Once a Princess, Always a Princess

by Alana

 

My girlfriend Magda stuck her head in the bathroom just as I was finishing up my moisturizing and moving on to the first stages of applying my hair care products. "Will you hurry up?" she complained.

"I'll be done in a minute."

"That's what you said twenty minutes ago. How did I wind up dating a guy who takes longer to get ready than I do? Why do you have to be such a Princess?"

"Shut up. Stop calling me that."

"I'll stop calling you that if you'll stop being one, Princess."

"Leave me alone. I'll be ready in a minute."

Forty-five minutes later I was ready to go, and I must say, I was worth the wait. I looked fantastic. Magda complained all the way to the restaurant, but I think she knew the results were worth it.

Later on in the week, she called me and wanted me to go see some chick flick with her on Saturday night. I told her I really wasn't interested, but she insisted.

"You made me go see that action flick. You can come see an intelligent drama with me. It won't kill you."

"Do we have to?"

"Yes. And I want you ready to leave by six o'clock."

"Six!"

"Yes, six. Start an hour early if you have to. I'm tired of never getting to the movies on time because you take forever to get ready, Princess."

"I told you to stop calling me that."

"Then be ready on time for a change. If you make me miss this movie, you're gonna regret it. I'm not kidding."

I laughed, and hung up the phone. She's always making these stupid threats, and nothing ever comes of it. Saturday at five o'clock I thought maybe I might start getting ready, but I was watching TV, and why should I kill myself getting ready for a stupid chick flick I don't even want to see? About ten to six I started getting ready, and when Magda showed up she wasn't in a good mood.

"I told you to be ready, Princess."

"And I told you not to call me that. What if one of my friends hears you say that?"

When we finally got to the movie, it was sold out for the night. I shrugged. "Oh, well. We can go tomorrow, or next weekend. It's just a movie."

I expected her to be angry, but she was surprisingly calm. "Once a Princess, always a Princess," she said.

Even though none of my friends were nearby, it always embarrassed me even more when she called me that in public. I think I might've blushed a little.

We went back to her place, and made love half-heartedly. I don't like to really get into it too much. I don't like getting all sweaty and getting my hair messy.

I came, and I separated myself from her and took off my condom and threw it away. She looked more than a little unsatisfied. She said she wanted some oral sex. I yawned and said, "Sure, in a minute."

Just as I was drifting off to sleep, I realized she was coming at me with a handkerchief, and shoving it in my face. I realized too late what she was doing.

"Nighty night, Princess," she said.

I woke up on the floor of her photography studio. Her face was swimming into focus.

"Morning, Princess."

Looking at myself, the first thing I could notice was that all the hair was gone from my legs. I was wearing pink panties, and pantyhose. I looked at her. I could barely talk, but I managed to say one thing. "Chloroform?"

She nodded. She held a mirror up to my face.

"Look how pretty you look, Dan. Or I guess we should call you Diana now, Princess."

There was make-up on my face.

"Oh, crap," I said. "What the hell?"

"I've got some pretty dresses I want you to try on for me, Princess."

"No," I said. I got up. "Where the hell are my clothes?"

She pointed over to one corner of the room. There was a rack of dresses.

"Where's my pants?" I asked.

"Oh, a Princess like you would never be seen dead in pants."

I started looking all over the place, trying to find my clothes. When I couldn't, I picked up the phone to call for help, and had a James Caan "Misery" moment when I realized it there was no line connecting the phone to the phone jack.

"No phone, Princess, and you might've noticed, no car outside. I had some help from a friend getting you out here, and she took your clothes with her when she left. Listen, Princess, this can all be over in a few hours if you start putting on your pretty dresses, or we can stay here all day long if we have to. Maybe even longer."

I looked outside. It was cold. Fleeing in just panties and pantyhose, or even stark naked, was not an option. I was locked out of my apartment, and I wasn't sure how to get all this damn make-up off.

So I gave up and let her have her fun. But I was damn sure going to break up with her as soon as this was over. That bitch was lucky I ever dated her in the first place.

I never would've done this if I knew she was taking pictures. I still don't know how she did it. There must've been a video camera going, or a webcam, or something.

She got some lingerie on me, put a wig atop my head, and got me into the first dress, a stupid little schoolgirl dress.

"Even a Princess has to start out in life as a schoolgirl," she said. "By the way, Princess, I hope you notice I let you keep the hair on your arms. Don't say I never did anything for you. I knew you wouldn't want your friends to know what a Princess you are."

Even though we were alone there, I was still humiliated when I put on the stupid schoolgirl dress. Once I got it on, I took the skirt in both hands and looked down at it.

I thought what my Dad would say if he could see me now, prancing around in a dress and allowing a woman to push me around, and the thought made me sick. I looked at Magda with a pathetic sad look on my face.

She started laughing at me in the dress.

"Smile!" she said. "Smile and be a pretty little Princess, or you'll be wearing that dress all day."

I tried to smile.

   

   

  

  

  

  

   

"Turn around and let me see that dress from the back, Princess."

I turned around.

    

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

   

   

      

    

  

   

    

I kept smiling, because she hadn't told me not to.

Next she put me in a short yellow dress. She said it was what a teenage Princess would wear.

   

  

   

  

    

    

    

    

 

"I got all your dresses in a thrift store, Princess. I guessed you were about a size six, and I was right. You have such a lovely figure, Princess."

She set up some chairs with a blanket draped over them, so that I could lie down on my side. She said she wanted me to show off my pretty legs. Being as she was in jeans and a sweater and sneakers and I was in this stupid dress and pantyhose and high heels, I didn't see any reason why I should help her move or arrange the chairs.

"Don't put yourself out, Princess. I don't want you to spoil your manicure helping me."

It was actually true that I had just gotten a manicure two days before.

Once she finally got the chairs the way she wanted, she made me pose to show off my legs, and smile.

And since the chairs were set up that way, she put me in another short dress and made me pose and show off my legs, yet again. It was really uncomfortable, lying that way, but she told me to smile, so I just kept smiling. Anything to get this over with.

She laughed at me. "You have such beautiful legs, Princess."

"When is this going to be over?" I complained.

"Patience, Princess. You've got a lot more pretty dresses to wear. Now it's time for the Princess to go to the disco."

She put me in a flowered disco dress, and some black high heels. There was a string tie in back that she had to tie for me.

"Smile, Princess!"

     

         

       

 

I turned my back on her. I was so mad at her, and I didn't want her to see how sick and miserable I felt. I felt like crying.

Something she had said earlier came back to me, now. "How will you be able to contact your friend to come get you, if there's no phone? Have you got a cell phone?"

"I don't have a cell phone. Don't worry your pretty little head about that, Princess. I promise, if you cooperate, this will all be over in a few hours. But you might just be stuck here for a few days or more, if you don't SMILE, Princess! Right now!"

I looked at her over my shoulder. I smiled, trying not to look as miserable as I felt.  

       

"Hey, you look great in those over-the-shoulder poses, Princess! We'll have to do that one again."

Next she put me in a pink silk flowered dress. She told me to smile and look coy. I had no idea what "coy" looked like, but I tried. I smiled and looked like I was dreaming of a happier time. A time when I was allowed to wear pants.

"Can't I sit down and rest for awhile?" I complained, looking down at my feet. "These stupid high heels are killing me."

    

   

     

    

    

    

     

    

   

    

I bent over to massage my leg.

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

       

"Very well," she said. She rolled out a chair for me to sit on. "But if you think THOSE heels are high, just you wait, Princess! You know, you look like kind of like a secretary in that pretty dress. Let me get a pad and pen."

I was so happy to be off my feet, I didn't even object as she had me cross my legs and pose like a secretary with the pen and pad of paper.

I still didn't mind when she had me pivot a little to one side, so my legs were more prominent.

 

 

 

 

  

 

  

  

  

  

  

      

"OK, Princess, that's long enough. Get up. I've got a sexy red dress I want you to wear." 

She got me into this red satin dress, and put a different wig on my head. Then she had me put on these red high heels that were much higher than the other ones. I could hardly walk in them. I complained, and moaned, and she just laughed.

I stood there in the red satin dress and just looked at her.

"Smile! Why do I always have to remind you to smile, Princess! I'll tell you what, lets do that pose again, where you look over your shoulder at me and smile."

I did it. Anything to get this over with and get out of those painful high heels.

"Let me sit down, now," I said.

"OK, as long as you sit down properly like the Princess you are. Make sure to keep your legs crossed." She moved out a chair for me again, and I sat down. I didn't even mind so much when she made me pose with one hand on my hip, as long as I was off my feet.

 

"Now, here's a cute dress," she said, bringing out a strangely colored frock. I took off the red high heels before I stood up, and limped over to where she was. She took off the red wig I was wearing, and replaced it with the one I was wearing before. Then I had to change dresses. Once I was wearing the other dress, she made me put back on the black high heels. But they didn't seem all that bad compared to the other ones.

"Spread out your skirt a little," she said. "Show off your dress and smile, Princess."

I tried to do what she said.

"Let's do another over-the-shoulder pose, again. Smile!"

I did the pose for her, and she laughed. I kept telling myself that it was only the two of us, here. This would all be over, soon.

  

    

"OK, Princess, I've got a pretty pink striped dress for you to wear."

I put on the dress, and I just went right into the over-the-shoulder pose she liked so much, and I smiled without being told to. She laughed at how obedient I was. Anything to get this over with.

   

    

    

   

    

    

    

     

I moaned at the sight of the next ultra-feminine dress she had for me, with its ruffles all over. It looked like something the Lennon sisters might've worn forty years ago. Magda laughed at the sound of my moaning. I put it on. She had another glamour wig for me to wear, and she had me change back into the white high heels. She told me to smile, and I smiled about as much as I could, though my patience was wearing thin.

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Look at yourself, Princess! Don't you look adorable in your pretty dress!" She laughed. "You were born to wear frilly dresses like this! You're so lovely and feminine! No wonder you love wearing a dress so much! I'll bet your friends just love it when you slip into a pretty dress and show up to play touch football! No wonder you spend so much time with your friends. They must love being friends with a pretty little Princess like you!"

I looked at her with a kind of melancholy anger. I felt pathetic and mad at the same time.

 

    

"What do I wear next?" I asked impatiently.

  

   

   

   

   

  

  

  

   

  

  

 

Next it was another damn little girl dress. A red and white dress, with more ruffles and a stupid little red bow at the collar. I put it on.

I looked down at myself and felt even more humiliated than before, if such a thing was possible.

She told me to smile, and I tried. I really did.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finally I just erupted. "Why are you doing this to me?" I cried. "What do you want out of me? All this, just because I take too much time getting ready? Is that it? Fine, I promise I won't take more than fifteen minutes getting ready! Is that what you want to hear?"

She laughed and applauded.

"Well done, Princess! You actually managed to figure out what someone else wants! Someone other than you. It's almost like you're being considerate. I'll tell you what---I had a few more dresses for you to try on, including a lovely princess gown, but if you're really ready to try being considerate, maybe I might give you a chance."

"I promise! I promise to be considerate!"

"Repeat after me: I promise to never again take more then fifteen minutes in the bathroom getting ready. If I ever again take more than fifteen minutes getting ready, may I always wear pretty dresses, pantyhose, high heels and lipstick for the rest of my life, just like I'm wearing right now. If I ever again take more than fifteen minutes getting ready, may I spend the rest of my life in a dress, and never wear pants ever again."

I repeated it, and I didn't screw up a word.

She applauded again. "OK, Princess, slip out of that pretty dress, and I'll call my friend."

She took out the phone line, which she had hidden as part of her belt, and hooked up the phone.

"Get this make-up off of me!" I said.

"Take it off yourself," she said, pointing to the basin. "Use plenty of soap."

"This will come off in soap and water?"

"Sure. What, did you think it was tattooed on?"

It took three tries, but with plenty of soap and water I managed to get it all off, while Magda phoned her friend. I hid in the bathroom while I waited. I unbuttoned the dress I was wearing, got it off and threw it on the bathroom floor. I took off the wig and the high heels and threw them right on top of the dress. Off went the slip, the bra and girdle, the pantyhose and the panties. I left them all right there on the floor, not even bothering to hang them up, which I would've if they were my own clothes.

I listened to Magda's friend arriving. I heard them laughing, but I didn't hear what they were saying. I didn't want to hear. Magda arrived at the door with my clothes.

"Send her away!" I hissed to Magda.

"Princess, she drove my car all the way out here. How is she going to get home?"

"I don't care. She can get a cab. I'll pay for it." My wallet was in my pants. I took it out and gave Magda a twenty.

"Send her away!" I repeated.

A few days later I was in my apartment, getting ready for Magda to show up so I could break up with her. I would normally do this in a restaurant so she wouldn't make a scene, but I didn't look forward to her calling me Princess in public, maybe telling everyone in the place what she made me do. I would rather take the risk of Magda attacking me, even going for the eyes.

Just for fun, I decided to try what I had promised. I took slightly less than fifteen minutes getting ready. I showered, and avoided all my usual expensive hair care products, instead washing my hair with some cheap drug store shampoo. I dried my face and body and hair with a towel, not even bothering to blow dry. I shaved as quickly as I could, and didn't use any of my usual cleansing lotions or moisturizers. I combed my hair quickly, and I was done.

I looked like crap. Still, if this was what she wanted, fine.

Magda arrived, carrying a manila folder. "The photos came out fine, Princess. Look!"

She handed the folder to me. I looked at the photos in shock, then I looked back at her.

"How did you take these? I never saw a camera."

"I have my ways, Princess. Don't worry your pretty little head about it."

"What are you going to do with 'em?"

"Oh, that all depends. I might show them to your friends. Or not. It all depends on you, Princess."

I looked away. I imagined my friends seeing me smiling and posing in all these stupid dresses. I tried to imagine a time when something like this might blow over, when things might get back to normal with my friends, when they could look at me without smirking and making jokes. I couldn't imagine it. I would have to get all new friends.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing much. Just stick to your promise and treat me decently. Are you about to get ready to go?"

"I'm ready."

"Oh. Well, you look OK, I guess. Let's grab some dinner."

Since then, she's kept the photos to herself, but she still calls me Princess all the time, even though I've kept to my promise about getting ready in a hurry. Thankfully she's never called me Princess in front of any of my friends.

Lately she's been hinting about marriage. Joking about me in a wedding gown. Man, I wish I could get ahold of those photos.

  

  

  

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