair in a ponytail. She had a very comforting smile that made me instantly trust her.

We entered her room. It had double beds and one of the beds was covered in papers, as was the table and the top of the dresser.

"Don't worry about my mess. I have a tendency to spread out," she apologized.

Sam handed her the latest letter. She looked at it and shook her head.

"He's using a format that is used by many of these types. I wonder if they give them a form letter and let them fill in the person to be harassed. May I keep this?" she asked. "You'll probably get another letter on Friday or Saturday.

"I'd like a copy when you get a chance. I'll leave you guys to talk. Call me tomorrow at work, okay?" said Sam.

Marlene said that she'd stop by his office tomorrow.

"So, Sam says that you two know a good pizza place?"

We walked out to the parking lot to her car. It was a green SUV. The back bumper had many political bumper stickers and logos. One said, "Doing my best to piss off the Religious Reich." There was also one of those Darwin fish on the back hatch.

"I know that this SUV is a gas hog, but I need the storage space. It's my office on wheels," she apologized.

"I imagine that you get a lot of interesting comments on your stickers," I remarked as I got in the front seat.

"Yes, I have. I am not anti-religion, just anti-extremist," she remarked. "There's a difference, although many don't see it that way."

We arrived at Guido's and got a booth. Marlene explained that she'd be sending the Rev a letter informing him to stop all correspondence with me and that if he continued legal action would follow. She said that she could bring many groups to my defense, ranging from the GLBT community to victim's rights groups. She went on to say that if this guy had half a brain he'd back down.

"If he had half a brain, he'd be smarter than he is right now," added Laura.

Marlene laughed. I could tell that she liked both of us.

"So, do you think that he'll back off?" I asked hopefully.

"It's hard to say, sometimes they do and sometimes they'll try to make a sneak attack. That is, they'll say that they are leaving you alone then they'll show up unannounced to protest. Of course, they'll make it a public protest to grab attention. This guy is new, so he'll probably try something, or else he'll lose all credibility," she explained

Our pizza arrived and we started eating.

"You're right, this is pretty good pizza for being way out here," stated Marlene.

"You came all the way from Philly for this?" I asked.

"Sure, I wouldn't miss a chance to help old Sam out. He's a good man and he really stands up for what he thinks is right."

I thought about what she'd said. If the Rev came here and protested, Sam would be dragged in by association with me. It could have a negative effect on his career. I didn't want to see people close to me get hurt.

"Are we doing the right thing by standing up to him?" I asked.

"Oh, absolutely. These creeps thrive on creating fear and hoping that no one opposes them. They are counting on the victim not fighting back. They love to pick on people who have already been through a lot of pain and suffering. When you stand up for what is right, you'll be surprised who comes to your side!" explained Marlene.

We finished dinner and Marlene drove us home. She told me that she would like to meet again later in the week. Laura suggested that she meet us in Spencer's Friday evening. She liked that idea.

When we got in, Sam asked us our opinions of her.

"She's something! I can see why you called her," I remarked.

"I like her a lot – but who pays her?" asked Laura.

"Her group gets grants from various sources as well as donations. You won't get rich in her line of work, but the job satisfaction is pretty high. Almost as good as being a DA," joked Sam.

"Why are you interested in her pay?" I asked Laura.

"I'm thinking of becoming a lawyer. I also like the idea of taking on social injustice."

"Well, I'm sure that Marlene would be happy to tell all about her career," smiled Sam.

Laura had to leave. I kissed her goodbye and told her that she'd make a great lawyer.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Three

Thursday we had a meeting for all of the "volunteers" for the charity dinner. I knew most of them. In addition to the Fab Five, Kristen, Tracey, Laura, and Cat had all been volunteered to help. I'm not really being fair. Most of us wanted to do this, but being teenagers we acted as if it was a great inconvenience.

Ms. B spoke to us while Mr. Kline talked to the boys. I saw that Paul, Mike, and Alex had all been selected. She told us that we would have a mandatory training session Saturday at noon. The dinner was being held in the banquet hall of one of the hotels. It was the largest facility in town. She also said that we'd be provided with our uniforms for the event.

"Excuse me, Ms. B, but do you know what the outfits look like?" asked Tracey.

"Yes. Don't worry, the outfits are very nice. You'll be wearing a black skirt, white long sleeve blouse, a black waistcoat, and a red bow tie. The boys are wearing something similar: black pants, white shirt, red bow tie, and black vest."

"Excuse me, Ms. B, but what's a waistcoat?" asked Ann

"It is a like a vest, but is cut lower in the front and is tighter around the waist," she explained.

"That means it will show off our boobs better," whispered Tracey. We all heard her and we starting laughing.

It really didn't sound too bad. I had worried that they'd have some stupid theme and put us in some strange costume. I was also relieved that there was no silly looking hat to wear.

"One last thing, girls, you'll need a pair of simple black high heels, preferably with three-inch heels," added Ms. B. "Also black stockings or pantyhose."

"Do the boys have to wear those too?" asked Cat, causing us all to laugh.

"No, make them wear five-inch heels!" suggested Tracey. The boys looked over at us, totally clueless about what we were laughing about. I was impressed that Tracey had told two jokes in the same day!

I wasn't worried, as I'd gotten pretty used to being in heels for work, although I could see that not everyone was happy about the prospect of being in heels all night.

Ms. B got the Fab Five together after the meeting to talk to us in private. She wanted to reassure us that the school was doing everything possible to protect us.

"This isn't right! I don't see how this asshole can just disrupt everyone's lives," complained Ann. "No one here has done anything wrong. Besides, Erika should be the one protesting about Jason's claiming that he's innocent."

That seemed to be the group sentiment. They all agreed that the Rev's threats would have no bearing on their being in the competition and that they'd join any counter-protest. It was cool to see everyone united. Little did I know how united the school was.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Four

Friday evening Laura, Marlene, and I were sitting on a couch in Spencer's, drinking cappuccinos and eating key lime pie. Marlene said that she had a lot to update us about.

"First off, the Rev only saw Jason once and, from what I could figure out, they only talked for five minutes. The guard on duty said that Jason wanted nothing to do with the guy. I also talked to Jason's family and they turned down an offer by the Rev to publicize the case," she explained.

"So, this guy is just an opportunist and not a very good one," asked Laura.

"It looks that way. I also contacted every house of worship in town and they all find his tactics reprehensible, so he won't find any support from them. I have a letter being sent to him tomorrow. It will include a list of signatures from various clergymen, groups, and businesses in the area stating that they oppose his actions," she added.

"So, is this over?" I asked.

"Maybe. He might still try something, maybe to coincide with some big school event, like prom or graduation."

"Maybe there will be a Klan rally somewhere on prom weekend that he'd rather attend!" quipped Laura.

Laura then began to ask Marlene about her organization. I got up and got another cup of cappuccino and checked the board for new messages. I was standing there, reading a review of Denise's group in the campus paper, when I heard a voice addressing me. I turned around and saw a pretty girl with brown curly hair standing there.

"Hi. I don't wish to interrupt. but is that Marlene Hamilton talking to your friend?" she asked.

I nodded. "Yes. it is. Hi, I'm Erika," I said, extending my hand.

"I'm sorry. I'm Lisa. I'm pleased to meet you. I didn't know Marlene was in town. Is she speaking somewhere?" she asked in a very excited tone.

"No. Not exactly. Would you like to meet her?" I asked.

"Oh, yes! We watched a documentary on her group in class," she exclaimed.

We walked over and I introduced Lisa to Marlene. Lisa was in awe of talking to Marlene. I listen to Lisa rattle off one case after another that Marlene had been involved with. I felt even better knowing that Marlene was on my side.

After Lisa left, I apologized to Marlene. "I didn't mean to embarrass you."

"Don't apologize. I plan on contacting the college for help if the Rev does protest. They have a pretty active GLBT student organization up here. It was also nice to meet a fan."

We talked a while longer before Marlene said that she had to go. She told me she'd stay in touch, and that I shouldn't worry.

Laura and I hung out in the college. We walked around and soaked in the atmosphere. Mostly we just walked around enjoying each other's company. The weather was very nice and it looked like winter had finally departed. We also talked about the dinner and practice Saturday afternoon. I had a meeting with Jenny early in the morning but would have plenty of time to be at practice on time. Laura said that there was going to be a party at Alex's barn after the practice. That sounded great, it would feel like old times. It would be our first party there since the championship party.

Laura decided that it was time for the weekly photograph of my hopefully growing chest, and we drove over to her house. I knew that meant we'd be making out soon!

"You know that you've been on hormones for almost a month," reminded Laura.

I took off my top and took my pads out of my bra. I then took my bra off. I stood in the position and Laura took my picture with her digital camera.

"I think you may be growing a little." She compared pictures from a few weeks ago to the latest. If there was any change, it was slight. But I did notice that my nipples seemed a bit more tender and sensitive. Laura began to stroke them with her fingertips. There was definitely something happening. She got a kick out my reaction.

"Just think that this will only feel better," she said as we began to kiss. We lay back on her bed and kissed and caressed each other. I loved Friday evenings!

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Five

Saturday morning, Jenny and I talked about everything that was going on. I had gone the whole week without a single nightmare or panic attack. Jenny was pleased and said that we could go back to once a week, which was fine with me. She told me that she'd like to eventually go to every other week, but that she wanted to take it slowly. Again, she warned me that there might be future issues to deal with.

Laura and Cat picked me up and we rode together to waitress practice. I think I liked this task because the scholarship contestants were included in the activity and not separate like the fashion show.

When we got there, I looked around to see if everyone in the Fab Five was there. There was a large crowd of students assigned to the event, so it was hard to find people. I still had doubts about Lisa. Denise was easiest to spot. Her white spiked hair stood out like a lighthouse's beam in fog. I saw Paul and Caroline together. They saw us and walked over.

"Guess what? We won that scholarship for our cartoon!" announced Caroline triumphantly.

We all congratulated them. I was so happy for them, as they really deserved it. I continued to search for the remaining contestants. I saw Ann talking to Ms. B. That left Lisa as the only one I hadn't seen. I was relieved to see Lisa walk in with Bill Fry, the class VP. They were holding hands. I pointed this out to Laura; she was as surprised as I was. Not that I minded, they made a good-looking couple.

Ms. B introduced Rob Granger, who was in charge of the dinner. He explained that we'd be divided into groups and assigned our tasks. He called off our names and had us go with someone from his staff. I'd thought we'd all be waiting on tables, but that wasn't true; some of us would do that, while others would assist in serving drinks, and the guys were all assigned as busboys.

I was assigned to wait on tables, along with Caroline, Laura, and Kristen. Cat and Tracey ended up with Rachael, working with the bartender. Denise and Ann were assigned to the coat checkroom.

We spent the next hour or so being trained in our various tasks. It wasn't that hard, and we were assigned two tables each. There would be eight people at each table. It didn't look too hard; especially considering everyone was having the same meal. We were taught how to properly serve and remove items from the table.

We were also measured and issued our uniforms. They were as Ms. B described them. I thought they were nice, although a little on the formal side. And as Tracey said, they did show off our boobs.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Six

After practice, we headed over to Alex's barn. Just being there brought back so many good memories. The weather was great, and it felt wonderful sitting out in the sun. There was a volleyball net set up in the back, and Laura and Cat went over to play. Alex's father had a big barbecue set up and was cooking burgers, hotdogs, and chicken. I joined Kristen and Rachael and got some lunch. We sat down on some lawn chairs and watched the game.

Because she didn't go out for any teams, I had forgotten how athletic Cat was. She was really good, and she led her team to two straight wins. We cheered them on as her team beat a team made up of mostly male jocks.

When I finished my burger, Alex dragged me out for the next game. He formed a team that included Mike and Rachael, and we ended up beating Cat's team in a very close game. Mike joked that my good luck status still worked for them. Alex said that I would have to come down to their football games in the future. I laughed and said that I'd donate a new shirt to the team. We held the court for two more games before losing.

It felt so good to just be having fun without any problems or stress, just normal teenage fun. When it got dark, we went in the barn and sat around and talked. The good thing about the parties at Alex's house was that there was no alcohol. We had just as much fun and there were fewer fights. I had no real desire to drink. Besides, I really didn't like beer that much. I liked wine and I'd had a glass on some special occasions. I was totally against smoking and drugs. Smoking was a waste, as I enjoyed running too much. And Mom was very anti-drug. She'd never told me why she was that way, but it had something to do with some friends in college. I knew she had some things in her past that she wasn't proud of, but I hoped she'd share them with me someday.

I sat and talked with several of the guys from the team, including Mike and Alex. Laura came over and dragged me away, she laughed and told me later that she didn't like the way they were flirting with "her girl." I kidded her for being jealous. It was very nice to be so totally accepted as a girl. I had to admit that I liked the fact that some of the most macho guys on campus were flirting with me.

We drove home a little after ten. I needed to get some sleep, as work was getting really busy. Between the prom and the charity dinner, we were swamped. I also had my American Lit paper to finish.

When I got home, Sam and Mom were at the kitchen table. They were planning their trip to Philly. They asked about the party and the practice. I showed them my outfit. Mom said it was much nicer than anything she'd worn when she waited tables. Sam said that he had just dropped his tux off at the cleaners. Mom had a nice black evening gown that she was going to wear.

"As expected, we got another letter from the Rev. It should be the last one," announced Sam.

"Anything exciting in it?" I asked. I had no desire to read it.

"No, just the same threats as before and a couple of misspelled words," remarked Sam. "I already faxed Marlene a copy of it."

"Well, I hope that he tires of this soon," added Mom.

"If he doesn't, Marlene's group is prepared to sue him," stated Sam.

We talked about their trip and I assured them that I would be safe. They both deserved to have a good time. I didn't want to be the reason for them to cancel. I told them that I'd be very safe with Cat and Terri.

I went upstairs and changed into my pjs and bunny slippers. The nice thing about accepting my feminine nature was that I could be open with my emotions. I also liked that I could dress for fun and comfort and not feel self-conscious about it. The slippers were goofy, but I really liked them, besides they were a gift from Paul.

I sat down at my computer. I wanted to work a little bit on my American Lit paper. I found that I did some of my best writing later in the evening. This paper was a breeze, as I really liked the two books I had read, unlike many of the students in my class! Ms. B found out that I liked reading Steinbeck, and she'd suggested that I read Travels with Charley next. I bought a copy of it, but I hadn't started it yet. I was saving it as a reward for finishing the paper. Sometimes you have to treat yourself.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Seven

The rest of the weekend passed without any incident. Work was really busy, so my five hours flew by. Sam, Mom, and I had a quiet dinner together. No problems, no issues, kinda boring, but nice.

That was pretty much the story for the following week. There were no more threatening letters from the Rev. My classes were great that week. I finished my American Lit paper early, and began to read Travels with Charlie. Great book by the way, I highly recommend it! Work was also a breeze. Again we were busy all week, so the time in the store flew by.

Friday after track, Laura and I talked Cat into joining us at Spencer's. I think that we all wanted to spend as much time as possible with each other. Starting Sunday evening, I'd be sleeping over at Cat's house. I'd just take a daily change of clothes. Cat said that the second bed was all set up; she also said that I'd better not snore! I felt a bit like a wimp for not being to sleep alone in the house, but Mom insisted that I stay at Cat's or she wouldn't go. Actually, I was happy that she insisted on this. There were still a lot of issues in my life, and I didn't want to face my fears alone at that time.

"So, when is the paperwork for your name change going to be filed?" asked Cat.

"In a few weeks."

"How do you feel about it?" asked Cat.

"Sort of mixed feelings. I'm happy that my name will be legal, but at the same time it's a bit sad. I never really hated being Eric. I've read a lot of accounts of other transgendered people and they often hate their previous life."

"I can understand your mixed feelings."

"Has your mom picked a new middle name for you?" asked Laura.

"Not to my knowledge. I told her your idea that she should make it a contest and have people post suggestions online. She wasn't impressed!"

We all laughed.

We sat there talking for a while. I then turned to Cat. "You know, you're the only student at Central who knew me as Eric."

"That's right, and even then you didn't stay a guy very long," added Cat.

"That's quite an honor, Cat," Laura stated. She turned to me. "I know that you've shown me pictures of you as a boy, but I still can't believe it. You're too much of a girl to have ever been a boy."

"I sometimes can't believe it myself," I answered softly.

"So, are you going to college in the fall, or are you still going to take some time off?" asked Cat.

"I want to get the surgery as soon as possible, so I can get on with my life. The surgery will put me down for a while, so I don't want to get too involved in school."

"How will you pay for it?" asked Cat.

"That's the big question. If I get the scholarship, then I won't have to worry about my education. Mom said that we could take out a loan or something like that. Medical insurance won't pay for it."

"It should," added Laura. "The surgery is just correcting a mistake."

"Too bad you aren't my lawyer now, we could sue," I laughed

"Seriously, they should pay for it," concurred Cat.

As we talked, Cat noticed that a woman was watching us. She nudged and whispered to me to look over at her.

The woman was tall and had short blonde hair. I doubted that she was associated with the Rev; she looked too normal and nice. I know that's rather simplistic on my part; villains and bad guys don't have to look evil.

She kept looking over at us. I just assumed that she either recognized me from the trial or she had made me for being TS. Again, I would have just preferred her coming over and talking. I have a hard time ignoring someone who is staring at me. I wondered who she was.

"So, do you think she'll come over here?" asked Laura, "Maybe she wants to steal you away from me!"

We giggled and tried to ignore her. Then Cat nudged me. "Here she comes," she whispered.

"Hi, I'm sorry I was staring, but a friend of mine said that I might find you here and I wanted to make sure it was you. You are Erika Walters, aren't you?" she asked in a pleasant tone.

"Yes, I am. Who are you?" I asked a bit cautiously.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Sandra Plummer. Nancy Bell said that I might run into you girls here. May I join you?"

I looked at Laura and Cat and they shrugged their shoulders, "Sure. These are my friends, Laura and Cat," I introduced.

"Pleased to meet all of you. Laura? Oh, yes, you're the senior class president. You've done a great job this year," she remarked

"How do you know Ms. B, and why do you want to see me?" I asked.

She smiled. "I guess I should explain. I've known Nancy since I went to Central High. I graduated from Central 6 years ago."

"That's cool, so why are you interested in Erika?" asked Laura.

"I guess you can say that I'm a fan. I only wish I could have done what you are doing right now."

It took a moment for what she said to sink in. "You mean that you were a contestant?" I asked. I was stunned.

"Yes, my year we made it to mid-November. I didn't have the nerve to continue dressing or even to tell anyone that I was TS, except Nancy. I transitioned when I went to college."

"That's wonderful. I'm very happy for you! So how do you know about me?" I asked.

"Nancy has been keeping us informed about the scholarship and the contestants who are transitioning," explained Sandra.

"Us?" I interrupted

"The girls who have transitioned have formed a little alumni group. It's very informal, and we mainly exist to be a support group and to assist the new girls, like you," she continued.

"So why have you waited this long to contact me?" I asked. "I made the decision to transition back in November."

"We were going to wait until after you graduated, remember this is an alumni group," she answered, with a sly smile. "Nancy felt that we could be of assistance now, considering the harassment you are getting."

"Thanks, but it looks like that storm has passed. But I am excited to meet someone who has transitioned. I have lots of questions for you!"

"I hope you're right, but these jerks are like cockroaches; they are hard to get rid of. As for the questions, I'm sure you do and I'll be happy to talk to you, but I think we can do that another time. Here's my phone number and e-mail. Feel free to call me some evening. I need to get going, I'm meeting some old friends for dinner."

"So you don't live around here?" asked Cat

"No, I live in Harrisburg now. I came up for the weekend to meet you and the others. Call me next week, okay?"

We hugged good-bye. I was very excited. Sandra was the first woman that I'd met who was like me. Well, she was the first that I knew was TS!

"I never would have guessed that she'd been a boy," remarked Laura.

"Neither would I! This is pretty cool." I placed the paper in my purse.

"So, I still wonder who is the third?" interjected Cat. "Sandra said that she was going to 'meet the others,' so there is still a mystery to solve."

"Yes! The game is afoot," I added.

We all started to laugh. Seriously, I was curious about who was number three, but I also respected her privacy. While Cat, Laura, and I had fun trying to deduce who it was, we had no intention of outing her.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Eight

We went over to Laura's and went up to her room. Laura wanted to get the latest photo. I told Cat that I didn't mind if she wanted to stay or if she wanted to see the pictures. She was curious and thanked me for being so open.

My nipples were definitely a bit swollen now and were more sensitive. No, they weren't huge and I was still pretty flat chested, but there was something happening. I had been on the hormones for almost five weeks now.

Laura downloaded the photo and we compared it to the first one taken several weeks ago. There was a little bit of noticeable change, or at least I thought so. I put my bra and top back on. I slipped in my breast pads. I'd be happy when they were retired.

"So how big do you think that you'll get?" asked Cat.

"The doctor said that I should reach a C-cup eventually, considering my age and the fact that most women in my family have big breasts. Of course, I have no idea about the other side of my family."

"I know this is a tender subject, but from strictly a medical standpoint have you thought about contacting your birth father? You should know his family's medical history," asked Cat.

"Actually, Mom did that after I was born. She had to use a lawyer to get the information, as he was afraid that she wanted money from him," I replied

"It's amazing," smiled Laura.

"What's amazing?" I asked.

"It's amazing that such a jerk could produce such a great person!"

"True, he fathered me, but Mom raised me. I'd like to give her the main credit."

Laura gave Cat and I a ride home. I thought about meeting Sandra. I really did have a lot of questions for her. The first thing I did when I got home was to fire off an e-mail to her to establish communications. It was great knowing others who had walked ahead of me. I also thought that someday I would be the one passing on info to the next generation.

 

Chapter One-Hundred-Fifty-Nine

We had to be at the hotel banquet room by 3:00PM. Cat and Laura came over in their uniforms. Mom took a photo of the three of us together. She thought the red bow ties were a nice touch.

We were assigned our tables and from the place cards we got to see whom we'd be serving. Thankfully, Mom and Sam were not at my tables. I'd have never lived that one down. I found out that Kristen was assigned to their table. I did have the chief of police and two members of city council at one of my two tables. My second table had Mrs. Lincoln. There was no need to mention anyone else. Fortunately, I was used to her so I wasn't too intimidated. Actually that was a lie, I was very nervous about serving her. Alex was assigned as my busboy.

I almost didn't recognize Denise. She'd dyed her hair an actual normal color, a light brown, and I told her that she looked very nice. Denise told me that it was only temporary and that she was bleaching her hair blonde again as soon as she could. She grinned and said that she had an image to uphold.

Before the guests arrived, we were formed up for a group photo. I think that most people liked the uniforms, even if they wouldn't admit it. They were pretty classy looking.

The cocktails were being served in another room, so we wouldn't have to start working until that was over. Rob said that we could expect the guests to be coming into the dining room around 7:30. We wouldn't start to serve until 8:00. He walked around and personally inspected each of our tables and us. He made little nit-picky adjustments. He would adjust someone's tie or move a salad fork over an 1/8^th of an inch closer to the plate. I think he just wanted to show us all that he was in charge and we were all high school kids

Around 7:20 people began to enter. Everyone was dressed up, most of the men were in tuxes, and the women were in evening gowns. I recognized many of the dresses. A year ago I didn't know one dress from another, now I could identify a dress by the designer from across a large banquet hall. I wonder what my old friends back in San Diego would say about my new fashion knowledge.

Once everyone was seated, I introduced myself to the people at the tables. Mrs. Lincoln gave me a knowing nod and smiled at me. Everyone was very cheerful and friendly. My second table was very similar. They were too busy having a good time to worry about me, which was great. When I was serving the salad, the police chief asked me my last name.

"It's presently Walters, sir." I said. "It'll be Warren soon."

"I thought I recognized you, Erika! So have Sam and your mother set a date yet?" he asked

"No, sir. I think they'll have a date after his trip to Philly," I replied.

"I'm very happy for all of you. By the way, did you enjoy the range?" he asked with a wink.

I smiled back and nodded. "It was great, thank you very much," I answered.

I had to get back to work, but it was nice to be recognized as the DA's future daughter.

The entrée was a chicken breast in wine sauce. Personally, I thought Cindy's chicken looked better, but everyone seemed to be enjoying it. It's interesting to watch people at a party while you are working it. I walked around the table and found that I was for all practical purposes invisible. I heard lots of interesting gossip as I picked up plates and poured coffee. I had a lot more respect for food servers, and since then I am a lot more careful about what I say when they are around.

After dinner and dessert, most people got up and began to mingle. Our biggest job then was filling coffee cups. Sam came over specifically so I could serve him coffee. He smiled as I filled his cup. I asked if wouldn't rather have a cup of tea. He playfully stuck his tongue out at me.

After everyone left, we assisted in the clean up. It went pretty quickly as we had so much help. Before we left, they gave us each a bag filled with coupons, discounts, and special offers from area business people. The gift bag was a nice little surprise. We were also reminded to bring our uniforms back to school by Wednesday. Before we left, we stood around and traded stuff from the bags.

A whole group of us went to a diner afterwards. We crammed into a couple of booths and ordered breakfast. There is something very enjoyable about eating eggs and bacon at midnight. I sat with Cat, Laura, Caroline, and Paul. Caroline told us that one of the guys at her table had made a pass at her. Paul was pretty pissed off about it. It was nice to see him being so protective of Caroline.

"So what time are Sam and your mom leaving tomorrow?" asked Cat

"They want to be on the road by ten. I'll come over after work."

"Great, this will be a lot of fun! Laura why don't you sleep over next Friday, that is if you can be trusted?"

"You're no fun. Okay, I promise, no orgies!" said Laura. We all broke out laughing.

We got home a little before one. Mom was waiting for me to get in. She really didn't mind about the time as I had called and told her where I was.

I went to bed and thought about my upcoming week. It would be fun staying over at Cat's house. I also thought about Mom and her first meeting with the future in-laws. I hoped that everything went well. I eventually drifted off into a deep restful sleep.

 

To Be Continued

  

  

  

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