Maiden's Pageant           by: Janet L. Stickney                 Janetlynn17@Hotmail.com

 

When I went out that night I knew I was taking a chance, but I simply couldn't help myself. That yearning to go out, dressed as a girl, the one that had nagged at me for so long, finally won the argument between my fear, and my desire to do it. The minute I stepped out into the night, a wave of relief washed over me. The twinkling stars, the warm night air and the moonlight was nothing to the feel of fresh air on my newly shaved legs, the way my hair drifted in the breeze, or the way the skirt felt as I walked around the backyard. I reveled in the delight I was experiencing, the way the breast forms pulled at my blouse, the soft sounds of my shoes as they hit the patio floor, the smell of the makeup and the taste of the lipstick, all making that night one that would be etched into my memories. After about an hour I went to my room, changing back to my old self, showering, washing away all traces of makeup, then hiding my clothes in my locked trunk in the closet. I hated myself when I looked in the mirror, 15 years of being a boy did not compare to just one hour as a girl. I ached to be able to become a girl more often, but I was afraid.

Life went on as usual, then, just before my birthday, came the invitation. It was for the Maiden's Ball, the annual party hosted by the cities Parks and Recreation Department. Of course, no girls were allowed, only boys between the ages of 12 and 18, but they had to become girls, or rather, Maiden's, in order to compete, which had always meant the guys would be dressed for the entire week. I had yet to try it, simply because I was afraid that someone might figure out that I liked it, which, on the face of it, was silly. In our school alone about ten guys had done it, and three of them had even dressed as girls for a week before the week required, and a few of them had kept it up for a few days afterwards! This year, as I opened the invitation, that familiar feeling of denial swept over me, and I almost threw it in the trash. Then my mother stepped in the front door, and removed any doubt about my participation.

"Oh good! I see you have the invitation! When I get done with you, you'll be the prettiest girl at the Ball this year!"

"Me?" I said dumbly…"dress as a girl?"

"Of course!" mom said with a smile, "We both know that you've been playing dress up for a long time, so I think it's time we dragged that girl you've been trying so hard to hide out into the open. Now, I'm sure that you want to deny it, but I have made up my mind. You'll be a girl starting Monday, which means that we have tonight and all weekend to get you ready, which is plenty of time for us to get you a suitable wardrobe. You wait here while I get my measuring tape."

All sorts of things ran through my mind, one, mom obviously knew about my dressing up, even after I took great pains to hide it, and two, she sounded intent on making sure that I had enough clothes, makeup, and shoes to last me for a while! I really wanted to put my foot down and say no, but I just couldn't. Mom more than hinted that she knew about my hobby, so, if nothing else, I would have more clothes for when I did dress up in private, yet I was still worried that someone might find out that I liked to dress as a girl. I swallowed that fear and sat, waiting for mom to return.

Mom was no nonsense about it, and made a small list of things she said that I would need, then told me to get in the car, saying that it was time for us to select a wardrobe suitable for a brand new maiden. Without a word I followed her around the stores, watching as she kept adding things, some I had always wanted to buy but was afraid to, like a nightgown, plus bras that actually fit me, as well as some sort of padded pantybrief. Then pantyhose, a couple of skirts and blouses, and two dresses. In one of those inexpensive shoe stores she had me try on a pair of flats as well as a pair of heels. Then we left for home, all of the packages stacked in the backseat, waiting for me to try them on. Mom didn't say much, except that she had a few things she wanted me to do when we got home, then she said that we would start in the morning. As I dragged all of the packages to my room, she handed me a bottle of hair remover, and told me to use, everywhere I could reach, then shave what was left. She said that she wanted me as hairless as I could manage!

I could hardly wait to start, so I shut the door, stripped, and began. That night I slept in a nightgown for the very first time, with all sorts of strange visions running through my mind, not the least of which was, how would I look when mom was done with me? Hairless and only slightly less than totally scared, I appeared at breakfast the next morning in my nightgown. Mom didn't say a word, except to tell me that right after the dishes were done, she and I were going to turn me into what she called "a fetching beauty unequaled by any in the past". Once we were in my room, I faced the challenge of being naked in front of my mother for the first time since I was about ten, but she stood there, unmoving, until I finally took off the nightgown and stepped into the panties she handed me. It took about an hour for mom to turn me into the girl I always knew I had inside, and as I stood there looking in the mirror, I remembered just how easily she had done it.

Mom took me to her bedroom, sat me at her vanity, and started by telling me to do my own foundation. When I had covered my face, she told me to use the powder, then came a light blue eye shadow highlighted with a soft plum. A brown eyeliner on my upper lids, then a soft blue pencil under each eye with black mascara to lengthen my eyelashes. I watched as she put a few rollers in my hair, then it was back to my bedroom to get dressed. First was the bra, which she started to stuff with nylons, but I stopped her and got out my own, the birdseed filled ones I had made. Pantyhose were next, then a padded pantybrief which gave me hips and a modest shape. The skirt was a tan and white plaid with two inch pleats that was above my knees a little. The blouse was tan, short sleeved, and fit just right. Once I had that on, mom gave me the brown flats to wear and took me back to her bedroom where she finished doing my hair. I had a small bow on each side, those clip on kind, and my hair fell in bangs across my forehead while the back and sides framed my ears and face. Then came the lipstick, a pale plum color, and some brown and white earrings. Mom let me stare at my reflection for a moment, then took me by the hand to the familyroom.

"Well, what do you think honey? Is this better than you do by yourself?"

"Uhmmm yeah, I guess…"

"Okay then, tell me what we should call you? All of the Maidens have to pick out a girls name, what have you decided on?"

"Well,…" I said, "I was thinking….maybe…Diane?"

"Oh, that's a nice name" mom said with a smile, "very feminine without being flashy! I like it! Now," mom went on, "what do you think about doing a little shopping after we get you registered for the Ball? You'll need to have more than skirts, especially since you'll be dressing as a girl from now until after the ball, and you'll certainly need a ball gown, because, if you win, you'll have to make several appearances throughout the year. Having you there will make it easier to pick out the right size, and of course, the exact color that looks best on you."

As much as I wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to say anything, but mom simply handed me a small tan purse, told me to put my stuff in it, and went to get herself ready to go. Within twenty minutes we were in the car, headed for the office where all "Maidens" had to register. As we pulled up I saw two others like me, clearly boys, but wearing skirts and blouses, going into the building. I was duly registered, using only my new name, Diane. Everything else was correct, age, address and so on, then I had to see a nurse that confirmed that all of the applicants were actually boys. Twice in the past girls had tired to enter, so now they checked. Mom had planned on going out shopping, but it was getting close to dinner time, so we went home instead, with mom promising that we were going, first thing in the morning.

Since this was a community wide pageant, with more than a few boys walking around in dresses, nobody gave me even a second look when I registered, but at the mall, well, things might be different. That night, in the privacy of my bedroom, I tried on of the stuff mom bought that day. Just having a bra that fit was a major improvement, and with my homemade breast forms in the cups, I looked almost like a normal girl. The cup size was A, which looked a lot better than the B cup bra of mom's I had been using. Everything fit, and I slipped into bed wearing a nightgown for the first time, but so excited that I had a hard time sleeping.

After breakfast and the ritual that would become normal, mom and I turned me once again into a passable girl. I wore the same skirt, but a white top and the tan shoes when we left the house. Since my knowledge of women's clothes was limited to what I needed or saw in the catalogs, I didn't say a word as mom began top list the items she told me I would need for sure, plus some that "I might want for later". I knew that meant when I decided to dress up, after the pageant. The constant bleakness that had filled my heart every time I convinced myself that being a boy wasn't so bad, had been replaced by the knowledge that for a while I would be able to dress as a girl every day. Yet the knowledge was tempered with the irrational fear that I would look so good that nobody would believe I was a boy, or worse, they would know I was a boy wearing a dress, but it did not seem to matter. Either way, all my dressing as a girl would do is lead me down a path I did not want to return on, which would only make it harder on me when I had no choice but to return to being a boy again. I could sense that bleakness, waiting, hoping I would be a boy again very soon.

Yet every moment I spent with mom at the mall, in lingerie, then shoes, and the dress department only drew me in deeper. Each item she handed me, every time she asked my opinion, made me feel so much like a girl that by the time we stopped for lunch I had forgotten I wasn't a girl. I was at ease with myself, smiling as I told mom what "the other girls" wore to school, trying to get her to let me pick out what I liked. I had been swept away on a tide of femininity that washed over me, and I reveled in every minute of it. I picked out a Pushemup bra while mom added two that were plain white. I wanted to get satin, nylon or silk panties, but mom bought plain cotton. I wanted short skirts, but the best I could do was just above my knees. I also wanted low cut, while mom insisted that girls my age don't wear that, so I lost that one too. But, I did get a padded pantybrief and a waist nipper plus a pair of modestly priced breast forms, which I wore from the moment mom handed them to me. Cosmetics that suited my coloring better, and lastly, she had my ears pierced.

Mom had gone all out to make me look as normal as possible, for a girl that is, and in passing, I wondered why. Mom had never once mentioned my dressing up before, and I was sure that she didn't know, but she had always known about the Maiden's Ball, so I had to wonder why now, why not sooner. But I didn't ask her. I was just overjoyed to have so many clothes of my own, clothes that fit and were not hers, and be able to wear them openly. Then…

"Now that you have the right clothing" mom said, "I don't want to hear about you strolling the streets at night like some kind of common whore. Am I making myself clear? You were never quite as careful as you thought, and Mrs. Carson saw you, several times she told me, walking around late at night, always dressed as a girl. Now you can come and go as you please, but when you do, you'll be dressed as a girl, but somehow, I don't think that bothers you very much, does it?" I opened my mouth, but…"Never mind, I already know the answer. What I don't know is, can you give it up when the pageant is over?"

I plopped down on a bench, sitting the bags on the floor. Mom sat next to me, waiting for me to tell her the truth, the truth as I saw it. I wanted to blurt out what I felt, but struggled for the right words, words that wouldn't make me sound like a wimp. Only one word stuck in my brain, the only word I could manage. "No" I said, instantly ashamed.

"If that's the case" mom said, "then maybe we should do all we can to make it possible for you keep dressing as a girl! Come with me young lady, you are about to get your wish!"

"What does that mean?"

"It means" mom answered, "that we, you and I, are going to the beautyshop. I'm gong to have your hair styled and set in a way the suits you. That way you won't have to fuss with your hair so much. Maybe, if they think you need it, I'll let them thin out your eyebrows a little."

"A perm? You want me to get a perm?!"

"Not a hard set honey, but enough to make it easy for you to take care of. Why?"

"It's so…permanent! I would have to shave my head to get rid if it!"

"But you just told me that you want to be a girl! Did you change your mind?"

"No…but…"

"Then we'll do this my way, unless you are willing to quit that is."

"No…mom! But…a perm?"

Mom said yes, and I gave in, telling myself that if anyone asked, it was my mothers idea, and I just had to let it grow out, and having hair that looked like a girls, well, it was easier to just dress to fit the way my hair looked. I told myself that, hoping the lie wouldn't be so obvious.

I was a dream of mine, to be in a beautyshop, and I had made it at last. Looking around I saw women draped in smocks, pink, green and blue, their heads filled with curlers, admiring the work of the stylist, or various stages between. Mom spoke with someone at the counter, then I was taken to a seat by an older woman.

"Your first time honey" she asked. I nodded my head yes, and she patted my shoulder. "Your mother told me to make you beautiful, so how about we get started?"

My hair was washed, trimmed, then dyed, rinsed, set in curlers. Under the dryer both hands were done, my nails filed a bit rounder, then painted a soft plum. When that was done, another girl came over and began to apply some yellow gunk to each arm with a paddle. When she told me it was wax, I couldn't figure out why wax was being put on my arms. Then, when it cooled, she yanked it off! When my eyeballs were seated again, she rubbed in a lotion that took away some of the sting, and when I felt my arms, they were hairless! She carefully did each leg the same way, completing her torture by doing my eyebrows. I knew how a chicken must feel when it's being plucked! Two hours later I was allowed to stand up, the big mirror reflecting the girl I knew I was. Smooth skin, wavy auburn hair that almost reached my shoulders, accenting my blue eyes perfectly. If I ever thought about not doing this, those thoughts were relegated to the trash heap. I was a girl, and I loved the way I looked!

Mom told me I was gorgeous, but she's my mom, so what else would she say? By the time we got home I was thrilled at everything that had happened that day, but as I put my new clothes away, I set out a skirt and top, making plans to poke at someone that tried to cause me trouble. As the new breast forms tumbled out of the box, along with then came a small jar of adhesive. I changed my skirt, then called for mom, asking her to attach the breast forms, which she did. When I put my bra on, I not only looked normal, the weight I felt pulling at my chest gave me an even stronger sense of my rapidly growing femininity, and grinned widely. I slipped the top over my head, touched up my lipstick, dabbed my wrists with perfume, then walked out of my room, headed for the front door.

"Going somewhere Diane?"

"Mrs. Carson's. You said she has been watching me, so I thought I would let her see me in the daylight."

"And push her face in it too? That is no way for a young lady to act, and certainly no child of mine. I'll call and invite her over for lunch tomorrow. Then you can show her how you look."

Mrs. Carson did come over for lunch, but when I stepped out and she saw me for the first time close up, her eyes went wide as she saw, not a boy in a dress, but a girl standing right in front of her. With my breast forms glued on, the waist nipper doing its best to give me a smaller waist, and the padded pantybrief, I had a shape that was just right for a girl my age. With my makeup, nails, and hair done, there was no sign that I was actually a boy. Mom introduced me as her daughter Diane, which made Mrs. Carson shut off any comments she might have made. It was worth every minute of the time I took that morning when I got ready. By the time she had gone home, mom and I were smiling at each other.

That night I set out my clothes for the next day, my first day in school as a girl. The next day I was up a little earlier, the first thing I did was my makeup, then I got dressed. No waist nipper, but I wore the padded pantybrief, pantyhose, a short, pleated gray skirt with a simple white blouse, and my black flats. Mom helped me with my hair, then I added some perfume and did my lipstick. Grabbing my books and purse, I set out for school. At the corner I saw many kids that I knew, but none of them seemed to recognize me, which was just fine with me. But, when I sat in my regular seat in my first class, my secret was out. There were a few other guys dressed as girls, but they still looked like guys and always would. The reaction I got from the girls was stunned silence, while the guys just stared at me, at least until lunch that day. That's when I was joined at a table by three of the hottest girls in the school!

"Hi Diane" Megan said, "we all know that you might not think so, but you look really good; so good in fact that we were wondering if you really are a guy. I mean, you could be a cousin posing as a boy impersonating a girl, and well, the way the guys are looking at you, we think we deserve an answer."

"Megan" I said while choking on a bite of my sandwich, "You've known me since we started school, and you know perfectly well that I am not a real girl! I can't help the way I turned out…and besides, I'm not interested in guys!"

"Don't get your panties in a knot Diane, we had to ask. But listen, you can tell us that your not interested in guys, but with the way you look, they'll be all over you within a week, so you might as well go with the flow and enjoy it."

"Huh?" I said, completely perplexed.

"The guys pay when you go on a date silly! And who says that you have to do anything except be polite? If one of those hunks asks you out, try it, maybe you'll like it!"

After what Megan had told me, I became aware that some of the guys were watching me closely, closer than ordinary curiosity would warrant. Megan was right! Some of the guys were attracted to me! That made me feel good inside, but if I accepted a date, what would everyone say about me? Or him? I felt pretty good by the end of the day, and since I looked good enough to make the guys watch me, I actually relaxed. The next day, much like the first, left me feeling confident that I wasn't going to be harassed for looking the way I did. A couple of the other guys that were dressed as girls gave up, returning to school on the third day as themselves. Both of them told me that they felt like potatoes in a field of roses around me and Kathy, the other guy dressed as a girl. Kathy actually didn't look bad, but she still walked like a boy, and didn't have even one mannerism a girl normally had. She and I rarely talked.

As each day went by I became better able to do my own hair and makeup, and had it down to 45 minutes from the time I got up. I also began to try my hand at mixing and matching my small wardrobe. Mom began to treat me just like she would if I really were a girl, which at first pissed me off, then, when she told me that only a few people knew that I was really a boy, I would have to start thinking like any girl would, just to be safe, which made sense, and I calmed down. On Friday I wore jeans that were down on my hips a little, with a top that bared my navel, never expecting the reaction I got, but it wasn't from one of my classmates, it came from a teacher! Right in front of the entire class, she said…

"Young lady! That is inappropriate dress in this class! You will go change right now, or I will have no choice but to send you to the office!"

Young lady? She knew I was a boy! When I tried to tell her that I didn't have any other clothes at school, Megan slipped me the key to her locker, telling me she had a sweater there. Taking the key, I left the room, found the locker and took the sweater. I slipped it over my head and went back to class. The teacher smiled, and let me rejoin the class, but all I could think about was that she called me a young lady. Nobody in class snickered when she said that, which is when I knew that almost everyone had accepted me as a girl. I felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders, and smiled outwardly when that thought hit me. What happened when it was lunch time shook me almost more than anything else. I had just sat down, saw Megan and Heather across the room, and waved at them. They started towards me, the stopped when Gordon sat down next to me.

"Hi" he said, "Mind if I sit here with you?"

"Ummm…no, of course not" I said, trying to smile through my shock.

"I huh…well, listen Diane, the thing is, I was wondering if you would like to go to the show with me?"

Gordon had managed to get my undivided attention, but…"Gordie, you know who I am…right?"

"Yeah, so?"

"And you still want to take me to a show?"

"Sure! Why not? Everyone has been watching you, and the general thought is that even when this pageant is over you'll still be here, and if that's the case, then I want to…take you out."

I was speechless! Gordie sat there watching me, then he put his hand over mine and smiled. I looked up, saw the smile, and nodded my head yes. He grinned and told me he would be over to get me at seven on Saturday, then he asked me for my phone number and address, which I gave him. After lunch he walked me to class. Talk about being on a tall cloud! Of course, Megan, Heather and the others wanted to know what happened at lunch, but I played it down, telling them that Gordie was taking me to the show, but reminded them that he and I had been friends for a long time, and he was merely being kind. I saw Heather look at Janet and Megan with a shocked look on her face, then she shook her head.

"Guys just don't ask us out because they're being kind Diane! They're attracted to us, which is why they ask us out! That, and the fact that they want to get into our panties of course, but we never allow that. We let them think so, but we don't go there. Gordie likes you! Can't you see it? He's been mooning over you from the first minute you set foot in the school!"

"Mooning?" I said, "Over me? But everyone knows who I am! They all know this is for that Maidens Pageant, which means they all know that I'm not really a girl!"

"Yeah, we all know that hon, but you don't look the least little bit like a boy! When you showed up with your navel showing, the first thought I had was wow, and I know the everyone else felt the same way! Looking like you do, none of us can picture you quitting when the pageant is over, so you might as well get used to the idea that guys are attracted to you because you are hot!"

"That's what Gordie said. Is it true? That nobody expects me to become a boy again I mean?"

As one, they all agreed, which left me wondering if I could do it. Remain a girl I mean. When I got home that night I set the table and started dinner, and when mom got home I told her that Gordie had asked me out, then what the other girls had told me. It was up to my mother to allow it, and we both knew it. I did not say anything else, and while mom sat there looking at me, I grew edgy.

"I suppose they are right Diane, I can't see you quitting either, but the school system will have to go along with it, you do have two more years in high school you know."

"Does that mean you will let me be Diane from now on?" I know I sounded incredulous, but that's how I felt.

I was very surprised when mom slumped in her chair, her chin on her folded hands. "No matter what I do, it will be wrong somehow, but I have the feeling that even if I told you no, you would find a way to keep dressing as a girl. I had the same idea when we bought those clothes for you, watching you eagerly trying them on, selecting what you liked and so on, but I thought that you would only dress up once in a while! When we were in the stores you acted like any teenage girl I ever met, but I never expected you to fall so easily, and so well, into being a girl! Then, when I took you to the beautyshop, if you had put up even the smallest fuss, I would not have let them do so much to you, but you went for the gusto, and didn't even flinch, no matter what they wanted to do to you! And after watching you get ready every day, watching as you only got better and more feminine as the days went by, I saw my son become a girl in everything but body. When I saw what you wore to school today I was shocked at just how much of a girl you had become, so, since there probably isn't much I could do to stop you, I really don't have much choice, do I?"

The words popped out of my mouth without any thought at all. "I'll quit right now if you tell me to mom."

"Thank you dear" mom said, "but we both know you can't quit, can you?"

"I could try…"

"And you would fail Diane".

Mom sat upright, then asked me all about Gordie, then gave her permission for me to go out on my first date. I helped with the dishes, then went to my room and did my homework, signing it, for the first time, with my girl name. If I had to have the school system on my side, any papers I turned in with Diane written on them could be introduced as evidence that the school had accepted me as a girl long before the issue ever came up! How I reached that conclusion is beyond me, but it felt right, so I signed all of my work with my girl name.

I never mentioned my date again, but the two days I had to wait seemed to drag by. On Saturday morning after breakfast I picked out what I was going to wear…three times. Mom thought it was funny, but let me suffer through it by myself. In the afternoon I took a long bubblebath, which I had discovered felt wonderful, shaved everywhere I had hair I didn't want, then began to get dressed, because there was no way I was going to be late! I wore my best bra, a pleated green and blue skirt with pantyhose, I had done my makeup the best I ever had, and fussed with my hair. It was only after a few hours that mom came into my room, sat me down, and slowly helped me do my hair. I was nervous about dating, but mom told me it would be alright, then gave me a small gold ring to wear.

"This is mine, I wore it in high school. Your father gave it to me." The ring was plain gold with a narrow band and a small opal set in the top. "I think it's time I gave it to you, since your father and I always said it would go to our oldest daughter, and that's you." I slipped the ring on my finger, then hugged my mother tightly. "Just be a good girl tonight Diane."

"Trying to be light hearted, I said, "How can I be anything but a good girl mom?"

"There are plenty of ways a girl can make a man happy, but I don't think you're old enough to find out what they are. Just be polite. Be the girl you really are."

"Thanks mom."

I hugged her again, then I waited in my room for Gordie to arrive. Gordie and his father showed up at the door, everyone was introduced, then we left, being dropped off at the front door. Gordie wore aftershave, and smelled pretty good, something I had never paid any attention to before. Also, he was a full head taller than me. In the show, his arm was around my shoulders, and I casually leaned in his direction. During a scene in the movie that was very dark, He leaned over, and put his lips gently against mine. Shivers ran up and down my spine, but I didn't pull away, it felt nice, very nice. Later, at my front door, he kissed me again, a bit harder but no less exciting, and I went in the house positive that I could never give up being a girl, no matter what happened. I lay in bed that night reliving every moment of my first date, to excited to sleep.

Nobody said a word when I turned in my work with my girl name on it, and I simply went about being the best girl I could be. Megan, Janet and Heather wanted all the details of my date with Gordon, but all I told them was that I had a good time. I didn't think telling them that he kissed me was such a good idea, so I didn't. Some kids knew that Gordon and I had been out, but nobody acted as if it was some great sin, except that Gordie started to walk me to all of my classes, so everyone knew that he and I were a couple.. sort…of I guess. Time seemed to fly by, and soon it was only a few weeks from the pageant, and mom told me that it was time that she and I went shopping for a gown.

I had no idea what went into selecting a gown, but mom did, and since she was paying the bill, I let her guide me through it. The very first thing she said I needed was a corselet, which of course I had never heard of before. Believe me, I found out when mom picked one off the rack, and together in the changing room I tried it on. It looked just sexy as hell, until mom began to tighten the laces that is, then it became more like an instrument of torture. But in the end, when mom said it was tight enough and I looked in the mirror, my waist, normally 26 inches, was now a svelte 24 inches, and my breasts had been pushed up and out, filling the built in bra cups to the max. The corselet was white, which mom said was fine, then, after I went to take it off, mom pulled the tags off and told me to keep it on. We added a pair of white satin high cut panties before we left the store.

The dress I ended up with was not a prom gown, but an all white bridal dress! It was off the shoulder, white satin brocade with Irish lace inserts and a small train. I have to admit that nothing made me feel more feminine than that dress, and I didn't want to take it off. Shoes with a matching handbag, pearl earrings surrounded with gold, then, mom and I expanded my humble wardrobe a bit more with some jeans, a few blouses, more skirts, and two more dresses. By the time we got home I wanted to try on the dress again, and mom let me, telling me that she had a few alterations to make anyway. I still had on the corselet, growing used to the snugness of it, but loving the shape it gave me. After mom made marks on my gown, and I had taken it off, I stood there with mom, staring at each other. Mom finally left the room, and I quickly put on a pair of jeans and a top, then left the house to walk over to Janet's, the nearest of my three girlfriends.

Janet and I sat on the porch, and I described my new dress in great detail. Then she casually mentioned that she had heard that the city was going to add a big dance to the gala events on the night the Maiden was selected, then asked me if I was going to ask Gordon to be my escort. Since Gordie was the only guy that showed any interest in me at all, I said I probably would, which is when she broke out in a big smile.

"That's good, because he has the hots for you big time Diane, and everyone knows it too!"

"We have gone out exactly once! How can he have the hots for me?! Besides, everyone knows that I'm not a girl, I'm only playing one for the pageant!"

"Only playing one?" Janet said, "Not hardly…you like being a girl to much. You look, act, talk and everything else, just like the rest of the girls, and besides, nobody thinks you'll quit once the pageant is over, and going out with Gordie made it a sure thing Diane!"

Janet had it right. I had no intention of going back to my old boy self. I just had to hear it one more time I guess. The next day I asked Gordie to escort me to the pageant, and he asked me out again. Kathy, the only other guy dressing as a girl, had gotten better in almost every way, from the way she dressed, acted and talked, and now had some guys around her all of the time. At first I really didn't care if I won the pageant, only that I could dress as a girl, but as the time drew closer, I found out that I wanted to win. I wanted to win because it would confirm my ability to be a girl, and better, Since whoever won would have to make appearances thru out the year, I could use that as one more reason not to be forced to return to being a boy. As the days edged closer to the pageant itself, I became edgy and unsure of myself, yet, when Gordie took me out the second time, I felt very at ease with myself, more when he kissed me again.

Unknown to me, mom had made arrangements for me at her beautyshop, and on the morning of the pageant I found myself once again in the stylist chair. I was in the salon for almost four hours as almost every inch of my skin was waxed to remove the hair, my nails done, that time with acrylic extensions, my hair was set and restyled, more color added, then my makeup was done by a pro. When I saw myself in the mirror I was in awe of the way I looked, and thanked everyone for their hard work. At home, mom helped me get dressed, starting with the white satin panties. The corselet worked the magic on my waist and breasts, then came the white nylons, attached to the garterbelt, something new for me. As each item was added, I descended into my own femininity, deeper than ever before. When the dress was slipped over my head, zipped up and I stepped into the heels, my conversion to girl was complete, only the trimmings needed to finish the picture.

Mom changed clothes, then Gordon and his dad showed up to get us. After pictures were taken, we drove to the huge hall, and Gordon ushered me inside. There were about 40 contestants, some of them simply breath taking in their beauty, some not, but all of them from schools all over the county. I took my number, and eventually I found myself walking on stage, then out on the promenade, turning this way and that, smiling the whole time. Then I had to stand there and state my name, where I went to school and so on, all under the eyes of the judges. After the last contestant was done, a short meeting was held by the judges, the emcee stood in center stage, and began to read off the names. Seven in all, a queen and her court of six. One by one the names were called for the court, mine not among them, then, I heard my name called!

I was not named the queen, but I was second in line if she could not do her duties. The girl that won was tall with long brunette hair, a body to die for and a very bright smile. Everything you would see at a normal beauty pageant was there, crying and smiles, flowers and crowns, and while I did not win the contest, I won more than that. I won the battle of who I was, and that was enough for me. Later, at a meeting of the winners, I found out that Christine, the winner, had, just like me, no intention of going back to being a boy…ever again. Gordon escorted me back to the table, then out on the dance floor, holding me tightly in his arms, looking down at my face, and smiling. I saw mom dancing with Gordie's dad, both of them smiling, and ignoring us. Gordon took my hand and led me out on the huge walkway that overlooked the river, swept me into his arms, and kissed me, his tongue probing and urgent. Then he opened his hand, and gave me his class ring. It felt hot in my hand, yet I held it closely while nodding my head at the same time.

It has been almost four months since the pageant, and I have continued to be myself, attending school as Diane, with nobody commenting about it at all. Gordon and I played "explore" the other night, and although some might say it was a "groping" session, it was my turn to explore the rest of my femininity. As it turns out, Gordon took me to the highest of highs, and that was the final nail. Mom and I no longer have words about how I dress, and we have settled into a routine that many mothers and daughters have. I love every minute of it, and find myself wondering why I never entered the pageant earlier, but now that I have made the change from boy to girl, it no longer matters.

 

© 2001

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