A Frilly White Dress for John

by Joanna Maguire

 

This is a true story. Nor a work of the imagination or fictitious It may not seem real. But it is true it does however leave out or only hint at the pain and anguish of a boy who was petticoated first by his mother. The confused and depressed life of a cross dresser who finally reaches a compromised solution by being pet coated by his wife .Of course the full story is much more complex than this short story.

 

I remember when I was a young boy, when walking with my mother, ladies in the street would remark" He has such nice curly hair. It is a pity he is not a girl" This happened many times.

In my first year at high school there was a science teacher, Mr Potts who was a hard teacher that used the cane on his pupils, who misbehaved quite regularly. I was and still am a quiet withdrawn, meek and mild person. One day I was lost in my thoughts. Mr Potts asked me a question that I did not hear. I was called out in front of the class to get six cuts of the cane, three on each hand. I held my right hand out, waiting for my punishment. Swish, Swish! Swish! Quickly I had received three painful cuts. My hand felt like it was on fire This was something that never had happened to me in front of the class. I was told to put my left hand out for the final three cuts. I could not stand any more pain or humiliation. I ran towards the classroom door. I ran down the stairs, headed out of the school grounds running until I was out of sight of the school. At school in the 1950's both boys and girls still received corporal punishment at school if they did something considered misbehavior by the teacher. It is against the law 45 years later I usually traveled to and frow to school by bus. I did not want to be seen waiting in my school uniform at the bus stop, so I decided to walk the five miles to my home. I stopped at a milk bar to by my lunch an hour and a half later I arrived home to find my mother waiting the school had phoned her, the headmaster had told her about what happened at school. " You are not a very brave boy, a bit of a wimp I think. Your father is not going to be pleased when he comes home. It's the strap for you, then bed without dinner. Go to your bedroom and think about your fate" I lay on my bed for the remainder of the day.

At six O'clock I heard my father arrive home from work. I listened through the door as my mother told my father of the events at school. The door opened, my parents came into the room. " I hear you have been a bit of a coward at school? Then you ran away from class" He unbuckled his leather belt, pulled it off through the belt loops on his pants.

This will hurt far more on your bare behind than the cane. Its twelve lashes for you my lad" Take off you pants" My mother ordered. I did as I was told. I started to protest. My mother told me to lay face down on my bed. I did so nervously. "You wont run away from this time" Father said as he sat on my abdomen. His weight pinned me to the bed. I could not wriggle out from under his weight. I turned my head to see my mother raise my father's belt above her head. Then the sting of it wrapping itself about my bare back side

I screamed and yelled, "Stop it" loudly only to feel the pain of the next blow on my behind. I kicked and screamed as each of the remaining ten welts bit into my bare flesh.

It was all over in a minute or so. But it seemed to take forever for the hiding to end. My bottom was on fire my father released me. I could see the red welts on my in the mirror on the wardrobe door. I lay down on the bed crying for at least an hour as the pain and heat on my bottom subsided. It was eventually replaced there by the pangs of hunger

In my stomach took over. Eventualy I fell asleep. It was early when I awoke in the morning, just after sunrise. My mother was already in the kitchen. Father had already left for work my bowl of Weet Bix was already waiting on the table. I poured on the milk from the jug then, ate my breakfast greedily. I asked for another bowl of food. Mum filled it again saying " Off to the shower. You're not going to school today. I will show you what happens to sissy boys" As I showered I thought' Its Friday so I will have 3 days off from school Great' I finished the shower, walked back to my bedroom to put on my shorts and T-shirt. Lying on the bed there was a white frilly girls dress. I stared at the dress for a moment. My mother came into the room handed me a pair of girls white lacy panties plus an under petticoat or slip. " Put theses on then the dress sissy boy" I said "No mum I cant put on a girls dress I am a boy" " Don't argue sissy boy or it's the strap again" .My behind was still a bit sore from last night belting so reluctantly I obeyed.

My mother came back with a pair of white stocking plus a pair of black girls shoes.

Mum help me put on the stockings, and then hesitantly I put on the shoes. Mum stepped back, looked at how the dressed fitted. "You look nice as a girl better than a grubby boy" Your curly hair needs a brush" She produced a hairbrush, then brushed out my hair until I looked like the girl in the ginger Megs comic. She then produced a blue ribbon to tie in a bow in my hair. I looked in the mirror, to see a pretty girl in the reflection." Not quite right yet" Mum went out of the room, then came back with a tube of light pink lipstick which she applied to my lips." That's better now you are a real sissy boy. Us girl are going out shopping in town now" I was dumbfounded." You can't do that I will be recognised," I pleaded." Remember the strap sissy boy? I think I will call you Catherine now. You look just like a Catherine. Come" She said as she led me out the door, then up the path to the front gate and into the street. One of the nearby neighbors was passing. She stopped to look." I did not know you had a girl child. She is a pretty little girl. Such lovely hair. Much nicer than your sons locks She commented in passing. What's her name? Mum replied Catherine. Yes she is a pretty little girl" My legs were still shaky. But at least I had not been recognised. We walked towards the tram stop. The cool breeze was making the skirt of my dress balloon upwards." Hold your dress down; put your hands down in front of you Catherine you don't want the boys to see your panties. Its not lady like" I did as told. Walking up the street towards us was two of my schoolmates. I tried to hide behind my mother. They walked passed I felt relieved that I was not recognised until one of the boys looked back and whistled at me as my skirt again blew up revealing my panties." You will have to keep that skirt under control. I don't want you turning into a slut," My mother commanded. I did not know what a slut was. But I knew it was something or someone bad or unladylike. We waited at the tram stop for twenty minutes before a city tram came along. I stood at the tram stop with my eyes down in shame incase I was recognised. We got onto the tram. It was a toast rack tram with a half dozen open doors with long rows of wooden seats that seat about eight people on each side.

I sat nearest the door with my mother next to me. At least I was not sitting next to a stranger. However at the next stop a man got into the tram seating him opposite.

My mother whispered in my ear " Keep your knees together girl. That mans looking up your skirt" I quickly brought my legs together, looking down sheepishly at my feet for the remainder of the journey into the city. We alighted from the tram at the town hall, Walked down the street to Market Street to the department store that in those days was called Farmers. Mum entered the store with me following behind. We took the lift to the first floor ladies wear department. She headed towards the ladies powder room, I followed her meekly. "She whispered in my ear" Don't forget that us girls always sit on the toilet. Girls cannot stand to pee!" I went into the first cubicle lowered my panties, and then sat down to empty my bladder. I waited after I had finished and pulled my panties up under my dress. My mother came to the closed toilet door" Are you finished yet Catherine? You must not take all day!" I opened the door. The room was now full of ladies waiting for a cubicle. "Go wash your hands girl" I moved to the washbasin, washed my hands. Mum was washing hers at the next basin. Then she opened her handbag, put her hand in to get a lipstick tube. She smoothed the lipstick on, and then handed it to me. "Your lips need touching up" Obeying I took the tube of lipstick looked into the mirror to, touch my lips up, Even though I was still nervous I thought the quicker I put the lipstick on the quicker I will be out of 'The ladies room' Once we were out of the loo, I was lead to the handbag section where my mother looked for what seemed an age at the little girls bags before she finally purchased one then handed it to me." Put the strap over your shoulder" Down in the crowded lift we went to the cosmetics department looked at the rows of lipstick. She chose another light pink tube, Payed the sales lady. The handed me the lipstick." Put it into your handbag for latter" I did so reluctantly. Mother and I spent the next hour or two looking at dresses for both herself and her little 'Catherine' Held of dozens dresses up against herself but put them back on the clothes rack. Off to the 'girls department we went. This time she got me to hold a dozen or so in front of me 'her little girl'. She chose two, sent me off to the change room to try them on. Terrified I did as I was told. I took off my white dress in the change cubicle, put a pink dress on then went out side for my mother to view the new dress. "No that's not nice". Try the other one on" I went, changed into the other yellow dress." No that's not you either Go back and put your dress on, Then we will go to Curzons down the road" Leaving Farmers I followed mum to the other department store. This time we went straight to the "Lingerie dept. Mum took me over to look at night dresses. She held several against my body. Selected a blue satin one with lace and ribbons at the top. Again she paid the shop girl, handing me the bag with 'My new night dress inside' we spent another hour looking at underclothes for my mother. She eventually purchased a new corset for herself. While looking through the corset department I was at first bored. However after a while I gradually became fascinated with theses garments.stared at them, eventually I touched them to see how they felt. This fascination was to grow over the years. I still have a fascination with corsets forty years later.

Finally progressed to the 'girls department'

. The holding of dresses against me began again. One more I had to try a few dresses on, and then parade myself for my mothers' approval. Eventually she chose a blue dress, then one with another with little roses and hearts. I was again given the bag holding the new dresses to carry. I thought we were leaving until my mother selected two pairs of panties

To match the new dresses.

"Lets go and have a nice cup of tea." Seeing you have been a good girl I shall let you have a nice cake. At Repins in Market Street .I did indeed have a fairy cake with my tea

As mother discussed her purchases for us both.

"Its nearly five O'clock. Your father will be 'knocking off work soon. We will to pick him up" Again I became terrified at the thought of my dad seeing me in a dress. I had no choice in the matter. We waited outside his place of work, Anthony Hordens another department store where he worked as a chef in the store restaurant. . We waited outside the staff exit for a half an hour. Lots of people started coming out the door at ten past five. My father approached. I tried to hide myself behind my mother again, She pushed me

Forward towards my father. He looked ahead." Look at our new little girl Catherine; Bill "Isn't she pretty? Better than that grubby boy Johnny. It's a pity we did not have a girl. Her hair looks lovely. Catherine is such a nice name don't you think?"

Mother was a very dominant woman, always getting her own way." Yes dear "was all my father could answer. After my father bought the evening paper we took the tram home.

When I arrived home I raced to my bedroom to take the dreaded dress. I looked into the wardrobe for my boys' clothing-It was empty. Mother came in behind me, and then told me in a brusque manner to hang up my new dresses, put my new panties in the drawer. But to leave my nightie on my bed for later.

" It is Friday night so it fish and chips night" We always went out to a café to have the traditional Friday night fish and chips. I remembered that the father of my classmate Emanuel owned the shop. I can't go there like this I protested. My father started to undo his belt. I now knew it would be useless to resist. So we soon left for our meal. It was a long walk to the café. But the night air was cooler so despite my state of attire I enjoyed the stroll. I protested outside the shop." If you're a good girl? I might buy you an ice-cream sundae for desert "My mother commented My parents went into the booth in which they normally sat. I followed hesitantly. The proprietor came to get our order. "Fish and chips for the three of us, two teas and a vanilla milkshake for Catherine" my father ordered

"Don't forget to use your knife and fork," My mother said "Its unlady like for a girl to use her fingers" The food and drinks were soon on the table. I ate the fish and chips slowly using the cutlery. When we were finished I was told I had been a good little girl so I could have my treat. Dad also asked for the teapot to be toped up with hot water. The chocolate sundae arrived. I started to eat the desert. Suddenly my classmate appeared at the table with the refilled teapot. I closed my eyes in fear." Thank you son' my father said. I hesitantly looked up. Emanuel had gone with out even a glance in my direction.

We finished, my father paid for the meal. We walked out of the café then down the hill towards home. We arrived home, My mother told me to undress, hang my dress up in the wardrobe, Put my panties and stockings in the laundry basket then to have a shower, dry myself properly." Don't forget to use the lavender talcum powder before you put your nightie on Mother reminded. I finished my cleansing. Went to my bedroom. Put my new nightdress on, then climbed into bed. I was tired. I felt relaxed in my blue silky smooth rayon nighdresss. Soon I was sound asleep.

I awoke in the morning. I was hungry. I went straight to the kitchen still in my long nightie. It felt cool against my legs. The Weet Bix was waiting on the table. Dad had already gone to work/ I quickly ate my breakfast, drank the glass of orange juice my mother had squeezed. I started to leave the table. When my mother said out loud. "Not so fast young girl. There is the washing up to be done first" I obeyed, wandring over to the kitchen sink slowly to begin washing drying the dishes, cup sand cutlery. I put them into their appropriate places in the kitchen dresser. " Catherine go, have another shower, dry yourself properly, don't forget to talcum under your arms. I want you to put your blue panties and dress on. You will find your clean stockings hanging up in the bathroom. Use my hairdryer to dry your hair as well! Put on your lipstick as well!

I did as I was told. I knew well it would be futile to argue I showered then donned the blue dress. My mother came into the room to brush my hair. This time she tied two blue ribbons in my hair one on each side. "Go, sit at the kitchen table, I will be back soon" I sat at the table. Mum came out from her bedroom holding a small bottle. Put your right hand on the table" I then noticed what she was holding. It was pink nail polish. I did not protest as she painted each of my fingers nails pink. Two coats each." Wait here until they are properly dry. I am going to get dressed myself us girls are going to visit Mrs. Menzies. Mother and I both dressed walked towards Mrs. Menzies house. I knew where it was but had never visited the house before Dr Menzies was one of the directors of Anthony Hardens where my father worked. I was a grand house with many rooms, a huge garden fronting Sydney harbour. My mother had been invited for morning tea .My mother rang the doorbell; Mrs Menzies dressed in what we now call designer clothes

"Come in My dear, I did not know you had such a lovely daughter. I love her curly hair. Its so nice" Whats your name young girl? I answered meekly in a high pitched voice." Catherine ": That's a pretty name too my dear" Tea is just about read, Cooks baked us some of her famous scones" We enter the lounge room of the house. It is grandly furnished with antique furniture. A table is set up with four cups, and saucers a sugar bowl four, small plates and teaspoons. We sit down Mother starts to talk to Mrs. Menzies. A girl in a white frock similar to the one I wore yesterday," This is my daughter Anne. Indicating my mother she introduces Anne to my Mother." This is Mrs. Maguire, looking towards she introduces me to Anne as Catherine. I think surely, Anne will recognise me as a boy in girls clothing. A woman in black wearing a white apron enters bearing a silver tray holding a silver tea pot, a silver milk jug and sugar bowl. Another woman enters with another silver tray holding a dozen scones on a white plate. There are also two bowls holding strawberry Jam and cream. The maids put two trays on the table. bowed a little. Mrs. Menzies Thanks the maids, they leave the room. She then asks "Every one for tea. Without waiting for an answer she pours tea into the four cups on the table." Milk everyone?" We both nod as she pours milk into each cup. Sugar. We each say one teaspoon politely. Scones are handed about We all cut them in half and put Jam and cream on the halves. Mrs. Menzies and my mother talk to each other gossiping. Anne and I each sip our tea and eat our scones. After a while Mrs. Menzies look at us saying Anne, Catherine you must be bored with us old ladies. Why don't you go and enjoy the garden. Anne shows the way out to the garden. Once outside Anne says. "You're a boy? Aren't you? " I say yes in a low voice." My you look pretty in your blue dress" I am glad you are a boy. Mother never lets me play with boys. We become instant friends, walking around the rose garden talking as boy and girl. I remember this day well. I my mothers old photo album .I still years, later have a black and white picture of us 'girls ' each holding dolls in dresses just like ours. The morning goes quickly Mother comes out into the garden. Mrs. Menzies takes the photograph of Anne and myself

" We have to go and pick up your father from work now. We say good-bye to Anne and Mrs. Menzies, and then walk towards the tram stop. The city tram arrives almost instantly. We board the tram, which heads towards the city. My father is equally under my mother's domination. Almost every day she collects him from work. He can't go to the pub for a beer like most of the other employees. I think she also did not want him meeting other women. After picking up my father we catch another tram home. Arriving home I was about to head towards my bedroom. Mother stopped me." You don't get away that easily. You have to do the ironing. I will teach you to how to sew after you finish. All girls must learn how to sew and mend. I spend the remainder of the day Ironing and trying to sew a tear in one of my mothers dresses. Dinnertime finally arrived. This time I am told to set the table before mother brings the plates of roast lamb and roast vegetables and gravy she had cooked while I was attempting to sew. We listen to the radio serials until half past eight. Then I'm sent to shower and toilet, I put my nightie once again and go to bed. Again its soft silky feeling makes me feel good. I relax soon falling into a deep sleep.

Its Sunday morning my father and mother usually sleep in. But today they are up early,

I find mum and dad at the breakfast table. " We are going to Manly for the day. Eat up your breky .The go and put on the dress with the hearts and flowers. Don't worry about your stockings. I have borrowed a pair of strappy sandals for you to wear. Lipstick though.

I will help you with your hair. Next time you will brush and tie the hair ribbon yourself.ribbon.Mum ordered.

We caught the tram to circular Quay to board the Manly Ferry. I always like the adventure of traveling on the ferry, especially when the ferry turned crossed the Sydney

Heads. The ferry tossed and rolled in the sea. Sometimes when the sea was rough it washed onto the outside lower deck. It takes an hour to get to Manly on the ferry.

On arrival we took the traditional stroll down the tree-lined esplanade that fronts onto the sea. "The sea looks wonderful today Mum" commented. Would you like to go for a swim Catherine? I borrowed a swimsuit for you from Mrs. Carson next door. Its her daughters."

Mum and I headed towards the ladies change room. In a closed cubical I took of my dress and sandals, then put on the girls floral bathing suit. As was the fashion in the early fifties It had a little skirt at the bottom. Mum gave me a rubber bathing cap to keep

My hair dry. Mum had put on her old plain blue bathers. We hired a locker to keep our clothes safe. We met dad outside in his swimming trunks. For a half an hour or so we waded in the cool surf letting the waves break over us. It felt wonderful! We then stretched out on our towels for a sun bake until lunchtime. Dad went for a paper parcel of fish and chips. Mum said I had to go and get two bottles of ginger beer and a coca cola for myself.

With a towel over her shoulders little Catherine went all by herself for the first time to buy something from a shop. Confidently now with the money mum handed to me I walked over to the shop to buy the drinks. When I arrived back with the drinks dad was already there with the fish and chips, which we sat on the park benches and ate. I went back on the beach by myself for a final paddle in the water before mum and I went back to have a cold shower to wash the sand off our swimmers, dried ourselves before we re dressed. I was feeling great. We went to have a look in the tourist shops. One sold all sorts of nick knacks. My mother bought me a nice little gold necklace with a heart as an ornament. She put it about my neck it went with the hearts and roses on my dress. I was really feeling confident now. I asked mum if she would also buy me one of those golden bangles all the girls seem to be wearing. Without a word one was purchased to be put about my wrist we had tea and scones in a café .It was late .We headed towards the ferryboat to return us home. It was cooler on the ferry ride home. I stood up front on the bows of the ferry watching the dolphins leap in and out of the water in front of the moving ferry. As the wind blew my skirt up and down I felt I was now really a girl. We took the tram home I was starting to feel the sunburn on the shoulders. A cold meat salad that mum had prepared before leaving home was soon on the plate. I was tired I undressed, had my

Shower. I noticed in the mirror that my upper chest was red with sunburn its edges were in the scooped shaped on my borrowed bathing suit I awoke in the morning. In my nightdress. Ate my breakfast, went back to my room. I found my boys school uniform waiting on the bed. I dressed hurriedly so I could catch the school bus. I was John again. I was about to leave when mum yelled at me " Don't forget to take your nail polish off. There is a bottle of remover in the bathroom cabinet. Make sure its all rubbed off you don't want the boys to see you have pink finger nails" At school no one commented about my running away last week, But a number of boys including myself were kept in class at lunch time. We could eat our packed lunches but not go out into the playground. After school at home my nightdress was again waiting on my bed. The dresses in the wardrobe had however disappeared. "You will continue to wear your night dress instead of pajama's my mother ordered

Next day at school nothing was said until just before lunch time when my class teacher ordered that I stay in the class room to study instead of going into the playground. I could eat my lunch while I read my notebooks. The school week passed normaly. The headmaster at assembly told the school that for minor misbehavior pupils would now suffer lunchtime detention. However any serious misbehavior pupils would still be punished with the cane. Friday of that week was the end of term.so there would be a three-week break from school.

On arrival at home at 4pm Mum told me to take a shower. Returning to my bedroom with a towel around my waist. I found to my horror the white frilly dress laid out on the bed. I complained to my mother. But I did not resist for long. After I donned my dress, panties necklace, put on the lipstick etc. My mum came into the room." We are going to collect your father from his work Catherine"" You are going to have a lovely time over the school holidays dear"

I was to spend the whole of the school holidays as Catherine. For the first few days I was felt sacred and humiliated, Gradually however I began to enjoy the trips to town looking at dresses in shops with my mother. I could do my own hair in a girlish style, tie the ribbon, and paint my own fingernails. Being a girl was not so bad after all. It was becoming rather a fun experience.

When the holidays ended I thought it's a pity I could not attend a girls school instead of a boys where I was treated as a loner who was not one of the crowd.

Until I was 14 my mother continued to bring Catherine alive some weekends and all the holiday time. Schoolwork became more demanding and I reached male puberty, my voice became deeper, my manhood started to develop. But my experiences as Catherine were not forgotten for I had enjoyed being a girl for a while.

I left school at 16. My parents could not afford to keep me there any longer.

I soon found a job. It was on my second payday, that I went back to Curzons to buy my first girdle. A Berli Sarong High Waisted girdle and a pair of seamed stockings. I began to wear the corset and stockings under my work clothes. I was now on the path to eventually becoming a cross dresser.

 

Over the years John bought a collection of feminine attire, wigs, heels, makeup etc, secretly in hiding at first became Catherine. On occasions he ventured forth alone as Catherine in public. John eventually married so he abandoned all his feminine attire. John's wife produced three children John's passion for the feminine did not die. Several times he built up a collection of dresses, lingerie etc only to abandon them on second thought. But the hidden desire remained. One day of course his wife found out. At first she was not accommodating in his passion. Eventually the hidden virtues of love prevailed, she accepted in part as long as he kept Catherine hidden from the children. Eventually children grow up to leave home. John began dressing about the house and sleeping in a nightdress.

In early retirement John began to dress more often and openly.

It has often been said that a man always marries a replacement woman for his mother.

John as Catherine soon found in his case this was true. Johns wife as a condition of his being able to dress as Catherine had to do the housework, cooking washing sewing ironing, best of all do the supermarket shopping. John's wife Joan made one other condition. Catherine was now to be called Maid Joanna, be treated like a servant.

Act and obey like a servant with all the advantages and disadvantages of servitude as a woman John now enjoys his life much more than in his confused earlier lifestyle.

Joan the wife has now become the woman in charge of all his actions and decisions.

All of Johns and Joan's present friends know her now as Joanna. Joan's women friends, especially like to be served by Maid Joanna, when she is dressed in the black silk French Maids, short skirted uniform with the frilly white tutu style petticoat that reveals her frilly knickers.

 

As his mother did in childhood John have again become petticoated by a woman, his wife Joan? For John now however lives full time now as Maid Joanna. His days as John full time and lonely have become part of the past.

. John's children had been aware of their fathers 'passion' long before his wife Joan's discovery. Maid Cedwen now serves Johns grown up children when they visit.

His grandchildren seem only to know him as Joanna- Grandma's maid who always plays games with them. They appear to love Maid Cedwen ,not associating him with grandfather john-Yet?. Do the really know? I am certain they eventually will in the future. Will however the process of petification of the male child continue in the following generations of the future?

 

Catherine is now called Cedwen. The reason for the change of name is a story in itself.Johns first girl friend and first love was named Catherine. The same name John was given by his mother when she put him in a dress. After Catherine departed from Johns life, He used to dream he was his girl friend Catherine.Later on in life this was thought inappropriate .So a friend a B&D Mistress suggested it would be better if Catherine was to become Cedwen>This is a family name from way back. Now because of the confusion because my present Mistress has called herself Cedwen. Im now called Joanna. Life is confusing for a crossdresser in many ways.

 

 

 

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© 2002 by Joanna Maguire. All Rights Reserved. These documents (including, without limitation, all articles, text, images, logos, compilation design) may printed for personal use only. No portion of these documents may be stored electronically, distributed electronically, or otherwise made available without express written consent of the copyright holder.