Jay’s Pageant
by: Janell Stevens

 

Chapter 1: Introduction

Jay walked the runway one last time to give the judges a final look before marking their ballots, and then returned to center stage with the other two finalists. The graceful feminine walk and turn at the end of the catwalk were the result of hours of practice under the strict instruction of his mother and some of her girlfriends. Without thinking, Jay reached down with his well-manicured hands and gently raised the hem of his skirt ever so slightly to navigate the steps up from the catwalk to the main stage level. As he waived to his mother and friend Kellie in the audience, it was obvious that his underarms had been shaved for the sleeveless gown. Even with the audience applause as a distraction, the walk and hand gestures all seemed second nature, just like any other accomplished beauty pageant contestant.

How did a scrawny 17 year old boy wind up on stage in front of his entire hometown in a blue, strapless, beaded evening gown with a slit on the right that stopped just below the waist, revealing his long smooth nylon-clad legs, strappy 4 inch heels, and pink toenails with each graceful measured step?

For some strange reason Jay began to cry as his friend Cynthia announced the pageant results, reflecting on the events of the last two months, all the result of a simple misunderstanding and possibly some wishful thinking on the part of his mother. She naturally assumed that her pretty effeminate son with few friends, and little interest in girls or sports, was the one stealing her make up and dressing in her clothes when she wasn’t at home. She even thought his reluctant participation in the pageant was a subtle ploy to express his femininity, despite the fact that she had to pressure him into entering the pageant after receiving a call from the drama teacher at his school. Jay was merely covering for his girlfriend, who came by each afternoon to visit him while his mother was at work. He had no idea that she had been regularly going through his mother’s things when she visited.

For his part, Jay thought it would all be over that evening when the pageant winner was announced, but he had no idea the degree to which his femininity had been internalized by two months of behavior modification and intense hormone therapy that would continue without his knowledge or consent. In fact, his mother had found a sympathetic doctor who was willing to help the ‘confused’ boy with the difficult transition to womanhood. The picture album from the pageant and his weeks of practice would serve to document the success of his ‘real life test’, necessary to satisfy the physician before she would agree to anything drastic like breast implants or an irreversible orchidectomy. Even if it wasn’t exactly consensual at this point, Jay made such a pretty young lady, so why wouldn’t he be much happier as a real woman, his mother thought.

Maybe the estrogen shots were to blame for his recent moodiness, as well as the slight physical changes, imperceptible at first. His hips had widened some despite the rigorous diet and weight loss, and he was already developing his own small breasts, which Jay discounted as the result of being forced to regularly wear a bra. Wearing the constricting undergarment with the underwire must simply be molding his boy’s chest, he thought. It will certainly go away as soon as mother stops forcing the boy to wear bras. At the current massive dosage, however, it was certain that he would never develop much in the way of facial or body hair. In fact he was at the perfect age for a smooth transition to manufactured womanhood.

Back at center stage, Jay’s first reaction was to clinch hands with the other two pageant finalists, Jessica (John) and Michelle (Mike). Despite the tense situation, Jay noticed how feminine the other contestant’s hands looked clinched in his own, especially Michelle’s. Jessica was strikingly beautiful with her long shapely legs revealed by the short evening gown she was wearing, but to some degree the illusion was lost when you realized that she was well over 6 ft tall, even without the size 12 black patent high heeled pumps. In fact she dwarfed both Jay and Michelle in all respects, more like a typical campy drag queen.

Despite taking the time to actually shave his legs, Jay had noticed in the dressing room that Jessica was wearing white men’s briefs under his pantyhose. There were obvious limits to what he would do to win a car. Jay was convinced that it was true for him as well.

The other finalist, Michelle, though not as pretty as Jessica or Jay, was by far the most convincing pageant contestant. It was hard to believe that this beautiful girl standing there was the same Mike that Jay had known since first grade. Mike, or Michelle, now looked so much like his three beautiful older sisters that Jay remembered from school. If Jay couldn’t win the car, then she hoped it would be Michelle. Once the star athlete in elementary school and junior high, Mike had the misfortune of peaking physically by the age of twelve.

Most girls go through a tomboy phase, but Michelle went from being the largest boy in his elementary school class to now one of the smallest, standing only 5’ 5" without her size 7, 3-inch high heels. Her slight build and lack of body or facial hair didn’t help either. Jay remembered that Mike was quite wild in Junior High, getting into all kinds of trouble at school and with the police. Once in high school, though, his interests suddenly switched from girls and team sports to gymnastics, dance, and the arts when his body failed to keep up with his classmates, which now afforded Michelle a certain grace that was lacking in most of the other contestants, and many girls his age for that matter.

Michelle’s floor length gown was a bit more modest than either Jessica’s or Jay’s, with a simple walking slit in the back that extended to the knee, revealing her shapely legs and dramatic high heels. Michelle’s cleavage, however, was amazing. In fact, Jay could swear that Michelle’s breasts were real after seeing her strip down to her slip in the dressing room backstage during a costume change, and she was the only other contestant besides himself that wore a gaff and no hip padding. On close inspection Jay could tell that her ears were obviously pierced with a pair of diamond studs, a bit much for a onetime event he thought, but Jay’s ears were pierced as well.

Michelle had obviously been well coached by his mother and older sisters, Jay thought. It had probably been five years since they last spoke despite going to the same school, but now she had so much in common with Jay. Michelle was just as emotionally shaken by the moment. Cynthia, the pageant MC and head cheerleader, dressed in a black tuxedo in the spirit of the contest, announced to the crowd that Jessica (a.k.a. John) was the second runner up and she exited the stage with a bouquet of roses in hand, leaving Michelle and Jay clinched in a nervous embrace.

"This is what we have been waiting for. Both of the contestants are certainly quite deserving, so let’s give them a final round of applause. The first runner up and winner of the CD/DVD system is Michelle, and in first place, winner of the new car is Jay." And with the announcement, the audience came to its feet giving the contestants a standing ovation, as Jay was presented with a bouquet of roses and Michelle and Cynthia placed a tiara on her head. With the crown in place, Michelle handed Jay a tissue to catch her tears before ruining the makeup. To the audience this all seemed to be part of the pageant irony in having boys emulate girls in the most objectifying of all events, a beauty pageant, but this was not the case. Jay made one last trip down the runway to the adoration of the crowd before retiring backstage.

This all began when Jay’s dad passed away six years earlier just as his parents had separated to begin divorce proceedings over his recurring infidelity, leaving just his mother. Despite the tragedy, his mom had a small but growing law practice that afforded them a comfortable lifestyle. However, Jay, now a highschool senior, lacked the direction of a strong male figure in his life. In fact his mother often discouraged rough and tumble play even before his father had died, possibly compensating for her failed relationships with men. It was a way perhaps of ensuring that the boy would never leave her. Instead of being a star athlete like his father before him, Jay excelled in the Speech and Drama, and was a major feature in his school’s annual dramatic production and an excellent student.

Small for his age, standing 5’ 7", he appeared a bit frail, suffering from severe debilitating allergies that required weekly shots to control. This only served to keep him under her total control to limit his physical activity. With some practice, his mom had grown quite proficient at giving his shots at home. Jay’s mom became suspicious of his behavior early in his high school career, because his friends were almost exclusively girls.

Her natural inclination was to assume that he might be gay, but lots of boys are a bit effeminate as kids, but it doesn’t usually last well into their early teen years. Instead of trying to curb his feminine behavior as a father might do, she often encouraged it by restricting his physical activities and encouraging his more girlish interests. For instance, she forbid him to participate in rough sports and even found a way to have him excused from taking PE classes for ‘medical reasons’, thinking she was protecting her baby from humiliation and ridicule in the boy’s locker room. She also controlled his appearance and forbid him from wearing jeans to school, only khakis or slacks. Eventually these restrictions and his somewhat effeminate behavior began to isolate him from most of the boys his age in high school.

Despite his mother’s efforts, Jay was far more masculine than she recognized. In fact, he had a secret girlfriend named Kellie who was in his grade at school and lived just a few blocks away. Knowing that his mother and even Kellie’s parents would never approve of their relationship, he would secretly invite her over to his house on afternoons and evenings when his mother was not at home, making out and practicing some heavy petting.

One thing Jay didn’t know, however, was that Kellie often slipped into his mother’s room and borrowed a few of her personal things, such as make-up and other girlish items that her strict religious parents thought she was far too young to have. What was the harm, Jay’s mom had so many beautiful things?

His mother first became a bit suspicious when her favorite shade of lipstick and matching nail polish disappeared from her vanity with no explanation. Sure, she might have put the lipstick in her purse only to lose it at some point during the busy day, but she would never put nail polish in her purse, having learned that lesson the hard way by ruining several handbags. About that time she found a soda can in Jay’s room with an obvious lipstick stain in a shade she recognized.

On another occasion, she was sure that she had a pair of thigh-high sheer black stockings at the bottom of her lingerie drawer, still in the store wrapper, that just disappeared. She was somewhat less certain about the frequent disappearance of several pairs of her every day pantyhose in various shades and styles. It seemed like she was always stopping to buy a new pair of pantyhose for work. Kellie’s mom would still have her wearing knee socks and Mary Jane’s to school if they could.

And then there were all of those women’s magazines like Vogue and Cosmo, and clothing catalogs that she found hidden underneath his bed, also courtesy of Kellie who hid them in Jay’s room so that her parents wouldn’t find them. She could understand the boy looking at the pictures of beautiful women in these high-fashion magazines, as such magazines were more readily available to someone his age than Playboy or Penthouse, but the prom edition of Modern Bride was a bit harder to rationalize. Usually she would simply put them back where she found them, because she didn’t want him to know that she had violated his privacy by searching his room. On one occasion she found a copy of Cosmo out on his desk and asked where he got it, but something about needing the pictures for a school project was the best explanation he could offer. He could only imagine how furious his mom would be if she came home early one afternoon and caught he and Kellie making out in his bedroom, because she was so old-fashioned about such things. In addition Kellie’s parents would surely punish her severely if they found out. Jay’s mom used incredible restraint in not confronting the boy about her missing items or the other women’s magazines stashed under his bed.

In addition to her petty larceny and the magazines, Kellie also left a few additional clues of her presence, but since she and Jay were virtually the same size, there was still little evidence to suggest that these items weren’t actually Jay’s. One time his mother discovered a simple pair of pink cotton panties in her drier after washing his sheets. For some reason she let such incidents fuel her active imagination. In addition to the make up and stockings, she could swear that some of her lingerie had disappeared, and then miraculously reappeared a few days later with no explanation. In fact there was one time when Kellie found her short pink nightgown and tried it on as part of their adolescent sexual experimentation, only to put it in the dirty clothes hamper rather than returning it to the drawer where she found it. For a single mother living alone with her son, there could be no simple explanation for these events. She soon thought Jay was to blame for every run or snag that she found in her pantyhose and every stain she found on a blouse or dress, but she didn’t have the resolve to confront him. He would certainly come to her for support if anything were bothering him, she thought. Was there something he wasn’t telling her?

 

 

 

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© 2001 by Janell Stevens. All Rights Reserved. These documents (including, without limitation, all articles, text, images, logos, compilation design) may printed for personal use only. No portion of these documents may be stored electronically, distributed electronically, or otherwise made available without express written consent of the copyright holder.