Savannah Revisited
by Janet L. Stickney
I stood in front of the headstone with tears filling my eyes, remembering what had been. As the sun filtered through the leaves of the huge oak trees, the sunlight littered the ground with pinpoints of moving light as the wind weaved it's way through the trees, those same pinpoints of light splashing bright colors as it reflected from the marble headstones. A clattering chirp made my eyes wander to the tree, then as I watched, as a huge robin took flight, landing on the nearest headstone. I watched the bird as he thrust out his red plumage, cocking his head at me, no fear on the part of the robin because it knew that I couldn't reach him, but I saw the way the bird looked at me with a questioning look that seemed to ask why I was there, invading it's space. We stared at each other for a moment, then the bird flew into one of the huge oaks, returning a few seconds later. As the slight breeze ruffled my hair, the bird sat looking at me, I knew it was time to put my anger and hurt away and find a way to cope with my sorrow and get on with life. I left the flowers on the twin graves and started to walk away when the robin started to chirp. I looked up at the bird and saw the rhythmic nodding of its head, as if the bird was telling me I had done the right thing, that it was alright to find a way to have a life beyond the anger and immense sorrow I felt.
The house felt more than empty now that Michelle and Beth were gone, yet the ghosts of them were still vivid in my memory, remaining as a silent reminder, a hammer that beat against my psyche as I sat and looked at the pictures of my wife and daughter hanging on the wall. They were taken away from me, not only by a simple accident, but by a drunk driver. Their loss left me without the will to go on, my tears no sop for the loneliness I felt. I had struggled with their deaths for almost two months, yet no matter how hard I tried, I simply could not find a reason to do more than drink myself into a stupor and visit their graves. It was my sister Audrey that brought me to back life, giving me the reason I needed to get on with my life.
I was just 22, while Audrey is five years older than I am, an elfin bit of a woman, not more than 105 pounds, even after dinner. My sister and I had been close when we were younger, with Audrey almost like a second mother to me. That night she came tio visit me.
"This is doing you no good at all Jim and you know it. You need to get back to work, and I mean throw yourself into it until you get over all this! Sell the house and get a condo somewhere! There are too many memories here; all they do is drag you down, and all this drinking does is make you sick, and it sure won't bring them back."
She was right of course and I knew it. We hugged each other, and I tried to absorb some of her strength, hoping to forget the terrible nightmare I was living through, so at her insistence, I went to stay with her for a few days. Audrey had two kids, both of them just children, without the cares of older kids. Tom was 4 while Sara was 3. I settled into the spare bedroom, and went out to the pool to try and relax when Sara came rushing over and climbed into my lap, just like my own daughter had done, wrapping her little arms around my neck and just lay there against me. My arm, unbidden, went to her hair and I stroked her hair, again just like I always did with my own daughter.
"I miss them too Uncle Jim; but you still have me!"
Sara was to young to understand, all she knew was that I was unhappy, and offered herself to try and cheer me up. I held her tightly to my chest, soaking up the love and tenderness she so willingly offered me. I took the kids to the park the next day, and because a carnival was in town, Audrey had asked me to take the kids for the day, telling me it would be a good break. The bright streamers and raucous music wafted across the park, carried on the slight breeze as we walked across the street from the parking lot. The scent of hot popcorn, caramel apples and beer joined together, signaling to everyone that a good time was available. Balloons floated in the air while clowns walked along making small animals for the kids as they squealed with delight. I let them have some popcorn and a soda, then we walked along the midway towards the rides. Everyone in the crowd was smiling almost as one, and I began to smile and laugh whenever Tom or Sara laughed. It was a huge relief to not think of my missing family for a while and I soaked up the children's laughter, reveling in their joy.
Sara and Tom were on a ride, twirling around to the sounds of an organ when I saw the guy. He was sitting at a table, drinking a beer, his wife close by, sucking on a cigarette while talking. The man's laughter and her cigarette bobbing up and down as she talked somehow infuriated me, knowing what he had done, yet both of them acted as if nothing had happened, as if they didn't care at all that he had stolen my future away from me. I heard the ride come to a halt and the giggle of Sara as she ran up and grabbed my hand. Tom, more subdued, yet just as excited, wanted to try some other rides, and I reluctantly let them lead him away from the man and his wife. I never saw them again that day, but I knew in my heart that the man had no remorse for what he had done, none at all.
The warm, moist air drifted across my naked body as I lay sleeping, drawing me out of a deep sleep. The early morning mist shrouded the yard and I could smell the sweet scent of lilacs and the nearby coastal waters, and as I lay there with sweat forming on my lips, I knew that I could never rest until the man had paid, really paid, for what he had done. Like most all of us, I had an evil streak inside of me that was tempered only by my inner moral code and of course, the law. Now, as the weight of my loss and anger crept across my psyche, I felt as if I had no choice but to let my anger take charge, to step across my innate moral dilemma and leave it behind. I got out of bed and stepped into the cool shower, letting the water wash away any remnant of moral concern I had, starting to plan my attack on the man that had stolen my family, and hopefully making his wife suffer the way I did.
At only 5'7" and 140 pounds I was in no shape to take the man on physically, but there are many ways to wreck vengeance on someone; I could make the man an emotional wreck for example, and that was exactly what I decided to do. With renewed vigor, I pulled on some shorts and a shirt, put my sneakers on, and went to my car. The drive took less than thirty minutes, and choosing my spot carefully, I parked down the street from the man's house, in the shade provoded by a heavily moss laden tree, and simply waited. I had no clear plan, but I hoped to have one soon, and gathering information seemed to be the best way to formulate one. I didn't know what else to do. Just after sunrise I saw the woman leave the house, then twenty minutes later, the man left in his brand new car. It was just like the one he was driving when he killed my family. Following behind, I watched as the man pulled into a small bar. An hour later he pulled out and drove to his job. He worked in a small office next to a machine shop located in an area that was beginning to show signs of wear. It was a commercial area populated with a lot of small shops, body shops, machine shops, and so on. At the end of the street was the bar, he had stopped at. Nino's the sign said in bright red neon. I drove back to Audrey's house, packed up, and thanked her for letting me stay there.
"You have that look in your eye Jimmy, just what are you planning?"
I said nothing, yet my slow but seeing my growing smile, and knowing me as only a sister can, she knew that whatever it was, it was probably illegal, and more probably, it was aimed at relieving my pain.
"Listen Jimmy, I know that look, and whatever you're doing, don't do anything stupid, at least until you talk to me first...please!"
I simply nodded my head yes, gave her a hug, and left for home. The house was still silent, but I did not hear the muted voices of laughter and love, instead, I heard the loud voices of hate and revenge. I sat in my chair, the one my wife had bought special, just for me, and in the silence I let my mind wander, letting the dark forces guide me as I wondered how to hurt the man, and hopefully find solace and peace. Seeking refuge from my thoughts, I retreated to the one thing that always made me feel better, back to the time before I was a teenager.
The door opened quickly, leaving me no place to hide, so I stood there, rooted to the spot, completely dressed in her clothes. Audrey shut the door and looked at me, her brother. I looked like a clown in those clothes; they were way to big for me and draped from my body, hiding my shape, but not my instant shame or blushing face. Like a bad paint job, my makeup was juvenile at best, and adding to this, my short hair did nothing to hide the fact that I was obviously a boy. Neither of us said a word as I started to cower towards a corner, trying to make myself disappear, but Audrey wasn't about to let that happen and dragged me to the center of the room.
"I still have" she said softly, "my clothes from when I was your age Jimmy, let me get them for you."
What happened next totally shocked me. Under her guidance, I took off all of the clothes, washed my face, and with only a towel for protection, let her begin to help me get dressed once again. That was the first time the girl in my dreams came to life, a real live girl of just 12 years old.
In a swirl of perfume scented clothes and the deft fingers of my sister, I was transformed into the 12 year old girl I wanted to be and tried to become. She had started with pink panties that had some white lace trim, then a training bra lightly stuffed with old nylons. Over that came a ruffled white slip, then the dress, which was all blue with a white bib collar. On my feet my I wore white socks and a pair of her old white Maryjanes. On my head she had used an old hairpiece to make me look like a young girl, and on my lips I had the sweet taste of the pink lipstick. I stood in front of the mirror, unable to stop smiling at my reflection in the mirror, twirling around, making the dress fill out and then, settling back against my legs. I can remember vividly when Audrey had taken my hand in hers and led me out of her bedroom and out on the patio. Not only was it the first time I ever lef tmy room that way, it was my first time out of the house dressed as a girl, and even though we never left the yard, I was sweating hard, my fear of discovery still very much with me, because I knew that boys didn't wear dresses, and weren't supposed to like it, except that I did.
Over the next few years, as Audrey and I got older, I continued to play dress up as we called it, and Audrey kept helping me, so by the time she got married, I was quite able to dress as a teenage girl all by myself and not be detected by anyone, unless they were very sharp or I was very stupid. By then I had progressed to going out, shopping, eating, and so on. I always felt the fear of discovery tugging at my dress, but conquered that fear with a determination not to be undetected that bordered on a manic effort to be perfect. When I was a senior in high school, I met Michelle, simply the cutest girl in the entire school. We hit it off right away, started dating, and I slowly stopped dressing up rather than take the chance of losing her. I had not dressed up once since then, even though I thought about it more than once, quite often as a matter of fact, but always managed to set those feelings aside because of Michelle.
Now, with my anger driving me and my darkening desire for revenge so strong, my dream girl, the girl I had named Jill, once again popped into my mind, coming alive and wrapping her arms around me in a tight embrace. Whether it was a refuge from the pain and stress or a long suppressed need, I felt as if I had no other choice, even though it had been a long time since I had dressed as a girl. The relief I always felt when I was dressed as a girl, the total lack of masculine responsibilities and the calmness I always felt came rushing back, and the need to escape my situation drove me back to the dream of being a girl. I no longer had any clothes of my own, all I had were those of my wife, which meant that if I wanted to dress up, they would have to do. I knew that she was a bit smaller than I was, but we were almost the same height, so I went to the catalog to see just how much different we were. It looked hopeless as I thumbed through the catalog, but after taking some careful measurements, and checking her sizes carefully, I found that I could wear at least some of her clothes, more if I could lose about twenty pounds and wore the right undergarments. I had taken the first small step, now all I had to do was take the second.
As I sat there a plan began to emerge in my mind, but before I went any further I decided that I would have to craft a plan that would be as flawless as possible so I wouldn't end up in jail or worse. I began each morning by following the man to work, seeing the man stop at Nino's bar every monrning, then again before he went home. At night, in the privacy of my home, I began to try on my wife's clothes, again noting those that I could wear with minimal alterations to myself or the clothes, and those that would require more changes or new clothes or both. It took me almost two weeks to prepare, two long weeks in which I constantly wondered if I was doing the right thing, but driven by a hatred for the man that had stolen my family away, I found myself unable to back away from my plan, even though it was riddled with unsolved questions.
Using the catalog as a road map, I managed to take my own measurements, writing them down, then carefully comparing them to the list I had of my wife's clothes. Michelle wore a size ten, a 36 'B' bra, with a 24 inch waist, something I obviously didn't have; at best, my waist was 27 inches, but I was pretty sure that I could manage 24 with a corset of some kind. I was sitting in the family room surrounded by all of my notes, the catalogs strewn around the room like just so much debris when I heard the doorbell ring. Looking out, I saw Audrey standing there, a very determined look on her face. I wrapped a robe around myself to hide the panties I had on, and let her in.
Perceptive as always, Audrey looked around the room, and in less than a second saw all of the catalogs, and knew without question that I was going to become Jill once again. I could tell by the look on her face that the only question in her mind was not why, but when. I watched her as she looked at the open pages of the catalogs, then after scooping them up and looking at my notes, she found the reason I was doing this.
"You're going to become Jill again then go after the guy that killed Michelle and Beth aren't you!?" It was less a question than it was a statement, but, it was true, and I nodded my head yes. "And you're really going to do it as a woman?" Again, I gave her another nod of the head yes.
"Why don't you tell me all about this little adventure that you have planned Jimmy."
I sat back and looked at my sister, my only surviving relative, and felt not fear or dismay, but the love I had for her swelling in my chest. I outlined my plan for, and she listened to it carefully, without saying a word. When I was done, she pointed out several of the flaws in my plan, then suggested that if I wanted to do this, then maybe it would be more effective if I did it right.
"Living as a woman is not going to be as easy as you think Jimmy, not like before when it was only once in a while, but if you insist that this is the only way to get even, then I think that before you even consider going after this guy that you better live as a woman for a while, say two or three months! That way you can become used to the clothes and ways of women a little bit better! We do a lot of things differently you know." I wasn't shaken by her seemingly easy acceptance, only at how easily she picked apart my plan!
"You agree with me?" I asked, "With my plan? Usually you and I are on the opposite sides of things!" Without even a pause, she spoke up in that quiet, yet firm voice of hers.
"No, I do not agree with you Jimmy, I think it's dangerous, and maybe even stupid, but I know you well enough to know that no matter what I think, or say, you'll probably do this anyway, so I would rather be on the inside helping you out rather than on the outside trying to get you out of jail! If you let me, I think that together we can recreate Jill, but as a more mature, beautiful young woman. If you haven't forgotten them, I know that you already have the ability and already know all the mannerisms and so on, and you certainly have the drive to be perfect, so what you need to do is experience being a woman for a while before you embark on this little plan of yours."
I looked at her for some sign that she didn't mean it, but I knew that she did, her eyes said it.
"Okay Audrey, I guess we'll do it your way."
"I'll be by in the morning" she responded quickly, "and we'll take those measurements again. Then, because living as a woman is going to be hard enough as it is, and if you're really serious about this, then maybe you should at least have to put up with all the things women do! If you agree, we'll go see a friend of mine from college; we'll ask her about getting you a boob job, and see if she can help you besides that, okay?" We sat and looked at each other for a moment, then Audrey spoke up. "This man is what, 25?" I nodded my head yes, and said…
"That's why I think becoming a woman will be the answer Audrey. He's close enough to my age, I'm 23, so I'm sure it'll work, and his wife? Marianne? She is a spoiled little girl and always has been, and like him, she drinks, so I plan to use her to hit him, maybe when he's totally out of it."
"If you do this, you'll have to be perfect Jimmy, because one slip up and his father in law will tear your head off, and that's if your lucky! That family has enough money and clout that the old man could probably make you disappear! That's why you'll have to become as just as much a woman as I am!" I nodded my head in understanding, agreed to her suggestion, then she hugged me tightly just before she left.
The specter of what I was about to do, and all of the things that could go wrong invaded my dreams that night, and as I tossed and turned in the night, the forces of darkness came again, yet the very thought of having a more feminine body calmed my fears, chasing my common sense away with merely the puff of both a cold angry thought and the excitement of having a long cherished dream come true. I awoke as the early rays of the morning sun slid through the cracks in the blinds, making a slanted zebra like pattern on the floor. Standing in the shower I wondered who my sister's friend was, and just exactly how exactly she could help me, but I was determined, and after I dressed and made coffee, I went over my notes once again. Audrey showed up at 9, we had some coffee, then we drove to see her friend. Audrey wouldn't tell me how her friend could help me, other than a boob job, refusing every probe, leaving me to only trust her.
It was a small, one story building, red brick clad in ivy crawling up the side of the building, located behind a swirl of iron fencing and half hidden by the phalanx of palmetto trees in front. Audrey led the way in, and as soon as I stepped into the building my nose was assaulted with the sharp sting of medical smells, ether and iodine, floor wax and soft music combining to raise my sudden sense of unease.
"Is your friend a real doctor Audrey?"
"Yes, and I understand she's one of the best. I talked to her on the phone and she has agreed to listen to you so you can explain why you need to become a woman."
I merely nodded my head yes, and followed her into the office of Dr. Laura Betz. Dr. Betz was a short dumpy blonde with short hair, and her brisk manner told me that she was certainly all business. In her office, at Audrey's insistence, I told her about the accident and everything that had happened.
"I have followed this guy around" I told her, "for a long time, and the only way I can see to get to him, other than simply shooting him, is if I become a woman and take away his freedom that way. He would recognize me like I am, and after talking to Audrey, she said that you could help me, and that's why I'm here."
The doctor sat back in her chair and looked at me, saw the grim look etched on my face and somehow knew, maybe by the tone in my voice, that I meant every word I had said. Then she launched into a series of questions that lasted for almost two hours, going all the way back to my childhood, including the times I had dressed as a girl when I was younger, how often I went out, did I date boys, (no), how comfortable I felt and so on. She focused, I noticed, on that portion of my life, making her questions sharper, digging deeper, obviously trying to make sure that I could cope with the changes I needed to have done. I sank into the chair, tired from all of the questions, afraid that the doctor would say no, but also, scared that she might agree to help me.
"Okay Jim, I'll help you, but I have to be frank. Some of the changes are going to be permanent and cannot be reversed. And even then, given the length of time this plasn of yours will probably take, I'm almost certain that it might be hard for you to become a man again. Are you prepared for that?"
"Like what?" I asked, "What would be permanent?"
She carefully outlined the changes that would have to take place for me to be successful in my presentation as a female in every possible way, including more than several months of living as a woman. She told me in plain language, and also in excruciating detail, what would happen if I agreed, again stressing the changes that would not be possible to reverse. In the end, scared at what I had heard, but driven by my mania for justice, and my growing desire for the feminine way of life, I agreed. She asked me to stay, telling Audrey….
"Jim and I will be quite busy for the next week or so Audrey, he and I have a lot of work to do; I'll call and let you know when to come and get him, okay?"
"Sure. Just call and let me know when to pick him up then!" Audrey kissed me, then left the doctor and I alone.
Laura gave me the most complete, and embarrassing physical I had ever had, then left me naked on the table while she drew blood.
"This is a complete clinic, complete with a small operating room and three private rooms. Now I know you're nervous, but I studied in some of the best schools around the country. Columbia, U of M, and in Colorado. Since this takes a while, we might as well start now. You can be gone for a week? Maybe more?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact I can!"
"Good! Now just lay back and relax. I'll call Audrey later and tell her how things are going so she won't worry."
She asked me once again if I were sure about it, and when I nodded my head yes, she gave me a shot that made me numb from the neck down. I saw her reach for a scalpel, then her hand as it lowered to my groin, and I began to have second thoughts, but it was too late for that, as the doctor had sliced into me and made an opening ten centimeters long just above my penis.
While she was operating, she talked, telling me…"I studied under the best doctors in the business Jim, and I have done this many times, so I can guarantee that anyone who isn't a doctor will never be able tell. In fact, I'll even show you some pictures of some of my clients that have made the transition from male to female some time." I knew she was good or my sister would not have brought me here to see her. "Funny thing is" she said pensively, "I can make an average guy look beautiful, and here I am, short and plump, if you're polite, a natural born female, yet everyone of my clients ends up looking better than I do when I'm done!"
Even semi awake I could hear the bitterness creeping into her voice, and hoped she would not let it affect her ability while she worked on me!
"Maybe a little aerobics would help" I ventured.
"I tried that, but everyone is so slim, and they all seem to think they are so much better than I am. Besides, I don't have a partner."
"I'll be your partner Laura. I'll have to go to the classes at least twice a week to get my weight down and maintain it anyway, so why not join me?"
"Maybe I will" she said in an offhand manner.
Eight hours later I was taken to the recovery room and allowed to sleep it off. When I woke, I was sore everywhere, with bandages from my neck to below my waist. Laura came in and checked on me regularly, then, on the fourth day I was there, she at last helped me to my feet. I was wobbly and sore, felt half drunk, and just wanted to lay back down, but she insisted, and wearing one of those thin robes that open up the back, I made my way the bathroom. I was too tired and sore to stand, so I sat and let nature take over, but after reaching for my equipment and not finding it, I remembered that Laura had made the most drastic of changes possible for a male. When the stream hit the bowl, I also knew that she was successful. Once she had me back in my bed, she went over every aspect of feminine hygiene with me, then called Audrey, talked for a moment, then left me alone. The pain started two hours after she had left, but after I took some of the pills she had given me, I was feeling fine in a really numb sort of way.
When Audrey saw me for the first time she was stunned at the changes. My face was swollen and red, even black and blue in a few small spots, I was bent at the waist a bit from the pain of having breast implants and more, yet I know that she saw my eyes glinting in excitement. I got up from the chair, stood up as straight as possible, and faced my sister, letting her absorb the new look.
"It looks like you went ten rounds with a gorilla! I guess Laura did what she said she could do Jimmy, or should I say, Jill?"
"Better make it Jill now Audrey, I don't think Jimmy fits any more!" She laughed and sat at the small table with me. She wanted the details, and I told her what Laura had done for me. "I have to take the hormones, one pill every day, but she said it will reduce my body hair and let me grow my own breasts and have wider hips naturally. Right now I have implants, but she told me that within maybe six months or so she'll take them out. I have a 36-24-36 figure which is exactly what I hoped to have when she was done. The worst was that laser Audrey! It smelled terrible! Like burning hair, but Laura says that I don't have to shave any more!"
She heard the elation and even the twinge of fear in my voice as I spoke about the changes. Audrey and I both knew that taking hormones would change me forever, making me into more of a woman than even she admitted, but she also knew that I was committed, so all she could do was to be there to help me climb the mountain of obstacles I faced. My quest for revenge had taken a turn from which there was no easy way of turning back. Jim her brother was gone. In his place was Jill. Still family, but new, like a bride everyone had to accept, simply because she was now family. There was nothing Audrey could do until I had healed up, so she went home, leaving me to cope with my pain, and continue to get used to my new body.
The next morning brought an urge to use the bathroom, and I managed to make my way there, and by habit I found myself standing in front of the stool as I reached for my equipment, but it was gone! I remembered what had happened of course, it was just a lifetime reflex. I sat down, and once I was done, I stood in the shower until the hot waterpruned my skin. I made a check of my new body, unable to see it of course, but my fingers told me that I surely had a vagina, and that it probably looked like the real thing. I could see my boobs however, and they did look very real! They hung with a slight sag, but they were full, round, and soft, just like a woman's would be, except for the small red scar around the nipple. I hefted one in each hand until the ache of the stitches started to hurt.
In my room I carefully slipped on some panties, then struggled through the pain as I managed to get the soft sports bra that Laura had given me on, then drew on my robe and ambled out of the room and into Laura's office. Having boobs sticking out in front was different, not at all like I remembered from my youth, but then, they had been only nylons filled with rice and I could take them out whenever I wanted to. These were very real, and I would have for a long time. When I walked it must have been like watching a very old person, the dull ache surrounded my pain center like a fog, and unless I took one of the pills I found no relief from the constant throb of pain. I did not like to take pills unless I absolutely had to, so I braved it out, for another twenty minutes.
"I'm going to let you go home Jill, but first I have a suggestion. I have a friend that I work with once in a while, and I would like you to meet him. Today is Monday, why don't I set it up for Friday morning; that will give you some more time to heal up and recover a bit more."
"Okay Laura, thanks, I'll be here."
Audrey arrived a bit later and took me home, making sure I was okay, then left to take care of the kids. I looked like a walking mass of pain and bandages, but Audrey knew that in a few days I would be healed up enough that I would feel a lot better about myself. Somehow, dealing with my new body shape seemed easy, but I knew that it was going to be hard, very hard, to relearn or recapture how to do many things, like react to people as a woman rather than a man. Things like being coy, or shy, reacting to a man that was flirting with me, or even shopping seemed harder to think about than just wearing the clothes or relearning feminine mannerisms. Still, I knew that I had to do it, if only to find some kind of peace with myself. In my room I looked at my reflection again, my face almost regaining it's normal color, the brand new breasts, so firm, yet so tender and soft, pliable and sexy all at once. My hand found the nipple on my right breast, and as I gently touched it, I wondered if I would ever let someone else do the very same thing. My hand, curious like I was, slid down, and found the newness of my shape, my finger tracing the thin shape of the small slit that defined my new sex. I let the finger slide in up to the first knuckle where it stopped, knowing that nothing could go any further; I was not a female, just a man that looked like a woman, a woman with a mission.
Michelle and I married young, at 19, starting a family soon after. Our daughter was born when we were both 21. I had found a job that I liked, and had quickly moved up, gaining raises that allowed us to move into a brand new if smaller yet cozy home. We were a happy family, and I felt nothing but joy when I played with or held my daughter. I had found a reason to succeed, a wife that loved me, and a daughter that needed me; my life had become paradise, until both Michelle and our daughter were killed by a drunk driver, who got nothing more than a fine, which was nothing more than a slap on the wrist for the tragedy he had caused. That's what drove my anger, and what drove to me the extraordinary lengths I was willing to travel to get even, or mete out a more proper justice if you like.
The next morning, as I sat at the kitchen table, I heard Audrey come in. I rarely watched television any more, preferring to listen to the classics, and as the strains of Beethoven's Fifth symphony filled the house, my inner voice told me once again that I was doing the right thing, I only had to completely accept the changes that had taken place. With a sigh, I reached for the panties and pulled them on, then the sports bra, some shorts, a T-shirt, and my tennis shoes. In the kitchen I joined Audrey, poured some coffee and started breakfast.
"So, tell me exactly what has Laura done Jill, she was less than forth coming with me. What changes did she make besides boobs and removing your beard?"
Smiling, I told her. "She used Liposuction to take the fat from my waist, using what she took out to make my hips and butt rounder, plus my thighs just a bit larger, then she used saline implants for breasts. She said they are about a 'A+', but she assured me that by taking the hormones I'll probably be as big as you are now if I don't remove the implants, bigger if I don't. She also managed to create a very realistic vagina without removing my manhood, but don't ask me how, I didn't understand it myself, and I'll tell you, I don't think anyone but a doctor could tell! Then, as you already know, she used a laser to remove my beard down to my collarbone. She said that she wants me to see a friend of hers on Friday. She didn't say why, but if she wants me to, I will."
"Well, you might as well go for it now Jill, it doesn't seem like you can give it up now!"
"I can't Audrey, not now, and I won't. He is going to pay for what he did to me, and I mean pay big!"
When Audrey left, I knew that she had became scared for me all over again, the firm determination in my voice gave no sign of abating, and Audrey still wondered if I could find peace in revenge. Like they said in one of the Star Trek movies, "Revenge is a dish best served cold", but I still carried the heat of my anger like a badge of honor, and all Audrey could only hope for was that the bright light of my anger would not blind me.
I spent the next few days lounging around the house, until at last I went to see Dr. Betz and have my stitches taken out. Laura examined me very carefully before she removed the stitches, and when she was done she told me I was free to do as I wished, as long as I was careful, but that I might want to have one other surgery done.
"That friend I mentioned is here in the office today Jill. He's a specialist, a plastic surgeon. I think that you should have slightly different, more feminine look, and he is just the person to help you. He's in my office if you would like to see him."
With nothing to lose by listening, I agreed and once we had entered her office, I met Dr. Gregory Hassan. He was tall with piercing chocolate brown eyes under a mop of unruly, curly black hair. His chin looked like it was sculptured from marble but his crocked smile was warm and friendly. He wore a tailored gray suit and black shoes, his gold watch hinting from his sleeve as he extended his hand to her.
"Ms. Grant, how nice to meet you." His voice was deep, but had a soft, melodic quality. "May I?" I nodded my head yes, and he took my chin in his hand and felt my nose and cheekbones, then, my throat.
"This man you are after, he has seen you?"
Glancing at Laura, surprised that she had told him what I was going to do, I nodded my head yes. "Of course. Twice in court and once when I accepted the settlement."
"Then he knows you by sight of course. Tell me, in your heart, do you think that becoming a woman will let you do what needs to be done? Without him knowing who you are?" His question confused me, then, as I watched, he put some pictures on the desk. "Can you match them up?"
There were equal numbers of men and women. His test was easy, and I managed to correctly match the men and women as the same person.
"If you can do it, can't your man do it as well?"
"I suppose he can! I never thought of that!"
"I can help you if you like; and, I will even do it for free."
"Why free doctor?" The he told me.
"This man's wife is the daughter of a very well to do man who owns a lot of real estate, most of it on the East Side. My parents had a small store there until this man, the father of the wife, raised the rents so high that my parents had quit their shop. That store is now a video arcade, while my brother and I now support our parents. This man has no remorse, no compassion for people, no sense of neighborhood, only money, which is why the man that killed you family got off so easy. The old man has a lot of financial and political clout. When my friend Laura came to me and told me about you, and how you planned to seek revenge, I had to offer my services and also those of my brother. He is a lawyer by the way. But there is one small suggestion if I may. You have targeted a certain single person, but I might suggest that you look further, to the father in law, and maybe the wife. If they were collectively the target you would satisfy the objectives of many people at one time. A small kidnapping perhaps?"
"His father in law? You want me to go after him too? Why not just the son in law?"
"Of course you could seek retribution from the man that killed you family, but why not my way? If it can be arranged so that using the son in law to get them all, it would be a very tasty treat for many people!"
"But kidnapping is a Federal offense" I said "and they always get the kidnapper!"
"True, but a kidnapping infers a ransom doe sirt not? But of course there won't be one, and that gives all of us time to do what we must before they find us."
"I'm very uncomfortable with this doctor, and I'm not sure I could do that! The guy maybe, but the entire family?"
"Of course" Greg said smiling, "I understand. The mother is also a drunk, and her daughter, the wife of the man that hurt you so badly is taking after her, but tell me, why not include the man who actually pulls the strings? The man that actually orchestrated that minor fine for the tragedy the son in law caused?"
"But" I said, "using her, not hurting her. I won't physically hurt her. We use her to get to her husband, let her give the okay, and in effect ruin her life and her entire family at the same time?"
We all agreed, then he went on to describe the changes he could make to my face. "When I am done you will be beautiful beyond compare Ms. Grant!" I was concerned over his apparent lack of concern for the mother and wife, but after thinking about it, I agreed, and because Laura had recommended him so highly I made the appointment to see him at his office the next day, and left for home.
The doctor was right of course, about how he could make me look, and after he made some minor changes to my face, I was indeed beautiful. After a month to let all the swelling go down, and after I had first let Laura operate on me, I was now an entirely different person, in looks, and in my mind. As the days went by, I became used to the needs of my body and learned how to take care of myself. I also found out why women take so long in the bathroom as well. It was unlike being a male where I could quickly relive myself. Now, I had to almost undress to find relief, and then redo my look so as to not look so disheveled. As I became accustomed to my new body, I also became more aware of the clothes, and how to wear them. Now, it was automatic to put on a bra and clean panties, brush out my hair, and do some makeup in the morning, even before I slipped on some clothes. My sister Audrey had visited every day and seen the changes take place, and even as I became more and more feminine, she grew more and more apprehensive about what I wanted to do, no matter how good my intentions.
"I know that you mean to do this Jill, but hate is a bitter substitute for the love you had for your family, and I'm starting to become afraid for you, very afraid."
"I have to do this Audrey, this same guy just had another accident yesterday! It was in the papers! He hit a school bus of all things! Fortunately it was empty, but it only shows that I have to do this. He needs to learn a lesson, and I want to be the one to give it to him."
Audrey could see for herself that the swelling had gone down, and that I looked strikingly like a popular actress of the fifties in both her body and face. I was driven by the consuming hatred I had for a single man, and no matter what, I told her, I was going ahead with my plan. With a sigh, Audrey told me that since I was her sister, her family, she could not let me do this alone, and she offered to help me with the clothes, makeup and hair.
"You've been at this for over two months, almost three now, and even though you look like a woman, you'll need someone to help you go the rest of the way Jill, and it has to be me! I insist"
"Okay sis, I'm yours."
Up to that point all I had worn were the basic clothes like a bra and panties, shorts or a simple dress. Audrey told me that I should at least buy some panties of my own.
"You can afford it Jill, so let me help you get dressed and we can go shopping for a few things."
I nodded my head yes and we went to my bedroom. I ended up wearing just lipstick and a bit of eye shadow. Audrey made it clear that she thought that if I wanted to recapture my ability to look like a girl, she wanted me to start wearing nothing but skirts rather than shorts or slacks, so I slipped on the short black skirt, zipping it up and took the blouse that Audrey had in her hand.
"Sit here" she said as I finished buttoning up the blouse.
With a curling iron and some hairspray she created a modestly feminine hairdo for me. "It's not perfect, but it's better than anything you've managed so far, and will do for now. Get your shoes and a purse."
Once I was ready, Audrey drove us to the mall, and on the way over, Audrey told me take shorter steps.
"Walk beside me and take a step when I do, remember? That way you'll see how long your step has to be; and hold your elbows closer to your body with your arms bent outward, or to the front." I nodded my head in understanding, and nervously made my first real appearance as a female in public in a very long time. What I noticed right away was the way some of the men looked at me.
"You'll get used to it Jill, we all do. Men are so visual that they always look at women that way." I knew that I looked like a woman, but my inbred fear of discovery, still with me, kept rising into my throat, but almost everything came back to me in a rush, and I found myself using mannerisms I had thought long forgotten. Audrey knew I was afraid, but also knew that I would once again have to conquer that fear on my own and said nothing. "Let's go in here Jill", and I was steered into the salon. Once inside, I smelled the scent of many different solutions, most of them known only to the operators, and crinkled my nose. Debbie was free, and once I was settled into the chair, Audrey left. "This your first time?" Debbie asked and I wondered if she knew about me, but of course, that was impossible. Debbie meant my first time in that salon.
"Yes, and I don't have a clue what I want done."
"Let me make a few suggestions" Debbie offered, and I agreed with every one of them.
Debbie went to work on me, and I sat through it, not sure how I would look, only trusting that Debbie knew what she was doing. My hair was washed, clipped, snipped, rolled, and some foul smelling solutions were used. Once that was done and I was under a dryer, another girl came over and started on my nails. While my fingers were not as slim as most women's, and my nails more square, like a man's, the girl doing my nails said nothing as she filed and trimmed them before she added acrylic extensions. Once she and I were happy with the length, she painted them a soft reddish pink and added two coats of hardener plus a top coat. With my nails still wet, Debbie began to take the rollers out and brush out my hair, making a very nice career style pageboy. My hair hung in curls down the back, curling around my ears in gentle waves of soft brown tinted with auburn highlights, my bangs were down to my eyebrows and swept to one side. As I looked in the mirror I saw not the shaggy mouse brown hair I started with, but a wonderfully styled feminine hairdo with the glint of red in my hair. My green eyes smiled at the reflection, because for the first time I thought I had a more than even chance of success.
When Audrey returned she expected to see some changes, but having my hair done did more than give me confidence, I thought I was stunning, and by the smile on my face, I knew that my sister thought so too. It was then that the small changes to my face that Dr. Hassan had made became clearer. The small cleft in my chin was gone, and my nose was smaller, a cute button that sat between my now higher cheekbones. I looked like a young Maureen O'Hare, including the red tint in my hair! Audrey's brother, once just an average looking guy, had become a beautiful woman, and all I had left to do was learn everything about how to be the woman I looked like. From there we went shopping, buying panties, three new bras, some pantyhose, and because Michelle was a flannel kind of girl and I wasn't, some more diaphanous nightgowns. Then I had my makeup done by a professional, buying some of everything the woman had used. Audrey dropped me off at home and returned to her family, leaving me to try on clothes that would now, not only fit me, but also accent my newly created beauty.
Michelle had been a beautiful woman, but her taste in clothes had not been towards the sexy side, which had never bothered me before, but now, as a woman myself, I needed something to make a definite impression on someone. As I looked in the closet, I found only two that might work, and I tried them both on. One was an angora sweater that just came to my waist, and was tight enough to accent my boobs perfectly when I had it on. With a short skirt, it would work fine. The other was a red party dress. It was a sheath style dress with spaghetti straps, a short hemline, and a slit up the side. I tried them both on and came to understand why Michelle wore the red dress so rarely! It hung from my shoulders, the thin straps holding up the front which settled half way down on my breasts, showing a lot of cleavage, enough to make me feel very cheap all of a sudden. The hem hit me at mid thigh while the slit went almost to my butt. It was a sexy dress and fit me perfectly, but somehow, for an afternoon encounter, I knew it was wrong, so I put on the angora top and a short black mini skirt instead. My shoes, black patent leather with spike heels hiked me up in the air and made my legs shapely while pushing out my bottom at the same time. I changed my lipstick to a deep red, added some perfume, and left for the short drive to Nino's Bar and Grill.
I parked the car and walked towards the door, afraid, and compelled all at once. Opening the door I walked into the darkened bar, the dim light shedding an eerie glow on the few patrons, all men, who were already there. As I walked to the bar and hoisted myself up and onto a stool, I could actually feel every eye in the place on me. A palpable sense of lechery invaded the room, making me feel more than a bit uneasy, but I crossed my legs and sat there anyway, swallowing my concern. Once my drink was in front of me, I looked in the mirror behind the bar. Shiny eyes looked back at me out of the gloom with smiles from the men, eyes that certainly invited me to join them. No words were spoken, but I knew, all women know, and I was suddenly getting used to it. Shuddering at the thought of their thoughts, I sipped my drink. Twenty minutes later my target came in for his afternoon drink. I watched him in the mirror as he walked behind me, then to a stool down the bar a bit. He flashed his best smile at me, and I smiled back while at the same time, letting my skirt rise up a little more. He was watching me as I ignored him with my eyes, all the while tempting him with my body, my very short sweater that almost revealed my tummy, and legs that seemed to go on forever were an almost irresistible invitation.
Sliding down the bar…"Hi there! My name is Jeff Benson, what's yours?"
I looked at him before I spoke. He was handsome, and I could see in his eyes the hope of conquest. "Hi yourself. My name is Jill."
"We don't see many women like you in here Jill, what brings you here today?"
"What kind of woman do you think I am Jeff?" My question threw him off a bit, but he recovered nicely when he told me that he meant beautiful. "I was in the area and got thirsty, that's all." He made an effort to get me to sit in a booth with him, but I told him I had to leave. "Maybe I'll see you again Jeff, but right now I have an appointment. Bye now!" I left, making sure that with every step I took my hips were swaying, all the way to the door. Once I was in the bright daylight, I quickly got into my car and went home, feeling like I needed a shower.
Collecting the mail, I saw a letter from Benjamin L. Hassan, attorney at law. Tearing open the letter, I quickly read it. It was an invitation for me to meet with him at my earliest convenience, so that he might help me in any way possible. Smiling, I called his office and made an appointment for the next morning at ten. Then I changed into some jeans, started up the CD player, and as Midnight Serenade started to play, I went to the kitchen to make some dinner.
The next morning I got ready for my appointment, selecting a suit from Michelle's, or rather, my, wardrobe. I took a shower, patting myself with powder when I was done, then sat at the vanity and did my makeup. This time, I managed to do it perfectly, my skills driven more by desire, but enhanced with practice. My foundation was light, since I no longer had a beard to cover, my eye shadow muted in colors of light green and gray. The eyeliner was a deep black, a trace both above and under each eye, my mascara just enough to give them body but not look cheap. On my cheeks I used a soft coral blusher, blending it with a small sponge. Then I went to my dresser and retrieved panties which I slipped on, then my peach bra, which was thin, and let my nipples poke out against the material. I liked the look, so I fastened the front hook and fluffed my boobs so that they were held tightly, yet it looked as if they filled the cups to over flowing. Pantyhose, then the blouse, an off white silk, it had a lace insert in front that showed just a hint of my cleavage. I buttoned the high rise collar, and stepped into the pink skirt. It was cut straight and fell just above my knees. The jacket, when it was buttoned accented my now narrow waist, the gold and white pin on the jacket drawing ones eye to my breasts. Smiling, I slipped my feet into the white heels and put the gold and white earrings on, then a gold watch on my left wrist and a gold bracelet on my right. Obsession perfume, a gift to Michelle from before the accident sat on the vanity, and I took it in my hand and put some on my neck, elbows and wrists. Pink lipstick that complemented my look was added, and I changed my things to a white purse.
I was escorted into his office, and immediately knew that he was a very successful man. The rich wood paneling and deep maroon leather chairs gave way to the many bright flowers scattered around the office. Benjamin Hassan was older than his brother by at least ten years, but like his brother, he was also tall, a robust looking man with a short fringe of gray hair and deep black eyes that seemed to smile for him. He shared the same olive colored skin and enchanting smile of his brother.
"Ms. Grant! How nice to meet you at last. Allow me to introduce my parents."
He motioned across the room, and I saw them. The man stood up, slightly bent with age, but proud, still looking strong. He had a full head of hair that was all white, a moustache that was going white, and the same smile that his sons shared. He gave a small bow with his head, and rested his hand on his wife's shoulder. She wore the traditional dress of the Middle East, and her eyes, like her sons, seemed to dance in the light. I saw the careworn wrinkles around their eyes, the gnarled hands of his father and the gentle smile of his mother.
"I know it seems like a cheap way to approach this, but Greg said that maybe you should meet our parents." He walked over to his parents and stood beside them. "This is my father, Ibriham Hassan, and my mother, Petra."
The old man slowly walked up to me, looking me over closely. "In my country of birth" he said, his voice croaking, This thing you have done could not happen, but I see no sign that you are a man, and I begin to wonder if Ben has pulled a trick on us."
Having gone to school with students from countries like this man's, I understood. "Thank you; but I am a male, at least I was once. For now, your son Gregory has helped me become a woman so that I might right a terrible wrong."
He nodded his head, and took my hand in his. My hand seemed to disappear in his, and as he held it, his wife took the other. "Do not" she said softly, "let anger control you child. Do what has to be done and then quit. Be yourself and go on with life." Her soft words and gentle touch said a lot about her and her family, and I understood why her sons were so compassionate.
"We have no daughter" Ibriham said, "and we know about your trying to right a terrible wrong, so with your permission, we adopt you as our own. If you ever need help, come to me and I will be there with whatever we have." The man's voice cracked and I saw a small tear forming in his eye. I reached out and hugged them each, wiping away the small tear on his cheek, kissing them both on the cheek.
Ben let them out, then turned his attention to me. "My mother has already adopted you, and my father, well, he accepts you more than he will admit."
"I think they are wonderful people!"
He nodded his head in thanks, and got right down to business. "I have run checks on this family, and have a very detailed packet of information on them. The man that killed your family, Jeff Benson, was raised by his grandmother in a nice area, but they had very little money. He has a high school education and not much else. The feeling is that he married his wife in more of an effort to improve his financial status rather than his love life. He is focused on one thing and cares little for, or about others. His wife, Marianne, was raised in an affluent neighborhood and never went without anything in her entire life. She was thrown out of three colleges for poor grades due to her constant partying. Her father is a prominent businessman who's only joy in life is money. He has a single goal, making money, and he uses people as pawns to gather as much money and political clout as he can, and the methods he uses, while questionable, are always legal. The old man also thinks in the manner of the old south; women are to be ornaments or vessels for birth and nothing more. He follows the law on equal treatment of course, but the highest ranking female in his entire organization is only a supervisor in the accounting department, and she has an MBA from a big ten university.
I've given your plan some thought, and the way I see it, you are going about this the wrong way. Sure, you took him to the cleaners after the accident and never have to work again if you don't want to, but the way to break the entire clan is to break the cycle. If his daughter had been a son, the right of succession would be complete, but he now has to rely on his son in law for that, and I don't think he trusts the kid. He's got him working for the woman supervisor, and that would not happen if he trusted the kid all of the way, so, while targeting the son in law might be the right thing to do, just embarrassing him probably won't work. The old man has enough money to quash most things, and won't risk exposure by some broad with just a few nasty pictures. He'll fall on you like a ton of bricks and you'll be crushed and forgotten." The air was filling with tension as I listened to him, wondering where he was going with this. "You are an alluring woman Jill Grant, I wonder how his son in law would look?" Then it all came clear, and in a flash I understood.
"Make Jeff into a woman!?"
He nodded his head yes, then added, "But not with all of the advantages you have had. I'm thinking big boobs, really big, a butt that is sexy, and hair piled up high and done in platinum blonde. A hooker if you like, definitely not a male at first glance, but not with the surgery you have had. Leave him with all of his equipment intact, and let me have him. I'm sure that my father and some of his friends can finish the job and make him into something both he and the old man will hate. Not just a woman, but a very easy male woman." I immediately got a mental image, and began to giggle.
Then, he handed me some documents to sign. "These will legally change your name to Jillian Michelle. I talked to your sister and she is the one that suggested the name." I read the papers, and was thankful for Audrey's insight. Using Michelle's name would keep her close to me, and I quickly signed them all. "In a few days you will get a paper from the court that you can use to get a new drivers license and so on. Do that before you do anything else, and if you have any trouble refer them to me. Okay?"
"Okay!" I said eagerly.
That afternoon I joined an aerobics class and then called Laura.
"I have enrolled you in an aerobics class with me, and our first class is at six tomorrow morning. I'll look forward to seeing you again Laura." I gave her no chance to say no, or even find a reason to say no, I simply hung up the phone. Then I went shopping for an exercise outfit.
Early the next morning, clad in shorts over my outfit, I drove to class, and joined Laura, who was already there. Laura wore sweats, gray and shapeless, while I wore a dark gray leotard under an emerald green body suit. We both wore white shoes. The instructor was, as expected, slim and trim, with a name like Amber, or Heather or Ashley. I didn't care, and Laura was too consumed with the way she looked to bother to listen. We spent a good portion of the morning there, learning the exercises, stretching and so on. Laura and I worked together, offering encouragement to each other when we were tired, and felt worn out. It took us a month of constant exercise, but I almost made my goal weight, while Laura had lost almost thirty pounds! I now weighed 118 pounds, which as a man, I would have looked skinny, but as a woman, I looked positively wonderful. Laura now weighed in at 130, and her entire outlook on life had changed. As soon as she reached that point, she went out and bought an outfit just like mine, only in red. I had taken the next step towards letting the darkness lead me and I could have my revenge.
As the days wore on, I began to become comfortable with the many new mannerisms I had to learn and now, they came almost naturally to me. In trying on Michelle's clothes, I found clothes that I liked, and some I did not. Those I did not like, or were to small, I donated to a charity, and replaced them with clothes I had bought. The image that I wanted to convey, and was most comfortable with, was of a woman that was intellectual, yet sexy. I liked to dress conservatively, except that underneath, I always wore lingerie that was lacy and very feminine. Yet somehow, I always managed to let glimpses of that very same lingerie show through once in a while. My persona was that of a busy woman, industrious, smart and self assured, maybe even a wooman that was yearning for the right man. One might think that I was a teacher or dress shop owner reading romance novels while I imagined that I was waiting for the right man to cart me away and make love to me endlessly.
But I was far from being a gullible young girl, and I had no ambition regarding men. I was a woman with a mission. On Sunday, I drove to the cemetery to visit the graves, but this time I stood there in a black dress, my heels sinking into the moist ground as I spoke to them. A robin, maybe the same one, once again sat on a headstone and watched me, a curious bent of its head telling me that I seemed somehow familiar, yet different.
"I'll be back when I am done, and this is over" I told them, "then you can finally rest in peace." As I walked away I heard the raucous sounds of the birds, almost like laughter in the background as I walked to the car.
Ben called me to set up a meeting with myself and all of my collaborators in this event. That afternoon I went into his office, and found Laura, Greg, Audrey, his parents, and a stranger. The only open chair was next to Greg, and he stood for me as I sat, a wide smile on his face, something the others did not miss. Once we were all seated, Ben stood up and spoke to the group.
"We all know why we are here, each of us for our various reasons and objectives. Jill here wants to put a man in a situation he has no recourse from. My parents want the man's father in law put out of business, maybe even ruined socially and financially. Audrey, because of her love for Jill has agreed to help as well, but her primary motivation is Jill's safety. My brother Greg has contributed his enormous skills to helping Jill achieve the look she wanted, but myself, I think he is also in love…finally" At this, I looked at Greg and saw a slow silly grin highlighted by a blush on his face. Shaken, I turned back to Ben. "My friends, let me introduce you to Ian O'Keefe. He is the preeminent private detective in the business. Mr. O'Keefe."
"This is not the most dangerous thing I ever heard of, but I want to hear the entire plan directly from you Jill. Tell me all about it in your own words."
I stood up, joining Ben at his desk. "I plan to try and get close to his wife, Marianne, become best friends and so on. Her husband, if he is true to form will hit on me and I will let him think he will succeed. At my home, I will drug him, and Laura will start her magic on him. In a single weekend, Laura and I, working together, will change him from a robust male to a sniveling female that will seem not a whole lot brighter than he will look. Then, after he is dressed correctly, we will release him in front of a whorehouse I know of."
"Not bad" Mr. O'Keefe said, "but it does not address the needs of everyone here. Let's talk about it."
O'Keefe lit up a cigar that smelled like he was smoking a dead rat, and after a few coughs, Ben opened a window. "Sorry about that folks, it helps me to think. Okay. First, there's no denying the fact that you are winsome lass, and would have no trouble fitting in with Marianne's crowd, and convincing her husband to hit on you doesn't seem like to big a stretch, but turning him into something that looks like a hooker probably wouldn't even register on the old man at all. No, we need to find a way to link the two of them, the kid and the old man, then make it public. Very public."
"Sir?" The shaky voice of the elder Mr. Hassan broke the silence. "I have a friend, more an acquaintance, but he has connections in some very low places. In my country we have Harems, outlawed now, but still around; not all of them are filled with women. Some are filled with men that look like women. Some of the very wealthy go there. Some think that a boy once in a while makes them more virile. This boy, can we do that to him?"
Before he could answer, Audrey shocked me with a suggestion of her own. "If we get that far, maybe we can maneuver the father in law into meeting the kid in some sexual way. That way we would have them both!"
"That is an excellent idea Audrey! Mr. Hassan, if you would, contact your friend and ask him if we can depend on his help?" Mr. O'Keefe sounded positively overjoyed!
"I met the father in laws wife a few times at charity events" said Ben, "She's a bit of a lush, and a charity dilettante. Her old man keeps her on a short leash, but I'll bet I can get her to help me get close to the old man, then I can suggest a trip to a place where they have more...exotic forms of pleasures. I'll bet he goes for it."
"That my boy, is an excellent idea! Ben will take care of the old man while Jill gets the son in law. Mr. Hassan, here's my card. If you can arrange it, I would like to meet this friend of yours."
The meeting broke up, and I could tell that Audrey was half expecting to talk to me, but when she turned around she saw that Gregory Hassan was talking to me, a smile came to her face. She knew that being a woman had its benefits, and Gregory Hassan was certainly one of them.
"Please, let me take you to dinner. A beautiful woman like you should never dine alone!"
It would be my first date if you wanted to call it that, and liking the tall doctor, I nodded my head yes. As I stood up, he took my hand in his and we walked out of the office together. Audrey and the others watched us leave, smiles traced on the faces of the others. His father merely stood there, but I saw Petra smiling at me.
I went home, thoughts of my first date hard on my mind, wondering why I felt the way I did. After living as a woman for the last five months, I was just getting comfortable in my new role, and Gregory Hassan had added to my mental confusion by merely being my friend. No matter how hard I tried, I could not think of one reason to be celibate, or not go out with the tall dark man that was so attracted to me. I was concerned of course, never having dated as a woman before, but going to dinner seemed so innocent that I put my concerns aside. He said he would be over at seven, and after a quick peek at the clock, I saw that I had a few hours to get ready, and I spent it wisely. As I sank into the warm water and let the bubbles rise to my neck, I relaxed and decided to let nature take its course, but for some reason, the image of Greg Hassan stayed in my mind. When I had dried off, I powdered myself all over, and went to my dresser.
For this, my first date, I wanted to be confidently feminine as I could be, and I grabbed the thin green panties and slipped them on. The high cut legs let my hip show more than usual, which brought a smile to my face. Barely visible, the cleft of my sex reminded me again that I was now a woman as I reached for the bra. It was also green, the thin lacy cups had built in push up pads, and when I fastened the front hook my breasts rose and filled out the bra, threatening to over flow, which is exactly what I needed to calm my uneasy nerves. In the past I had wondered about dating as a girl, but had never actually done it. And later, being married, I was convinced that I was a normal guy; until I started living in a girls body that is. As a woman there was no shame in dating a man, it was all that other stuff that concerned me.
At the vanity I brushed out my hair, adding two gold barrettes, one on each side, which let my hair hang down the back and left my face and ears open. My makeup was understated yet enhanced my face perfectly; the black eyeliner outlined my almond shaped eyes while the soft gray and rose eye shadow made my green eyes a sparkle. The dress was a new one that I had bought a few days ago simply because I liked it; now I hoped Gregory would too. I slipped it over my head, letting it settle before I zipped it up. The straps fastened behind my neck, making the emerald green dress sleeveless, with a huge slash down the front that exposed my cleavage in a way I had always admired on certain women. Now I was that woman, and as I stepped into the black heels and bent over to do up the straps, I saw myself in the mirror, my breasts hanging like rich globes of passion fruit. I added perfume, then gold button earrings and my bracelet, and finally, the reddish brown lipstick. My wallet went into the small black clutch bag just as the doorbell rang.
He was charming and erudite, funny and extremely handsome. That was a term I had never used about a man until I became a woman, but I had begun to see the effect I had on men in general, and Greg in particular. I had never had a thought about another man in any way except in friendship up to that point, but as he talked, I warmed up to him and relaxed. My once tenor voice, now a contralto because of his expertise, made me sound very sexy, and it just seemed as if the tone of my voice made his heart beat faster. When the music started he swept me into his arms, and during a slow number, with my arms around his neck because there wasn't anyplace else to put them, he bent down and kissed me! Gently at first, then, his tongue tasted my lips and I groaned in confusion. Later, he took me home, holding me in his arms on my doorstep, my face upturned to him as he bent to kiss me again. His lips touched mine, and my firestorms of internal protests gave way to the kaleidoscope of a newly discovered yet very feminine urgent need. It was the first time another human being had paid this much intimate attention to me since the accident, and I was surprised how much I hungered for that attention. All thoughts of being a man escaped my mind as he held me in his arms, kissing me, and making my knees weak. I opened the door, my eyes pleading for more of his attention, and was prepared to let him come in, but he would not.
"Not yet Jill, but soon, very soon. Goodnight." I stood in the doorway and watched as he drove away in his sports car, the throaty roar of the exhaust loud in the night.
In my bedroom I undressed and slipped into a baby doll nightgown, the blue one I liked, and crawled into bed wondering why I had felt the way I did. Right up until that night, if someone had asked me, I would have said I was positively a heterosexual male. Now, after almost five months as a woman, I wasn't so sure. Greg had ignited a fire in me that burned my confusion even deeper. He made me feel sexy and wanted, ladylike, not like a cheap whore. His hands had massaged my back as we danced, strong yet gentle, his aftershave cloying, my nose telling me it was expensive. I had felt so natural letting him take charge, and after a lifetime of being the one in charge, I found it refreshing and it also made me feel very feminine. My hand wandered to my sex, and I wondered if he knew it was fake, but then, of course he knew. His hand, when it touched my breast, was warm and made me tingle all over, something that had never happened before, and more, I liked it! Smiling, I fell asleep, dreams of his crooked smile in my mind all night.
The next morning, after aerobics class, I dressed for the occasion, wearing a low cut sundress and strappy sandals for my first encounter with the airhead Marianne, and her mother. She and her mother were going to be at a charity garden party at ten, and I made sure I had my makeup and hair perfect for the day. On the way over I picked up my new drivers license, Social Security card, new checks, and passport. Then I drove to the huge garden party. Marianne was easy to spot, because, like her mother, she had a drink in her hand, even at this early hour in the day.
Marianne was skinny, almost anorexic, with tiny boobs and almost no butt, and her dress hung from her like she was no more than a hanger. Her hat shaded her eyes from the sun, but it couldn't hide the baggy eyes which told the real story. Marianne was well on her was to becoming a lush, just like her mother. I worked my way closer to her and struck up a conversation.
"You're Marianne Benson! I saw your picture in the paper not to long ago! My name is Jill Grant." Marianne smiled and put her hand out to take mine.
"Thanks Jill. Are you new here? I don't think I've seen you around before now."
"Yes, after daddy died I sold everything and moved down here. I like Savannah so much better, don't you?"
Instantly Marianne warmed up to me because it was obvious to her that I had money, and breeding as her daddy called it. The host of the garden party urged everyone to contribute, and as Marianne rummaged in her purse, I calmly wrote a check for $1000. Marianne saw the amount, and was convinced that I was of her class.
"Listen Jill, I'm having a small get together on Friday night, why don't you join us?" This was going a whole lot better than I ever thought possible and accepted on the spot. "Just ask for the Benson Mansion; everybody knows where it is." "Thank you Marianne, I'll be there."
That afternoon I drove to Audrey's house so that the kids could meet Aunt Jill for the first time. They were young enough to accept me for what I seemed to be, and little Sara climbed into my lap and promptly went to sleep. Audrey put the kids down for their nap, and joined me on the patio.
"How did the date go?" It sounded like such an innocent question, but I knew that Audrey wanted the details, all of the details!
"We had a nice dinner, we danced, and he took me home. It was very pleasant."
"Jill!"
A smile, unbidden, came to my face and I started to giggle. "I never thought that I would go out with a man Audrey, never! But Greg has a way about him that is so hard to say no to!" Then, in a more serious tone, I added, "I kissed him Audrey, and I liked it! It was like a jolt of electricity went through me and I couldn't stop."
"You have become a woman Jill. After all this time, your mind has accepted that the way you look is the way you should have always been. When I saw you for the first time after Laura was done, I knew right then that Jimmy wasn't coming back. Jill, you started this with an admirable motive, but now, while the motive might still be there, you have changed in more ways than you can realize. I see it, and Greg sees it. You have become not merely a man that looks like a woman, but inside, in your heart, you have become the woman you always have been. Greg likes you, he's handsome, and you make a cute couple, so don't fight it Jill." Then she added, "I don't think you can anyway. After this is over, follow your heart and do what you have to do to find happiness. If that includes Greg, so be it. Just be the best wife you can be." I did not expect her to say that, and I was confused, but knew that Audrey was right.
At that same moment Ian O'Keefe was sitting in a magnificent wing back chair, across a huge, beautiful rug, facing a man with no name. "My name is not important Mr. O'Keefe, let it suffice to say that I am in a position to help you."
The man that spoke wore a thin gray robe that swirled around him as he walked, his headpiece sparkling white, his eyes dark and gray like the sharks in the ocean, yet sharp and keen. He had a thin narrow chin covered in well trimmed hair that was going gray. The image was deceptive. The man spoke with an English accent and his use of the language belied his education.
"Ibriham has never once asked for help from me, or anyone I represent, yet he has always been there when someone needed a bag of groceries, a coat, maybe some advice, or even a doctor. He and Petra have raised to two fine sons and they have also taken the honor to watch over our small community. They have raised their sons well without any help. Now, after all these years, he comes to me for help, and not for himself, but for another, and she is not even of our country! My heart swells with pride for Ibriham, so how could I possibly say no? Tell me how I can help you."
Ian O'Keefe wasn't the least bit intimidated by the man, because he understood the custom of family this man represented. In his culture a tribe was a single unit and they all worked to support each other in times of need. No questions asked, simply a need, then, some help. O'Keefe knew that the man understood what was going on, because he knew that Ibriham had told him the entire story. This man with no name only wanted to hear it from him. He launched into a detailed description of the events and how they led him to this spot.
"I will help you of course Mr. O'Keefe. A thing like this in my country is dealt with swiftly, while here, a man with money can do much to avoid his responsibilities. Tell Ibriham when, and I shall do as you ask."
Ian put out his hand, and the man took it, his grip firm and manly, not crushing as if he had a point to prove. These men understood each other, and more, how to deliver justice to those that needed it most.
Ian knew that Jeff Benson was going to wish he had never been born. The man with no name had not said so, but Ian sensed that the house to which the boy would be taken was close by, but he did not want to know. It was better that way. Jill was the bait, Marianne was going to be the hook, and the man with no name was going to gut the boy and send him back to the sea. It was, he instinctively knew, not something to be close to.
Marianne opened the door to the mansion, greeting Greg and I like old friends. Her husband Jeff was circulating among the guests, telling a joke or giving a greeting. When he came to Greg and I, he gave no sign of recognition, and I relaxed even more. Greg had his arm firmly linked in mine, and led me away from Jeff.
"I'm going to disappear Jill, it's your show now."
I watched as he slipped into the crowd, then managed to work my way close to Jeff. Using my best damsel in distress look, I got his attention, and began to flirt with him. It was common knowledge that his ego was so large that he felt he could get any woman into his bed with merely a look and a smile, and having baited him once at the bar, I looked like I was fair game. With Greg's help I was certainly pretty, and Jeff responded to me just like I had predicted.
For the event I had worn the red dress, but I also wore a corselet that hiked my boobs up so high I could almost rest my chin on them. Petra had altered the hem, so that it fell well above mid thigh on me, and between the two, Jeff had his eyes riveted on my bulging assets, my smile completely missed. He took my arm, and walked me out on the huge patio where his hand found my firm but very feminine bottom. I did not move as he caressed me, until his hand wandered up my side to my breasts.
"Not here silly! This is too public, and your wife is right over there!"
He turned and saw Marianne talking to Greg, and smiled. "She's trying to get your boyfriend into her bed right now so don't worry about her." His voice had a slightly drunken tint to it, foggy, but still in control. I was a bit surprised, but he did not recognize me at all!
"Well, okay" I said, "but not here. At my house. Drive me home."
His vanity refused to let him doubt me, and he strutted out to his car, telling Marianne that he would be gone for awhile, but she was so taken by the tall doctor that she merely waved her hand at him. Her conquest was right in front of her, while he was off chasing me, hoping that I would do whatever he wanted so she wouldn't have to. I sat in my car shaking, scared out of my wits at what I was about to do, but I had no choice really, the die had been cast, and I was now merely a pawn in this game I had started.
I waited at the front door for him, my hip thrust out, showing more leg than at the party, my boobs hiked up while my smile invited him inside. I took a step inside and turned to face him, my arms out to greet him, and as we figured, he rushed in, ready to tear my clothes off and take me, but in his frenzy of vanity and lust he never felt the needle slide into his backside. He almost made it to me when he dropped to the floor. Heavy, like wet cement, Laura and I moved him to a chair and made a single phone call. Moments later, two strong men I had never seen before took him to a small panel van and drove him to the clinic where Laura took over. The nightmare was about to begin.
Naked, but unable to move, he was dazed as the laser fired, going on for hours until, at last he was given another shot that continued to make him numb all over. Still on the table, I stood over him, my red dress now gone, replaced by jeans and a top.
"Recognize me asshole?" He tried to talk, but his tongue refused to obey the commands of his mind. "Remember Michelle and Beth Grant? You killed them, remember? Do you remember the screech of torn metal, spurting blood and crushed bodies? Or the laugh you gave my family when you walked out of court a free man? With nothing more than a fine?" Not being able to move, he became scared of me, his terror clearly marked in his eyes and the gurgling noises he was making told me he remembered. "I know I don't look it, but my real name is Jim Grant. It was my family that you killed. It was my entire family that you stole away from me, and now I intend to have my justice." I relaxed and smiled at him. "Since I do not want to kill you, and that's not enough punishment for someone like you anyway, I am going to make you remember what you did to my family every day for the rest of your miserable life. I can't tell you how just yet, that would ruin the surprise, and we all know how you like surprises." Mercifully, Laura gave him another shot, and he went out like a light.
He awoke tied to the bed, but as he tried to free himself the pain returned and he lay back down, exhausted after just a few tries to break his bindings. Laura and I went in, but this time we each wore a head covering and he could not see our faces.
"Time to get up now honey. Be a good girl and this will go easy. Fight us and you'll find needle in your arm and we'll dress you anyway!"
Laura spoke in harsh, deep tones, and scared him with the needle in her right hand. I threw some clothes on the bed and told him to get dressed, and if he needed help we would help him. Just to cover his nakedness he quickly slipped the panties on, covering his now very limp appendage.
"Now the bra asshole!"
His hand reached for it and brushed up against two huge and very full boobs! His shriek filled the room, but Laura and I simply waited until he quit screaming, then told him to put the bra on. We watched as he struggled with the unfamiliar garment until he got it on, then I reached in and pulled his sore and very tender breasts up until they seemed to fall out of the bra.
"Now the pantyhose" I said.
He managed with that okay, then we slipped a dress over his head and zipped it up, pulling the thin pink latex dress tightly around him. It had a low back and a plunging front, and the hem was barely past his groin. His wares stood out, and were, without a doubt, real. The shoes were also pink, with a four inch heel, and as he stepped into them he began to teeter and fall, but he recovered and stood very still.
I took his face in my hands and applied some bright red lipstick and squirted him with a cheap perfume.
"Those are real tits you have there honey, but it would be a shame to waste them on someone like you, so we are taking a trip where you will learn to be all you need to know to survive."
"Why???!!" he screamed, the terror in his voice evident.
"If you don't know by now you never will, so I won't go into that right now. Later, you will understand."
We put a platinum blonde wig on his head, blindfolded and handcuffed him just before he was marched out of the clinic and into the waiting van. I watched as the men drove him away, my nightmare almost over, while his was just beginning.
He was hustled into the building and made to stand in the middle of the room, the aroma of hashish and garlic lingering in the air, and he became more afraid than ever before. He felt a gentle hand on his shoulder and started to relax, then another hand reached under his dress and grabbed his manhood and squeezed. The pain was intense but no sound came out as his mind had passed that ability to his pain centers.
"You are mine now" said a voice. It was deep, clearly male, and close by. "You are to be my newest concubine and service many men before you will win your release."
Jeff knew what a concubine was of course, a whore! He tried to move, but his ankles had been bound and he could only stand there or risk falling over. He was still blindfolded, and the handcuffs held his arms behind him. He squirmed against his restraints until finally, he knew he could not get free.
"Your name is now Flower, and you will respond to that name whenever it is called; any failure to do so will result in severe punishment. If you fail to service a client you will be whipped until you pass out, and even then the punishment is 30 strokes, awake or not."
Without another word, Flower was taken to a small room and her restraints taken off. She looked around the room and saw a small stained mirror on one wall, and looked into it. He wanted to cry when he saw his reflection. He now had boobs that had to be at least a full DD cup, his hair, while only a wig, was piled on his head in a hooker style that he found revolting at the very best. The thin latex dress hugged his every curve, and as he ran his hand over his face and arms, he felt no stubble at all. His skin was as smooth as a babies butt, or rather, a woman's skin. Still teetering in the heels, he opened the only door and found a closet filled with nothing but the sheerest, shortest, sexiest clothes he could imagine. He flopped on the bed and started crying again, unsure if anyone could ever find and rescue him.
Marianne didn't miss her husband for two days, as she was still under the effects of the mild sedative that Greg had given her. Now, she wondered just what had happened. On her dresser were some flowers and a note. It was from the tall doctor.
"Thank you for the wonderful time. Love," it was unsigned, but she knew who had sent it. Unfortunately, she did not remember a thing. She hoped she had been good in bed, but she herself did not remember.
I had gone home and taken a long hot shower, trying to wash away the stink of conspiracy. The man I had condemned to a fate far worse than death truly deserved it, and I wondered if he would ever really understand why he was being treated that way. Naked, I sat at the kitchen table, my breasts lying against the cold, hard, wood as I looked across the patio and out on the lake. Twenty minutes later I put on a skirt and blouse and called Greg. He arrived a few minutes later, finding me confused and afraid.
"It is all over now Jill. He will be trained in the arts, in the way of women, and he will eventually find happiness. It's not the way of our court system, but justice comes in many flavors, some sweet, some bitter, some are even meaningless, but this man is meeting his justice now, and not only does he deserve it, you know in your heart it is the right thing to do."
I was in tears, for what I had done, as well as for Jeff, and fell into Greg's arms and sobbed. He held me until I stopped crying, wiped away my tears and then kissed me. It was gentle, like a wisp of wind, yet electric, like a jolt of high voltage. We looked into each other's eyes for a moment, then I knew what I had to do, wanted to do. I took him by the hand and led him to my bedroom. What would have been an automatic denial before was lost now. Any uneasiness I might have felt at what I was about to do was gone. Living as a woman for so long had given me a completely feminine view of myself and life, and I understood the attraction of a strong, masculine man as only a woman can. I had a longing for him that went way past any doubts I had before. I was going to submit, no, actually I was going to seduce this man, and any thought of repulsion I might have had before all this started withered away as I stood close to him, slowly unbuttoning my blouse. Once that was off, I undid his shirt, slowly rubbing my hands in the thick black hair on his chest, turned on by the feel of it, and the scent of his masculinity. I found his belt buckle, let it loose, and pulled his pants down to his ankles, where he stepped out of them. His tented briefs gave away his lust for me, and I backed away, the coy kittenish woman, just waiting for him to take me; and he did. He reached for me and took me to the bed, undressing me as he went, so that by the time we reached the bed I had only my panties to protect me. Smiling brightly, I let his thumbs strip that away, and I lay naked in front of him, smiling like a Chesire cat.
Living as a woman had made me aware of the sexual draw I had on him, and now, I used every bit of it to make him mine, even if for a short time. He reached out for me, and that afternoon I was his, and he was mine. We enjoyed each other in many ways, some we thought impossible, but youth and love conquer all, and it was an exhausted couple that fell asleep in each others arms that night. I lay snuggled up against him, his smell comforting to me, as were his hard muscled arms that held me tightly, and I had no doubt that I had done the right thing. As a woman I was entitled.
Jeff had been given different clothes to wear, and a very old woman had come in and shown him how to wear makeup, with an admonition to do it right, or else he would get the whip. He struggled to do the best he could. In the background, he could faintly hear the sounds of a party starting, and somehow, he knew he would be the star attraction.
Audrey came to see me, and as she rang the bell, she could see Greg, his strong well toned body through the thin curtains. He let her in because I was making breakfast. He had on his slacks and that was all. I stuck my head out of the kitchen and said hi, and in the brief glimpse of me, Audrey saw that I wore a robe, and probably panties, but nothing else. She joined me in the kitchen while Greg went to get dressed.
"It looks like you two have... become closer!"
My only answer was a sly grin that told Audrey all she needed to know. I poured out some coffee, and joined them at the table.
"You better be good to her Gregory Hassan! She's my sister, and I'll be watching!" She sounded stern, like an overbearing mother, but he saw the gleam in her eye and smiled.
"How true my dear Audrey, but you will soon be my sister if I have any say about it, and we all know what we do to mouthy women!" That brought a chuckle from me, then Audrey, and finally Greg. "I love this sister of yours you know, and I intend to marry her some day, so why would I ever hurt her?"
I felt like a debutante right then, all of my pent up emotions climaxed at a single moment, and I burst into tears. Audrey took me into the bedroom so we could be alone.
"God help me, but I think I love him Audrey! I'm a man in love with another man!"
"You're not a man now Jill! You're a woman and you know it! All you need is for Laura to take care of one small matter and it will be the fact rather than hope. I know you love him. I love him too. He is a good man, and I can't think of anyone I want more as a brother in law."
"But what about Michelle, and Beth?"
"If they are watching, they'll understand Jill. You have done a lot to right a terrible wrong and you should be proud of that! Now go out there and tell him you accept his proposal!"
I was grinning through my tears as I ran out of the room and slammed up against Greg, hugging him tightly and kissing him all over.
"Does this mean that you'll marry me?" He too was grinning as he carried me back to the bedroom, while Audrey slipped away, unnoticed, grinning to herself for the joy I had found in another.
Jeff was handcuffed, but otherwise free to move around. He was wearing a short, sheer, baby doll, his feet perched in heels, the old man in front of him.
"You have sinned greatly boy, otherwise you would not be here. It would be wise to listen to me carefully, and follow the rules without fail." The old man settled into a chair and looked at the pathetic person standing in front of him. "You are here to service men, and you will do so for however long it takes for you to understand your crime. These are the rules of this house. You never talk to a client at any time unless he commands you to. You will always work on the client until he manages to release. You will do whatever they tell you to do no matter what it is, or who it is. You cannot deny your body to any male that asks, and you must freely submit to whatever he wants to do to you. You will always present yourself in as womanly a manner as you can, and both dress and act as sexy as possible. You are only here to please men, not be pleased. Do you understand the rules?" Jeff hated it, but knew in his heart there was no escape, and nodded his head. He had given up without the faintest hint of a struggle, and the old man knew that Jeff was a coward of the worst kind. He had given up his manhood easily, now it was time to take his pride as well.
Ian O'Keefe sat in Ben's office, the aroma of the stinking cigars invading the office in a cloud of blue smoke.
"All is well?"
"Yes. The boy is at the house right now. Your brother spent the night with Jill by the way."
"Really! Well, maybe I'll have a sister in law sooner than I expected!"
"She's a beautiful woman and will make him a good wife."
"Yes, of course she will. I never had a doubt, none at all. I was over there this morning, and he asked her to marry him while I was there!" It was the third voice.
"So," Ben said, "You were right. Your brother should have been a woman all along, all he needed was the right push."
"Oh, he found that himself, but once he did, I provoked him a little, and he did exactly what I expected, he ran back to his own true nature, that of a woman. He was a good father and husband of course, but when that was abruptly taken away, his own mind took over, and to cope with it he became Jill again. I admit I was afraid for her at first, but she has done well, and I'm proud of her!"
"And you should be Audrey. Now then, just how do we get the old man to accept an invitation from me to go to the house?"
Somewhere else…The old man lowered his pants, and his fully erect manhood stood out.
"Take it! Make me release!" It was a command that Jeff did not accept right away, and the old woman hit him with the whip, driving him to his knees, his eyes centered on the old man's erection. "Take it!"
Slowly, Jeff lowered himself to the man and sobbing, took him, bobbing up and down until the old man found release. He was no longer a virgin, and his self respect and pride had been shattered. The woman released his wrists and told him to clean up.
Marianne called all over town looking for her husband, but he could not be found, and she started to get worried. She did not know me well enough to have my phone number, but since I had been the one to leave with Jeff, she called information, got the number, and quickly dialed. I was in the throes of passion, being tenderly administered to by a talented and eager mate when the phone rang. Greg picked up the phone on the first ring, heard Marianne's voice, and grinned at me. I could only hear one side of the conversation.
"No, he's not here Marianne. No, I was here all night with Jill, alone, and I don't know where he is. Okay, if we hear anything we'll call. Bye." He was still grinning when he told me who had called, then went back to what he was doing before the phone rang, much to my delight.
Ben called the father in law, and in contrite tones, offered to try and find some resolution to the rent problems that lay between them.
"Let me take you to a special house tonight. They have many wonderful things there, and I am sure that you'll find whatever you want there." The man agreed, thinking that he had finally wore down Benjamin Hassan, the constant terror of his legal staff.
Greg and I finally took a break, and after a shower, he drove us to his parent's house to announce the good news.
"What about your father?" I asked, "didn't he say that what I have done was wrong?"
"In a way I suppose; it's the old way, but he has been in this country for many years and understands better than most. He likes you more than he wants to give away, and my mother has asked me three times when we would be getting married. I know that they have both accepted the facts as they are, and when I tell them we are getting married, you will become the daughter they never had. I know my mother is looking forward to that." I sat next to him, gathering my strength from him, smiling, yet concerned.
Marianne was on her fourth drink, having quite forgotten all about Jeff as she and her mother sat there getting more than a little drunk. Ben had arrived, his limousine parked at the front door as his guest got in. Not many words were spoken as the car whisked them into the damp night, and into the next stage of the nightmare.
Jeff was dressed in a green satin baby doll with a matching thong and robe, his naked tits poking out hard against the thin material, his hands now adorned with bright red nail polish to match his lips. The scent of jasmine surrounded him as he stood in the corner with two other 'girls'. The sounds of laughter and men's voices in the hallway sounded the alert, and he knew, that without question, he was going to service another man that night. Quaking with fear, ashamed of what he had become, yet afraid of the whip and the old woman, he promised himself he would be the best whore he could, just so he could get out of there, and have those huge tits removed.
He saw his father in law come in first, then a tall man with golden skin. The old man had stepped out front, motioning with his arms at the three 'girls' who stood in the corner.
"As it is your first visit with us sir, I have brought a rare treat for you. This one," he pointed at Jeff, now known as Flower, "is not a virgin I'm afraid, but she is new, and eager to please you. Please, with my compliments, she is yours." The old man made a motion with his hand and pointed to the floor.
"Here?!" Jeff's father in law asked in a stunned tone of voice.
"I am afraid it must be so, since we must be sure the girls will obey you. After this one time she will be yours to do with as you please."
Flower did as she was told, hoping he would not recognize her; she reached out and unzipped his pants while the old man looked down and saw those huge tits of hers swinging free under the thin satin. The father in law reached down and felt one, rolling the nipple in his fingers, making Flower wilt in pain, but she pulled his manhood out and quickly stroked him until he was hard, then took him. He held her head, forcing himself deeper into her throat, and even as she gagged on it she tasted his seed as he pumped until he was dry. Flower had no choice but to swallow, completing the journey into oblivion, and lost manhood.
"Stand up!" The old man said, his robe swirling around him as he approached Flower. "Tell this man your name child, and tell him the right name!"
Flower saw the whip in his hand and knew it was over; any thought of inheriting the company was gone now, and he hung his head.
"Tell him!"
It was almost a shout as the old man moved closer.
"My real name is Jeffrey Benson. Sorry Dad."
It was like the father in law had been hit with a brick. The man staggered backwards, moving away from his son in law, but with each step he looked closer until he saw the truth. He spun around to see a smiling Ben, holding a video tape.
"I think we can begin our negotiations now, don't you?"
"What about him!" The old man asked, his eyes bright with anger, looking Jeff straight in the eye.
"This one has sinned many times, and each time you managed to get him out of it. He has even killed two people! He owes me many dollars for training him, and this time I will not sell. He must work for the right to be free, and I am sure that when I am done with him you will not want him. Tell your daughter that he is dead." The father in law looked at Ben, anger etched on his face, but a smiling Ben only held up the tape, and he man stormed out of the building and into the pouring rain.
Jeff Benson, known as Flower, without any pride or purpose left after that night, saw that he had no future and began to work hard, eagerly accepting is fate without question. He was used and abused by many men, yet he began to look more and more like a female, and found himself looking forward to the times he had company. He had become not only a whore, but a very talented whore.
Petra took my hands in hers and held them tightly while she smiled into my face. "You are a good woman Jill Grant. You make my son very happy." We looked to where Greg stood, with his father as they quietly talked. "Ibriham likes you more than he says child, make him yours, and he will love you forever." Then she took my hand. "Come child, we will ply our men with treats." I followed her into the spotless kitchen, and together we made a dessert for the men, and strong coffee to wash it down with.
Later, Ibriham and I stood looking out the window together. "My son loves you girl, be good to him."
I reached over and took the old man's hand in mine, caressing the hand as I spoke. "I love him too Ibriham; we have to share his love now, but I will never take his away from you. I need him, and you only want him. I think I win."
He looked into my eyes, and I saw that same twinkle I saw in Greg's. "Petra, she has always wanted a daughter. She likes you girl, can you be that daughter?"
I saw my opening, and took it. "You're a rascal! Did you know that? Petra my foot! You're the one that wants a daughter, and yes, I want to be that daughter, for both you and Petra."
He saw as a far away look came to my eye, followed by a tear. "I had a family once" I said, "and I missed them so much for so long that I thought I had lost any love I ever had. You, and Petra, Ben and Greg have taken me into your home, Greg has asked me to be his wife; I have found love again, and I intend to never let it go!"
"That is right my daughter. Never lose your love, it is worth more than the heavens. Now go! Go and make my son a happy man my daughter." I kissed him on the cheek, squeezed his hand, and went to find Greg.
In the months that followed, many things happened. Of course I had the surgery to make me complete, but I left the implants in because I liked having a full C cup. Greg liked it a lot too. Laura, down to a svelte 125 pounds, met the man of her dreams and was now smiling all of the time. She and I still took the aerobics classes, each growing closer to each other, like cousins. Ben used his new leverage to negotiate better rents and conditions for his people. Marianne, like her mother was a lush, and the old man finally sent them away to dry out, leaving the huge mansion empty, except for a room on the West wing, a very private room.
Audrey has to learned to share her children with Greg and I, and we often took them to visit Ibriham and Petra, who spoiled them like many Grandparents would, and of course, like all kids, the children soaked up every bit of attention they lavished on them. Sara quickly figured out that Ibriham wasn't quite as gruff as he pretended to be, and soon had him twisted around her little finger.
Greg and I built a new house, one big enough for the children we hoped to adopt. Greg doted on me every day and I adored him for the way he was. On our wedding day, with Audrey as the Maid of Honor and Sara as a flower girl, I walked down the aisle as a complete woman, no longer afraid of the future, my past behind me as I looked only forward to the future, and standing at the altar was a tall man, my Adonis, waiting to take me into that future. In the back of the church, hidden in the darker recesses, sat a young woman. She was wearing a flowered dress, her hair well done in a stylish manner, her makeup perfect. But if one were to look closely, they would see that the dress could not hide her very impressively pendulous breasts. They hung down, the very weight of them digging her bra straps into her shoulders. If anyone looked, they would have seen the woman smiling as I said my vows, as if she knew something nobody else did. When it was over and people filed out of the church, I saw her walking away, her swaying walk reminding me of someone, but I could not quite place her. As my friends and family grew near I forgot all about the woman with the huge breasts.
He sat in the room, the door locked, waiting for his guest. When she arrived, he placed ten one hundred dollar bills on the table, and as he watched, she slowly undressed to the beat of the music, taking the flowered dress off first, and went on until she wore only her tiny thong panties. Her breasts hung free now and he reached out to take one in each hand, manipulating them until she started to moan with delight. He was kissing and fondling them for a bit, then she knelt down and took the man, working until he was done, then she quickly got dressed.
"This is the last time dad, I found a job in another city."
"To bad. You have become really good at it."
"I know, but with Marianne coming back soon right? I have to go." The father in law watched her as she left. His entire plan for the future gone now, all because of a simple drunken party, an accident, his misuse of his political clout, and his attraction to the girl in the flowered dress, the one that used to be his son in law.
Greg and I were alone at last, and I was now a true virgin, ready to accept my man. In the night, we heard nothing, the love we had for one another drowning out all other sounds.
The shot was muted in the tall dark mansion, and as the body fell to the floor the sounds of the night went on, unaware of his death.
A week after we returned from our honeymoon I stood at the gravesite with Greg, my hand firmly in his.
"This is Greg, he and I are married now. We have corrected the terrible wrong that took you away, and I hope that you were watching. Rest in peace now."
"Look!"
I looked up to see a pair of robins, one larger, with a wide bright breast of red, the other, smaller, with muted colors. They flew by us as one, and we watched the birds until they settled on the headstone. We looked at the birds as they preened and cleaned their feathers, then suddenly, the female flew away, landing nearby. Her mate joined her in a rush of beating wings and chirping. I had come to think that the birds were telling her something, and these birds told me to go, be happy, make my husband happy, and let Michelle and Beth rest in peace.
"Kiss me" I said, and Greg did as I asked, then the two of us left, knowing that all was well. Justice had been served, the cold dish of revenge served, then put away.
1998
Revised March, 2003
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