"Someone's knocking at the door, somebody's ringing the bell, do me a favor, open the door and let 'em in." -- Wings/McCartney

  

A Life Ever Changing

by Angel

#21 - Ringing the Bell

  

It had been over three hours and I needed to call Barbara. I knew she was waiting for my call restless and fidgety! I could just picture her sitting next to the phone very anxiously...

Home was just 10 minutes away. Lost in thought those few minutes can stretch on for an eternity. I was sitting in the back seat with the present sitting on the seat between my mother and me. Grace was driving and Aunt Harriet looked lost in thought as I glanced at her. All was quiet in the car now.

I guess the full impact of what really took place had settled on everyone. Grace was the only one wearing a smile like she knew something we had not all realized yet. I looked at my mother and she was deep in thought oblivious to everything else. I decided to put off any deep thinking for the moment and reached for my latest present. I have been getting several of these lately. How many does that make now? Let's see, first Betty's, then Lucy's, Grace's, Anna's, My Mom's, Aunt Harriet's and now Mrs. Meier's.

The present was large but not too heavy. It was wrapped in the stores paper and had their logo imprinted on it. Tied with twine and taped on the ends. I' untied the twine and carefully loosened the tape and unwrapped the paper. Grace was the only one that took any notice of what I was doing. I had seen her eyes reflecting back at me as I glanced into the rearview mirror. The others? Still lost deep in thought and reflecting on events recently past.

The box itself was one recycled from a supplier. I unfolded the flaps and looked inside. On top was the bra I was promised. I lifted it out and looked at the package still sealed and brand new. "COMFORT BRA" it read. I opened the package and slid out the bra holding it in my hands. It felt very soft and was stretchy. Light, airy and sheer with a flower pattern weaved into the cups. I noticed the back had three hooks with three different rows of them to choose from. The shoulder straps were wide and fully padded. I refolded it and slid it back into its package. I laid it aside and looked in the box once again.

I was surprised to find a set of diapers, four of them imprinted with pink, blue and yellow flowers. I set these aside and peeked at the rearview mirror seeing Grace smiling even bigger! Hmm, I smiled back wondering why I had received a set. I knew I would find out! I already knew what diapers felt like to wear! I guess Mrs. Meier's didn't know that though.

I looked in the box once more and found two matching plastic panties but these had four rows of wide lace on the fanny part! One had pink and white lace while the other had yellow and blue. OH CRAP! Very cute they would be on a baby or child. These though were for an adult! I put these aside as well and looked back into the box.

Now this was nice! It was a stethoscope and not a cheap model either! Colored white, it came with several cloth sleeves you could cover the white tubing changing its color. There was a pink one, a blue one and a white one with red flowers. Interesting I would have never thought of such a detail as this! I set these aside and looked in once more.

A blue cuff with a heavy metal gauge hooked to it. On the package it red "SPHYGMOMANOMETER" (Ed.--Yes, that is spelled right. :)) and in smaller print it read "BLOOD PRESSURE CUFF WITH GAUGE" Oh, ok! COOL!

I set this aside and found another package with a clear plastic cover. Inside it held several bottles of massage lotions and oils. Hmm, Next to that was another package that held baby oil, a small pair of scissors and a very small electric shaver shaped like hair clippers. In small lettering it read "PRE-OP PREP KIT" and "PERI-AREA PREP." Ok, I got it now! Secretly hoping I would have a chance at giving AUNTIE a cute little heart shaped design! I chuckled to myself quietly.

On the very bottom of the box I found a very peculiar package. It was fairly fat and square but long. It read "INTERNAL DOUCHE KIT." It continued describing the contents, which were hard for me to understand so I opened it to see what it looked like. HOLY SHIT! Colored all pink there was a fairly large squeeze bulb that could hold a cup or two of solution. Yes, several packages of powdered douche solution and what I lifted out next really surprised me!

It looked like a pink penis! Flatter at the tip but it was slightly curved and had four holes running in three rows down the sides from the tip about one-quarter the way down. It must have been at least six inches long! I remember seeing what I thought at the time was a hot water bottle hanging from the showerhead at home. It had a long tube with a slim curved nozzle on the end with holes in it. I had thought it to be a deeper penetrating nozzle for enemas! Yes, I, as well as my little brother and sister had received enemas in the past. The nozzle was shorter than this one was and the hole was at the tip. Hmm, I got it now!

But why this model? It looked a lot bigger to me! What was the advantage this particular model had over the one my mother used? I would ask Grace later. I looked up at the rearview mirror and Grace looked like she was going to bust a gut trying not to laugh out loud! She finally broke and let out a series of giggles. Nobody but Grace and I heard a thing. My mother and Harriet were still lost in their own words.

The box was empty now and I quickly put everything back in as we arrived at Harriet's house. Wait! Something just fell out of the small stack of diapers! It was a sealed envelope with Rachel written on it. Hmm.

Grace was laughing out loud now no longer able to contain herself! My mother and Aunt Harriet were looking at her strangely as they came out of their own little worlds. I must have turned red because Grace just laughed all the harder while pointing at me trying to tell the others why she was laughing so hard.

She reached over and opened the glove compartment and pressed a button. The trunk lid popped open all by itself! WOW! COOL! You could open the trunk from inside the car! (Ed.--Something that was very rare and very cool in 1969.)

Grace had gotten herself under control and was telling the others why she was laughing. She said, "You should have seen Rachel's expressions as she pulled the items out of the package Mrs. Meier's had given her! I wish I could have taken pictures!" She chuckled again and said, "Wait until we get everything inside and I will show you what I mean. I know Rachel has a few questions and we all should help her with providing her with the answers." She started laughing again and I was getting a nervous!

They each grabbed as much as they could which emptied the trunk as I carried the box into the house. Aunt Harriet told us to take everything into the recreation room in the basement.

Her basement was refinished a few years ago complete with a separate full bathroom and guest room. It had a pool table, stereo, TV, couch and several chairs it was carpeted wall to wall. It was like a small apartment without a kitchen. It did have a small refrigerator though and a small wet bar! All this was in just one half of the basement. The other half was a small private beauty shop, which had everything she needed for one client at a time. We placed all the items on the pool table and sat down.

I jumped up and said, "BARBARA! I have to call Barbara!" I ran upstairs and dialed the number. She picked up on the first ring! She sounded like she was crying. I said, "Barbara Honey, don't cry I love you very much and will never leave you. You will have to decide if you want to stay with me. Once I tell you what I have become and what I am doing you might just want to forget you ever met me."

She screamed into the phone deafening me for a few seconds. All I heard her scream at me was, "Rich, you stupid shit!" and then I was deaf!

When I could hear again I hollered into the phone, "WAIT I CAN'T HEAR! Will you stop screaming?" I guess I had deafened her because the phone went silent for a second or two.

Then I heard her say, "I know everything already! I made my mom tell me. She had to tell me I wouldn't let her NOT TELL ME!"

OH SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She said, "Rachel, My mother is bringing me to you right NOW! As soon as we hang up I am leaving and will be there in a little while. I love you and you are not going through this without me! That's it and no arguments!" She hung up. SHE HUNG UP ON ME!

I slowly walked down the stairs back into the basement. I realized my girlfriend was going to be seeing me in about an hour and suddenly I felt pain. I mean I really felt physical pain. All I could mumble to them between spasms of pain was, "Barbara knows, her mother told her and they are on their way over here right now."

Grace looked at me real closely and asked me how I was feeling. I said, "I am very sore and I think I am bleeding." I WAS VERY SORE! I could hardly hide it anymore. It hurt like hell and felt like I was being stuck with a hundred needles at the same time!

Now that I was thinking about it I was more aware of the pain. I could now feel a throbbing sensation and with each beat of my pulse a new wave of pain hit me. All three women helped me into the guest bedroom and they started undressing me. I did not resist at all! They took off my skirt, half slip, and panties just leaving the belt and pad on. I sat on the bed and they took off my sneakers and socks.

Grace hurried upstairs as my mom and Harriet had me stand up for a second as they put a towel on the bed and had me sit on that. They then had me lay back and rest my head on the pillow.

I felt a little strange as I realized I was wearing just a blouse and a sanitary belt and pad. The pain was getting so severe I did not care though! Harriet took out my ponytail and I found it much more comfortable. My mom came out of the bathroom with a towel and laid it across my forehead cool and comforting. She stroked my hair softly and gently over and over. I was relaxing as best I could until another throbbing pulse caused more pain to shoot through my most sensitive parts.

Grace came back downstairs with everything that was needed and started wetting the pad with a solution. She told me to always wet a pad with sterile water before removing it. That way the pad would not stick to dried blood, which could tear or at least pull away a layer or two of skin. She said most women would shower or just wet it in the bath but this case was different I had sutures that must remain clean and sterile water should always be used in cases like this. Another lesson learned which I would gladly remember!

Once she wet the pad she waited a little while unhooked it from the belt and slowly peeled away. I WAS BLEEDING! I was glad I had been wearing the belt and pad! What a mess that would have made if I had bled in just my panties and it would have shown through the slip and skirt I was sure.

Grace very gently and with a very soft touch cleaned as much as she could with dampened gauze pads. She told me she had added LIDOCAINE to the solution, which would help deaden the pain. Shortly thereafter it did!

Harriet had me lift my fanny as she slipped a folded rubber sheet and a few more towels under me. Grace used a slim nozzle and douched the area with the same solution and what a relief that was! She used a few cotton tipped applicators that were individually wrapped to dry and clean away any blood that remained inside the sutured folds.

I was glad I was numb already because she laid a covered ice bag on my groin then! My mother handed me a glass of water and two pills which I swallowed. I felt better already and it was nice knowing that I had these women who loved me this much to take care of me.

I noticed I was red and puffy down there! It looked even more like female anatomy and not one suture had given way. It was funny though seeing just a little puffy patch of pubic hair seemingly separate and a bit above my new femaleness.

Grace took charge once more and said, "Let's not waste any of this time. Julia would you bring in the box Rachel was given by Mrs. Meiers." My mom went and retrieved the box and brought it into the bedroom and set it on the bed. Grace reached in and took out the envelope, opened it and handed its contents to me.

There was a card and two pieces of writing paper. I looked at the card and it was a $50.00 gift certificate for the store! Wow! It was made out to Mrs. Meiers though. I handed it to Grace and asked, "Why is it made out to Mrs. Meier's instead of me?"

Grace answered, "Rachel, she wants to be there with you when you use it I suppose."

That made sense so I nodded and started to read the two-page note Mrs. Meier's had written me. I read aloud, "My Dear Rachel, you have touched me in my heart which I have not felt coming from someone so young in a very long time. You reminded me of myself when I first started in this field so long ago. You are much more beautiful than I was though and your eyes are a window to your heart and soul." (OH PLEASE! I groaned. Beautiful indeed! I really don't think I am beautiful maybe pretty with a lot of help!)

"Your keen interest in learning and your gentle touch and compassion for others were clearly shown to all that was there in attendance. Your Aunt, though embarrassed at times as we all would have been, showed her utter trust and confidence in you. That by itself is testimony to your utter selflessness and total commitment in providing quality care to others. Rachel, I would like to offer you my services as a teacher and also as a good friend you can rely on in your future. I am getting on in years now and my body reminds me of this every second of every day. If I knew that it would be you giving me care when the time comes I would be very happy and content. To that end please find enclosed a gift certificate, my address and phone number. Please contact me soon."

There was also a post-script which read, "I also have a complete classroom at my home which I wish to share with you, your mother and Grace would be more than welcome to assist." It was signed, "Sincerely, Mrs. Meiers".

WOW! I looked around at everyone and they were all smiling. My mother was a shining beacon and said, "Rachel, I am so proud of you! Your heart reaches out and touches almost everyone you meet. You see what we are all trying to show you?"

I smiled at her and said, "Mommy," (MOMMY? I haven't called her that since I was 8 years old! Where did that come from?) "I understand but a little right now. More and more becomes revealed to me as time passes, but I have a very long way to go before I really understand what I am to learn from this."

My mother continued, "Rachel, Barbara and Rita love you very much. I don't think you have to worry about anything but getting back on your feet and experiencing more. Barbara can help you in ways we cannot."

I answered, "Yes, you're right. I have to be realistic and I know that they love me. I just hope Barbara and I can really still love each other while I am like this. When she sees me like this and still hugs and kisses me I will know and everything will be alright."

Grace jumped in and asked me chuckling as she did, "Rachel, are you really sure you are only sixteen." We all laughed then and the mood lightened and that is when Grace held up my new DOUCHE KIT! OH CRAP!

Grace began saying, "Now Rachel, I noticed you had a very questioning look when you took out this package. You even took it out and examined it and still had questions didn't you?"

I answered, "Yes, I have several questions about this douche kit. First, this is different than the one douche kit I have seen. Second, there is no water bottle like an enema bag just a large squeeze bulb. Third, there is no long tubing like I have seen. Fourth, I have only seen two types of nozzles, one that is obviously for giving an enema, which is relatively short with one opening at the very end for the solution to flow out of. The other longer and slim with a wider tip and it has holes along the sides and none at the tip like the enema nozzle. This one is like an artificial penis the only difference being the very tip is flatter. Why?"

All three ladies looked very surprised at my observations and question! My mother even turned red when I mentioned it looked like a penis. I chuckled and gave them my "WELL?" look.

Grace nonplussed looked at me and held up the solutions first and read out the label of each packet. One was for a medicinal solution and the others were of different scents. All of them were for cleansing the vaginal canal. (CANAL? Strange description!) Ok, I got it now!

Grace went on, "The bulb as you probably have surmised is to for mixing and holding the solution. This is for one complete dose needed for a satisfactory douche. The bulb holds two full cups of the solution selected. The medicinal douche is used for just after your menses or also called your period. It can also be used when directed by your gynecologist for other problems as well. They can and are often used whenever you want to feel fresh and clean. Most women use these sometime after lovemaking or masturbation." (Wait a second here! Ok, get a grip and take a slow deep breath!)

My mom and Harriet were a little red. I chuckled seeing this and they just shook their heads and chuckled with me. Grace continued as she held up the nozzle, "This nozzle inserts into the bulb like this." (She inserted the bottom part into the bulb until a circular ridge fit into a circular depression in the mouth end of the bulb and was secure.)

"You will notice that there is another circular depression in the bulb further down?" I did notice the second ring. "You notice that the nozzle has a flange at the base here. You use this to push down the nozzle so that it fits into the second ring. You really don't have to see it because you can feel and hear it reach this position. Here, Rachel, you push down on it with your eyes closed and you will be able to understand what I am saying."

With that she handed it to me and I closed my eyes and did as she instructed. I could feel it fit into position and I could hear it as well. It had made a soft but distinctive plopping sound. I nodded my head and said, "You're right, Grace, I not only felt it, I heard it as well."

Grace continued, "Rachel, the reason for the thickness and length is precisely as you described. It is to resemble an average penis and fit like one in the vagina."

I quickly glanced around at the others and no one was red or smiling or showing any signs other than an interest in what was being said. I guess I was one of the girls after all! This is what it must be like during one of those mother/daughter talks. I felt better about looking and feeling the way I did then. I guess it was a feeling of acceptance I had not really felt until I met Mrs. Meiers.

Grace continued, "The curve you can see in its shape is to help with the irrigation of the vagina. When you twist it using the bulb it opens the vagina creating a spill gap which allows the solution to flow out and also cover the whole area inside the canal." She demonstrated by twisting the bulb while holding her hand loosely over the end of the nozzle. It did just as she said.

She added, "You insert the nozzle like so and you then squeeze out about half of the solution working the nozzle straight forwards and pulling it backwards repeatedly. Then you twist the bulb causing the gap for releasing the solution held in the vaginal canal. You then repeat the process the second time twisting it side to side repeatedly causing the solution to flow out soon after it enters. That is how you use this type of a douche kit. Many women prefer this type of kit. The reasons are obvious, don't you think?"

I answered, "Yes, I do see and the reasons are more obvious to you than they are to me but I understand."

All the ladies chuckled and smiled then. Grace then held up a conventional or an enema bag-type douche kit and said, "Rachel this is the most common household douche kit. It is called a combination enema and douche kit. All you do is change the tubing and nozzle to switch from one to the other. In girls most of them have their hymens still intact."

I looked at her questioningly then, like what is a hymen? She answered my unasked question, "This is very important for you to know Rachel so listen carefully. A hymen is skin tissue that in the vaginal canal of young girls provides a barrier and is located about one quarter to one half its depth. Most hymens are perforated allowing the blood and fluids to flow out during menses or allow for it to be cleaned by a douching. The majority of the young girls can handle this size nozzle with little to no discomfort. If they were to use this other type their hymens would rip and they would no longer be considered a virgin. A virgin is a girl or woman with this Hymen still intact. Do you understand?"

I did understand now! Wow, so much to learn! Ok, young girls had if they were still a virgin or did not break it by any other means a hymen. A perforated section of skin located in their vaginal canals. You could still douche, but one had to be more careful if you wished to stay a virgin in the eyes of others. I asked, "Who would really care if the hymen was still intact or not. I mean who would really know besides the girl?"

My mother answered this one for me. She said, "Rachel, on your wedding night when your new husband makes love to you, you will know right away." I got it!

I said, "Ok, I understand, but there must be many girls who for some reason or other no longer have their hymens intact."

Harriet answered this one, "Yes, Rachel, there are many causes when this happens, but if it is not a medical one it is still considered to be taboo."

Grace added, "In today's world it is far less important to remain virginal. Many people will accept a verbal reason and no longer require proof as they did in the past."

What? They required proof? I asked, "You mean to tell me that a young girl was supposed to allow someone to examine her before she got married?"

All three women said, "YES!" OH CRAP! That must have been horrible!

I looked at Grace and asked, "Which of these kits will I be using on those I care for?"

Grace answered, "Probably both. You see in private duty care you use what the person owns and uses. In most facilities we use the bag type and I have heard that they will be using the disposable type now that they have come down in price and are more easily used. When they first came out they were not only very expensive, but they did not work well. We still are questioning the minimal amount of solution they contain as well." Grace asked me, "Do you have any more questions and do you understand what has been taught about douches and such?"

I answered, "Oh, yes, I understand perfectly in the sense of knowing about these things. As for experience though, I only have what enemas feel like to compare. I do have one question about the hymen issue though." All three women looked at me with the expression of "out with it" written on their faces. I asked, "Does it hurt real bad when the hymen is broken?"

They all answered, "YES!"

My mother added, "It really depends on a few things, Honey. How gentle your husband is or how rough he is. You see if he enters you slowly and gently he will stretch it and your hymen will eventually give way. If he takes his time it can hurt a lot less. Unfortunately your husband is usually not thinking of you at all at that moment. He thrusts and thrusts urgently and forcefully and that does hurt. The good part is that the pain lessens as time goes on and other feelings can help override the pain after a short while. If not it might take even as much as a week for you to feel no pain when having intercourse. Foreplay makes the experience far more enjoyable and can be as satisfying for you as it is for your husband."

I asked, "Foreplay?"

Aunt Harriet answered, "Rachel, remember when we were removing all your body hair in the shower?" OH! DID I REMEMBER THAT! WOW! They laughed seeing my expression! Harriet then said, "That was like foreplay, really it was unintentional and just happened because we were not thinking about what might happen when we were washing the ointment off of you. If we did and we had wanted you to really enjoy the experience we would have taken much longer and concentrated on more areas. Now that would have been more like good foreplay."

I asked, "Good foreplay?"

They all giggled and Grace said, "Rachel, most men consider foreplay as a good feel and grope session until they achieve a sustained erection and an urgent need for release. They really don't think of you at all. For most men lovemaking is a one-sided affair, THEIRS! It is a very selfish act and not really what you could consider an act of love at all. Most women only achieve their satisfaction through self stimulation."

I was surprised at that! I said, "You mean to tell me that the majority of women are hardly ever if ever satisfied by their husbands?"

All three said, "YES!"

That is really horrible! I swore to myself then and there that I would never even enter my lady until after she was satisfied by very good foreplay and then I would be very slow and gentle! Never would I rush or hurt her! What a crappy thing to do!

I said, "Selfish love is not love at all, 'Selfless' love is what love is all about. It is in the giving not in the receiving that one really shows love!"

It was hug-fest time then! All three ladies hugged and kissed me until I had to beg them to stop! They all laughed and Grace asked me, "Rachel, you're really only sixteen right?" I wish she would stop asking me that!

Just then the doorbell rang!

  

  

  

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