A Wish the Heart Makes : Fornever in Blue Genes

by: Tigger

 

Chapter 27: Revelations and Closure

Morag came to slowly. He looked around, taking in his surroundings. Where ever he was, the place seemed somehow familiar. "So, you’re awake, are you?"

He looked in the direction of the voice and saw Mandy standing in the doorway. "So it seems, Ms. Mandy."

A warm laugh washed over him. "Ah, but I’d recognize that brogue anywhere. God, but I’m glad to see you, Morrie, even if you are more Morgan than Morag now."

"They thought they’d gotten the whole process and decided to test it on me. Guess I am luckier than whoever it is they tried to change after me."

"So Teri told us. Evidently the woman who provided the psychiatric data that justified my own transition tried to become Adam and died during the transition."

"Teri’s all right? She saved me, ye know."

"We know. Except for when the team leader revived Cat, the attackers were only using non-lethal weapons, mostly to keep the attack from being a capital crime."

"I know she will have to pay for what she did . . . "

"No one except us knows anything, Morag," Mandy said quietly, "and Cat and I have decided not to say anything to the cops. She saved your life, at great risk to herself, and then would have sacrificed herself to save you again."

"I . . . ah . . . I care for her, Ms. Mandy," Morag said with a bit of a blush.

"Of course you do, Morag. I knew that weeks ago. She’s sweet on you, too."

"She was sweet on Morag, not Morgan or whoever I am now, Ms. Mandy. I don’t suppose there’s much chance I can go back to being me, is there?"

"We don’t know how, Morrie. When they attacked Bob’s Lab, they inadvertently destroyed all his records. We don’t know what he discovered. All we have left are two bottles with my and Cat’s name. We suspect there was a third - one with your name on it, perhaps?"

"Yes, there was. That’s how I got to be this big, hulkin’ brute."

"Well, you’re a damned fine looking big hulking brute, Morrie. As to those bottles, well, I guess that means the stuff in those bottles will work, then, if they worked on you."

Morag thought back to the day Bob had died. "Umm . . . maybe, Ms. Mandy, but there’s somethin’ ya need tae know . . ."

~------------~

Cat found Mandy sitting in her old, or rather Matt’s old office. A cold knot grew in Cat’s gut as she watched the woman she loved sitting behind the big antique desk. Although Mandy wasn’t a small woman, she looked so . . . so tiny behind the huge oak furniture piece, and out of place in a way that had never applied to Matt. At least, she looked out of place to Cat.

*Get a grip, Donovan, and remember that it is HER life and HER choice.*

"Been a long time since I last saw you in here," Cat said aloud, as much to get Mandy’s attention as anything else.

Mandy looked up from report she’d been studying and smiled. "Yes it has, or at least, it seems like a long time. A great deal has happened in these few weeks. Look," Mandy said with that gamine grin that made Cat’s heart skip a beat, "I had to raise the chair several inches. I feel like a kid who needs an old-fashioned phonebook under her butt in order to be able to sit at the grown-ups table for dinner."

"How does it feel? Being out of solitary confinement?"

"It was never that bad, and you know it. Truth to tell, Cat, I miss it and this office feels wrong. I still like the work, but . . . " Mandy shrugged. "So, what about the honcho? Did Teri identify who she was before she turned herself into my twin?"

Cat shook her head. "Nope. Teri claims she never knew the identity of the number one. She thinks only the psychiatrist actually knew for sure. All Teri does knows is that she was personally shocked as hell to find out that the top bitch in a supposedly all-female, anti-male-equality, good-ole-girls movement was at least physically a male."

"What??" Mandy almost shrieked.

"Yup. Evidently he wanted to be a woman, but more than that, he wanted to be a beautiful one, too. Too bad for him but he just wasn’t a good ‘babe’ candidate even after surgery. Too many bones requiring too much sculpting, I guess. From what little Teri heard about him, he was some type of science guru who funneled a helluva lot of Federation research dollars into that facility where they took Morag. When Bob said he’d found the answer, Teri told them, and they decided to replace you with him after he became that clone of you."

Cat paused for a moment, a look of frustration crossing her strongly beautiful features. "More than that, we just don’t know. Hell, we won’t likely ever know, now. That’s one of the reasons I came looking for you. Your evil twin died early this morning from MacPherson’s last blaster shot. She took the full power of that narrow-beam blast square in the face. Damaged her brain as well as her face. The docs couldn’t save her."

"Lord only knows how either of them managed moving at all at that point. That Leader must have shaken off that gut shot I gave her quicker than I thought she could. The drug she took to blunt the post-transition weakness must have been really strong stuff."

"So the doctors tell me," Cat agreed. "She had me dead to rights, too. No way even an amateur could have missed at that range."

Mandy gave a shudder at the thought of being alone and female in a world without Cat Donovan. "I’m just glad Morrie was still alert enough to shoot that bitch before she got a shot off at you, Cat."

"Well, she didn’t get me, and now she’s dead. Hard to believe it’s all over. I just wish we knew who she used to be before they turned her into your twin. I’d really like to know that there aren’t any more like him, or rather, any more like her back home." Cat pulled out a computer-generated sketch. This is the Leader, pre-transformation. At least, as close as our police artists could come from Teri’s descriptions."

Mandy glanced down at the proffered sheet and blanched the instant she looked at the picture. "Oh my god," she whispered in shock, "so that’s what she meant about thirty years . . . "

After a long, silent moment when Mandy said nothing more, Cat asked, "Are you all right?"

"What? . . . Huh? Oh. Oh, yeah." Mandy nodded slowly, her color returning. "It’s just that . . . well, I know this person. He was . . . "

~----------~

*Cooped up in bed AGAIN!* Mandy growled to herself. *Just because those damned sensors Bob glued to my hide went berzerk when I looked at that damned picture. Well, I’m giving this crap about one more hour and then I am out of here!*

She was trying to think of some suitably nasty revenge to wreak on Cat for turning Teri loose on her again when the door started to open. "Okay, Richards, get your skinny blonde butt in here!" she growled. "You and I have got to come to a meeting of the minds about just who the hell runs this blasted company."

"Umm," an only somewhat familiar deep voice said from behind the door. "I am not Richards, Mandy."

"Morrie!" Mandy almost cheered, her mood instantly improving.

Morgan MacPherson came in and sat down beside Mandy on the edge of her bed. "Hi, fellow prisoner. How are you doing? They tell me you had a bit of a spell."

Mandy’s disgusted look made the new man laugh. "I am not ill or sick - my vital signs just spiked a bit, and with just cause, too. It was a shock, okay? It is not every day a person finds out that their thesis advisor has been trying to kill him . . . her."

"So, that’s the truth of it, is it? That Leader was your doctoral advisor?"

"Yep. Teri positively identified him from photos sent here by MIT Security. Now that I know, a lot of what happened makes a good deal more sense. He knew, better than anyone else, where my work was going. Hell, Bob and I brought him in on THE Project several times as a consultant. We tried, evidently unsuccessfully, to compartmentalize what we were really doing to protect the overall goals, but he could have figured it out. He knew me and he knew Bob from way back."

"And he had agents inside," Morgan added. "Knowing what he knew, adding bits from a couple of other compartments would have given away the overall concept easily enough."

"Just so," Mandy agreed.

"So, what are you going to do about Teri?" Morgan asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"If she doesn’t get off my ass soon," Mandy snarled, "I am going to kill her."

"Pardon me?" Morgan asked with a choked laugh. "Off your ass?"

"Damned Donovan sicced her on me again. She is nursing me to make sure that my little episode wasn’t a side effect from the transition."

Now Morgan did laugh. "I see. So, back to my question. You really aren’t going to turn her in?"

"Good heavens, NO, Morrie!" Mandy spluttered. "Good grief, gir . . . I mean, boy. Like I told you the other day, she saved your life twice and then brought you back here in time to save Cat’s and my life when she could have gone to ground and hidden out. I’ve talked to her and believe she was going to change sides anyway. Did you know they wanted her to seduce me? And refused? Her honor wouldn’t let her, particularly after she started falling for you. She’s my friend, and she saved me and two of my best friends in the world. She’s clear with me, Morgan."

"I . . . I don’t know what to do about her," Morgan said quietly.

Mandy snorted. "I’d say courting her would be a good start, fella."

"But, I’m not a fella, Mandy."

"Oh, come on, Morgan. Look, unless we can reproduce Bob’s new process, we can’t take the chance of turning you back, so you are a fella . . . just like I am a gal. Oh, I know you’re a girl in your head, but you’re all man on the outside, and you love a very pretty girl who just happens to return those feelings in spades. So, go out and get fitted for some fancy duds - at company expense since this . . . transition was in the line of duty - and start wooing the girl."

"But she fell in love with Morag."

"She fell in love with *you,* and I can tell you that it was only her worry about how you’d react to girl-girl love that held her back. She was being noble. Now, she’s just afraid that you knowing the truth about her involvement in that group of feminist counter-revolutionaries, would mean you couldn’t love her."

"Now that’s just plain silly!" Morgan retorted.

Mandy was about to answer when the door again opened, this time admitting Teri. Seeing her chance, Mandy popped up out of bed. She grabbed a stunned Teri and all but tossed her into Morgan’s lap before hurrying to the door. "You don’t have to convince me, fella. Convince HER!"

"MorGANNN?!?!?! What are you doingggg . . . hmmmppphhhh??? . . . mmmmmmmmmMMMooorrgannnnn . . . "

Mandy laughed quietly as she slipped from the room and locked the door behind her, leaving her two friends the privacy such first times deserve.

~-----------~

Much to her annoyance, Cat found Mandy sitting in the secure apartment’s sitting room. Cat Donovan being Cat Donovan, she immediately went on the attack. "Just what the hell do you think you are doing out of your bed? And where the hell is Teri? I *told* her to tie you to that damned bed if that’s what it took to keep you there."

A sly smile lit Mandy’s face. "I don’t think there is room for her to tie me up there, although it does sound interesting - with you there with me, that is. Anyway, I am out of my bed because Teri is in it . . . with Morgan."

That stopped Cat short for a moment, before her own smile bloomed. "How did you manage that one, minx?"

"Oh, opportunity, explosive sexual chemistry and a fairly gentle judo toss. No fool, our Morgan. I gave him the opportunity with the judo throw. He took care of the rest."

"Good for him." Cat thought of how she’d like the same opportunity, but refrained from laying that guilt on Mandy. "I brought these for you," she said holding up two small bottles. "Since we know that Bob’s process worked on Morag, I figure it must be safe for you to use the one with your name on it to go back to being a guy."

"I’d wondered where those were," Mandy said, looking at the bottles Cat had set down on the small table. Briefly, she thought about Dr. Thompson’s question, and wondered again how she’d answer it when she next saw the psychiatrist. "But it’s not that sure a thing, that. I mean, just because it worked for Morag, or rather for Morgan, that it doesn’t necessarily mean it would be safe for me, or even you."

"What do you mean? It worked, didn’t it?"

Mandy quietly repeated what Morgan had told her the day before about the difference between Morag’s genotype and Cat’s and Mandy’s.

"So, Morag only had one bad gene set to correct, while you and I have both sets bad . . . at least they’re bad gene sets if you’re a female whose goal in life is to be changed into a male," Cat said as she slowly settled into one of the chairs.

"Right. And since we don’t even know how Bob did the culture tests, we can’t repeat the experiments with those samples to prove whether it is safe or unsafe. I am sure there are other researchers we can find who can figure out how to do them, and who might ultimately reproduce his work, but right now, we just don’t know."

Cat looked over at the two bottles. *She wants to be a man again so badly.* Cat stood and walked over to pick up one of the two amber vessels. *Well, I can help her with that. It’s the least I can do for the woman that I love.*

"I’ll test the stuff. Teri knows how to handle the transition. If I make it through, then you can try it."

Mandy’s face went blank for a moment, but only for a moment. Then the incredible speed and quickness she’d developed had her out of her seat and in Cat’s face. With one smooth, fluid movement, Mandy snatched the bottle from Cat’s hand before the larger woman quite knew what she was about. Without pausing, Mandy spun, and hurled the bottle against the wall, shattering it into small bits and shards.

"Mandy! What the hell are you doing?"

"Stopping you from doing something we’ll both regret, you damned blockheaded woman!"

"But . . . but, I was only . . . I mean, I thought you wanted . . . "

"I want YOU!" Mandy cut Cat off as she turned to advance on the other woman, fire in her normally cool eyes. "For whatever reason this happened, one thing has been true from the get-go. I *LOVE* you. Hell, I’d love you even if you became a man and I stayed a woman, but I need *you* and I need you *alive*!"

"But . . . but . . . you want to be a man, and . . . and . . . I want you to have and be what you want."

*She’s cute when she dithers,* Mandy thought fondly. "Look, Cat, I want to have you and I want to be what you want. Do you think you could ever want Matthew Sorenson? Even a particularly improved Matthew?"

"Well . . . sure. You’d be that Matthew and . . . "

"And you’d *try*. Dammit, suppose you always had to force yourself to remember the Mandy inside the Matt when we loved? You think I wouldn’t know it if you tried to do that?" Mandy recalled Cat’s own words from the time she’d eavesdropped on her and Morag in Cat’s office. No WAY was she going to let Cat have to deal with demons. "And I would absolutely *hate* it! Well, *that* just *isn’t* going to happen. I have got some news for you, Catherine Brenda Donovan, I love you, and I want to make the woman I love happy. If that means being Mandy for you, well, that is a pretty small price to pay for being the person Cat Donovan loves."

Cat couldn’t believe this. She couldn’t *LET* herself believe this. "But . . . "

Mandy cut her off, and then gently flipped the flustered Cat to the floor and straddled her. Taking her face in her hands, Mandy touched her nose to Cat’s. "Now look, Cat. The body is Mandy, but right at this particular moment, the head is all Matt. Don’t you think I am man enough to satisfy the woman I love in all the ways she needs to be satisfied?"

"But . . . but."

"Cat, let me answer that question. Yes, I am *definitely* man enough to be the woman that *my* woman - the woman I love - wants and needs me to be!!"

A burble of almost hysterical laughter shook Cat’s frame. "Man enough to be a woman? Is *that* supposed to make sense?"

"Sure it does," Mandy said smugly. "I love you, you love me. I want you, and you want Mandy. I am Mandy. I will *always* be Mandy for you . . . and for me."

"I’ve always been the care-giver in my relationships, Mandy - sort of the husband, you know? I’ll probably treat you like the "little woman" more than you might expect. You think your manliness can handle letting me take care of you like that? I mean, you’re a really independent person, and I know you’re the tops in your profession, and it wouldn’t mean I think you can’t take care of yourself . . . "

*Guess there’s no doubt how I’ll answer Jan’s question at our next session now,* Mandy thought, happier than she could ever remember being in her life. Gently, Mandy reached up and put a single finger to Cat’s lips. "Hush, Cat. The man I was has felt much the same way about you, except I never had the courage to say so to you. I love you and want to be loved by you. Like I said, I am man enough to be the woman you need, sweet Cat," Mandy repeated, her solemnity making the words a vow. "Just as long as you really do love and want me."

"WANT AND LOVE YOU? ARE YOU CRAZY??"

Suddenly, Mandy found herself wrapped in a passionate embrace and being kissed senseless. Instinct took over and Mandy was soon giving as good as she was getting - which was incredible - beyond anything she had ever experienced in her or Matt’s lifetime.

A very long time later, Mandy roused from the passion-drugged haze that had settled in her brain. "Ummm . . . Cat?"

"Hmmmmmm . . . ?" Cat grunted

"Not that it matters, but which bottle of serum did I smash?" Mandy asked with a touch of a giggle that was quickly cut off by another ravaging kiss.

 

 

 

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© 1996 by Tigger. All Rights Reserved. These documents (including, without limitation, all articles, text, images, logos, compilation design) may printed for personal use only. No portion of these documents may be stored electronically, distributed electronically, or otherwise made available without express written consent of the copyright holder.