What I do is write the story first, then I write the beginning and ending comments, and then I name it. Not always in that order. I just now wrote the words, "The End", and so this is the last chapter. Writing this became a journey of self-discovery and I put a lot of what happened to me in my life into this story. The end however, is only the end of this book, or series or whatever one considers it. What happens afterward, I'm going to leave up to your imagination, which is how I like things.

 

How Life Can Change

by Little Katie

Part XXI: Finding Emily

Emily felt a slight movement underneath her that caused her to stir also. She slowly opened her eyes, seeing Sean trying to stealthily remove himself from under her.

"It's okay, I'm awake," Emily said.

"Sorry." Sean apologized.

"No, I was about to wake up anyway." Emily replied as she sat up.

"I figured you might have wanted to just sleep through school."

"Yeah, and get in more trouble with my mom."

"If I was you, I'd go straight to the principal and tell him."

"No, way!" Emily exclaimed, "All I need is to get into trouble with him, I'd never see outside again."

There was a slight rap on the door then Barbara poked her head in. "Up already, without me having to get after you? Wow, I better mark this day down and remember it always," Barbara teased her son, who was notorious for fighting for every second of sleep.

"I wanted to get the alarm before it woke up Emily." Sean gave a slight squeeze to Emily's shoulder.

"Well, that was very considerate," his mother commended, "but now it's time for you to take a shower and get dressed."

"Yes, Mom."

"Emily, you can come with me while he changes."

"Yes, Aunt Barbara," Emily said sweetly.

Emily walked into the living room, half-expecting to hear the worst news in her life. She sat down at the corner of the couch and hugged a pillow against herself. Barbara sat down right next to her.

"What's wrong?" Emily asked.

"Nothing, your dad was here last night, we didn't want to wake you; you looked so comfortable."

Emily blushed, "I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"Don't worry, I think Sean liked it as much as you did." Barbara smiled and brushed a bit of Emily's fine hair away from her face.

Emily blushed more, truth be known, she had woken up in the middle of the night and found herself lying in Sean's arms. The feeling of security and warmth and love had made her snuggle up all the more, but now her face grew hot thinking about it.

"It's okay, it's okay that you really like him too; you make a wonderful girlfriend, for Sean," Barbara reassured her.

"You know?" Emily was surprised.

"Sean tells me everything."

"Everything?" Emily was doubly embarrassed now.

"Yes, even about what you did in the room."

"Oh," Emily thought she was about to get into more trouble.

"I take it that you liked it."

Emily grinned and blushed, almost hiding her face in the pillow.

Barbara chuckled. "Sean liked it, too, I'm sure. Your father and I decided not to send you to school today. Is that okay?"

"Yes." Emily said, glad that she wouldn't have to be with a horrid teacher for at least one day.

"Your dad should be coming by, most likely by the time I leave to take Sean to school, though."

"Oh, he isn't staying home?"

"No, I guess he has to go to work. But I think you may need some time to talk with your dad, and if you want you can have Sean's room until he gets home."

"Okay." Emily wondered what her dad would be telling her. She gave the pillow another squeeze to relieve her feeling but just at that time, she noticed a towel clad Sean make his way to his bedroom. She couldn't help but laugh.

"He's a silly boy sometimes," Barbara commented.

"Most times," Emily corrected and laughed.

"But you like him."

"Yeah," Emily was unsure if it was all right to like him that way.

"Don't worry," Barbara said sensing Emily's dilemma, "You're a girl."

Emily smiled. "Yes. Yes, I am," she told herself reassuringly.

Barbara hugged her, and gave her a small kiss on the forehead. There was a knock on the door.

"Daddy," Emily yelped and headed to the door, tossing the pillow behind her where Barbara caught it. Emily opened the door and threw herself at her father who got down on one knee to catch her and hug her.

"Hi, sweetie." John murmured softly.

"I missed you." Emily gave him a big kiss on the cheek. They moved on into the room and hugged again, not saying anything for a moment.

"Well, I have to take Sean to school," Barbara said as she and Sean made their way to the door.

"Thanks again," John said, standing up but still holding Emily's hand.

"Have a good day at school," Emily told Sean, "I'll be waiting for you when you get home." Emily grinned and blushed as she realized she had said that out loud and everyone had heard it.

Sean smiled and nodded to her, then headed to the minivan with his mother.

When the door closed behind the Mongomery's, John said, "Come on, sweet pea, we need to talk." They moved toward the couch.

Emily sat down. She braced herself for whatever the news might be.

"I guess there is no real easy way to put this." John said, stalling a little.

"Just tell me." Emily picked up the same pillow again and clutched it against her. It seemed to help.

"Well, you know mom has been having problems, and has been unwilling to get help."

"Yes." Emily said softly.

"The police think it's best that she not live with us until she does find help." John forced himself not to pace and sat down beside his daughter.

"Are the cops going to arrest her?" Emily's voice trembled.

"No, they could, but they are going another route."

"And--what about the baby?"

"He still needs mom, but the cops, and a social worker, will be checking up on him a lot to make sure everything is okay and he's not being hurt either."

"Won't I ever see him again?"

"Sure you will, and so will I. But he is so young, he still needs to be closer to Mom than to any one else just now." John did not feel certain about this but perhaps the police knew best how to handle this. He certainly felt out of his own depth.

"I guess." Emily didn't want to cry, thinking she might not see her little brother ever again, so she clutched the pillow even more tightly.

"I just wanted you to know," John stumbled on, explaining the inexplicable, "because--because when you get home--Mom isn't going to be there, and she isn't going to be allowed to be around you for a while if someone else isn't with her."

"I bet she is really mad at me."

"No, you did nothing wrong." John knew he had to say this right; he mustn't let Emily think any of this was her fault. "Mom just needs to get help and let's hope with all of this going on that she does get the help that she needs."

Emily frowned and looked down at the floor.

"It will be okay," John reassured. "We've got each other, and I'm sure Mom will find herself again."

"I hope she does it quickly." Emily said. Her eyes felt hot and she pushed the pillow away from her, wanting something more than inanimate comfort.

"Me too." John hugged Emily to him; they both were on the verge of tears and Emily was as much comfort to John as he was to her.

He started to speak and had to start over, he didn't want Emily to hear him choking on his emotions. "Listen, sweetie, I have to get going to work; I can't take today off, but I'm going to be looking into a new school for you."

"A new school, why?"

"I heard about that teacher's comments and all the problems you had, a change of scenery might do you good."

"Okay, make sure the teachers are nice though."

"Sure will. I'll make sure they're as nice as you." John gave Emily a peck on the cheek and another hug before standing up.

Emily walked her father to his car, her small hand in his. She wanted to go with him, but knew that his office was no place for children and that the bosses frowned on kids being there. She gave him one final hug and kiss before he went on his way. She stood at the edge of the driveway as he drove off and stayed there until he turned the corner.

Emily went back into the empty house; she turned on the television to see what cartoon she could find. She was flipping through the channels, not really finding anything, when there was a loud knock at the door.

Emily walked to the door and looked out through the little window--no one was there. She looked toward the street and saw her mom's car speeding away. Puzzled, she opened the door and almost tripped on a pile of garbage bags thrown down right on the front stoop. A note on one of the bags caught her eye.

She took the note and read aloud, "Dear homewrecking whore, I don't want your shit in my house while I'm still here. I hope you're happy, you ruined everything." The note was signed, "It doesn't matter because you're dead to me."

Emily stood in disbelief, staring at the note and the bags.

Barbara pulled into the driveway moments later and saw Emily standing there. She couldn't understand what could have happened for the child to look so shocked.

"Emily, what's all this?" Barbara said, waving at the garbage bags as she climbed out of her minivan.

Emily just looked around her, still trying to absorb what had happened and how all her possessions now lay in big black garbage bags at her feet.

"Emily?" Barbara said softly, she made her way through the bags and to the child.

Emily looked up at Barbara and her eyes filled up with tears that ran down her cheeks and dripped on the black plastic of the garbage bags.

"Emily, say something, what is all this?" Barbara asked, concerned, but she made sure she kept her voice low and soft. Emily's expression frightened her more than a little.

Emily still didn't answer; she just held the note up so Barbara could take it.

Barbara read the note quickly, then folded it and placed it in her purse. "Well, let's get this stuff inside and fold everything so nothing gets ruined." Barbara's practical streak came to the front; doing something that needed doing was better than doing nothing.

She picked up most of the bags; Emily was able to carry two. They want to the living room and went through the bags. In silence they folded up various items and put others on hangers. Barbara couldn't think of anything else to say and Emily spoke not a word, not even a whimper.

Emily came to a smaller bag finally. She could feel from the shape of bottom that it didn't hold clothing. She dumped out the contents onto the coffee table. A few dozen photos scattered across the glass tabletop. Emily noticed something was different about them. She held up one, it was a picture of her from a year ago. The difference was, that the photo used to be of her and her mother. But the part of her mother had been cut out. She looked at the other photos; all were the same, either a cutout of Emily from another picture, or a picture of Emily, with her mother cut out. Any family picture that had contained both Emily and her mom lay on the table, except one person was consistently missing from the photo.

Barbara saw what had been done; it took her a few seconds to determine what exactly it was. She looked up at Emily. The child's face showed no emotion. But when Barbara looked into Emily's eyes, she could see the pain. With each photo that she looked at, Emily's heart broke again and again.

"Emily?" Barbara touched the child's hand.

Emily slowly looked up and saw Barbara; for a moment, she had forgotten that she wasn't alone. She looked down at the photos again, then back up at Barbara. Without warning, she scrambled to her feet and sprinted into Sean's room, not wanting to be seen amidst the photographs any longer.

Barbara rushed into the room after her. She didn't see Emily. The window was still closed, so she knew the child hadn't gone out that way. Barbara stood still for a second, making sure she was as quiet as could be. Finally, she heard a small cry from the closet. Barbara slowly walked over and opened up the door. She looked down into the corner of the closet; an Emily-size shape lay hidden under a heavy winter coat.

Barbara took a deep breath. "Want to talk, sweety? It may make you feel better," she ventured.

No reply came.

"If you don't want to talk, want to sit with me and we can cry together?" Barbara searched for anything to say that might help.

Still Emily didn't say a word; only muffled sobs came from under the heavy winter coat.

"Can't I do anything? Please tell me?" Barbara knelt in the doorway of the closet, reaching out.

"Leave me alone!" Emily yelled through the sobs and the coat before Barbara could touch her.

Still unsure of what to do, Barbara decided to depend on Emily's own strength to pull her through this. "Fair enough," she said softly. "But if you need me, I'll be only a room away."

Emily stayed exactly where she was, hidden from the world, weeping out her heartbreak.

Barbara slowly stood up and walked out of the closet. She pushed the closet door almost closed behind her, figuring that would be what Emily wanted. She walked into the living room and put the pictures into a neat pile, something to do. She stared at them for a moment then called John but he hadn't arrived at work yet. Then she remembered that he intended to see the lawyers and social workers and look at the school and probably wouldn't go to work today, even though he had said he would. He hadn't wanted to worry Emily with all that had to be done.

After thinking for a bit, Barbara pulled out a card, one for the officer working Emily's case. She called him and told him who she was and what had happened. The officer thanked her. Fifteen minutes later, he arrived at the house.

"So, these are the photographs you mentioned." The officer said after Barbara showed him to the living room.

"Yes, poor child is taking it very hard." Barbara told him. She had just checked on Emily. The sobbing continued and the winter coat still concealed the victim of the worst mental cruelty Barbara had ever heard of.

The officer glanced at the mutilated photos. "Wouldn't you?" he asked.

"I suppose so. I suppose we all would. Oh, here is the note that came with her stuff."

The policeman read the note. "Sometimes I wonder why we don't make people get licenses for having children. Mind if I keep this?"

"No, by all means, I certainly don't want it.

"I suppose the child doesn't really want to talk."

"She is holed up in a closet, under a coat."

"Well, it's not that important that I speak to her. I'd like to say I will send a social worker over to talk to her, but I can't promise that one would be available right now. I don't want to take her away and frighten her more, she might have to wait a long time to talk to anyone." The officer sighed his frustration at the system. "She seems to trust you," he didn't ask a question but Barbara nodded anyway. "You may want to place a glass of juice or plate of food in there if she decides to stay a while. She may be too embarrassed to come out and ask."

"Why, she did nothing to be embarrassed about!" Barbara felt her temper flare and her voice choked up. "It's that woman over there, why I'd like to..."

"Ma'am, you might not want to finish any statement that you might be held accountable for." The officer said quickly.

"Sorry officer, I get so angry some times."

"So do I. Have Mr. Corsi contact me when he can, thank you."

The policeman left and Barbara followed his advice. She made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and poured some apple juice in a spill-proof container. She placed each inside the closet. The practicality of providing food and drink did a lot to make her feel better. She tried to coax Emily into talking, but the child didn't reply. The crying sounded a little softer, but the coat stayed over Emily's head.

"It's a shame that such a beautiful child is hidden, it would surely brighten my day to see her." Barbara gave one last try. Emily made no appearance, though.

At one thirty, John called Barbara to see how everything was going.

"It's not that good." Barbara told him. She had thought a lot about what to say and still didn't know how to tell John.

"Emily isn't misbehaving is she?" John asked.

"Oh no, but your wife certainly is."

"She didn't show up, she isn't allowed," John began.

Barbara found the words to tell John what had happened. She told him about the garbage bags full of Emily's possessions and about the cut-up photographs. She told him how Emily had hidden herself in the closet under a coat.

"That bitch." John finally yelled into the phone overcome by his own feelings. "Oh, she is going to get hers..." He had never before contemplated striking his wife but found himself wishing Vivian were in range of his fists.

"Calm down, John," Barbara pleaded. "Don't do anything rash."

"Calm down? Calm down! Calm down? How can I calm down, why would she do something like that, what is she trying to do, destroy the child?"

"I don't know. But I do know that Emily needs you, and if you go and do anything rash, if you give her anything to use against you, I think it's obvious she will use it."

John struggled to take a breath, to get his voice under control, to stop trembling with his anger. "Well, what do I do then? I've let so much slide by, do I let this slide by?"

"No, call the police, the officer wanted to get in touch with you. Let them handle this, not you." Barbara had thought this part through, the only practical thing to do it seemed to her was appeal to the authorities.

John sighed. "Let me blow off a little steam," he said more calmly. "I'll go there and talk to them in person, it'll give me time to drive some of this anger out."

"Okay, you do that." Barbara thought John level-headed enough to be safe behind the wheel, even after such a shock. Still, she warned him, "Be smart, be safe, don't drive until you stop seeing red. Okay?"

"Okay, bye." John hung up his end of the phone.

Barbara waited another half an hour then went back to the closet and tried one last time. "Emily," she said softly, "I'm going to pick up Sean, I'm sure he will be glad to see you."

"No one wants to see me, I'm worthless." Emily finally spoke, her voice muffled slightly by the coat.

"Why would you say such a thing, honey?" Barbara's heart ached for the child but at least she was talking.

"It's the truth."

"No it's not, you are a very special, valuable person."

"How am I valuable when my mother doesn't even love me." Emily sobbed.

"Your mom evidently don't know what she is missing and is having a lot of problems inside of her." Barbara stumbled on her words, not wanting to excuse Vivian's actions.

"It's got to be me, no one wants me." Emily sounded so desperate, so forlorn.

"Now that's out-and-out not true. Lots of people love you and want you."

"Who?"

"Your dad, for one?"

"He has to love me, he's my dad."

"What about me and Sean?"

"I guess."

"What about little Jessie? She likes you, too."

"I hardly see her now that her dad has custody." And that still hurt; Jessie had been her special friend who now had family problems of her own.

"Doesn't mean she doesn't like you," Barbara pointed out.

"No."

"And what about Becky and Rachel, didn't I hear you say they were friends too?"

Emily pulled the coat from her head; her eyes were red and puffy, her lips swollen and raw where she had bitten them. "Okay you got me," she admitted. "But it still hurts, hurts bad."

"I know. It hurts me, too. But, some times you got to let certain people go, and just hope they come back when they get better."

"Like Mom?"

"Yes, like your mother."

"I don't think I can let this go."

"I can't answer if you will or won't, only time will tell."

"You know what?" Emily asked.

"What?"

"Forget her, if she don't want to love me, just forget her, who needs her." Emily cried again as she said the angry words.

Barbara didn't know how to reply. She didn't want to tell the child to forget her own mother. She knew that it hurt Emily to even say those words. She also knew that for now it was probably the best thing for Emily not to be around such a person. Barbara just knelt there and opened her arms, allowing Emily to fall into them. Barbara hugged the fragile child and gently rubbed Emily's back.

"Thank you." Emily said softly.

"For what, sweetheart?"

"For being here." Emily wiped her eyes on Barbara's blouse.

"I will be here whenever you need, it's a rare privilege to be able to help such a beautiful, sweet, little girl."

Emily didn't smile, even though she wanted to. The pain inside her still hurt too much for Barbara's light reassurance to overcome completely.

"I know what," Barbara said, "let's clean you up and we'll go pick up Sean together."

"Okay." Emily agreed.

Barbara took the child by the hand and led her to the bathroom. She helped Emily wash her face, using special soap that helped make the face glow. It stung a little bit, but not really enough to hurt. Then Barbara helped Emily put on some lipstick, a light pink shade barely off her natural lip color; the lipstick would help protect Emily's lips where she had bitten them. Barbara finished with some light blush to bring out Emily's cheekbones.

"You look like a little doll." Emily's natural beauty took so little to bring it out Barbara reflected.

Emily curtsied, "Thank you, thank you very much." They both smiled.

Barbara quickly brushed out Emily's hair, putting it up in a nice ponytail then Emily went into Sean's room and put on a fresh pair of panties and a white sundress. In all of ten minutes, Emily went from shambles to shockingly cute.

"I'm ready." Emily said as she made her way into the kitchen.

"Absolutely gorgeous." Barbara smiled at Emily. "Let's go."

Emily and Barbara got into the minivan. They drove to the school and arrived a good fifteen minutes early. They sat in the school turnaround and talked.

"You think mom will ever get any better?" Emily asked.

"Let's hope so."

"Why did this have to happen, why doesn't she love me?"

"I don't think she doesn't love you," Barbara said cautiously. "I think she is having a lot of problems with herself and she is just taking it out on you."

"I wish she would stop."

"You and me both."

They sat there and listened to the radio then; Emily didn't feel too much in a talking mood. Finally, they heard the last bell ring. The front of the school soon bustled with afternoon activity as kids frantically ran out of the school as if a jailbreak were going on. Before long, Sean made his appearance. He climbed into the back seat of the minivan and Emily got out and back in to join him.

"Not wearing my jacket?" Sean said looking at Emily.

"It's only like 92 degrees out."

"Oh, yeah." Sean laughed. "How was your day?"

"I've had better."

"Oh, well I'm here to make it better."

"A little confident are we?" Emily teased; Sean's cheerful goofiness was just what she needed.

"Not just because it's me." Sean hugged her playfully. "I got news."

"What?"

"Charles and his cousin got suspended for a week."

"Really?"

"Yeah, the principal saw my black eye and asked me what happened, so I told him."

"Wow."

"Yeah, he called Charles in, and Charles told him he was only playing a joke. Well, the principal said, 'not funny,' and called his dad in. Charles was crying like a little baby."

"He deserves it."

"Yep, and everyone thinks I'm a hero for knocking out Chris' tooth."

"You are a hero, my hero." Emily wrapped her arms around Sean's neck and gave him a big wet kiss on the cheek.

Sean turned bright red. "Quit it, my mom can see."

Barbara laughed. "Take them when you can, hon, you just never know when you will receive another."

"Okay," Sean said and then slobbered back on Emily's cheek.

"Gross!" Emily squealed.

They arrived back at the Montgomery house. Emily and Sean cuddled on the couch while Sean told her about the day's events. They watched some television afterwards and had dinner at five. About that time, there was a knock on the door.

"Hey sweetie, how you doing?" John asked as he came in and sat at the dining room table with her.

"I was bad before but I'm okay now." Emily didn't really want to tell him what had happened.

"I need to talk to you about something." John said as Barbara beckoned Sean to leave the room so they could be alone.

"What's wrong?" Emily asked.

"It's Mom." John searched for a way to put things gently.

"What happened, tell me?" Emily had to know even though she was afraid of finding out.

"Well, you know she was having a lot of problems...well, she left; left for good I think."

"I thought she had to leave, to get help and stuff?"

"That was the plan," John nodded. "But I don't think that was her plan."

"What do you mean?"

"Well she left me a note, saying she couldn't deal with the situation. The cops went by the house after they found out about what she did this morning."

"And?" Emily asked.

"She wasn't there. They waited for a few hours and she never did come back."

"Where is she?"

"No one knows, they found her car at the airport, she must have taken a flight somewhere."

"Didn't they try to find where?"

"They are trying to, honey, I doubt she used her real name so tracking her may be a little tricky."

"What about the baby?" Emily sniffled, thinking how much she was looking forward to helping with the baby, and how scary it was to think of her mom alone with the baby.

"Mom took him, too; the police, the authorities, are going to do all they can to make sure he makes it home safe and sound though." John tried to keep smiling while saying this, not wanting it to frighten Emily all over again.

"I sure hope they find them," Emily said, "I hope Mom gets help and goes back to normal, but if she chooses not, I hope we get James back, I'll miss him too much if we don't."

"That's a mature way to look at it." John commended. Baby James's fate was out of their hands for the moment, and John had to worry about Emily right now, he had to make her feel better about herself. He had to do all he could to repair the damage Vivian had done.

"But to be honest, I do hope she gets her head better and comes back and we can be a normal family again." Emily continued.

"Me too, honey, me too." John hugged Emily, who was again on the verge of tears. Her father was not so very far from crying either. He would cry later, tears for his wife and infant son, tears for Emily and for himself.

"So I can go home and back to school and stuff?" Emily whispered.

"You can come home, about school though, I found one where the teacher would be a lot nicer if you want." John stroked Emily's back reassuringly while he spoke.

"It's not special ed, is it? I don't want to be with...."

"No," John said quickly, "it's a school for kids that are very bright, like you are. Kids who were so bright the teachers didn't know what to do with them."

"Cool." Emily pulled back a little so she could smile at her father.

He kissed her gently on the forehead. "I think so, too, sweetie. It will be very cool. Barbara and Sean have been loading your stuff back in the car, if you're finished eating we can go back home."

"Sure. Can I say bye to Sean first?"

"Sure, honey. I'll wait in the car." John watched as his daughter dashed off to look for her friend; their troubles for a moment far away, he thought again how lucky he was to have such a special little girl in his life.

Emily found Sean quickly, sitting in his room, a little sweaty from effort.

She paused in the door. "I'm going back home," she announced.

"So things are going back to normal?"

"I doubt things will ever be back to normal, not if you mean to be like they were before."

"I meant, not here, not staying with my mom and me." Sean felt a little sad but kept a smile on his face.

"No, I'll be home, with Dad." Emily couldn't smile just yet and didn't want to cry again so she kept her face neutral. She moved into the room and Sean stood up.

"Don't you want things to be like they were though?" he asked.

"Well," Emily stood directly in front of Sean, "for a time, there was nothing I wanted more than for things to be like before."

"What's changed?" Sean didn't get it yet.

"Me, and some things I can do." Now she did smile, thinking of what she wanted to do, what she could do now.

"Like what?" Sean asked.

"Like this," Emily mustered her courage, moved closer quickly and gave Sean a kiss on his lips. "See, I wasn't able to do this before."

"I'd say." Sean blushed and smiled.

"It's nice to be a girl, and even though some bad things have happened since, I'm glad it did, that I became a girl."

"Why?"

"Well, one, I found you as a boyfriend, but even more, inside, I found me."

Emily gave Sean a small peck on the cheek, left the room, and joined her dad in the car.

"Saying goodbye took you a while." Dad said.

"I said other stuff, too," Emily grinned.

"Well, life is going to be different, going to be new." John said.

"Yes, a new life. Emily and Dad, and their new life; think we'll make it?"

"Sure we will, I'm strong, you're strong. We'll do just fine."

"You got that right, let's go back home and get this new life started." Emily smiled slightly as her dad pulled out of the Montgomery's driveway.

The End

 

This is the end of the series, but not the end of my writing. It is not the end of Emily either, just of me writing about her. I like stories that end at a beginning, mostly because if I get a movie deal out of it I can also get a sequel. :o) I chose to end it here, because it was at a new beginning for Emily and each of you, my readers, can decide where things go from here. Is she a better or worse person for all that has happened. I don't know. Are any of us better or worse for the events in our lives?

  

  

  

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