From Jonathan to Rebecca

by Jessica Marie

 

Rebecca's Ordeal

Mother smiled over at me innocently, "I love your earrings Rebecca, I had a pair just like that as a little girl" . "UGH", just the thought of what stared back at me from the rearview mirror disgusted me, my hair swinging from under the lemon yellow bows that held my pigtails in place. I never felt so completely helpless in all my life. My body was surrounded in girlish finery, and I felt nauseous thinking my mother was going to drag me into a store and have me try on dresses. "Now dear, if anyone says how pretty you are, I want you to courtesy like a good girl, and tell them ,'Thank you for telling me I am pretty but, I am a bad boy, and am being punished. ', so everyone knows that you did a very naughty thing today." . I nearly fainted. Not only was I going to the store as a girl, but now everyone is going to know that I am NOT one. My head was spinning and I felt dizzy. Things couldn't get worse. The car pulled into the mall parking lot where customers were milling about going to their cars with bags and packages. "Lets go sweetie pie", my tormentor urged. When I sat stock still she came around and opened the car door, jerking me out by my arm. "If you keep up this act of tough guy I will keep you in dresses so long you won't remember wearing pants. Just wait 'till your Father hears about your act today". My heart sank to my knees. My Father was going to kill me. ME his SON, dressed like some prissy girl at a tea party. My world, as I know it, died and swallowed me up, depositing me in this girlish hell.

I sobbed silently as I walked closer to the portal of doom, my patent leather Mary Jane shoes clacking on the pavement. As mall doors parted with a faint hiss, I clutched my mothers hand tightly, afraid of everyone that bustled about me. Very few people took notice of me, and the ones that did simply smiled at the cute little girl, a fact that took away much of my fears. I relaxed a little more, knowing that nobody has seen through the disguise. Mother took me into the first store on the right of the promenade, Claire's, which seemed to ooze femininity into the surrounding area. Mother took me inside, and selected a few things, several pairs of earrings, a few barrettes, and a little purse with Hello Kittie on the side. Mother brought me to the counter and paid. The teenage girl behind the counter paid little mind, scanning the items and bagging them, with a generally bored expression. We left the store and mother handed me the purse with the new items inside. "Now put it over your shoulder like a big boy." Time stopped for a brief second, once my breath returned to my lungs, I glanced about to see who was laughing. Still nobody noticed a thing, but Mother made it very clear she meant to embarrass me.

After we had browsed from store to store, we began to collect a good selection a bags, which Mother helped me to carry. I now had enough dresses, skirts, and blouses to wear something different every day for several weeks, which didn't raise my spirits. Fortunately the feeling of the breeze on my legs and up my skirt was were more familiar now, and much less foreign. "One more store to go princess, then we can go home." , Mother said calmly. We walked into Nordstrom's and selected several dresses and had me try them on. 5 more dresses were added to my selection. Mother brought me up to the counter to pay. The elderly lady behind the counter smiled at me, "What a lovely little girl you have there Ma'am". Mother squeezed my hand "What do you say?" . I blushed heavily, "Thank you" . Mother squeezed harder. "Is that it honey?". I blushed so hard, I thought I was going to bleed out my pores. " Thank you for telling me I am pretty but, I am a bad boy, and am being punished" I muttered, barely audible. "Louder hun, the nice lady can't hear you.", I repeated the phrase confidently, hoping that I would sound convincing and my mother would quit squeezing my hand. The ladies smile faded a bit, and said, "Well dear you look lovely. I'm sure you must be embarrassed, but be a good boy next time", she winked. Mother winked back and took me out to the car.

I collapsed in a pile of ruffles in the seat, while mother put the bags in the trunk. From the amount of clothes she bought, things looked to be permanent for me. My only defense would be to play like I enjoyed being a girl, then hopefully the fun would wear off and I could be myself again. I had never in my life experienced such humiliation, pushing, prodding, spinning for mother to see how the dresses and things looked on me. The enormity of the day weighed heavily on my shoulders. "The worst part was still to come" I mused to myself, knowing I still had to face my drunk of a father. Mother started up the car and we headed for home. I sat in awkward silence, pondering the terrors to come. One thing was for sure dad would not like the change. He would probably beat on me for allowing this to happen, and beat on mom for encouraging it and wasting his booze money on girl clothes for his sissy son. I could see it all in my head like it was projected in front of me on a screen. When I looked up I saw my friends playing football in the next door neighbors yard. I sighed audibly knowing what was coming next, and my mother took notice. "Don't worry dear, if they start anything I will call their mother's and they will have the same fate as you". For once my mom was on my side. I stepped almost fearlessly from the car, my petticoats swishing. "Hey Jonathan is that you! What a goddamn sissy!". My mother rushed to my defense. "You watch your language Michael! I am going to call your mother, and you will be sorry young man!". I smiled up at my mother for the first time that day. I went into the house and plumped down in front of the tube. "Take the bags upstairs to your room and get washed up, you are going to help me in the kitchen." Knowing arguing was pointless, I obeyed.

After doing as I was bidden, I joined my mother in the kitchen. She tied a flouncing lacey apron around me, and gave me a bag of potatoes and a peeler. "Peel those, put them in this bowl and wash them." I spent the next 30 minutes actually enjoying myself helping mother, a thought that scared me on reflection. I jumped at the sound of the door slamming. "Hey bitch did you get me that bottle of Jack Daniels like I told you last night?" Mother rolled her eyes dramatically. "Yes dear, it's on the table". I heard a grunt of acknowledgement and footsteps come into the kitchen. I kept my face turned away, concentrating on the potatoes. "Who is she?", my dad asked. "Its Jonathan, who else" my mother said as if it were a common thing for me to be dressed this way. After an unbelieving pause of recognition, my dad's laughter filled the room. "HAHAHA, oh my GOD, HAHAHA! Jonathan you little puss. And here I was thinking you were gonna BE somebody! HAHAHAHAHA…!" I cried openly in shame and ran to my room, slamming my door behind me. I cried until I had no tears left, leaving two oval shaped wet spots on my pillow. I heard the door open and close softly, and felt the reassuring hug of my mother pulling me close to her. I cried anew on her shoulder. "Your father isn't going to laugh anymore. I told him it was a punishment and that you fought it. He promises to accept you like this until the punishment is over. Lets get you cleaned up for dinner." I followed mother into the bathroom quietly sniffing, knowing that with her on my side everything is going to be ok…

 

To be continued…

  

  

  

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