Heaven and Hell IV: Balancing Act

by

Maggie Finson

Part 2

 

The Citidel was impressive, but what do you expect from the home base of a Prince of Hell? It was an aglommeration of structures sourrounded with a very high, thick wall, all made of gleaming, polished steel. A bit tacky in my opinion, but that's what it was, and it was obviously Lord Baal's choice. So I won't pick on that any longer. Miles of parade grounds surrounded The Citidel, empty at the moment becuase all the troops were off playing their war games. War games that I had a pretty good idea about the purpose of, and what they were practicing for.

Not that the place was deserted. Far from it. There were troops of Baal's elite, the Myrmidons, patrolling the emptied out parade grounds and the base of the massive walls. Given the numbers of those fighter types I could see, I inferred that Baal was at home. Something that was rare, and I swore to myself at the luck I seemed to be having on this mission. Not only had I been at risk from all the idiotic war games and their participants I'd passed on my way there, now I had a Prince of Hell in residence at His own stronghold. A stronghold, I might point out, that I fully intended to infiltrate.

Oh, did I mention that there was a flock of Hags flitting about the parade grounds and the interior of The Citidel? No? Well there were, which brought up a very uncomfortable question. If there were so many Myrmidons and Hags around the place, what was inside? And why were there so many gods be damned Hags there at all?

Answer? If you guessed that Baal had an inportant guest, and that guest was probably the goddess Mab, give yourself fifty points. I don't care what you do with the points, just don't come to me expecting to have them redeemed for anything. But you have them, for what it's worth.

Second question here. What kind of thrice damned fool would try to pry into things even further with the information so far gathered? Answer -- One Hell's Valkryie who knew she was in much deeper than was healthy already. In other words, sweet little me. Not for the first time since my conversion, I wondered why I had been stupid enough to let myself get killed in the first place, or Hadn't tried to escape once I discovered I was in Hell, or run for all I was worth when Lorilie and company had showed up to collect me, or... Oh, never mind, I think you get the idea.

Mouthing a silent prayer, more like a plea, to any god or goddess who cared to listen, for whatever help I might be able to get, I started searching the damned place for a way in that wouldn't set off umpteen million alarms.

It wasn't easy, the pile of metal Baal called home was very well defended from both physical and magical assault. I had to be very careful even with my probes into those defenses, which were so intertwined that tripping one would set off all the others. I did get an irreverent and pretty funny mental picture of some hapless mouse setting the works off by simply trying to get into the food stores the edifice contained. (And why bother with food stores when all the dinizens of Gehenna either got their nourisment in other ways, or needed nothing physically ingested to keep going?)

Once I penetrated the defenses, very carefully and slowly, as previously mentioned, I discovered the why for the food stores. Baal had a lot of Human recruits in residence. Not souls of the dearly departed, mind you, real, living, breathing Humans who all looked to be nasty customers even for most demons. What in (you'll pardon the expression, I'm sure.) The Hell was this guy planning here? A simultaneous assault on both the existing ruling structure in Hell and the Human Realms? It had to be something like that, since no matter how formidable those Humans were individually or as a group, the effect they would have during a battle in Hell could be termed as laughable at best. Down here, they wouldn't be facing individual demons but mobs of them. Up in the Human Realms, though...

Lord Baal had been a god of war in the past, but even for someone with his credentials, this plan was shaping up into something incredibly ambitious. If he was successful, not only would Hell be in his grasp, he would have The Human Realms in the palm of his hand as well. Which would mean Heaven would be very hard pressed to even maintain its own independence let alone contest Hell for anything. Hoo! This was turning into a real mess.

A mess, unfortunately, that I had found myself squarely in the middle of. And one that I just had to find out more about while doing my best to stir up and disrupt for all involved.

Well, no one told me being the very first Hell's Valkyrie was going to be either easy or pleasant all the time. I began to wonder if my sisters had brought in enough firepower. And worried that they might be running headlong into some sort of ambush that would be dismissed as a 'training accident' involving non-participants once it had happened. And I couldn't even send them a heads up type of warning considering where I was at the time. I just hoped Lor or someone had managed to get the message to them.

I gained access to the place through the sewers. Yuck! If you think sewers in The Human Realms are nasty, I'd suggest you take a look at the bowels of Baal's Citidel. You'd change your opinion rapidly, let me tell you. The leavings of domonic types combined with those of the Human occupants, and a lot of other really stomach churning items are not something I choose to describe even now. Let's just say I pitied the monsters who prowled that awful place and leave it at that. And could see why they had such bad dispositions.

I managed to get through that place without touching anything or being touched by anything either. (Thank you gods, thank you.) to emerge in the dungeons and court area. Take it from me, the dungeons weren't much better than the sewers, and the courts were at best, dismal places. I suppose that was all the better for those Baal and his cohorts decided were lacking or had transgressed. But I was quite happy not to be one of the poor souls (literally) on any of those dockets and made an extremely pointed mental note not to get caught and become one of them.

Oh, I started leaving my little surprise packages there. What packages are those you ask? Remember my packing all those satchel charges? Well, they weren't really what one would call conventional satchel charges. The plastic bags I left behind me, with detonators, were filled either with a version of C4 or thermite absolutely guaranteed to ruin anyone's day if set off. Considering where I had left them, that would be Baal, since the charges would completely undermine his precious Citidel if I sent the signal for them to activate.

The next level was marginally better. Courtyards, lower administrative areas, and receiving areas for recruited or co-opted souls are best designed to be not so forbidding while maintaining the inherent threat of being in Hell and subject to worse things than being assigned to Baal's Citidel. As it was there were thousands of weary souls oiling and polising the metal of the fortress to stave off rust and make the place gleam like the well kept monstrosity it was. I left a number of discrete packages there, as well, since the Humans Baal had recruited and brought down to impress were largely quartered in that part of The Citidel. Hey, if things went bad for me, I could at least make things really tough for his planned assault on the Human Realms, right? At least I hoped that would be the case if things went sour. I knew that Humans, no matter how favored by any Prince of Hell, would be vulnerable to that kind of attack.

I won't detail my further progress through The Citidel, other than to say I left enough well concealed charges to blow the place clear to Heaven if I set them off. And fervently wished I had brought more.

My final stop was a series of floors at the top that were inaccessible to anyone without wings or some means to fly. The corridors of that area were filled to near overflowing with senior Myrmidons and Hags. I could tell all the demon types present were the elite of the selected elite from badges, battle scars, and just the pure sense of power permeating those top floors. As a measure of their arrogance in power, the Hags hadn't even bothered to clothe themselves with illusion, and the Myrmidons were not the least bothered, impressed, or worried.

Wow, I was in it now. Making sure my own masking spells were not only intact, but strengthened while adroitly dodging some very clever (but substandard to my experience) search and find spells that would have caught a less experienced mage, I sought for the center of all this active guarding.

And much to my mixed regret and elation, found it.

Getting ready to sneak in, I activated my failsafe device for the event of my capture. Since they would know that I relied on magic, and would likely set things up to prevent my using it, I very fervently hoped they would overlook the purely mundane, flat little box with a single small button in it's center that I had palmed. A classic, dead man's switch. If I released the slight pressure of my palm against that little button, Every charge I had set would go off, and hopefully bring The Citidel down in ruins. Which, I fervently prayed, would give one little and very overmatched Hell's Valkyrie a slim chance to escape with a relatively intact skin.

Drawing in a long, careful breath then letting it out just as slowly (ok, ok, I was stalling. Now tell me you would have blithely snuck into the inner sanctum of one former god who was hosting a former goddess. I might even beleive you.) I very gingerly eased myself through one of the intervening walls and began to take stock of the situation.

 

* * * *

 

Lord Baal himself, and the Lady Mab were enjoying a leisurely snack of damned souls that were useless for much of anything else and discussing their plans for the future. I made myself very small, very insignificant, and even more invisible once I had found them in such a relaxed state.

Mab was beautiful beyond mere words. In a forbidding, chill way. Her features and form were as near perfect as anything in Hell could be, and that was without illusion. But her dark eyed beauty was the kind that anyone with a modicum of sense would run hell bent for leather to get away from. There was nothing of softness or mercy in that beauty, or of warmth. All I got from her were waves of freezing malice and a bitterly cold rage that would make the arctic seem like a child's picnic ground.

Physically, Mab was tall, lithe, and very well formed with the quintessential Sidhe beauty. Her elfin features were nothing short of breathtaking, even to one who could only get really excited by males, like I had become. But let me tell you this much. In life, I would have been her willing slave just to be granted a glimpse of her unspeakable beauty off and on. Long, thick midnight hair with highlights that looked like stars in the night sky, delilcate features that would have seemed more appropriate on a doll, and a form made to excite the libido of any male and most females pretty well describes the once goddess and ruler of the Hags.

Along with a radiated power that was cold enough to freeze even the inhabitants of the coldest, windiest part of Hell that existed. Mab was not someone to trifle with, or even cross paths with, if one could avoid it. A true Princess of Hell. And I was eavesdropping on a conversation between Her and a powerful Prince of Hell. Oh any gods but Mab and Baal, what had I managed to get myself into?

Baal was handsome as Mab was lovely. But his stocky, powerful form radiated heat and threat of actual physical harm. His Mediteranean good looks spoke of his origins in the cradle of Humanity, and called to me with a force I had to exert a lot of willpower to resist answering. If that one had been presented to my right after my transformation, I fear that I would have pledged my entire being to Him.

But the power He radiated was violence. Unending violence and destruction. Sure, I was part Hell Maid and part Succubus, neither of which were known for the gentler emotions like real love and nurturing, but this guy filled me with a sense of forboding and despair that more than outweighed any physical attraction He might have exerted on this little ol' Hell's Valkyrie.

Turthfully, once I had gained access to their private chambers, I was way too overwhelmed by the dual Presences to do much more than keep covering myself with masking spells and fight the irrational urges to throw myself at either one's feet to plead forgiveness for haveing the temerity to think I could do anything to halt thier plans. Sheesh!

Those chambers were spartan, but with enough sumptious trappings to satisfy Mab, who wasn't all that well known for her own love of luxury either. There were a lot of silk hangings, pillows, and two comfortable looking couches occupied by the pair as I listened to their conversation.

"So, all is in place?" Mab questioned idly as she delicately sucked at a screaming soul.

"Of course, my Lady," Baal replied between energetic chewing and faint screams of agony from his own snacks. "We will be the uncontested rulers of both Hell and The Human Realms once our forces have moved."

"It will be good to have that bitch Lillith on her knees in front of me, and to see her precious Lillim subjugated to me." Mab almost purred with anticipation of her coming glory. "Bringing the Lillim down is the major reason I agreed to assist you in this coup, my Lord."

"You've mentioned that several times," Baal appeared to be on the verge of letting loose with some scathing comment, but evidently thought better of it. "The alliance of your forces with my own is an important part of the overall plan, Lady. Trustworthy Allies are, at best, difficult to find in this type of endeavor."

"Just see that you hold to our bargain," Mab answered cooly, then smiled. "Home is to be Mine, with all rights and privileges of that holding. At long last, that insipid garden will be in hands that can mold it into something really worthwhile for Hell to claim as a Principality. Keep that promise my Lord Baal, and you will have a trustworthy ally at your back for all eternity."

I don't really think he believed that. I wouldn't have. Mab had made a name for herself among the old Celtic gods for treachery and double dealing. Which is probably why she did as well as she appeared to do in Hell. Got to hand it to her, the bitch was very good at what she did, and truly hated Lillith, the Lillim, and Home. Mostly because she wasn't able to suborn the first and second, or rule the last.

"I will keep that in mind, Lady," Baal gave her a cryptic smile. "It will be good to know you are at my back." (freely translated: Good, at least I'll know where you are and what mischief you're up to.)

"Why do you put up with all these idiot Humans in your Citidel, my Lord?" The former goddess questioned as she chanced to glance out a large open space in the wall that might have been a window if it had contained glass, or even a metal lattice screen, to see a large group of those beings drilling in the courtyard below. "I would have them on the plain outside my own place of power, was it me hosting the treacherous vermin."

"Well it isn't you," Baal returned shortly, then shrugged. "They are valuable at the moment, as infiltrators, assassins, saboteurs, and agents provacateur. Those idiot Humans my dear Lady will lay the groundwork for our victory in the Human Realms. Many of them will rule there soon enough, and are foolish enough to trade eternity for material promises in life. They do and will serve a purpose, and are primed to strike in concert with our own moves against Lillith and Lucifer. With Hell and the Human Realms in our hands, Heaven will dare not make a move against us. Until it is too late for them to save themselves. In a very short time, Lady Mab, I will make you Queen of all creation, and you shall rule at my side for all time."

"A most pleasant prospect, my Lord Baal," Mab gave him a wolfish grin as she fingered, then took another of the grisly snacks. I had the distinct feeling that She intended to rule alone, but under the circumstances thought it wise not to warn Baal. The Lady reclined on one of the couches with a sigh of momentary contentment while chewing the screaming morsel, then finished it before continuing. "To Rule in Heaven, Hell, and the Human Realms. Such a bold ambition. That's why I like you Lord Baal. You don't fear to think and plan great things. Or to execute them."

"An ambition, my Lady," Baal nodded in agreement, (Hey, the guy was a god once, and ruled in another version of Heaven -- I think. So his attitude was easy enough to understand. Just hard to stomach was all.) "that is quite easily within our grasp, and will begin to fruit like a choice apple tree just waiting for us to pick what we will very soon.

"That is good," Mab purred in a velvety, frigid voice. (don't ask how velvet and frigid go together, just take my word for it -- with Mab concerned they did. "What about this snap inspection Lord Lucifer has sent to investigate Gehenna? Do you think He suspects anything?"

"Such things are routine, milady, Lucifer always suspects something." Baal replied with a small grin. "Any intact evidence has been destroyed by now, and those fool Hell Maids won't be able to see anything but my own forces at a well honed state of readiness. Their report will show Gehenna ready to continue The War if that should come, and nothing else."

"I still dislike the timing of this inspection." Mab countered while carefully selecting her next snack with the delicacy of a young girl choosing a chocolate. "It comes at a time that could be very inconvenient for our plans. I think you might arrange a training accident to catch them up in. Then send profuse apologies to Lord Lucifer while our forces are readying themselves to strike at His heart."

"Anticipated and taken care of, Lady Mab," Baal chuckled. "Those arrogant bitches won't survive to pass tales to anyone. I can promise you that. While my heartfelt apology to Lord Lucifer has already been drafted in the event that they should stumble across anything the least bit incriminating."

"I am still uneasy at the timing of their advent," Mab pressed. "You are certain no Lillim accompanied them? Even shielded from view?"

"None passed the entry gates with them, Lady, I assure you," Baal soothed. "Given the propensity of that kind for magics, more than one very subtle trap has been set to capture and neutralize any Lillim foolish enough to venture into Gehanna just now."

"Lucifer has authorized some new type of Demon," Mab answered slowly, with a barely contained rage at the thought. "One of those kept some of my oldest and most trusted Hags from obtaining a very special soul at The Gates recently. By using magic despite appearing to be a simple Hell Maid, my Lord. This one destroyed one of my favorites so completely that recovery will never be possible."

"I know," Baal answered with a wry grin before turning directly towards me. "Welcome to my Citidel, Little One. I fear you are going to regret the visit very soon."

One thing I've heard is that there is one major drawback to having the complete attention of a Demon Prince. Which is-- Having the complete attention of a Demon Prince. And I had two of them paying very close attention to me at that stage in the proceedings.

Oh shit.

My masking spells fell apart as if they had never existed and I felt the beginnings of some very powerful binding spells picking thier way into the deepest reaches of my being as Mab started, then glared at me, then began to smile. (When Mab smiles it isn't a good thing, in case you aren't up on your Celtic mythology.) I was caught, and could find no way to run. All I could do was hope the information that I'd already passed along would be enough, and that Syl and my other sisters would get out of this debacle.

The magical power exerted on me was not only overwhelming, it was a blanket that prevented any use of magic on my part. Running physically was more or less out of the question, too. There was a very massive steel door that had been locked so thoroughly that not even the most proficient lock pick or locksmith could crack it, between me and any slight chance of freedom. Then there was the mob of Myrmidons and Hags outside that door. I wouldn't last five seconds in either case, and knew it with a certainty that bordered on a par with knowing God himself was opposed to Hell.

Those binding spells hadn't locked into place, fortunately, when I spasmodically released my ace in the hole, while drawing the TOW from my pack. I hoped it was loaded, but under the circumstances think I can be forgiven for forgetting whether it was ready to go or not. It was just the first thing that came to hand and I was kind of desperate at the time.

My, oh my! Faint booms, tremors in the chamber we occupied, more booms that were less faint...

Need I go on? Oh, let's not forget the creaking and snapping of overstressed metal in with all that.

Binding spells, Protections, magical blocks, traps, and a lot of other nasty things fell into a confusion of disarray and let it not be said that this little lady didn't sieze the opportunity when it offered itself.

The tower room we were in starting taking on a very distinct list as I pointed the Tow in the genreral direction of Baal, and a furious Mab, then fired it . The thing was loaded. It didn't really damage that pair, but did distract them long enough for yours truly to port out of the place with all those very ugly binding spells still looking for someone to tie up happily left behind.

A spared glance showed me that getting out of Gehenna and avoiding further visits in the future was probably a very good idea. The Citidel was busily collapsing in on itself with a gratifying accompaniment of screams, more explosions, and creaks of collapsing metal. Did I mention that some of the charges I had set were thermite? Silly me. Steel can and does burn under the correct circumstances. Count carefully placed thermite charges going off as one of those instances.

 

* * * *

 

Needless to say, I didn't hang around to watch the chaos I had caused. Centering on the trace of Syl I had, I immediately ported to where she and the group of Hell Maids were currently giving grief to a harried and very angry Myrmidon in company with a seething group of Night Fiends.

"Hey everybody!" I shouted while giving the Night Fiends something besides casting webs, spells or fighting to worry about. "Time to beat feet. Let's get out of here!"

One look at my smoke stained apearance and the emptied TOW launcher still in my hands was enough for Syl and the others. They all immediately pulled weapons from their very own personal arsenals and began firing at random. I never did see what kind of facility or emplacement they were inspecting at the time. Burning Night Fiends, One gutted Myrmidon (courtesy of an overly exhuberant Syl) and innumerable explosions, shots, richochets, and clangs of bladed weapons hitting armor kind of distracted me. Of course, the burning Night Fiends were my fault. And they were pissed off over it.

"Everyone gather round me!" I shouted over the uproar. "Now!"

Most of the Hell Maids had already done that, smart enough to understand that even with the ordance they all carried and were using with such gleeful abandon, I was still their heavy artillery. Syl grabbed a preoccupied sister from the smoldering clutches of several worse for wear Night Fiends as I began the spell that would get us back to Home without letting outsiders tag along.

The portal opened up with gratifying speed, and all of us dove through it like all the fiends of Hell were on our tails. Come to think of it, they might have been by then. We all passed the crackling defensive lattice that covered the interior of the Portal without harm, but for the one and only time in my existence, I actually felt sorry for the Night Fiends who tried following. They gated to somewhere else, too, only their destination was one of the more noxious sulphur pits in Hell. With even more physical and psychic damage than they had already sustained.

Somehow, I didn't think I'd be a willing visitor in Gehenna anytime soon.

 

* * * *

 

We landed right in the middle of Lillith's admin area with varied clangs, crashes, and thuds of bodies hitting others and the incidental piece of furniture. Syl and several others immediatley booked, to find the portal leading to The Barracks, and Lord Lucifer's Demense to spread the warning of imminent attack to those precincts. I found myself sitting on the lap of a rather dumbfounded clerk who had been typing some kind of report, who managed to splutter out an indignant. "What's the idea?"

"Can it," I answered, reaching over her still immobile form to toggle the Pan Home and Allies Alarm switch that I knew was situated right at that particular desk and that one only. And here you thought I'd missed my target when setting up the portal from Gehenna, didn't you? "We Have bigger problems than a messed up office just now. Where's The Lady at?"

"Right here, daughter," Lillith emerged from her admittedly plush office to survey the shambles her outer office had become in such a short time. "I trust there is a good explanation for this spectacular entrance into my offices?"

"Baal and Mab are plotting to take over Hell, with Home as one of their major targets." my answer came out with what I thought was commendable calm and succinctness. So what if was shouting? "And I'm pretty well sure that Lord Baal and Lady Mab are launching the attack right now. Provided they've gotten out from under the rubble of The Citidel. If they haven't managed to dig themselves out yet they will soon, and man are they pissed off!"

"What did you do?" Lillith questioned while sending out more alarms, with her own seal attached.

"Dig themselves out?"

"Well, I kind of blew up The Citidel," my answer came but it sounded a bit lame even to me. "No, make that, I'm sure, really sure that I ruined Lord Baal's home and that I don't think I should go anywhere near Gehenna for at least a few thousand years."

"Oh," Lillith nodded with a quizzical look for me. "I think this story is going to be worth the time to hear. But later. For now, get to one of the borders and get ready for the trouble you've uncovered."

"Yes, Mother!" I immediately charged out of the broken up office, even remembering to let go of the still befuddled clerk at the door, to the gate leading to the part of Home I called home. Then followed by the remaining Hell Maids in the group, dove through it to literally land at the feet of a very surprised, but loaded for bear Lorilei.

The little darling managed to pull her spell back before it blasted us, then favored me with a frowning look. "All right, Angie, would you mind telling me what you've done this time?"

"Made one very bad enemy, and reinforced the enmity of another one," I replied as I hurriedly donned my armor, Hell's Defense and began rooting around in my pack for something that would hurt demons at a distance. "Tell you later, Lor, for now just get ready for a really nasty reaction to whatI did, okay?"

"ONLY BLOWN LORD BAAL'S CITIDEL INTO SO MUCH SCRAP METAL," Mama's voice entered the conversation. "WITH HIM AND THE LADY MAB IN IT."

"Really?" Lor seemed impressed, a first since we had met.

"What SHE said," I responded, peering into the distance for any sign of attack or anything else that was amiss. "And let's just say that those two are more than just a bit annoyed with me."

I still don't know what Lorilei's reply to that was, because about then the proverbial excrement impacted the equally proverbial device built to move air. And spread the shit very liberally around.

 

* * * *

 

The first little hint that anything might be wrong... (Hah! That happened even before I went to ugly uptown Gehenna.) Okay, let me rephrase that one. The first sign that we were really under attack was really pretty innocuous. Every Acacia tree near us started shaking and waving as if in a high wind, but there wasn't even a breeze at the time.

"Uh, oh," looking up and around, I tried to sense anything hostile nearby. (Nice thought, but in Hell, just about everything can be hostile at one time or another.) "I have a really bad feeling about this. Do these trees shake like that often?"

"No," Lor surveyed our surroundings uneasily. "Surely Baal and Mab couldn't have launched their attack already?"

"Don't kid yourself, sis," I answered, starting to remove weapons from my backpack. "They had everything just about ready to move on us as it was, and my blowing the plot wide open probably caused them to jump the timetable up."

A nonplussed Victoria stroked the handle of her axe in a manner that was almost sexually obscene as she observed my unpacking. "How do you do that?"

"I'll explain later, kiddo," still rummaging through the pack I came up with what I had been hunting with a triumphantly satisfied, "Ah! I knew I'd packed this thing!"

"Ok, so what is it?" Lor questioned as I held out the compact little cylinder for examination.

"A hand held, reusable SAM launcher," Victoria supplied with a halfway amused look as I unfolded the weapon and carefully loaded it. "Does the enemy fly?"

"Nope, but they have things that do, pretty nasty things. Trust me, I've seen them up close and uncomfortable." lining up the sights, I peered through the rangefinder, selected the Fire and forget option to go with the smart missile I'd loaded, then handed it to Vicki. "Here, kid, when the shit starts really flying, just point this at anything in the air that looks like it wants to eat you, and shoot."

Vicki looked as she was going to argue, then shut her mouth as a tremor ran through the ground under us. "Got any more missiles for it?"

"ALARM! ALARM!" MAMA's voice roared in our minds. "HOME IS UNDER ATTACK AND THE PERIMETER HAS BEEN BREACHED!"

"I knew it," grinning with a humor I really didn't feel, I pulled a small crate out of my backpack and handed it to Victoria. "Here you go. Got twenty of the little beauties in there. Don't waste them."

"Mother!"

I winced at that, being a female was still something kind of new to me. Being called mother, by another newly made female was just not something I was prepared to deal with then. Come to think of it, it still isn't, but I suppose I'll get used to it one of these centuries. At that moment, there were more pressing matters holding my attention.

"Heads up all, incoming!" Syl, how had she gotten back so fast? I wondered, shouted in warning as a blue tinted sphere arced towards us from a distant wavering line on the horizon.

"Damn!" I watched the wavering line resolve into a mass of fast moving Night Fiends and other even less savory creatures. They flopped, flapped, staggered, bounced, leaped, or just plain ran. Lor took care of the nasty looking sphere by simply firing off a Hell bolt into its center. The resulting explosion and shower of ice shards nearly knocked us off our feet.

My own spells were pretty well depleted, and I really hadn't had time to recharge since my return. I had enough in reserve for a real emergency, but looking at the rapidly advancing horde, I got the sinking feeling that this wasn't one of those. Yet.

Hell's Defense growled, Heaven's Bane hummed a happy little tune, and I knew we were in deep trouble there. And gathered enough of my madly scrambling wits to shout out, "Distance Weapons, NOW!"

Either everyone had listened to me and acted very quickly, or most of us were thinking along the same lines. As I grabbed up a nasty little rapid fire grenade launcher, I heard a variety of thumps, foompfs, booms, zzzztts, cracks, and bangs from the people around me.

"You gonna use that thing, or just admire it?" Syl questioned acidly while I fumbled with the barely familiar mechanism. Hell Maids do have an affinity for weapons, it happens to be our reason for existence, but come on now. I wasn't a full Hell Maid, and had been a minion of Hell for a very short time in spite of all the trouble I'd managed to get into so far.

"How's it work?"

"Point that end," Syl helpfully tapped the blunt muzzle, then the trigger mechanism in the middle of the thing, "squeeze that, and brace yourself!"

I did. Hoo boy! The rapid series of thumps from my weapon of desperate choice knocked me clear back to the rear of our group and landed me on my butt too.

An exasperated Syl helped me to stand by the simple expedient of grabbing my arm, yanking, and setting me on my feet. "I said to brace!"

"Yehaaah!" whoosh! Boom! Click, snap, click, click, snap. Whoosh! Boom! Victoria was joyfully finding nasty looking flying things, then picking them off with the SAM launcher. "Allll Riiight!"

Well, she had been the one who shot Lor when Lor was a Human male. Groaning, I loaded another rack of grenades into my own little monster, and fired away again. At least that time I didn't land on my butt. I flipped over and used my head instead. Literally.

Half dazed, and seeing real stars again, (painfully familiar after my training sessions with Syl) I felt a hand take the grenade launcher from me and replace it with something both lighter and smaller. "Here, try this, little sister."

Brekke grinned down at me as I examined what she had handed me. An AK47 with a bunch of banana clips to go with it, as she hefted the grenade launcher. "Less kick, and you don't have the body mass for this damned thing."

"I'd just figured that out," was my grated response, but I did manage a weak grin in return. "Thanks."

"Have fun, little sister," the Hell Maid clapped me on the back and nearly sent me sprawling on my face again before moving off to make use of her newly acquired ordnance.

Well, between the weaponry, spells, and whatever else we could throw at them in the few minutes before the enemy closed, we had managed to blow some pretty respectable holes in thier advancing ranks. I'd emptied all my banana clips, scooped up some more from a Hell Maid who would never use them again, or anything else for that matter, and emptied those. Then I was faced with a choice. I could either use the light, rapid fire weapon for a club, or resort to drawing Heaven's Bane. Go ahead, you guess which option I took.

Evidently both sides had expended their ammunition, at least near us. The clatter of weapons hitting the ground accompanied by the soft hiss of blades, axes, and maces being pulled out hinted that we were sure out of the point and go boom stuff. Happily, it became clear that the bad guys were too. But Sweet Nineteen Million Names of Hell, there were still a lot of them.

I looked around to see how many of us were left, and felt even more discouraged. Syl, Brekke,

Lorilei, Victioria, a pair of badly singed Lillim, and me. That was it, out of almost fifty of us to begin with. The Hell Maid with the Howitzer, whose name I had forgotten, to my shame, had been the one who provided me with the extra clips for the AK47.

"MOVE BACK!" MAMA's voice warned us. "RIGHT NOW!"

We didn't need to be told twice. All of us hightailed it in the clearest direction away from the advance of Baal and Mab's forces.

"FAR ENOUGH, GET READY NOW."

We watched in near dumbfounded amazement as the land itself folded over at least half the enemy troops headed our way. Then started rubbing the folded sections together with the nasties in between.

It was an awful lot like watcing an apparently solid board turn into a cloth napkin, fold itself in two, then begin to industriously rub the outside parts of the folded napkin as if trying to squash a particularly noisome insect you didn't want to touch, but sure wanted dead.

And the damned fools kept coming anyway. Some of those were grabbed by suddenly animated acacia trees, shrubs, and even some of the longer grass. Seeing a damned tree lean over to first snatch a Night Fiend with unnaturally limber branches, then use those tentacle-like, unnervingly prehensile branches to pull the thing into a lot of little pieces before reaching for another victim was really something. I made a quick mental note to never, ever get MAMA really angry with me.

Lawn-like grass had suddenly grown to nearly seven foot lengths or even longer and developed very serpentine characteristics. I watched in mute amazement as several blades(?) snaked around the legs of a Myrmidon then proceeded to drag him into the ground. Literally. The grass simply pulled the Demonic champion down like a ravenous sea monster dragging a sweet morsel underwater to eat it at leisure there. We weren't getting nailed by as many distance weapons or spells as we might have been simply because the invaders had to make use of them to fight off the suddenly active, and hostile flora.

But gods, there were still a lot of them advancing on us with intent to commit major mayhem on our bodies. Flying boulders, nasty tempered trees, and hungry grass notwithstanding, all of us watching in total awe as MAMA went into FULL DEFENSE MODE knew we would still be outnumbered, hard pressed, and very, very busy within a few minutes.

At least all the lesser nasties and beasties were gone. Now we faced Night Fiends, Hags, and a few units of Myrmidons. Lucky us. I idly noted that the Acacias around us had started to flex their own branches, while the grass everywhere but the spot we occupied was growing and becoming thicker, growing armor-like scales, and waving in anticipation of getting their own share of fertilizer very soon.

"Now what?" Vicki glanced from one of us to the other while stroking the handleof her axe again and sparing the odd, nervous glance for the suddenly active plants around us..

"Well," Lor grimly answered. "There isn't any place to run. MAMA has told me that Home is pretty well overrun all around except for the center. I say that's where we head, pick up whatever stragglers we can, then make our stand."

"Like we have a choice," nodding my agreement, I staved off a potential explosion of temper from the little Succubus with a wave and grin. "I sure don't have a better plan. Anyone?"

No answer.

"So I would suggest that we get theHell out of here right now!" Lor finished, then pointed back to where our first battle had happened. The land was seething with gleefully dancing Night Fiends, grimly smug Hags, and stolid Myrmidons. All headed our way. At least the ones not fighting either the landscape or flora were. Which was still an awful lot of bad guys for our diminished group to face head on.

"Sounds good to me," I hastily agreed.

"Just a second," Vicki held our headlong retreat up briefly while muttering something that sounded obscene even in Hell, then made several throwing gestures with both hands. The crackling waves of energy that came from her to snake and circle among the celebrating enemy was a fairly simple spell, but almost terrifying in its pure power. What do I mean almost? It was, and remember, I'd been hanging out with the precocious Lorilei for most of my time in Hell.

As crisped Night Fiends, Hags, and some very badly scorched Myrmidons fell writhing to the ground, Lor and I exchanged quick glances, then shrugs, then grinned like maniacs. "That's our baby!"

We shouted in unison.

"Okay," Vicki brushed soot from her hands then gave us all a pointed look. "We can run now."

We did.

 

* * * *

 

"MAMA channeled some of her power through me," Vicki was explaining as we rushed headlong away from the still overwhelming numbers of the enemy. "SHE told me everyone else who could do it was so exhausted, the overload might kill them."

"I'm starting to think that would have only been a bit earlier than otherwise," I panted in response.

"But we'll leave this existence in glorious style!" Syl grinned nastily. "And be taking a whole shitload of Baal and Mab's finest along for the ride."

"Well, this looks like the spot." Brekke waved our ragged group to halt on the top of a deceptively gentle appearing rise and turned to critically survey the landscape we had just crossed. Remember, I had mentioned panting? Well, MAMA had altered the terrain of Home from the verdant parkland into a convoluted series of dead end ravines, steep rises, sudden drops and choked the whole thing with thick, prehinsile looking vines just for spice. It had been hard work getting up to where we were, let me tell you.

"Good as any I've seen so far," I admitted grateful for the respite.

"Won't be much better inwards," Vicki noted with a look at the still park-like stretch of ground only one very steep gully behind us.

"You and the other little ones recharged yet?" Syl questioned Lorilei while looking at the troop of about forty Lillim we had picked up on the way.

"As well as can be expected," Lor returned, giving the other thirty battered Hell Maids who had joined us a long look of both respect and a little doubt. "Can you and yours still fight effectively?"

"So long as we stand, we can fight, Lady," one of the Hell Maids avowed with a wicked grin while brandishing a nicked sword. "and We're always effective in a brawl."

"What about you two?" the little Succubus looked at me and Vicki.

"Ready to go, little sister, I answered.

"Got enough left to show those things some tricks they might not have seen yet." Vicki grinned.

I fenced, and was a black belt third degree in Tai - kwando when I was Human."

Sheesh, we'd spawned a crazy female ninja or something, I thought to myself while watching her demonstrate some very nasty little moves to all of us.

"I still like your foot in their heads move, myself," Syl grinned down at me. "Nothing fancy, just good old fashioned beat 'em till they drop style."

"Kind of messy, though," I pointed out half seriously. And getting my foot out of their damned heads is real bitch."

"But it sure shakes up the opposition, little sister," the Hell maid responded with a throaty laugh.

"Not to mention me," I grumbled. "I have to get airborne to use the stunt at all."

"Here they come!" One of the Hell Maids announced rather matter of factly I thought for someone looking their own end of existence down the throat. I inanely wondered what happened to Demons when they died. Was there another version of Hell waiting for us?

We just natrually fell into a formation most effective for the conditions. The Hell Maids, me, and Vicki moved to the front while the Lillim, fearsome hand to hand fighters in their own right, fell to the rear so they could cast what spells they had with a minimum of hindrance. Then we put up with each others sick jokes while we waited.

MAMA had been pretty accomodating to us in choices of ground. To get any farther along with the invasion, our enemies had to negotiate a single valley leading to the simple looking rise that we stood at the end of. That would funnel their numbers into a fairly confined space, making it difficult for them to bring their superior numbers to bear in an overwhelming attack. But it also meant that we would be facing a very steady battering from enemy after enemy. And they had to take the rise we had chosen or the invasion would stop then and there. At least from this direction.

Well, in a battle or even everyday existence, one takes the little favors granted and makes the best of them. But a few thousand fresh troops for reinforcements on our side would have been nice. Like I said, 'ya pays yer money and takes yer chances,' Especially in Hell.

 

* * * *

 

It was pretty grim group waiting at the top of that rise. Our home had been invaded, we had all lost friends, and it looked as if the sheer numbers of attackers would overwhelm us and break into the as of yet undespoiled center of Home itself. MAMA in full defense mode was something to see, the land istelf convulsing to swallow the enemy, plants of every kind grabbing to choke and tear them limb from limb, and the lay of the land at least favoring us wherever we went. But it looked to all of us, that no matter how awe inspiring it was, or destructive to the enemy forces, would be enough to tip the balance any more towards us.

We were tired, dirty, many of us were injured in varying degrees of seriousness, and every one of us standing atop that rise was madder than (You Guessed it) Hell aroused from a sound sleep, and were determined to exact the highest price we could on the invaders for their passage over us. Because they sure weren't going to get around, or past us while we could stand up and use either weapons or spells.

The Night Fiends swarmed up the slope with a liquid grace that was frightening to see, and impressive.

Even MAMA's interference barely slowed them down. The Hags hung back, obviously preparing spells just as our Lillim were doing behind us, and the Myrmidons stolidly marched up the slope without visible concern as their numbers thinned from the attacking Flora. No wonder those guys were Baal's Elite.

They were tough, disciplined, and determined to carry out their Prince's commands or die.

Well, there was a bunch of very pissed off Hell Maids, Lillim, and pair of Valkryies waiting with the intention of letting them do that. Die in the atttempt, I mean. Strange how clear your thinking can get at times like that, isn't it? I remember very calmly watching all that, noting different things about each of the three groups of our opposition, and looking for weaknesses that I could exploit. Vicki stood beside me,obviously doing the same thing during that all too brief period of quiet.

"Hell Maids to the front," Syl commanded quietly, then added, "You Valks stay behind our line and pick off any that get through us and be ready to fill gaps in the rank. This is going to be a fight like we haven't had since the War cooled down. Should be interesting."

"I always wondered how one of those damned, prissy Myrmidons would stand up against a Hell Maid." Brekke put in with a grin while hefting her massive Two Handed sword in one hand (quite easily, I might add) and shifting a nastily spiked shield into a more comfortable position on the arm not holding the sword.

"Wannabe Ninjas first," another responded with a chuckle. "Let's make really sure to show those spider/weapons geeks how real warriors fight."

"Yep, sister," another responded with a nasty, anticipatory grin. "But I don't plan on letting any of these survive and carry the tale to others."

"Ware their webs, all," Syl advised,then grinnned back at Vistoria and me. "And you two watch out for any jumping over us. They like doing that kind of thing, so I really doubt that you'll be at all bored in the coming fracas."

"Oh, we have a few surprises for any who try that," I assured the Hell Maids as a group, then found myself grinning too. "Vicki and I can still zap as well as slice and dice, hack and slash, or whatever.

I'm really looking forward to frying a few more of the suckers, or sending them to where their sisters ended up when they tried following us home earlier."

"But I don't know that many spells," Vicki protested.

"Just throw a chain lightning behind them, hon," I advised in my turn. "That should give them something to think about besides overrunning us."

"hmmm," the thoughtful expression on her pretty face boded ill things in the immediate future for our enemies. "Yeah, and a few Hell Bolts, with some living fire, and...."

"You've got the idea," I answered, then cautioned. "But don't forget that you have a weapon fully capable of giving more than Angels grief."

"Mother!"

"Kids," I shrugged with a small laugh. "They grow up so fast these days, don't they?"

"Your mom knows what she's talking about," Syl grinned back at Victroria, and winked at my obvious discomfiture at being called a mom. "You should have seen her in action at old Shen-Dai's stronghold.

She was truly... Ah, surprising with all she did there."

"You forgot to mention the scared shitless part, and the fact that half the bad guys I got were complete accidents." I grumbled.

"But such fortuitous accidents they were, Angie!" My former trainer grinned. "Awe inspiring, the damage you managed to do by accident."

"Much as I hate to interrupt this very interesting conversation," Vicki interrupted, pointing to the slope in front of us. "We need to continue it later. Our company's here."

"Oh, good," Syl turned to face the slope, now swarming with Night Fiends closely followed by a large cadre of Hags covered by the thinned, but still impressive ranks of Myrmidons. "I was beginning to think they'd decided not to come and play."

They hadn't decided to quit yet.

Gods of creation, destruction, and other fun things, they not only showed up, but hit us like a mass of down-sized, ugly tornados.

 

* * * *

 

All the noise is the first thing that comes to mind when I recall that fight. Clangs of weapons against armor, shield, or other weapons. Shrieks of the attacking Night Fiends, warbling battle cries of the Hell Maids, shouted commands and warnings, assorted booms, fizzles, pops, crackles, and zings as spells flew, blended right in to the aural chaos without a hitch.

A couple of the Lillim kept the Night Fiend's webs at bay, while Vicki and I cheerfully fried, electrocuted, or freeze dried any who tried leaping over the triple line of Hell Maids boisterously holding the top of the slope. I actually think those ladies were having fun. But to be fair, Hell Maids were created to fight, and are Lucifer's Elite fighting force.

Things got really confused for a while with all the spells, and short individual clashes going on. What am

I saying, for a while? I used up my last spell on an eight limbed idiot who thought the Lillim behind us would be easy targets, but neglected to consider the two Valkryies between it and the intended victims.

After that, I let Heaven's Bane loose, and Vicki had started using Angel's Grief long before I ran dry in the spell department.

The ranks of Hell Maids had thinned, but was still holding, mostly. I moved forward to fill a gap in the line, and found myself facing three of the spider freaks at once. Each of them was brandishing, and using four weapons at the same time. No shields, though. Too bad. For them.

With my usual, and by now famous battlefield aplomb, I shouted a strangled "Gaack!" and started swinging Heaven's Bane at anything that wasn't me in a desperate attempt to get the suckers away from me. To my usual (and very unwarranted according to Syl) surprise I cut all three of them into variously sized parts suitable for frying before one could so much as bring a weapon to bear on me.

While I was doing that, Hell's Defense literally crisped another that decided it would be a good time to tackle me from the side. (Sometimes having armor with a mind of its own is a pretty good thing.) After that the general confusion degenerated into pure chaos. A Myrmidon decided I was a weak link in the defensive chain and I avoided his whistling attack with a sword bigger than I was through the simple expedient of going airborne. Then typically, got clumsy and landed on his head with both High heeled hooves.

"I hate that!" Kicking myself free of his ruined head before the body could pull me down as it fell, I angled over to give some help to a Hell Maid who had gotten herself isolated from the rest and was hard pressed by so many Night Fiends that the Myrmidons trying to exploit her vulnerability couldn't get close enough to use their weapons. I gave them someone to play with. After considerably thinning the ranks of the nasty uglies (Night Fiends) with a surprise attack from above that left half of their number with either broken heads, or in lots of little tiny, bloody pieces.

"Oh, hello," I greeted the Myrmidons with a viciously arcing downward swing of Heaven's Bane that took one's head off and literally disarmed another. (His severed arm flopped around, as if seeking its owner before getting trampled in the rush of other Myrmidons anxious to commit mayhem on my person.

"I don't think we've met."

"Lord Baal wants this one alive," One of them wearing the rank insignae of a Captain cautioned the others. "don't kill her."

"Oh, I'm flattered that He wants to see me again," with a sweet smile, I cut the captain into two separate pieces -- lengthwise. "But I'm really not interested in seeing Him any time soon. Sorry, guys."

"Hell with that," another wearing sergeant's stripes grumbled. "Kill the bitch and tell whoever asks that the Spider Freaks did it."

I screamed in pain as a dastardly attack from behind broke my right wing, and made sure that the culprit would never sneak up on a lady again. But my ability to fly was gone. Which made the situation even worse than it had been. So I did the one thing that no one, not even I, expected. Instead of trying to get away, I charged right into the midst of them with Heaven's Bane moving so fast she looked like a silvery streak in the air. I don't know whether it was pain, desperation, rage, or a combination of all three (that last one gets my vote, but I'm still not sure.) but within several very rapid minutes I was alone in a circle of dismembered Myrmidons and rivers of blood. And was looking for someone else to hurt. Not to mention bleeding from numerous wounds of my own.

Things had gone very quiet as I stood panting inside that circle of bodies and body parts. With a quick look around (and a pang of disappointment that I never thought I would feel when a fight was over) to see the enemy withdrawing in reasonably good order, provided you allow for the speed of the withdrawal.

(Ok, they were running like whipped puppies yelping all the way home to mama.)

The pain of my injuries, especially the damaged wing took that moment to let me know it was there, and

I'd damned well better do something about it quickly. My bright response to that was simply to groan,

"Oh, shit, that hurts."

"Angie," a tired voice interrupted my cataloging of injuries and rating how much each one hurt on a very abritary scale that went from 'ouch' all the way up to 'Arrgh!'. "Get yourself back behind us and let Lor take a look at that wing. It looks bad."

"Gee, think so?" I looked up at a battered and bleeding Syl and gave her a crooked grin. "You oughtta have a look at it from in here. Broken, I know that much. The other damage to it, I haven't worked up the nerve to check."

"Morning star, I think," my friend judiciously looked the damage over and tried not to wince. "It's broken all right, and pretty shredded in spots, too."

"I wish you hadn't told me that," with a bright smile, I promptly fell to my knees, then hit the ground with my face. Then mumbled through the turf, "Ruined my whole day."

"Good fight you gave them, little sister," Syl answered, gingerly picking me up and carrying me back to the others. I moaned something totally unappreciative of her efforts as the tip of my damaged wing (and my broken tail, I found out later) brushed the ground. "Lord Lucifer is going to be pleased with Lady Lillith's newest daughters, I think."

"How's Victoria?"

"In better shape than you are," Syl answered with a chuckle. "But not much. You two seem to have a knack for finding the nastiest parts of the fight and jumping right into the middle of them."

"Gotta be the wings. Remind me about that later," was my muttered response. "When I can actually kick myself for it without hurting things any more than they already are."

"No problem, little sister."

"I'm sure it won't be," I grumped from within the fuzzy maze my mind had become all of a sudden.

"You'll take great pleasure in reminding us both, I have no doubt."

"Got that one right, Angie," Syl laughed through her tears. "I'll never let you live it down."

"Damn right you won't,"

"Just stay with us so I can, ok?"

"Sure, love to, but think I'm going to take a nap right now."

"Good idea, Just so long as it's only a nap." Syl answered in a choked voice. "We've lost enough good ones today. If you leave us, I'd be tempted to go after Lord Baal and that bitch Mab myself."

"Feel sorry for them already."

 

* * * *

 

"She'll be ok now," Lorilei's voice penetrated whatever dreams I'd been fighting my way through.

"But she won't be flying for the next little while."

"Lor?" I questioned.

"Welcome back Angelique," her grin was very suspiciously strained by relief she wasn't trying to show as I forced my eyelids to peel themselves away from each other so my eyes could see if they still worked. "Are you in any pain now?"

"Only a little," I lied, as the bolts of fiery agony lanced from my damaged wing and tail to my already overtaxed pain centers.

"Sure, I really believe that, you idiot," She answered with a tired little grin. "Why in all the Names of Hell did you jump right into the middle of them like that?"

"I dunno, just seemed like the thing to do at the time,"

"Well remind me to never, ever, make you mad enough to come after me like that, ok?"

"Sure will," I mumbled, getting to my feet and finally looking around. The surrounding area looked like a hastily set up triage unit in an overworked field hospital that hadn't had time to even set up tents.

There were injured Hell Maids, Lillim, and a very battered looking Victoria within several feet of me.

"Gods! How manyof us are left?"

"Not all that many," Lorilei answered quietly. "We beat the literal Hell out of them, but they returned the favor."

"Why did they stop?" I questioned in genuine curiosity. "We were in bad shape, they could have probably overwhelmed us completely with one more push."

"I think they got tired of climbing over bodies to reach us," Syl offered with a crooked grin. "We had a pretty impressive rampart built up from their dead."

"They needed to regroup and recover," Brekke, appearing as much the worse for wear as the rest of us, put in. "We Hurt them bad. Real bad. Lost heart and just turned around and ran after you took out the Myrmidon Captain and his troop."

"Well," a distant, and weary voice added. "They've gotten their collective shit back together. Here they come again."

"Oh joy," I grumbled, making making sure Heaven's Bane hadn't gotten lost in all the confusion. She hadn't, and was ready to go at them again despite several rather large nicks in her gleaming blade. "Guess we'd better get ready for them, then."

With something less than pure enthusiasm, all of us, even me with my broken wing (okay, it was healed up, but the poor thing was too weak to support me in the air and still hurt like blazes -- and don't tell me that I was imagining that unless you would like some broken bones of your own so we can compare notes a bit more realistically, all right?

"Same formation as before, my friends," Syl passed along as we straggled up to the position. "Leave the bodies alone for now, they'll give us a rampart of sorts and we need all the help we can get. Been nice knowing all of you, but I think it's time to die. Let's just make damned sure those assholes know they were in a bloody big fight here when it's over."

"No need for that, Ladies," a deep male voice interrupted. I turned to see who that could possibly be, a male on Home's Turf without suffering grief for it? What I saw literally had me gasping in lustful amazement.

The owner of the voice was a tall, darkly handsome fellow in blood red armor and carrying an almost bewildering array of weapons on his broad back. Not only that, he had brought friends with him. A lot of friends.

Among the friends he had brought were both Dimona and Helga. The imp ran up to Lorilei with a gleeful, if manic, expression on her cute little face. "Hey, Boss, I found us some help!"

The Death Angel (Angel!? In Hell, without having to fight his way every step?) I had briefly seen during the near fiasco in the rogue Shen-Dai's ruined palace, and the halfbreed Succubus/Angel I had helped out of trouble at the one usable door into the place were there. Adrianna, I remembered her being named.

"Jedidiah!" Lor greeted the Death Angel with more than a little surprise. "What are you doing here? You haven't Fallen have you?"

"No more than I had the first time you met me," the Death Angel shrugged. "But I still Owe you, and am more allied with you than with Heaven any more. Besides, whether Heaven knows it or not, it's in their interest to see this rebellion put down. We aren't ready to resume The War yet either."

"Okay, I won't argue that point," the little Lillim grinned. "Who's your friend? You know, the good looking, sexy one in the red armor?"

"You can call me Arie," the gentleman in question smoothly responded before Jed could reply.

Otherwise known as Ares, Mars, and by several other names I won't bother to mention just now."

Urk! The Greek god of War. Right in front of me, and I was such a mess! Worse, he turned to greet me, and even took my hand in a gentle grip, then leaned forward to kiss its palm. I had an orgasm on the spot.

"Lady, I saw some of what you did here and am greatly impressed with your fighting abilities." and I swear he winked and grinned at me! "If you weren't already taken by a certain smith who favors me with his work off and on, I fear that I'd try recruiting you into my own cadre."

"You'd have to fight Lillith, and me, to get her," a beautiful, very feminine voice that sounded vaguely familiar interrupted with a chuckle. "Not to mention a certain very horny and capable of fighting himself, Dwarven smith."

"It's been a while, Inanna," Ares turned to give the regal woman who had spoken a low, respectful bow. "As always, it is a pleasure to see you."

"As it is to see you again, Ares," Inanna answered with a smile that would have melted the entire north pole if aimed in that direction. "But you can't have my children. Especially not the Valkyries. I worked very hard to get them, along with Lillith. Neither one of us would stand idly by while you tried stealing either one of them away from us."

Inanna...Queen of Heaven... once. Holy shit, I finally recognized her voice. "MAMA!"

"Yes, dearest child, that is what you and many others have called me since I claimed refuge in the underworld." the goddess replied with a soft smile for me.

"We seem to have work to do here and now," Lillith moved to join the group with a nasty little grin of her own. "Baal himself, with Mab tagging along, are marshalling their troops down the slope even now. We can all reminisce and get acquainted after this business is finished. And Mab is Mine."

The tone of Lillith's voice caused me to shudder even though the rancor in it was aimed at someone else.

"She's all yours, Lillith, dear," Inanna answered, then hardened her own voice. "As I have business to continue with Baal, especially now, I'll be far too busy to worry about that upstart little bitch."

"Hmm," Ares grinned at the pair. "Remind me to leave your children alone. I wouldn't want either one of you after my balls, or any other part of my anatomy for that matter. I'll honor your wishes and concentrate on breaking the assault. Have fun Ladies."

"What happened to get Him involved in all this?" I questioned, giving the departing God of War a longing, and curious look.

"He hates Baal, and chafes at the idea of subordinating himself to Hell's war leader," Lillith answered with a small chuckle. "And takes every opportunity to vex Baal he can find. This is one of those, and He does actually like me and Inanna. So he is doubly motivated here."

"Oh, ok."

"You all rest here and watch the show," Inanna -- MAMA -- told us. "I guarantee it will be worth watching. And my very personal thanks to all of you for holding them until we could settle other matters and reach you with reinforcements."

With that, the goddess, and the being who was maybe even older than she was (Lillith, dummy, haven't you ever read the bible?) very regally stalked off to join the mounting counter-attack on Baal and Mab's forces.

 

* * * *

 

It was really something to see, let me tell you. Lillith, with her group of (reasonably) fresh Lillim tore through the Night Fiends and Hags like a little boy gleefully kicking a large, teeming anthill to pieces. Leaving the rest of the Fiends, and Hags to her followers, She simply unexisted a tight group of Hags and Myrmidons (I know how that sounds. But I swear by the unholy grail that's exactly what happened. One moment all those hostile creatures were making threatening noises and preparing to attack her, the next they were gone. Well, except for some dirty piles of ashes with scorched, and/or melted armor and weapons mixed in.) then confronted a frothing at the mouth, enraged, Mab one on one.

"You arrogant, foolish little bitch," Mother Lillith's voice carried up to where we waited and watched from over a hundred yards away. "What made you even think that Home, let alone myself and all who live here, would tolerate your filthy presence, or even consider allowing you to rule here?"

"Thrice damned and twice spurned, bitch!" Mab screamed back. "Your prissy dominance in the councils of Hell ends here. Now!"

It got sort of hard to see what was going on after that. With all the spells, innate magical energies, not to mention clawing, biting, and hair pulling (hey, it was a catfight after all -- just one so monumental that attempting to even describe the bits I managed to see kind of go pale in comparison to the real thing.) and the ocassional use of a weapon, it wasn't safe to be anywhere near those two at the time. In fact, I was considering the wisdom of moving back from the near ringside vantage I had.

Oh, yes, Ares and his fighters, including Jedidiah the Death Angel were energetically dismantling the major Myrmidon formations while that was going on. And doing so quite well, I should add. Baal himself sighted the figure in blood red armor leading the reinforcements that were devastating his invasion force and roared in pure, unadulterated rage. "Upstart Godling! Are you enough of a fool to think you are a match for Me?"

"I'd be more than willing to find out, you overbearing thug!" The other War god in the conversation cheerfully shouted back without halting in his joyous dismemberment of several Senior Myrmidons at the same time. (He wasn't even breathing hard, while doing it, either.) "But someone else wants to speak with you right now!"

Inanna suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Literally. Being the basic force that created and holds Home together has its perks, I could see. The goddess, one time Queen of Heaven, favored Baal, her contemporary with a chilly smile. "Hello, Baal, we have a few matters that require finishing between us, I believe."

"I bested you once, Inanna," Baal answered with a ferocious baring of teeth that could have been a grin. "Wasn't that enough for you? You've not seen fit to seek me out in all the time we have dwelt in the underworld, and I would have made you a Queen!"

"I was a Queen," Inanna answered quite equably, but the undertones in her voice were not at all pleasant. "Until you betrayed me to Yawveh and his upstarts. I turned your proposal down before that and see no reason to accept it now. Share a throne with you? I held one quite well alone before your premature withdrawal from the field allowed the Hosts to swarm into the gap you left in our defenses. I can well see how That One and his gratitude has served you since, but He has little use for cowardly turncoats either."

Suddenly, She was armed and clad in glowing armor with a simple diadem across the top of her business-like helm. Oh, yes, I did mention armed there, didn't I? Her weapon sort of looked like a staff tipped with absolutely vicious looking blades at either end. The staff, or whatever it was, rippled in my view, changed shape, size, even apparent materials it was made up of. Whatever form it took was extremely nasty to face, and I thought it was made up more of energy than solid matter. (I was right, but still haven't figured out the trick of shaping one for myself. Gods are able to do such neat things, aren't they?)

That was another of those fights that one catches bits and pieces of while being very glad your own participation other than as a distant spectator wasn't required. Those two could fight, and obviously held very ancient grudges that I was just as happy not to be involved in other than peripherally. Trust me, when gods face off, little folks like you and me get out of the way and do our best to stay there until the disagreement is over.

It seemed that others thought the same thing. Namely, Night Fiends, Hags, and the few surviving Myrmidons. Their retreat (all right, it was a rout, pure and simple) was harried by very pissed off Lillim, Enraged Hell Maids, and the troops Ares had brought into the battle. Even so, there were still a freaking lot of them. Some of the idiots even ran in our direction.

Oh, well, at least we'd managed to get a little rest, and had allies hotly giving chase to those charging up the slope towards us. Frankly, I was hoping the pursuers would catch them and save us the trouble of taking the nasties out. Didn't happen.

That was one ugly fight. The bad guys weren't really interested in much more than getting past us, and we weren't about to let that happen. A lot of them, Night Fiends, and Hags, anyway, weren't even carrying weapons any longer. We killed them anyway. And kept killing until our arms ached and our legs had gone rubbery. Once they realized they were caught between two forces determined to destroy them, most actually did pick up discarded weapons and try giving us a fight. I still detest Hags, and hold only a slightly better opinion of Night Fiends, But in the end, even decimated (in the literal Romanesque sense of the word) and then some, demoralized, and without a snowball's chance in Hell (another misconception there. Some parts of Hell are so frigid they'd make the arctic seem tropical.) They still wouldn't surrender. Even when we fianlly gave them the chance.

Baal was down and not moving, though He wasn't dead. Mab was still on her feet, kind of, being firmly held by several Hell Maids and the Celtic goddess had a very battered, shredded look that hinted she wouldn't be on her feet without being held up.

Ares was standing in the middle of a pile of bodies even more impressive than the one in front of us, calmly cleaning his weapons and thoughtfully scanning the battlefield. A ragged cheer started, then swelled as other victorious survivors joined in, until it echoed like thunder in a closed room.

The rebellion was quite effectively finished, and a failure. But the ramifications would reverberate through Hell for a very long time to come.

 

* * * *

 

Jedidiah, along with Adrianna, left almost as soon as the fighting was over. They hung around only long enough to make sure things were well in hand, and for the half breed beauty to find me. She stood in front of where I had found a reasonably comfortable piece of turf to collapse on and simply stared while shaking her head in bemused humor. "You know, Angelique, I don't think I've ever seen you without bruises, cuts, and other wounds. Up close and quiet, though, I do think you'd clean up really nice."

"Thanks," I mumbled, just loudly enough to be heard. "I think. And thanks for showing up here."

"Well, Lillith is my mother," she responded with a shrug. "If I hadn't already gotten back into her good graces, thanks in part to you, this would have been the chance I'd been waiting for. But you're welcome. We really should try and get together sometime when we aren't preoccupied with just survivng the moment, don't you think?"

"Anytime, my friend," I answered with a real grin of my own. I actually liked this one. A lot.

"As for me," the Death Angel put in, "I haven't been properly introduced, but have heard a lot about you, and seen you in action. I am Jedidiah, and am pleased to make your acquaintance, Lady Angelique."

"I'm no lady," I grumped shifting a little to find a more comfortable position for my still tender wing and tail. "But the plearsure is returned, Jedidiah. By the way, aren't you violating some kind of rule by being here right now?"

"Too many to count," he shrugged without concern. "Old Dominic will have a real heyday with me if he ever finds out about my participation in this fracas, but so what? Dominic and his lackeys were why I was barred from Heaven in the first place. At least if that happens now, I do have somewhere to go, right?"

"I'll bet Lord Lucifer would be more than happy to have you," I replied with visions of real red carpets, and other blandishments offered to the Death Angel if he was even considering a change of venue and loyalties.

"Something to keep in mind," Jedidiah nodded, knowing what I was thinking. (Sometimes Angels, even half-fallen ones, can be so damned unnerving with the way they seem able to discern anything you think about, even if that one was pretty transparent. Hey now, don't be snickering at me over that, I had been through a pretty rough go recently, you know.) "But for now, I intend to keep my options open, if it's all the same to you, dear lady."

"Guess I can't blame you for that," I agreed, then shrugged. "But I would sure hate to line up for a fight and see you on the other side."

"The feeling is mutual, Angelique," Jedidiah responded tiredly. "But it might happen. Until then, though, and even if it should happen, you have my undying gratitude and friendship for helping Adrianna when no one else would even give her the time of day."

I replied with what was becoming one of my stock phrases then. "Just seemed like the thing to do at the time."

"Well, time to go," Adrianna leaned forward to plant a sisterly kiss on my cheek, "You get well, then come visit sometime soon. I need to speak with Mother for a few minutes then we're gone. It's best that Jed not spend any more time in Hell than absolutely neccesary right now, after all.

"I can understand that," rising to give her a hug, then one to Jed, I waved in the last direction I had seen Lillith. "I think she's over that way, making sure Mab doesn't get away before the Tribunal convenes."

"Yup," Jedidiah answered after peering in the indicated direction. "There she is. Inanna seems to have Lord Baal pretty well under wraps, too. I'll look forward to seeing you again, Angelique."

"You both take care of each other and yourselves."

"No problem there, Lady," Jedidiah answered with a wide smile and hug for Adrianna. "I wish you well in the future, which is no small thing since I'm still an Angel."

"Thanks, but Angelic blessings aren't exactly something I'd know how to handle just now."

"Don't worry about it, Angie," Adrianna advised. "Just take the luck that comes your way and run with it. That's what I do and it seems to work without fouling the lines of essence and spirituality too much."

"I'll keep that in mind," I shouted to their retreating backs while wondering just exactly what I could possibly do with more luck.

 

* * * *

 

A familiar, booming voice attracted my attention as that pair left. "Ah, Lass, what a fight you gave those dastards! I was soo proud of my little hellion I nearly forgot to fight myself. Would have missed a great party if I had!"

"Nice to see you, too, Giruidir," I answered with a slow grin as the heat in my belly went from its normal smoulder to a small flame.

"Aye, that was a beauty of a fight you went through," the dwarf, who still had co-habitiation rights in perpuity with me (not that I was too upset over that, just wondering when the randy old character would tire out.) ambled up with a broad grin splitting his beard. "But you need schooling in the proper care and feeding of magical weapons and armor, my dear."

Giving a rueful glance to Heaven's Bane's nicked blade, and the multitude of small rents in Hell's Defense, I returned an insouciant grin to his comment. "But that's why I have you around, darling. To help me fix the little nicks and scratches from normal wear and tear on them. Isn't that right?"

He almost melted then and there. Gee, being a gorgeous female does have its benefits, doesn't it?

 

* * * *

 

The Tribunal was short and rather brutal, even by the standards of Hell and considering the crisis we had just gone through. Infernal Affairs was reamed for missing the clues that the rebellion was going to occur at the time it did, and let me tell you, that bunch was taken as much by surprise as everyone else. Not that they hadn't suspected, and sent the requisite reports to Lord Lucifer, they just hadn't expected little ol' me to foul Baal and Mab's timetable so badly that they would launch the attacks before the nasty pair were quite ready.

The sitting Magistrates were both impressive and more than a bit intimidating. Lord Lucifer, Lady Inanna, Lord Chronos, Mother Lillith, and several lesser lights who just wanted to be in on the fun.

I testified regarding the meeting I had accidentally (?) eavesdropped on and so drastically interrupted, but that was all there was to it. I told my story, what I had seen, heard, and other information I had gleaned from my very interesting (and last for a long, long time to come) visit to Gehenna. No cross examination was offered, no protests at my testimony were voiced, but I felt the glares from Both Lord Baal and Lady Mab throughout the ordeal. (Giving a testimony at a Hellish Tribunal is kind of like having your mind sifted through, shaken, turned upside down, inside out, then shaken again. There is absolutely no way anyone at all could lie their way through all of that. Especially with such powerful Lords sitting in judgement and doing the sifting. I still get a headache when I recall that experience.)

You've already seen my comments on having the complete attention of a Lord of Hell having only one major drawback, which is having the complete attention of a Lord of Hell. Multiply that by the thirteen sitting members of the Tribunal and you can see why I was uncomfortable.

"LORD BAAL," Lucifer commanded once all the evidence had been given. "STAND AND RECEIVE THIS TRIBUNAL'S JUDGEMENT."

That one complied, with all his usual arrogance and pride, along with a good leavening of defiance, though I detected a trace of nervousness in His demeanor along with all that bravado as Lucifer intoned forcefully. "YOU HAVE BEEN FOUND GUILTY OF SEDITION AND ATTEMPTING TO OVERTHROW THE EXISTING RULING ORDER OF HELL. GIVEN YOUR PRESENT POSITION, AND THE CONTRIBUTIONS YOU HAVE MADE IN THE PAST TOWARDS THE ASCENDENCY OF HELL IN THE WAR AGAINST HEAVEN, YOU WILL NOT LOSE YOUR POSITION."

I, and others were slightly outraged, but not surprised. Baal began to puff himself up even more than he had been but Lucifer hadn't finished his pronouncement. "AS A RESULT OF YOUR UNFORTUNATE ATTEMPT TO UNSEAT THE CURRENT RULERS OF HELL AND SEVERAL OTHER DOMINIONS WITHIN HELL, YOU SHALL BE FORBIDDEN TO SHAPE ANY MORE WARRIORS, NIGHT FIENDS, OR RECRUIT OTHERS TO YOUR SERVICE FOR A PERIOD NO LESS THAN FIFTY YEARS AS MEASURED IN THE HUMAN REALMS, AND TO BE NO MORE THAN ONE HUNDRED FIFTY OF THOSE SAME YEARS. YOU SHALL ALSO SUBMIT ALL PLANNING TO THE LORD ARES FOR ASSESSMENT AND FORWARDING TO ME. ALSO YOU WILL EXPERIENCE ONE YEAR OF PAIN FOR EACH OF THE DEMONS WHO DIED AS A RESULT OF YOUR LATEST ESCAPADE. FURTHER, I FORBID YOU TO REBUILD YOUR CITIDEL UNTIL THE TIME OF YOUR PUNISHMENT IS FINISHED. YOU SHALL DWELL IN RUIN, AS YOU PLANNED FOR OTHERS HERE, AND IN THE FOULEST LEAVINGS ANY PASSING BY SHOULD CHOSE TO DEPOSIT THERE. YOU MAY LEAVE US NOW, LORD BAAL, AND REMEMBER THIS. I WILL NOT BE SO MERCIFUL IF THERE IS A NEXT TIME."

With a wave of his hand, Lucifer sent Baal back to his still ruined citidel. At least I hoped it was still ruined. (I know, I'm kind of vindictive, but hey! Where do I live? Vindictiveness just seems to come with the general package when someone here has wronged or hurt you.)

"RISE AND FACE THE TRIBUNAL LADY MAB." Mab was nowhere near so arrogant or defiant as Baal had been. She didn't cringe, but was more subdued than her partner in revolution. "YOU HAVE ALSO BEEN FOUND GUILTY OF THE CHARGES LISTED AGAINST THE LORD BAAL. AGAIN, YOUR PREVIOUS SERVICE, AND THE POTENTIAL FOR FUTURE SERVICE LIGHTENS THE POSSIBLE PENALTIES. YOU ALSO WILL EXPERIENCE THE PAIN SET UPON LORD BAAL, FOR THE SAME LENGTH OF TIME. YOUR RECRUITING OF NEW HAGS WILL BE LIMITED TO THE SOULS YOUR EXISTING HAGS ARE ABLE TO SUBORN AND WILL NOT BE ALLOWED AT THE GATES. IN ADDITION, YOUR ASPECT OF BEAUTY IS TO BE DENIED TO YOU UNTIL THE STATED SENTENCE IS FINISHED. BE ONE WITH YOUR HAGS, LADY MAB, BUT WITHOUT THE OPTION OF EVEN AN ILLUSION OF BEAUTY TO COVER YOUR HIDEOUS FORM. GO NOW, AND CONSIDER ALL THAT HAS BEEN SAID HERE, ALSO OF WHAT YOU MIGHT DO TO MEND THINGS AND SHORTEN YOUR SENTENCE."

That was pretty much it. Oh, except for Lucifer personally handing out rewards for those of us who had fought in the defense of the incumbent order. All of us were listed as Heros of Hell, with far reaching rights and privileges that included elimination of the need to bow and scrape in the presence of one of the Lords of Hell. I was confirmed as the head of a new clan in Hell -- Valkyries, and given pretty much carte blanche to recruit members however I saw fit. Oh yes, I was also named as a special investigator empowered by Lucifer himself (basically at liberty) to go snoop into anything I pleased so long as it involved Hell or Hell's concerns. Which made me think I would end up with even more nasty little missions in the future, but trust me, you do not turn down appointments handed out personally by Lord Lucifer. Not and stay healthy, anyway. (I have mentioned sulfur pit duty haven't I?)

Lorilei was confirmed as a sub-head of clan Lillim, Helga and Dimona each got perks among their own kind (Hell Hounds and Imps respectively) and Sylvanna was named as the new Matriarch of Hell Maids to replace the former holder of that title who had fallen during the rebellion.

Jedidiah, in absentia for obvious reasons, was named officially as an ally (provisional) of Hell with full entry and exit rights. (That was an obvious ploy to recruit the Death Angel into our own ranks on a permanent basis, but who was there to protest? I sure wasn't going to.

Adrianna was granted full rights as a bona-fide Lilim, with severe punishments for any who failed to observe them. So, no more life as an outcast for my newfound friend.

That ordeal was finally over, and all of us retired to our respective homes in Hell. Home had repaired itself after the depredations (from both sides) caused during the battle for possession of that place. With a sigh of relief, I settled to the once again softly inviting turf for a well deserved, and long overdue, nap.

"Lisa is where?! And as what?!" I heard Victoria screech in the distance. "His name is Richard??!

I want to see him. Right now! I still have some things to say to that deceitful, no good, two timing...

Oh, believe it, I'm not finished with that realtionship yet, and I will Let her -- him, know it in very precise and intimately described detail!"

Sheesh, it seemed that death do us part had no meaning to my newly formed daughter. Given her demonstrated homicidal tendencies, and the ability to make such effective use of them, I found myself thinking that dear Richard, incubus or not, was in for an interesting millenia or two. Maybe along with any unfortunate mortal females he favored (or cursed) with his particular attentions. Having a homicidal Hell's Valkryie following him everywhere with intent to commit mayhem was not a position I envied at all.

I made a mental note to try and keep Vicki from outright killing Richard (again) then settled back into my nap with an absolutely ludicrous image of Victoria declaring her love for poor Richard while she tried to choke the life out of him. Or shoot, cut, slice, blow up... Well, I think you get the picture.

.

Ahh, forget it. Interesting is a very good word ( I guess ) to describe life in Hell. Wouldn't you agree?

END

 

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© 2002 by Maggie Finson. All Rights Reserved. These documents (including, without limitation, all articles, text, images, logos, compilation design) may printed for personal use only. No portion of these documents may be stored electronically, distributed electronically, or otherwise made available without express written consent of the copyright holder.