From Here, Where?               by: Anne O’Nonymous

 

It was a very nice Spring day when the walk started, and I felt really good! The birds were chirping, the flowers were in bloom! All was right with the world! Then, it happened! I was walking past a Grocery, when I felt a pain in my chest! "Gas pains," I thought. They soon got worse, and then my heart went into overdrive! I was having a heart attack, a massive one! Clutching at my chest, I fell to the ground and soon some spectators gathered around!

"Are you okay?" "Do you need help?" "Will somebody call for an ambulance!" "Is he going to be alright?"

I heard all these and more as I lay there, dying! I felt so tired, so very tired! I just closed my eyes, wanting it to be over with! I just can’t believe it, I’m dying on such a beautiful day!

It was a strange feeling: one minute, I’m on the ground, the next I’m here above looking down! I see a body there, and I recognize it! Me! All those people around, now an ambulance arrives--I feel like shouting, "I’m here!" and I wonder if it would be heard. I see them taking "it" away, and I’m drawn away with it! Is there a chance I could be resuscitated and just resume a normal life? Normal life? My life, normal? Just wait till they undress me--I can’t wait until they find those Mint green panties on me! I wish I could be there to see their faces!

Now, I am feeling drawn to something--I can’t describe the feeling. It’s like a giant magnet is pulling on me! I’m going upward, towards a brilliant white light! You know those lights at a ballpark, well, just like those, only hundreds of times brighter! It’s not a harsh glaring light, but diffused. I am drawn to it, and I enter, moving much faster now. I see my past flowing by, like a river of memories, good and bad! The end is near, now I see "IT."

How to describe "it"--Well, imagine the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen! This is what I saw! Indescribable loveliness personified!

She flowed towards me, and I heard something in my head.

"You are welcomed. I am here for you," I heard and felt the warmth of her greeting!

I could see the earth below, receding at a rapid pace! We were moving upward, out towards the stars.

I was afraid to ask the question, but I felt I must: "Where are we going!"

"I am taking you ‘home’ to rest!"

"Home?" Was I going to Heaven? I asked, but did not need to, as an answer formed in my head--"Do you want it to be?"

"Well, I thought I would be going to the other place."

"Why is that?"

"I’ve been a crossdresser all my life, and the Bible says its wrong!"

"Do you know who I am?"

"An Angel!"

"No, I’m God!"

"But, you are a woman! God is a male!"

"Your people believe that! Take a look around you! At the vastness of the universe."

He looked around at the stars, planets, galaxies and felt oh so small, so very insignificant!

"Is this male or female? Are the stars female? Are there male planets and female comets?"

"No."

"Is love male? Is kindness female?"

"No."

"Then why should I be any different?"

"Then I’m not going to Hell?"

"Would you believe that a god of love would create a place of such torment?"

"No."

"You created it in your writings, and you create it on earth. You with your wars, petty disagreements, and need to be in charge. Oh, I don’t mean you personally, just mankind in general! Look around you at the beauty of the thousands of worlds out here!"

He looked at the universe, now all around him!

"But isn’t what I do a sin?"

"Do you really harm anyone? Do you do what you do to create anger in another? Is it a sin to feel good about yourself? The real sin is to do harm to others and yourself in any manner. Joy is not a sin, neither is giving pleasure to others. Why do you think I made two sexes? It would have been just as easy to create one!"

"You are an extremely beautiful woman. Is this what you are, or are you something else?"

"I am what I am. Nothing more, nothing less! I am to you what you want me to be!"

"Then, to others you would be..."

"I am what I am!"

"I don’t understand!"

"In a Holy Book on earth, there is a passage, ‘I am the Alpha and the Omega’-- do you understand what it means?"

"I think so. Alpha and Omega are letters in the Greek alphabet, the first and the last. So, I would guess it means that you would be the first and last, like the beginning and end of all things."

"And what about all the time between? What happens there! Think on this: Alpha and Omega are the first and the last letters, the beginning and ending. All the letters included."

"I think I understand: You are all inclusive, all things! Am I right?"

"Right! I am the baby crying for its mother, I am the homeless man you pass on the street, I am the sea, the air you breathe, the land, the water you drink, the night sky, all things. You have heard, ‘God is everywhere,’ and all things."

"Then I am you and you are me," I replied.

"Right again. I cannot leave you and you are always a part of me!"

"Are, eh, is this you or..."

"Some worship me as ‘Goddess,’ and see this manifestation. Since I am all, I have no need for a sex, as I am all sexes. This is the way I would appeal best to you, after all this is what you wanted to be!"

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Brinng, brinng, brinng.

A very insistent alarm went off. Rev. Paul Carter woke from a very sound sleep!

"Good Morning, Dear! Did you sleep well?" asked his wife.

Paul stretched, and replied, "Relatively well, considering I am doing a sermon and eulogy at Tom’s funeral today!"

"That’s right, he had a fatal heart attack yesterday, didn’t he," she said.

"Yes, downtown! He was a great guy!" Paul said in reply. "The sermon came to me in my dream. I think I’ll speak on the nature of God!"

"Do you have it written down, or are you just going to say it as it comes?"

"I’ll just speak from my heart," Paul replied. "Can I borrow your black dress, slip and stockings. I want to look my best at the funeral, all the other girls will be there!"

 

 

Finis--That’s all folks, Anne O

 

© 2001
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