How Life Can Change

by Little Katie

Chapter XVI

 

A wish can become a dream and a dream can become a wish...

Wet Dream

 

Emily sat in the front seat of the car, making sure that the seat belt was secure. She still didn't like the idea of driving, but knew it was a necessary evil.

"Hey, Kiddo, how you doing?"

"I'm okay, I think I'm happy."

"Well, you certainly look that way; well, after the shock of seeing little James."

"I didn't think they were that small, and pink."

"Well, now you know."

"I wish I could get one when I was older."

"Well, you can."

"Mom says I can't."

"Well, who knows what will happen in the next couple of years. Plus, there is always adoption."

"Yeah, I'd make some little baby very lucky."

"Not as lucky as I am." John patted Emily on the head and started the car. Emily smiled as soon as she caught onto the compliment.

"Don't go messing my hair, you silly boys always want to muss something up." Emily laughed as she playfully scolded her father.

"Okay, I promise. Anyway, we have the whole day to ourselves, and no one else."

"Yeah, we do, don't we," Emily realized that they would be together, for at least one night.

"Well, how about we have a daddy-daughter day?"

"What's that?"

"Well, it means we get to do things together, just us. And, if you like it, we can do it once a month, just our special day."

"That would be great," Emily said with unbridled enthusiasm, grinning ear to ear. "I already know that I will love it."

"Great, because I already have things planned and if you said no, I would be stuck."

"Where are we going?" Emily asked.

"You'll see. Trust me."

Emily sat back and looked out the window as they crossed over a bridge leading into the city. The weekend traffic was light and the drive was filled with light hearted conversation and light pop music emanating from the car stereo.

"Well, here we are." John said as he parallel parked the car.

"Book Kingdom?"

"Yes, I know you like to read, and we haven't gotten you a new book in a while."

"Okay, cool."

John got out of the car, went around to Emily's side and let her out. She had grown accustomed to having her dad open the door from use. Before the accident had happened, John Jr. would of raced to get out of the car before dad even opened the door. John put his arm around Emily's shoulder and they walked step by step to the entrance of the bookstore. John opened that door for Emily as well, and Emily thanked him politely.

John made his way to the automobile section, always looking for a new book about old cars. Emily walked over to the juvenile section. She looked at books that she was familiar with. None really appealed to her anymore.

"May I help you," An older lady asked Emily as she stocked the shelves.

"I don't know, I am looking for a book, but none of these look like I would like them."

"Well, these are really written for boys, us girls need something a little more intellectual, don't we? These are all about cars and war and sports and all that ghastly nonsense." The old lady gave a wink.

"I guess, where are girl books?"

"Look at this rack right over here, these should be more appealing." The lady turned Emily's shoulder to a rack that was behind her.

"Baseball ballerina, this one looks good."

"Yes, it is, it may be too easy for you though."

"Oh, yeah, maybe."

"What kind of stuff are you looking for."

"Well, do you have one of maybe, where a boy becomes a ballerina?"

"You must really hate a boy to want that to happen."

"Huh, why?"

"Well, any self-respecting boy would never become a ballerina." The old lady replied.

"Really?"

"Yes, a boy would rather die than become a girl. Well, unless there was something really wrong with him and he was sick in the head."

Emily looked down, saw the dress she was wearing. She wondered, "Am I really sick in the head for this stuff to happen."

John, overhearing the conversation, made a bee-line to the lady. He whispered something into the old lady's ear. The old woman covered her mouth as she whispered, "Oh." Then she looked down at Emily for a second, turned her nose in the air and walked away.

"What was that about, Dad?" Emily said quietly, in a shaky voice.

"She was just embarrassed because she didn't know what she was talking about," John leered at the old lady.

"Is she right, am I sick in the head?"

"No, honey, she is very wrong, you see Doctor Lee, he says you have a very healthy head." John bent to one knee and kissed Emily on the forehead.

"Then why did she say that?"

"Because some people aren't very bright." John said in a tone that was sure to be heard by others.

"It still hurts inside some," Emily frowned.

"Well, we can let a stupid comment ruin our day, or we can realize that it was a stupid comment and have some fun."

"I guess have fun."

"That's my girl," John emphasized, "So did you pick out a book."

"I kind of saw this one." Emily handed her father a small paper back book.

"Hello God, It's me Margaret by Judy Blume; any reason?"

"I don't know, it looks interesting and sometimes I say hello God it's me Emily, just so he remembers." Emily cracked a small smile.

"I'm sure he knows, how could anyone forget you?"

Emily's smile grew bigger and soon she forgot all about the insensitive comment. John and Emily walked hand and hand to the counter, the old woman watched as they approached.

"Pick out a bookmark, would hate to ruin your new book."

Emily twirled the display that held the bookmarks. She found a bookmark she liked. It was pink, with a ballerina dancing in the middle of it.

"Here dad, that's going to be me in the middle." Emily smiled.

John put the bookmark along with the other items on the counter.

"Did you and your, uhum, daughter," the lady snubbed her nose, "find everything you wanted."

"We did indeed." John stared at the lady as she rung the books up.

John paid for the books and told Emily to put them in the car. Emily left, knowing her dad was going to say some words that he didn't want her to hear.

"So," John said to the lady, "you are new here."

"Yes." The lady said as she pretended to do some work.

"And you have a problem with my daughter?"

"Sir, if you want to call 'that' your daughter, feel free to do so."

"Narrow minded people shouldn't work in an area containing such knowledge."

The lady snubbed her nose again as she dusted the counter display.

"Don't worry, when Mark and I go fishing next week, I will bring this up. I am sure he will like to know what kind of employee he has hired."

"Oh," the lady had a look of fear on her face, "you know Mark."

"Yes, and he simply adores Emily, too. Good day."

The woman had a look of shock on her face as John smiled back at her and then left.

"Did you yell at her dad?" Emily asked as her dad came up to her.

"No, I just told her to say hi to Uncle Mark for me."

"That's Uncle Mark's store?"

"Yes, it's his newest one."

"Does he know about this?" Emily tugged on her dress to emphasis her point.

"Of course, he does, he simply loves the idea of having a niece now."

"Does he still, you know, like guys?"

"Yes, and maybe he should teach you about how to." John smiled.

"Daddy!" Emily protested.

Mark wasn't really Emily's uncle, just a long time family friend that John knew from high school. Mark didn't come to the house very often, because Vivian vehemently disapproved of his lifestyle. But, John and he had lunch at least once a week, and John always showed pictures to keep him informed of Emily's growth.

"Did you lock the door?" John asked.

"Yes."

"Good, let's go for a walk."

"Can I go piggy back?" Emily smiled.

"You're a little big."

"Well, soon you won't be able to carry me at all, and you will go 'where has the time gone, I really miss the time I was able to give her horsey rides'."

"You know guilt only goes so far?" John smiled.

"Please?" Emily flashed him Bambi eyes, knowing he couldn't resist.

"Okay, hop on." John squatted and allowed Emily to hop on his back. She wrapped her legs around his waist and John latched his arms at her knees. Emily's arms went around his neck but held on just above his chest, so as not to choke him.

"This is fun, giddy-up!" Emily laughed.

"I'm just glad we aren't going far," John said as he went into a half jog, bouncing now and then to make sure Emily didn't slide off his back.

John carried Emily a few blocks and they arrived at Forest Park. A small street fair was being held at its perimeter. The sound of carnival music grabbed Emily's attention.

"Dad! They got a carousel, can I go on?"

"Certainly, hop down and we will go get some tickets."

Emily got down and the two waited on line to get a ticket for the ride. The wait wasn't too long. John paid and then handed the ticket to Emily.

"Wait in line and I will watch from the side."

Emily did as her father said, she watched as John walked over to one of the game booths.

"Cool, maybe he will win me a teddy," Emily thought to herself.

"Hi, there," John said to the young college student working the booth.

"Care to try your luck, sir." The young man flashed a big phony smile.

"I use to work this booth to when I was in school, so I pretty much know how it works."

"Oh, well since you know the works," the guy winked, "how can I help you."

"See that girl over there, that's my daughter," John waved and Emily waved back. "Well, when she gets off the ride, I am going to buy five dollars worth of futility, and then when I pay for her shot, make sure she gets a winner," John nodded his head towards rings that sat in the corner of the booth.

"What if she still misses?"

"Make sure she doesn't, don't worry, I'll make it worth your while." John gave a wink to the guy, and they had an understanding.

John walked over to the gate, as he saw Emily being helped onto a carousel horse by the barker. She started the circle, going up and down and round and round.

"Hi, Daddy." Emily smiled and waved as she made her way around, "Bye daddy." She laughed her head off as she went away from him. She went around five or six times and the carousel came to a stop. She got off and ran to her dad.

"Have fun, honey?"

"You bet," Emily gave her dad a big hug. "Are you going to try to win me something big?" Emily smiled and tugged him to the booth were she saw him talking.

"I guess I have no choice, you'd just Bambi-eye me anyway." John teased as he walked to the booth.

"My, my, sir." The college boy laid the act on thick, "Certainly such a beautiful little girl deserves to win a huge teddy bear." He smiled down at Emily as she blushed.

"You are right, let me get five dollars worth of rings."

The man handed John the rings, and John made half-hearted attempts at getting a winner.

"Come on, Dad," Emily looked eager, "I know you can do it, I just know it."

John faked intensity, knowing that he had a plan already in place.

"Good try, close call," The college student edged on, "Last one, no good," he smiled. "Perhaps the young lady would have better luck."

"Want to try honey?" John asked.

"Yeah," Emily said eagerly.

"Well, let's try these rings, I think your father jinxed the last set." The man handed Emily the rings from the corner.

Emily threw the first ring and it bounced off the front of the target. The next ring did the same route. Finally Emily got one over the target; the way it landed wouldn't have made it a winner, but the man gently nudged it with his hip.

"We have a winner." he yelled and gave a wink to Emily, allowing her to think that he did it just for her. "Here you go beautiful little girl." He handed the big plush teddy bear to Emily, it was almost as big as she was.

"Good job, Emily," John complemented. "Why don't you go and order us some lunch and I will find a place for me and mister bear." John handed Emily a ten dollar bill.

Emily ran off to the food cart and ordered some hotdogs. John handed a bill to the college student as soon as Emily's back was turned.

"Sir, that's a hundred dollars, I think you made a mistake."

"Like I said, I worked this, too, make sure you use it for something useful, like a kegger, don't go wasting it on books." John winked, knowing that it was what was the most likely.

"Thank you, sir," The guy beamed.

"By the way, give me a futility." John used the name for the rings he had used.

"Certainly, here you go, sir."

John closed one eye, and threw the ring with some slight flip of the wrist, the ring nestled on the peg and slid down perfectly.

"Works every time." John smiled as the guy looked on awestruck.

"We need more customers like you."

"Have a good time," John walked away and went to Emily. They each had a hotdog and a soda. They spent the rest of the day going booth to booth. Emily got a caricature done and her face painted. All in all a very full day, and John held onto the stuffed bear the whole time. By the time they reached the car to go home, the full day was spent.

John opened the door to the house and let Emily walk in before him. She almost stumbled and fell because the large stuffed bear that she was carrying was almost as big as she was.

"I told you I would bring that in." John playfully teased, never being the one to squelch a child's need for independence.

"I got it," Emily replied. "Besides, its mine, I won it. I think I will give it to baby James." Emily put it down on a kitchen chair and made it sit with them.

"That is right, even though it may have been cheaper to of just buy it." John pulled out a chair and allowed Emily to slide in before he sat down close to her.

"Well, if you would of let me go first we wouldn't of had to wait your bazillion turns."

"Yeah, you liked that you beat your old man at something, don't you?"

"No, the guy let me win, I saw him change the rings."

"Guess he was no match for such a pretty face."

Emily blushed, "Is everyone going to treat me different now that I'm a girl?"

"Probably, honey, it's just one of those things. Don't you treat boys different then girls."

"Well, I got to. With boys you always have to watch out, they can get a goofy attack at any moment."

"I suppose so, is that a bad thing to be treated different?"

"If you would of asked me last week, I would of said yes, but since I was born a girl now, I think it's pretty cool."

"Well, I think you are pretty cool, too."

"So are you."

"Mrs. Montgomery must have worked some magic on you."

"What do you mean?"

"It's not that you aren't the same person, but there is something different about you."

"Well, the war is over."

"What war is that honey?"

"The war inside me, I felt like I was going to be ripped apart."

"But now that you were born a girl you don't have that problem?"

"Nope." Emily smiled big, and then blew bubbles into a glass of soda.

"So, you know school starts soon."

"I know, it's going to be weird."

"Well maybe we can start you back at kindergarten."

John teased.

"Daddy!"

"I'm just kidding. Are you looking forward to it?"

"Well, I guess, I just wish I knew what people are going to think about me."

"Probably that you are a wonderful person."

"You think so?" Emily asked.

"I know so, and you will have all your friends in the class."

"I hope I sit next to Becky and Rachael, I bet they would help me a lot."

"Well, maybe I can talk to the teacher and arrange that."

"That would be cool."

"How about Sean, don't want to sit next to him?"

"He gets weird sometimes."

"How so?"

"He kissed me on my lips. Yuck." Emily made a funny face of disgust.

John laughed, "You are a very pretty girl, I guess he couldn't resist."

"Mrs. Montgomery said that a lot of girls my age don't like boys yet. Do you think I ever will like boys like a regular girl does?"

"Well, I guess when the time is right you will decide for yourself. Don't rush things before they need to. And besides, whatever you choose I will always love you and be right behind you."

"Thanks, Dad." Emily got up, threw her arms around her father and gave him a big wet kiss on the cheek.

"I must say, I do like the rewards to having a daddy's girl though." John gave Emily a kiss back.

"I hope I don't spoil you." Emily giggled.

"Spoil me, spoil me." John said as he gave slobbering kisses all over Emily's face, causing her to burst out in a fit of laughter, kicking her feet as she tried to escape Dad's grasp.

"Quit that," Emily playfully slapped her fathers face.

John did stop on command, but kept his arms around his daughters waist. "So have a good, full day?" he asked.

"Yes, it was a lot of fun, and the fair was cool."

"Tired, or do you want to stay up and watch the news with me?"

"Wel,l I think I want to stay with you. Can you forget the news and read me a bedtime story. Please?" Emily pleaded as she gave her father Bambi eyes.

"You're getting good at that, how can I say no to that face." John grabbed Emily by the chin, causing her lips to look like a fish. He leaned down and gave her a kiss on the forehead and then gave her an Eskimo kiss to boot.

"Carry me." Emily sweetly commanded.

"Okay, I suppose I can." John stood up. "Jump up."

Emily hopped up and her father's forearm braced her buttocks. He carried her up the stairs and into her room. When they got to the bed, Emily pushed off and floated down to the bed.

"I'll be right back, while you get undressed, I will pick out the book." John wanted to establish that it was probably the most appropriate thing that he was not around as his daughter stripped. He also didn't want her to be self-conscious about her body, but he still had to adjust to the fact that he did have a daughter. Many people would question his intentions, no matter how innocent, about being with his daughter while she undressed. He worried about his wife and that perhaps the whole family would be viewed as a result of her actions.

Emily sat on her bed, not knowing that anything was amiss, unbuttoned the front of her dress and neatly laid it across the chair. She removed her undies and threw them into the hamper. She pulled down her covers and got under the sheets. She propped herself on the pillow and waited for her father to return.

"Dad," Emily called out, "I am ready."

"Coming," John said as he made his way to the door. He walked in and was relieved that his little girl was decent. Though he could tell that she was still sleeping naked, at least she was using better judgment.

John read a chapter out of "Hello, God, It's me, Margaret." He had purchased the book during the day outing. It was a much different type of story then what he was use to reading. He knew soon he would be going back to the old classics of the Three Little Pigs and Goldilocks, reading to baby James.

John finished the first chapter and put the ballerina bookmark at the start of the second. "Hon, even though the baby will be home soon, let's not give this time up, okay? This will be our special time, if you want."

"I would like that very much, I love spending time with daddy." Emily crinkled her nose.

"And I love spending time with my little girl, I love you, get a good night's sleep. Either tomorrow or the next day, Mrs. Montgomery is going to take you school shopping."

"Great," Emily smiled as she received a peck on the lips from her dad.

John slowly backed out of the room, gently closed the door.

Emily looked out of her bedroom window, she saw a single star dancing in the small opening between the curtains.

"I wish I may, I wish I might, make me a complete girl tonight and let me forget any boy things left." She said in earnest.

Emily laid her head back on the pillow and fluttered her eyes. She thought about the busy day. About making breakfast and walking hand in hand with Sean. She thought about seeing her little brother for the very first time and the amazing smallness of a newborn. She thought about the bookstore and the desire she felt to get a different kind of book. One that didn't deal with sports or pirates or fighting, something that just dealt with people. She thought about happening onto to the street fair, as if totally by accident. About how the guy in the booth winked at her as she was handed the rings and how he accidentally nudged the ring so that she won. The thoughts still danced in her head as she drifted happily to sleep.

 

An hour or so must have passed, Emily wasn't quite sure how long had gone by. The sound of the door making a creek startled her.

"Did I wake you baby?" John asked.

"No, Daddy, I must of fallen asleep."

"I know, you didn't even get out of your dress."

"Oh," Emily blushed.

"Well, don't you think you should get out of it, before it wrinkles?"

"Yes, would you help me?"

"Sure, I don't see why not."

John walked over to the bed, Emily was laying on top of all her covers. He slowly bent down and unbuttoned the denim blue dress. The buttons were easily accessable, seeing that they were on the front. He slowly and methodically unbuttoned, going from top to bottom. When he was done he separated the two sides of fabric, revealing Emily's naked body.

"You weren't wearing underwear, today?" John asked.

"I must of forgot."

"Well, that's okay, I guess. I must say, you make a great looking girl, I'm glad you were born one."

"Am I a complete girl?"

"I guess so, why wouldn't you be?"

"Because I don't like boys."

"How do you know, have you ever been with one? You never even tried."

"Can I try?"

"Sure, I wouldn't stop you."

"Can I try with you. Can you make me feel like a girl?"

"What would you have me do?"

"Kiss me like you kiss mommy."

"Is that it?"

"No, make me feel like what it means to be a girl."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, this way I know, okay." Emily gave her father the Bambi eyes again, knowing he couldn't resist.

"Okay, honey." John sat on the edge of the bed and helped Emily sit up. He slowly leaned down and gently gave her an open mouth kiss. Emily kissed back, feeling her toes try to curl into her belly.

"How was that?" John asked

"Wow," Emily's face got red and hot.

"Did it help you decide?"

"No, do more?"

John reached down and kissed Emily again, this time his hand rubbed against her legs and caused them to separate.

"Want to know what Mom and I thought Jessie was doing with you?"

"Yeah." Emily said with great enthusiasm.

John crawled between his daughters legs, and he began to give little kisses on top of it. He then gave it a grown up kiss. He made the area all sloppy and wet.

Emily laughed. "Wow, I guess that does feel good."

Dad blew into it, causing Emily to moan.

"Feels good honey?"

"Yes, Daddy. Can we have sex?"

"Sure." John pulled off his pants.

Emily laughed, "Just like I use to have."

John climbed on top of Emily and put it in. It was a perfect fit.

"Yes, Daddy, Daddy." Emily cried out over and over. Enjoying every minute of it.

She felt his hands on her back shake her back and forth.

 

John looked down on his little girl struggling in the covers. He had heard her call out in the middle of the night.

"Wake up, sweetie, wake up."

Startled, Emily gasped for air, sat up, and looked around like she was lost.

"You okay, honey?"

"Huh, daddy?" Emily tried to get her bearings.

"You were having a bad dream, it's okay, Daddy is here."

"Oh yeah, a dream." Emily felt embarrassed, knowing that it wasn't a bad dream at all.

"Daddy is here, want to talk about it?"

"No, it's over, I think I'll just go back to bed."

"Okay, if you say so. If you need me, just come into the room."

John closed the door but left it open a crack.

"Wow, maybe I do like boys." Emily wondered to herself.

  

  

  

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