Inconsistent                           by Janet L. Stickney                       JanetLynn17@Hotmail.com

 

Discontent is the first step to change, all you have to do is act on it

Andy

Inconsistent, inaccurate, and inept. That's how I feel about my dressing. I can never seem to do it the same way twice. I usually wear the wrong things or do my makeup badly, and of course, trying to do anything but a ponytail is out of the question. So far, every time I tried to do my best, I felt like a clown. I was disheartened and disillusioned because I wanted to be able to dress, look, and live as a girl. Of course the odds were against me ever succeeding. I'm 17, not too tall and a bit but pudgy. I have reddish brown hair with blue eyes. My name is Andy Grant. I have an older sister, but she's away at school, leaving just my parents and I. Because of my inability to have anything I would call success when I tried dressing up, I fell into a depression. The vision in my mind simply could not be realized, and the more I tried the worse it got. I became moody and sloppy, which drove my parents nuts, but I didn't know how to get myself out of the never ending cycle of desire vs. ugly reality.

As school drew to a close, my grade point average started to collapse, which only drove me further into my depression. Mom tried to find out why, but how could I tell her? My inner desire to be more feminine in every way ran counter to everything she knew about males and our role in society. She was not unaware of the phenomenon of course, but it was "those people over there who do that". How could I tell her that "over there" was alive and well in her own house? And what about my dad? He would freak out. Three weeks before the end of the year, everything came to a head, erupting in a burst of tears and angry, ugly words.

"Andrew, I want you to tell me why your grades have fallen so much! You've been an absolute terror since the first of the year, moody, sloppy, curt, even nasty at times! Tell me what's going on. Maybe we can help."

I was sitting at my computer desk as mom looked at me, her normally beautiful face screwed into one of bewilderment and anger.

"You wouldn't understand."

"This cannot go on young man. You tell me what's bothering you, and I mean right now!" Her red tipped finger was pointed at me, her other hand clenched in an unfamiliar fist, her beautiful blues eyes, now a stormy gray, had narrowed and her mouth became a mere slit, red in her anger, tight with frustration. I had seen her this way only once before, when Beth got pregnant in high school.

"No."

"Yes!" She grabbed my arm and spun me around, coming face to face with me, our noses just inches apart, her eyes glaring and stern. "I'm not giving you a choice Andrew, I'm telling you!"

Her anger and my frustration clashed and grew hot, yet I remained silent.

As her hand grew tighter on my arm I also grew angry. My secret was mine and mine alone, and by her insisting that I tell her, she provoked my long held anger at my failures. Her slap wasn't all that hard, but it sent the message that she was serious. In a fit of anger and stupidity I blurted it out.

"Okay! You want to know? Well I want to be a girl!"

Those few words shocked her so much that she flopped down on the bed, her eyes widening as she stared at me. Silence reigned as we glared at each other, both of us lost in the implications of what I had said. My self imposed silence was broken, shattering my self esteem even as I held my head up in prideful anger. Mom sat there silent as she stared at me, her face still showing the shock of what I had said. For what seemed like hours all we did was look at each other, until she suddenly stood up.

"We'll talk about this after I think about it some more Andrew, but in the mean time I want this crabby attitude of yours to stop. Understand?"

I nodded my head yes and she went to the door, opened it, started to walk out, then stopped and turned to face me.

"I'll bet you would be quite pretty all fixed up right Andrew", then she left! On that note I sank deeper into the chair, my foolish, angry outburst had let her in on my secret, leaving me open to ridicule and possibly worse from my father. The tears started to swell in my eyes, dripping down my cheeks until at last the flood gates opened and I started sobbing. I was unable to face the truth, scared that my desire, so well hidden for so long was now in the open. I could only guess what would happen next.

I lay on my bed for a long time trying to reconcile myself to a sure and certain punishment of some kind. Dad was a man that while unbending in so many ways, was not an intolerant man about minorities, but this was in his own house, his own son this time. I knew what his view of what I wanted would be. He would never understand me, and probably not even try. My best hope was that he would stay silent about my revelation, a kind of tacit approval. Just before he came home mom came to my room and sat on the bed next to me.

"It's been hard to hide a secret like this hasn't it?"

I nodded my head as I felt her hand on my back, gently rubbing back and forth. "I'll bet that you never get it right. Would you like to try again? I'll help you."

I stayed silent while my mind tried to absorb and make sense of what she had said.

"Well, do you?"

My mind screamed 'Yes' while I stayed silent.

"I do have some experience you know."

Of course she did. I started to giggle, a nervous giggle that turned into another round of sobbing. Embarrassed at my lack of control I said nothing. "I'll take that as a yes. We'll see what we can do to make you into a girl."

Her weight left the bed, then her footsteps sounded as she walked out, closing the door behind herself.

Nothing was said at dinner that night, all seemed normal, and afterwards I went to my room. I tried to sleep, but visions of my mother laughing at me kept haunting my dreams. By the morning I was still tired after a restless night, yet also, excited. Mom came in and told me that Saturday would be the day. The bigger question was how would this all end? I could only hope for the best.

Mom

My name is Audrey Grant. I'm Andy's mother. His revelation yesterday shocked me right to the core, making me lay awake that night as I went over every single day of his life, trying to figure out what I did wrong. I grew up in the seventies so I knew about people that wore the clothes of the other sex of course, and I had even met a few. But this was my son! Not once, not even at Halloween did he ever express any desire to dress as a girl, so why now? Had he managed to keep his secret even back then? I'm 37, not so old that I don't understand Gays and so on; I went to school with a boy that said he was Gay. Benny seemed okay and I accepted him, so why do I feel so ashamed that Andy told me he wants to be a girl? I mean, it's only clothing, right? He was right about his father though, Bill won't have a clue, and won't try to get one either. As a plumber he works with his hands in a good profession, but he grew up poor and never had the chance to meet anyone that wasn't just like him. He had hoped that Andy would follow him into the trade, but it has been obvious for quite a while that Andy had no inclination that way. He wants to be a writer.

I slept badly that night as I wondered how I could get Andy to open up to me, maybe let me help him, but the specter of his father in a rage loomed when my mind drifted to a vision of Andy all dressed up. Andy is like his sister Beth in many ways, same eye color, same pudgy body, about the same height, Andy even has hair that went down his back, just like Beth. I had to find a way to tell Bill, and make him understand what had to be done. Andy is on the verge of some kind of breakdown, and if dressing as a girl even once relieves the stress on him, then I have to find a way to help Andy, and get his fathers blessing.

Dad

I'm Bill, Andy's dad. When Audrey told me what Andy wanted to do, I'll admit that my first reaction was to beat my son until he couldn't stand up, before I calmed down that is. Audrey has a way of making me pay attention to her without raising her voice. When she told me that she had known for almost a week, I was irate because she and I never keep secrets from each other. Her voice, that same soft contralto of hers, quavered only once as she told me what she wanted to do. She said that Andy needed to try it at least once, just to see himself as a girl, and if it went well, maybe a bit more, like a trip outside of the house. That scared me because of the neighbors. They might see my son, all dressed up as a girl. I could only imagine what he would look like! A clown in a dress! Audrey said this is important to him, very important. She also pointed out that I accepted the situation when Beth was pregnant and this is no different! I was angry at Beth of course, a baby at her age! But as she grew larger I became protective of her, like a...grandfather. When she gave the baby away I was saddened I guess. I had gotten used to the idea that she was going to be a mother. Now Andy. According to Audrey, if I said no he'll just graduate, move away, and do it on his own. This way at least we'll have some control. I hated the idea of my son dressing as a girl, but letting him do this on his own and possibly get into trouble was worse. I gave in, but with serious concerns. Audrey told me what she wanted me to do and when, then she told me not to be there. It sounded like I was hiding from my own son!

"On Saturday morning you and I are going to make you over into the girl of your dreams Andrew. Don't make any plans for this weekend. Okay?"

"Su...sure mom."

Andy

I had to wait three very long days for Saturday to arrive. Tense does not describe how I felt when the fateful day arrived. As soon as dad went to work, mom took me to her room, insisting that this was a "do it right or not at all session", and had me strip to my briefs. After she rubbed in a cream, I had to wait a bit, then in the shower, all of my sparse body hair washed down the drain! With my hair squeaky clean, a fresh shave, and a hairless body, I wrapped a towel around myself and rejoined mom. In a swirl of compressed time, I was wearing panties with my hair in rollers. She took the time to carefully get me dressed, and the results were worth the effort. My nervousness left me as soon as she began to put in the rollers, and from then on I was a more than willing subject, but said nothing about how I felt.

"This is foundation. I'm going to show you how to do it on myself, then you do yourself."

Under her watchful eye I covered my whole face evenly. I had never used the powder, but as I brushed away the excess I could see how it made my skin look softer and smoother. The eyeshadow was a lot harder. I used a thin line of soft green, then a plum color over that. Using the liquid eyeliner was the worst! It took me two tries to get it even close! In the end I rested my elbow on the table and managed to draw the thin black line on each eye with a single stroke. Under my eyes I used a black pencil. When I looked in the mirror, I was simply shocked. I had never managed to do this!

"Now we'll get some clothes on you Andy."

While I watched her, mom opened a bag and put some clothes on the bed.

"Beth wore this when she was in high school. I guess it's your turn."

I took it in my hand, felt the rods built into it and looked at mom.

"It's called a waist nipper Andrew. Wrap it around yourself and fasten the hooks in the front, the tag to the top."

As soon as I had it hooked and zipped up, my waist was at least a few inches smaller while my upper chest seemed to swell up! The bra was one of Beth's, a 34A. It was peach in color with lace trimmed cups that didn't look like much, but mom said it would be fine. As soon as I had it on I saw why. The cups had some pads in them that pushed up my flabby chest creating what looked like breasts!

"Push these in under yourself Andrew."

The small oval shaped pads lifted my flesh while filling out the cups of the bra, making it look like I had boobs! I sat on the bed and pulled on the pantyhose, the nylon slicking across my now hairless skin making me shiver, and sent the wrong message to my manhood. Embarrassed, I turned away from mom and hid things. She said nothing about it, but smiled at me.

"I think these will fit Andrew" mom said as she handed me the skirt. It was short, green and white checked, pleated all of the way around. I stepped into it and fastened the button and zipped it up. It fell about mid thigh on me. The blouse was white with short sleeves and a round collar. I quickly put it on and tucked it into the skirt, then pulled the soft tan sweater over my head, being careful of the rollers.

The shoes were black with short heels, and new.

"I bought them for you the other day. I hope they fit."

They did. It was my first time in heels, yet I had no trouble walking or standing in them at all!

"Now we do your hair and finish your makeup."

I sat as mom began to take the rollers out. My hair is quite long, so mom did it like Beth wears her hair. She cut my bangs, brushing out the top in a curly mass, then brushed it out and let it hang down my back and used barrettes to hold up, and back, some of the hair she had brushed out. When she was done, she handed me a blusher, then a soft red lipstick.

Gold clip on earrings, a gold bracelet and necklace.

"I think you can see the whole girl now Andrew. Stand over here.

Allowed at last to look in the full mirror, I was shocked. From the top of my head down to my pointy heels, there was no sign that I was male. Two hours it had taken. From the hair removal to makeup and hair, then, the clothes. Peach panties and bra, the pantyhose that made my legs look so long and sexy, the short skirt. Earrings in shiny gold swung from my earlobes, a pendant between my breasts, pushing down, accenting the swelling twin mounds of my breasts.

In all of the times that I have been secretly dressing up, at last I had the chance to go all of the way, not just hair, makeup, or the occasional effort to slip on a dress. Everything I have on is Beth's, but all of the clothes fit me reasonably well.

"I was right. You do make a pretty girl Andrew!"

It was all I could do to tear myself away from the mirror and look at her.

I'm 5'7" with soft reddish hair that sweeps well past my shoulders, the curls held back on the sides with barrettes, bangs that fall to my eyebrows. My face is small, oval in shape with eyes now almond shaped, accented by the black eyeliner. I let my hands run down my body, starting at my breasts. They swelled out to a full A cup, small but nice, then down a tapering bodice to the flaring skirt. Whenever I spin around the skirt flares out revealing long, nylon clad legs. All at once I felt the relief I always wanted. The girl in the mirror was the girl I always wanted to be. She was, to me anyway, beautiful beyond words. Not a clown in any sense, this girl was the proverbial girl next door, and I was the girl. I was unable to stop looking in the mirror, my grin plastered on my face like a child with a new toy, my excitement clear. All at once I wanted to leave the house, go shopping for another outfit, walk the mall and sit and have a soft drink while letting everyone see and admire me; but I lacked the courage. I was more than content to be dressed, stand at the mirror, and simply look at her. Abbie. It's the name I picked for her. Abigail Elizabeth Grant. Lost in the vision I was seeing, I realized that mom was talking to me. "How about some lunch?" She took my hand and we walked down the stairs and into the kitchen, made a sandwich and poured some iced tea. Sitting at the table, I slowly ate my lunch slowly, savoring the feeling of such openness, enjoying each minute. We washed up the dishes and I went in the small bath, retracing my lips with fire engine red lipstick, two coats. I was in absolute heaven as I looked at my reflection.

Lost in my euphoria at the sight of myself in the mirror, I did not hear the door slowly open. As I stood there admiring the way I looked, mom asked me if I had selected a name for the girl standing there. More than slightly nervous at admitting that I had gone so far as to pick out a name for myself, I hesitated for the barest moment.

"Tell me Andrew".

"Ah,...Abigail...Elizabeth"

"That's a very pretty name. Abigail Elizabeth. I like that!" she said smiling. "I know that you said you had never been out of the house, so why not now? Come with me. I have a few errands to run anyway, and you can see what it's like."

My euphoria evaporated instantly with the thought of leaving the house, but mom merely looked at me, waiting for an answer.

"Are you afraid to talk, even to me?"

"No"

I croaked, my long practiced, softly feminine voice, deserting me, just when I needed it the most.

"Since you can't seem to find a way to say anything I'll take that as a yes."

My eyes still wide at the thought of leaving the house, she asked,

"Do you have a purse?"

"Yes" came the squeaky answer.

"Go get it, and put your wallet and lipstick in it, then come back here. I'll be waiting." I tried, but I was stuck. I simply could not make myself move. "Well?"

"I'm scared."

"Don't be afraid dear. Go get your purse and I'll wait here."

It was a command, and like a little child, I did what she told me to do, just like I always did.

The moment I returned she took my arm.

"I think it's time the world got a chance to see just how pretty you are.

Don't you?"

No matter how hard I tried, I was unable to say no. I was fighting my impulse to run and hide, against my desire to experience being a female, at least once, outside of the house.

"Let me straighten my hair a bit and we'll go."

In moments she was done, then, with no struggle, I let her walk me to the car. As mom drove along, she said nothing more until she drove into the lot and parked the car.

"I won't force you to go in Abbie, but we both know that this is exactly what you want to do, but are afraid. Am I right?"

I had sweat running down my back, my forehead was damp and my hands were shaking even as I said yes.

"I'll be with you the whole time, and I think that unless you do this now you will always regret it, and you will never find the nerve to be the girl you want to be or do anything else even remotely daring."

She took my chin in her hand and looked at me.

"Are you coming?" My voice was squeaky, filled with dread, but I croaked out another yes. She stood outside the car waiting as I unfolded myself and also stood outside the car. With a click of her remote, she locked the doors. I was committed now, right or wrong.

I walked next to her the whole time, trying to match her step and arm movements. My only fault, which she corrected me on immediately, was that I hung my head.

"Don't hang your head Abbie. People will think you have something to hide."

I did have something to hide, but held my head up anyway, then we walked in. The grocery was packed with people, and after I had the cart mom went about putting things into it. For over an hour we went up and down the aisles as she selected the groceries for the week while I pushed the cart. I saw two girls from my class with their mothers, and I know they saw me, but neither of them gave any sign that they knew who I was, and went on as if nothing was wrong. I was a wreck inside, waiting for the inevitable shout, and while it never came, I did not relax until mom and I were safely back in the car.

"I told you that you would have no trouble and I was right, wasn't I Abigail?"

"I saw two girls I know from school" I blurted it out, expecting some sympathy, all she did was smile at me and said nothing.

We put the groceries away, almost finishing when mom told me that she and I were going to make dinner together that night.

"I picked up some nice steaks. I'll start while you set the table...for four."

I stopped cold in my tracks and stared at her.

"Beth and your father, you and I of course!"

"I'll go change then." I started to leave when she said

"No. I want you just as you are. Your father knows..."

"You mean dad knows about this!?"

My heart leapt into my throat again as a vision of my dying a slow, agonizing death came to mind.

"Of course he knows. I told him, we talked about it, and decided that you were headed for a nervous breakdown if you didn't find some kind of relief."

All I could mutter was, "dad agreed to this?"

"Yes, but to be honest about it, your father is at a loss. He doesn't understand why you, or any male, would want to be a woman. He's convinced that you'll still look like a boy in a dress, which is absurd of course. But, he loves you, and together, we have decided to give you that chance. It's up to you. As far as Beth goes, your father is talking to her about it today. How she'll accept it, I don't know, but I'm sure she will try."

When mom first saw me I wanted to die on the spot, crawl into the smallest hole I could find, and stay there. Now, she was giving me the chance I always dreamed of and wondered about. If I said no, I would always wonder if I made the right choice. If I said yes, I would have no choice but to live the truth, no matter what it was. I would have to admit that I liked to dress as a girl, a young woman, and be strong enough to stay the course and be sure it was right, or wrong, for me. If I said no, I would condemn myself to a life of turmoil and doubt. It was extremely hard, yet somehow easy at the same time.

"Dad knows? Really?"

She nodded her head yes and took my hand in hers, closing it around mine.

"If you can't do this now, with your family, how can you possibly think that you can do it later? I will not force you, but it would be a mistake not to at least try."

With my minds eye picturing dad's rage at me, it was hard to see him accepting me this way, but mom said he would, so I slowly nodded my head yes.

"Okay then. Finish setting the table and start on the salad while I work on the meat."

Half an hour before Beth and Dad were to be there I went with mom to her room where I touched up my lipstick, then she added some perfume to my wrists and neck. If I had one I would have used a magnifying glass on myself. I spent plenty of time looking at myself to make sure I looked as good as possible. When we heard the door open she told me to stay there and not to come down until she called for me. Nervous does not do justice to the way I felt. It seemed like an eon passed before mom called out my name.

"Okay Abigail, you can come down now."

I could shoot myself too. It might be the same thing, but it was now or never. Now was the only option.

My heels clicked on the hardwood floors as I stepped down and walked into the familyroom. Beth saw me first, her mouth opened but no sound came out. Dad also stood up, the look on his face one of stunned disbelief. His vision of me was clownish, kind of like my own, the reality totally different.

"Damn! I think I'll just go back to school!"

Her eyes wide, a smile creasing her face, Beth held out her hand to me and I took it. Dad stared at me, his eyes roving from my head to my feet and back.

"I...I..."

"Your father is in shock for the moment Abigail."

"No, I'm...well, yes. I am in shock! I never thought that Andy could look so...or be so...you know what I mean!"

The disbelief on his face was still there even as his eyes never left me. I sat next to Beth on the couch, just as demurely as I could, my knees locked firmly together. It was correct, but it also helped keep me from shaking so much.

We all sat looking at each other, until mom broke the silence.

"Do you want to become a female? Or do you just like to dress up once in a while?"

In my dreams I had wondered what it was like to be a female, to hold a man in my arms, let him take me to his bed, be a mother, get pregnant, then raise children. The lure of everything feminine drew me in like a moth to the flame, yet, I didn't know the answer to her question. If I did, it was hidden, deep in my mind, unwilling to tell even me.

"Well"?

"I don't know."

Her hand touched my arm, gentle, yet caring. Then she dropped her bombshell.

"Maybe you should find out. Maybe you should experience what it means to be a young woman. I mean live, work, date, all as a young woman. Truly bring Abigail to life."

My heart was swelling with the very thought of what she suggested. I could live out my fantasy! I could be the girl I wanted to be, the one I had dreamed of for so long! Then the crashing reality of it came down on me. Visions of laughter and pointed fingers, taunts and hatred rose up and squeezed my heart. Before I could even put words to it, dad spoke up.

"You all know how I feel about this. I had hoped that you would follow me into the trades Andy...Abigail, but I've known for a long time that isn't for you. Maybe this is, I don't know. Women nowadays can have good careers I guess, and I have to admit that you look very nice. Not at all what I expected. If we agree to let you dress as a girl it has to be all or none. That means there will be no exceptions... Abigail. Family outings, work, day or night. Are you willing to do that?"

With no exceptions, dressing as a girl would be very hard on all of us, especially dad and I. It was time to pay the Piper so to speak. I looked at dad who sat there staring at me, no expression on his face. I wished he would give me a sign, something to go by. Finally, I said "Yes".

His face never changed, yet I felt his disappointment anyway.

Dinner was pleasant after all. Dad never mentioned how I was dressed, what he expected of me or anything else. I knew, and he knew that I already knew, so why bother? Beth however was acting so antsy that she could hardly keep it in. Mom, Beth, and I did the dishes, then we all watched television until it was time to go to bed. That night I slept in a nightgown for the first time. I had, in a single day, opened up and admitted my secret to my family, shown them how I looked, and hurt my father. Did I win anything? His love was important to me because without it I was half a person. And what about Beth? She was all smiles and friendly, but she could be a real bitch when she wanted to be. Smiles aside, she was quite capable of hurting me big time. Keep in mind that I had worn her clothes that day. I'm sure she didn't mind, but...

In the morning I tried doing my makeup and hair, then put on clean panties, that padded pantybrief and bra. The bra I had was the new Pushemup brand. They pushed my chest up and into the cups, which I padded with small bits of foam. My breasts were small, but almost all me and I was proud of them. I pulled on my own white shorts and a tee, then white ankle socks and my gym shoes. A dash of lipstick, then I went to the kitchen. Mom was there with dad. They both looked at me, neither of them smiled, but then, they didn't frown either.

"You look very nice this morning."

His voice sounded like a truck on a bad gravel road, making me scared again. Then he smiled at me.

"I thought about this a lot last night. When I saw you for the first time yesterday, everything I expected to see was wrong. Maybe I'm wrong about a lot of other things as well. I can't say I'm happy about you wearing girls clothes, but we'll try it and see how it goes. Okay?"

My emotions were still at the surface and I went to him and hugged him as tight as I could. I felt his tears on my face as my own fell on his shirt. Mom waited, then we all ate breakfast. Later, when Beth showed up, she ate a quick bite then helped me clean the house.

When we were done mom said, "since you have decided to be a girl, let's have another fun day and get you a few more things to expand your wardrobe."

I nodded my head yes while Beth said she was going to come along. On the way out of the house to go shopping again, Beth gave Dad a kiss on the cheek. He looked at me, wondering I know, if I would do the same. I did, then ran out to join Beth and mom, leaving him with two different lipstick prints on his cheek.

The first place she took me was Sares, where she bought a dozen panties in assorted colors, two bras in 34A, a tan padded pantybrief, and a waist nipper in white. From there, we bought two dresses, two skirts, two blouses, a sundress and a suit, then shoes. White and black heels, taupe and white flats. Then I had my ears pierced. We stopped for lunch, then we went home.

"Hang up or put away the clothes Abbie. You have two weeks left in school yet. Maybe between now and then you would like to repaint your bedroom. You and I can get some different drapes and bed spread as well."

Before I could answer her, dad walked in.

"I've given this a lot of thought, and made some decisions. Since you think you want to be a female, no later than the day after you are out of school for the summer, you are to get your hair styled with a permanent. You can't wear any of your male clothes at all, at any time, no matter what, and slacks are out. Also, you have to have a job by the end of the month. Any questions?"

Beth's well known bitchiness came to mind, so I mentioned it.

"Beth said she thought it was okay, but she thinks you're weird anyway. When I reminded her that she was the only girl in her class to have a baby, she shut right up. I'll take her back to school tomorrow, and remind her how it is. If she doesn't like it she can pay for her own school. Is that good enough?"

I nodded my head yes and dad left the room.

"I told you he would come around didn't I?"

"Ya but he hates it mom. I'm going against everything he believes in about men."

"He'll get over that too Abbie, be patient."

During the two weeks I had left in school, mom and I picked out a color for my room, which was a light green by the way, and I painted while mom altered the new drapes. Mom and I talked about my impending change every day. I didn't think I was ready, but she insisted that the only way to get ready is to do it. I mentioned the other kids in the neighborhood, and all she did was tell me I had to cross that bridge alone.

I wondered how I was going to keep from getting killed, but the die was cast. I was about to become a girl, for the entire summer. The day before school let out, dad brought home a small vanity. He and I set it up in my room, then, after he left, I emptied my shoebox of cosmetics into it. On the day school let out I went home and changed clothes, did my best as I put on my makeup, brushed out my hair and put it in a ponytail. Mom asked me, "How about getting your hair cut and styled today Abbie? We can surprise your dad."

"Okay mom."

By the time I left the salon, my hair had been cut, shaped and styled into a shorter pageboy, curly down the back, wavy on the top with bangs swept to one side, but no perm. Mom said I should learn how to do my hair without a perm. My makeup had been redone by a pro, my eyebrows tweezed and my nails filed and redone in a softer red polish. I never looked, or felt, so feminine before. I was on cloud nine as I saw myself for the first time when they were done. Every trace of my old male self had been taken away, and if any of the women that worked on me knew, or figured out I was really a male, they said nothing. Mom waited for me, and when we were done she and I went home.

She followed me to my room, watching as I hung up the clothes, then put things in my dresser.

"Lets talk Abbie."

While not a command, I let her lead me to the den.

"This dressing up of yours was a shock to both of us. Why didn't you tell us before now? We would have made an effort to understand. Both your father and I thought this was just some kind of experimentation, but now of course, we know that it's a lot more than that."

Mom looked at me, her soft blue eyes showing concern, but not hate.

"I couldn't tell you mom. I wasn't that sure myself."

She nodded her head, then told me we were going out to dinner that night.

"I won't make you go Abigail, but we're going, and we want you to be with us. Maybe you can help your father find a way for both of you to get what you both want and need."

The memory of how I looked in the salon came to me but I hesitated.

"Does Dad know about this dinner tonight?"

"No, but he hasn't seen you all dressed up and out in public either."

"He's not going to like this at all mom!"

"He has no choice Abbie. Sooner or later he'll be out with you, so we might as well start now. Now, why don't you change and let's go have a nice dinner."

"Okay mom".

"Wear that new black dress we bought, and if you need any help, call me."

In my room I took off the red skirt and my blouse, careful about my hair, then put on the padded pantybrief and waist nipper. The black dress was a sheath, that I could see fit like it was made for me. It had a round neck with no sleeves, the hem a good three inches higher than my knees. It was shorter than I imagined, but really looked good on me. The new black heels went on my feet, I clipped on the gold earrings, and then the thin gold watch mom gave me. I touched up my lipstick, and went to mom's room.

"Oh my! You look spectacular! I wish I could wear something like that!"

She spritzed me with perfume, then gave me a black handbag.

"I'll be ready in a few minutes Abbie."

Mom

To say I was shocked at how pretty my son is when he's dressed up as a girl would be an understatement. He makes his sister look frumpy in a lot of ways. The first time I helped him get dressed I watched his reaction. He never said anything, but I knew without any doubt he was thrilled beyond words. I had to help him a bit with makeup, but he's a quick learner, and today he did it by himself, and did it quite well. I half thought he wouldn't set one foot in a salon, which was the test of course. His father and I told him it would be a perm to see just how serious he was about this. Abigail never said a word and boldly walked into the salon with me. I did not let him get a perm of course, just a cut and style, but I had his nails and makeup done. Now he's no longer simply beautiful, he's gorgeous. Abigail still has some doubts, but they all center on his father. To say he adores his father does not put it strongly enough, and now that he has admitted he wants to be a girl, he's worried we'll stop loving him. That's nonsense of course. Do we understand what drives our son to do this? No. Will we try? Yes, but we are going to push him to the limit to see how he reacts. When I told him he would have to cope with the neighbors, he didn't like it, but he didn't change clothes either. I let my hand slide down, and I touched myself, wondering what the allure was for my son.

Abigail

I sat on the sofa, waiting in the familyroom when dad got home. Mom told him we were going out to dinner, and he went to change. Unlike mom and I, he was ready in twenty minutes.

Dinner was at a fine restaurant, and we talked about many things. I went in expecting the worse, but I was accepted for what I seemed to be, a young lady. "We're not going to turn you into anything you don't want to be, but we are certain that living as a girl is the only way for you to find out what you really want in life. Looking at you over the last few days hasn't changed my mind, just my perception. You look very pretty, maybe better than Beth in some ways, and I'll admit that you have changed my idea of a male dressed as a female in a lot of ways already. Maybe I was wrong."

For my father to say he was wrong is a statement of such enormity that I was speechless!

"That's why" said mom, "we bought those clothes for you today. We wanted you to have enough clothes to get by on for a while. If this is what you want, I'll show you everything you need to know to be a woman, from how to dress, sit, walk, or even hem a skirt or dress if you want. Everything a girl should know to become a lady."

After that, they said nothing more about it and we finished dinner and went home.

The next day mom and I went shopping again, added blouses and some tops, then more and better makeup. Those were just a few of the things we picked up. I got some more earrings and so on of my own, shorts and some jeans for girls. On the way home mom let me drive, telling me where to turn and so on, ending up at a small shop. Instantly I knew why we were there. Inside, I had to endure being fitted for the new partial breastforms, but once they were molded and attached to my chest, and I felt the weight of them, I instantly loved them. They looked great, and made it seem as if I had breasts of my own! Mom paid the bill and we went home.

"You're fortunate Abbie. The fitter told me that unlike the old ones, these are made of the new latex and can stay on for months at a time! When I saw them for the first time they looked so real that I can't imagine you taking them off for any reason!"

Smiling, I thought, 'neither can I'.

That night I scanned most of my ID into the computer, then used a picture from the digital camera to recreate everything with the name Abigail Elizabeth Grant on them. Mom told me that she would take me to get a new license the next day. I was on pins and needles all morning, waiting for mom to take me. I had on the pleated tan skirt with a white blouse and white flats. My makeup was as perfect as I could make it. Mom had helped me with my hair and looked almost as good as I did in the salon. I smelled of perfume, tasted the soft pink lipstick and not only looked, but felt more like a girl than ever.

"It will be fine Abbie. Just relax."

She was right. The woman at the counter never even asked me what sex I was. She simply marked the box for female, and I had a new license! As I started to leave, a classmate, Valerie, walked up to me.

"I know you from somewhere. My name is Valerie."

"Abigail Grant" I said, then, as mom and I watched, her eyes grew wider.

"You're..."

"Her name is Abigail Grant Valerie." Mom was a bit forceful and Val stayed silent.

"Can I come over this afternoon Abigail?"

I wasn't sure I wanted to discuss this change of mine with Valerie, but looked at mom who nodded her head yes.

"Okay Valerie. See you then!"

I got in on the drivers side and sagged against the wheel. "I'm dead for sure mom!"

"Not necessarily Abbie. Valerie seemed to be a nice girl. She'll understand."

"She's also one of the most popular girls in school mom. You saw her. She's gorgeous, has that smile of hers, and boys chase after her all the time. I should be so lucky to be like her!"

"You might be. Just be patient."

I was on pins and needles as I waited for Valerie to show up, which mom thought was funny. I checked and rechecked my makeup and hair, added perfume and lipstick, and paced the kitchen. Finally, Valerie showed up.

Valerie

When I saw Andy, er, Abbie, I was shocked to say the least. Oh, I had seen boys dressed as girls before, my brother even did it a few times at Halloween. But this isn't Halloween, and Abigail looks spectacular to say the least. I never knew that Andy wanted to dress like a girl, and I've known him since grade school! The fact that she was getting a new drivers license, dressed that way, can only mean one thing, and that is she intends be here a while, and with her mother there, it's obvious that her parents are letting her do this, even helping her in a lot of ways. I know what kind of person Andy is, and I can't imagine Abigail being any different, but I had to find out, so I asked if I could come over to her house. I have no idea how this will work out, but I'll give her a chance to tell me before I make up my mind.

 

Abigail

I let Valerie into the house, and at mom's urging, we went out on the patio. Compared to her I was still just a boy in a skirt, and as she let her eyes roam over me I felt like a butterfly stuck on a board.

"Damn! I never would have guessed this about you! You look terrific!

No, better than that, you're gorgeous!"

She took my hand in hers and demanded that I tell her all. My secret was out now anyway wasn't it?, so what did I have to lose? She listened to me, then, when I was done she sat back.

"Not very many kids are going to understand this Abbie, you know that don't you?"

I nodded my head yes.

"Some, maybe even most of the guys certainly won't, and might even get violent about it if they hit on you and then find out. Myself, I don't care, but trust me on this, you'll have to be very careful, or so damn good at it that nobody would ever know, or figure it out."

The despair that had plagued me for so long once again rose in my throat, swelling until I felt myself wanting to cry.

"Looking at you Abbie, I'd say that you have the looking good part down pretty good. Now all you have to do is master the rest and get on with your life." Valerie turned out to be a lot more open minded than I had thought.

I sat and looked at her, so scared of the future that I hardly spoke at all.

"What you need is a coach!"

"Coach?"

"Sure. Somebody to show you how to be a teenage girl, and who better than me?" Valerie represented everything I liked in a girl. She has that smile, those beautiful green eyes of hers, and of course, when she walked, it was like watching fluid in motion. She's smart and pretty, popular, never without a date if she wanted one, and almost always cheerful. As an example of the perfect girl, she is my idol. As an example of what I will never be, I hate her.

"Will you let me help you Abbie?"

As a tear rolled down my cheek I nodded my head yes, and I saw her smile at me. "I think we should make sure you're seen, and the best way to do that is to walk around the mall, Game?"

That familiar lump appeared in my throat again, and my first instinct was to say no, but I swallowed hard, and slowly nodded my head yes.

"I have to tell mom."

"I'll wait here then Abbie."

Mom gave me some money and told me to buy a new wallet, and to have fun. Fun. I was walking straight into the executioners axe, or nothing would happen. Either way I would be in deeper than I ever imagined I would be just three weeks ago. Valerie and I walked across the yard, then down the street to the mall. It's a four block walk. By the time we reached the first corner Valerie wanted to know how I managed to look so nice, and all I could tell her was that this is the way I turned out.

"Trust me Abbie, as long as you don't do anything stupid you'll be fine.

Hell, you look better than some of my friends!"

I thought she was being nice, then she asked me to think about Melissa. That brought a smile to my lips. Melissa is very nice, and some would say pretty, but she is way overweight, and doesn't have a clue when it comes to makeup or hair. I suppressed my smile and tried to keep in step with her.

I told Valerie I needed a new wallet, so we went into a store and I found one on sale. I bought it, then transferred my things to the new wallet. Valerie saw my temporary license and snatched it away.

"It says your name is Abigail Elizabeth Grant, a female aged 17!"

I smiled as I put it in the wallet, and then in my purse.

"This is great!"

"Why?"

"Because you have legal identification that says you are a girl silly!"

I still didn't get it.

"Listen Abbie, if someone questions you, you'll be able to prove you are who you say you are, and who's going to argue with the state and your mother?"

That simple statement brought me to life when I realized she was right, and compared to Melissa and maybe a few others, I did look okay, and now that I could prove I was a girl, I felt myself relaxing, and smiled at Valerie. We went into all of the shoe stores, a fancy lingerie shop, then into a perfume shop. So far I had only used mom's scent, so Valerie and I decided that I needed one of my own. I smelled a few, then I came to one I liked, and bought a very small bottle. It almost broke me, and Valerie just laughed!

"It's the price we pay to smell better than the guys do Abbie."

Just as we walked out of the shop we ran smack into the horde. That's what most of the kids call these guys.

Valerie

When Abbie told me about how she felt, and the fear she always tasted when she dressed up in the past I understood. No matter what she was under the clothes, she looked great, but she doesn't believe it yet. Her mother and I see it, but Abbie is still scared to death in a lot of ways. I think that as long as she is with someone she trusts, she's okay, but the minute she's alone she lapses into this funky I can't do it routine. That's why I asked her to come to the mall with me. It's crowded, a lot of our friends are usually there, and if she survives there, she'll feel better about herself. Besides that, she's my friend.

Abigail

The horde is made up of a bunch of losers that are actually proud of the fact that all of them have flunked at least one grade. They all tried to grow beards or moustaches, usually wore tight jeans and blue Hawaiian shirts under leather jackets with clunky boots. Their so called leader is Rancid, real name Raymond, a slob if there ever was one. I was sure their collective IQ was somewhat less than our cat, who at least kept herself clean. I couldn't say the same for the horde. Valerie and I tried to walk around them but an arm snaked out and grabbed me, spun me around and held me there.

"Looky here! A new chick, and she's a real looker too!"

"Let her go you big ape!"

Valerie was pounding on his arm, which he ignored, and slipped his hand to my right breast and squeezed. Some of my breast was me, some was silicone, so it didn't hurt as much as it could have, but I mashed down on his foot trying to get away. It didn't even phase him. Rancid is head taller than I am and outweighs me by 50 pounds, so it was no contest really. Valerie kicked him and was yanked back by one of his goons, then, as she tried to scream he clamped a hand over her mouth. I saw a finger tapping Rancid on the shoulder, then a fist as it sailed past my ear and connected. I heard the bone in his nose break, and as he let go of me so he could face our hero, he pulled a knife.

With blood streaming down his face Rancid wasn't afraid to return the favor, and looked very angry.

"Come on pal, let's see if you can beat this!"

Rancid lunged, and the guy stepped aside, letting Rancid go by, then he kicked him hard, right in the underwear. We all heard the groan, and watched as Rancid fell to the floor in a tight ball, moaning in pain. Mall security came running, and the goons let Valerie go, running down the concourse, leaving their leader to face the music all alone. I was shaking, afraid for a variety of reasons. Lets start with the fact that I am a boy in a skirt and blouse. I was scared to death when Rancid grabbed me, and now, I'm standing here waiting for security to take our names and so on. That's when I learned the name of our hero. He's tall and husky with blond hair cut short and brown eyes. He stood there easily, sure of himself, unafraid of anything. His name is Stanley. I must have been staring because Valerie nudged me, then smiled at me. A female officer asked us if we were okay, then we had to give her our ID. I handed her my temporary license and waited. None of us were hurt at all, just scared. Rancid had to be hauled away in an ambulance.

"Thank you for helping us!"

"My pleasure. I'm Stan Wood by the way."

"Hi. I'm Valerie, and this is Abigail."

Stan didn't seem the least excited by what he had just done, his face was calm, a smile on his face wide, and more, he was staring at me! Valerie was grinning, I was trying.

"Let me buy you ladies a soda. To make up for this."

Before I could say a word,

"We'd like that Stan."

Without a word Valerie took one arm, so I took the other, walking along together until we reached the cafŽ area. Stan went to get our drinks, and Valerie was almost jumping out of her chair.

"Girl, he's got eyes for you! Lucky girl."

"No!"

"Oh yes. You saw the way he was staring at you, that can only mean one thing." Just then Stan returned.

I was sipping on my drink, trying to be very feminine, just in case Valerie was right, when Stan asked if he could call me! I almost choked on my drink. "I'm new here, and I don't know anybody, except you two of course."

Trying to steer away from the issue of his calling me, I told him he looked pretty cool when he took out Rancid.

"It's all a matter of leverage and timing. He didn't have a clue how to use a knife, so it was easy to bait him, and he fell for it."

He saw the question on my face and he laughed.

"You never toss a knife from one hand to the other. You lose control that way. He was all mouth anyway. It was nothing."

I was impressed as hell, because I couldn't take Rancid on my best day, as compared to Stan's worst, and Stan merely shook it off like it was nothing!

"Let me walk you girls home."

"Sure!"

Valerie was at it again, but there wasn't any gracious way to say no, so, with Val on one side and me on the other, we headed back home. Valerie's house was first, so we dropped her off, and I said I could make it from there, but he wasn't having any of that, took my hand in his and asked me to lead the way. We walked the other two blocks hand in hand, then, as we turned the corner I saw that dads truck was in the driveway. This might not be good, but he had agreed, insisted in fact, that I dress as a girl, and now I was stuck holding Stan's hand We walked up the driveway together. Dad saw us, then came over.

"Daddy, this is Stan Wood. He saved Valerie and I today. We were attacked in the mall and Stan flattened him!"

I didn't want to sound like I was in awe, but I was, and it came out that way. "It was Rancid dad."

"That's the puke that thinks he's tough?"

I nodded my head yes.

"He wouldn't like to have me see him trying that!"

That statement was true. Dad would turn Rancid into plumbers putty in a hot minute, but Rancid knows when to be cool and when not. He would never try anything around my dad or any other male he thought could take him. That's what happened with Stan, but Rancid made a mistake.

"He had a knife dad, but Stan broke his nose, and kicked him in the...underwear, then took it away from him!"

Dad looked at Stan and smiled.

"I owe you son. Thanks for watching out for Abbie."

"It was nothing sir. But sir, can I call on Abbie in the future sir?"

"Of course! Here's my card, our number is right there."

Stan kissed my hand, shook dad's and walked down the street.

"How could you do that to me!"

"What?"

Dad didn't get it and I stormed in the house, my skirt flaring as I turned and ran. I was in my room when mom came in and shut the door. She was smiling at me I noticed.

"Had a nice afternoon I see!"

"Dad said Stan could call me!"

"Why shouldn't he call you?"

I told her what happened, even about Rancid grabbing my breast, and everything Stan had done.

"It sounds like he is attracted to you Abbie. I saw him, and he's very cute.

You make a cute couple."

"Mom!"

"Don't mom me young lady! I'll bet that you even thought of something like this happening. This might be exactly what you need."

I sat on the bed while she sat at the vanity.

"This is what I told you about. I said there would be a boy out there who would be attracted to you, and now that you're dressing as a girl, you would have to cope with it. This boy sounds like he's very nice Abigail, and you should think about it before you say no if he asks you out."

She was right. I had thought about something like this happening to me. What made me nervous was that I was hoping it would, but I couldn't admit that out loud. I could hardly admit it to myself! Stan is everything my dad wanted in a son. Tall, good looking, strong as an ox, smart and polite. I'm short, pudgy in a few places, and not nearly as strong as most boys my age. I'm smart and polite, which ends our similarities, other than we are both males. Now I knew that I was attractive enough to have a boy want to be with me, but exactly how do I manage to keep him from finding out about me? We ate on the patio that night, and dad was grinning at me all through dinner, but didn't say anything about Stan, or myself.

Dad

As a father, we all want our children to do well. I had hoped that Andy would join me and become a plumber. He became a girl instead, which scares me in a lot of ways. One, Abigail is actually very cute, something I never expected, two, she seems to have jumped into this with both feet, never looking back. Then of course there's three. Stan. To see them walking along holding hands shook me to the core, then I heard what Stan had done to Rancid. I'll admit that Stan is everything a father could want in a boy his daughter would date. But Abigail is my son! I didn't see one sign that Abbie was the least bit afraid for me to see them together, then, when she described what had happened, she sounded like an awe struck little girl! The fact that this Rancid character, who has terrorized the school for years, was stomped to the ground by Stan, only reinforced that there was no way Andy could have beat them off. He is simply too small. Valerie might be a good influence on Abigail, certainly better than her sister Beth. All I can do at this point is go along with this...change, and hope for the best, but she and her mother are repainting her bedroom and redecorating it to look more like a girls room! I hope she learns a lot. Three months is long enough for Abigail to find herself, but when she goes back to school, it will be Andy that goes.

Mom

Abigail is confused right now. First she had to struggle, then admit to first me, then her father, that she wants to be a girl. She didn't say it, but I know that she doesn't want to be a boy in a dress, but a real girl. We set up a test to call her on it, but she had her hair and nails done as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Then she wanted to repaint her bedroom, and now, there is Stan. She's set high goals for herself, but she's scared to death that she will be discovered. Abbie tries to cover her fear with a smile, but I know. Her father doesn't. I'm willing to bet that it was circumstance rather than an invitation that led Stan to walk her home, but when she showed up hand in hand with him, she looked as if it was the most normal thing in the world, and I'm beginning to wonder if we did the right thing. Letting her dress all the time I mean. Abbie is becoming more and more feminine each day, and that's scaring her father. I am very concerned.

Abigail

Over the next few days I rearranged my bedroom, then mom let me pick out some pictures from the ones she had stored away. All of them were of small bears prancing in the woods. This was definitely going farther than I planned, but I picked out the colors and the paintings, so I did not object, and the next day I had a bedspread to match the paintings, frilly pillows and all! I usually wore jeans or shorts, sometimes no makeup, sometimes a lot, yet mom said nothing. Valerie came over once and helped us decorate my room. We talked about Stan, her boyfriend Greg, and generally goofed off. I showed her some of the Internet sites I had found that catered to boys like me, and she was stunned to see how many of them actually looked good. Some had impressive cleavage, a nice figure, and absolutely beautiful faces, some were less convincing of course, but on average, most of them could walk into a crowded mall and nobody could pick them out of the crowd. Valerie went home, and I did some more searching. Then I stumbled across a site that sold everything I would need to convince most people that I was a girl. I quickly clicked through the various pages, stopping on the one that detailed what I saw, and how to order it. I read it twice, and had bookmarked the page when mom walked into my room, and saw what I was looking at.

"Oh my God! That looks real!"

"It's a full panty mom. It's especially made for guys like me. It has a built in sheath for my... well, if I had one these panties I would be sitting down in the bathroom, just like you and Beth."

I clicked through all of the pictures again, then I printed out the instructions on how to order one to match my skin tone. Mom grabbed it, read it, then sat back, staring at me.

"If we let you buy one of these panties, you and I will have to have a serious talk about boys and girls!"

"Mom!"

"That's what your sister said and she ended up pregnant!"

"Mom, that's ridiculous! I can't get pregnant, now matter what I do!"

"That's true, but it says right here that sex is possible, and that makes you just as susceptible as any other girl."

"Mom, I'm not Beth, I'm me."

That brought her up short. Beth was a little wild, and went out with some guys that dad really didn't like, some of them secretly. That's how she ended up pregnant. I'm not sure she learned a lesson from it, but it's her life, not mine, and I refused to be lumped into the same group as Beth. I identify with mom or Valerie. They are the kind of girl I want to be.

"Your right Abbie, I'm sorry. This panty isn't that expensive, but we'll have to tell your father about it."

"Do we have to tell him I could have sex? He'll go ballistic if he finds out."

"No, I guess we don't have to tell him that. Show me that site again Abbie."

I went back to it, and as we flipped through the pages, she saw the other girls that wore one, and looked perfectly real to us.

"That would complete the picture wouldn't it?"

If she bought it for me I would be able to solve a number of other problems. I'd like to have it of course.

"Print the instructions for that page as well Abbie."

I did as she asked, then I shut down and we went to fix dinner. Mom was the one to show dad the pictures, and insisted that I needed it, if only for my own protection, and he finally agreed. He also hated it.

The next morning told me we were going shopping. I did my makeup, slipped on my gym shoes, and we went to an art supply store where we determined the exact skin tone I had in my groin. On the way home mom didn't say a word, but when we got home she and I went to my room where I stripped so she could apply the gel mold to my lower body. It took almost an hour to set, then she carefully removed the mold. When we looked at it, there was a perfect replica of my lower body imbedded in the gel. Then she took my natural waist and hip measurements, wrote them down and we decided together what the ideal figure would be for me. Beth wears a 36, just like mom, so mom thought that I should be the same size. When we were done, we had decided that I should be 34-25-35.

"I'll pack these up and send them. You get dressed."

I don't know how he managed it, but Stan found my number and called that night. Dad answered the phone and handed it to me. Stan wanted to take me to a show on Friday night. In my heart I was sure he would call me. Now all I had to do was respond, and I did. I agreed, then he said he would be over at seven to get me. Friday is three days away. I told mom but not dad. I didn't think he was ready for me to be dating a boy. All I had to do was convince him, and I had three days to manage it. I was more than surprised when I heard the doorbell ring Thursday afternoon, then I saw the delivery truck. I signed for the box, saw it was addressed to me, and quickly went to my room so I could open it in private. Inside I found the panty mom and I had ordered. I went to find mom, then she and I went back to my room. After reading the instructions twice, she used the included adhesive to attach the panty. It was hard to get on, but we managed. The upper edge, at my waist, was glued in place, then, when we were done, I stood in front of the mirror and looked. The skin color on the panty were a perfect match for my own skin, and even up close it was very hard to tell if it was me, or latex, silicone and glue!

"I think we can convince your father now Abbie, if you want to do a little shopping that is."

I did, and I quickly dressed. This time the panties fit me like they are supposed to, the bra held me in just right. I slipped on my shorts, and saw that they now fit me like they would any girl. I have a clearly defined groin area that tapers to a wedge between my legs, breasts that bounced a little when I walked. Between the partial breastforms, which made it look as if I actually had breasts, and the panty, there no sign that I was a male anywhere. Mom saw me grinning, and simply told me to get in the car. What mom had in mind was a powder blue babydoll set that was so sheer it would be like wearing a vaporous cloud around myself. If I wore the panties, my groin would be hidden of course, but as soon as we bought it I knew that I wasn't going to wear them. I 3was getting to be as sneaky as mom! The minute we got home I called Valerie and told her I wanted to come over, so I left for her house on foot.

Her mother, who knew me, didn't say a word as Valerie introduced me, then I told her I had something to show her, and could we go up to her bedroom. Valerie led the way, then, as soon as the door was closed, I told her I had something to show her, then I unbuttoned my blouse, took it off, and unhooked my bra, letting my breasts free. I heard her gasp even as I slipped my shorts off and yanked down my panties. The look on her face was priceless, and I quickly got dressed again while she groped for something to say.

"That is a really cool trick Abbie! Care to tell me how you did it?"

"No, and this has to be our secret. Only me, you, and mom know, and I

want to keep it that way. Okay"

She smiled and agreed, then I told her that Stan had asked me out, and I accepted his invitation to go to the show with him on Friday. Valerie visibly relaxed after I showed her my new attributes, and we both knew that we were going to have a fun summer together.

Valerie

When Abbie showed me her...assets, I was shocked at how much she looked like me! You would never know unless you were up close, or she told you. I was standing just a few feet away and I couldn't tell! Abbie was grinning as she got dressed, and I was now sure she was very serious about this. That afternoon we stayed in my room talking, mostly about what she was going to do in the future. She said she didn't know, but she doesn't want to give up Abigail under any circumstance, and I'm beginning to wonder if I want her to stay as well.

Abigail

That night after dinner, when mom winked at me, I went to my room and slipped on the babydoll and robe set. I wore Beth's old bunny slippers, slipped the robe on, but didn't fasten the sash, and went down the stairs and into the familyroom. Dad looked up, his eyes growing wide when he saw my breasts clearly defined by the wisp of thin material. I watched as his eyes moved down, and the tapering hair on my groin stood out, the thin slit that defined my new reality not seen, but evidently there. His mouth opened, then closed, then opened again. Before he could say anything mom told him that she and I had made a few changes in order to make it easier for me to fit in, and be more comfortable in public. Of course, he knew about the panty, we had told him, but he didn't see what he thought of as a panty, and that's what disturbed him. We had not told him about the breastforms, so of course, he was shocked to see that I now had breasts. After he quit staring at me, I casually mentioned that Stan was taking me to the show tomorrow. I expected something, but all I got was a shrug. He gave up I think, or he was still so shaken that he couldn't say anything.

I started getting ready at 4 by taking a long bubblebath, shaving my arms and legs to remove the thin stubble that had grown back, then shaved my face as close as possible. I was out of the tub, with a towel around myself when mom walked in on me. In her hand was what looked like a bundle of car tie downs, but thinner.

"Before you get dressed, I want you to wear this tonight."

"What is it?"

"It's a sanitary belt. It'll hold your sanitary pad in place for you."

"Mom! I don't need a sanitary belt!"

"Yes dear, I know that, but this is part of being a female, and you might as well get used to it since you'll wear one for five days a month, just like the rest of us."

She handed me the bundle, but I could not make out just how it went on, so she showed me, clipping the tabs to the pad and making it tight against me. I felt like I was back where I started, with a lump between my legs.

"Now you can get dressed."

She left me standing there wearing that stupid belt with a huge pad between my legs! I slipped on my panties, then went to the vanity to do my makeup, and put in a few rollers. When I had the bra on I pulled out what I had decided to wear. The blouse is gray with short sleeves, the skirt red, pleated all the way around, and short. On me it comes to mid thigh, and showed off my legs just right, especially with the pantyhose.

As I sat there waiting for the curling iron to heat up it came to me. Mom has me wearing this sanitary pad, not because all the other girls do, it's because I have a date tonight! Most boys won't go near a girl that has one on, so I can only conclude that it's her way of making sure he and I don't do the nasty tonight! I finished my hair, slipped some earrings on with a necklace, and slipped my feet into the black flats. Some perfume, my new stuff, then bright red lipstick. I checked my purse, then joined mom to make dinner.

"How does it feel?"

"What?"

She gave me one of her looks.

"Bulky. It feels like I did before."

"You'll get used to it Abbie, we all do, and after a little while it shapes itself to you and gets less noticeable."

I said nothing more about it, and when dad got home we ate dinner, then I helped mom clean the table. Stan was right on time, and dad surprised me by being so friendly with Stan. Stan's face broke out in a wide grin when he saw me, which made me feel warm all over, then he took my hand and we left. He drove us to the show, which was an action movie, then we stopped at Big Ben's for a soda and a burger. The place was crowded with kids I went to school with, and we found ourselves sitting across from a table full of girls that I knew. It was all I could do to stop from jumping up and running out. Not one person recognized me, and I knew two of those girls extremely well! When we left I expected him to stop somewhere and try to ravage me, but he took me straight home instead. He did kiss me however, and in a moment of passion I let his tongue slip into my mouth. As we kissed I could feel myself heating up, especially when he put his hand on my leg. Now I knew why mom made me wear this stupid pad. I broke free, thanked him, and ran in the house panting.

That night as I lay in bed my hand drifted to my panty, I pushed the pad aside, and let my finger slip into the panty. It was hopeless. I never wanted to be a boy again. Every fiber in me was screaming at me, telling me I was a girl, in big, bold type. I loved everything about it, including wearing the sanitary pad. I would never admit that either.

Mom wanted to know how it went, I said fine, then she asked me how I felt when he kissed me. Without a thought I said,

"He made me tingle all over."

She said nothing, and I went about my chores, then she told me that dad wanted to see me at the shop, so I drove over alone. He was waiting in his office, papers piled all over the place as usual.

"No more lounging around Abbie. You need a job and I need someone to straighten this mess out and get my records in order, and you're it. I'll pay you of course, and I expect you to answer the phones, take orders and also, dress professionally. No shorts or jeans, okay?"

"Okay dad."

He moved out of the chair and I sat down. Dad told me he had a few jobs to do, and for me to lock up at five. I looked around and saw paperwork piled everywhere. Dad is a great plumber, but his skill at paperwork lacked a bunch. It was obvious that I had to sort through it all, so I started on the desk, which took almost three hours. I had piles all over the place. Then I started sorting those piles. His computer system is a dinosaur, but I managed to find all of his records, printed them all out, then saved the files to disk. Using the printouts, I found several thousand dollars worth of work that had not been billed! That night, when I told him that, he started grinning, until I told him he needed to upgrade his computer and donate the one he has to a museum. Since the money I needed to spend for a new system, was less than what was due, he reluctantly agreed, and gave me his credit card.

With the new system, I set up the files to make the office work easier. Dressing as a girl became a non issue as I worked out how to manage the billing, payables, wages and so on. It took a week just to do the current billing! Dad's system of billing wasn't the best, but all of his bills were paid. I was putting in 12 hour days trying to set it up and clear up the paperwork. His edict of no jeans went out the window the second day. Kneeling on the floor sorting paper is hard on nylons. Stan did not call for two days, then, when he did, mom told him I was at work, so he called me here at the office. He asked me out for Saturday night. Dad stopped in a few times to check on me, and I could tell he was still uncomfortable with me dressing as a girl, but he never said a word about it. Stan and I went out to the show again, but this time he parked down the street from the house. When his lips touched mine, I turned into a blob of quivering nerve endings that he sent to the edge when he touched my leg. As much as I felt like a girl, I wasn't, and stopped him before he gained momentum and I did something I wanted to do but shouldn't.

Valerie came to the office, and in private we talked about what was happening. So far, I have enjoyed dressing as a girl, and done more than I thought possible, especially dating Stan, or even kissing another male, but I knew in my heart that going to school as a girl was out of the question. In schools all over the country kids were being shot for being different, and this certainly qualified as different. I have no ambition to die because I like to dress this way, so I would have to be myself when school started in the fall. The problem is the growing attraction Stan and I have. Valerie had nothing to offer in the way of a solution, and all I could do was hope for the best. Mom was no help when I mentioned it to her, simply telling me that I would have to work it out myself. That's the dilemma. I don't want to give up what I've discovered about myself, yet the more I thought about it, the clearer it got. In a month, maybe a bit more, I would have to put Abigail back in the closet. Complicating all of this was Stan. Just how does Abbie disappear and Andy show up, without Stan finding out? Sure, I looked like a girl, acted like a girl, at least most of the time, and felt like a girl all of the time, but...

It was a month before I had finally managed to get all of dad's files in proper order, the due bills sent out and the files in order before I even thought about anything else. I knew that twice in the last four years Dad had been nailed for having "Unaccounted for assets" in the shop proper. He used the axiom that junk expands to fill all available space I think. He had stuff stacked everywhere, and while he might be able to find it, nobody else had a clue! I suggested that we head off the IRS by straightening out the mess, toss all of the junk and sort out what was left. He hated the idea, but was forced by the facts to admit it was a good idea, and without asking me, he hired Stan to help sort it all out! Dad said Stan would do the sorting work, and I would create a catalog so we would know what we had on hand. Stan showed up the next day.

Working side by side with Stan was both good and bad. When I was there by myself, I could relax and not worry so much about feminine gestures and just do the work. With Stan there, I had to be as feminine as he expected me to be, plus the added complication of his attraction to me. The first day he showed up I did what mom told me to do, I set the ground rules. I told him that we did not have time for anything but the job, and that I would be in the office until he sorted out the good stuff from the junk. Once in a while Dad would stop by and help, and as the collection of old pipe, used fixtures and so on grew, it was obvious that we would need a huge scrap tub, so I ordered one. Stan started to take his shirt off as it was so hot, and as he worked, I saw his muscles as they rippled when he moved. I had never been attracted to boys in any way, but Stan was different, and I felt myself wanting to be near him. I stayed in the office more often after that.

Dad

At one time I had hoped Andy would be a plumber like me, now it was obvious that wasn't going to happen. When I got tired of spending money on this... hobby, I decided to put her to work. I told her to straighten out the office. I figured that all that would happen is a little filing. But Abbie took the job like it was a mission, and has managed to computerize everything! She even found bills that showed money due us! Maybe she'll be a part of the company anyway! This thing with Stan has me confused, because Andy never once showed any inclination towards other boys, yet I saw her kiss Stan the other night. I wanted to run out there and shake some sense into her, but Audrey told me no. She told me that Andy is no longer our son. She said he is now our daughter, and I might as well get used to it. After seeing her the other night in that wisp of nothing she had on, I saw her breasts, and what seemed to be.. well, she looks like her mother now. I knew that Abbie was very serious about this right then. That night Audrey told me it's a special kind of panty made for boys that want to be girls, but damn! It looked real! I saw Abbie watching Stan the other day when he had his shirt off. He's a good looking kid, but it seems so unnatural for my son to be watching Stan that way. At least to me.

Abigail

Stan had the shop cleaned out, the bins emptied, and piles of stuff on the floor. Dad decided to spend the day helping, and as they started putting things back in the bins I wrote down what and how many of each we had. It took all day before they had it done, then it was my turn to finish the job. Dad took Stan to finish a job while I stayed in the office. It took me three days to catalog all of the items, then I started to look around. The office really needed a new coat of paint, and that night I asked if Stan could do it for us. Within a week I had everything set up again, and now spent my days answering the phones while Stan was with my dad. He and I went out a few more times, usually to the show, then, one Saturday night it happened. Instead of taking me home he went to the park. As he pulled me to him, I knew that our relationship was growing stronger, and let him hold me tight. His hand found my breast, and as he massaged me I began to tingle all over. I felt his hand when it touched my leg, then, without thought, I opened my legs and his hand found me. In a flurry of panting and struggle, I had my panties on the floor and he was on top of me. My hand found him, and guided him to me, then, after just a little push, he slid into the panty. I could feel him through the thin membrane as he stroked back and forth, then, all at once he expended and collapsed on me. Ten minutes later we were both dressed again, panting, staring at each other. I had definitely crossed the line this time. I went to my room as soon as I got home, stripped, and went in the bath to clean myself. Stuff ran down my leg, which I washed off, but I could not wash away the fact that I had just given myself to a man, something I said I would not do. I was like Beth, and I hated myself for it. I was going to be a lady, like mom, now I was just another girl with hot pants.

I held in my shame for two days. I was at work when mom stopped in, and saw me crying. Before I could think about it, I grabbed her, hugged her to me, then told her what I had done. She listened until I was done, not saying a thing, then, "You're not the first girl to give in to a boy Abbie, and you're certainly not going to be the last. Think about it this way. You can't get pregnant, and you don't have to do it again."

I hugged her until she pushed me away and sat down.

"Abbie, we have to talk about the future. Do you plan on attending school as a girl?"

"No."

"Can you give up on yourself so easily?"

"The other kids won't understand so easily mom."

"That assumes they know. What if we see to it they don't know?"

"How?"

"Your father and I talked about this a few days ago. We don't think there is any way that you can quit being a girl, so we have decided to change your name to Abigail Elizabeth legally, and get your school records changed. That way you can be the person you really are, and we can all quit this charade, wondering how long this will last. We all know it's permanent, don't we?"

Mom was right. I couldn't give up on myself now.

"If you enroll in the Co-op program, you can attend half days and work here in the office. Your father is very impressed by the way you managed to straighten things out, and wants you to keep working here."

I couldn't find the words to say what I felt, and started to bawl again. Then mom and I had a mother daughter talk about men and women. No, that's not right, she talked and I listened.

My parents took care of the name change, and true to what she told me, I started school that fall as Abigail. Valerie was surprised, but not very much I think, and she kept my secret to herself. Since I started in Co-op virtually from the first day, my contact with many of the kids was minimal, and in any case they never once questioned my real sex. To them I was just another girl. Stan also started that fall, and like myself, he was also in Co-op. He was my dad's apprentice.

Stan and dad grew closer while mom and I began to share things mothers and daughters should share. I was seeing Stan every weekend now, and I could not imagine life without him. But after a few weeks he began to become a little more distant, which bothered me because he wasn't usually like that. Like women everywhere, I waited for him to make his move rather than ask him what was wrong. This lasted for almost a month before I found out, and I was devastated when I did.

Stan

Bill is smart, and I'm learning a lot from him. Being a plumber is a good profession, and I'm trying to learn all I can from him. He told me it takes a minimum of three years before I can get a license, so it's a long haul, but worth it. He and I were on a job on day when Abbie came up in conversation, which is when he let it drop that Abbie is actually his son! I was stunned because she and I had sex together, and I was sure he was wrong, but just how would I tell him we had sex? From the minute I saw her in the mall I wanted to be with her. Abbie is bright and funny, beautiful beyond words and I love her. Now her father says she is a male! He should certainly know the sex of his children, but she and I had sex, and if Abbie is a male, how did we manage that? The minute I heard that I wanted to go to the shop and ask her directly, but what if he was pulling my leg? Bill didn't sound like he was saying it as a joke, so I'm half ready to believe him. If Abbie is a male, what does that make me?

Dad

I really screwed up! I mentioned that Abbie is a boy. Stan was of course in disbelief, but he never challenged me on it. He has been avoiding the shop, and hasn't talked to Abbie in a week.

Mom

When Bill told me what he had done I was furious with him. Abbie has poured her heart out to us, done her best to become the daughter she always wanted to be, and worked hard to not show her fear to anyone but us. Stan represents her acceptance as a female, and she is in love with him to the point that they had sex already. I'll have to tell Abbie, but I'll wait until she is at the office, or here at home, when we can be alone.

Abigail

Mom told me what dad had done, and I knew it was over. I was angry with dad because I trusted him, and he blew it. Now I'll be lucky if Stan only tells everyone in school. Mom sat there looking mad, not at me, but at dad. I was so angry that I wanted to call him and let him have it right there and then! I sank to the bed sure that my new life, the one I had carefully crafted out of my fear was going to be in shambles. We were at home when she told me. It was Friday, so I had all weekend to try and figure out what to do. I am enrolled at school as Abigail, and couldn't just stop dressing as a girl now, even if I wanted to, which I don't. Stan. He is the key to this, and we have to talk about it, but how? He's avoiding me.

Dad

I've never seen Audrey this angry at me before, and trust me, it's not a pretty sight. She told me in very clear terms what we, she and I would have to do. I asked Stan to come over for dinner that night. I hope Audrey is right about this. It could ruin all of us.

Abigail

Mom told me that Stan was coming over for dinner, and the four of us would work it out. She sounded very firm about this, and I'm sure that dad is in for it, but it's Stan and I that are the centerpiece of this little show. Mom told me to clean up, then left me so I could change. If I was going to get torn apart because of what dad had done, I thought I might as well confuse the issue as much as I could, so I pulled out the sundress. It's very feminine looking, and better, allows me to show off some cleavage. I stripped and went to the shower, shaved and checked for stray hairs, then started to get dressed. I was scared at what might happen tonight, so in order to make myself feel as feminine as possible, and because I could, I didn't wear a pantybrief or panties or pantyhose. Just my corselet, which gives me a smaller waist and hikes up my boobs. I did my makeup in muted tones of green and gray with black eyeliner and mascara. I did my hair in a flip and slipped the dress over my head, zipped it up, and stepped into my white heels. I put on some white button earrings with a necklace to match, dabbed on some perfume, did my lipstick, and opened the bedroom door. Mom was standing there, reaching for the doorknob.

"Stay up here until I call you Abbie, okay?"

"Okay mom."

I shut the door to wait. Looking in the mirror all I saw was girl. The twin mounds of my breasts swelled out of the dress a little, my waist, now a trim 24 inches was accented by the flaring of the skirt, which had a hemline just above my knees. There was nothing else I could do except wait. About ten minutes later I heard mom call my name. I opened the door to the room and stepped out. The carpeting hid the sound of my heels until I stepped into the foyer. Stan, mom, and dad were all in the familyroom waiting. I drew in a breathe and went in, sitting next to mom on the small sofa.

"We all know why we are here. Stan, you and Abbie have dated for quite a while now, and I know that you two have had sex, so tell me, is she any less a woman that any other girl you've dated?"

"No Ma'am."

"Bill, has Abbie been anything less than a wonderful daughter in the last few months?"

"No, but..."

"Stan, Bill told you Abbie is his son, and that is true, but look at her and tell me she is any less a woman than I am."

Stan looked at me, shock on his face, but there was no way he could deny the way I looked.

"I can't."

"Then what's the problem here? Abbie loves you and you know it, and I think you love her as well. It's true that she can never have children, but there are other ways to have a family, if you two are adult enough to face it together. Abbie is scared that you might hate her, now that you have found out her secret, and you're mad that you weren't sharp enough to discover it on your own, or that having sex with her makes you something your not."

Mom sat back and said nothing for a minute.

"Tell me Stanley, do you love Abbie?"

He nodded his head yes, but mom told him to say it.

"Yes Ma'am."

"Does she seem any different than any other time you've seen her?"

"No Ma'am."

"Then we can assume that you still love her?"

"Yes Ma'am."

"Bill, we have a few things to discuss, lets go out on the patio."

It wasn't anything less than an order, so dad left with mom, leaving Stan and I looking at each other.

He was staring at me, unable I know, to say anything, which left it to me. "Stan, I wanted to tell you, I really did, but I had fallen for you, and didn't want to take the chance that you would either hurt me, or worse, let me worry forever."

He sat there, not moving at all, and I felt my eyes filling with tears. Dabbing with a tissue I waited, then he was standing there in front of me, no smile, his hands at his side. Not wanting to be looked down on, I stood up. Meanwhile, out on the patio...

"You're telling me that Abbie can have sex! How? Never mind I don't want to know!"

"Bill, you brought this all on yourself, but this might turn out to be the best thing that's happened to her so far. And, to answer your question, Abbie can have sex the same way we do. That panty she wears is made in a way that allows her to function as a woman."

"You never told me that!"

"You had no reason to know Bill. Abbie is, in many ways a better daughter than Beth ever was and you know it. Look how she has transformed your office. Beth could never do that. Think about how she acts around you and I. She has always been ready to help out around here, and she loves herself now, something she never did before. We both see it in the way she walks and talks, her smile and the way she is so confident. Can you say that was the way it was before?

"No, I guess not, but..."

"Bill, the only question here is do you love her, and will you support her."

"Of course!"

"Abbie".

I looked up as Stan reached out for me, and fell against him. I felt his lips on my cheek, then on my lips, a gentle caress, yet I shivered.

"Your mother is quite a bundle when she's mad isn't she?"

I did not answer him.

"I'd hate to be in your fathers shoes right about now!"

That made me smile, because he was right.

"Abbie, can we go back a month and start over?"

"Do you mean that? What about..."

I never got the rest out because his lips were on mine, his hands holding me tightly against him.

Dad looked very sheepish when he and mom came back in. They found Stan and I in a lip lock, which we broke off right away. I helped mom make the dinner, and later, Stan and I sat on the patio alone.

"You're going to become a real woman someday, how long does that take?"

"Two years, maybe a bit less, but it'll be worth it."

"I hope so Abbie, two years is a long time to wait."

"I can take care of things, you already know that, and there are other ways."

Just about then he grabbed me and kissed me, his hand roamed up my leg and I let him, then his hand was on my naked sex. I put my hand on his member, stroked it once or twice, then moved away.

"Abbie I..."

"Not here silly! My parents are..."

"Very busy right now."

The lights in their bedroom went off just then, and we were all alone in our private patio. Stan came to me and held me again, then, as he began to stroke my back, whispered in my ear that he loved me. I reached out and touched him again, and watched as his eyes grew wider. I unbuckled his pants and let them fall, pushed him back to the chair and sat on his lap, facing him as he entered me. It was wonderful to be in control and watch him as his eyes closed in ecstasy. He didn't last very long this time either. He and I stayed out there for another two hours, then he left for home. I went to my room to clean up, then went to bed. In the morning Dad was gone already, so mom and I had another talk.

"Your father knows he screwed up, and is willing to try and make amends. I told him that we might as well get you into some kind of program, and he has agreed to pay for everything. After coffee I'll call the doctor while you get dressed."

About two hours later the doctor, after a quick examination, agreed with mom, and gave me a shot. He did say that the hormones might take forever to kick in, but for me to be patient. I went to the office while mom went home. Stan and I never again had vaginal sex, but I did find another way to make him happy that he really liked, and about the time Christmas arrived I had developed enough that I no longer needed the breastforms. Valerie and I got real close, and I told her what had happened between Stan and I. When I told her my boobs were all my own she almost clapped! She was my best girlfriend, and it showed on her face. We were almost to the Christmas break when Rancid and the rest of the horde caught me again. He was very angry with me, and the look on his face made me shake a little.

"I know where you work bitch. Be careful!"

He stomped off one way while I ran to my car. I went straight to the office and called dad. I told him what Rancid said, and he promised to be there each night before five. Two days later, with dad and Stan in the shop, Rancid showed up as I was on the way to my car. I was almost there when he grabbed me, which lasted maybe ten nanoseconds. Dad yanked him away from me, and as Rancid raised his fist, dad hit him as hard as he could, right in the mouth. Dad was panting in anger, Stan standing by, and Rancid quickly got up and faced my dad. A very serious mistake. Rancid ducked and swung, dad stepped back, and hit on the point of the chin, which drove him to the ground again. As he was just getting up, dad kicked him, right in the ribs. I could hear snapping bones from where I was!

"I think we have had enough of you around here. Abbie, go call the cops!" I did. The cops were well aware of Rancid, and when they took our statements, they showed no sympathy towards him. Because he was over 18, dad was in the clear. He was protecting his daughter, me, which is fully justified. The cops dragged Rancid away, and I hugged dad as hard as I could.

Stan and I went to the prom of course, and we both stayed working at the shop. It was a very long two years and four months, but I did have my surgery. Six months later Stan took his plumbers test and passed of course. When we celebrated, it was just he and I, and I showed him just how a woman can love a man..

Mom

Abigail is a wonderful daughter. After Beth went back to school, she stayed there a while then left with her boyfriend for parts unknown, and to this day we do not know where she is. Abbie has blossomed in the last few years, but even while she was still in school she was every bit as much a girl as any other. Stan was a bit wobbly when he found out about her, but they managed to work it out, and now it looks like Bill will have someone to leave the business to. Me? I am happy that Abbie found herself and had the courage to see it through.

Dad

I have to say that I now understand that Abbie has always been my daughter, even when she was a boy. Sure, I was angry at first, sad that it was my son that wanted to be a woman, then I discovered just how vibrant a woman she is. I love her, and wouldn't trade her for anything. Besides, without her, how is Stan going to be part of the family?

Valerie

Abbie is my best friend. I never thought that would happen, especially at first, when she told me, then I watched her as she became a real woman. From head to toe, in her heart and mind she is as much a woman as I am. She has asked me to be her Maid of Honor at her wedding. As close as we are, how can I refuse?

Stan

I can't imagine life without Abbie. From the first time I saw her to this moment she has excited me, deep down where it counts. Sure I was shaken when I found out the truth, but not one time has she ever been less than the woman I know her to be. I asked her to marry me, and she said she would, so we set a date for next June. God I love that girl!

Abigail

Stan has made this all worth it. From the beginning, when I first blurted out what I wanted to be, I tried not to look back. That's not to say I wasn't scared most of the time, I was. But I never could have done this without my parents, and Valerie of course. Stan brought all of my senses to life, and now that I am a woman, I intend to raise every one of his in return, right after the wedding. Thanks for listening to my tale of discovery and longing, fear and love.

(the end)

 

 

© 1999
The above work is copyrighted material. Anyone wishing to copy, archive, or re-post this story must contact the author for permission.

At the request of the author, this story is presented in 12 point, Times New Roman.