The Dressmaker’s Model                   by: Alyssa Davis

 

At last! Summer vacation...At 16 years old, I'm finally working on my first real job earning my own money. OK, so I'm only working for my aunt who owns a small dressmaker shop. But, it is a full time job, for the summer, and I'll probably continue part-time after that. I had spent a lot of time here playing when I was younger; now she's given me the opportunity of earning some spending money. Being a close family friend, rather like a real aunt to me, she's taken care of me since I was born...she said I was so tiny I could fit into a shoe box. I've always been small and kind of frail, guess I always will be.

 

I had just finished sweeping the floor of her workroom and, using a magnet, picked the pins out of the debris. Sitting at her kitchen table, (she lives behind the work area) I was loading pin cushions with the pins I had salvaged when I heard Aunt Evie’s voice talking angrily in the workroom.

"This darn old thing! Of all times..."

I peeked around the corner and saw her standing over the dress form. The center pole was broken off from the weighted base, and there was no way to keep it upright.

"Oh, Al dear, I’m sorry if you heard my outburst, but I'm having a terrible problem with this dress form. It broke on me again, and I don’t think it can be repaired. On top of that, I have four bridesmaids dresses to hem before Saturday, and even if I order a new form it’ll take a month to come. I'll never get these dresses finished in time."

She looked over at me standing in the doorway with my hand on one hip. A smile came over her face as the idea struck her,

" Could I talk you into being my dress model for a while? All you’d have to do is stand here, and with you turning, I wouldn't have to move around and I could be finished in no time."

She stood smiling expectantly, the broken dress form lying like a corpse between us. Me? In a dress? The mere thought of it sent a shiver down my spine. How could she know? For as long as I can remember I’d had thoughts of what it would be like to be a girl, to dress in these garments of wondrous fabrics and styles. Shame at such thoughts that had come to me as I’d run my fingers over the sleek satin and lace revisited me now. Goose bumps raised the hackles of my neck as I tried to be casual about this wondrous opportunity.

"I'd like to help you Auntie, but what if someone comes in and sees me, a boy in a dress?"

She stood in thought for a moment and then brightened,

"Oh, I don't think that's much of a problem, with your long curly hair, in a dress, you'll look like a real girl. Nobody will recognize you or pay attention to you. They’ll just think you’re a girl that works here."

She forged ahead rather than give me a chance to back out.

" It sure would be a big help for me if I'm going to meet my deadline. The form is broken there’s little time to get it repaired."

My answer came slowly, as if she had convinced me,

"OK," I said in a hesitant voice, "let's do it, this should be a laugh!"

I dutifully followed Evie back into the back area of her shop where the dresses were neatly hung on hangers. Four beautiful gowns in a dusty rose color. She had me strip to my jockey shorts. It felt strange as we pulled the first one down over my head, my uplifted arms inserted into the sleeves. It slid down my body easily and fit perfectly. It was odd, but I knew that I liked it already. She zipped up the back of the dress and we both looked at it in the mirror. The bust area of the dress was empty and looked silly, even to me.

She brushed my naturally curly hair up and back into a reasonably feminine hairstyle, bringing a few strands down over my forehead....Amazing, I thought, as she had completely changed my appearance with a few strokes of a hairbrush. Watching in the mirror, I realized that I looked exactly like my sister! In fact, Aunt Evie said the same thing as if reading my mind.

"Al, you look like you're a twin to your sister in that dress and hairstyle."

My sister is older but we're the same physical size, both small.

In the fitting room, Evie had me stand on a box-like dais in the center of the room, the mirrored walls reflecting my new image while she sat on the floor and began to take measurements, setting the hem line, and placing pins as I turned. I could see this girl in the long dress looking back at me from every angle, the re-styled hair and feminine dress creating a fetching creature that called out to me. I felt something happen within me...a change... a thrill...an exciting sensation.. The feel of the dress brushing against my bare legs was new and different, the tightness of the gown’s bodice on my chest reminding me that I was under her control.

"Aren't the ladies going to be wearing high heels?" I asked.

"Yes, of course, why?"

"Won’t that affect the length of the skirt? I know that that’s a question they ask when I get my pants tailored...what kind of shoes will I be wearing? I noticed that you're measuring from the floor with me in my socks. When they wear heels, the skirt could be too short, right?"

Her face lit up in amazement.

"That's an excellent point. How clever of you to notice. I'd better call and ask what size heels they’ll be wearing"

While Evie was making the call, I twirled and danced around in the pretty gown, admiring myself in the mirrors, striking various poses as I had seen models do on TV. I was unaware that she was watching me from another room while talking on the phone. She returned with several boxes of shoes.

"You were right. They want the skirt shortened to take into account the heels they will be wearing. They also reminded me that I have the shoes here…they had me send them out to be dyed to match the dresses. I hope we can find a pair that fits you."

With an outward casualness that didn’t match my feeling inside, I began to try them on. A flash of fear spread through me as I worried that they may all be the wrong size for me. For some reason now I desperately wanted to see how high heeled shoes would feel and look on me. Fortunately the last pair just barely fit once I had taken off my heavy socks. Evie handed me a pair of nylon stockings.

"Here, you need these. We can’t have you wearing their shoes in your bare feet."

Without thinking, I easily rolled the hose into a little donut and hooked it over my toes, working it over my foot and unrolled it up my leg. At the top I folded it over so it would stay in place. I had seen my mother do this very often, and never thought about what I was doing. After the second stocking was in place Evie smiled at me. She was impressed.

Thoughts ran through her head, ‘You never cease to amaze me, Al....Your awareness of women's fashions caught my mistake with the hem measurements, and you put on stockings like an experienced woman. I wonder what other surprises you have for me? Have you ever done this before? You haven't been wearing your sister's clothes have you?’...But she remained silent, keeping it all inside her ...she was beginning to surmise....

I finished with the stockings and slipped the shoes on. I had to be careful with the added height of the heels, lifting the front of the long gown up so I wouldn’t trip. I took several turns around the shop but within minutes I seemed to have gotten the hang of it and moved back up onto the pinning area. As I looked at her we both smiled, but said nothing. I was happy, and she wasn’t surprised.

We returned to the measurements, this time with me looking more regal in my bridesmaid gown. The stockings and high heeled shoes gave me a feeling I can’t describe; all I know is that I felt more comfortable this way, my excitement internal, a buzz that wouldn’t go away...it was neat!. I couldn’t tell Evie, but in helping her I was really enjoying myself; secretly, I think she knew.

When the first dress was complete, Evie unzipped the back and I tried to remove it, but in the warmth of the rear of the shop I had gotten a bit sweaty, and my damp skin made it very difficult to slide off. With extreme care, and the effort of both of us, we got it off. She hung it up on it’s hanger again, shaking her head,

"It’s kind of warm today, I'd like you to wear a slip so we don’t ruin these dresses with perspiration. We almost tore that dress."

Evie went into her apartment and came back with a full cotton slip with wide lace straps and lace trim.

"Here..." she said, handing it to me.

I put it on without objection, actually delighted at this addition. But this too, had a noticeably empty bodice. I almost said something but then Evie approached with the second dress and it was back up the stand again for me. I stood in my feminine finery, holding my posture and poses as I knew a young girl would do. The girl in the glass looked back at me and smiled. I smiled back at her all afternoon. We finished all four gowns by the end of the day. All marked and pinned, ready for sewing.

"Al dear, I cant tell you how much I appreciated your help. And you've been such a good sport about it...not many boys would have been so helpful and agreeable to do what you did."

Having lost my shyness, I stood there in the slip, stockings, and high heels as if it were the most normal thing in the world for me. Deep down I knew I was comfortable this way.

"That's OK, Auntie. It was actually kind of fun. I’d always wondered how I'd look if I was a girl, and now I know."

I twirled on my toes before her,

"and I’m not half bad. Do you want me to model any more dresses? It seems to make your work easier and I kinda enjoy doing it." There! I finally admitted it.

Confirmation of her suspicions echoed in her head, ‘Yes, I really think you do, my little girl.’ Her smile gave nothing of her thoughts away,

"As a matter of fact, there are several outfits you can help me with. If you don’t mind, I’d prefer to use you rather than a dressmaker's form, and " she paused, "Maybe I can even ask you to model some finished outfits from time to time. The clothes show off better if someone is wearing them, and I certainly can’t get into these styles anymore."

She looked me over, the form fitting slip displaying my slim build, hiding nothing.

"You, however, have a slender, model’s figure and will look great. Would you mind?"

My heart was in my throat, the thought of wearing these exotic women’s garments again was something I would kill for. Yet, I'm not sure why. A shoulder shrug for casualness, then:

"Sure...anything to help you, Auntie."

The next day, I approached the shop with rapt anticipation. What would happen? Would Evie dress me up as she had yesterday? The feeling came back to me as strong as if I were still wearing them. I needed their touch, the feeling of constraint, the gentle swish of skirts about my legs, the regal height of the high heeled shoes. I opened the door and started in.

"Al...? Come on back. I’ve got those outfits ready for us to work on."

As promised, Evie had it all ready for me. I had to hide my excitement as I quickly changed out of my clothes and into another slip, but one with even more lace, a garter belt, stockings, and a pair of her high heeled shoes. I put them all on without hesitation or her direction. She smiled approvingly when she came back and I was all dressed...dressed as a girl, that is. Most of the day, between phone calls and customers, I put on skirts which she marked and fitted for alterations. The silky blouse she had me wear as a top was soft and slippery against my skin. I remained that way all day long. Even people popping in to drop off things and such didn’t bother me. They seemed to accept me as a female employee of the shop. In fact, people seeing me in the skirt and blouse gave no indication of anything unusual, and some actually complimented me. I appeared to be just another girl being fitted for a new outfit...a girl being fitted. I liked the idea.

We seemed to fall into a routine, each day dressing me in my now familiar working outfit of full slip, stockings, and heels, and then progressing through the almost never ending pile of garments to be hemmed and fitted. Even after we had finished , sometimes early in the day, I would continue to effect my role of a girl. I was in no hurry to change. After a week of modeling skirts and dresses, I was pretty well adjusted to putting them on and taking them off without assistance from Evie. She noticed how at ease I was while wearing them. I could tell she was impressed while watching my feminine mannerisms as I would smooth my skirt when sitting down, knees together, and cross my legs. I found myself doing it almost instinctively. Wearing these clothes in such a feminine environment made me want to act like a lady...I felt like I belonged in them. I was all mixed up...why did I, a boy, enjoy wearing girl's clothes? I probably should have been embarrassed, but instead, I felt so natural, so content.

Monday morning of the third week, entering her apartment as usual, I found a surprise. Along with the usual lace trimmed slip, there was a new pair of panties, a garter belt, and a matching bra with padded inserts. Next to them was a shoe box with a cellophane package on top containing a new pair of white stockings. I opened the shoe box and held my breath. Black patent leather pumps with two inch heels glistened in the morning light.

Evie said nothing, but I felt for sure she was testing me. I stood there for a while, and finally the voice inside me broke through. This is what I really wanted. I wanted to feel the silky fabrics against my skin and the precarious tilt of the high heels. I couldn’t disappoint her (or myself), so I eagerly exchanged my cotton jockey shorts for the panties and hose, bra, (I had no problem putting on the bra, either) slip, and shoes and with a confidence born of my weeks in them, joined Evie in the workroom, ready for duty.

She watched me come in and pause to proudly show off for her. Now the bodice of my slip was full with the simulated breasts of the padded bra. The form fitting slip showed my narrow shoulders, slim waist, and broad hips. It’s shortness also showed off the shapeliness of my stocking clad and curvy legs, and pantylines! A girl's figure was reflected back at me from the mirror! No wonder I felt so confident wearing women's clothes.

"I see you found my gift, dear. Just a token of my appreciation. I thought you'd enjoy having some of your own things. I felt it's what you wanted."

Tears came to my eyes as I realized how well Evie knew me, perhaps better than I knew myself. I had hidden nothing from her, and instead of being upset with me she was actually validating this new lifestyle.

"Oh thank you, Auntie. Yes, this is wonderful." I paused and looked into her eyes, " you knew that I was enjoying myself, didn’t you? That I like wearing this stuff."

Her smile brightened the room as she came close and gave me a motherly hug,

"Yes, I've noticed for a while that you've taken to it...it really makes you happy and I actually like seeing you dressed that way. I’ve always thought that you’d make a better looking girl than a boy. You have such feminine features, you should have been a girl. You're too pretty to be boy. In fact, your mother always said she wanted another girl. Oh, and there's something else."

She reached behind her to bring out a dress on a hanger.

"I made you a dress in my spare time. Here, try this on. It's all yours, along with the lingerie you're wearing. You've earned it."

She handed me a floral printed dress with short sleeves, a straight skirt, and back zipper. She helped me to immediately put it on, and naturally found it to be a perfect fit. When Evie zipped it up, the front formed around my padded breasts proudly. I loved my new look and I now especially loved the feel of wearing my own girl’s clothes. While Evie was taking a phone call, I sat at her dressing table and looked over the array of cosmetics that covered the surface. I contemplated applying some of her lipstick to my lips and a little blush to my cheeks, but hesitated. I brushed my hair a bit for a little touch up. When Evie returned and saw me, she was still smiling and pleased with my look.

"Might I suggest a little makeup for you? We can make you into a lovely young lady if you want, OK?"

My hesitation was nonexistent as I turned to the mirror and smiled. Sitting beside me she walked me through each item, explaining its purpose and the best way to apply it. Within minutes she had darkened my lashes with mascara, accented my eyes with eyeliner, made my cheeks glow with blusher, and arched my eyebrows into more of a thin arch. The lipstick she let me put on by myself.

I loved the smell and taste of it and kept licking it with the tip of my tongue.

"Better watch that in public, " she admonished, "it looks kind of sexy and you might start attracting boys. Let's close up and go have lunch, my treat. I want to show you off to some friends."

"Outside? You mean go out? Auntie, no! I don’t think I can do that. I can’t go out on the street like this! What if someone finds out I'm a boy. I'll die of embarrassment."

She looked at me sternly,

"Hush! Has anyone noticed in the last couple weeks? NO! Besides, no one will ever know because you're not really a boy, you're a girl! You're beautiful and you've gotten so feminine, you could fool anybody. Be confident, be the person you want to be!"

She gave me the moral boost I needed. I did feel good about how I looked as I primped in front of the mirror, and I did want to be seen. I was very aware of how I moved and acted when I wore a dress and makeup. As if I was rehearsing for the big performance. I don't know what's come over me, but I liked it.

So, after checking myself in the mirror one final time, we closed the shop for the day, and went downtown to lunch and visit a few of Evie's friends, mostly suppliers, at their stores. I was introduced as her niece, Allisa, and nobody even guessed I was anything but the young lady I presented. I was so relaxed, I felt I was a born-again female, and secretly wished I could be.

From that day on, every morning I routinely changed into my lingerie, applied some makeup, something I got better at doing as I improved my skill, touched up my hair, which I was letting grow longer, and worked in the shop wearing a short dressing gown until Evie called for Allisa to model something for a client, which I did skillfully. The rest of the day I would wear the dress she had made for me, and even occasionally borrowed a finished dress for a special treat. I especially enjoyed modeling bridal gowns. In my mind they were the epitome of femininity. Trying some on definitely gave me some dreams at night about being a bride. It set me to thinking about men in a new and different way. Some time I’ll tell you about that.

Most all the garments fit me reasonably well, except for the few things that were special ordered for large women! And with the aid of my padded bra, I now have a wonderfully girlish figure. Narrow shoulders, small waist, larger hips and very smooth skin. My arms aren’t very muscular either, which helps with my female image. I now spend all my working time at Aunt Evie's dressed and behaving as a girl, (it's our secret from the family) with her encouragement.....it's my job. I even run errands as Allisa to Evie's friend's stores to pick up supplies. They enjoy seeing Evie's niece and often engage her in small talk. Sometimes they tease her about boyfriends. Allisa has to be clever about her answers.

One summer afternoon, business was slow so we took a break for some ice tea. Aunt Evie felt like talking.

"So tell me dear, now that you've experienced what it's like to be a girl for a while, what do you think? Is it what you expected?" she asked.

"Yes and no, Auntie."

An interesting question, I thought. I might as well be open and honest with her. She was my ally. She made it happen.

"I love the way I look and feel...I mean, I like the freedom of a skirt bouncing around my legs and my legs touching each other without rough trouser legs between them...I enjoy the extra attention I get and the little courtesies people show me as a girl that never happens to a boy, but on the down side, it's a lot of work to be a girl! I must remember all the ladylike gestures such as keeping a good posture, keeping my skirt down, and my legs together. And, as a girl, I find people often don't take what I have to say very seriously. They seem to treat me like a child altho' a pretty one. I don't sense that as a boy. When Al talks, they'd at least pay me the courtesy of letting me finish. As Allisa, they talk right over me and usually ignore what I have to say anyway. I get so frustrated I want to yell, but I remember I'm a lady and ladies don't do that."

Evie laughed. She reached out and touched my hand warmly.

"My love, good for you. You're beginning to learn the differences between genders. I know you've worked hard to create and maintain your feminine appearance, but I also know it's been the labor of love. If you didn't want to do it, you would stop. That's why I've given you the opportunity to dress and act like a girl...I think it's something you really want to do. As for how you're treated, you've discovered one of the difficulties of being a woman in a man's world. Men always seem to treat us as objects to look at and desire, but not to be taken seriously. You must work that much harder to prove yourself. And, when necessary, to use your feminine wiles which you'll develop in time because I know you want to. Men don't have that problem...they're given the benefit of doubt. I'm sure you find it especially difficult because now you've seen it both ways. You know what? Next summer, let's you and I take a vacation trip together with you as a young lady. I want you to spend some continuous time that way to really see what it's like instead of this on again-off again dressing. How does that sound?"

"Oh Auntie, I can hardly wait, ....thank you!"

She was both understanding and consoling. Sometimes I felt closer to her than to my own mother. I wondered how mother would react if she saw me dressed as a girl…another daughter. Would she be so understanding? She wanted me to be a girl, anyway, but I'm not so sure how she would react? What about my older sister? They've got to find out eventually.

Allisa is really looking forward to going on the vacation trip with Aunt Evie. She's wearing her hair as long as she dare without it being too obvious. With curly hair, it’s not too noticeable. She now regularly shaves her legs and underarms like all the other girls in her age group and is flirting with boys when out doing errands, just for the sport of it.

We’re coming closer to the school year, and Allisa will only be working and dressing weekends. But that’s OK, I can go out as Allisa on evenings when my parents and sister are away. I’m really enjoying all this. Who knows where this will go?

It had to happen. Entering the fitting area late one afternoon from an errand to pick up some thread, I said

"Here's the thread you ordered, Auntie."

My sister was there talking to Evie!

"Al, is that you?" Sis asked, surprised.

Evie smiled, but said nothing.

"I would never have guessed, but I recognized the voice and I thought I was seeing my double. Why are you dressed like that? How long have you been doing this?"

Turning to Evie, Sis said, "You knew about this and you never said anything?"

"It was our little secret, dear. I figured he would tell you when he was ready."

I could only stand there blushing like a teenage girl, which is what I looked like anyway.

"Well, I have to say, you make a very convincing girl, even if you do look like my twin. I wish I would have known....we could have had a lot of fun," Sis said, turning back to me.

Trying to explain, I said, "it started innocently enough, Aunt Evie asked me to model a dress as a favor to help her out of a bind, and it just sort of grew. I got caught up into dressing as a girl more and more."

"You don't have to explain it to me....as long as you're happy doing it, I don't care. I think you always wanted to wear girl's things. I noticed you watching me dress whenever you could, and asked a lot of questions boys don't usually ask. Isn't that so?"

"Yes, I suppose I did" I muttered, blushing again.

"Oh, don't make him blush anymore," Evie interceded. "Now that you know, will you keep our secret?" she asked.

I didn't know what to do or say. I wanted to cry. If my sister told our parents or friends, I'd die of shame.

"Sure I will, Evie. In fact, I'll even help him dress whenever he wants. I'd love to have a little sister. When we were little, I wanted to dress him in my things at play and he always refused. Now I find out he does it behind my back. Anyway, it's only fair, I wear his things whenever I want. He never complains."

Turning to me, Sis said, "I'll keep your secret, little brother, but you owe me one, OK?"

"Yes, Sis"

"By the way, what name do you use as a girl?" she asked.

"Allisa," I responded, waiting for the laugh.

Sis took my hands into hers and said, "Allisa, I like that. Hello, Allisa. We're going to be good friends, I know."

Evie and I smiled and breathed a sigh of relief. A big hurdle overcome.

From that time on, my sister's attitude towards me was entirely different. We became very close instead of the sibling rivals we had always been. She discussed things with me that were never mentioned before. Girl things. She asked me when I decided to wear girl's things since I never did when we were little. I replied that I had nothing more than a curiosity about dressing in girl's clothes until Aunt Evie asked me to model for her, and then it escalated. It was then that I began to enjoy things feminine....it was a real turn-on for me. I found myself enjoying being a girl more and more. In the privacy of our bedrooms, Sis let me try on many of her outfits to model for her. She admired the lingerie Evie had given me and offered me some of hers. We even exchanged makeup and hair tips.

I turned 17 that summer, and, in the Fall, started my sophomore year in high school. Sis had graduated and started full time employment. I was working part-time for Evie, cross dressing whenever possible. It became very difficult to think like a boy.

 

THE DATE

One day, late in the Fall, Sis came to me with a problem.

"Alissa, I need a very big favor from you. (We had become like sisters) There's this cute guy at work I'm interested in. I finally got him to ask me out on date, but he's hesitant and wants to double date with his boyfriend if I could get his friend a date."

"So?," I asked.

"So I promised to fix up his friend with Connie for Saturday night."

"So is there a problem? She's your best friend...she'll help you."

"Yes! At first, Connie agreed, and everything was set. Now Connie is sick and cant make it. I really want to go out with Bill. I worked hard to set this up and without a date for his friend, it's off. I don't know if he'll ask me again...at least I don't want to risk it."

"So what can I do to help?" I asked.

"Will you take Connie's place as Allisa? Please? You owe me one, remember?"

Sis was calling in her mark in a way I never expected.

"You're asking me to date a boy? Come on! I'd never get away with it. I'm not a real girl. He'd kill me if he found out. Be reasonable!" I responded frantically.

I had mixed emotions...scared, yet intrigued. Might be kind of fun. A real challenge. But she has to convince me.

"Allisa is a beautiful girl and very feminine. You have no problem passing as a girl anywhere. This will be easy. We'll just go to a movie. All you have to do is be there and act natural as a young lady....you've had plenty of practice. C'mon, give it a try...please?"

"What if he tries to make a move on me...what do I do?"

"Whatever you want him to do. Consider yourself as the woman you want to be, as the woman you feel you are. That should be easy for you. Please?" Sis continued to plead.

I was convinced...at least, I felt she thought I was. Actually, I wanted to try it. The supreme test.

"OK, I'll do it for you...I owe you, I know. But consider the debt paid."

I was killing two birds with one stone.

Saturday night, I dressed for my date at Evie's apartment with her help so my parents wouldn't see me. I wore the pretty dress she had made for me, she had done my hair up and back into a curly bob, and with extra time spent on my evening makeup, earrings, pantyhose, and high heels, I looked older than my 17 years. And, oh yes, she advised me to wear a panty girdle I borrowed from Sis just in case. (I had the ability to make myself very flat in front to resemble a real female). Sis and her friends picked me up at Evie's and I was introduced to my date as he got out of the car and opened the door to the rear seat.

"Jerry, this is Allisa," Sis said as he gently took my hand and helped me enter the car.

"Hello Jerry," I responded cheerfully. I could even sound feminine.

He was a big guy and very handsome...this was going to be fun as long as he didn't read me as a boy, and after a final checkout in the mirror, I didn't think that was going to be a problem. I never felt so much like a woman. He had a pleased and admiring look on his face as his eyes checked me up and down. I liked that. My coat was open and the curves of my breasts were noticeable under the thin dress. I was aware of his eyes stopping there. OK, I thought. I would have done the same. Sis introduced me to Bill, her date, as we started out to the theater. We made small talk en route, and upon arrival, Jerry opened the door on my side of the car and, taking my hand, helped me out, a real gentleman. I noticed him looking at my legs as I swung them out of the car, knees together, and stood up in a ladylike fashion. This pleased me too. My dark shaded nylons and the high heels enhanced the shape of my legs, as intended. During the movie, Jerry made no moves except to put his arm around me which seemed harmless enough. I snuggled against him as he would have expected a girl to do, and he held me tighter. It was actually quite comfortable. I was enjoying my first date, and it was as a girl with a boy!...all I had to do was look pretty and act natural. Naturally what? I still was mixed up. Am I a boy in girl's clothes, or am I really feeling like a girl?

After the movie, we went for some pizza. I was careful to take the smallest pieces and take very tiny bites. I had to be a lady at all times. I felt both boys looking at me....were they admiring me or did they suspect something? I'm sure it was the former. Sis kept the conversation going, talking about work with Bill, her co-worker, and just trivia in general. Jerry was very quiet, just a good listener, but he couldn't keep his eyes off me. I was confident of my appearance, so that didn't bother me; in fact, I was flattered. I tried to be warm and friendly to him, without leading him on too far. He reached for and held my hand under the table, of which I offered no resistance. He would expect that too. Finishing eating, Sis and I excused ourselves to go to the lady's room. As I refreshed my lipstick, we talked about our dates and how it was progressing. Sis was pleased with Bill, and happy to see the Jerry and I were getting along so well. She noticed us holding hands and asked if I was going to let him kiss me, suggesting that I should. I reminded her that I was not a real girl, to which she smiled and winked. She treated me like a real girlfriend on a date, not as a brother helping her out of a bind. I was surprised by that

As we stood up to leave, Jerry helped me with my coat, opened doors for me, and continued these little gestures of courtesy. It pleased me and made me feel even more of a woman. Of course, he probably shamed Bill into doing the same for his date. Arriving back at Evie's, where I planned on spending the night, Jerry walked me to the door.

"Thank you for a lovely evening," I said to him, looking up into his eyes.

He was tall, burly, and handsome, and very gentle. I had never looked at a man like this before, nor had I ever felt so vulnerable, but the combination of his behavior towards me and the way I felt with my transformation had a strange effect on me. I felt more feminine than ever before, a feeling I did not dislike 'tho I knew it was irregular.

"Will you go out with me again?" he asked, holding my relatively small hands gently in his large hands.

"Yes, that would be fun," I immediately responded, without thinking.

Then it hit me....What did I just say? What did I do! I'm a boy...I'm not supposed to be dating a man in the first place! And a second date? But I said yes, and now I'm committed.

With that, Jerry pulled me close, put his arms around me, and softly kissed me on the lips. I was totally surprised by the move, but, I submitted to his kiss. I relaxed my body and lips and returned his kiss until he released his hold on me. I cant say I didn't enjoy it, but I'd never admit it. It was a man kissing a woman. The only words spoken were, "I'll call you, Allisa" as he returned to the car and departed into the night. I could like Jerry as a boy, but I liked him more as a girl. He's such a gentleman. I was swept off my feet on my first date. Really my first date...I had never even dated a girl and now I was dating a boy! Wait till I tell Sis. Dare I tell Evie? I let myself in, changed into a nightgown, removed my makeup, and slept soundly that night in the guest room, completely confused by the events of the evening. 'If I'm a boy, why did I enjoy myself so much as a girl dating a boy? If I'm a girl, why shouldn't I enjoy myself with a boy? If I'm a boy, why do I want to be a girl? If I'm a girl, why am I being raised as a boy? What will we do on the next date? Why did I enjoy his kiss? What if he wants more than a kiss? I envisioned more than a kiss.’ On and On, my thoughts whirled...................Sleep came slowly.

The next day, I disclosed little to Evie except that we went to a movie and pizza and it was fun dating as a girl. She was pleased that I enjoyed myself. But, Sis and I did a total recall of the date. I told her I was kissed and I confided that I really liked it, which pleased but didn't surprise her. She really considered me to be her sister. When I said I had accepted another date with Jerry, she was in awe. I admitted it slipped out without thinking, but what's done is done. I have to follow thru. She was delighted and agreed to help me any way she could. My friendship with Jerry would enhance her relationship with Bill. All I could ask for was her panty girdle again. She offered to buy me my own.

Jerry called and set the date up for the following Saturday night. He took me bowling and out to eat afterwards. On the way home, we parked and talked for a while. I now completely relaxed and put my being a boy out of my mind. It was a typical boy-girl conversation. We eventually embraced and I snuggled into his arms where I felt most comfortable, even as his hand gently caressed my breast. After a while, he kissed me softly, followed by more passionate kisses. I enjoyed his kisses but somehow I felt it was wrong...I should not be enjoying them as much as I did! I was completely submissive, allowing his advances up to the point of heavy petting. His hands were on my legs under my skirt, sliding on the smooth nylon of my hose. His touch was slow and gentle but, I couldn't let his hands wander too far what with my foam filled breasts and hidden treasure within my panty girdle, namely my hard, throbbing penis, straining to be released from it's nylon containment. How I wished my bra was filled with my own flesh. If I now had any feelings of guilt about my gender, they were diminished by my feelings toward Jerry. When we kissed, it felt so right. I just relaxed and enjoyed the moment....I could fall in love with this man…maybe I was! Later, when talking to Sis, I felt ashamed of my reaction to Jerry's advances, but she told me not be. What I did was perfectly natural for a girl and that's what I had considered myself to be. I told her the jury was still out on that subject, altho at times, I did agree with her. Jerry and I dated a few more times until I felt it was going too far. I was enjoying his advances too much and felt it had to end before we got too close and we both would be hurt badly. It's what I would have wanted if I were in his position.. I was having thoughts and feelings about him that worried me. In my dreams, we were constantly having sex together; I wanted him to take me as a woman, and I wanted to please him, and I was enjoying it! This could not be. I wasn’t ready yet although it was close…. We had to break up so I told him I was leaving town for a job in New York. Sis reluctantly agreed. I think she would have preferred I stay with Jerry and be his girl but, I think she was being selfish.

I continued to work for Evie through my senior year of high school as Allisa as much as possible. No more dates, not even with girls. As a boy, I wasn't too popular with the girls socially as I was very quiet, shy, and small, but those qualities were probably useful in attracting girls to associate with me for help with schoolwork being I was a good student and always got good grades. I was never a sports jock, so socially, I blended in with the wallflowers. I had no boyfriends either, for the same reasons. They avoided me completely. But I enjoyed being Allisa, because she made friends easily. She wasn't shy but instead, playful and outgoing. She brought out a different side of my personality. She allowed me to be the person I wanted to be. Through Sis, I met new friends as Allisa and was accepted by them as Sis's younger sister. Allisa was developing her own social life.

Eventually, my parents discovered my cross dressing. Mother spotted me wearing Sis's dress one day while I was helping her hem it. Strange, that's how this all got started. Anyway, Mom exclaimed that I could be a twin to Sis, we looked so much alike. One thing led to another, and I wound up modeling some other of Sis's dresses for Mom. She was impressed at my appearance, my long hair, and how effeminate I acted while cross dressed. I finally admitted what I had been doing. That explained why I had let my hair grow so long, had pierced ears, and shaved my legs and underarms. She also had seen a gradual change in my personality. I hadn't noticed until she mentioned it but I had become more passive and less argumentative than a normal teenage boy. In retrospect, I was becoming more womanly....probably due to all the time I spent as Allisa. I had figured it was just maturity, but she knew better, having raised two other boys, my older brothers who were considerably older and were already living away from home. She agreed that as long as I was happy with my cross dressing, that's all that mattered. She would love me no matter what I did. She had no problem selling Dad on what I was doing....he wasn't too disturbed either. My parents originally preferred to have two boys and two girls anyway, so it was fine if I wanted to be a girl. As mentioned earlier, they had hoped for a girl when I was born. Maybe I should fulfill their wish.

 

VACATION

The time came for Aunt Evie to fulfill her promise of a vacation trip. We settled for a trip to New Orleans, traveling as two women. I was to spend two weeks totally as a woman. I packed only women's clothing...the only male article was my shaver, and I hardly needed that since I mostly used hair remover on my face. We flew to our destination and rented a car with Evie as the designated driver. Al's license wouldn't work for Allisa. Checking in at the hotel, Evie had reserved a single room for us to share. That seemed harmless enough for two ladies, but we discovered the room had only a single king size bed. And no other rooms were available. Not unusual for two women to share a bed, but our case was a little different. I think it bothered me more than Evie because I'd never shared a bed with anyone.

I was excited about staying en-femme for two full weeks, wearing makeup on a regular basis, keeping my hair looking nice, not having to change back to boy's things every day. I seemed to be in a constant state of arousal, something Evie noticed the first night in bed. Dressed in our silky nightgowns, we took our places in the large bed on opposite edges of the huge bed. I fell asleep easily and must have dreamed of being in Jerry's arms, because suddenly I woke up in Evie's arms, tightly pressed against her body and my hands caressing her breasts under her gown which had drifted up to her waist. My manhood was hard and poised between her legs. She did not move me away, but instead held me tightly and comforted me. She said I was moaning and kissing her. She rather enjoyed it. Being a relatively young widow, she hadn't been with a man for a long time. I apologized for disturbing her and gave her a long tender kiss on the lips and fell asleep in her arms since she didn't want to release me.

This woman was only about 16 yrs older than me, and very attractive for her age. I had never considered her anything but a close family friend, a surrogate guardian, but my attitude was changing.

In the morning, we showered and dressed for a day of sightseeing. I chose a bright, flowery, summer dress with a half slip and a lace camisole, white pantyhose, and low heeled shoes, good for walking. I applied my makeup and brushed my long curly hair into place. Evie, likewise put on her makeup, and I helped her with her hair, putting it into a bun. She said nothing about last night and I didn't mention it either. We set off to see the town. Most of the day was spent in the French Quarter, dining in famous restaurants and visiting museums. Evie not only referred to me as Allisa...she treated me totally as a woman. Once, when I thanked her for that, she replied,

"No need for that,. this is what you wanted and I'm only trying to make you happy. When we return home in two weeks, you can thank me then, if you still want to."

I knew I would.

Another day of sightseeing, as we joined a group and toured some of the ante-bellum mansions. I felt so naturally female, I was chattering like a teenage girl, talking to our tour companions. Everyone was so nice and treated me like the young lady I appeared to be, and I loved it. I was the youngest girl on the bus, and the driver made sure to look after me. Of course, the tight, low neck, jersey Tee shirt and the short skirt I was wearing with nude pantyhose may have helped. Evie enjoyed the attention I got and my reaction.

Going to bed, the second night, I turned off the light and rolled over to kiss Evie goodnight. I kissed her on the cheek and thanked her for a lovely day. She pulled me to her and our lips met in a long wet kiss. I sensed the passion of a lonely woman. I reached down and touched her warm, soft breasts through her gown. She retained my hand on her breast and fondled my soft stem with her other hand until it got hard and hot. Saying nothing, she turned onto her back and pulled up her gown as an invitation. I lifted my nightgown up to my waist and assumed the dominant male position, and my rigid shaft easily slid into her waiting, wet opening. It was heaven. She brought her legs tightly together and clamped my center inside her, consuming me. So soft, so warm, so wet. She had exchanged my virginity with the ultimate gift of love. I was having sex with my aunt....but then, she's not my real aunt. She's the woman who has nurtured me since I was born and now I was repaying her in her time of need. I was the young, innocent...she, older, experienced. The fulfillment of every young boy's dream. I alternately kissed and sucked the nipples of her supple breasts until they became erect, while fondling them with both hands. I was fixated by those beautiful mammary's. Oh, how I wanted my own. I then worked my way to her lips where our tongues met and tasted each other's lipstick. Being my first, this whole experience was new to me and I climaxed too quickly. She accepted my charge graciously, with a low pleasureful moan of ecstasy, and didn't wait for her own climax but rather, relaxed and let me withdraw. Her only comment to me was,

"forgive me, my love...it's been so long since I've been with a man."

I hugged her and kissed her again. We embraced and went to sleep. I was thinking, 'Ah, those beautiful breasts...how I wished they were mine. But, I must settle for foam rubber.'

The third night was another new experience. This time, in the dark, Evie delicately lifted up my gown, rolled me onto my back, gently fondled my genitals to get me hard and, straddling my body, mounted me in the traditional male dominant position, guiding my throbbing, hot shaft into her receptive, wet opening.

She said, "tonight, I'll be the man and you're the woman you want to be....see how you enjoy it, my love."

She worked her body slowly up and down, kissing my lips, my nipples, my neck, holding me tightly, touching me all over, definitely dominating me. I was completely submissive to her and enjoyed it immensely. I knew this was my place, where I truly belonged. I fantasized that she was Jerry and he was making love to me. I was his woman. His body was on mine, his manhood was inside of me! She picked up the pace until I could wait no longer and climaxed, shooting my generous wad into her. Shortly thereafter, she reached orgasm with a loud moan and a sigh....the first time I'd felt her climax, the walls of her love canal undulating, milking my organ of it’s seed.. I'm sure she preferred to be on top where she could be in control for the best sensation. She rolled over and we both fell asleep. This time, I had no guilt feelings about my fantasy. I had been taken by my lover.

While taking my morning shower, the curtain opened and Evie joined me!

"Let's pretend I'm your husband and you're my wife?" she asked, soaping my back.

"How did you like sex from the woman's position?"

"It was heaven....I think that's where I belong," I answered. "and I think you enjoyed being the man."

I didn't want to tell her of my fantasy, but I couldn't stop thinking about Jerry either.

"Well, I certainly do enjoy the dominant position, that's why I want to be your pretend husband. Is that OK?"

"Oh Yes, dear," I responded, girlishly.

She turned me around to soap my front and noticing my erect penis, she washed that first, making it harder. I wanted her to finish it, but she stopped rubbing. I took some soap and lathered her chest and delicious breasts. She willingly let me touch all of her body which confused me even more...at this moment, am I a man enjoying a woman, or am I a lesbian with another woman? In my feminine frame of mind, I feel like a lesbian, but I have no remorse.

"You're going to need a panty girdle for that thing if you cant control it," rinsing the soap off my still rigid member.

I could only smile, but by now, I wasn't the least bit shy. She looked at my boy's chest with only a little flab for a bosom and shook her head.

"I wish I had your breasts," I offered.

"I wish I could help you there, my love, but until you decide what you want to do, we'll leave that alone. A padded bra will have to do."

She rubbed soap on my nipples, saying "my poor dear, if only these would grow."

Her rubbing made my nipples hard.

I asked her what my options were to get female breasts. She said I could get breast implants or try hormones, but I had to very sure I wanted enlarged breasts because they would be difficult to conceal as a man so I would have to commit to being a woman and I was not ready for that. Maybe she was wrong. I left her alone in the shower and went to get dressed. The first thing I put on was my bra with well formed foam inserts and looked at myself in the mirror, wishing they were real. I loved the look they imparted to my body.

Every day was a new experience with new things to see and do. I was completely happy being Allisa full time. Evie began to play the role of my husband and treated me as if I was the wife, escorting me around during the day and dominating me at night. I was completely submissive to my "husband" and enjoyed every minute. The sex on this trip was certainly an unexpected treat. Thank goodness for the error with the hotel room. I lost my virginity and found happiness as a woman. This vacation was turning into my honeymoon and I was the bride!

The two weeks went by too quickly, and soon, we headed home. Evie asked the question:

"Well, Allisa, you've lived as a woman for two full weeks. Do you think you'd like to make it permanent?"

To which I enthusiastically replied, "Absolutely yes! And I especially liked being a wife."

"Oh Allisa, you're hopeless," Evie said, with a wink and a kiss, "I thought you would tire of this activity and I could perhaps change your mind."

"Well Evie, after all, you did start the whole cross dressing thing," I said, giving her a big hug and whispering "Thank you".

 

THE BRIDESMAID

After graduation, I left Aunt Evie's employ for a full time job, but I still helped her out occasionally, especially at night. She continued to help me cross dress, and I helped her with her nocturnal "needs" as a good wife would do for her husband. Yes, the game continued. I secretly hoped to find employment as Allisa, perhaps as a secretary, but I knew that was going too far. That was not to be; I wasn't ready to commit. Allisa continued to be only a part-time but very frequent visitor. I joined my sister's group of friends as Allisa, Sis's younger sister, and was easily accepted. It was the only social life I had. As Al, I was a dud, besides, I had become too effeminate for a boy. I preferred to be Allisa. Allisa was pretty, and popular. She was invited to party's and shopping sprees with the girls. I was happy as Allisa, but I knew I had to make a living as a male. As a compromise, I found a job as a photographer's assistant gaining on-the-job training. I was able to keep my hair long, and my effeminate appearance, earrings and slight makeup, did not draw unusual attention in the world of art directors, hairdressers, and cosmetologists. My cross dressing skills came in useful when helping models dress, applying their makeup, and arranging their outfits for the photograph. My employer was extremely impressed with my talent and found it very useful, and the girls were comfortable working with me. If he only knew how I learned those skills. On occasions such as Halloween parties, I'd appear in woman's costumes and blow everybody's minds. They couldn't believe how feminine I looked, yet it was so natural for me. Many of the clients thought I was a real girl and wanted to date me until they learned my true gender. My boss loved it.

Delores, a long time friend of Sis’s and mine, was to be married. We all got involved with the plans of the large wedding. I was asked to take candid photos of everything, which I willingly agreed to do as my gift to them. I built up a series, starting with gift selections by the bride and groom, gown selection and their fitting (yes, I could attend the fittings), reception hall, etc. I attended the rehearsals with my trusty camera, and shot many pictures. Two days before the wedding, a minor disaster struck. One of the bridesmaids fell and fractured her leg, requiring a large cast and the use of a wheelchair. She couldn't be in the ceremony as planned, upsetting the balance of attendants. This caused a financial ripple effect all the way down to the respective groomsman's tux rental. Delores needed a replacement fast to avoid a lot of embarrassment and ill feelings. Sis suggested to Dee that maybe Allisa, our "cousin" who was visiting, could fill in as a replacement. Dee did not know Allisa and that I was she. In desperation, she begged Sis to ask Allisa. Sis then asked me if I'd do it, to which I replied that I'd be happy to, but that meant the end of the candid photos since Al would suddenly vanish. Sis said she'd cover for me with some excuse that I was called away by my boss for a location shoot. Allisa was introduced to Dee and was immediately invited to join the wedding party at the pre-nuptial dinner on the eve of the wedding. Sis, also a bridesmaid, and I, assisting each other, proceeded to dress in outfits befitting the occasion and attended the dinner where we were introduced to the out of town guests and other members of the bridal party. I tried to make myself look slightly different than my sister so we didn't appear as twins. Her hair was down, I wore mine up. She wore a skirt, blouse, and matching jacket, while I put on a pretty dress and my highest heels to make me taller. My large hoop earrings finished the look. I was introduced to my escort for the ceremony, a handsome young man who couldn't take his eyes off of me. He tried to hit on me all evening, but I kept my wits this time. I was now an experienced woman and didn't want to date another man, although he was tempting and it was very difficult to decline his invitations. So confident was I as a woman that I no longer had guilt feelings about dating a man. But, I was attracted to another bridesmaid, a petite and very pretty girl named Elaine. She was even smaller than me. We became friends, instantly, and got better acquainted as the evening progressed. We both attracted the young men, but we stood our ground and hung out together, as girls do.

Early the next morning, the wedding day, Dee sent over the bridesmaid's gown I was to wear. Sis and I went to the church to get dressed for the ceremony, getting an early start. We knew it was going to take time to transform ourselves. We met the other girls there...a total of four bridesmaids and the bride. We all helped each other dress in our gowns and do our hair and makeup. I wore a black bustier with attached garters and blue stockings to match the gown.. The garment cinched in my waist and enhanced my figure to a very feminine shape. My bra was filled with expensive silicone breast forms glued to my skin, which I had recently purchased on the advice of a professional makeup artist. With proper makeup, you couldn't see where they attached to the skin. They looked and felt very natural and formed a noticeable cleavage. This was my supreme moment. Presenting myself to a crowd of people in a gown similar to what I wore the first time I cross dressed. Only, I was now very experienced at appearing and acting as a woman and no one doubted otherwise. My experience with the photographer's models and their professional makeup artists came in handy. I did my makeup with extreme care, and helped the other girls, especially Elaine to whom I paid extra attention. Although all the girls were running around in various stages of undress in the dressing room, seeing Elaine in her bra and panties was a real turn on for me...I considered her special. Somehow, with her, I felt like a man.. The bridesmaid's gowns were a light blue with an off the shoulder décolletage, and it fit my small body perfectly, and displayed a little of my breast and cleavage as intended. The hem, just above the knees and worn with three petticoats for fullness, showed off our legs. The shoes, colored to match the gowns, had 3" heels and were a perfect fit. With my past experience, I had no problem walking in the heels. I wore dangling earrings matching those of the other girls. We were all stunning. The ceremony was beautiful. I felt wonderful walking down the aisle with my tall, handsome, escort and all eyes upon me, and standing at the alter with the other girls. As usual, I was confident of my appearance. I kept thinking to myself, 'I look like a woman, I feel like a woman, I am a woman.' The thought gave me comfort.

At the reception following the ceremony, I sat next to Elaine. We had searched for each other. We chatted throughout the dinner, and stayed together all evening, even going to the ladies room together multiple times. I really liked her. We even danced together, not unusual for girls to do, until the boys cut in and we had to dance with them. I didn't mind dancing with the boys, but I preferred to dance with Elaine. This night, I wasn't in the mood to flirt with the boys....my thoughts were only about her. Late in the evening, when I could be alone with her, I asked Elaine if she'd like to go out with me sometime.

"You mean go to lunch and shop together? Yes, I'd love to, Allisa," she responded with interest.

"Ah…Well, not exactly. This may sound strange, but I mean like on a date," I offered cautiously. Now I was committed...I must follow thru. In my mind, with her I was Al, overlooking the fact that I presented myself as Allisa.

"Allisa, I don't DATE GIRLS!" she admonished.

"What if I told you I'm not really a girl...would that make a difference?" I asked, risking everything. I really wanted to date her but I hoped I wasn't chasing her away. I had to try. I had very little experience asking a girl for a date, and here I was, doing it dressed as a girl.

"Oh yeah, right! I don't believe you...is this some sort of joke? Are we on Candid Camera or something? What do you mean you're not a girl....you're as female as I am...why, we've been in the ladies' room together..I..I've seen you in your undies when we were dressing....your voice, your figure, you've got breasts! If you're not a girl, then neither am I," she retorted in disbelief. "You're teasing me...Why are saying this? I was starting to like you as a friend...now this cruel humor. Why?" she asked, her eyes filling with tears.

She started to walk away.

"How can I prove to you that I'm really a male?" I asked, pleading, searching in desperation.

I couldn't very well ask her to feel my manhood under my dress, nor could I lift my skirt and expose my genitals to her. What could I do but try to explain.

"It's just that I've been cross dressing for a long time and I've developed a feminine appearance. I fool everybody. My breasts are silicon rubber glued to my skin. The rest of what you see is real but a result of training. I'm here like this as a favor to Dee because Gail broke her leg and Dee needed a last minute replacement."

"Then if you are a man, who are you, really? I only know a girl named Allisa."

Now Elaine, regaining her composure, was curiously interested.

"I'm Sis's brother Al, I'm not really her cousin from out of town as everyone was told. That was just a cover story. I live and work here. I'm a genuine male, Elaine, and I've gotten to know you, I find you attractive, and I want to date you, as a male. Does it offend you that I'm a cross dresser?"

Elaine was almost speechless. She knew Sis through their friendship with Delores, but she didn't know Sis had a brother. When she thought about the situation, she said,

"No, I'm not offended that you're a cross dresser, but I'm a little embarrassed that I believed you are a woman. You're very convincing, to the point that you make me jealous of your appearance. I know, it was your intention to make everyone think you're a woman, and it wasn't meant to be a malicious deception....I understand you're only trying to be helpful. I think you make a very beautiful and talented woman even if you are a male. I'd love to go out with Allisa; I think having lunch and going shopping with her would be fun, but I don't know this Al person. I'd like to meet him, so, yes, I accept his offer of a date. It would be like a blind date....even tho I'm talking to him, I don't know what he looks like. But, I've met Allisa and I like her and I don't want to lose her friendship either."

"I can guarantee you, you wont lose Allisa....we're a package deal." I replied cheerfully.

"Why didn't Dee find a real girl to substitute for Gail?" Elaine asked.

"For several reasons, I guess. I had attended the rehearsals and knew the procedures, I was available on short notice, and my sister knew I'd fit the gown and would be willing to wear it. That's a tall order to find anyone else so quickly," I responded.

Elaine nodded in acceptance of my reasons.

"You're right...it was nice of you to pitch in like that. I don't know of any other boy who would sub as a bridesmaid for a friend," she said, winking at me, with a big smile.

We continued to talk on a more calm basis. A big hurdle had been overcome for me....I could finally relax.

"Tell me, Al, why do you like wearing women's clothes?" Elaine asked with a genuine curiosity.

"I guess it's a long story, Elaine. As a boy, I've always been sort of a dud. I'm a little guy, and I always felt inferior. Seems like nobody ever paid any attention to me. But, I had an opportunity to cross dress and experience being a woman in public. I found that I was noticed more and treated far better as a woman than as a man. I enjoy the little courtesies I'm shown. I sense a personality change too...as a woman, I can climb out of my male shell I created as a defense mechanism and be myself...be who I want to be. I can laugh and cry without shame, I can be cheerful and funny, things girls can get away with that boys can't. I don't have to compete with the macho guys, and do "guy" things...something I never have been good at. I've always preferred the softer, gentler, more "womanly" things, I guess you'd say. So, that's why I enjoy posing as a woman....besides, I like the way I look and feel as a woman, I've been told I'm better looking than in men's attire."

"Wow, that's some explanation," Elaine responded. "You've got me worried, I've not seen you as a man. Well, I've never tried to be a boy to see how the other side behaves, but I think I can appreciate how you feel. Of course, if I behaved in a masculine manner, I'd be considered a Tom Boy, and that's not unacceptable. It's too bad that in our society, you, as a male, have to resort to impersonating the opposite sex to behave the way you would like. As a man, you'd be considered a sissy, or as they say now, a "sensitive" or "new age" man. But, as a woman, of course, you fit right in. If you enjoy that, I say go for it! You do a great job. I can see you've had a lot of practice and obviously do enjoy it. I'm not at all offended. I think it makes you a better person, more sensitive to a woman's needs, what with first hand experience. In fact, I think it would be fun to get together. I certainly enjoy Allisa's company, and I'm sure you enjoy being her."

Elaine and I did start to date and continued to see each other regularly. She was actually my first real girlfriend. Strange, I had dated a boy before I dated a girl!...and tho I was comfortable as a girl being with the boy, I preferred being a boy with a girl. Often, I would go as Allisa which Elaine enjoyed because, as girls, we could do different things than we would as boy-girl such as shop for and try on clothes in the fitting rooms together. We could clown around, flirt with men, and generally have a good time. Al's personality was different and the dates were more of a serious nature. As a boy, I wasn't comfortable being so outgoing. I think Elaine got a kick out of the contrast. I filled her in with all the details about Allisa, how I started and my experiences as a girl, especially my date with a boy, which intrigued her, especially the part about the kisses and how I enjoyed them. She was fascinated by my ability to easily transform myself into a woman, with a corresponding personality, a nicer, warmer one than Al's. I sometimes thought she liked Allisa more than Al, but then, why not, I did.

Elaine and I were married (yes, she was the bride), and although I continue a normal daily routine of living as a male, Allisa is with us every night and weekends. Elaine prefers my feminine side. After all, she met Allisa first. We do most everything together as women, even vacation.. Our sex life is more of a lesbian relationship with both of us alternating the dominant position. I keep my body as feminine as possible with shaving and body lotions. I maintain my hair long, tied back into a pony tail, as a male, and styled as Allisa, and I wear only lingerie under my male clothes and change to all female attire at home. As a professional photographer, it doesn't raise suspicion, and Elaine prefers it because she knows it makes me happy. Because of my petite size and feminine complexion (I've had electrolysis to remove my beard), I'm often mistaken for a woman. I'm flattered. Elaine even thinks I should wear a little makeup on a daily basis. I'm working up to that. Maybe a light lipstick wouldn't hurt. What will she suggest next, a dress? If I were to do business as a woman, I'll have to lower my rates. Actually, I think it would be an asset being a lady photographer. I'm halfway there now, anyway.

Through support groups, I joined the transgender community. When they learned I was a photographer, I gained a lot of new business photographing transgendered people and same sex weddings. They felt comfortable with me.

Delores was eventually told the truth about Allisa. She was both surprised and flattered that I would do that for her. Her wedding photos are a permanent record of Allisa as a bridesmaid and she sent me a set.

 

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© 2001 by Alyssa Davis. All Rights Reserved. These documents (including, without limitation, all articles, text, images, logos, compilation design) may printed for personal use only. No portion of these documents may be stored electronically, distributed electronically, or otherwise made available without express written consent of the copyright holder.