A Fistful of Dragons

by Hypatia

  

Part 3

  

Yes, I know you have been waiting damn near forever for this and I apologise profusely for the delay. As you might (or might not) have noticed, I have been very much absent from the lists of new stories last year. What have I been up to; well I have been busy trying to learn everything that I didn't know about writing and that was a hell of a lot. Anyhow I haven't learnt everything but I have reached a point where it is all that my mind can take for the moment. Now I at least know when I am doing things wrong, but it doesn't necessarily mean I will change…I would rather be happy about a story than right.

I have had a number of versions of this conclusion, following many different paths. Sometimes the paths have been very dark; others have played out to an unsatisfactory conclusion. This is the best of the bunch and has a storyline that I am happy with, at least for the moment. If it worked for you please tell me and I can see what else I can write that pulls your strings, if it doesn't work for you please tell me too…I am willing to listen to criticism and I do take note of everything that is said.

My thanks go out to Nora (my very first fan), for suggesting this story…see I did finish it, just for you dear. To everyone who has dropped emails threatening bodily harm if I didn't finish it…you can call off the hit men now.

This is the end of Fistful of Dragons; I have got a good idea for a sequel, 'For A Few Dragons More' and possibly as far as 'The Good, The Bad and The Greek', but at this time they are very much unconnected ideas floating around in my head, when it does erupt it will be posted as one large story and that way you should avoid delays like this, as I tend to get diverted by other things while trying to write. It isn't fair that I should make you wait this long again for a conclusion to a story, and once again for that I apologise.

Hypatia   pboauk@yahoo.com

 

"My, my, at Waterloo Napoleon did surrender
Oh yeah, and I have met my destiny in quite a similar way
The history book on the shelf
Is always repeating itself"

Waterloo:-S. Anderson/B. Andersson/B. Ulvaeus (1974)

 

Dwarven competitions are a serious business, as are most things in a dwarf's life. They are a mountain dwelling people by nature and as such are a hardy people whose trust is not given easily. When given though it is such that none can question it.

I knew my mother and my grandmother had made an impression on the Dwarven people when they had visited. Friendships and allegiances had been formed between The Kingdom and their nation, which had brought them to us in our time of need. This though was unprecedented, even the Dwarven clan chiefs rarely rated an honour guard. Now I had the situation of hundreds of dwarves on the brink of armed conflict over the right to guard me. Tempers were starting to fray.

"Listen to me" I shouted above the hubbub and getting to my feet despite the reluctance of my muscles. The noise continued unabated.

"Oi shut it, you short arsed rejects from Oz!" Yedda roared, over three hundred pairs of hostile eyes turned on her.

"Her Highness is trying to speak to you," she said in a disgusted tone, all eyes moved across to me.

"Look while you are debating the finer points of Dwarven law, relating to contests and tournaments, my kin if they are lucky enough to still live are facing destruction. The Dark Hoard masses and you are arguing over the length of a foot race. My kingdom is invaded and you are deciding if throwing an axe at a tree should be included in your little games," I looked around at the faces the hostility that Yedda had invoked had gone and now, a lot of them were busy studying their feet and shuffling uncomfortably. Yes, I wanted to get some order here, I wasn't expecting this sort of reaction.

"I welcome the offer of your best warriors to protect me, it is an honour that I hope I am worthy of…but a battle awaits," I received complete and utter silence at this statement.

"Er…sorry," Thurn said breaking the silence with a subdued reply.

"Look I welcome the offer of a Dwarven component to my guard, but tomorrow my men and The Drow if they will come march to Des Moines and from there to battle. I would welcome your axes at my side."

"You heard the lady, let's get this shit sorted out now," Thurn shouted at his men and agreement was eagerly had from all. I sat down leaning against Yedda's bulk again her head turned to regard me closely.

"What?" I demanded.

"Just checking there's no dwarf in you, because except for being a little gentle in your approach you could have been any one of their mothers telling them off," Yedda answered her body rumbling with the amusement she felt.

"Not my intention but if it works I have no complaint," I replied.

"Cyrena we have a minor problem," Thurn said approaching me cautiously.

"What?" I asked my hopes of a quick resolution fading.

"We need an impartial judge or honour might be called into question."

"There is one who might question the honour of a dwarf?" I asked aghast at the suggestion.

"Well maybe not honour," Thurn admitted with a grin. "Impartiality might be a better description, for even I have a son and a nephew who will be well placed in any contest."

Again, I got to my feet and looked at the assembled crowd, again I was the centre of attention.

"Does anyone here doubt the impartiality of Michael here?" I shouted. Echoed shouts of 'no' came back.

"Does anyone here doubt the impartiality of Millandra of The Drow?" I asked and again received shouts of no.

"Well there are your judges and I can relax and enjoy the show," I said with a grin. "Thurn you will be my escort to the events, will you not?"

"Queen Cyrena as you know so well my responsibilities are to all my men, a duty I cannot abdicate despite how tempting the thought of being your guard is. So I will gladly accompany you," Thurn said then offered me his arm. Self-consciously I accepted his arm, unwilling to have him lose face in front of his men by refusing him.

"Have you eaten this morning Cyrena?" he asked looking up at me.

"I have had some pastries," I admitted.

"That is no way for a warrior to break their fast, especially with your demonstration of swordplay. Let us leave these masses to Millandra and Michael's deliberations while I take you and your kin there for some food," Thurn indicated Kim.

"Thurn, we would both be delighted to eat with you," Kim announced loudly taking his other arm, a delighted grin spread across his face.

"I leave you in the care of Michael and Millandra," Thurn told his men, "as I have found a more interesting diversion."

"Lecherous old goat," Yedda mumbled. "They are young enough to be your granddaughters."

"Ah my reptilian friend," Thurn replied with a grin "I intend to admire their beauty, not seduce them."

"Go and eat with him," Yedda announced. "If you need me just shout and watch out for his hands, the little buggers get everywhere."

"Dragon try as you may you cannot irritate me when I have such company as this," Thurn smugly told her, "Come we shall eat."

As we left her I felt guilty, I was sure it was loneliness and a little jealousy that provoked her parting jibe, but there was little I could do. I looked back and saw that the young Drow had her attention again. I would have to do something to rectify this situation soon. I couldn't keep neglecting Yedda like this and despite the responsibilities of my position; I would have to make time for her.

"What is wrong with you?" Thurn suddenly asked, "You have a face that is sadder than a mined out shaft."

"Just Yedda, I feel I am neglecting a friend," I admitted.

"She understands," Thurn replied gently "despite her attitude she is wise. When all this is over she will happily monopolise your time."

"If we survive all that is coming she can happily," I assured him.

Back at Kim's residence, we sat to eat. I picked at the food, the apprehension I felt at the task before us returning and destroying any appetite I may have had. Thurn looked at my plate disapprovingly.

"You worry about what we face?" he asked.

"No not for myself," I protested unwilling to be labelled a coward. "I fear what I send good people to face."

"Look Cyrena, I know what we face," Thurn said turning his attention on me fully. "The odds are against us and if we are lucky some of us will come through this alive. But we have some distinct advantages."

"What advantages?" I asked eagerly.

"Well we seem to have some divine help on our side. Which is always a nice thing," Thurn replied with a smile and an upward glance of his eyes.

"We have the fact that most of the forces we face make a rock look intelligent. Yes, I know I have a few lads with me who would lose an intelligent debate with a horse. But those are geniuses compared to your most intelligent ogre and finally we have a plan."

"A plan," I spluttered.

"Yes, however limited it is we know what we are planning to do," he said firmly. "We stop them dead, then wait for The Bastard to come out of his hole. Then it's easy."

"Easy?" I shouted at him, "you say easy…we may have a chance if everything goes our way, but easy doesn't come into it."

"You are worrying about the minor things, like the outcome of a battle. What you need to be worrying about are the things to improve our chances in the battle, because if we lose there is no point worrying about it. We pick the ground, we prepare, wait for them and then we hit them hard."

"Where should we pick then, as the only place we can really hope to hold them is a city?" I asked.

"We build our defences," Tara stated loudly joining us. "Trenches spikes and the like. If we build multiple layers then retreat when necessary we can cause maximum damage."

"Retreat?" Thurn said disapprovingly, "The lads won't like that idea, we pick our ground and fight."

"No not retreat as such," Tara replied with an exasperated tone, "I probably have phrased it wrong as I am not exactly used to military terms. You pick a place where they can only attack from one direction, no chance of them getting around you. Then dig a row of trenches with spikes in, then another and even another. At each stage they have to fight upwards and climb the ditch against our troops."

"The girl might just have something," Thurn admitted.

"No, not me," Tara protested. "The books in the library at the university have this information, from the earliest days after the calamity that created the world. It was deemed important to record all the old ways of making war when their devices were found to be impotent."

"Why do I not know of this?" I asked.

"The books are proscribed, The University will have no part in developing warfare. We will not be a part of killing," Tara replied.

"Listen to me Tara, that is not for you, Malick or The University to decide," I shouted. "That information could have saved countless lives over the years, including my father and grandfather. Now you tell me it is proscribed information. We are facing annihilation and information like this is being hidden from those who could use it."

"There was a weapon of the old times, of such power that it could destroy a city in a second. Scientists like Silvinas and Shakwell who believed it was the only way their kingdom could survive created it. They also believed in their naivety that it would only be used once and never used again. It nearly destroyed the world, every kingdom had to have the weapon and make it more destructive. If it was not for Silvinas changing the world then it is unlikely that the world would have survived as it was," Tara was standing glaring at me as she said this and I felt my anger build, I would not be spoken to by her like this. She was so like her father, forgetting to whom she was speaking to.

"Tara do not begin to lecture me on choices, morality and ethics," I shouted, standing up to meet her face-to-face. "I have taken my Kingdom to war to save the Drow and taken a blade in the gut to save a man. Now I have a responsibility to my people to save them from this threat, a threat the like has not been seen since the wars of the Magicians. This could be the information which at least means some of us may survive."

"But The University cannot be a party to death and war, we are a constructive element not a destructive one and we will never be a part of war."

"So what were you doing with a sword in the Elven forest then, if your principles are so pure?" I demanded of her. "What will you do when Des Moines falls? If The University wishes the protection that The Kingdom affords it, then it has responsibilities especially in times like this. Or that protection will cease."

"You are as much a part of The University as I am," Tara protested, "your mother and your grandmother were part of it and as such you understand our position."

"I have not the freedom to understand your position, I only have my responsibilities to my people," I told her, "and The University if need be will find itself under my direct control."

"What about Father?" she asked tears filling her eyes.

"That is not my concern," I told her walking off back to my quarters and leaving her.

"Wait!" Kim shouted running after me, "wait!"

"What?" I said stopping and waiting for her.

"Don't be too hard on the girl, like you she has been brought up believing what she has been taught. Now she is in a world larger than any that a girl her age should be in and her loyalties are divided between The University and you."

"What about me then?" I demanded, "am I not in a world in turmoil, with all eyes looking to me to solve their problems. How am I to be expected to succeed if things like that are proscribed, by people who have no understanding of what we face?"

"Is that any reason to take it out on a girl who considers you a friend?" Kim asked, her eyes flashing with anger. "Is that any reason to tear her apart with worry about her disloyalty to her father? This girl fought bravely with you, treated the wounded Mellina despite the risk and on the way back damn near killed herself in her efforts to help all. She deserves better from you. If you keep on treating those who you can trust like this, you will be a short lived sovereign."

"What does that have to do with me?" I asked bitterly. "It is unlikely that I will live out the winter that comes so quickly."

"There is nothing to say that you will fall in battle," Kim said losing some of her anger.

"That remains to be seen," I replied suddenly aware that in my anger I may have said too much.

"Cyrena you have responsibilities and as such you not only have to consider the current situation, you also have to consider The Kingdoms future. It can not be left without a clear line of succession and none of your Uncles will step up to take control."

"So they will abandon their duty and responsibilities then?" I asked her.

"They have fulfilled their duties and responsibilities for many years, as will you. You have known for many years what you were destined for and you will fulfil that duty."

"Why should I?" I asked. "Did I not fulfil my duty and my destiny once already? Taking control at Berlin, defending Shakwell against such odds alone and earning my place alongside my father, as I fell in battle with the knowledge that the field was ours?"

"Yes you did your duty then," Kim answered firmly, "But you did no more than I would expect from any of our family. Do you think Fredrick or Thomas would have done any less? Do you think yourself better than them?"

"No, never," I answered honestly. "They would probably do a lot better than me."

"I doubt that, you have a lot more happening than any ruler since Eric founded Des Moines," Kim said in a gentler tone. "Fredrick, Thomas or any of the brothers, including your late father are of an earlier time. War for them was minor skirmishes, violent, messy and generally desperate, unpredictable battles. This is a different arena, we are not talking an incursion or losing a little land, we are looking at the loss of all. You are the only one I know who could have the allegiance of the Drow and the Dwarves. Could you see Fredrick having the patience to deal with the Dwarven rituals and formalities, could you see Thomas trusting the Drow or a dragon? You are here now for a reason and that reason is that only you can succeed and I think you are going to need everyone within your strange entourage to save us all."

I was silent for a moment and Kim placed an arm around me holding me tight.

"You are allowed to be unsure and scared here, out there though you must never once let them doubt you."

"I am scared, I am scared of what has happened to me, I am scared of what has happened to Lizzie and I am scared of what will happen…though not to me," I told her. "What happens to me is of little concern, but what happens to those who trust me and are expecting so much from me?"

"That I cannot say, but with what you have done so far I do not think anything is beyond you," She replied. "Now are you going to go back and make that young girl feel better?"

"Yes," I said and the two of us walked back to the dining area, I found Thurn uncomfortably and unsuccessfully trying to staunch Tara's tears.

"Tara, I apologise for my words, they were cruel and uncalled for," I said, she raised her tear stained face towards me.

"I have sworn, as part of The University, that I will not promote or develop war, too much has been lost down that road. What I have said has broken that oath and I have betrayed my father," she answered between sobs.

"Tara you said what was necessary, you unlike your father have a broader understanding of the world and know what we face. You have may have just saved more lives in one comment than your father has in his life of medicine," she seemed unconvinced.

"Do you consider Cyrena a friend?" Kim asked.

"She is my queen I do my duty," Tara answered.

"That is not the question I asked," Kim replied fixing the girl with her eyes.

"Yes," she admitted turning her eyes away from me.

"Even a king or a queen needs friends," Kim said. "Cyrena more than most, she is young, facing a grave threat and much has happened. She needs your friendship and your comment might have saved her life and the lives of all here. There should be no shame or guilt in that."

Tara began weeping again; I hugged her tight and for some reason found myself weeping with her. Kim joining us was the last straw for Thurn though.

"I should go and find a less dangerous place to be, much longer here and I will be in danger of drowning in tears," he told the three of us with a gruff voice. I let go of Tara, walked over to him, and hugged him tight.

"Thurn I am sorry, there is just so much happening and I am so worried for my people and your people."

"Don't be, we are a people who hide our emotions but I guarantee give my men a skin full of drink and you would have rusted armour all around from the tears. These are testing times and there will be many tears before the end," He hugged me back, the power in his small body threatening to crush me.

"Enough," I gasped. "Shall we finish eating and go and rescue Michael and Millandra?"

"I don't know," he replied without easing up the pressure on me, "I prefer the company here."

"I think I should of heeded Yedda's warning," I told him as I tried to disengage myself from his arms.

"Oh yes I am a lecherous old goat, though don't tell my wife," he said with his customary smile.

"I won't," I promised him.

"Enough" I gasped, "Shall we finish eating and go and rescue Michael and Millandra?"

"Rescue them?" Thurn said easing up the pressure on me but retaining his hold "Michael will be in his element and none will argue with the Lady Millandra, besides where is the fun in arriving before the situation is desperate?"

*****

The arguments seemed to have been resolved by the time that we returned to the tent city, a number of contests were underway with an enthusiastic audience of Drow.

"How's it going?" I asked Michael.

"I haven't got a clue," he replied shrugging his shoulders. "They have some system of scoring that makes no sense at all and from what I can figure out they won't be down to the final few till tonight sometime."

"It is a complex system, utterly fair and demanding all compete against all others," Millandra said.

"Ah well this reminds me of happier times," Thurn replied looking around, groups of dwarves were fighting, others seemed to be running a footrace that included trying to disable your opponent while running, the largest group seemed to be throwing axes at marks on trees.

"Thurn I have never seen a dwarf throw an axe in the battles we have been in, those wounded hang on to their axes as if their lives depended on it," I said wondering about the purpose of it.

"No, it is not their lives that depend on it, it is their afterlives…we have a belief that those who die in battle immediately go to a great and wondrous place," he explained, "feasting, drinking and singing for eternity. But to prove you died bravely you must show your axe and the blood that has been spilt on it, otherwise you have eons explaining how you lost it at the gate, no one wants to miss good drinking time and that is why only during a formal greeting may a dwarf relinquish his axe."

"What of your wives?" Millandra asked. "Do you not spend eternity with your loved ones?"

"Only if we are proven unworthy for The Great Halls," Thurn said his face serious, "otherwise we can visit whenever we wish."

"Oh," I said unsure of how serious he was.

"The last thing they want is us underfoot for eternity, it is a happy solution," he said with a smile. "Come let us enjoy the games, let me show you my kin."

We spent the day cheering the victors and consoling the vanquished, many arguments started, but Michael and Millandra soothed all, without the need for Thurn or I to intervene. One problem that was encountered was the traders, selling food, drink and many other things. They had suddenly appeared as the contests began and The Drow, the majority of those present, had nothing to trade. Thurn and I soon solved it. My Kingdom or more precisely me and The Dwarven Nation would cover all costs that day for as Thurn said 'There is nothing sadder than a man without a drink at a party'. I wondered how I would explain this lavish expense to Henri on my return.

As the day wore on, the number of dwarves drinking their sorrows away grew, and the number still competing reduced. By the early evening it was down to eight of them and to Thurn's delight both his nephew and his son were still in the running.

"Its in the blood you see," he shouted loudly while elbowing me in the ribs.

"They do you and your family great credit," I said trying to ignore the pain he caused me.

"That they do," he said happily. "That they do."

The last event was a form of wrestling; as usual the rules were somewhat vague, though from my understanding edged weapons were frowned upon…as was permanently disabling your opponent.

"This should be good," Thurn, said with a grin, "here the blood ties will do them no favours. Here it will be strength and brains that serve them."

"What are the rules?" I asked as the eight dwarves spread out in the centre of a large circle of spectators.

"If you are knocked over you have lost," Thurn said as the Dwarves suddenly charged at each other with a roar.

Two of them went down as the mass of bodies met in the centre. The six remaining began to physically try and force each other over. For a moment the battle seemed unfair with four against two, but the two managed with some nimble footwork to let one of the attackers fall flat on his face due to his own momentum.

"That's the way lads, you show them which family they mess with," Thurn shouted whilst pounding me on the back and pointing at the two Dwarves. "My kin they are, can you tell?"

"Yes," I assured him trying to manoeuvre so that I was out of reach, I wasn't sure I could survive till the end of the contest.

Again they squared off this time three against two. Two of the three began struggling with one Dwarf while a larger one went one on one with the other. This continued for a good five minutes none of them getting the advantage, the shouting from the dwarves doing little to encourage anyone to a victory. With a butt to the head though by the larger dwarf facing Thurn's kin alone, Thurn's kin was stunned for a second and the two dwarves facing the other of Thurn's kin took the opportunity to barge him to the floor. The contest was over and I was being lifted up and swung around by Thurn.

"He did it, that's my boy, he did it," he shouted. Now I was in danger of being deafened as well as beaten to a pulp.

"Yes he did," I assured him, "what about your nephew?"

"My brothers kin were always a little slow, he shouldn't have got his head so close," Thurn said letting me slip back to the ground and get my breath back. I had just had an object lesson in how strong a Dwarf was and I was in awe.

"Now we drink, tomorrow we march and there will be more than a few with thick heads. Come child drink a drink with those who will die for you, share a drop of ale with those who will give you their blood," Thurn announced thrusting a cup in my hand. I walked to the centre of the circle where the last four now stood.

"This has been a contest like I have never seen before," I shouted. "First I drink to those who failed here, for I know when we face battle again you will not fail there, I pity the foe who stands against the dwarves here today."

I raised my cup to my lips and took but a sip, the cheers stopped for a second as they took a drink from the many assorted drinking vessels that they were using, then they resumed louder. Thurn regained some order, though some were slow to respond, they had been drinking most of the day.

"Can the Drow who have been selected come forth?" I asked and four Drow shyly came forward. They were dark haired, tall and serious, which seemed strange in comparison to the four dwarves who were smiling and laughing.

"Though you had no contest, I know you are as worthy of standing here as any of these dwarves. Look at each other, the allies that stand here are those that you will now depend on, these are the people who hold your life in their hands," the smiles left the Dwarven faces at this statement, they depended on their kin in battle. Now I had told them they would no longer be able to do that.

"Dwarf, Drow or Man, we are all intent on one goal, the end to Silvinas. That is all that matters, not who here lives or dies, for if 'The Bastard' is gone then some will survive. With 'The Bastard' dead, people again can hope and dream. My life I have been told is important, not because I am a Queen, but because it is believed that I will be there at the end, that I shall be one of those who faces him. That is why I accept you as my guard, not for my safety…but for my people…will you keep me alive until that time?" I asked them.

Thurn's son walked forward and laid his axe at my feet and stood back, I was shocked, I had never seen a dwarf willingly relinquish his axe except as part of a formal greeting. Around us the crowd was silent, the actions even silencing the loudest drunken dwarf.

"My axe is my life, with my axe I gain entry into The Halls of the Fallen, it is a good axe that has tasted the blood of many orcs, goblins and trolls," Thurn's son said looking at me, though his eyes occasionally drifted back down to the axe. "If it brings an end to Silvinas for my kin and those of my kin yet to come, I will relinquish my axe and my place in The Halls of the Fallen. To win this battle I will gladly give my life and even without that assurance I would gladly give my life for a queen such as you."

I was stunned…for once in my life I was the one thing that I was always taught never to be, speechless.

A Drow stepped forward.

"My kin here who knew The Singer long before I, have a saying, 'The choice is mine alone.' This was something I would have never believed until I saw The Singer and for the first time I had choice, now though I renounce that…The Choice is yours alone," there was again silence, total silence and again I was speechless.

"I will do all I can to ensure we succeed, if it takes my life, then so be it," I mumbled, an unforgivable sin in my father's eyes.

"Did you hear that?" Michael shouted.

"A Dwarf gives his axe to a woman, a Drow renounces his freedom for a queen and a Queen offers her life for all people," he turned on a rather drunken dwarf. "What do you offer?"

"Me?" the dwarf asked.

"Yes you but not just you, a battle comes a desperate fight against the odds what will you give?"

"Remember what I said about some of my lads losing a debate with a donkey, well your man Michael has picked one of them," Thurn whispered in my ear, I tried not to laugh at the dwarf's confused expression.

"I fight good, I fight damn good…" the Dwarf replied.

"Good, we need more like you," Michael said slapping him hard on the back; Michael knew when to beat a swift retreat.

"What about you?" Michael demanded of a Drow.

"I fight damn good," the first Dwarf interrupted, "I just not run too good, that's why I lose."

"Yes, you fight very well," Michael said.

"Who do you want me to fight?" the dwarf demanded.

"Orcs, goblins, ogres even the cave trolls are in Silvinas's army, that's who I want you to fight,"

"Cave trolls?" the dwarf asked suspiciously.

"Yes big bastards who hide in the caves and mines, they have come out of their caves when Silvinas called…they are waiting for you…"

"For me? They wait for me? I show them, let me get them, they not mess with me…"

"That is what we want to hear Brother Dwarf," Michael shouted. "For the Queen here you will face that which all Dwarves fear and I will be there too."

Again the gathering broke down into cheers and assurances of loyalty and bravery.

"I thank you for your axe and I accept it," I said to Thurn's son, provoking a gasp from some of the closest Dwarves. "I ask that you carry it for me, for there will be much use for it on the path we must follow."

I turned to the Drow.

"While you fight under my banner, the choices of life and death are no longer yours…that decision is mine…but never will you face it alone, I shall be there too. The decisions I make for you, I make for myself too, but should you wish to leave my service at any time, that choice is always yours."

The Drow and the Dwarves bowed to me, then through some unspoken decision formed up behind me. The Drow that had spoken and Thurn's son took position either side of me.

"Your name, please Sir?" I asked of the Dwarf.

"I am Drurn, son of Thurn," the dwarf replied proudly. I could see the resemblance to Thurn in his features, though he seemed to lack his sire's joviality, a much more serious Dwarf than his father.

"And your name Sir?" I asked of the tall Drow on my left hand side.

"Eferu," he replied with a bow.

"Well Drurn, Eferu here in the presence of friends I am safe, go and enjoy yourselves, celebrate this night. It may be a long time before we have another night like this." I said to them. The Drow and Dwarf looked at each other for a moment.

"No Ma'am," Eferu replied.

"I am afraid I agree Ma'am, the responsibility for your safety now lies with us, not with you…you shall have an escort at all times," Drurn replied.

"Must it be all of you?" I asked thinking of the impracticality of doing anything with eight armed escorts all the time.

"No," Drurn replied after a moment's consultation with Eferu. "Here you shall just have us, at other times we shall decide what is required."

"Don't I have a say in this?" I asked slightly irritated by the attitude being shown.

"And what about me?" Michael asked.

"You Michael Master of Horses, I respect. I have seen you fight and you fight well," Drurn said, "If you feel The Queen needs more to guard her I will always listen, if it is less then you just waste your words on the winds."

"What about me?" I asked again.

"Ma'am, I have vowed to keep you safe, my axe is yours, my life is yours, my honour though is mine alone and that will not be compromised." Drurn said firmly.

"There is no point arguing with the boy," Thurn said. "He takes after his mother in that respect, just no reasoning with the woman. Your best solution is to accept it, besides you have made more than a few enemies out of the Elves and I am sure Silvinas has a spy or two."

"Are you suggesting I would be at risk within my own Kingdom?" I demanded.

"I'm suggesting that enough people dislike what you stand for, for you to be at risk in your own bed," Thurn replied.

"That is preposterous and insulting to my people and my men," I said.

"It can be whatever you want it to be," Yedda said pushing her way through the crowd, which parted before her easily, "but at the end of the day this is common sense. Lots of people out there want you dead, your guard here will stop that with their lives now shut your bitching and accept it."

"Yedda," I warned with an edge to my voice.

"Don't try that shit on me, it only works when I know I am in the wrong. This time I am right, people with a dream have a nasty habit of ending up very dead. Their dream may live on but for our purposes that is not going to be enough. We need you alive and though I like you, I don't mind making myself unpopular by contradicting you publicly. These kids looking after you don't work for you, they are outside your sphere of control and I make it clear that they will answer to Michael, James and I if anything ever happens to you," she looked at The Dwarves and The Drow. They stood firm meeting her somewhat threatening gaze with a determined expression, despite the fact that her huge head passed within inches of them.

"Yedda, I don't need…" I started to say but was suddenly interrupted.

"You don't know what you need, you have had one battle and a skirmish against the elves…you haven't seen anything yet. I have been there, I have seen the chaos after Silvinas first changed the world, I have seen the magicians try to wrest control of the lands and I have seen people I care for die again and again. Its one of the things you have to accept when you live as long as I have, everything dies…but after being stuck on my own for so many years if you think I am letting you die now, you have another thing coming."

"I'm amongst friends, family and my people, I don't need anyone following me around," I protested with less conviction.

"No Hon, you are alone, vulnerable and many would benefit from your death. Now shut up and do as you are told, it's not often I agree with a dwarf, but this time I do," she replied, "so for me please…do as Drurn says, he knows what he is talking about."

"For now yes, but we organise this properly with Sword Master James when we get back to Des Moines," I replied trying not to sound as if I had conceded too much. Yedda rumbled in approval and Eferu of the Drow seemed to be in agreement…Drurn it seemed was unconvinced.

"Get the measure of this man, James, before you condemn him," Thurn said. "I have met him in his youth and I know if he has become half the man he had the potential of he will be a soldier to be reckoned with."

"Father, I listen to you and I do agree with you but this is a matter of duty and honour, it cannot be compromised," Drurn replied.

"Who would be able to make a son of mine compromise his honour or neglect his duty?" Thurn asked. "All I ask is that you listen to him, occasionally a different viewpoint can be valuable."

"The Sword Master will never ask you to compromise, if anything you might find that he increases your work," Michael said, "for ultimately the safety of the Queen is his responsibility."

"I will talk to the man," Drurn conceded.

The night proceeded in a subdued manner for me. Drurn and Eferu accompanied me everywhere, not in a particularly conspicuous way, but there enough for me to know. I found people being even more deferential to me and ended up talking to Kim.

"People don't seem to want to talk with me," I said.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"I don't know," I admitted irritated by my inability to express myself better.

"I think I do," Tara said gently as I sat next to Kim, since the argument in the morning she had little to say to me.

"Please, go on," I said to her.

"You are becoming a legend, people are unsure how to talk to you…" she said hesitantly.

"What do you mean, legend?" I asked.

"I see what Tara is saying," Kim interrupted. "Clifford, Prince of Des Moines was easy to talk to, he was a boy with his mind on the things that concern boys. In the battle at Berlin, you became Prince Clifford The Ogre Slayer, someone for your men to follow, but still someone they could relate to. As King Clifford defending Shakwell and your men you took on another aspect, not just one Ogre, but five and Silvinas you faced and there you gave your life for a man."

She paused for a moment looking at my face to see if I understood, I was starting to. These were just things I had done though, things that had to be done.

"You are saved by Shakwell and from a King we suddenly have a Queen, when what we need most is a strong king. What do you do, you befriend a dragon, ally with The Drow, raise The Dwarves, declare war on The Elves and rescue thousands of enslaved Drow. You now raise an army to defeat Silvinas…people are unsure of you, you are the stuff of legends."

"No I'm not," I protested.

"You are," Tara said, "look around you, see those that you travel with, listen to the deeds that you have done…you are a Warrior Queen, at the time when we most need a warrior."

"If anyone can face Silvinas it is you," Kim continued, "and I feel that you maybe more important in the scheme of things than even Shakwell. For many an age he has fought with Silvinas, never bettering him, but now there is something new…something that there has never been before…you."

"Many walk their own path," Thurn said joining us, "they make their own way in this world, but make little impact. You though walk all paths."

"All paths?" I asked.

"Yes you walk with The Drow, The Dwarves and Men, you walk as a King and a Queen and as royalty and common soldier. You are all things to all people," he continued.

"But what am I?" I asked. "What of me? I don't want all this, I don't need all this, I just want people to treat me as normal. "

"You have a duty inherent with your position, that you have known all your life. Personal feelings do not come into it, you are Queen and as such an image is expected. You are queen and that is something that only you can bear," Kim said and I was silent.

I made my way to bed early that night ignoring the ongoing celebrations; even the guards that took position at my door didn't rate a comment from me. I was willing to accept the fact that my life was forfeit, but the continuing reduction of my options and my liberties was hard to take. I wondered had my Father felt trapped in a path that he had no option but to follow, had he known he would die on the field at Berlin?

"Being King is not a privilege, it is a duty and a responsibility, your life is just one thing you may be called on to give," my father had often said, now I knew that my life was but one thing I would have to give up for my kingdom.

*****

The next morning we parted with the women and the children of The Drow and I said my goodbyes to my aunt. It was a strange parting, as both of us knew that the odds were that we would never meet again, yet all Kim's hopes rested on me…a legend. Many hangovers added to the subdued mood of the column and it was an almost eerie silence as we marched away from Warrington. It was a city that seemed far removed from the war we were marching towards, it more than anything reflected what could be achieved in the kingdom if there was peace. It more than any other city would feel the ravages should the war swing this way, they were defenceless. I did not doubt though should the city fall, that Kim would die on her feet, fighting as a woman should not and leading those of her city into battle.

It still felt wrong though; Mellina, Millandra, Kim and Tara should not be involved in anything as squalid as a war. Mellina should not have fallen a knife in her gut in the filth of a forest, at the hands of an elf. A war was no place for women; they were the stable factor in a soldier's life. The battle won, the women would be awaiting his return. My own present position in this scheme of things was unclear, but as Yedda had said I was a creature of magic…I was outside the rules.

*****

The trip back to Des Moines was quicker and far less eventful than the trip out. On the way parties of men were awaiting us; cavalry, infantry and archers, camped waiting for the queen to pass by. Thomas had done well; many thousand joined us all raised by him alone. If this were repeated across The Kingdom it would be the largest force that had ever been mustered. More and more minor royalty joined us too, old men who had ridden with my grandfather and my father, full of important fatherly advice to impart on me. Young men, shocked that a queen should be so young, keen to try to advance themselves through marriage or even to try for a little recreational activity.

I though was impenetrable in more than one way; I had too much on my mind to listen to lecherous old men or naive youngsters. I had more time for The Drow and The Dwarves than the human contingent of our force, only those men I had ridden out with, those who had proved themselves in battle did I listen to. Then rank was no importance for they had done their duty for me.

"Cyrena, this cannot continue," Michael said on the fourth day of our journey.

"A Cyrena matter, it must be serious Michael," I said with a smile.

"It is, I can understand battle changing men, I have seen it often. I don't think there is a man alive who has come out of a battle the same man they went in. This with you though is something different, it worries me," he said.

"What does?" I asked with a smile for his concern.

"You do, you are not with us. You are not Clifford, you are not Cyrena who rode out of Des Moines with me, you are not even the same woman in the Elvin forests. You have the look of one who is already dead."

"I am dead my friend, I died in battle," I answered. "This that you see before you is not me, it is but a form brought into existence for purpose of the gods. What free will they left me, is stripped from me in the name of duty."

"Cyrena, you have a duty and responsibility of care to this kingdom," he replied with an edge to his voice.

"Do you think I could forget that?" I asked.

"No…" he replied and let his horse fall back, far behind me. A short time later it was Yedda who broke the silence I seemed to carry around with me.

"What's up kid?" she asked. "Wrong time of the month?"

"No nothings up," I assured her.

"Don't try to pull that crap on me, I have been there remember. Now tell me what's up or we stop this march here and now, until I get some answers."

"It's nothing important, there is too much else going on to worry about it."

"My concerns in this little war are the little things, things like The Drow. The greater scheme of things, if your kingdom survives or falls is of little importance to me. You though are one of those little things so important to me, now start talking."

"I am no longer me and what little there is of me left, has been taken over by this mission. From here on I am just a tool of others, no free will, never to find space and be myself," I said feeling very foolish.

"I can understand that, there are a hell of a lot of things going on in your life. Now what are you going to do about it?"

"Do about it…nothing, I know my duty," I replied.

"There is more to life than duty," Yedda replied.

"Life is duty and responsibility, they are inseparable," I said and Yedda made a disgusted sound, before dropping back too. From behind me she made no effort to prevent me hearing her.

"She needs to get herself a life, too long have people been moulding and preparing the child for a life not of her choosing. She needs to do her own thing for a few years and preferably find a good man to have some fun with."

"This is a time of war…" Michael protested, "we need her."

"When there isn't a war you are your own man, she has never been herself for more than a few minutes before someone imposed a role on her. If you need her to deal with Silvinas you are going to have to back off, otherwise I doubt she will make it home, let alone through another battle."

I smiled at this, as always Yedda's concern was for others, yet she had it wrong despite her intuitive knowledge of people. I would not fall before my time, my duty was clear, if I was to save my people I must face 'The Bastard', I must give Shakwell enough time to kill him…then my duty would be done.

After that people left me alone, even my guard fell back and though never far from me were less visible. The days blurred one day so much like another that distinguishing them became impossible only the increasing familiarity of the landscape gave credence to the suggestion that we were making progress. This was not the mad dash out for help, I had done all I could on this journey and now with all that had been going on in my life I was weary, mentally and physically drained.

It was with an enormous sense of relief that I laid eyes on my beloved Des Moines, surrounded by the mass of creatures gathering at her gates. From this distance race could not be determined, but as we had shown, race was but a minor thing. These were allies, these were our hope of salvation and as I looked out across the huge army, for the first time in a long time I felt hope.

*****

Our entrance to the city was made with no ceremony, as we got closer to the city we could see columns of men and dwarves approaching from many directions. To the casual observer we were just another mixed cavalry and infantry unit, answering the call. The sea before us parted though, silently, reverently as we passed through. The sounds of soldiers relaxing giving way to hushed tones as we approached.

We passed through the open gate without a word, the guards came to attention and we were inside the city. As we made our way through the outskirts and the commercial district people stopped and stared, openly gawping at the ragtag group that had entered their city. I looked at the troops I had with me, Dwarf, Man and Drow were exhausted. They had fought a battle against the Elves and many still bore the scars of that battle. These were not what people were expecting at their time of need, they expected the gaudily dressed provincial forces led by some minor baron who had invested a fortune to make his men look the part. I urged my mare on a little faster taking the lead in the procession through the city, my guard following me and Yedda accompanied by Michael, Tara, Thurn and Millandra following. Outside the walls of The University, a city within the city, I stopped and dismounted. I could hear the gasp from Tara and the reassuring mumbling of Thurn even though they were still some distance away. The doors at the gateway were closed, as they always were. The University was a self governing unit within the city, it had been decreed long before my fathers time that knowledge should be open to all who seek it and because of that my rule ended at the doorway. As such no king had ever set foot in The University as a king, though many nobles studied there, to step inside was to abdicate a responsibility to The Kingdom.

I banged on the door loudly and a smaller door, set within the larger doors, opened.

"Your Highness, I will inform Dean Malick that you await him," a young well-muscled man said and began to push the door closed again, it closed despite my efforts to stop it.

"I demand entry to The University," I shouted loudly.

"One moment Your Highness, I will bring Dean Malick here," a voice shouted back and my temper flared. I was being left waiting at the gate as if a common tradesman.

"Yedda," I shouted.

"Yes Hon," she said ambling forward to stand besides me.

"Remove the doors please,"

"Whatever you say Cyrena," she said taking position in front of the huge doors as I and many others put some distance between us and them, "I must say it's nice to see you back with us."

"What do you mean?" I asked, only for it to be lost in the roar of a thousand furnaces. It wasn't the blast of flame like had been used against the Elves; it was a narrow controlled flame of immense heat.

"One moment Hon," she said as she took a deep breath and shouted. "Anyone behind the gate now is a very good time to run."

Again she blew a jet of flame at the doors and in the centre now holes were starting to appear in the glowing wood. With a huge paw she struck the centre of the doors ignoring the heat and flame and they shattered sending burning splinters in many direction.

"What I was saying, was it's nice to see you taking an interest in things again," Yedda said brushing some of the burning debris out of the way. "For a while there you had me a little bit worried, but if they can piss you off this much you are definitely connecting with the world."

People were running around in the courtyard, The University in size was many times the size of Des Moines castle and the numbers of people here was normally in the thousands. A small group of dwarves came running towards us, axes ready to defend their fellow scholars.

"HALT!" Thurn roared. "You shall not take up arms against The Queen, in the city where you live by her tolerance."

The dwarves halted, axes held limply at their sides, confusion on their faces. Not many dwarves still came to learn the skills of The University, but those that did considered themselves scholars above all else. They wanted to defend this place, but the conflict in honour forbade it.

Others were coming out now, some with real weapons others with improvised ones; senior lecturers seemed to be trying to arrange some form of defensive line against our intrusion into the establishment.

"Stand down," Michael roared, "this is not a battle."

"You have invaded the sanctity of The University, you of all people I would have thought understood the importance of our freedom," Malick said forcing his way through the lines. "I might have expected this action from your father or grandfather, but you Cyrena, never. Perhaps the magic has changed you more than I first recognised, for the boy Clifford would have never done this."

"The boy is long dead Malick, though it was not the magic that killed him. He died on the field of battle, he was reborn as you see now and none that have stood with me doubt that the same blood flows through my veins, as flowed through Clifford's and my fathers. Do you question my identity? Do you doubt my heritage back to Eric?" I demanded.

"No, no…of course not child, but something troubles you to take this action against us here. We are just scholars here, with little understanding of the outside world, knowing nothing of the ways of the warrior. Here we contemplate things other than violence, here is a place of tranquillity for all who enter these halls," Malick replied trying to sooth the situation.

I was in no mood to be appeased.

"Child, you call me child, again I say I have left childhood far behind. I am The Queen; your University stands or falls by my word alone. I believe that there are texts here dealing with the matters of war, old texts from long ago…I want them now," I said.

"Cyrena, knowledge is open for all, anyone may come here to learn and receive guidance on their education, but we will not teach war."

"I want those texts and I want them now," I said.

"And if I refuse?" Malick asked.

"If you refuse I will ask Yedda to pick a building of her choice and burn it, that will continue until only the Library remains, then I will have every book moved to the castle and burn that too."

"We have our rights, The University is separate from the state," Malick shouted his face taking on an unusual shade of purple.

"You shall still have your rights, all members of The University can remain here, amongst the ruins. Anyone who steps outside the gates will serve a term in the army."

"Your Highness, there are some things that it is better to keep safe from the world, secrets that the people of the world should be shielded from. Once those secrets are made known there is no way they can ever be made secret again. The world as we know it would never be the same again."

"Our world can never be the same, the forces of Silvinas bear down on us and soon we will be swept aside…unless I can find an advantage. You, Dean Malick, stand between me and the knowledge I may need to save my people. If I must remove you and The University to get that knowledge, I will, without hesitation. I will disperse your students and faculty to the armies and do without a seat of learning in my lands."

"We are scholars, artists, musicians and poets, unused to the discipline of a military life and unsuitable for the business of death. What use would we be in a battle and what use would we be after? Learning and creating needs a frame of mind and an army would surely break the spirit of a more…a more studious and creative soul. The military life is a good life for those who have the temperament for such a life, for others though it is an unsuitable path to follow."

"They don't need you to be good soldiers Malick, though a smart boy like you would learn very quickly. They just need you to stop a better man dying first and you will have done your bit," Yedda said. "Now lets stop pissing around and let me rip this place apart. If I take it to bits brick by brick I'm sure we will find their stash."

"Your Highness," Malick said pleadingly.

"No Malick, the time for pleasantries and pleading has long passed. We are at war and I want those texts…otherwise this distinguished establishment will be rubble," I replied.

"Cough up now or this place is history," Yedda shouted then let loose a stream of flame into the air. The motley group of students and staff that opposed us backed off…except for Malick.

"Malick you have no choice, this is not a request it is an order and should you refuse, you endanger yourself and the people here who are your responsibility. Get the books now or we will find them."

Malick glared at Tara, then called two of the lecturers to follow him, a few minutes later the three of them returned heavily laden with leather bound books.

"Your Highness, the texts that you requested," Malick said as if nothing had happened. "As for the young woman with you, she is no longer welcome at this establishment, will you please inform me where you wish her belongings sent."

"Listen to me little man," I said with venom in my voice and striding up to stand before him. I looked up into his face ignoring the fact that though he may have been a small man, he now had a fair few inches on me.

"Your daughter is one of the bravest people I have known, as arrows flew and people died at the hands of the elves she fought to try and save the life of The Lady Melina of the Drow. You have not earned the right to look at her with scorn…" I paused for a moment, my anger getting the better of me, when Thurn intervened.

"I owe that girl much, many of my lads wouldn't be here today without her help. Would you like to discuss your opinion outside?" he stroked his axe lovingly as he spoke, something that even Malick couldn't misinterpret.

"Outside, why would I wish to step outside? I have no wish to fight you dwarf; I am a man of peace as this university is a place of peace not war. She has corrupted that which we stand for and it is obvious that there is no longer a place for her here. That is my right and not even Her Highness can change that decision."

"Malick, your daughter brings great credit to you and your family," I replied, "it is obvious that your disinterest in her has been fruitful. You must pay less attention to more people; if this is the calibre of person it creates. Let's get out of here, this place is too narrow minded for my taste."

Yedda edged forward bringing her huge head right up before Malick.

"Malick," she said, "when the wolves and the monsters are at your door, who will protect you? When you lie bleeding and beaten…who will heal you? When you are dying who will hold your hand as you make that final journey?"

"What are you talking about?" Malick demanded.

"No man is an island," Yedda said turning to leave.

"You speak nonsense," Malick shouted at her.

"No," she replied, "you do not have the wisdom to understand."

"I have wisdom, I am Malick…I am The University…"

Yedda was silent as we left and as we made our way towards the castle his voice followed us, "I am Malick, I am The University."

*****

James met us as we made the final approach to the great walls, the smoke from The University having alerted him that something was happening. As he approached he saluted three times with his sword, first to me then to Thurn who replied by raising his axe and then to Millandra who nodded her head in acknowledgement.

"I see before me a ragged group of travellers, looking almost like beggars on the road," he said his eyes fixed on me. "Surely I have taught you better?"

"You have Sword Master," I replied, feeling drained of emotion after the confrontation with Malick.

"Who are you Sir?" Thurn asked stepping forward.

"I am James, Master of Swords for Her Highness," James said.

"You have changed much over the years Sword-master. Now answer me this, must I take issue with every man in this city over their attitude to the women of our group?" Thurn asked his axe at the ready.

"No Sir Dwarf," James said firmly. "You have strange defenders Your Highness…welcome home."

"Thank you James," I said still unnerved by this man.

"Your Highness," he said his face breaking into a rare smile. "The Kingdom has been awoken, a force the likes this world has never seen before marches on this city. The Dwarves and Drow are coming and they all speak of the deeds of Cyrena, Queen of this land. They come to fight for you, to march to your call, to rally to your standard."

"They are still coming?" I asked slightly disbelievingly.

"Oh yes they are coming," he said his grin getting bigger, "they are coming to fight for the Warrior Queen. I doubt even your father could have done more."

"No one could have done more," Thurn said still standing before James. "Now we have crossed this land twice, at a pace that has even my lads weary, we have fought battles against immense odds and freed a people. By what right do you criticize her?"

"Because if I did not, I would be remiss in my duty," James said with passion in his voice. "I will never fail in my duty of making her the best soldier and leader of men that this Kingdom has ever seen."

"Sword Master, that is one duty that you have done well," Thurn said lowering his axe.

"Yes, but there is always room for improvement. Now come Sir Dwarf, tell me your name and then you can tell me all of Cyrena's deeds and where you feel she is still lacking," James said offering his hand.

"I Thurn, say she is lacking in only one area, she does not yet know how to enjoy life. She worries too much for one so young, after this war is over I intend to change that."

"Welcome Thurn, I an my men are at the service of you and your men while you are here. I would wish to speak to you at sometime about the Elves, the threat they might pose and their tactics in your battle," James said.

"I am ever at your service," Thurn said.

"Come on you two, I am not standing around in the street all day," Yedda grumbled. "Get them talking, duty, responsibility and tactics and we will be here till the sun goes down. The kid did a good job James, no one could have done better and we are covered in filth because we have been marching for days and have fought one hell of a battle. Now tell her she has done a good job and lets get into the castle."

"Your Highness," James said, "well done, your father would have been very proud of you."

"Thank you James," I repeated.

James and his men escorted us the last stretch up the hill to the castle. His presence seemed to give validity to my position amongst my people, he being recognisable to everyone within the city. They cheered their queen, who they did not recognise, the last quarter mile and I knew that I would do what was necessary for these…my people.

*****

Inside the castle was a bustle of activity. This was no longer a home and a symbol in the centre of the greatest city in The Kingdom, this was a castle preparing for war. Supplies were being shipped in, in preparation for the possibility of siege, men were training and makeshift smithies were occupying the large open area near the kitchens. Gwinn's joy at seeing me was tempered by her disappointment at the state I was in; she seemed to ignore the fact that we were all in a similar state.

"I thought that you were going to show her how to act?" she said turning to Tara. Tara's tears though caught her by surprise.

"What is it child, come tell me," she said more gently to the distraught girl.

"My father has disowned me…he has ejected me from The University…I have no home…" she replied between huge sobs. Gwinn cast her eyes at the men, her glare made them suddenly decide they had to be elsewhere…rapidly. James and Michael, with James muttering about a 'rapid strategic withdrawal', plucked the last male remaining under her gaze to safety. Thurn went with the two men willingly, this was no strategic withdrawal, it was a rout. My guard ignored her totally.

"That man is a fool," Gwinn said taking her by the hand and pulling her towards the kitchen. Seeing my and Millandra's hesitation Gwinn turned back to us, "Are you going to stand there all day like a parade with nowhere to go or are you coming into the kitchen?"

"We're coming," I assured her indicating the way to Millandra before following her, the Drow and Dwarves of my personal guard followed.

"And what do you think you are doing?" Gwinn demanded of them.

"We are The Queens guard," Drurn replied.

"That's nice for you, now find somewhere else to be…" Gwinn said ominously.

"We guard the queen," Eferu added somewhat cautiously.

"I don't care what you think you do, you lot standing around will disrupt my kitchen. Now go and find something to do…or else…"

I could see the thoughts crossing Drurn's face; duty was tempered by self-preservation and a dwarf's natural deference to women.

"We are sworn to protect the queen…" he replied cautiously.

"I am sworn to feed the castle and bring misery to all men who think they know better, go and defend the gate or polish your swords, anything away from me and my kitchen…" Gwinn began striding off, escorting Tara without a glance back to see if she had been obeyed, Gwinn didn't need to look, she expected obedience. I did look back and saw Drurn stop Eferu from following us; he knew when he was beaten. They took up position next to Yedda in a clear corner, I was happy at least she would have company.

"Now tell me what has that man been doing now?" sitting Tara down at her usual table.

"It is my fault, Dean Malick had texts hidden…describing methods of warfare unknown to us. I insisted that he bring them, because we are going to need every advantage we can get," I said apologetically.

"That makes sense to me," Gwinn said dismissively, "we are facing the full might of Silvinas, what is his problem?"

"The University has no part of war, I shouldn't have mentioned the books, I shouldn't even have known of them, but father hid little from me," Tara said and began weeping again.

"That man is annoying me," Gwinn said firmly, "someone needs to put the fear of Silvinas into him."

"He did not seem bothered by The Singer," Millandra replied.

"The Singer?" Gwinn asked.

"The Drow's name for Yedda," I answered.

"Ah, it suits her," Gwinn said nodding. "His mind is probably on other things, things far more important than mere fear."

She sat there for a moment her arm around the weeping girl, trying to comfort her.

"Sarah," she called after a few minutes.

"Yes Gwinn," an older girl said appearing before her.

"Go down to the University, tell Karen who runs the staff there that I am reassigning all of them back up here. Then go and see Clive of the Merchants, tell him that no merchant is to deliver goods to The University…if they want to eat they will have to learn to shop and to cook."

"Father cook?" Tara said, her tears fading in astonishment.

"Yes cook, or starve, either one is fine by me. At some point he will have to come up the hill and talk to me, then he and I can discuss this situation," Gwinn said angrily.

"Father…" Tara said uncertainty in her voice.

"Listen child, I have known your father for many years, long before he became such an important person. He was an idiot back then and he is still an idiot, nothing has changed in forty years, except of course that he is more set in his ways. Let's see how he copes when his Beloved University is left to fend for itself, there will be no services provided for them."

"Can you do that?" Tara asked.

"This castle deals with almost everyone in this city, for functions the manpower or rather womanpower needed here is phenomenal. Cyrena might be queen of this kingdom, but I have the power in this matter," Tara looked in my direction for confirmation.

"Even my father never risked antagonising Gwinn," I said with a reassuring smile.

"Oh he did once, but only once," Gwinn replied giving Tara's hand a squeeze. "Don't worry, a week of this and he will be here his tail between his legs, then we can get to business. As for a home, I seem to have noticed more than a few rooms available here. Maybe you should have a word with the landlady and see if she can put you up?"

"Tara, you are always welcome to stay here and I hope this castle can be a home for you. In less troubled times it has always been a warm and welcoming place," I said at Gwinn's prompting.

"I know your family have always taken in homeless and destitute girls, I suppose I am in that position now…" Tara replied hesitantly.

"Tara," I said firmly as I stood up to walk to the side of her chair, "you are in this position because of me, for that alone I am indebted to you and for that alone you shall always have a room here. However, you are my friend and my comrade, we have been through the Elvin forest and survived the arrows of the foe together, that is a bond that surpasses any debt that I might owe you. You are always welcome and the best that my home has to offer is yours."

She looked up at me her eyes filling with tears, "Do you mean that?" she asked even more hesitantly.

"Yes, you are always welcome here as my friend, as my comrade and as my responsibility. In that order of importance," I replied giving her hand a squeeze. "Gwinn, we are going to need rooms. Thurn of the Dwarves will probably decide to sleep with his men, but there should be a room available for him and a room for Lady Millandra of the Drow."

"My Lady," Gwinn said nodding in acknowledgment to Millandra who had been very silent.

"I thank you, but no title is necessary. I am just Millandra as my mother was just Mellina."

"Mellina may have had no title but she was never 'just' anything," I said quietly. "Even in the short time I knew her I recognised she was something special, as did Michael."

"I think her death hurt him," Tara said. "He would have stayed to the end, even if it cost him his life."

"He would have stayed, though he knew it would cost him his life," I corrected her. "I have things that I must attend to, can I leave you two in Gwinn's capable hands?"

They both agreed and even though my father would have berated me for such rudeness towards guests, but Gwinn was eager to hear of our adventures. As I left I could even hear Millandra losing some of her natural shyness with Gwinn's help.

It was as I was approaching my quarters that the strange young man intercepted me.

"Clifford…Cyrena I mean…" he said his voice very unsure.

"Yes can I help you?" I asked.

"It's me, I heard you were back," he said.

"Sorry, I can't remember your name, I'm awful with names…it was at one of the quarterly assizes that we met wasn't it?" I said bluffing; I had no idea who this man was.

"It's me, Lizzie," he said, for a moment or two the world swayed, only his strong arms prevented me falling.

"Lizzie?" I asked backing off from him slightly. "How did this happen?"

"Exactly the same way it happened to you, I decided to see what these gods, that Shakwell believes in would do when put to the test. I couldn't think of living without you…" he said his voice betraying his emotions.

"I know," I replied gently, "I was here when Shakwell started, I was out when you did it…trying to die…trying to die a hero's death that I had earned."

"I was told, they say you found an ally, a dragon," he said.

"Yes and the Dwarves and Drow too," I replied. The situation was floundering, becoming forced and wooden, something that had never happened before with Lizzie and I.

"What do I call you now?" I asked. "Lizzie is hardly appropriate now."

"No, it isn't," he said hesitantly, "I use William now, though if you don't like it we can pick something else."

"No it's a fine name," I replied.

"Look can we go inside," he asked indicating the door to my quarters. "We can't talk out here and we do need to talk."

"Yes," I replied after a moments thought, I disliked the thought of being alone with this man, but how did I know he was my Lizzie?

"How do I know you are you?" I asked.

"Because of what happened the night that we told your father we were to be married, what happened before hand," he said. I flushed at the thought of those few stolen moments with Lizzie before all this happened and I actually felt excited, this body was reacting.

"If we go in there, I want your word that nothing will happen…" I said firmly and saw I had hurt William with this.

"I wouldn't," he pleaded. "It was Clifford the person that I loved and I would do nothing to hurt him, even if he is now Cyrena."

"Sorry," I apologised quickly, "that was unfair of me and from the bottom of my heart I am sorry I said it. Elizabeth the person I loved long before I saw her as Elizabeth the woman, not that I didn't find the woman interesting."

"I know," he said with a smile, "and the interest was mutual."

Inside my quarters I suddenly felt very self conscious, I had been on horseback for days and even I could smell the aroma of horse. I was still dressed in riding gear and armour, with my sword and shield. Lizzie, or rather William, was quick to help me remove my breastplate and I realised I was acutely aware of his presence.

"I am glad you are up and about," I said. "I have managed to acquire a number of books on warfare from The University. I am going to need some help reviewing them and seeing what is of any use."

"Certainly," he said. I found myself studying him for a moment; the piercing blue eyes demanded my attention, as did his physique. This was Shakwell's magic working overtime; this was an example of Elvin perfection…right up to his blond hair. Then it suddenly struck me this was a figure that epitomised everything the people expected of a king.

"Michael had two men carrying them, if you wouldn't mind finding them as I get cleaned up," I asked.

"I will see you in the library then," he said with disappointment in his voice.

"Give me a little time," I said taking his hand in one of mine, "I still love the person, I just need time come to terms with things."

"You still love me?" William asked his eyes full of tears, I hugged him tight, even more aware of his masculinity and the state I was in.

"Always," I assured him. "See if you can get Gwinn to sort out water for a bath for me, I stink."

"I wasn't going to mention it," he said with a smile, "but I had noticed a slight equine fragrance."

"Just wait until you have ridden for days, I guarantee you would smell no better. Now be off with you, let me get myself sorted before I see my uncles. Have they all arrived?" I asked.

"Yes they are here," he replied from the doorway. "They seem to be accepting the situation a lot better than I expected them to."

"We come from a family of royalty, the unexpected is always expected. If an arrow will fall from the sky, it will hit a king in the eye, if a horse is to fall for lack of a shoe; it is a king's horse. Long life and happiness are not something that is common in my family."

"Maybe we can change that," William said as he left.

"For you maybe," I whispered after he had gone. "For you I will give everything, for with you my people have hope."

*****

I relaxed in the warm bath until my skin began to wrinkle, with some more hot water I would have stayed longer. However, as the water around me cooled, it reminded me I had things to do. Some clothes had been left out for me, courtesy of Gwinn I had to presume. Black trousers and a white shirt again, as Lizzie had been so fond of wearing had been left for me and I found a side effect of all the riding, my rear end was a lot more muscular than before I began riding around the land. They were damn near skin-tight. I risked a quick glance through the other clothes that Gwinn had accumulated for me while I had been away and quickly retreated. What had always been a minimal collection of clothes as a male had grown into enough clothes to outfit most of the women of the castle. Most worrying were a number of full formal outfits, Gwinn had plans for me, and they were plans that I didn't necessarily agree with.

I decided that the clothes would have to do; they were clean and didn't smell of horse and I had much to do. The first thing would have to be a conclave, my uncles, the Archdukes needed to be consulted; I needed their agreement for my plans. More than that though I needed their wisdom, they had many years of experience of warfare between them and many lifetimes of being 'The Family', they would understand my position.

"Henri!" I shouted as I walked towards the great hall, I knew he would not be far away.

"Your Highness," a voice answered from an indeterminate direction, "It is so good to see you back."

"Thank you, summon the Archdukes, I need to speak to them," I shouted back without trying to see where he was.

"Yes Your Majesty," Henri answered.

I looked around The Great Hall; at the throne, that my father said was one of the trappings of a king. I had realised something, as much as a throne was needed as the trappings of a king…because it was expected, a king was needed for The Kingdom. A line of succession had to be established and formalised with my Uncles, as the throne could not be allowed to come into contention.

The sound of many heavy footsteps behind me drew me away from my contemplation; I turned to find the seven Archdukes standing waiting for me.

"Come be seated please," I said almost desperately, I didn't need this deferential attitude from family. I took my place at the head of the long table, as it was obvious that they would not be seated before me and waited for them to arrange themselves.

"You all know what happened to me," I said taking charge of the situation, "Fredrick was there and by now I should be long dead. Because of Shakwell and his skills I am not…I am instead as you see me now."

"This has been explained to us," Fredrick said his voice sounding not totally convinced.

"Good," I continued, "I shall not go into long explanations then. I have called you here because any decisions I make now need to be endorsed by you, not just as a matter of duty, but because you believe it. Anything may be said here, it will go no further and will never be used against you and here I want your honest opinions."

I looked around at their faces, looking for agreement from them, in two cases awaiting agreement from them. When finally Fredrick nodded, I continued.

"The first thing that must be ratified is my position, I must have your agreement that I Cyrena am the same person as Clifford. I need my position, now that of Queen endorsed by this gathering…or else one of you to take on the role of King."

"I think that decision has been settled," Thomas said loudly, "we have already had this discussion. My brothers and the husbands of my sisters have decided that you are Clifford of Des Moines; you are my blood and child of my brother the king. You Cyrena are Queen of this kingdom and rule unopposed, with the full support of all of us."

"Was there any dissention?" I asked.

"I was not quick to believe," Fredrick said standing up, "I saw a brave king die…when he returns from the dead as a she I was suspicious. However since the time of your miraculous resurrection things have been happening, many things, I have no doubt that you are my blood and that you are the only person who could have done what has been done. I will fight alongside you."

"Thank you Uncle," I said appreciating his honesty, if he had no doubts I would have been suspicious. "We face a battle, a battle that is likely to cost lives and I have to recognise the fact that I may not return. In the past when a king has gone to war there have been a wife and an heir at home, if he fell there would be a king…now there is none. If I fall who should take my place?" There was silence for a moment or two, before Thomas spoke.

"If you fall on the field of battle, Fredrick shall take command of the army, at least for the battle. That was decided a long time ago, by your father."

"No, I know the battle will carry on with or without me," I said with an appreciative nod to Fredrick, "and he will do a better job of commanding than I can hope to do. After the battle is over, who is king?"

"I dislike this train of conversation, it has the feel of someone who is resigned to the inevitable. If you go into battle with this attitude we cannot hope to win," Fredrick said loudly.

"Hush Fredrick," Thomas said, "Cyrena is using her brains, thinking of The Kingdom and its future…you know doing the whole King thing, but as a Queen."

"Thank you Thomas," I said grateful for his support. "If I die, someone must take my place, someone must rule."

They began looking at each other, waiting for someone to say something. It was Thomas who broke the silence.

"Fredrick is the oldest," he said. "None of us will oppose him."

"BOLLOCKS!" Fredrick roared loudly, getting to his feet. "If you think I am leaving Berlin to come here and play at being nice to idiot lords, their idiot sons and ugly daughters you have another thing coming. George was good at all that type of thing, I never was and have no intention of trying."

"I have no intention of taking the job on, I have too many investments that must be overseen personally. Besides, Kim has spent twenty years organising our home as she wants it, I cannot face another twenty years of fussing," Thomas said.

"Forgetting Duty and Responsibility, does anyone here want the job," I asked. There was rapid shaking of heads.

"It is a responsibility that we have avoided." Fredrick said, "We are comfortable in our homes and too old to change our ways now. Should it become necessary, the throne will not remain empty, but I guarantee that there will be a few bumps and bruises in the rush to get away."

"I need to have a clear line of succession when I leave. The Kingdom cannot be without a ruler," I replied.

"You are too like your father," Thomas said with a smile. "Our new niece hasn't brought us here to ask our advice, she has brought us here to see if we agree with her solution. She is just testing the waters. Come on speak your mind, we may be older than you, but it is doubtful if we are wiser and above all else you are queen and our duty is to you."

"Thank you," I said irritated that Thomas had seen right through me, "what are your views of William, he who was Elisabeth, she that I was betrothed to?"

"The lad has a head on his shoulders," Thomas said and I could see my other uncles nodding in agreement, "however for the line of succession to be secure there is the formality of marriage."

"I know," I said with some bitterness in my voice.

"Marriage is not something to be undertaken just for duty, there will be many years of regrets if you go into this for the wrong reasons, love is the key to a long and happy marriage," Fredrick said surprising me with the tenderness in his voice. He must have seen my face for he spoke again. "Do not be surprised, I am a warrior yes, but that means I am a man of passion. Look at the Dwarves, warriors like no others, but they are getting tears in their drink as they sing songs about their women at home."

"A Prince Regent, yes…I can see that lad as a fitting consort for you…if there is love," Thomas said.

"Not as Regent, as King, equal in all matters and if I should fall then a King alone…with your assistance," I replied.

"That we can live with," Thomas said after looking around at my other Uncles, each of who nodded, "…and love?"

"I loved Elizabeth with all my heart, I love the person she is…as for William he is still her…" I replied hesitantly.

"If there was love there, then love will win through, no matter what difficulties are put in its path," Fredrick said loudly.

"Why Fred, I never realised how much of a romantic you were," Thomas said with a smile.

"Of course you didn't, you were too busy accumulating your personal fortune by the time you hit six years old. It took a woman like Kim to drag your attention back to the more important and diverting things in life," Fredrick replied, no matter how I tried I could never think of this huge man as anything less than Fredrick. Fred seemed too normal a name for a man like this.

"That decided then, there is a second matter one that Henri should be here for," I said to them. Thomas walked to the door and shouted Henri who appeared promptly.

"We have two problems to contend with, as well as a war against Silvinas…I believe I have declared war on the Elven nations," I told them. To use one of Yedda's favourite sayings…the shit then hit the fan.

*****

Three hours later I emerged from the Great Hall, feeling deflated. My motives were praised, but my Uncle Fredrick summed it up best, "A war on two fronts, were you taught nothing? What in hell were you thinking even contemplating actions like that at a time like this?"

The saving of The Drow was something they were proud of and they were impressed by my account of the escape from the forest and the willingness of Drow so recently enslaved, to fight.

"It is simple arithmetic Cyrena. A few Drow in our battle lines hardly makes up for the fact that our cities may be besieged by a second force while we are fighting for our lives," Thomas shouted.

"This is what has been done," I shouted loudly at the men. "This is not a discussion of intent, it is a fact, something that has happened and seeing what those bastards did to Melina, I would do it again without hesitation."

"Did it have to be done now?" Fredrick demanded.

"Yes," I said angrily. "They killed an old woman, then said that war would exist if we touched them…you of all people, Fredrick, would have reacted as Michael did."

I escaped from the arguments pleading hunger; it was an honest excuse, as I had not eaten since our return. The discussions had changed from a matter of attributing blame, to methods of defending their cites against and invasion by the Elves. Despite the initial anger I knew in my heart that any one of them would have reacted in the same way. They would have had to vindicate their actions in front of the others too, which was what I was rather inexperienced at. I felt insecure disagreeing with my uncles, so much older, so much more experienced than I.

I made my way to the kitchen again, a place I knew I was safe under the protective regime of Gwinn.

"Well I can see you aren't that glad to be back," Gwinn said as I entered. "Does that mean you have seen Lizzie, or rather William?"

"Oh no its not that," I assured her. "It seems I have made a mistake in helping to free the Drow."

"A mistake how?" she asked indicating I should sit down.

"I should have dealt with Silvinas before opening up the potential of a war on another front."

"Was that what your father taught you, to do nothing when something needed doing?" Gwinn asked.

"No," I said.

"Exactly," she said like she had won the argument; seeing my confusion she continued. "The Archdukes, they are all good men, but their responsibility is to their cities and their lands, no further. Your responsibilities are greater, if it should be necessary for Berlin to fall so The Kingdom will be saved, you will do it as necessary."

"I don't think I did it for The Kingdom or for any greater purpose…just because I felt it was necessary," I admitted.

"Was it the right thing to do, did those people deserve help?" Gwinn asked.

"Its not that simple," I protested.

"It is to The Dwarves, it is to The Drow, that is what brought them here to fight for you. Your deeds and the deeds of those before you have given this kingdom a reputation for doing the right thing. You do what is right without question, so they come to our aid without question," she said placing a plate of cheeses and meats in front of me. "Help yourself to bread and eat your fill. I want to hear no more until you have eaten."

I did as I was told.

*****

After my meal I was starting to find out why my father spent so much time in his quarters. As prince I could walk around the castle virtually unnoticed, now it seemed that everyone within the castle wanted just a few words with me. Most of it was meaningless to me, things that should have been dealt with by Gwinn, Henri or James, but they all felt I was the person to deal with their problems personally. I made my way rapidly to the library and found William there with the books I had requisitioned from The University.

"Have you looked at these?" he demanded as I entered.

"Not yet," I admitted.

"This isn't just military information, this is the history of a world that was lost," William said, his eyes bright with excitement.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"There was a time when the world was in fear, not of the dark hoards, but of man and his abilities, they could destroy cities with one missile as they called them…"

"Do they have instructions on how to make these missiles?" I asked.

"No, the skills are long gone. Lots of it is useful, but the history is priceless," he said.

"At the moment the history is of minimal interest to me, I need things I can use, tactics, weapons or magic that can help us in this struggle," I said firmly and his blue eyes fixed themselves on me.

"Leave them with me, I can get through them faster than you and figure out what is of any use to you," he replied gently.

"Thank you," I said and sat down opposite him, his eyes never left me.

"What else is on your mind?" he asked.

"Lots of things," I admitted.

"Come off it, I might not have been William for very long, but I wasn't born yesterday. I have known you long enough to know when something is bothering you, something you want to talk about," his hand sneaked across the table and his fingertips touched mine. "Things might be a little different now, but we still care for each other, don't we?"

"Yes," I admitted, letting my fingers trace the length of his. "That is part of what I want to talk to you about, how much do you care?" I asked.

"I was willing to risk my life on Shakwell's magic for you," he said, "because I couldn't bear to live without you. I knew if I committed myself to the path, he could not and would not let me die."

"Will you still marry me?" I asked my throat almost refusing to work and my mouth dry.

"Do you mean it?" William asked standing up and coming around the table to me.

"Yes," I whispered.

He pulled me to my feet and engulfed me in his arms, holding me tight to him, crushing my breasts against his body. I could feel him kissing my hair and I was suddenly very glad I had washed it. For a moment or two I felt self conscious, inhibited by a lifetime of conditioning, then I gradually became aware of the masculinity of this man who was so awkward in his new body. He smelt different to me, a clean musky smell, a pleasant smell and I was enjoying it. When it became obvious he was enjoying it too, by the object pressing into my belly I gently backed off.

"Sorry," he said blushing, uncomfortable with this reaction.

"Don't be," I said standing on tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek and giving him a little smile. "I didn't find it too objectionable."

"I think the magic did more than change our bodies, it changed our minds too," he said.

"I don't think so, I think that we react naturally in the manner appropriate for whatever form we are in. If it has four legs and looks like a cat, it will act like a cat," I said.

"And if it is a beautiful young woman?" William asked.

"She will be flattered by such a reaction, but also a little bit scared…this is a new world for me," I said quietly.

He wrapped his arms around me again, engulfing my diminutive frame in what seemed like his immensity. His lips found mine and his tongue began to try to explore my mouth, I accepted the invasion willingly as his hands caressed my rear. I was getting quite hot and flustered by his attention, I wanted more.

"Come on, I need to know what is in those books that I can use," I said breaking away from his kiss. "Duty and responsibility come first…fun later."

"Yes," he agreed reluctantly, "I suppose so…"

"I will see you later, I have things I must do," I told him and gave him a last kiss before I left.

*****

"Yedda, when you changed were you surprised by how natural and how good things felt?" I asked quietly as I sat leaning against her bulk as she caught the last rays of the sinking sun on the courtyard.

"Come on spill it," she said turning her head to look closely at me.

"William, he kissed me and I didn't stop him. In fact I quite liked it…" I said hesitantly.

"Go with the flow Hon, at the end of the day you are a hormonally driven young woman, if it wasn't William that caught your eye it would have been Tara," she replied.

"Tara is a friend," I said slightly shocked at the suggestion, "I never would."

"That's what I mean, you shared a tent with her, saw her body and everything, yet you show as little interest sexually in her as I would. You are a girl, embrace that and enjoy it with no guilt, it is what you are," she said resting her head by my side. I reached up and rubbed just above her eye with the heel of my hand, her eye closed appreciatively.

"Its scares me a little," I admitted.

"It will, that is life for you," she said as she began to move her head so I could get all of the itchy spots. "The fear is part of being alive, nothing to do with being female, its just that things are just that little more messed up for you than for most kids."

"I have asked William to marry me," I told her, her head suddenly jerked upright away from my hand.

"No, back up a moment Cyrena, I said there was nothing up with enjoying your new sexuality, but this is taking it to extremes," she said loudly.

"It is necessary, a kingdom needs a king. You did not know Elizabeth before, she will make a good king," I said hoping she would keep her voice down.

"Yet again," she shouted drawing some attention our way. "Do you do nothing in your life for you?"

"I have responsibilities," I replied.

"Don't give me that shit," she snapped. "I have had responsibilities, who do you think was the one that broke the power of the magicians over the dragons? What do you think I did when I freed The Drow, just left them? I have had responsibilities, I have had duties that had to be done, but my life is and always will be mine."

"Maybe that is where we differ most, my life has never been mine…even when I chose to end it I had to do it in secret," I replied.

"They ask too much of you," Yedda said her head again dropping alongside me, "don't let them destroy you. You have something special inside you, something that is needed for this time, but more importantly something that will be needed after all this shit has finished."

"I was something that was created for this time, something created by my father and something that was created by magic. After all this is finished, after Silvinas is gone what place in the world will there be for something created by magic?" I asked.

"There will always be a place in the world for a little magic, it is what makes the world special and people such as you will always be needed," she replied. We sat there for a long time, enjoying the company we provided each other while the world continued on around us. No one dared intrude, no one dared demand anything and for a while at least, I relaxed.

"It is easier on the battlefield," I said after a while and Yedda just looked at me. "In battle I don't have to think about consequences all the time, I just act and do what is right. Outside the battle I have to consider everything I do and say…people seem intent on hampering everything I do."

"Welcome to the world of politics and don't trust any of the bastards, you are the only protection that your people have from democracy," she said.

"Democracy?" I said hesitant with the strange word.

"Tis a silly game where lots of people without any idea of what they are doing get a chance to run things. They never represent everyone and if they mess it up they never face the consequences, just fade into obscurity."

"How could it work?" I asked and Yedda just grumbled loudly.

*****

The castle and the city was a hive of activity. Training and integration of the Dwarves and Drow into our own forces was my priority. Both were formidable warriors but both were unused to fighting with allies. The Drow were devastating with their long bows and a small group of Dwarves could take an objective that would cost many men. We needed to know how to use these skills to the full. Other people's priorities seemed to differ from our immediate problems, every minor lord was intent on putting his problems to me and the women seemed to have lost all sense of proportion in relation to my forthcoming wedding. I was expecting a simple civil affair, a few people there as witnesses and it would be over…they seemed to be planning a full state occasion. Lizzie, rather William now, was preoccupied too, deep in the study of the books I had stolen from The University. For a while the women did try to involve me in the preparations for the wedding, that was until I suggested wearing trousers and armour, it had the desired effect; besides standing still occasionally while Gwinn measured me I had nothing to do with it.

We had seven days to make all preparations, we had seven days to formulate our battle plan and I had six days before I was to be a married woman. To be quite honest the thought of the forthcoming battles scared me least.

*****

"We have to choose our ground carefully," I said to the assembly before me. It was a strange war conference, led by a woman and held outside so Yedda could participate too.

"We face a foe that outnumbers us and is willing to use magic. We need a place that we can hold against whatever is thrown against us, then when we have hurt him, Silvinas will have to turn his full attention to us," I told them.

"Why face two battles," William asked, "would it not be easier to engage the main force directly?"

"Their forces are too spread out, they cover a wide arc and we cannot guarantee Silvinas will be present where we attack," James replied. "We need to get his attention, to hurt him badly enough that he will take personal control of the battle."

"What proof have we that the battle is won if we kill him?" Michael asked.

"None," Shakwell said loudly, "and that task is beyond you Horsemaster. Cyrena, myself and possibly Yedda will deal with Silvinas and even then I cannot guarantee he will die. The best I can hope for is that I can exile him into some other realm; somewhere it will take him many years to escape from. He created this world and his death might just be the unmaking of it."

"Can he be killed?" I asked willing to take the chance.

"Possibly…" was Shakwell's reply.

"That we will deal with when we get there," I said trying to break the gloom that was threatening to overshadow the proceedings. "We need a place to defend and then we need a place to fight. It has to look like it is his army that we are trying to defeat rather than the man, otherwise he will be holed up in whatever place he uses for the time he is not here."

"The river past Berlin," Yedda said looking at the map on the floor. "I know that ground well and if too much hasn't changed over the years there is a place that is defendable, though you will have to hold a mile long front. It has cliffs running for miles either side and only one place that can be crossed."

"I know the place," Fredrick said nodding his head. "It is a good place, that I have used before to good effect. The one problem will be drawing them in, bringing them to that point."

"A small force of cavalry, making harrying attacks on the flanks of the main force. If we can keep them moving and get them more and more angry then eventually they will send a large force out to deal with us," Michael suggested.

"How many is a small force?" I asked.

"Two and a half thousand, perhaps three…" he answered and I gasped as Thomas whistled through his teeth.

"Look at the numbers out there," Michael said defensively. "We could be talking forty thousand horse out there by the time we come to move. I am after less than one in ten. If you take into account the infantry as well…"

"You are after one in ten?" I said concerned about sending my friend out into such danger.

"No," Thomas said, "we are after one in ten. I am more use on a horse than Fredrick here and I can at least provide my own presence, showing the men that we are with them."

"Archduke…" Michael began and I could see his face was unsure about what he was going to say.

"Do not worry Michael, this will be your force, I am just there too," Thomas said and I could see Michael relax slightly.

"We fortify here then at the River Plate and Michael brings them onto us. Where do we fight the final battle?" James asked.

"My eyes are not as good as they once were and whoever penned this map did not have a good hand," Shakwell said. "What is that name there?"

"Waterloo," I replied guiltily, after a moment's hesitation; I had penned this map. There was a loud snort from Yedda in response to this.

"River Plate, Waterloo…it's all someone's idea of a frigging game," she shouted loudly.

"The world was created out of the mind of Silvinas," Shakwell said raising a hand to calm her. "There are gods here, I have little doubt of that…but I don't think they have always been gods. I think they are souls as lost as you and I old friend."

"Do you think they are still sane?" Yedda asked him.

"Can a god be mad…or can one who knows all and is all powerful be sane?" Shakwell asked. " I don't know…they are higher powers than us and I just have to hope that their intellect is greater than their imagination."

"Waterloo and the River Plate…and we are going to have battles there. What can they throw at us next…The Holocaust…Hiroshima? These are the sort of bastards who inspire cults, next thing they will have people killing heathens or committing suicide to go and join the alien spaceship," Yedda snapped back at him.

"What is up with the River Plate?" I asked. "There is a Saucer Hill, Cup Lake and many other similar names in the area. I know it is not exactly imaginative, but they were potters who settled there, not geographers."

"Oh yes?" Yedda said derisorily, "and Waterloo?"

"I would have thought that was obvious," I replied. "The lake to the north is the headwater for the River Loo, not exactly a great river but as with the River Plate it feeds into The Nile."

"Kid when we are done with this you have to become an atheist and ban all religions, it was bad enough to have a god who no one could prove existed. It isn't safe to have gods who take a direct interest in the world around them. You never know without anyone believing in them they might just BUGGER OFF," Yedda said shouting the last words at the sky.

"Yedda don't confuse them at this time," Shakwell said gently. "There is time for Cyrena to seize her own destiny after all this is finished."

"Will she have a future?" Yedda demanded. "Can you guarantee that, can you tell me this poor kid is going to come through this alive?"

"If I can, even if it costs me my life, I will make sure she is safe," Shakwell said.

"I will hold you to that," Yedda said firmly. "I have never asked anything of you, not in all the years we have known each other, but I will hold you to that. This game is just too fucked up, people are going to die and it better not be her."

"I cannot promise, but I will do all that I can," Shakwell said and Yedda seemed satisfied.

"We have our ground, Fredrick can you see what information you can get on both places. We have four days till we move, now we just need to be ready," I said.

"We will be ready…for the battle and the celebration of your marriage," Thurn said loudly.

"Thank you for reminding me of that," I said wishing I didn't have to be so diplomatic. Some of Yedda's comments would have been quite appropriate at that time.

*****

"Come on sleepy head, we have a lot to do today," woke me up from dreams of fantastical weapons all of no use to me at this time. I looked up to see Tara standing there.

"Yes, I have," I agreed happily. "Too much to do. We march out tomorrow and I am damn sure that Clive is making the merchants hold back, as for weapons…"

"Slow down," Tara said sitting on the edge of the bed. "There is something a lot more important happening today…you get married remember?"

"Don't remind me," I said dismissively. "We have hours before that happens and lots of things that I need to do."

"Too right you have lots of things you need to do, first of all is breakfast and it's formal."

"Wait a minute," I protested, "breakfast with other people I can just about cope with, but formal? I can just slip on some clothes and say hello."

"No, you will get dressed, smile sweetly and act the proper lady," Tara said firmly.

"Oh will I?" I said daring her to defy me.

"Yes, because Gwinn says you will," she replied and I knew that I was in for a long day.

Breakfast was as formal as one of my father's events and I was the centre of attention for all. The Archdukes took tables as did William, and I seemed to be surrounded by people who had no interest in the war at all. No one could deny Millandra and Thurn's presence at the table was correct, though I could see some of the nobles who had not been included at my table questioned Tara's presence. I could see that she was about as comfortable with the situation as I was and reached across to touch her hand, she smiled appreciatively.

"Will your new husband approve of friendships with ladies of The University?" one female, I hesitate to call a lady, asked suggestively.

"The Lady Tara and I are comrades in blood, we have faced the dangers together and that is one bond that my forthcoming marriage cannot touch," I replied.

"Yes well, I feel that a 'lady' should not be associated with such things, battle is something for men to deal with," she countered.

"Perhaps you would not feel so if the dark forces were at your gate?" Millandra threw at her; I could see tensions building with those I called my friends at this table.

"Oh no, a lady is a lady at all times, just because of danger one does not change, it is something that is bred into a girl and encouraged until she reaches womanhood," the woman said.

"Where as you have but one honour, your title from birth or marriage, " Thurn said waving a fork loaded with a large sausage at her to annunciate each word. "The Lady Tara here is thrice honoured, for her deeds. She is a Lady amongst the Kingdom of men, the Kingdom of Dwarves and those dispossessed people The Drow. I know of only one other person held in such esteem and she sits at the head of this table." Thurn finished with a bow of his head to me and then to Tara, before continuing to demolish his sausage.

"What did you do to gain such favour?" the woman asked Tara.

"Nothing," Tara mumbled back.

"The Lady Tara fought to save lives, attending the wounded as the battle raged around her. Never once did she think of her own safety and never once did she flinch in her duty," Millandra replied loud enough for most of the Great Hall to hear. Silence descended as people tried to listen in on the conversation at the high table.

"What of our queen, how did she distinguish herself then?" the woman asked.

"Ah well," Thurn jumped in before Millandra could answer. "She is one Lady that I would not like to be on the wrong side of, not without a large number of my lads. Irritate her and she makes a cave troll seem like good company."

"Forgive me Your Highness," the lady apologised to me before turning back to Thurn, "but she doesn't look like she has it in her. She is so sweet."

"Don't let that appearance fool you," Thurn said his knife being used to help him express his feelings. "My wife is a sweet little thing, but you wouldn't catch me getting on the wrong side of her. That lad William is a braver man than I, by far."

I concentrated on my food for a moment or two while trying to remember the woman's name or even where she hailed from. Usually I had long coaching sessions off Henri before I faced one of these occasions; today all I had was a list of names recited to me.

"You hail from Luton, Lady Francesca?" I asked hoping I had identified her correctly.

"Not originally, but now it is my home," she admitted. "Where does your intended hail from, I thought I knew all royalty by sight?"

"Scunthorpe," I replied "and William, like myself, is a creature forged in the magic of Shakwell."

"Scunthorpe," she replied her disgust obvious. "An uncivilised place at best, and if I am not very mistaken a territory in dispute at this time, after the exile of its lord."

"Very astute of you Lady Francesca, however as you know it is the deeds of the individual that count rather than a family," I countered.

"Surely if there was no hint of scandal William would be marrying you as the Marquis of Scunthorpe?" this woman was irritating me now.

"William relinquished his title on our betrothal," I replied. "A king must never favour one people above another, therefore no other rank is needed or desired."

"Surely you mean Prince Regent, your consort?" she countered quickly.

"No Lady Francesca, as Queen I say what I mean," I said.

"And what she says is law," Thurn added banging his fist on the table loudly. "William will be a King and one like no other, for at his side he has a queen unlike any before her."

Silence again descended on my table, though I could hear whispers from other tables at this unofficial announcement of William's new status. I could also see those who debated the finer points of law discussing the legalities of my actions for many years. However, as my father always said, 'if a law is wrong then never hesitate to change it' and I would ensure William's status was unchallenged. When it came to the time that William was needed it would be my uncles who guaranteed his position, it would be up to them above and beyond what was said in the word of the law. With their backing his position would be secure. If they decided he was unfit at any point in the future it would be a different matter, though with their guidance that should never happen.

I tried to concentrate on my food for a moment or two, to allow my thoughts to coalesce. I had too many other things I should be doing at this time; none of them included pandering to dim-witted females. Most of what we had learned from Malick's hidden texts was useless at this point in time. The theory of explosives I thought might have potential…except it didn't work. Saltpetre, charcoal and sulphur should explode in a manner to rival magic…yet they sat there and smouldered, making nothing but a foul smell. James, Michael and Thurn were finding some of the tactics interesting, but beyond that I had aggravated the university for nothing. Much of what had been in the books was already to be found, in the designs of the older cities. Cities that were defensible, cities that would cost many lives to breach the walls and even more lives once they were inside. I could not allow the battle to reach the cities though; too many of my people would be lost facing the foe that was against us if they ever reached the cities. Not all were like this female, many like Kim would die on their feet, most would die making sure that the price of their death was damn high.

"You are rather quiet for the morning of your wedding," Lady Francesca said loudly dragging me back to the present situation.

"Yes, I have much on my mind," I admitted, "and much that I should be doing at this time."

"There is always much to do for a wedding," Lady Francesca agreed, probably the worst comment that she could have made to me.

"I realise that it is of minor interest to you, but have you looked at the force massed outside this city?" I asked her.

"Yes," yes she said, her cheeks filling with colour.

"There are many more important things going on in the world than a wedding, do you think the Archdukes leave their cities at this time for just a wedding? Do you know what they risked making their way here, do you know what they leave behind…do you know what they may lose answering this call?"

"Well we all have left our homes to answer this call," Lady Francesca protested.

"You may have left your homes, but you did not leave homes soon to be under siege again, stripping men from the defences to bring here. That is why we work at such a pace, should Silvinas turn his attention back to Berlin there is nothing to stop him," I pushed my plate away from me, my appetite having completely deserted me. I looked around the hall; this was a spectacle for the benefit of those minor nobles who found such things important. This was not the time for such sideshows.

I stood up, nodded to those at my table and walked out, I could hear behind me the rapid movement of chairs as others took my lead.

"Cyrena, what is the meaning of such rudeness?" I turned to see Thomas following me rapidly, a look of anger on his face.

"This is not a time for polite conversation, this is not a time to make pleasantries with Ladies. Tomorrow we march to war, possibly to our deaths and I do not intend to spend today in inane conversation," I told him. He actually hesitated a second, surprised at my reaction. "I want to know how we stand with weapons, I want to know how we fare with supplies, I want to know how many men we can field and I want some proper clothes…not these damn things."

"Cyrena…" Thomas said and hesitated again.

"No Thomas, enough is enough. Tonight they can celebrate and socialise before we march in the morn, but this time is needed to prepare."

"Yes Your Highness," he replied and bowed, the first time any of my uncles had bowed to me. I looked into his eyes trying to find a hint of mockery there; his eyes firmly found mine and I could see there was none.

"Let's get this show on the road," Thomas turned and roared to those who were following. "Time is short, we want inspections of all men, weapons must be checked and I want Clive of the merchants here now….what are we waiting for people we have a war to be won…or should we just wait for the next one?"

Thomas's orders could be heard echoing along the corridors as I made my way to my quarters, ignoring those few people I passed on the way. Inside I was alone, something that I cherished so much now. For a moment or two I fumbled with the hooks and buttons of the dress that I wore, eventually though I was able to let it slip to the floor. The corset took slightly longer and at one point I almost took a knife to the stupid garment, once freed though I hesitated a moment to scratch. These clothes were worse than armour.

I looked around at the choices of clothes that I had, most were Gwinn's doing and they were things of no practical use at all. Trousers, boots, a shirt, a leather jerkin and the plate mail had me feeling more human. As I buckled on my sword and the dirk that had saved my life once already I knew I was right. In the finery I was out of place, something that I was not and was never meant to be. A pretty queen who was a lady was something that wasn't needed now.

Cyrena though, however much I disliked the new me, was necessary and I doubted that Clifford would have made the same impression on so many different people.

Outside my room, Drurn and Eferu took their places behind me, a concession that I made on condition that I did not have all of my would be protectors following me all the time. This was my home, this was my kingdom and this was my time…I would be what was needed and I would do it my way.

"Henri!" I shouted loud enough to match Michael at his loudest. "I want Clive of the merchants here to confirm the supply columns."

I did not wait for a response, Henri, wherever he was would have heard and would do it. I headed for the courtyard to meet my uncles, the officers and the many thousands of men that had answered my call, for they were far more worthy of my time than any Lady from Luton.

  (continued)

  

  

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