Hi, all. After I posted the first version of this story, a lot of feedback was about how many holes had been left in the thing. Or if there was some hidden conspiracy to force Jack into becoming Jacqueline, why hadn’t it been at least shown even briefly?

This revision, in several installments, will hopefully fill the holes, and give explanations as needed or desired. I guess it won’t be giving much away to tell everyone that there is indeed a conspiracy to completely feminize poor Jack so making a woman, and mother, out of him. I’m at the heart of it, so is Noel, and all of you readers out there. I hope you enjoy the revisions.

Maggie

No portion of this copyrighted material may be archived or stored on any other internet site or used in any manner without prior consent.

(a rewrite of Maggie Finson’s ‘Mommy’)

 

Mommy II - Revised             by: Maggie Finson & Noel Lexicon

 

********************* Part I *********************

October 31, 1997, is a date that I’ll never forget! My life changed drastically that day and I never saw it coming. I really had no idea! But then the day didn’t start normally, even for then, so I suppose what followed shouldn’t have surprised me all that much.

"Quit squirming so much!"

The voice was that of my wife Lisa. She was five feet six inches of lovely brunette with a temper and mouth more appropriate for a redhead. She was also the mother of our two children, though few believed that after seeing her school girl voluptuous body.

"If I mess up your eyes I’ll have to start all over and that’ll just take that much longer."

I raised my hand signaling for a pause. "I need to adjust things," I said reaching towards my groin. The clothes she had me in were binding in unpleasant ways. I reached inside and tried to adjust my undergarments.

"Is it your testicles? Are they bothering you again, honey?" she asked patting me solicitously on the thigh. When I looked at her I sensed a strange undercurrent in her concern but nothing I could pinpoint - and anyway it was quickly gone. She was referring to the strange malady that had recently plagued me. Every fourteenth day for the last three months my testicles had swelled painfully only to slowly subside back to normal over the next ten days. Then they’d swell again on the next fourteenth day starting the strange cycle anew. We’d been waiting to see if I could throw off whatever it was because other than some occasional wooziness (and the swelling) there weren’t any side effects.

At least, none until last Wednesday. Last Wednesday I had become impotent.

"I’m fine," I said dispiritedly.

A bald faceed lie and we both knew it. My self-esteem was still reeling from the emotional devastation of impotence. I sat back and let Lisa resume working on my face wondering for the hundredth time why I’d ever agreed to wear this costume. Lisa and her best friend Nadine, who also worked at the same restaurant Lisa and I did, had been on me for weeks about it. Ever since the owner and working boss, Eileen Bradley, had announced she was continuing the restaurant’s Halloween tradition of all staff working Halloween day in some kind of costume.

"I’ll bet you’re the cutest waitress there today," Lisa said. She smiled contentedly as she finished coating my eyelids with plum colored eye shadow. "And your hair is going to look terrific, Jackie."

Jackie! Lisa’s feminization of my name from Jack to Jaquelyn, Jackie for short, was not setting well with me. At least we weren’t fighting, which had been a pretty common thing since I’d lost the high paying job we’d moved across three states for me to take. After a hasty and totally futile search I had taken the only opening I could find - book keeper and glorified gofer at Eileen’s Place.

"I’ll just be happy to get the curlers out of it," I said tersely. The pay at Eileens was lousy, the hours long, but with two little girls to support, we needed me to have a job. Thankfully, Lisa had finally started job hunting again for something more than part-time table waiting.

"How is that job prospect looking?" I asked.

Lisa frowned. Her own inability to hold a job thanks to her temper and intemperate mouth was one sore point among many that I seldom brought up any more.

"Oh, I should know more after today’s interview," she said breezily. "I’ll be leaving Caroline and Katherine with Jenny next door, so if you get home before I do, that’s where the brats will be."

The ‘brats’! I tamped my irritation. Caroline, age two, and Katherine, age one, were sore points two and three with my wife. She didn’t care for being a mother at all and continually blamed me for her pregnancies. Re-fighting the same argument over and over got old after awhile.

"All right," I said without dinging her for calling the children brats. I sighed in relief when she began removing the tiny curlers I’d worn since early last night. "Do you really think you’ll be that late?"

"The interview is clear across town!"

She brushed my hair with more force than I thought necessary then chuckled when she saw me wince. "Now you’re getting an idea of what I go through when you want me to look nice, Jackie dear."

I closed my eyes as she used her hair spray on me. As the spraying continued I knew she was being much more liberal with it than she was when she sprayed her own hair. After some fluffing and teasing, with several pauses for critical looks and readjustments, she seemed satisfied with my new hairstyle. "I still think we could afford for you to drive me to work this morning instead of my taking the bus in this getup," I said. "You’re the one who’s always harping about economizing," Lisa said abruptly. She looked at me with an inexplicable determination and I could sense anger just below the surface. What imaginary wrong had I committed now? "It’s my day for shopping and I’ll need the car to get to the interview this afternoon," she said. "Besides, you always take the bus on Wednesdays. What’s the big deal?" "The big deal is I don’t normally stand at the bus stop wearing a waitress’s uniform, with curled hair and in full makeup," I replied snappishly.

I didn’t bother mentioning the nylons or perfume I had on. I gave my wrist another cautious sniff and decided that maybe the perfume she had doused me with wasn’t quite as strong as I had originally feared. As the skin on my arm brushed against my face I couldn’t help wondering when my skin had gotten so soft. It had never seemed soft like this before. But then my arms had never been shaved like this before either. I looked from my shaven arm to Lisa.

"All of this is going to make for a real long bus ride this morning."

"Oh, don’t be such a baby!" Lisa’s face reflected her irritation. She gestured impatiently for me to stand. "Girls ride the bus every day and nothing happens to them, you know!" "That’s the operative word here," I said. "Girls - something I’m not. Wearing female clothing I’m liable to get myself beaten up if I’m not careful."

"So I guess you’d better be careful, hadn’t you?" Lisa giggled at her own answer. I knew she was having her petty revenge for us having to sell the second car she had used before I lost my job as a shipping comptroller. She had taken that as a personal affront, as if I had deliberately lost the job just to curtail her freedom. Unfortunately, that was also how she viewed ‘the brats’.

"Just use that sweet girl voice you’ve been practicing all week and no one will even notice. You look so darling that I’d have trouble telling you weren’t the real thing if I hadn’t helped get you ready. Now let’s get you into your uniform, Jackie dear." "I can hardly wait," I said sarcastically.

Who could be enthused about being stuffed into a tight girdle with panties and encased in sheer panty hose rolled over smoothly shaven legs. But most embarrassing of all were the startlingly realistic breast forms Lisa had borrowed from one of her friends. They seemed unbelievably large even though they were realistic in both shape and color except they seemed to wobble and jiggle far more than natural breasts did. Or perhaps I should say far more than Lisa’s did. "Are you sure these come off with vinegar?" I asked looking at my synthetic breast adorned chest. I reached around and felt the right butt pad she had glued on me. It felt ridiculously large and my touch set the skin to complaining about how it was now stretched.

Lisa saw me examining the wobbly breast forms on my chest and feeling my ass. She had bonded both to me to after we first woke this morning.

"Playing with the goodies?" she questioned snidely.

I took a large breath and slowly exhaled - trying for calm.

"I just don’t want to be stuck in these things you attached any longer than I have to be."

As I stood there watching Lisa fuss over me, I wondered about myself. What had possessed me to put my knees on the floor and lay face down on the bed while she glued realistic shaped buttocks pads onto each cheek of my butt? The large wobbly breast forms maybe, but the butt forms? I know it supposedly was for the Halloween costume day at Eileens, but what did me having a bubble butt have to do with that? And even worse, since she glued the butt forms on with me bent over, when I stood upright, the pads pulled at the skin on my ass and groin in disturbing ways. And the breast forms felt like gigantic weights. I must be stupid!

"Well, just be careful handling the wishbone dressing at work or you’ll find yourself wishing I had used a lot stronger glue. Here, put this on."

I pulled on the white knee length slip and found its presence almost a relief. It hugged my suddenly shapely form and more importantly helped hold those super wobbly globes inside the C sized cups of Lisa’s bra.

Next came the dress. It was yellow nylon with a white Peter Pan collar, elbow length sleeves, turned back white cuffs and a pretty knee length skirt. At least I’d always thought the dress pretty when it was on Nadine. Now that I was wearing it I wasn’t so certain. And worse, the way the glued on forms reshaped me, I filled the dress as curvaceously as Nadine! More so actually, and that caused me all sorts of uneasy feelings - Nadine was always getting hit on at work. I sighed. At least they hadn’t insisted on the pink one.

Then there was the snowy white, ruffled, bib apron. Its straps went over my shoulders, then crossed just below the shoulder blades before joining with the back and tying in a large bow at the small of my back. The apron covered most of the dress in front except for two inches of skirt and went all the way around to let just a sliver of yellow peek through from behind. Enough yellow that the bow and its strings contrasted nicely. One of the below hip off-center apron pockets held an order pad and pen.

"Here’s your name tag, Jackie," Lisa said. She was actually smirking as she pinned the heart shaped, lace edged black badge to the apron just above my left ‘breast’.

It announced cheerfully in bright gold cursive letters that my name was Jackie and that I was very happy to serve you. It had belonged to another girl who had quit Eileens before I’d started ­ she’d left it behind. Nadine had seized upon the similarities of names and included the badge with the rest of the costume she and my wife had put together. Lisa picked up a small cap and handed it to me.

"And now your crown."

I looked at Lisa curiously then took the cap without word. It was the one she always wore. The stiffly standing little cap was no more than a strip of yellow fabric edged with white lace. I carefully pinned it to my honey blonde hair. The blondeness was courtesy of a bottle of hair dye Lisa had applied to my usually sandy colored shoulder length mane. When I was done Lisa held out a pair of white, soft-soled women’s loafers. The glimpse I got of my legs as I slipped the shoes on made me shudder. In the nylons, my calves and ankles appeared sleek and alluring ­ and unmistakably feminine!

"I always thought you had great legs," Lisa said. Great legs! She was really getting her pound of flesh. I wasn’t about to retort or let her know that the sensual sleekness of my hose covered legs was strangely bothering me. Lisa walked to the dresser and came back with a faux pearl choker and a pair of matching clip-on white earrings that actually looked pierced. There was also a matching bead bracelet for my right wrist and a pink faced ladies watch on a narrow white leather band. I had been outfitted with the complete package including long red fingernails glued over my own. When I had everything on Lisa stood back and admired her work. A broad satisfied grin slowly filled her face.

"The rest of you turned out just as good, Jackie. Have a look!" I stepped over to the full-length mirror and found myself in shock. I shook my head in vigorous denial.

"No way am I going anywhere looking like this," I said adamantly. I was looking at a complete stranger, a female stranger, and one that was attractive. And that may have been what disconcerted me the most - she was damned attractive! Honey blonde hair hung in tight, bouncy curls while curly bangs swept off to one side of her face to accentuate her right eye. And her eyes, with the plum colored eye shadow, the thickly curling lashes, and the glorious blue color were simply mesmerizing. And when I turned sideways I understood why I had had problems getting the dress over my butt ­ I had a bubble butt to match my bubble chest. I was turned on by my own image.

Lisa had taken my fine-featured oval face and transformed it into something you saw smiling at you from the cover of most women’s fashion magazines. It was a face with beckoning large eyes, high beauty-model cheeks, an aquiline nose, and a full red mouth all completed by a feminine appearing chin. She was attractive! Very attractive! Only she was me, who was a guy, and the father of two children. A father now sporting bold 34C breasts, a high narrow waist, and sharply curving thirty-six inch hips.

My five foot six height and slight build had been something I had fought misconceptions about for many years. And now, Lisa had, in only two days, turned those features into a sexy waitress - a waitress I was ready to fall in love with. Only like I said, it was me!

"Don’t be silly, Jackie," Lisa said.

She was standing behind me looking in the mirror, intently watching my reactions to my now feminine image. Her voice was low and throaty - she was literally purring. Lisa reached forward and fluffed the curly mass of hair around my ears then patted my ass triumphantly.

"You’re absolutely scrumptious, darling. You’re going to be a big hit at the restaurant."

"That’s what I’m worried about," I muttered.

I continued staring at my feminine image in reluctant awe. The pearl choker I was wearing elegantly graced the girl in the mirror’s slender neck and set off the white pearls at her ear lobes. The dress/apron combination made her female shape appear even more feminine. I no longer doubted Lisa’s claim. "Which is why I don’t want to leave the house in this getup. I’ll get mauled at the bus stop," I said.

"Now you’re being silly and stubborn," Lisa said pouting. "After all the work I went to so you’d look great today and you want to ruin the whole thing. And even if you don’t care about my feelings, Eileen did say everyone had to come to work today in costume and there’s not enough time for anything else." I sensed a fight in the making. Well, it was just for Halloween and how tough could one day be? As I continued looking at my image in the mirror I knew the answer ­ it could be tough! Real tough! But I couldn’t think of a single reasonable alternative.

"Okay, I’ll go as is." The heavy resignation in my voice clearly reflected my misgivings.

"Since you’re so worried about the guys hitting on you," Lisa said ­ and her look told me she thought that was more than a remote possibility, "you can wear these to show you’re already taken." She removed her own wedding and engagement bands then worked them onto the third finger of my left hand. When she was done she patted my ass and gave me another smirking smile.

I glared at her, but said nothing. It was a good idea!

"Jack, look at me," Lisa said. Her voice was stern and commanding. I looked at her curiously. When she had my full attention she clapped her hands together loudly, twice. "Jacquelyn Mommy, Jack. You’re Jacquelyn Mommy now."

For a moment I couldn’t concentrate. Then a sense of well being filled me. Moments later Lisa’s voice came to me out of a fog.

"Open your eyes now, Jacquelyn dear."

I did and was surprised to find myself facing the front door. "You’ll do wonderful," said Lisa giving me a farewell hug. She glanced at the clock. "If you don’t hurry, you won’t have to wait on the bus because you’re going to miss it." I looked at my pink-faced watch and nodded. So it was that with a knee length bright blue women’s coat, a light brown shoulder bag filled with ‘necessities’, and a long ladies wallet containing my money and ID, I left the small house we rented and made my way nervously to the bus stop.

Because of the late October cold morning air I was overly conscious of the skirt swishing against my mostly bare legs. And then my swaying ‘breasts’ went so far as to jiggle fetchingly as I ran the last ten yards or so to catch the bus before it pulled away from the corner. I don’t even want to describe what the butt forms made my ass feel like. I was breathing hard from the run when I stepped inside the bus and found all eyes on me. My god they all knew! Then, as I realized most of the men were staring at my fake boobs, it dawned on me that everyone, at least the male everyone’s, had probably watched with interest the already mentioned jiggles as I had run for the bus. I blushed to the tips of my toes and had the steel floor opened beneath me, I would have gladly fallen through. The bus driver coughed politely. I looked at her dumbly until she pointed at the coin box. Money! Of course! She wanted money for the fare. Blushing once again, and feeling all kinds of stupid, I fumbled with the unfamiliar impediment of a purse instead of easily reachable pockets. I had to pull a plastic wrapped item completely out to get at my wallet and my change. Once I’d dropped the fare into the collection box, I glanced at what I was holding in my other hand ­ and blushed worse than ever. It was a brightly wrapped maxi pad.

Damn Lisa! She was the one that had loaded my purse with the ‘necessities’. I could almost hear her laughing. The bus driver, an attractive woman in her early thirties, offered me a commiserating smile but said nothing. The shared ‘woman to woman’ intimacy seemed to say it all anyway. Still blushing I looked for an empty seat. There were none! "Here, honey," said a middle-aged man gallantly standing to offer me his. "You can have this one. I’m getting off in a few stops."

My smile of thanks was interrupted by a gasp as one of his hands deliberately brushed against my chest and the other managed to collide with my fanny as the bus began moving. He’d copped a feel and patted my ass all in one smoothly executed maneuver. And afterwards the bastard had the nerve to give me an innocent smile!

Far too mortified and stunned for even a mild protest, I lowered my eyes to my lap and clasped both hands firmly onto my purse. As I thought about what had just happened, getting felt up by a male, I blushed again. Damn Lisa! By the time I had gathered enough nerve to give the guy a piece of my mind he was gone. Feeling as if every eye, every male eye at least, was on my backside, I got off and began walking the half block from the bus stop to Eileens. My reflection in a store’s plate glass window nearly stopped me. Not only was the young woman I was pretending to be very attractive, but she moved her body in a way guaranteed to draw male eyes. What was going on? I wasn’t consciously trying to sway my hips seductively! As I continued puzzling over the mystery of my image I noticed something else, I was holding my purse with a feminine limp wrist. That realization upset me so much I started debating about turning around and going home.

"Jackie!" Nadine shouted.

I looked up and saw Nadine approaching Eileen’s front door from the other direction. She was wearing an ankle length costume meant to be Cleopatra. It showed a surprising amount of cleavage and confirmed what I had always suspected, that her busty appearance was due to her own assets and was all her. Undoubtedly she would get lots of tips today. I returned her wave.

Nadine’s friendliness was more a by-product of her friendship with Lisa than any real warmth for me, so I always overlooked the bitchiness that occasionally found me as its target. I didn’t want anyone at Eileens mad at me and I especially didn’t want to give Lisa another reason for fighting.

"Oh, my god, you’re gorgeous!" she said excitedly when we both reached the front door. "And you move as if you’d been that way all your life, girl."

She continued to look me up and down. Finally she grinned impishly. "Bet you had an interesting ride to work on the bus."

I couldn’t help it. The memory of being groped returned and I blushed all over. No way was I telling anyone a guy had felt me up. I would never live it down! Nadine saw my blush and smirked knowingly.

"Jack?"

Eileen was behind the counter when we walked in and glanced up briefly before doing a double take that would have done justice to an old time slapstick comedy. For being the boss Eileen was a warm person and nice to work for, even if she was a bit of a slave driver.

"As much as I hate to admit it, yes," I said grimly. Eileen stood staring at me in disbelief. Finally, unable to satisfy her curiosity from there, she walked out from behind the counter and circled me several times. Even up close she couldn’t seem to believe what she was seeing. She checked every part of me out closely and even grinned when she noticed my name badge.

"You look great," she said nodding in genuine approval. My appearance had surprised her almost as much as it had me. Another employee had come in and was watching curiously as Eileen examined me. I had heard her exclamation of disbelief when Nadine told her I was Jack.

"Go clock in girls, then set up for your shift," Eileen said finally.

As Nadine and I walked towards the hallway I felt Eileen’s eyes on me all the way. The time clock was in the employee lounge area at the very back. Since business was generally light early mornings, Eileen normally ran the counter. As usual, the only other people in the place at this time of day were Christine the cook, and her daughter Melanie, who washed dishes and did odds and ends around the restaurant. Melanie was a thinner, younger version of her still pretty mother.

"Who’s the new girl, Nadine?" Christine asked as we passed the kitchen. Melanie looked up from the table she was cleaning and cackled. I had fooled her mother also.

"This is Jackie," Nadine said in a serious tone. "Isn’t she just the sexiest thing?" Then she broke out in hilarious giggles totally unable to restrain herself. "It’s Jack, done up for Halloween," she managed finally.

"No way!" Christine said. Exempt from the costume requirement because of her job, Christine gave me a long hard look. Finally she pursed her lips together and let out a low whistle. "Jackie, honey, you’re going to make a lot in tips if you keep wagging your tail like that." Then she broke out in raucous laughter.

"Funny! Very funny, Christine" I said. Unfortunately my quick turn set vibrations off in my bosom and sent Christine into more gales of laughter.

"And you’ve got a real sexy tail to wiggle, Jackie," shouted Melanie. Even Eileen was laughing.

"God," I muttered, "am I going to get this all day?" I could feel heat in my face and knew I must be bright red. "Probably, Jackie," said Nadine giggling as she clocked in. "Lisa really did you proud - you look all girl! Is that your own hair?"

Clocking in myself, I nodded and gave the mass of tight, bouncy curls a rueful pat.

"You remind me of that old cartoon character you see off and on these days," said Nadine. She tilted her head and stared at me some more. "You know, Betty Boop?"

"Great," I muttered.

I headed for the office area where I would spend most of the day and grimaced as Nadine’s laughter followed me up the hall. Things could hardly have been worse. Now I looked like some black and white cartoon character - on top of being prime pick up material. A minute later Nadine popped in the door of the office and gave my butt a light pat.

"Come on, honey, Eileen wants you up front for something."

"Take the counter, Jackie."

Eileen grinned at me and waved to the area she usually took care of. I had covered the counter before, but only when things were really busy or I was caught up with the bookkeeping. "But the books . . ."

"You look way too scrumptious to be hiding in back today, honey," she said.

Scrumptious? I stared pointedly at Eileen. Her grin proved infectious.

"Okay," I said finally. I moved behind the counter and let out a long resigned sigh. "I should have known this would happen," I said mostly to myself.

"You look the part, honey," Eileen said. She chuckled and gave my bubble butt a friendly pat. "Just remember to smile at the customers and I’ll bet you make a killing on tips." "Yeah, right!" I was still shaking my head at her when two businessmen came in and sat at the counter. I moved to get menus for them.

"Coffee, guys?"

Both nodded and gave me warm smiles. Not because they knew I was a guy dressed as a waitress, but for the very pretty young thing waiting on them. I’d seen a lot of our customers give Nadine that same kind of smile. As I stood there waiting I resisted the urge to try to rearrange my fanny. I knew it was the skin pulling at me standing straight up and nothing I could do except get them off was going to help the slight discomfort. Then my nipples begin itching as the men continued ogling me. I groaned silently. With the breast forms also glued on, my nipples were another itch I couldn’t scratch. I should have remembered they’d started itching a couple weeks ago before letting Lisa glue the breast forms onto me. One more thing I was going to have to suffer through today. Getting home tonight was going to be such a relief! I poured the men their coffee and handed them menus."

"What?" One of them asked with a raised eyebrow. "Eileen let you get away without wearing a costume today?"

"Give her a break," Eileen said before I could explain about my costume. "Jackie just started this morning. She didn’t know about our Halloween tradition and it wouldn’t have been fair expecting her to come up with something on such short notice anyway."

All I could do over her use of the feminine gender in describing me was to close my eyes and pray the day went quickly. It was clear that until someone penetrated my disguise, I was going to be the new ‘girl’ at Eileens. Damn Lisa!

The guys chose to interpret my embarrassment as my newness and my lack of costume. Eileen herself was dressed as a male chef, so without anyone knowing that I really was a guy in costume, I did look out of synch. But that didn’t stop the way their eyes appreciatively ran up and down my tricked out figure for the entire time they were there. I got a five-dollar tip out of each one!

"We want you to come back, Jackie," one of them said. "It’s time Nadine had some competition around here." He winked at me as he paid his bill. This was after my astounded surprise at their gratuities.

I got through the first part of the morning without once being tagged as a guy in a dress, which was really kind of demoralizing, but also a little thrilling - I was really pulling off the impersonation! Also, the tips were better than pretty good. I’d made over fifty dollars by the time I got a break for a quick bite of lunch before the lunch rush got into full swing. "Jackie!"

Eileen was behind the counter again. She was greeting all the lunch goers as they entered and left. Eileens Halloween costume day was an enjoyed tradition and many people dropped in just to see her staff’s costumes.

"Take tables five through twelve," she said.

"But I’ve never waited tables before in my life, Eileen."

"So? Start now. We’re really busy today." With that Eileen waved towards the tables she wanted me to cover.

"Whatever!" I said as I move out from behind the counter. "I’m a bookkeeper, not a waitress."

"Today you’re a waitress, Jackie," Eileen said chuckling. She looked me over for about the thousandth time. "And you look all girl. You’ll do fine, honey, so get your tail moving." Funny thing, except for the fast pace, the job didn’t seem all that hard. I remembered who ordered what, which table got which batch of orders and who got what at each table without even looking at the tickets. And more importantly, I kept my customers reasonably happy - especially the men. When I finally found a moment for my first floor break I couldn’t believe two hours had passed.

"You’ve got a real flair for this kind of work, Jackie honey,"

Eileen said handing me a coke. "And the way you wiggle your butt is just the cutest thing."

Wiggle my butt? I blushed once again. "Eileen, I’m not wiggling my butt. It’s . . . it’s this costume."

"Sure it is, Jackie honey! Your tips are probably close to Nadine’s today and she’s running hot in that boobie flaunting costume of hers."

Eileen looked at me with a knowing smile. A smile that said she knew a delicious secret. I started to argue further then exhaled in loud resignation. What good was it going to do? Tomorrow Halloween would be over and Jack would be back. "And girl, it looks like you’re enjoying yourself," Nadine said walking by with an order.

Eileen sent me an inquiring look by raising an eyebrow. I shrugged. Even though the day had been more enjoyable than I had expected I was really looking forward to getting home. My nipples seemed to react to long male stares and not being able to scratch them was slowly driving me crazy and the constant pulling of my skin by the butt forms would have had me in a constant state of erection had I not been impotent. And dealing with all the clothes when I needed to pee was a frustration I wouldn’t have wished on my worst enemy.

Then there was that small ache in my lower legs that had made itself felt an hour ago. I gave my skirt a little flip with one hand while taking a sip of my coke then realized what I had done when I saw Eileen’s smirk. Damn! Why couldn’t I stop doing things like that? I realized Eileen was still waiting for an answer.

"Sitting in the office all day staring at figures gets kind of boring. At least this is a change," I said not really meeting her eyes.

Eileen’s smirk changed to a grin ­ one my father had always called shit-eating. Only a blind man could have missed it. "And not just because of the clothes," I said hastily. "Dealing with the customers this much has been educational." I knew my face was red again ­ so what was new?

"Not to mention lucrative," Nadine said as she walked up to take her own break. She cast an almost envious glance at my tip jar. "Girl, you ought to consider a career change. You’re better at this than lots of girls who have been at it for years!" I snorted. "I’m a guy, Nadine. Even if I don’t look like one just now."

"That would severely disappoint a lot of hopeful fellows who’ve been going gaga over Eileen’s new girl. Wouldn’t it, Eileen? And I didn’t notice you telling any of the customers you’ve been wiggling your butt for that you’re a guy," Nadine said nastily. I felt my face grow warm. I bit back the sharp answer that had been on the tip of my tongue. I wasn’t wiggling my butt. Was I? Could I be doing something unconsciously as compensation for my impotence? I exhaled noisily. God I was going to be thankful when this day was finally over.

"After Eileen called me a her, " I said slowly, "every time it came up, either you, Eileen, or one of the other waitresses always announced ‘she’s on her first day, so don’t tease the poor girl’. What was I supposed to do?"

"Go on being a good sport, I guess." Eileen said laughing at my pained expression. "Leta and Carrie are having as much fun watching you as the customers are watching the rest of us. You’ve been really great about it so far, honey."

"How many offers for dates you got so far, Jackie?" As if conjured by her name, Leta Prescott, a bouncy blonde on the other side of plump, appeared on Eileen’s left. She gave me a lewd wink. "Not counting outright propositions?" Nadine added putting her hands to her breasts in a suggestively sordid motion. She then completed my mortification. "Why, Sugah, I would have slapped a couple of those guys silly for suggesting what they did to you?" All of the waitresses cackled. To them it was hilarious - a male suffering some of the same stuff they had to put up with from time to time. That the jerks doing it had mistaken me for a girl was just too delicious as far as they were concerned. It was a lot less humorous from my point of view. "So how many?" Leta asked with an insistent grin. "I haven’t been keeping track," I mumbled ­ which was pretty truthful. After about ten, I’d given up counting. And as for some of the ruder suggestions, only my lengthened fingernails and the way I was dressed had kept me from belting several of Eileen’s customers. "That many?" Her retort caused Leta and the others to break out in renewed laughter.

"Did you take any of them up on their offers, Jackie honey?" Nadine asked insinuatingly.

"What?" My momentary confusion only added to the general mirth. "Come on, give me a break," I said letting a little of my irritation show.

"You’re doing swell, honey," Leta said giving my arm an encouraging pat. "And I promise, you’ll only have to endure our teasing until next Halloween."

"You have no idea of how much better that makes me feel, Leta." I managed a weak smile. Leta was a warm soul and I had never found anything nasty in her teasing.

"Oh, oh, another rush coming."

Leta adjusted her witch’s hat, hefted her broom and swept witch-like towards her station. The rest of us soon followed as the tables in our areas began filling up.

When my shift finally ended, six P.M., I felt as if I’d run a hundred miles. We’d been that busy. As I was clocking out Nadine waltzed up to the time clock wearing a mischievous look. "Need a ride home, or do you want to vamp somebody on the bus tonight?" "I’ll take the ride." I was tired enough too put up with a couple of her digs if necessary. "Even willing to put some gas in your car for the trouble," I said.

"Guess you can afford it after today, huh Jackie?" She had given the wad of bills I stuffed into my purse a disbelieving look. "If you can pull tips like that, you should lobby Eileen to keep you on as one of her permanent waitresses."

"God," I moaned with a properly horrified expression, "Don’t say that out loud. You might give the boss ideas that I wouldn’t be able to deliver on."

"You never know! Besides, you did just fine today." Nadine lifted her coat out of her locker and moved her hair away from her neck before putting it on. When she finished buttoning up she looked at me inquisitively. "How about stopping off somewhere for quick after work drink? Kind of a farewell thing?" Maybe one," I answered looking at the clock. Lisa probably already had the kids. With Nadine driving me home I could afford an extra twenty minutes without making my wife mad. "One drink only, then I really have to get home. I’m dying to get out of these things and back to normal."

"Great!" Nadine turned to the others. "Hey everyone, Jackie’s coming! Party time," she announced enthusiastically. "Righteous, girl," said Carrie next to me fastening her own coat.

She had come as a very sexy female vampire and had been a big hit. Eileen waved cheerfully as we all left, but I could see her watching me with an odd, speculative look as we went out the door.

* * *

Two hours later, the light alcoholic euphoria I’d been under evaporated as I stared in shock at the inside of our house. No one was home and all the living room furniture was gone. I stood in the doorway in total disbelief until finally noticing the phone on the floor. The stand it had been on was also gone. There was a piece of paper under the phone. I walked over and picked it up. It was a note from Lisa.

‘Dear Jackie,’

I’ve had enough! There was no job interview today, I was moving. Don’t try to find me, I don’t want anything else from you. I’ve left the kid’s things, and a few clothes for you to use. Also the vacuum cleaner and kitchen stuff - since you use those more than I ever did. You can keep the stuff we had in the spare bedroom, too. I don’t really need it. I think it’s a fair split. Good luck with the girls. You always were more of a mother to them than I ever wanted to be. I’ll be in touch sometime.

Lisa’

Absolutely stunned I turned and walked into the Kitchen. The table and chairs, along with all our pots, pans, utensils, dishes, and tableware were still there. And true to her word, Lisa had left the furniture she had owned when we got married - a feminine four poster bed with canopy, vanity and bench, and several chests of drawers. All enameled in a shiny cream toned finish bordered with a floral applique.

All our other stuff, furniture wise, was gone, including the television, VCR, stereo, dining room set and our bedroom set. In our emptied out bedroom I found myself almost sick at what I found. The vindictive bitch had even taken all my clothes, up to and including my underwear. There was a stack of panties, bras, and other lingerie, along with several nightgowns and robes on the floor, with a note attached to the top of one pile of panties with a straight pin.

‘I was going to leave you with nothing at all, but then got to thinking about how cute you were this morning all done up like a working waitress. Anyway, since you’re such a great substitute Mommy for the girls, I thought you could wear these things. There’s a few little outfits in the closet that you can have, too.’

She had left pants, but only the ones with a back or side fastening. The tops she had left were all very feminine in cut and color. Adding insult to injury, all of her maternity clothes were carefully arranged on hangers, along with all the skirts and dresses I had purchased for her. She had left me about half of her shoes, too.

Numbly, I returned to the kitchen. I sat I tried to think of what I was going to do. The savings and checking account books were gone so I was pretty sure she’d emptied them. I had nothing left that had been mine. Thankfully she’d left the kid’s things. That made me finally think of the girls! Were they still at the neighbor’s?

Dazed, and still in my waitress uniform and woman’s coat, I made my way to Jennifer Collins’ place to retrieve my children. The children my wife didn’t care to stay with any longer. Jennifer was cautious when she opened the door.

"Yes?"

Jennifer was a couple years older than Lisa. She was actually quite nice but had little of the voluptuousness Lisa was blessed with. Her dark hair was always clean and in a fashion that complemented her face. As long as I had know her Jennifer had always wore nice conservative clothes that hung well on her.

As she examined me curiously I saw her eyes widen. "Jack?"

"Lisa has left me. Are the kids here?"

"Oh, . . . ah . . . yeah. Come inside."

She stepped back and let me enter. One thing I noticed, as I always did when I came over, her house smelled homey. The smell of cooked food lingered in the air as did the scent of a pine floor cleanser. I suspected one of my kids was responsible for that.

"I’ve put them down for naps. Let me go get them." She started towards the bedroom then turned back to me. "Have you had dinner yet?"

"I . . . ah . . ." My stomach growled loudly and suddenly I realized how hungry I was. I didn’t even know if Lisa had left any food in the house. "No, but I hate to put you out." A lie of sorts! I wasn’t sure if I had any emotions at the moment - I was too numb.

"Sit, Jack. The kids are sleeping and can wait. I think you need a sympathetic shoulder right now. And a good meal wouldn’t hurt."

I sat where she directed me and watched as she pulled out pans and dishes for my meal. I was in a stupor. How could Lisa have left me and the kids - like this? Why couldn’t she have had the decency to talk things out first?

"Jack?"

"What . . . oh! I’m sorry." My mind had been a million miles away.

"That’s okay. I understand," Jennifer said kindly. "How does a ham omelet, cottage cheese and fresh tomato slices sound."

"Anything, really. Ah . . . great!"

She turned back around and started puttering with different ingredients. There was something so comfortable about the scene that took me a while to realize what. It was something I’d never seen Lisa do.

"Would you like to talk about it?"

I looked at Jennifer in surprise. Why hadn’t I noticed how sympathetic she was before this?

"She told me she was going for a job interview. Instead she packed up and left me a kiss-off note." Just thinking about it was making me angry.

"Well, that explains the moving van! She came back after the van left and I was surprised she didn’t get the kids. I figured she was just stopping in for something she’d forgotten." "Oh, she grabbed a few things, all right," I answered with a rising note of anger and hurt in my voice. I launched into what I had found at the house.

"You poor thing," Jennifer said commiserating with me. Then her eyes widened as all of what I’d told her sunk in. "She didn’t even leave you any of your own clothes?"

"Not a stitch," I said shaking my head miserably. Then I almost moaned. "What am I going to do? Nothing’s open that I could get to by bus. I’ve got to go to work tomorrow."

"You went to work like that?"

When I looked up I saw Jennifer staring at my waitress’s uniform. Lisa hadn’t told her?

"It was my work costume for the restaurant’s Halloween costume tradition."

Jennifer was kind enough not to ask me the obvious, what did my costume have to do with Halloween? Suddenly I understood why Lisa had been so insistent.

She had deliberately set me up! The realization left a bitter taste in my mouth. As I looked at my costume something important came to mind - the breast forms. I needed to get them off. "Do you have any vinegar?" I asked.

"Vinegar?"

"Yeah. It works as a solvent for the glue holding these boobs and butt forms on." I felt myself blush again. Jennifer and I weren’t that close of friends.

"Are you sure you want to take them off?" she asked softly.

"What does that mean?"

Jennifer dropped her eyes and I saw her blush. After a moment she managed to look up and meet my eyes. "I don’t know how to say this Jack, but Lisa told me about your . . . " Jennifer’s courage failed and she ended by waving her hand in small circles. Lisa had told her what? Had Lisa told her before hand she was leaving? No, Jennifer wouldn’t have been a part of that besides she had been surprised when I had mentioned Lisa’s splitting. Had Lisa . . . then it hit me. Lisa had told her about my impotence.

"Great! What did she do, take out an add?"

"Ah, no, Jack. It wasn’t anything like that. It just sort of came up over coffee one morning." Jennifer looked apologetically at me. I slowly damped my anger. None of this was Jennifer’s fault. I watched as she walked to one of her cupboards and removed a bottle. "Will white vinegar work?" she asked holding out a bottle. "She just said vinegar." I hadn’t realized there was more than one type.

I spent the next five minutes in the bathroom slowly getting frustrated. No matter how liberally I coated my chest with the smelly stuff the breast forms remained as solidly bonded as ever. There wasn’t the slightest loosening at any of the edges as far as I could tell.

"Dinner, Jack," Jennifer called.

I wiped off, refastened the top of my uniform and reluctantly went into Jennifer’s kitchen.

"Woo! Eu de Vinegar! What’d you do, take a bath in it?" Jennifer asked. The way she was eyeing my bulging chest I could tell she was curious why the breast forms were still attached.

"Do you have another type of vinegar? This didn’t seem to work."

And so it was that after dinner I ended up lying on Jennifer’s kitchen table naked to the waist - breast forms protruding obscenely. Why hadn’t I noticed they even had their own nipples? And lying on the butt pads brought to my attention how much there was of them. They were very uncomfortable to lay on. "I’m going to try one more thing, Jack," Jennifer said. When her other bottle of vinegar (brown) hadn’t worked either, Jennifer had started experimenting. Now besides being obscene, my breast forms smelled of assorted household chemicals. Just what I needed ­ industrial cleaner smelling breasts! As Jennifer liberally applied her latest concoction I inhaled its odor and before I could stop myself a humungus sneeze wracked me. When my eyes opened I saw Jennifer looking up horror. My spasmodic contraction had kicked the plastic bowl containing her most recent brainstorm into the air and Jenny and I both watched helplessly as it plummeted down and struck the table. The bowls contents exploded outward like a tsunami and plastered the landscape ­ mostly Jenny. It soaked her, good, especially her breasts. Her stunned gasp and look of utter dismay gave me my first humorous moment of the day. She immediately ran for the sink.

"I’m praying for you!" I called out.

And I was. For her and for her real woman’s breasts because that foul smelling brew she had mixed up was bound to dissolve something!

When she had washed the concoction from herself as best possible she hurried to her bedroom and changed clothes leaving the drenched pieces soaking in her shower. I hoped they didn’t bleach or dissolve ­ I couldn’t afford to replace them. When she came back she handed me a wet wash cloth. I cleaned my own chest and then examined both breast forms. They were as solid as ever. Not so much as an air bubble. When I looked up my expression said it all.

"Well Jack, it looks like you’ve got breasts and a nice bubble butt for tomorrow!"

I gave Jennifer a disheartened look. What it really looked like was that Lisa had fucked me again.

"How are you going to go to work tomorrow?" asked Jennifer as she considered her own words.

Her question caused the pit to fall out of the bottom of my stomach. It was certainly too late to go anywhere by bus to find a solvent. And I could just see myself at an all night pharmacy trying to explain I needed a solvent to remove my boobs and phony bubble butt ­ even if they had such, which I was beginning to suspect they wouldn’t. The forms were obviously part of some vindictive trip Lisa was on and I was now certain, in my heart, that getting them off wasn’t going to be easy. I thought of not showing for up work tomorrow but with Lisa running off with all the money that wasn’t an option for the girls and I.

"I don’t know. I have to work tomorrow," I answered. "There’s no way now I can afford not to."

Jennifer was kind enough not to state the obvious. She let me work things out for myself. Until I got the breast forms off, it was safer to go to work as Jackie ­ unless Eileen fired me for not being Jack. And that would just about cap this entire nightmare. All I could hope for was that Eileen would be understanding when I explained Lisa had left me and vindictively taken all my clothes. Things were just getting better and better. Damn Lisa! I looked glumly at Jennifer.

"I hate to ask it, but I’ll need you to watch the kids all day tomorrow."

"That’s okay," she said with a little smile. "They’re sweet kids and you have enough to worry about just now. Why don’t you have another cup of coffee while I get the kids up and then I’ll come over with you to see if we can’t find something you can get by with for tomorrow, at least."

* * *

"Wow," Jennifer said shaking her head as she went through the clothing Lisa had left behind. "She really did leave you kind of stuck, didn’t she?"

"I never thought her this much of a bitch. She must be having a real good laugh over this wherever she’s hiding right now. Mad at me I can understand, but leaving her daughters?"

Jennifer looked at me strangely then went to the closet. After a few minutes she came back holding an ensemble of sorts. "I think this would work well with your uniform. You’d probably look real sexy in it," she said holding it against me. When she saw my unhappy expression she realized what she had said. "Sorry, Jack. But you do look fantastic in that getup. Just trying to lighten things up a little," Jennifer said contritely. "I’m sorry, really."

"It’s okay. I’ve been getting it all day long," I said wearily twitching at the apron of the uniform. I looked at my watch not aware of my limp wristed feminine gesture as I did so. "How about me making some coffee?" There’s nothing else to be done here for the time being, and I’d really appreciate the company if you don’t mind sticking around for a while. Lisa did leave all the kitchen stuff."

"Okay," Jennifer said nodding in agreement. She gave my still femininely attired form an amused look. "If you’d like to change, I’ll make the coffee."

"Why? I don’t have any male clothes and even if I did, these phony boobs would make things look worse then ever." We talked quietly over coffee and a frozen coffee-cake I’d put into the oven, and by the time we noticed what time it was, another hour had passed. Jennifer volunteered to watch the girls any time I needed to travel to get things done while I got on my feet. The conversation with Jennifer helped rid me of the worst part of my anger and had helped me to start looking forward again. Lisa had had her petty revenge, but she had left the best we had between us behind - the girls.

"It’ll be okay, Jack. You’ll see. Things are going to work out just fine," Jennifer said from the doorway.

After Jennifer left I checked on the girls. They were both asleep looking every bit the angels they were. The thing I was most concerned about was making sure there was food for them. Somehow we would make it. But I had few illusions. It would be awhile before I had enough money to replace the living room furniture or even the TV. I didn’t understand why she hadn’t left that for the girls. Caroline enjoyed watching Mr. Rogers. In the bathroom washing up it suddenly occurred to me that Jennifer had been talking to me, with me, as if I were a wife who had been left by her husband instead of the other way around. That made me feel very strange until I remembered the way I was still dressed, and how I had fussed over my girls, it was a mistake anyone could have made.

Just to cap off a perfect day, the curl did not come out of my hair when I washed it - neither did the color. And I couldn’t find anything that would remove the false fingernails. Plus, all the soaps and cleaning things Lisa had left were femininely scented and left my smooth shaven skin silky soft and shining like satin.

Mentally adding a haircut to the list of things I needed done, I clipped the nails at least short enough to be a man’s, though they were still bright red since I couldn’t find any polish remover either. Thanks, Lisa!

I turned off the lights, passed through the empty bedroom I’d shared with my wife - until last night, and made my way to the spare room after checking on the girls one last time. Overtly feminine or not, at least there was a bed with clean sheets and a comforter. I did draw the line at wearing one of the nighties though. The pair of panties I had to pull on after my shower was bad enough.

And in bed I found yet another part of Lisa’s vindictiveness. The breast forms made it impossible to sleep on my stomach and the butt forms made it impossible to sleep on my back! And in bed all alone and relaxed, the glued on forms felt like someone holding parts of my body. It was a disturbing sensation and one that was hard to ignore. And when, in a partly dreamy sleep-state, I’d found my hands holding my boobs suggestively, I blushed for the hundredth time that day and slept the rest of the night with my hands stiffly at my sides.

* * *

Next morning arrived and with it chaos. For a moment, the weight of the forms on my chest and butt left me disoriented and confused until I remembered. And worse, with no one to help with the feeding and cleaning of the girls, I found my own schedule totally asunder. And when I finally did get dressed, I decided to forgo the constraining girdle and was chagrinned to find that the girdle was necessary because otherwise I had a very unfeminine bulge between my legs. So I had to undress and start over. Damn!

I ended up wearing a pair of tan cotton pants - that just did fit over my butt, brown loafers, a white long sleeved blouse, tan double breasted jacket, and with a thick black silk scarf. I managed to work the scarf into a semblance of a man’s tie. When I finally examined myself in the mirror, I sighed in frustration. Because Lisa was slightly taller than I was, the clothes hung poorly, yet all my work at trying to appear more masculine was unmistakably undone by the breast forms, the plucked eyebrows, and the bouncy blonde curls. And I hadn’t even added lipstick. Realizing further trying was futile, I picked up the girls and headed for Jennifer’s. On the way over I was very conscious of the panties, the thin nylon socks and the cotton camisole top I had on. Since it was cold outside I had needed a coat. Which meant either the obviously feminine blue one I’d worn the previous day, or a lined trench-style raincoat. I opted for the raincoat.

The overall picture I presented, especially with me carrying the previous day’s uniform on a hanger and covered with a plastic garment bag, was that of a young woman with pretty curled hair who was trying hard to look business-like by going without makeup. If I hadn’t needed the job so badly now I would have called in sick.

"She permed your hair?"

Each time something came up I felt more and more like a fool. Lisa had done a real number on me and I had gone blithely along. I tried to hastily explain to Jennifer but by her expression I knew I was just digging a deeper hole for myself. How could anyone believe I’d been so naive?

"Would you like to borrow some polish remover?" Jennifer asked. "If you have any," I said unhappily. "But I’ll have to take it to work with me. The bus is due and I just barely have time to get to the stop from here."

Jennifer herded the girls inside and was back in a quick breath with a bottle of polish remover. She gave me another wide-eyed look as she handed it to me.

"I hate to tell you, but you still look more like a Jill than a Jack."

"It was Jackie, yesterday," I groused accepting the polish remover gratefully. "And there isn’t much I can do about it until I get these boobs off. I need the job and will be in a lot of trouble if I don’t show up today. The boss heard me accept an invitation to go out for some drinks last night after work with the girls."

"Well, good luck," Jennifer said. "One look and just about anyone might decide you’d really tied one on, anyway. I hope things go okay for you today."

Looked like I’d tied one on? What did that mean? I was confused enough to wonder if I should have been upset.

* * *

The same bus driver gave me a raised eyebrow. "Tough night last night, sweety?" Before I could say anything she grinned at me.

"But you still look good! I think I’m jealous."

"Ah, thanks," I mumbled.

I gave her a quiet smile in return and worked my way back to find a place to sit. This time, I politely declined an offer of a seat and instead worried about how Eileen, Nadine, Leta, and all the others would take my appearance when they saw me. That and how long it was going to take my eyebrows to grow out.

* * *

"Well, well, Jackie." Nadine had arrived as I waited for Eileen to unlock the front door. She was smiling nastily. "Looks like we forgot to wear our makeup, today. Didn’t we!" "It isn’t what you think," I said making a vague wave at myself.

"Lisa left me yesterday and . . . "

"We’re sorry for that Jack," Nadine said as she interrupted with a contemptuous smile, "but since you can’t use Lisa any more to hide behind, you should at least be honest with us. We all know it’s what you really want anyway."

"Huh?"

I stared at her about as intelligently as the answer to her last comment had come out. I knew Nadine could be bitchy but this was beyond even her.

"Lisa told all of us about how you like to dress up and play ‘Mommy’ at home, Jackie dear."

Speechless I stared at Nadine. Whatever was going on seemed to be pleasing to her. I glanced at Eileen who was watching the exchanged. She didn’t seem surprised or angry. "It’s okay wanting to be a girl, Jackie. Yesterday the rest of us finally got to see you en femme. It seemed to bring out the real you, didn’t it?" Nadine said smugly.

I was still staring dumbly at Nadine when Eileen opened the door and walked inside. Was this ‘Nadine being malicious’ or another thing Lisa had done to me? I swallowed and hurried after Eileen. "That isn’t true, Eileen," I said when I reached her. Nadine had followed on my heels and now stood beside me. She snorted in disbelief.

"I can explain," I said motioning towards my clothes, "really."

"I, for one," Eileen said with hands on hips while looking me over from head to toe, "really don’t care, Jackie, as long as you do your work and don’t embarrass the restaurant. If you feel it necessary to give me a story, I’ll listen, honey."

"Why would I make up such a stupid story?"

"So you’re finally admitting it’s just a story," Nadine said, snickering.

I whirled towards Nadine. My face was red and as I stared angrily at her I realized I no longer needed to be concerned about Lisa getting mad at me for not getting along with her friend.

"You wouldn’t know the truth if you slept with it!"

"That’s enough," Eileen said quickly. "I’m not having a cat fight in my restaurant. If you two can’t get along, one or both of you will have to go."

She looked from one of us to the other until she was certain we had both gotten the message. She looked at the uniform I was holding. "Put that in your locker for now. I’ll let you know what to do with it later."

Nadine and I walked down the hallway in silence then took turns clocking in. She was angry but not foolish enough to buck Eileen. My shot had hit home ­ she had a bit of a reputation for sleeping around. It was obvious she hadn’t expected me to defend myself. That wasn’t all that surprising, I never had before. Eileen had me start on yesterday’s receipts. It had been a good day, a real good day. Somewhere after the initial morning rush Eileen came back to the office to see how I was doing. I took that opportunity to tell her about Lisa and some of the things she had done. What disturbed me most was that throughout my entire story I kept getting the feeling Eileen didn’t totally believe everything I was telling her.

"I swear, no matter what my wife told Nadine, I have never dressed like a woman until yesterday."

There was that look again.

"Jackie, I’m sorry about you and Lisa but you have to understand that I really don’t care if you have or haven’t. If you do your job and don’t make waves, we’ll get along."

"But . . ."

Eileen’s upraised hand stopped me. "Take over the counter for Nadine. She’s due a break."

"Like this?"

"No, Jackie, in uniform. And with proper makeup! Same as for any of my other girls."

"But . . ."

"I don’t want to hear it, Jackie. I’m trying to be nice here because of Lisa leaving you and the girls, but don’t push me. You come in as female - you perform the same as any of my other girls. That clear?"

"Yes."

I felt my face burn with embarrassment. I stood and headed for the employee’s lounge. The situation was becoming maddening but I could appreciate Eileen’s position and I had to have the job.

The girls and I couldn’t afford me having days off looking for work right now. Perhaps in a month or two! And I would have to get these damn breasts off first. I started to walk out of the office to get changed when I remembered. "I don’t have any makeup."

She gave me that look again.

"Try your locker. I thought I saw some when you were hanging your coat up."

I started to object but stopped when I saw her expression. I walked out, went down the hall into the employee’s lounge, opened my locker and nearly fainted. There on the shelf was a makeup kit. "My, don’t we look nice," Nadine said snidely when I relieved her at the counter.

"You’re on break," I said ignoring her jab. It had taken three attempts before my lipstick had looked even halfway decent. The day quickly proved much worse than yesterday. The other employees watched me with looks ranging from complete sympathy to Nadine’s offensive smirking. My nipples itched off and on, the skin on my butt kept getting pulled and stretched so much that I tried to rub it against surfaces, to no avail. What was worse, my emotional upset communicated itself to the customers so I hardly got any tips. And every time I unconsciously performed a feminine action, wiggled my butt, posed with my chest out or gave a limp wrist to someone, Nadine was there to point it out to one and all. It made my embarrassment almost complete and left little doubt that I was actually swishing - as Nadine called it. She is such a catty bitch. And she’s slightly overweight too. After the worst of lunch traffic was over, I headed for the office to make a few personal calls ­ with Eileen’s permission. The first was to the bank. Things were worse than I’d first thought. Lisa had cleaned out our joint account five days earlier which meant that all the bills paid by check on the first of the month weren’t going to get paid and my rent check had bounced already according to the bank. The bank branch manager was sympathetic when hearing my story, or at least sympathetic about the part regarding my wife leaving; however, she couldn’t do anything to help.

"What a bitch! Go ahead and take a break, Jackie." Eileen had heard the last of my call.

Back in the employee lounge, Nadine and Leta were having a cup of coffee. Nadine was obviously waiting for me since she looked up with a hesitant smile. "Hey, Jack, I’m sorry about earlier. I guess seeing you en femme today and hearing you trying to brush it with an excuse sort of set me off. You know we’re really your friends and would like to help. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be a mommy. Your girls are so delightful and they certainly need someone to mommy them."

"I wasn’t ‘brushing’ things off with an excuse," I said.

Nadine’s false solicitousness set my back up.

"Sure, Jack! But you have to understand Lisa told us more than once you wanted to be a female so badly that you’d already changed your drivers license."

"What a crock! And you’d believe a woman who ran off from her own children."

A look of anger flashed across Nadine’s face at my less than flattering description of Lisa. "Jack, if it’s such a crock, show us your driver’s license," she demanded.

"You’re being silly."

"Then show us," Nadine demanded including Leta in the conversation with a sweep of her arm. Eileen had just walked in and by her expression I knew she had caught most of the last exchange.

Grumbling, I got up, went to my locker and withdrew my wallet from my purse. After some fumbling I withdrew my drivers license and found myself dumbfounded. The picture was me en femme in an outfit I didn’t recognize and the name was Jacquelyn Ann Pierce - female. It wasn’t possible! I quickly looked through the rest of my wallet.

Every piece of male identification I’d had was gone. "A crock, huh, Jackie?" Nadine had picked up my drivers license and after a brief inspection had handed it to Leta.

"I . . . I don’t understand!"

And I didn’t. I flipped through the rest of the female wallet and found myself stunned. There was a social security number, different from my own with the name Jacquelyn Ann Pierce, a grocery store shopping card in Jacquelyn Ann’s name, and even a library and credit card in her name. It wasn’t possible! Shortly after that Nadine’s break ended. Leta left also and as she did she gave me a strange look - partially of disgust.

"Jack, I’d like to see you in my office for a few moments."

I put my stuff away and in a daze headed for Eileen’s office. How Had Lisa gotten a picture of me on a drivers license wearing an outfit I’d never seen before? How had she even got the license?Was it a real license? It couldn’t be.

"All right, Jack," Eileen said giving me a thin smile and pointing at a chair for me to sit in, "we need to talk."

I nodded numbly. What was I going to do if she fired me? For the first time I was really scared because on the way to Eileen’s office I had thought of something else. That bitch Lisa had probably maxed the credit card I’d found and left you know who holding the bag.

"What are your plans?" she asked watching my face carefully.

"My plans?"

"You know, about working here. Is it going to be Jack or Jackie?"

I felt myself blush beet red ­ all the way to the souls of my feet. Lisa had really done a job on me. She had all of my coworkers doubting my masculinity. I knew she could be a bitch at times but never had I suspected she could be this vindictive. I found myself actually glad she was gone ­ progress of sorts.

"I know what things look like Eileen, but I’m not that way. Really!"

She looked at me oddly then glanced down as if choosing her words with care. "Jack, if you want to come in as Jackie, as one of my waitresses, its okay with me and the other girls."

Utter humiliation pierced me. Was there no way to keep from being tainted by Lisa’s lying? My face was strained when I again met Eileen’s eyes. And then I felt even worse, I could tell Eileen was only trying to be helpful.

"I’m a male, Eileen. I enjoy being a male and dressing as a male, regardless of how things look at the moment."

"And I’m not suggesting otherwise, Jack, but you should think about it. That’s all I’m saying. You were so good at the job it’d be a shame to let that wonderful talent waste away. Especially the way you pulled in the tips. And though I’d like to help you and the girls after what Lisa did, I can’t afford to pay you more money."

"I understand."

"I’m not sure you really do, Jack," she said exhaling loudly. Her face was set in an emotion I hadn’t seen before. My stomach did a small flip. "I really don’t want to fire you, but you’re putting me in a bad spot." She held up her hand stopping my interruption. When she had my silence assured she picked up a pencil and slapped it lightly against her other hand.

"My problem is not you wanting to be a girl or not wanting to be a girl, my problem is my customers. If they ID you alternating between Jack and Jackie, it might drive me out of business. This is still by and large a conservative town."

She abruptly held up her hand waiving off the start of another explanation by me. When she wanted, Eileen could be quite forceful.

"I can’t take that risk, Jack, and its not fair of you to ask me to," she said pointedly. Her eyes narrowed. "So here’s the deal. You take the rest of the day off and all day tomorrow and try to get a little order in your life. But however you come dressed on Monday, Jack or Jackie, that’s how you dress from then on.

No changes! And if you come in as Jackie on Monday, no more sorry performances like today. Your makeup was terrible and your attitude lousy. And the thing is Jackie, my girls making lots of tips is good for me because that means the customers are happy. That sorry performance of yours today cost you and will cost me business because some of those old boys that wanted a smile from you are certain to take their business elsewhere."

I sat numbly in the chair. I could feel the blood rushing to my face. Considering the glue on the boobs and how my eyebrows and hair looked, it was going to take lots of work just to get me masculine looking enough to come to work as Jack on Monday - let alone doing interviewing anywhere else. Now I had a real urgency to find the right solvent, fake bushy eyebrows and some male clothes ­ and all with little or no money. Otherwise I was going to be Jackie at work until I managed to find another job. I nodded glumly and stood. Minutes later, as I was leaving the restaurant, Nadine called out to me. I ignored her. I’d had enough of Nadine for the day.

* * *

The first thing I did at home was phone the credit card company. My worst fears were realized. Lisa had charged $4600 on its $5000 limit. Without realizing even what I was doing I went to Jennifer’s and when she opened the door, I went into her kitchen, put my head on the table and broke out in tears. She let me cry it out of my system.

"Here, Jack," she said holding a glass of water and a pill out towards me.

I wiped a teary eye. "What is it?"

"A tranquilizer. You need it. Give it a few moments then we’ll talk about things."

I swallowed the pill and the milk and the slice of cake that followed. Why couldn’t Lisa have been more like Jennifer? Soon I was unburdening my woes about my unconscious swishing, the female license and ID, the credit card and lastly, Eileen’s ultimatum.

"Do you want to tell me why you didn’t take off the nail polish before you left work today?" Jennifer asked picking up one of my hands and examining it.

"I don’t know." That was my very honest and puzzled answer. "I guess it just didn’t seem to be worth the effort with the way people had been reacting before Nadine got to me."

I saw her look of disbelief and leaned my head into my hands in frustrated misery. I didn’t want Jennifer to doubt me also. "I just don’t know, Jenny. This whole girl thing has thrown me for a loop. I can’t believe what has been happening."

"You do seem to carry it off well," she agreed thoughtfully. "Quite naturally and unselfconsciously, in fact. I noticed that last night when I answered the door and didn’t recognize you. I thought it was really some young woman at my door, Jack. Are you sure you’ve never done something like this before?" "Yes," I said even more miserable because of her question and its implications. I actually felt the hot wetness of tears in my eyes once again and fought to hold them back so I wouldn’t embarrass myself any more.

"I’m sure. A guy my size and build has to be really careful about things like that or people reach conclusions that aren’t all that nice about him."

"Well, you’re sure acting like a distraught female," she said calmly. "And you aren’t sitting in that chair like a guy would either."

"Maybe it’s the clothes," I said hopefully reaching for some type of explanation. "They make me look more feminine, maybe people just take that and see what they want to."

"People do see what they expect most of the time," Jennifer said, "but you’re also acting in a way that encourages them to think you’re a female. Look at how you’re sitting there with both hands wrapped around your cup, back straight, knees together, feet flat on the floor, and all that. It’s a classic feminine posture for sitting, Jack, and you assumed it right away when you sat down."

"I didn’t notice," I said. I moved a little. Crossing my legs mannishly was more uncomfortable than I wanted to admit just then. "My body just kind of went that way without conscious direction."

"Well, you’re doing it again," she said pointing at my knees. I had uncrossed my legs and pressed my knees primly back together. "And you looked really uncomfortable when you leaned back and crossed your legs. Try crossing them girl style," she suggested. "See if that way is comfortable for you."

I did, it was! I began to worry. Something in the back of my mind began clamoring for attention but I couldn’t bring it into focus. Whatever it was seemed to slide away from all scrutiny I tried giving it.

A wail from the next room interrupted our conversation. With a feeling that was almost relief, I stood and headed out of the kitchen to retrieve little Katie. She had awakened from her nap and was announcing that she was hungry.

"Have you always been so good with the girls?" Jennifer had followed then helped me change Katie and a sleepy Caroline who had been awakened by her sister. When done we each picked one of the girls up and returned to the kitchen. "I mean you really look content when you’re taking care of them, even when you have to clean and change them. Most fathers will do that these days, but none I’ve ever watched seem all that happy about doing it."

"They’re my daughters."

I had answered without rancor while heating a bottle of formula for Katie. I tested its heat against my forearm by squirting a little out then turned Katie and fed her the nipple. She immediately stopped her squirming and attacked the bottle voraciously.

"Lisa never did care much for taking care of them, so I tried to make up the difference whenever I was around." "You do a really good job of it," Jennifer said watching as I cooed to the one-year-old and let her have the waiting nipple. I carefully held the bottle at an angle to reduce air being taken in with the formula. "I’ve watched a lot of women who can’t handle a baby so well."

"Like I said, I’ve had lots of practice. Lisa was one of those women who couldn’t seem to get the hang of it, or didn’t care to get the hang of it."

Caroline had curled up in my neighbor’s lap and was sleeping again. I gave them both a soft smile.

"You sure do look like a doting mommy right now," Jennifer said appreciatively. Then she got a thoughtful look on her face. "Which brings me back around to what I was kind of driving at before your little darlings woke up. Did you let Lisa do anything else to help out with your costume?" she asked. "Like what?" I asked cradling my daughter in the crook of one arm while carefully feeding her.

"You know, like something that would help you act more feminine or at least seem more comfortable in women’s clothes?" "Not that I can think of." That nagging itch was back. Was there something else? I couldn’t get past the feeling that my mind was trying to tell me something I couldn’t quite remember. I thought of one thing, but it couldn’t be related. "We visited a friend of hers every two weeks for a number of months before Halloween. Her friend is a therapist who uses hypnosis to help people quit smoking and things like that. Lisa wanted to quit the habit and talked me into driving and keeping her company during the rides out and back."

Jennifer’s eyes widened.

"No," I said quickly. "Before you ask, I never let Alyse hypnotize me. I never picked up smoking as a habit, nor had anything else I wanted to change about myself. I didn’t even let her do it in fun, like she suggested when we first met her." "Are you sure?" Jennifer asked. "Did you ever fall asleep when you were at this Alyse’s with you wife?"

"Oh, I dozed off a couple of times," I said. "A lot of the visits Lisa made were after I’d gotten off work on some really long days and I was kind of tired. I’d take a short nap when they were in Alyse’s office getting Lisa unhooked."

Jennifer looked at me thoughtfully and nodded slowly. "Did you ever drink anything while you were over there?" "Maybe a beer, or something non-alcoholic if I was really tired. Come on, Jenny, I wasn’t hypnotized. That sort of thing doesn’t work if the subject doesn’t want it to."

"Maybe, but it could be an explanation for the way you’ve changed in the last couple of months."

With that Jennifer adjusted Caroline’s position, carefully rose and went to the sink counter to get herself another cup of coffee.

"There’s a woman at your house. I think I saw her earlier."

I jumped up disturbing Katie in the process and quickly ran to the window. "Its Nadine," I said after a moment.

"Lisa’s friend?"

I nodded. Jennifer looked at me inquisitively. I shrugged.

"I don’t know what she wants. Whatever it is, it can wait. She was the proverbial bitch today!"

Jennifer took a last look at Nadine then we both returned to the kitchen table. "Were you so ‘motherly’ towards the girls before you and Lisa met this Alyse? Or so happy to pick up the slack with the housework and cooking when Lisa left it?" she asked. Jennifer’s insistence at returning to this subject dredged up the unease I had tried earlier to bury. I had begun worrying about that odd sense of something important at the back of my mind. Something about the every two-week visits that no matter how hard I tried to focus, I couldn’t quite remember. All I was doing was giving myself a headache.

"No, I don’t think I was, but that doesn’t mean anything. Somebody had to do that stuff, especially when Katherine started crawling around."

Jennifer looked at me searchingly then stirred her coffee. She picked up her cup and as she drank she continued to examine me over the rim of the cup.

"Would you be willing to have someone else put you under to find out for sure?" she asked finally.

"I suppose." I was agreeing mainly to get her off the subject. I set a towel over my shoulder and patted Katie’s back. I laughed when she burped loudly. "But it’s going to have to wait until I can get other things straightened out."

"You’re avoiding the issue here," she said.

Was I?

"Jennifer, it’s not as if I don’t have some very heavy issues to deal with here. I’ve got some things that have to absolutely be done tomorrow just for me to go to work Monday."

"Sorry, Jack. But at least think about it, won’t you."

* * *

The first thing I did after returning home was to call the landlord and explain. He was sympathetic about Lisa’s leaving, and aboutthe bank accounts being cleaned out, but when he found out my check was going to bounce he was not happy. I had been late a few times in the past because of the job upheavals so the best I could wangle was a promise that he wouldn’t throw us out right away - but he was going to raise the rent! None of my pleading had any effect. I didn’t know if I could afford the higher rent. The doorbell sounded. I looked at my pink watch - it was past ten. I couldn’t believe someone was calling this late.

"Hi, Nadine."

"Aren’t you going to invite me in?"

I stood back and let her enter ­ curious. Inside she looked me up and down and I waited for the smart-ass comment. Normally Nadine wasn’t too bad but today she had been a grade A bitch. "I know things are tough for you and the girls right now, Jack.

I’d like to help," she said.

Of all the things I might have expected from Nadine, this wasn’t it. When I didn’t say anything she continued.

"When I got home today, there was a card in my mail from Lisa. She said she had left some necessary items for you at Naileghs and Finster. I’m off tomorrow so I’ll drive you there and anywhere else you need to go afterwards, if you’d like."

Lisa! My initial spike of anger flattened out and I remained amazingly calm - thank heavens for Jennifer’s tranquilizer. Left necessary items for me? At a lawyers office! As I thought about the possibilities, outside of divorce papers that would be served on me, the reason to go was just what Nadine had said, important items I needed (my male ID). Hopefully, they would have all of them. There certainly wouldn’t be any money. I could also give them the credit card and make the demand that Lisa take care of it. At least they’d know how to get in touch with her.

I became aware that Nadine was still waiting for an answer. Her driving me around would be a big help. I could add a lot more things to my ‘to do’ list, a haircut to get rid of my blonde curls being one that had moved much closer to the top after my conversation with Eileen.

"Okay, and thanks, Nadine!"

Nadine smiled in relief and left.

* * *

That night, I was plagued with very strange dreams - dreams so clear they were almost like memories. In one of them, I was seated in Alyse’s study with my wife in the background. Alyse was speaking to me in an even soft voiced monotone. My posture in that dream was very demure and feminine. My knees and ankles were together, my hands were clasped in my lap and my feet were flat on the floor. And as Alyse droned on and on my skin started reacting negatively to my male clothing. I had the strongest conviction that I would be much more comfortable attired in a dress.

In another, I was cheerfully, and quite contentedly, waiting tables at Eileen’s Place. I was feeling wonderfully cute and sexy in my uniform and was greatly enjoying flirting with all the male customers - much to a watching Nadine’s amused delight. Some of my other dreams involved doing housework, in ridiculously old fashioned, fifties style dresses, and caring for the girls. The outfits were complete with high heels and a pearl choker. All of those dreams, except the first, were filled with feelings of warm contentment and happiness.

* * *

Katherine woke at five thirty the next morning and lustily demanded to be both changed and fed. I performed both chores in the half-wakeful daze most parents of very young children are all too familiar with. To save as much as possible on utility bills I’d turned the thermostat as far down as I thought safe for the girls so the house had cooled significantly.

I ended up sleeping in one of the flannel nightgowns Lisa had left behind. The one I was chose was a knee length lavender confection, with lace trimmed short sleeves, scooped neckline and a white ribbon running around its empire waist. When I got up for Katherine I pulled on a quilted robe of shimmering pink satin and slid my feet into matching slippers to protect them from the cold floors.

Katherine’s cries woke Caroline. Knowing I was up for the day, I turned up the heat, started breakfast and, for some reason, just forgot about what I was wearing. Minutes later I sat in the kitchen and nursed several cups of coffee while I enjoyed a light breakfast of sweet rolls and sliced fruit.

After that, I got the girls dressed. Caroline in a darling yellow romper and long sleeved shirt, and Katherine in a bright pink outfit with teddy bears embroidered on the bib of her long pants. They looked so cute!

I combed Katherine’s hair and pinned it with barrettes. When I turned to start on Caroline’s I heard something hit the floor. It was one of Katie’s barrettes. She had yanked it out. "Hey, you," I said.

"Maah!" It was her emphatic agreement, question, and denial all in one. It was also the only word she knew. Then she promptly pulled another of the barrettes loose and held it out for my inspection and approval. Which started our little game of tag with the hairbrush all over again. Next came Caroline’s. Once I’d gotten Caroline’s hair finished, and convinced her to leave it as I’d fixed it by telling her over and over again how pretty she was that way, I started her breakfast. Before I could finish Katherine was calling for attention again. Which meant another changing and feeding.

"You little dear," I cooed to her while keeping one eye on what her sister might be up to. I was fully prepared to reach behind me to keep Caroline from anything that might be harmful. "And your sister seems determined to wear me out before the day’s even gotten going properly here. How about giving me a break, sweetie? I still need to finish getting myself cleaned up and dressed, you know."

Katherine burbled a drooly giggle, while Caroline found the hem of my nightgown and was industriously tugging at the lace on it. At least I knew for sure what she was up to. At that great life moment the front door chimes insistently announced a visitor.

"Just a minute."

Holding Katie and juggling her bottle and with Caroline still clutching the hem of the nightgown I was wearing, I made my way slowly to the front door. Caroline, like a small caboose, was determined not to let go of my nightgown. At the front door I found a bemused Nadine waiting. I hadn’t realized it was that late, with one thing and another. The cold air on my bare legs reminded me I hadn’t gotten out of the nightgown, robe, or slippers yet.

"Well, good morning, beautiful. And you too, snookums," said Nadine tickling Katherine under the chin. Nadine looked me over and grinned ear to ear. "Have you little darling’s been wearing Mommy to a frazzle this morning?"

"Come in, Nadine," I replied carefully stepping to the side. I towed my oldest daughter in my wake as if she were a dinghy tied to a larger boat or ship. "And yes, they have been a handful this morning."

"You poor thing," said Nadine looking at me. I’d have enjoyed her sympathy a whole lot more if she hadn’t grinned so incessantly.

Nadine was wearing jeans,a bright red sweater and hot black leather boots with tassels. As always her makeup was complete and not a strand of hair on her head was out of place. She was a natty dresser - but still slightly overweight! Nadine closed the door behind her and followed me into the kitchen. I sat Katherine in the high chair and begin combing out Caroline’s hair - for a last time hopefully.

"In spite of everything you seem to be coping. And you’ve got that ‘Mommy in the Morning Look’ down perfectly. I’ve got to say, those clothes are you." Nadine giggled at her own cleverness and I couldn’t blame her. I had to look a fright. "Really, all you need to complete the picture is curlers in your hair and green goop all over your face," she said.

"Funny, Nadine. Ha, Ha." I was grousing at her but it wasn’t Nadine’s fault and after all she was here helping. I handed a contented Katherine to her. "Here, would you mind watching this little alarm clock while I change?"

"Not in the slightest, but I’d like your agreement on one thing first. Every time Lisa was angry with you, she’d bend my ear incessantly, which was boring as hell. You undoubtedly are angry with Lisa, but I’m not her. Please don’t take your anger out on me. Okay?"

I exhaled noisily. I had never considered that Nadine might be caught in a middle she didn’t want to be in.

"Agreed," I said.

With that decided Nadine took Katie and cooed into her face.

"Hi there, honey. Don’t fuss. Mommy will be back pretty soon. You’ll be good for Aunt Nadine while she’s gone, won’t you sweetie?"

I ignored Nadine’s comments and picked up Caroline so I could walk at a normal pace. I shushed Caroline’s howls of protest by placing her little hands on the lace at the bodice of the gown which, for some reason, wasn’t nearly so interesting to her as that around the hem.

This time I dressed in the girdle. I had learned my lesson yesterday. I selected a pair of blue linen pants, with an embarrassingly infuriating back zip, then chose a white pullover long sleeved sweater so I could cover that fact. When I got the sweater pulled down and saw myself in the mirror I blushed. My boobs had pushed the front of the sweater out so far that every male I passed was sure to get whip-lash. And worse, without a bra, the sweater’s tightness obscenely displayed my artificial nipples. I was every teen male’s ideal sweater girl. Wonderful!

How could I have forgotten about my boobs and bubble butt? And how could I have forgotten that I was going to have to go out dressed as Jackie. The thought of me showing up at the offices of Naileghs and Finster as Jackie and asking for the items Lisa had left for her husband Jack was terrifying. Damn Lisa. I thought of not going or waiting until after I got the boobs off but rejected the idea. I needed my ID! Besides work Monday, I couldn’t access any of my accounts or open any new bank accounts as jack until I got my ID back. And with no checks, there was no way to use any of the existing accounts ­ not that I would want to anyway. Lisa had really handed me a mess.

Naileghs and Finster weren’t open this afternoon or Sunday and without Nadine’s car, I had no way to get to them during the week. And I definitely couldn’t afford a cab. Aware of the humiliation I was about to endure, my face flushed bright red as I finished dressing.

* * *

"You’re Mr. Pierce? Really?"

His derisive grin raked along the entire length of my spine. From the moment Nadine and I had walked in, I had felt myself under humiliating scrutiny. I was certain they had been aware of my identity long before I had announced it. And when I had identified myself as Mr. Pierce, it had been sly smirks all around. It was bad enough that I looked as feminine as Nadine did, if not a little bit more.

"Yes, she’s really him!"

Thanks Nadine! The only thing Nadine didn’t do was pop bubbles with her gum. I tried ignoring the jabs but knew my face had to be flushed from embarrassment. And it wasn’t as if they were a top flight legal firm either.

Looking at the decor and matching receptionist, it was easy to peg the firm of Naileghs and Finster as a personal corporation of legal sleazes.

"Well in that case ‘MR.’ Pierce, won’t you please follow me."

I had to clamp my jaw shut to keep from retorting. He had chuckled in amusement when he said ‘Mr.’. I seriously doubt he could have been more insulting if he had tried. Despite all my efforts I was blushing.

"Not you, Miss," he said to Nadine. "We have a letter you’re to examine alone."

Nadine and I looked at one another. She shrugged and followed the receptionist into another office. The lawyer motioned to me and then turned and walked back to what I assumed was his office. Once inside he went behind his desk and indicated a seat for me to take for myself.

"I’m afraid I don’t know what someone like you likes to drink, but if you have some preference I’ll do my best to get it for you."

"Could we just get on with it?"

My humiliation was bordering on rage. Having to endure crudity and sexual innuendoes was far beyond what I had expected - even at the worst. Lisa had done herself proud in choosing Bozo and Bozo!

"Right then," he said.

He smile said he was pleased with himself. After a brief hesitation, he reached into his lower drawer and pulled out two large envelopes. He let me see both of them. One had my name on it; the other was addressed to the states Social Services Division.

"Mr. Pierce, . . . or, do you prefer Jackie?"

I had to count to ten. His manner was infuriating but the two envelopes, especially the one addressed to the state, were giving me bad feelings.

"Jack is fine."

"Right!"

He tamped the two envelopes once on the surface of his desk then put one face down directly in front of him and held the other nearer me. The one he was holding was the one addressed to me. He managed to get rid of most of his grin before looking up.

"Jack, we have been retained by your wife on a very simple matter. We were given three envelopes, these two and one for the woman you came in with. Our instructions are quite simple. We give you and the young lady your respective envelopes. Then, depending on your reaction, we either mail this letter my firm is holding, or we put it in our safe for the next year coincident with certain conditions occurring. If all the coincident conditions have occurred throughout the coming year, then a year from now we turn our envelope, unopened, over to you. And for your information, we have not been made privy to the contents of any of the envelopes. Is that clear Mr. . . . ah, Jack?"

His smile was so oily I could have lubed the car I no longer had with it. My stomach was doing flip-flops. Oily’s instructions didn’t seem to have anything to do with my missing ID and I didn’t trust Lisa. Her threatening to mail something to the state couldn’t be good news.

"Yes," I said swallowing.

With that he handed me the envelope and watched as I tore it open.

‘Jack,

I’m sorry about having to write the letter to social services, but your continuing deviant sexual behavior has frightened me. Perhaps if you hadn’t sexually molested the girls ­ yes there is a sworn affidavit to that fact in the letter to the state about that. And I could even accept, no not accept ­ overlook perhaps, your beating me with your fists when you became impotent.’

I stopped reading. I was in shock. I had never touched Lisa in anger, ever! And she knew that. Talk about being vindictive, how could she even suggest I had molested the girls. I sat there trembling. Had Lisa been in the room I might have physically attacked her I was so angry.

"Please read all of the letter before giving your answer," said Oily.

I looked up. There was no smirk, but there was concern - the letter was crackling from the trembling of my hand. He might be oblivious of the letters content, but he couldn’t miss the stress it had produced. Without a word I dropped my eyes back to Lisa’s letter and tried to continue.

‘I know deep-down you love the girls but your inability to come to grips with your deep-rooted desires threatens them. But I want to be fair. I think if you could get around your hang up, you could be a good parent. So here’s the deal I’m offering. You go see a transgender specialist, get yourself on female hormones, and for the next year live as a woman. If you do this successfully for one year, the letter to the state and the girls are both yours. You see, I am that certain that if you live totally as a woman and let all your hidden desires come out openly for all your friends to see, you will be able to come to grips with your wanting to be the Mommy. So its really simple, Jackie. If you want the girls, you live openly as their mommy and take more of the girly pills you didn’t know I knew you were sneaking. Only if you’re going to do this, for the benefit of the girls, and yours too Jackie, I want it done under medical supervision.

If you can’t bring yourself to do this, then I want the girls taken from you and adopted out. For their safety as well as yours! So its that simple. Go to the doctor, get approved girly pills, and let Nadine teach you how to be the girl you really want to be, or let the girls be adopted out.

Just so you know there won’t be any backsliding, Nadine has to submit a weekly report to the lawyer’s office. The first week it doesn’t show up, or says that you didn’t comply, the letter to the state goes out and you lose the girls. My advice - learn to be nice to Nadine.

Lisa.

P.S. The thought of you growing your own titties is delicious after the way you twisted mine so meanly when I was nursing. It hurts sometimes you know!’

My face flared red-hot. She even ended with a lie. Lisa had refused to breast-feed either child. Far too maternal for her and she didn’t want to risk ‘the brats’ stretching her nipples. "This is a pack of lies," I said shaking the letter at oily.

"Mrs. . . . er . . . ah, Jack. One of the coincident conditions is that no one learn the contents of that letter. If someone does, we have no recourse but to mail this last letter now in our possession ­ as failure to conform on your part. In fact I must ask you now for the letter back. Failure to comply will be taken as failure to perform on your part. Do you understand."

I looked blindly at him. It took a moment for me to totally understand. I scanned the letter one last time and shook my head. That lying bitch! When I finished I put it in Oily’s outstretched hand. He tore the letter up, put the pieces in his ashtray then lit them. When they finished burning he looked up at me.

"Have you made your decision, Jackie dear, or would you prefer to talk to Nadine first?"

Didn’t know the contents my ass!

* * *

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Idea’s for Part II abound. Reader input will greatly determine the direction the story takes. What would you like too see happen? One reader’s comment was that the story was a little too intense. Did you find it that way? Should Jack(ie) become a shemale and live life as best possible while raising his girls as a single parent ­ fighting off ardent admirers, or should Lisa have the ultimate surprise waiting for poor Jack? Or should something else all together different take place? And a last question ­ revenge? Yes? No? Better left to the imagination?

If you enjoyed the story, drop us a note. Better yet, drop us a road sign so we’ll know which direction to go in Part II. And guys & girls, hell is not really a direction (giggle)!

 

© 2001
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