Jeff, or Janet by: Janet Stickney JanetLynn17@hotmail.com
Sometimes I think I'm crazy, yet I always come back to it. I like to dress as a girl, and no matter how hard I try it simply will not go away. My name is Jeff, I'm 16, about 5' 7" tall, weigh maybe 140, and I have brown hair and blue eyes. Until my sister moved out and went to college I was able to 'borrow' things from her, and I did manage to salvage a few things before she left. A skirt and blouse, some shoes, and a bra. Not much, but it was enough for me at the time. Megan was gone almost two months when the urge to dress came over me. I was in my room with the door shut, completely dressed, looking in the mirror when the door opened; I turned to see my mother standing there. Unable to run and hide, no gun to kill myself with, I was caught like a deer in the headlights. I stood there unable to move, waiting for her to do or say something for what seemed like forever. At last, she walked in and shut the door.
"All of your life you have been told to do it right or not at all Jeff. Just look at you!"
I thought I was beautiful, but of course I wasn't, it was all in my mind.
"What you need is some help!"
"Help?"
I asked, afraid to say anything more.
"Yes help. Stay here, I'll get my tape."
Mom returned in a moment and began to measure me. Hips, waist, bust, neck size, length of my legs and arms, and lastly from my navel through my crotch to my back. "I think that should do it for now. Come to my room and let's get you fixed up a little better."
I sat at her vanity while she rolled my hair in the pink rollers I had seen so many times before. When she was done she began to apply foundation, eyeshadow, eyeliner and blusher to my face.
"Now I want you to strip for me Jeff."
"What!"
"Strip!"
My mother had not seen me naked in years and I didn't want to start now, but I looked in the mirror and saw Janet for the first time, and slowly began to undress. When I got to my briefs mom handed me a pair of panties and turned around. I slipped them on and 'tucked' myself away before she turned back.
"This bra is shot, but it will have to do for now. Put it back on."
I did as she told me and pushed in my homemade birdseed breastforms.
"Now we make you look like a girl Jeffrey."
She wrapped a waist nipper around me and fastened the hooks and zipped it up, making me feel like I was being cut in two! After that came the pantyhose, a camisole and half slip.
"Now you need something to wear."
I could hardly wait to see what she had in mind, and was pleasantly surprised when she showed me a dress my sister had bought and never worn. She handed it to me and I slipped it over my head and she zipped it up. That's when I realized how short it was! The hem was mid thigh on me while the skirt flared at my hips. The bodice hugged my mid section accenting my boobs, and the round neckline hinted at but did not reveal my boobs.
I sat back at the vanity as mom took the rollers out and brushed my hair out, creating a very feminine hairdo for me. When she was done I picked up the lipstick and traced my mouth with shiny pink.
"Put these on Jeff, and then stand in front of the mirror."
Janet stood there looking back, feminine, without a trace of the boy under it all.
"I think this is what you had in mind. Right?" I looked in the mirror again and could not stop myself from smiling. "Never mind! I know what the answer is anyway."
Mom told me to come with her to the patio, but since I had never even been out of my room dressed I hesitated.
"It'll be okay Jeffrey, now come with me."
She took my hand and we walked down the stairs and out on the patio. I felt the swish of the dress as I walked, tasted the lipstick, and wanted more. I sat across from my mother, my hands in my lap with my knees locked together while I waited for her to say something, anything, about how I was dressed.
"Now that you're all dressed up, what do I call you? Jeffrey sounds so…male."
Up to that point I had not given any thought to a name for my female self simply because I never needed one!
"Um, I don't have one."
"I see. How about Janet?"
"Okay." I said, rolling the name Janet off my tongue a few times to get used to it.
"Now that you're all dressed up why don't we go out and get you some proper underwear of your own?"
Out! My own mother wanted me to go out? Dressed like this?
"No way mom! What if someone saw me? I would be done for in school! I'd be…"
Mom raised her hand to stop me, then told me to go look in the mirror again, and come back and tell her that I looked like my old self. I knew she was right, but the thought of going out in public scared me because I was sure that I would be recognized.
"No more talk about it Janet. I'll get you a purse and we are going." That was the end of it as far as my mother was concerned. Me, I could not think of anything more dangerous.
When mom reappeared she handed me a handbag, and we walked out to the car. After that things got crazier. We walked into the mall and straight into the lingerie section of a huge department store, and as I stood there mom began handing me things she said I would need. Three bras, size 36A, a dozen cotton panties in a variety of colors, two slips, some pantyhose, and then, a waist nipper and a padded pantybrief. We were on our way out of the store when she dragged me into the dress department where she bought me two new dresses, a skirt, and three blouses.
"I think that will do for now Janet. We'll get you some makeup and jewelry of your own later, maybe tomorrow."
On the way out we walked right past two guys I went to school with! I actually felt them looking at me, and with every step I was sure they were about to holler out my name. They never did, and once I was in the car I collapsed while mom only chuckled.
"They didn't recognize you Janet, they were busy undressing you with their eyes! It's something all pretty girls get used to. It looks like you will too!" I took the packages to my room and put the things in my dresser or closet, and still dressed, joined my mother in the kitchen.
"Why are you doing this mom? I mean…"
"I know what you mean Janet. Sit down and I'll tell you." We sat down, and she told me about some patients of hers. "As a nurse I see a lot of people, many of them who have injured themselves for one reason or another. I have had two patients that were like you, men that wanted to dress as women, but in their anger mutilated themselves. One died and the other was seriously injured. I would rather have you talk to me, dress when you need to, and become a real lady if that's what's in store for you. I do not want you to harm yourself because you have no outlet for this! That's why I bought those things for you today." I had no idea that my mother even knew about what I was doing, let alone support me, and I was stunned. "Why don't you put on some clean panties and one of the new bras and model the dresses we bought today?"
"Okay mom."
After dinner I modeled the clothes for her and let her fuss about the adjustment on the bras. That night I went to bed wondering just what was going to happen next. In the morning I showed up at the table in my pajamas, my hair still showing the remnants of her handiwork the day before. As I sat down mom smiled at me and told me that we should have gotten me a nightgown.
"You have another three weeks of school left, so I was wondering if you would like to become Janet for the summer."
I had not thought of it, my mind still on the day before, but it was an invitation that I could not refuse even as my mind screamed 'you're a fool for doing this!'.
"We have that trip planned for July, and by then you'll be able to do your own hair and makeup. How about it? Do you think that you would like to become a girl for the summer?" All I could do was nod my head yes.
I dressed again that day but never left the house, and as school slowly came to an end, mom began buying me a few things she said I would need. She was at home on the last day of school, sitting at the kitchen table waiting for me.
"I brought home a few special things for you to use. Let's go to your room and get you ready." Following her, I had no idea what she was talking about, but let her lead the way. In my room there were several boxes on the bed, but all mom did was tell me to strip. "This is a cream hair remover. It will make your skin as smooth as mine."
Then she began to slather it all over me, even on my butt! I didn't have that much hair to start with, but mom said it would take it all off. In the bath I did my groin area and waited about 30 minutes before I popped into the shower and rinsed it all off. I washed my hair and shaved as close as I could before I stepped out and joined mom in my room. With only a towel around me I could now feel the cooler air as it hit my now very naked skin, sending shivers up and down my spine.
With the towel still wrapped around me mom rubbed in a lotion that replaced the oils lost using the hair cream, then, as I watched her she opened one of the boxes on the bed and pulled out a breast!
"These are the best on the market. I got them on loan for you to try on for fit." Then she put some adhesive on the breast and my chest, let them both dry, and firmly pushed the breastform onto my chest. Using her finger she smoothed out the thin seams then did the other side. I looked in the mirror and it was as if I had grown them myself! They were a perfect match in skin tone, and the seams could not be seen unless you were right up close! "Now this I had to buy, and once you have it on it, just like the breastforms, it will stay on for at least three months. She held it up and almost swallowed my tongue. It was a flesh colored panty that had rounded hips and backside built in, and also, looked exactly like a vagina! Holding it I could see the sheath that my penis had to go into and the split up the back. "Use this to lubricate yourself then pull the panty almost all of the way on."
I did as she told me, then with it almost on, she used the adhesive again. When it was dry mom and I pulled it up and made sure it was in place before she smoothed out the seams. All at once I looked like a female!
"Why all of this mom? I mean, I like to dress up, that's true, but this is so…"
"Because you have to find out if you are a male or a female, not on the outside, but on the inside where it counts the most. I talked to Dr. Benson and she told me that three months as a girl won't hurt you, and she is the one that let me use these items. Since she specializes in transgender cases I trust her judgement, and after I talked to her and she gave me these things, she said she wants to talk to you as well. Tomorrow you have an appointment at the salon in the morning and after lunch with Dr. Benson."
"Salon?"
"You certainly want to look your best don't you? After a trip to the salon you'll feel like a new person!"
I looked in the mirror and started to laugh. "New? This is the new me mother!"
After mom left the room I got dressed, reveling in the way my new clothes fit now. The panties were snug yet comfortable, the bra held my new breasts firmly, yet the low lacy cups let enough show that my cleavage was clearly evident. I did not need the waist nipper now that I had hips, but I wrapped it around myself anyway. I stepped into some shorts of my sisters and was surprised to see that they were actually loose on me. I wondered why mom was helping me, but as I have heard, 'never look a gift horse in the mouth', and I didn't. I just accepted what she had done for me.
That night mom told me that I would have to find a job to help pay for all of the things she had bought. After my stint at the salon there was no way I was going to become a boy again very soon. My hair had been permed in a loose wave and cut so that it tended to fall into place, my nails were now longer and filed to a rounded end. My eyebrows had been removed with tweezers, shaped into a nice arch. I walked out knowing that there wasn't any way someone would read me as male looking like this and relaxed, becoming that girl I had always wanted to become. I met with Dr. Benson, a modestly tall woman with dark hair and deep brown eyes, an easy smile came to her face and I relaxed as she and I talked about a range of things, from cars to colors to math and history.
"I think you'll be very happy as a woman Janet. Just call me if you need too, any time at all."
She gave me her card and I left the office and went home for the day. When I got there Megan was home. Her first reaction to me was a squeal, then a hug, followed by her looking me over from head to toe.
"Mom said we're going out tonight and for us to get dressed all fancy. Come on!"
Since I had taken over her room we both went in. I had a chance to yank her chain and knew something she didn't. I unbuttoned my blouse and took it off then facing away from her asked if she was going to get ready or what? Then I unhooked the bra and let it slip off my shoulders and fall to the floor, turned and bent at the waist to get the blouse, all the time smiling to myself because my own breasts were now hanging from my chest, something she could not miss.
"You got tits!" I turned to face her as I stood up, and slipped my panties to the floor and waited. Her gasp was worth it, it really was. "You… you've got…! Wait a minute! That's impossible!"
"No it isn't sister dear. This is me for at least three months, maybe more."
"I'll be damned!" was her only comment as she quickly stripped naked and we both started to get our outfits out of the closet. Megan is devious, and asked me if I wanted to shakeup mom, and when I said okay, she told me what she wanted to do.
When we stepped out of the room we both had on a short black skirt, nylons and heels, and a red satin blouse. Megan had two of them the same color from when she was in high school, and they fit us. Neither of us wore a bra, a minimum of makeup, and had our hair done to perfection. My skirt was pleated while hers was straight, but other than that we looked alike! Mom saw us and smiled until she saw that we were not wearing a bra. But we were old enough to make up our own minds and she said nothing. In the kaleidoscope of the last few days, my mind was reeling from all of the new sensations, and experiences. Now, with Megan and mom, I finally felt like I was exactly where I belonged. Being in public dressed as a girl was still new enough to me that once in a while a panic attack would take over and I would worry endlessly until I was back home. Now, with every step, my breasts would move, the lack of a bra clearly evident. Dinner was uneventful and we went back home.
Megan was beside herself at having a 'sister', and wanted to a lot of things together; she even invited me up to the college for the next weekend! Mom thought it was a good idea, so plans were made for me to go. For the entire week I tried on clothes, carefully selecting the three outfits I was going to take with me. Mom laughed at me, telling me it was just a weekend with my sister. But I knew better; Megan liked to party, so I expected to be dragged to at least one party, and had made sure I had something to wear to a party, like the short red dress I bought myself. It was short, with a flared skirt, a tight bodice, and a neckline cut low enough to stir up things. Megan was going to try and set me up of course, but that was the last step for me wasn't it? Have some guy lusting after you, and then, let him take you? I had never been attracted to men like that, but now I was beginning to see handsome men in a new light, and if Megan was going to set me up, I was going to let her!
I wore shorts and a top up to the college, and Megan helped me bring my things into her apartment and put them away.
"We're having a party tomorrow night Janet, I hope you brought something sexy to wear!"
"You'll find out." That night she and I, joined some other girls at the local pizza place for dinner. It was the first time I had been around that many girls, dressed as a girl, and I was shocked at the way they talked about the guys coming to the party! They sliced and diced them, parceled them out, and all of them had selected the guy they wanted to be with. Except me. I was the newcomer, and since I didn't know any of the guys they were talking about, my fate was up to chance.
"They never had a clue Janet, you were magnificent!"
"Why should they ever know? Are you going to tell them?"
"Hell no! I'm saying that you have become so feminine in so short a time that it's scary!"
"Thank you, now I'll go change." I slipped on a babydoll outfit and a thin white robe and we watched television for a while, and then went to bed.
Megan and I cleaned up her place, picked up the snacks, and so on, until four when I went into my room to get ready. I started with a bubblebath, soft, sweet, flower scented shampoo, and a very close shave. For this occasion I wore my best panties, the red, French cut thing panty with the thin lace insert right in the right spot. My makeup was perfect; I used the 'less is more' theory, and I looked as feminine as ever. The bra was also red, very thin and sheer, it let my nipples poke hard against the material, a clear sign of my new femininity. I pulled on the pantyhose and reached for the dress and slipped it over my head. I zipped it up and the thin jersey closed around me tightly, accenting my every curve. The hem was a good two inches above my knees and the skirt was tight over my ass as it tapered to my waist. The low cut front showed an impressive amount of cleavage, my boobs pushed up, out, and together, swelling against the neckline which drooped almost to the edge of the bra. It was short sleeved and I wore only a thin gold bracelet on my right wrist. I dabbed on some perfume in all of the right places, stepped into my red shoes, and traced the hot red lipstick on my lips. The small gold hoop earrings were my only other jewelry. I walked out of the room and saw Megan, very hot in her black dress. She looked at me and threw her hands up.
"So much for dividing the spoils Janet! After they see you the rest of us will be all alone!"
"Why do I doubt that Megan?"
The other girls arrived shortly, and we all seemed to be wary of the other. The competition examining each other, like good fighters do. Later, the men started to arrive, and most of the girls ended up with the guy of their choice. I was introduced to Mark, a tall blue eyed blond Adonis. His easy smile and soft manner drew me to him like a moth to the flame. He and I had walked out by the small pond when he kissed me, and it ignited a fire in me all at once. I felt his hand on my butt, squeezing as he kissed me.
"I live right over there Janet, why don't we go over there? It'll be quieter." Right. And I would be at his mercy. His lips on mine made up my mind, and I went in and grabbed my purse and told Megan where I was going. All she did was smile at me and tell me to have fun. I was on air as we walked to his place, knowing I was about to not just cross a threshold, but leap over it, and I wasn't nervous about it at all. As soon as we walked into his apartment I was in his arms, kissing him, and I felt the zipper of my dress go down. I shrugged my shoulders and it fell to the floor, leaving me in my panties and a bra, pantyhose and heels. I unbuttoned his shirt and his hard, hairy chest was so manly!
I was still there in the morning, wrapped around him in a tight embrace, his morning hardness pressing against me. My hand found him again, and like a new bride I urged his body forward until he once again pleased me. With my mouth full again, I went in the bath and got dressed, slipping out and back to Megan's place. I quickly showered, cleaned the panty, and put on my shorts and shaved, did my makeup and hair, pulled on a plain white bra and a top. I was all done by the time Megan stumbled out of her room, some guy right behind her.
"This is Jimmy. Jimmy, my sister Janet." He left soon after that, leaving Megan and I all alone.
"Not a soul knew Janet, and certainly Mark did not find out, which I find interesting as hell. Just how did you manage that?… never mind, I don't want to know!"
Just after lunch I went home, my future determined that very weekend. I was lucky in a lot of ways, Mark was just one of them.
© 2000
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