How I Spent My Summer Vacation

by C. Sprite

 

Chapter Fifteen

 

Standing in the doorway, with her mouth opened in shock, was my mother. George released me immediately and took a step back. I stood there, like a startled deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car.

	I stood there, like a startled deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car.

George said, nervously, "How do you do, Mrs. James. I'm George Compton. I'm very pleased to meet you."

Mom looked from me, to George, then back again, but never said a word. After a period of embarrassing silence I said to George, "You'd better go. I'll call you tomorrow."

He nodded silently. I know he was disappointed not to spend my last evening in town with me, but he didn't let it show very much. He said, "Good-bye, Mrs. James. It was a pleasure meeting you."

If the situation wasn't what it was, I might have found his last remark amusing. Mom and I stood there until his car was almost out of sight, then she backed away so I could step past her into the house. She had closed her mouth and was now looking at me with an expression I couldn't define. I stood there for a few seconds, picked up my purse, and then stepped into the house, stopping about ten feet inside with my back to Mom and my head down. I heard her close the door and come up behind me. There didn't seem to be any anger in her voice when she spoke, giving me hope that my life wasn't over.

"On the day you left, I joked about sending a daughter to visit Aunt Sharon and Uncle Bob instead of a son, because of your hair length. I never expected you to take me literally."

I looked around for support, but there was none. I knew that at least one of my cousins had to be home for my mother to have gotten into the house. I didn't know what to say so I said nothing, and Mom stepped around in front of me. Because of the five-inch heels I was wearing, I was inches taller than she, but I felt like a small child under her gaze. She reached up and pushed my hair aside, examining my face and ears, then stared at my chest.

"I know that you didn't have time to grow breasts. Did you get implants, or are they fake?"

"They're breast forms," I replied.

She nodded and reached out, feeling their weight and substance. "They're attached to you?"

I nodded. "By a special adhesive. They have to be removed every two weeks, cleaned, and reapplied."

"They feel very real. Does anyone know they're not?"

"Just Lizbeth, Nicole, and Suzanne."

She ran her hand down my side to my hips, and stared at my skirt and shoes. "Which bedroom have you been staying in?"

"The spare bedroom off the kitchen."

"Show me," she said.

I walked to my bedroom, with her walking a few feet behind. As we entered the bedroom she said, "You walk on those stilts as if you've never worn anything else. Is this your bedroom?"

I nodded.

Walking to the makeup table, she looked at my cosmetics, and then turned to the dresser. Starting with the top drawer she examined everything she found there. She looked through my panties, bras, corsets, slips, padded control briefs, garter belts, stockings, and nightwear. My jaw dropped as she opened the bottom drawer and pulled out the photos of me at the dance. I knew I should have destroyed them, but it was too late now.

She looked at each photo carefully, and then looked at me. "You?" was all she said.

It was obviously me, so lying wouldn't help. I nodded.

"You've kissed more men since you've been here than I've kissed since your father deserted us."

She put the photos away and moved to the closet. Opening the bi-fold doors, she took a step back, her astonishment apparent. "Are these all yours, or do your cousins use this as an extra closet?"

"Mine," I said.

I stood there with my head down as she looked at every skirt, dress, and blouse. At least the clothes from the boutique had been returned. She paused her perusal when she got to the fifties gown. Taking it out, she held it against me.

"How on earth did you ever get into this?" Looking at it more closely, she added, "How on earth did you dance in this, or even walk in it?"

"It wasn't easy, especially with the five inch heels."

She shook her head slightly and put the gown back in the closet, continuing her examination of the rest of my clothes, including my shoes and pocketbooks. Closing the doors, she asked, "Where are your jeans and tee shirts?"

"The bus company lost them."

"You mean that you've been dressing like this since you arrived?"

"Only since the second day."

"Was that your boyfriend outside?"

"George? Uh, yes. I guess so."

"How many others are there?"

"None."

"What about the pictures?"

"That was the first weekend I was here. George has been the only one since then?"

"Are you gay?"

I looked up sharply, and then lowered my head again. "I don't know. I haven't been with any other girls since I became one."

"Girls? Became one? You mean…?"

"Mean what?"

"Have you had an operation?"

"Oh. No. I still have that."

"That's the only way that you can become a woman."

"Is it? For the past three months I've lived every minute of every day as a woman. A few square inches of unsightly flesh, and different plumbing hasn't seemed to make much of a difference."

Mom looked at me for a few seconds without saying anything. Finally she said, "It's true that being a woman is much more than just having breasts and a vagina, although genitalia is usually the key reference for defining gender. Do you really feel like a woman?"

"It's the only way I've thought of myself for months."

"Do you like boys? I mean, do you feel attracted to them?"

"I didn't before."

"But you do now?"

"Only George. I haven't been attracted to any other boys."

"It sounds like you're in love with him."

"I like George a lot, but he doesn't know about me."

"That's a relief."

"Why?"

"You haven't had sex with him if he doesn't know about you."

"No, no sex, just kissing."

"How did you acquire all these feminine things? Did your cousins give them to you?"

"No, I bought them with my own money."

"But I only gave you two hundred dollars. You have thousands of dollars worth of clothes here."

"I got a summer job. Actually, I worked two jobs for part of the summer."

"You never mentioned that during our weekly phone calls."

"I-- didn't know how you tell you. My first job was working as a waitress for Nicole's catering service."

"A waitress? Is that what the uniforms in the closet are?"

"Yes. And the running style shoes."

"And what else did you do? Your clothes suggest that you were a prostitute, but I know that isn't so."

"I was a newswoman on the local television station, KBXF. I was on the air every night at six and ten."

"Newswoman?" Mom said incredulously.

"Well, I started out as the evening weather girl, but I got promoted to reporter, part time, and then I was made an anchor several weeks ago."

Mom was looking at me like I was mad, so I took my last paycheck from my wallet and handed it to her. She looked down at it and then walked to the bed and plopped down.

"How often did you get paid?"

"Weekly."

"And this is for one week?"

I nodded.

"You're getting paid five thousand dollars a week?"

"Only since I became an anchor. Before that I was only getting sixteen hundred a week."

"Only getting sixteen hundred a week?"

I nodded again.

Mom had been holding the check in front of her, but now her hand dropped to her side and her body slumped. "I only earn seven hundred fifty a week, and I've been with the company for four years. You come here and get a summer job that pays almost seven times what I earn. I suddenly feel very tired."

I walked over and sat on the bed next to Mom. "It was just a fluke, Mom, like hitting the lottery. A man saw me at the fifties dance and decided that I was right for the weather girl spot. If it hadn't been for that dance, I wouldn't be a girl now."

Sitting up straight again, Mom looked at me and asked, "What did the dance have to do with it?"

I had stuck my foot in it now. I couldn't tell Mom about taking the medication and my resulting punishment. "Lizbeth bet me that she could make me look so much like a girl that no one would know the difference. I lost, and she made me go to the dance dressed in that gown, and that started the ball rolling. Once I got the job, I was sort of trapped. The money was too good to refuse."

"Another of your cousin's pranks," she said, matter-of-factly. "Did you spend every penny on clothes?"

"What? Of course not! Most of the clothes came from a thrift store. I have to tell you that Lizbeth and Nicole are amazing. They got tons of great stuff for next to nothing, and then Lizbeth altered everything to fit me. Most of my money went into a bank account to be used for college, and I've saved almost twenty thousand dollars this summer. And a guy in the personnel office said that I'll get a lot of the tax money back if I only work fifteen weeks this year, once the deductions for income taxes are computed for a whole year."

"Twenty thousand dollars? Oh, honey, that's wonderful. I'm so proud of you." She put her arm around my back and hugged me. "I'm so proud of my wonderful daughter."

I smiled at her. "That's the first time you've ever said that to me."

"Oh, it is not. I've told you a lot of times that I'm proud of you."

"Yes, but you never called me your wonderful daughter."

"No, I haven't, but you never looked like this before. Honey, I'm proud of you whatever you are or want to be. It was just a shock seeing you as you are now. But I'm getting used to the idea."

"Don't get too used to it. I'm going to become a boy again now that I've finished my job at the station and I'm leaving town. The station manager wanted me to stay, and even tried to get me to move here."

"Was he interested in you?"

"You mean as a woman?"

She nodded.

"No, just as an employee. He felt that I was an asset to the station."

"Maybe he's responsible for the letter we got."

"What letter?"

"From the television station WQOZ. It was addressed to Miss Ashley James, and I thought it was for me because I used to sign my name as Mrs. James Ashley. I assumed they had simply mixed up the order of the names. Anyway, the letter said that they had received the demo tape from KBXF and that they were interested in interviewing you. After reading it, I thought it was for someone else and they had gotten the wrong address. I probably would have marked it 'Addressee Unknown' and dropped it in the mailbox but for the fact that they mentioned the name of the city where KBXF is located. It was just too much of a coincidence."

"I can't believe they sent a demo tape without telling me. No, I guess I can believe it. They were encouraging me to do it. I guess they thought they were doing me a favor."

"Are you going to the interview at WQOZ?"

"No, of course not."

"But with the money you can earn, if you're hired, you can go to any college you want. I can barely afford to send you to the state university, and only then with the help of the scholarship fund from the company."

"Mom, I can't work at a local station as Ashley Michelle James and attend school as James Michael Ashley. Somebody would definitely make the connection. Besides, I couldn't pass the insurance physical."

"How did you pass it here?"

"As a temporary employee I wasn't eligible for insurance, so I didn't have to worry about it. If I'd had, I would have tried to get Suzanne to help me out."

"Then Ashley Michelle James is about to disappear?"

"I have a plane ticket to Albany in that name for tomorrow. I'd intended to travel as far as Albany as Ashley, and then change to James before boarding the bus for home."

"Okay, but we'll travel by car instead."

"If I'm going by car, I might as well go as James from here."

"Nope, I won't hear of it. You can change before we get home."

"But why?"

"I want a chance to get to know the Ashley that everybody in this part of this state has known for the past three months." Looking at me closely, she added, "You really make a beautiful young woman. You must have inherited your looks from me."

I smiled at her. "Okay, Mom. I'll remain Ashley until we get near home."

"Thanks, honey. And now I think that I'm ready for bed. I drove straight through and I'm having trouble keeping my eyes focused."

"You drove straight through? From yesterday?"

"Yes, with the help of a dozen cups of coffee. Nighttime is really the best time of the day for long distance driving, if you can keep awake. Most of the other drivers on the road are professionals, and traffic is light."

"Do you want to sleep in here? I can sack out on one of the sofas in the rec room."

"No, thanks, dear. Suzanne has me all set up to use Sharon and Bob's bedroom. I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight, sweetheart."

"Goodnight, Mom."

As I prepared for bed, I laced myself into my sleeping corset. I would need to control my waistline for a couple more days.

 

Awaking early, I put on my robe, took a small plastic shopping bag from the closet, and went downstairs. Lizbeth, Nicole, and Suzanne, already dressed for work, were eating a light breakfast in preparation for leaving for the catering shop. As soon as I reached the bottom of the stairs they surrounded me and began pumping me for information.

"Come on, Ashley," Lizbeth said anxiously, "what did she say?"

"About what?" I asked innocently.

"You know exactly what I mean. What did your mom say about-- Jimmy not being here."

"Ohhhh!" I said dramatically. "Nothing much."

"Nothing much?" Suzanne said incredulously. "She just accepted your Ashley identity?"

"Uh huh," I said as I nodded. "She asked me to remain as Ashley for the drive home."

"She wants you to remain as Ashley?" Nicole said.

"She wants an opportunity to get to know Ashley. We didn't have much time to talk last night because she was tired from the long drive. The trip back will give her a chance to know Ashley, before she disappears."

"Will Ashley disappear?" Suzanne asked.

"She has to, if Jimmy is to come back. They can't share one body. It's an either/or situation."

"Why can't Ashley stay and let Jimmy disappear?" Lizbeth asked.

"Because-- Jimmy was here first and this body is more male than female."

"The body can be changed," Suzanne said. "Wouldn't it be better to be a beautiful woman than a pretty man? Life's not always kind to a pretty man."

"I can testify to that," Nicole said. "As a police officer, I helped a lot of pretty boys get to a hospital after they were beaten up by ugly bastards who either thought they were gay, or wanted them to be."

"There's lot of other reasons for Ashley to stay also," Lizbeth said. "How many reasons are there for Jimmy to return?"

"Stop," I said, "you're confusing me. I had it all worked out; I was going to school as Jimmy on Tuesday and then having my hair cut to collar length afterwards."

"Cut your hair?" Suzanne said. "When you arrived you refused to let me cut your hair."

"I can't be Jimmy if I have to look at Ashley's hair in the mirror all the time. It would be a constant reminder of her."

"Tell me, Ashley. Which have you enjoyed more, being Ashley or Jimmy?"

I thought for a few seconds. "That's not a fair question."

"Why not?"

"Because I haven't had the three of you back home with me; it's been just Mom and me. It's been great being here this summer, and staying with all of you. Oh, I have a something for each of you." I opened the bag I had brought down and gave them each a wrapped box. "It's just a small thank you gift for everything you've done for me."

They opened the boxes and looked at the jewelry items that I'd picked up during my last trip to the Mall. Lizbeth thought that I was buying them for myself. They cooed sounds of satisfaction and appreciation as they tried on the jewelry and we each shared a hug.

"Ashley is very welcome to come back next summer," Lizbeth said. "We'll miss her."

The others voiced similar sentiments.

"What about Jimmy?"

"Well-- he's welcome also, but Ashley would have a job waiting for her," Lizbeth said.

"What would your folks say?"

"I'm sure that Momma would love to have Ashley here, and Daddy usually goes along with anything she says," Suzanne said.

"I hate to cut this short but we have to get to the shop, guys," Nicole said. "Ashley, tell your mom that we're sorry we couldn't wait for her to get up."

"She'll understand. I'll miss you. Goodbye."

We hugged and kissed, and then Nicole and Suzanne hurried out. Some of the employees would be waiting outside the shop by now. I grabbed Lizbeth before she got out and said, "You owe me an explanation, remember?"

"About what?" she asked innocently.

"About why you made me into a woman."

Lizbeth glanced at the door, then turned to me and asked, "Do you remember my eighth birthday party?"

"Eighth birthday? No. Should I?"

"I had just gotten a new dress and I wore it for the party. I was so excited and ran to show you as soon as you and Aunt Valerie arrived at our house."

I was listening intently and only nodded.

"When I told you about my new dress, you made fun of me for being proud of a dumb dress, and called me a stupid girl."

I nodded again.

"That's it. I was crushed by your insensitivity. I promised myself that someday I'd get even, that someday I'd teach you to be more sensitive to people's feelings."

"You did this because of something that I said as an ignorant seven-year-old? Something so inconsequential that I don’t even remember?"

"It wasn't inconsequential to me."

I sighed, and grimaced to show my exasperation. "I was a baby; you were a baby. Are there any other ill feelings that you're still holding onto? Did I take your rattle when we were in a crib together, or anything like that?"

"No, that was all. I promised myself that I'd make you pay someday for making fun of me. At least that's the way this started. Within a couple of days I realized that I had gone too far and was ready to release you from the bet, but then other things started to happen. Nichol decided you had to be taught not to take drugs, and Suzanne felt that you really wanted to remain as a girl. Then you got the job at the station. So I agreed to keep up the pretense of the bet and help you be the girl you wanted to be. And now I have. By the way, I didn't make you into a woman; I just helped the woman inside you find her way to the surface. I have to go, hon, because Nicole and Suzanne are waiting. Bye." Lizbeth pulled away and started for the door then stopped and turned. "And you still owe me a favor. Anything I want, for having tried to reach George that night." She turned and ran out the door.

I thought about Lizbeth's words about helping the woman inside to find her way to the surface as I walked back downstairs. I took the daily vitamins that Suzanne had given me, now up to four tablets each day, ate half a bagel with cream cheese, and then went upstairs to bathe and dress.

 

Standing at my closet door I scanned my clothes, trying to decide what to wear. I had tightened my regular corset down until the sides touched, so I could wear anything in the closet, but I didn't want to appear too slutty in front of Mom. The trouble was that everything I owned had been altered by Lizbeth to almost hug my body like a second skin.

After pulling out then replacing a dozen different outfits, I finally settled on the light gray suede skirt and jacket set. I hadn't worn it yet because it because of the summer heat, but it was September now and the high temperature for today was only supposed to be in the mid-sixties. I selected a dark blue short-sleeved blouse, made from a Rayon material with the feel of silk, that seemed to go nicely with the skirt and jacket.

I was afraid the skirt would be so tight I wouldn't be able to bend over easily later, so I put on the matching, knee-length suede boots before wiggling my way into the skirt and tucking in my blouse. I didn't have too much trouble closing the back zipper, but Lizbeth hadn't left any room to spare and she'd barely left me enough room to walk. Sitting down at my makeup table, I worked on my face then did my hair. I selected a gold necklace from my jewelry box, with matching earrings, and added two small gold studs for the two other holes in my right ear only. I also took out a couple of bracelets, and a ring for each hand. After applying a little perfume, I stood and walked to the floor length mirror where I checked my appearance. Satisfied, I went back down to the rec room, although I had a job managing the stairs in the tight skirt.

Mom still wasn't there, so after working in the kitchen for a while I turned on the television and watched the Sunday morning political news shows. My time as a newsperson at KBXF had instilled a much deeper appreciation for the political situation in our country. I was always dismayed that there was so little attention paid to the situations outside our country, except when we were involved in a conflict. I wished there was a cable news station devoted entirely to world news that occurred outside the U.S., or that the cable providers would broadcast stations from English speaking countries outside North America. I guess the only solution is for each and every home to get its own satellite dish.

Mom came down to the rec room around eleven o'clock, after having bathed and dressed. "Morning Mom," I said, "no need to ask how you slept."

"Like the dead," she said, smiling. "I feel great. Is it too late for breakfast?"

"Nope," I said as I struggled to my feet and walked over to greet her. After touching cheeks with her, I said, "The kitchen remains open until all guests are served. What would you like? We have all the normal breakfast stuff."

"How about pancakes? I can whip up a batch in no time."

"Pancakes it is, but I'll whip up the batch. You just sit and relax."

"You?"

"What kind of daughter would I be if I couldn't make breakfast for my mother?"

"No, I mean, 'you cook now'?"

"I've learned a lot out here. I had to work most evenings, but I learned a lot from working at the catering shop for a few weeks, and helping out in the kitchen here. Now just sit and relax. The paper is on the table, or we can talk as I work."

"Let me help."

"There isn't much to do. We use a premix here for pancakes and waffles. All I have to do is add water and stir as the frying pan is warming up."

She reluctantly sat down as I put on an apron. Before starting to prepare the pancake batter, I poured her a glass of cold orange juice. The large square frying pan was ready by the time the mixture was free of lumps, so I put a little butter in the pan and poured four pancakes. We talked as I worked, and I told her about the different foods that I had learned to prepare. As soon as the pancakes were a golden brown on both sides, I flipped them onto a plate and carried them to the table, where the butter and syrup had already been placed.

"What about yours," she said as I placed the dish in front of her.

"I ate earlier, right after the other girls left for work, so I won't be hungry for a while. I fixed a lunch to bring with us; we can find a nice rest area while we're on the road, and stop to eat."

"I could get used to this," she said.

I smiled. "What time do you want to leave?"

"As soon as the dishes are washed. We have a long trip ahead of us. We'll go as far as I can drive and then find a room. I don't want to make another marathon run like on the trip here. I wish you could drive; we could take turns."

"I'm old enough now; you just have to teach me. It doesn't look so hard."

"As soon as we get back you can apply for a learner's permit and I'll take you out on weekends. If you learn to drive as quickly as you learn new video games, you'll be driving by October."

"Great. I can hardly wait."

"With what you've accomplished this summer, I think that you're ready for the responsibility. I wish that I could have seen you at work."

"You can. I'll put in a tape from this week's broadcasts."

While I washed the frying pan and wiped down the counters, Mom watched the news broadcast from Friday, the one where Don talked about my leaving."

"Wow," she said as the program ended, "I am so impressed. I can't believe that you've been so busy, and learned so much this summer. I am so proud of you, honey, that I can't find the words. Imagine, my daughter is a television personality."

"Not anymore. I'm just another television has-been."

"Only temporarily; I'm sure that you'll find another job. You're too good not to find employment again in the news business, if that's what you want. Everyone as great at something, and it seems that you've learned early what your forte might be. I understand now why the station back home wrote to ask you to come for an interview."

"It's been an exciting summer. Ready to go?"

"Yes. Do you want to change first?"

I looked down at my clothes. "No, I think that I look okay. Don't you?"

"Honey, you look better than okay. Now that I can see straight, you look even more beautiful than you did last night. I can truly understand why no one ever suspected you weren't born female." She hesitated for a second. "When I asked if you wanted to change, I meant do you want to change to Jimmy? I was a bit punchy last night and I realize now that I had no right to ask you to remain Ashley for the long ride home."

"Do you want me to be Ashley for the ride?"

"Well, it would be nice."

"Then Ashley it is."

She smiled and we hugged. "What about the video tapes?" she asked as we separated.

"What about them?"

"Are they yours?"

"Yes. A tech at the station made them for me."

"Aren't you going to pack them?"

"I hadn't planned on it."

"Well, if you don't want them, I'd like to have them. I want to watch them all."

"All?"

"All."

"Okay, there's a stack of boxes in the garage. I'll get one and we can pack them up."

After boxing up the tapes and carrying them out to the car, we prepared to leave. Mom got her suitcases from the upstairs bedroom and I got mine. As we were loading the car, Mom picked up one of my suitcases.

"Why is this so light?" she asked.

"It's empty."

"Empty? What about all your clothes and other things?"

"I left them for Lizbeth."

"Can she wear them?"

"Well, probably not the clothes. She altered them to fit me, and the waist is too small for her, unless she wears a corset. But she can take them to the thrift store where I bought them."

"Come on," she said. "Get some boxes from the garage. We have some packing to do. I refuse to leave a mess behind for somebody else to clean up. We can take them to the Goodwill back home, and not impose on your cousin."

Mom took my suitcases to my bedroom while I retrieved several more boxes from the garage, and she already had my suitcases packed by the time I got to the bedroom. She went through the closet like a whirlwind, taking things down, carefully folding them, and placing them into the boxes. One box was filled exclusively with shoes and pocketbooks.

"Don't you have any shoes with normal heels?" she asked. "Most of these are four inches, and the rest are five."

"Lizbeth wanted me to look sexy. She picked my shoes for the first month, and by then I had so many that I didn't need to buy any more. The same with my clothes and pocketbooks. The only stuff she didn't pick were the things that I got from the bus company, such as this outfit," I said, referring to the suede skirt, jacket, and boots.

"And even those conform the look she had created for you."

"The boots already had four-inch stiletto heels, of course, but the skirt allowed normal walking until she altered it. Now I have to move in exaggerated movements, like runway models."

"Can it be altered back?"

"No, she cut off the excess material after altering it."

"Too bad. It's an expensive and beautiful suit."

We finished boxing everything up, and taped them closed, then performed a final check of the room to make sure that it was as it had been when I arrived. Even the pictures of me kissing all those men at the dance had been packed away somewhere. I hoped that Mom had put them in one of the suitcases instead of the one of the boxes. I'd hate to see them wind up at the Goodwill back home.

"Okay," Mom said, "we just have to pack the car and we're ready to go."

"I promised to call George today. I just have to make this one phone call before we leave."

"You go call your boyfriend then while I start carrying things out."

George was home and picked up by the third ring. "Hi, George," I said. "I'm sorry about last night. I didn't know that my mom was coming out."

"It's okay, but it was a little awkward. I take it that you hadn't told her about me."

"Uh, no, I hadn't."

"Well, she knows now."

"That's for sure."

"When are you leaving?"

"We're packing up the car now. I just wanted to call and say goodbye."

"You can't leave yet. Wait for me. I'll be right over."

Before I had a chance to say anything, I heard a click and the line went dead. I replaced the receiver and carried a box out to the car where Mom was trying to squeeze everything in. The back seat was filling quickly.

"George is coming over to say goodbye," I said tentatively.

"Okay. It'll give me a chance to apologize; I was rude last night. I guess that I'm Mrs. James instead of Mrs. Ashley for a while."

I smiled. "Thanks, Mom. This is the last time I'll see him and I don't want him to know."

"I understand, honey."

We carried out the rest of the things and managed to get everything in the car. We had just finished when George arrived. I was glad that I didn't have to make Mom work alone.

George parked next to us and got out. Walking to Mom first, he handed her a bouquet of roses. "These are for you, Mrs. James. I'm sorry about last night."

"It's me who should apologize; I was very rude. I can only blame it on the shock of seeing my daughter kissing a boy, for the first time. She's only sixteen you know."

"Yes, ma'am. I understand."

"Now that I'm over the shock, you two have my permission to kiss goodbye. Thank you for the lovely flowers."

"You're most welcome, Mrs. James. And thank you for having such a beautiful and wonderful daughter."

George turned to me and handed me a bouquet like the one he gave Mom. "You heard your mother. I have her permission."

Permission or not, I didn't want to kiss right there in front of Mom, so after handing Mom my flowers to hold, I took George's hand and led him to a shady spot near the driveway. Mom could still see, if she wanted to, but we were at least hidden from the road. George wrapped his arms around me and pulled me tightly to him. I leaned my head way back and looked into his eyes, and as he lowered his head, he closed his eyes, as did I. The rest of the kiss would be done by touch. We kissed with closed lips first, but I opened my mouth as soon as I felt his tongue, and while he explored the inside of my mouth, I stroked his hair and toyed with his ears. I knew from experience that it always excited him when I did that, and today was no exception. The kiss must have lasted five minutes.

We finally parted and then hugged tightly for the last time.

"I'll write," he said.

"Okay. I'll watch for your email so I have your new address at college."

"I wish now that I wasn't going to Stanford. I would have found an East Coast school if I'd met you a couple of years ago. Harvard and Yale are only a couple of hours away from you instead of across the entire country."

"I'm glad that you got into the college of your choice. I'll have to start looking around now that I've decided to major in journalism."

"Maybe they offer that at USC."

"Maybe," I said tentatively, "but money is another consideration. I'll have to see what scholarship money I can get and what the restrictions are."

"Okay," he said grinning, "I just thought I'd plant the suggestion."

"We have to go. It's been a wonderful summer. I'll never forget it."

"Me neither, although I wish that we'd had more time together. Between you working nights and weekends, and me working days, our time was too limited."

We had walked back to the car as we talked, where Mom was sitting inside, pretending not to watch us. At the car door, I let George kiss me once more, but only for half a minute, then we separated and I got into the car as he held the door. He held my hand until the car started to move, and I waved to him until we were out of sight. I half expected him to follow after us as far as the interstate, but he just stood in the driveway and waved.

"Your boyfriend certainly is amorous," Mom said. "I can understand after seeing you kiss him. If I kissed like that, maybe your father wouldn't have left. You can give lessons after returning to school."

"That's where I learned to kiss," I said, smiling. "It's a popular topic among my girlfriends at the lunch table all the time. I just used what I'd heard."

"Will your boyfriend be coming to visit us?"

No, George is going off to college in California. Once he starts hanging around with beach bunnies, he'll forget about me in no time. He is a man, after all. I was surprised that he chased after me all summer; I expected him to seek out more open fields."

"You mean 'open legs'?"

"Yes, I was being polite."

"You can talk freely in front of me when it's just us girls."

"I think that George's continued affection towards me, while not getting into my panties, was what made me care for him so much."

"Friendship is more important than love, or lust. Friendship lasts long after the thrill of lovemaking with a partner has ended. You're still young, and there may be many more men in your life, but when you get ready to settle down, make sure that's it's with somebody that you really like. I know that you'll love him, but liking him is more important. Too many women, lured by excitement, marry bad boys and then wind up deserted or divorced in a couple of years. They learn the hard way that bad boys won't suddenly change and become good husbands and family men. Some women never learn and just keep marrying one bad boy after another. Remember that you can't change a man's spots. I know a woman who married her boss after he divorced to marry her, and then was shocked when he divorced her to marry his latest secretary."

"Why are men so fickle?"

"It's in the genes I guess. Monogamy just isn't a trait that's bred into men; it has to be learned. I guess I just wasn't a good enough teacher. I just wish I understood what a teenage girl saw in your father."

"Maybe she saw a father figure?"

"He wasn't much of a father. Was he?"

"Not to me."

"Why are we talking about your father? He's ancient history. Tell me more about your summer and your job at the television station."

We talked like that for hours; nothing of earth shattering consequence, just girl talk, and I maintained my female persona throughout. It wasn't difficult because Ashley had evolved tremendously during the months of pretense and I was so steeped in the portrayal that it wasn't really an act anymore. Unless I consciously thought about Jimmy, I was Ashley. Mom treated me as a daughter, and I responded as if I'd never been anything else.

We stopped at a rest area around four o'clock to eat the lunch I'd packed, and stopped for dinner at a highway truck stop for dinner. Ignoring the stares from the predominately male diners, we concentrated on our meals, but after eating, as I went to use the ladies room, I was quickly followed by at least a dozen men. I was relieved that I made it into the bathroom without being molested. The restaurant may have catered to trucker traffic, but it was still a family oriented restaurant, catering to car traffic as well.

It took me time to complete my toilet because of the tight skirt and control brief, and I was surprised to find most of my admirers still waiting when I came out.

"I have a great little love nest in my cab," one said. "How about you and I get it on?"

That started a torrent of such offers from the others. I backed against the bathroom door as the men crowded in, leering at my body. The tight clothes had obviously given them ideas about my morals. I screwed up my courage and moved forward, pushing my way through. They gave way slowly as I moved forward and I said, "Sorry, boys, but I'm not on the menu here." That drew a few more cleaver remarks, but I was through them by then and kept on walking until I reached the table, even though they followed me almost all the way back.

"The room cleared out like somebody yelled fire, when you left," Mom said, smiling.

"I know. They waited outside the restroom until I was done."

"I'm going to have to borrow some of your clothes, if I can figure out how to get into them."

"Wear a corset for months, suffering every minute, and it's easy."

"Have you suffered every minute?"

"Uh, no, not really. You kinda get used to it, I guess. At least you learn to ignore it after a while."

"I'm going to use the ladies room now, but I'm sure that I won't have an entourage with me."

I smiled. "When we get back we'll get you a new hairdo and some sexier clothes. You'll have to fight them off also."

 

About midnight we exited the interstate and found a motel that still had their vacancy sign illuminated. The holiday weekend had a lot of people traveling and we were lucky to get a room with two queen-size beds so we wouldn't have to share. I was thankful for the few minutes of freedom I had from the corset, while I washed up, then I struggled to put on the sleeping corset. Mom watched for a couple of minutes and then came over to help. It's much easier for someone other than the wearer to close down a corset, and I was securely fastened in a couple of minutes.

"Do you wear that every night?" she asked after I had put on my nightgown.

"It's the only way to keep my waist at twenty-one inches. When it's closed, my waist is actually between eighteen and nineteen inches, so then I don't mind the twenty-one inches of the regular corset throughout the day. If I don't wear it, I might not get into my clothes in the morning."

"Eighteen inches?"

"It's not too bad because I don't do anything that leaves me short of breath during the night. I wouldn't want to wear it during the day. I'd probably have too much trouble getting enough air with just ordinary exertion."

"Who decided that your waist has to be twenty-one inches?" she asked.

"Lizbeth," we said in unison, and then laughed.

"It got me the job at the station. I'm sure that my figure was important. You should have seen the other two finalists; both were knockouts. I only beat them out because they liked my test a little more."

"I bet you would have gotten the job if your waist had been a more normal twenty-five inches."

"I don't know. Anyway, it doesn't matter now. I still have to stay at twenty-one because all my clothes have been altered for that size."

 

The next morning I selected a black mini-skirt and burgundy blouse for the second half of our trip. We ate breakfast at a diner across from the motel and then got back onto the interstate. Mom estimated that we'd get home around five o'clock if traffic wasn't overly heavy, and we talked like mother and daughter all the way to Massachusetts. Mom told me stories about growing up that I'd never heard, and would never have heard if I hadn't become Ashley, because they were girl-to-girl stories. She had truly seemed to forget that underneath I was still a boy, but it was alright because I wasn't really a boy. For the ride home, I was her daughter, Ashley.

 

At five o'clock we were still about twenty miles from home, but the traffic had thinned out a bit now and we should be home in less than a half-hour. Mom pulled off the interstate and starting looking for a gas station.

"Do we need gas already?" I asked.

"No, we just need a restroom so you can change. Better get your jeans out of your luggage."

"My jeans? Oh, no."

"What's the matter?"

"I forget to ask Lizbeth for my jeans and tee shirt. I don't have any boy clothes."

"Oh."

Mom swung the car around and headed for the interstate again.

"What am I going to do?"

"Nothing. You have lots of jeans left at home. This week we'll pick you up some new ones to make up for the ones the bus company lost."

"But somebody will see me dressed like this."

"Who's going to know? People won't know that it's you. They haven't even seen you around all summer, and if anyone asks, I'll just tell them that one of my nieces came for a visit."

"But they'll recognize my face."

"They may see the family resemblance, if they look close, but that's all. I barely recognized you as my child when I saw you at Bob and Sharon's. If you hadn't said 'Mom', I might have thought you were Lizbeth. And I know your face almost as well as I know my own."

I hoped Mom was right, but there wasn't much that could be done now. I was just as likely to be recognized if we went shopping for jeans now that we were so close to home.

 

(continued)

  

  

  

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