Camp Shoni

by Pamela

pamelapamela@hotmail.com

 

Chapter 12

Lauren had a hard time deciding what she ought to wear to the first dance of the summer. While she knew exactly what she was going to wear to the cotillion, and in fact, checked up on her pretty dress where it hung in the closet nearly every day, there were a multitude of options for dressing for the weekly dances. Finally she decided on her prettiest sun dress since Joan and Thalia had commented on how much they liked it. Most of the girls in the cabin were wearing skirts and dresses, though a couple decided to wear shorts, mainly because they weren't very happy with the dresses they had brought to camp.

Underneath the dress Lauren wore the padded bra that made her look the fullest - it was one that she had specially saved for the dances - as well as a particularly pretty panty. With the help of Joan she went to great lengths with her makeup to make sure that her eyebrows were thin and graceful and her eyes highlighted with the right amount and color of mascara. She apologized profusely to Joan that she was of no use in helping her: her mom had been such an obstacle to learning how to apply makeup that she knew practically nothing.

Particularly exciting for Lauren was the chance to put on perfume. She had brought with her a special fragrance that she thought was very sexy. She imagined that when wearing it she would be at the center of an irresistible scent that would drive the boys crazy and make them seek her out. Because of her past life as a boy, she thought that only she among the girls truly knew how great an effect perfume could have on them.

Promptly at 7:30 Marilyn gathered the 8 bunnies together, looked them over and declared them to be the prettiest and most lovely girls that had ever been in Camp Shoni. She led them across the field to an old barn that had been converted into a place where the campers could have dances and meet on rainy days for any number of other activities. The floor was of shiny maple and ideal for dancing. Lauren's heart beat a mile a minute as she walked with the others. All those years at Camp Dan she had never been to a dance and now finally she would find out what it felt like to be at one. Since it would also be the first time she interacted with boys as Lauren, the evening had the possibility of being filled with either disappointment or exhiliration. Would the boys find her attractive or would they avoid her? She prayed that with so many boys to chose from, there would be a real possibility that romance could come at any moment.

Inside the barn there was a sound system set up and a DJ. Only for the cotillion would there be live music. On one side of the room there were tables containing sodas and snacks and scattered around the edges of the dance floor were tables and chairs for the campers to sit at. Lauren sat nervously with Joan and Thalia waiting for the boys to arrive. It wasn't long until a few busses pulled up outside the barn and boys began streaming in. Lauren scanned the boys checking to see if Owen was among them. She was worried that Owen could figure out who she really was, particularly if he was to find out what her name was. Avoiding Owen, if he did show up, was something that she would make every effort to do.

The boys were wearing casual clothes and they varied over a considerable range of heights and ages. Some were acting too noisy and their counselors, who had accompanied them, whispered warnings to them that they would be banished from the dance if they didn't act like little gentlemen. The music began playing and Lauren regarded the empty dance floor wondering what would happen next. By the third song, a few girls got up to dance with each other and Lauren saw that one of them was Marcie. She was fearless and quite a good dancer. Since their encounter the first day of camp, Lauren had gone out of her way to be deferential to the stronger girl whenever she passed her during the day or at dinner. For her part, Marcie didn't seem to care much about Lauren one way or the other, though she did once smile with amusement at her, as if Lauren were her cute little sister. Lauren was happy to find out that Marcie was less of the evil bully she thought she was. Perhaps she just liked teasing the bunnies for the pure fun of it.

By the fourth dance, a few of the bunnies got up to dance and Lauren could see that Joan was itching to dance also, so almost spontaneously the friends got up together and began dancing. Joan danced comfortably while Thalia seemed a bit awkward. Lauren, at first very shy, found herself becoming at ease, mainly by copying the steps she saw the other girls doing. Finding the beat had never been a problem for her as Lorin and it was no problem now. Lauren looked at Thalia and Joan and the girls laughed with happiness at the good time they were having.

When the dance ended, one of the counselors from Camp Dan picked up a microphone and exhorted the boys to participate. A few walked over towards the girls as the next song started. They were some of the older boys and Lauren watched with interest as they checked out the girls and finally asked some of them to dance. Once these boys broke the ice, a flood of other boys inched their way over towards the girls. Lauren, Thalia and Joan returned to their seats and engaged in a stilted conversation while they wondered if any boys were going to ask them to dance. Out of the corner of her eye Lauren saw a boy their age come over and stand in front of Joan.

"Dance?" he said.

He was maybe 14 years old, wearing a white shirt and black pants and looking terribly uncomfortable. "Sure," Joan said and got up. It was a fast dance and the two of them set off together mingling with the other dancers. Lauren wondered if this meant that Joan was the most attractive of the three of them. She did have the nicest figure by far and she was pretty so there was little reason to not believe that she would be most sought after. While the guy who had asked Joan to dance was not especially handsome, he was kind of cute as Thalia remarked after Joan had left.

Thalia said, "wait a few more dances and then all the boys would have gotten to this side. None of them want to be the last one sitting on their side of the gym."

"Just like none of us want to be the last one asked to dance," Lauren said.

"You're so pretty Lauren, you'll have too many boys bothering you before long."

Thalia must have been prescient, since at the start of the next dance, a slow one, a rather tall boy with a few red spots on his face from acne, came up to Lauren.

"Wanna dance?" he said nervously.

"Sure, I'd love to," Lauren said.

Acting as if Lauren were radioactive he indicated to her where to go in the midst of the paired-off dancers. Lauren followed him and the boy awkwardly took Lauren's right hand in his left hand and put his right hand behind Lauren's back. Lauren felt him pull her in towards him a bit and Lauren put her hand across the boy's back. The boy began leading Lauren to the music and she concentrated as hard as she could on responding to whatever signals the boy might give her.

Lauren didn't know whether she should say something or not, and then decided that it was up to the boy to start the conversation. The boy was a couple of inches taller than her and she felt his cheek resting against her hair. He was not a particularly skilled dancer, but he did seem to keep with the music. As the dance progressed Lauren felt the boy draw her in a bit closer to him to the point where she felt her breasts were touching the front of his shirt.

"I'm Paul," the boy said without warning.

A bit startled Lauren said, "I'm Lauren."

"Cool," Paul said.

Lauren could tell he was extremely nervous and decided that she ought to put him at ease. That was quite a turnabout for her, since as Lorin she would have been just like Paul in the same circumstances.

"Do you like Camp Dan?" Lauren asked.

"Oh, yeah, it's great, well it's not great it's OK. I mean it's sometimes great, sometimes OK."

Lauren suppressed the desire to laugh. Regardless of how difficult Lauren found this experience, Paul was having a far harder time. There was silence for a minute and Paul said, "do you like camp?"

"Yes, I love it. It's so much fun and the girls are great."

"Wish I could say the same about the guys. Some guys are nice but some guys aren't."

"I guess that covers it," Lauren said, but Paul did not seem to pick up on the joke.

The dance ended and Lauren smiled at Paul. There was an awkward moment and since Paul didn't say anything Lauren sidled back toward where she had been sitting. No boy had asked Thalia to dance and she was seated where Lauren had left her. "You didn't dance?" Lauren asked with concern.

"Lucky me," Thalia said, "I'd much rather do a fast dance."

Joan came back and said, "I saw you dancing Lauren. How was that guy?"

"His name is Paul. I guess he was all right," Lauren said unenthusiastically. "Not exactly easy to talk to."

"That's so often the case," Thalia said. "Most guys I've danced with in a slow dance are about as fascinating as a block of wood." Lauren and Joan laughed. "It's a big reason why I prefer fast dancing, then I don't have to worry about talking at all and it's more fun."

"The guy I danced with is cute, but you're right. It's tough to get a lot of them talking," Joan said.

Another dance started and this time guys in quick succession came over to ask Thalia, Joan and Lauren to dance. A short, kind of homely boy with silver braces on his teeth asked Lauren to dance. He flailed his arms hopelessly missing the beat and Lauren used the time to gaze out over the room to see if there were any boys that she should hope would ask her to dance. It was odd that she would be thinking such thoughts, since it was only a little more than a week ago that she had been with Penny in the guise of Lorin. Some of the boys were cute and several Lauren remembered from years past at Camp Dan. None of them seemed to know who she was. One boy on the far side of the room standing by himself looked familiar to Lauren and then she realized that it was Owen. He must have had quite a growth spurt over the winter since his face was longer and he looked to be maybe a foot taller, if that were possible. Clearly, even though Lorin and he were close in ages, Lorin had not entered puberty to any degree close to that of Owen.

Lauren looked away and hoped that Owen would not notice her, or if he did, would not ask her to dance. She did have to admit that Owen was a pretty handsome guy and from what she could see, he had begun the process of taking on a manly build. As soon as the dance was over, Lauren smiled wanly at the guy with whom she had been dancing and hurried off. Almost immediately another song started and Lauren found herself looking at an older boy who, without missing a beat, said, "dance with me." It wasn't so much as a question as an order and Lauren reflexively agreed to the command.

The guy was a skilled dancer and made constant eye contact with Lauren. She found herself looking away coyly and then back at him and finding him still looking at her. "I like the way you dance," the boy said which made Lauren blush. The boy came over closer and right in front of Lauren did some shimmying which made Lauren laugh slightly. The boy laughed also. Over the din of the music he said, "I'm Roy, what's your name?"

"Lauren," Lauren said. The guy twirled around so Lauren was facing his back, then he came around again and worked his way around behind Lauren and then moved himself closer and closer so that he was approaching her from behind. Lauren had seen pictures of girls with their booties shaking over a guy's crotch and figured that was what Roy was up to. It was definitely a suggestive motion and Lauren wondered about the appropriateness of it. Marilyn had told the girls that the camp did not tolerate any overly sexual dancing styles. The kids would be given one warning and then they'd be banished from the dance.

Lauren swiveled around herself so she was facing Roy. "We have to be careful," Lauren said and then realized that she had given tacit approval to the act, if only under different circumstances. Roy smiled again at her. The dance ended and before Lauren could decide whether she should stay or not, a slow dance started and Roy took Lauren in his arms. He was much stronger and controlling than the first boy she had danced with. Roy led Lauren forcefully and with confidence and Lauren found that it was easiest to let herself go and naturally adapt to his movements. Roy held her pressed up against himself. His arm went securely across her back pushing her into him. Halfway into the dance, he let go of her hand and encircled her back with both of his arms. "You're nice," he murmured, "and I'm crazy about that perfume."

Lauren didn't know what to do. She had little strength with which to resist him or to redirect him into a less intimate position. "Man, that perfume is something else," he said again. She felt him pushing his hips in towards hers and then she had the distinct impression that she felt a sort of hard bump pushing into the lower part of her belly. Could it be his penis she wondered. What else could it be. She felt trapped but also glad, in a strange way, that Roy found her so desirable. It was a new thought, that boys might aggressively want to make sexual advances toward her. She felt so unprepared to deal with it. She would have to talk with Joan and Thalia as soon as the dance was over. It was a long dance and Roy seemed to be taking every advantage of it. Lauren felt like every part of herself was flush up against the larger boy. She could feel a steady pressure from what she was now certain was Roy's excited penis. Any moment she expected one of the counselors to separate them, but judging by many of the other couples around them, the way Roy held her was not that uncommon among the other boys. Finally, the dance ended and she hurriedly said, "thank you Roy, I have to freshen up," and did a little curtsey. She walked back to where she hoped Thalia and Joan would be returning. They reappeared in a second and Lauren said, "do you have to use the ladies room?"

"Definitely," Thalia said and Joan added, "that's a great idea." They picked up their purses which were on the floor next to their chairs and headed off to the bathroom. On the way Joan said to Lauren, "who was that hot boy you were dancing with? He was like all over you!"

"His name is Roy and I don't know what happened. He just sort of wrapped himself around me! I think my perfume drove him crazy!"

"He's really cute. I wouldn't mind it if he came on to me like that, but that would be all he'd get!"

"Exactly," Lauren said relieved that Joan had helped define for her what the limit should be. "I'm sure he'll take whatever he can get, given the chance."

"Boys are so ridiculous," Thalia said, "but then why do we get freaked out if they don't come on to us!"

"Who did you dance with?" Lauren asked her two friends.

"This guy Greg," Joan said, "and then there was Benny and Bob or Rob or something like that."

"I just danced with this boy Owen," Thalia said. "He's really cute."

Lauren wondered if it was "the Owen." She would have to keep a closer eye on Thalia. "I like that we get to dance with lots of different boys."

"That's the way it is now, but after a few weeks I think we may know all the boys. I hope by then there is someone special," Joan said.

"Don't you have a boy friend at home?" Lauren asked.

"Sure, but I think it'll make the summer a lot more exciting to have one here. And then at the cotillion we could be exclusive - sort of like a prom."

Lauren had not thought about this before, and she realized that she'd probably have to actually think about deciding on a boy she would like to spend the cotillion with. Without a doubt, anything that diminished the excitement of the cotillion had to be avoided if at all possible.

"I liked most of the boys I danced with," Thalia said, "but I do think Owen is special."

Lauren wondered if Thalia were giving her friends a warning to stay away from him. "What if he asks Lauren or I do dance?" Joan said.

"Gosh, I didn't mean to say that he's mine," Thalia said. "Go ahead and dance with him if he asks you. If he ends up with someone else then I suppose it's meant to be!"

Lauren thought to herself that Thalia would have nothing to worry about as far as Lauren was concerned. She was going to make sure that she didn't dance with Owen!

***

During the dance Amy sidled over to where Marilyn was standing. Together they watched Lauren as she did a fast dance with one of the boys. "That's a very pretty dress Lauren is wearing."

"She has very feminine taste," Marilyn said. "I have to admit that she's a girly girl. I did try our little tricks to see what I could see about her, but they didn't come up with anything. First I sort of burst in on her in the shower, but she happened to be quite well lathered up, particularly on her front and I can't say much at all. I didn't get a clear enough look to decide definitely what equipment she's got there so we can't rule out either possibility. Actually, when I thought about it later I was thinking that maybe I did see a little red something poking up out of the suds, but it might just be my imagination. "

"How did Lauren react to you entering the shower?"

"She jumped with surprise, but I did sort of suddenly sneak in, so I think any of the girls would be surprised. The one strange thing was that she immediately rinsed off but kept her back to me the whole time. Once again, it wasn't necessarily because she was hiding something."

"What about the letter?"

"I want to talk to you about that. Today a letter came for Lauren from someone named Beth. It was sent from Lauren's home town. It could be phony I suppose, but I saw Lauren reading it in her bunk and she looked truly absorbed in it. Then she got out her stationary and wrote a letter back to this girl. Anyway, I decided not to give her the L-O-R-I-N letter without first talking to you."

Amy pondered the new information and shook her head. She looked again at Lauren dancing nearby. "She sure dances like a girl. I'm at a total loss what to do now. I suppose we just have to sit tight and wait to see what happens next."

"I can try the shower trick again."

Amy looked at her and smiled. "Wait awhile. A couple of weeks, so we don't come across as too fanatical. Anyway, she'll let down her guard by then and maybe you'll get a clear view."

The song had ended and Lauren was now chatting with Eileen and Judy who had been dancing near her. "Just look at her," Marilyn said. "If that isn't a girl I'm a monkey's uncle." Lauren looked delicate, graceful and ever so girlish to the older women.

***

Though she didn't reveal it to Amy or Marilyn, Lauren felt aware of the fact that the counselors were looking her way. Just another piece of evidence that they were on to her. Thank goodness for the letter from Beth she thought. Once Beth started sending more letters it might shut down all suspicion, that is, as long as Camp Dan didn't forward any mail. The most damaging letters that could arrive from Camp Dan would be post cards from China signed "Mom and Dad." One would certainly think that the parents of a camper would know which camp their kid was going to!

As long as Lauren put her worries about Ms. Rovelstad and Marilyn out of her thoughts, then she was having an absolutely wonderful time at the dance. The boys clearly thought her desirable, there was no longer any doubt about that, since virtually every dance a boy came up to her to ask her to dance. She danced a couple of more times with Roy and even again with Paul who seemed to be loosening up and enjoying himself more. It was grand.

A few times Lauren could see Owen nearby causing her to turn her back toward him and to dance slowly way from his position. Every so often she saw that Owen and Thalia were dancing and she wondered if they were getting into some sort of relationship. If so, it meant that Thalia was bound to bring Owen over to meet her and that that could be a recipe for disaster.

A really cute boy whom she had her eye on asked Lauren to dance a slow dance and she gladly accepted. As they started to dance Lauren said, "I'm Lauren and who are you?"

"I'm Phil. This is my first year at Camp Dan. I think it's a nice environment for helping the maturation process. You know, socialization, socializing. It's important, a main part of networking and thus a useful skill to acquire. Becoming a business titan is who I am. The fast track to success, to acquire a certain formidable base of wealth and, not coincidentally power is my goal."

Phil paused to take a breath and then continued ranting about his ideas on business, politics, adolescence and so on. Lauren tried to keep up but eventually began counting the seconds until the dance would be over. Apparently, being cute did not preclude a boy from being an utter bore and Lauren would have to be a lot more careful what she wished for in the future. It was unbelievable that Phil could not see how rude it was to not include Lauren in the conversation.

Phil was so preocuppied with himself and his endless monologue that he neglected to guide Lauren in the dance and she felt like they were standing still. Lauren looked at the couples around her to pass the time. Joan was dancing with Roy. With some amusement she noticed that Marilyn was dancing with one of the counselors from Camp Dan. Finally, after what seemed like an interminable amount of time the dance ended and Lauren thanked Phil and began walking away.

"I like you," Phil said catching up with her and holding her by the arm, "shall we dance again?"

Surprised, Lauren didn't know what to say and the opportunity to make up an excuse passed. Lauren resigned herself to one more dance during which time she would prepare herself to get away. As the music started however, out of nowhere Marcie came up to them and said, "I need to talk to Lauren."

"Oh? Really?" Phil said bewildered.

"Yes," Marcie said assertivley, "come with me Lauren," and she led Lauren away.

Phil called out, "later?"

Lauren smiled back at him and said nothing. She couldn't imagine what Marcie wanted with her and said, "what are going to do to me?"

"Chill Lauren. I'm not as evil as you think. Like I said I would, I've been keeping my eye on you and I couldn't help but notice that you were sinking into the Phil trap. I had to rescue you."

Lauren's expression showed incomprehension and Marcie continued, "girls have to look out for each other, particularly with creeps like Phil alias Mr. Motor Mouth. He's such a moron that I couldn't stand by and let you get sucked in."

Lauren laughed and said, "that's so kind of you. I had no idea that you..." What she wanted to say was "gave a shit about me" but instead said, "that you were willing to help out a bunny."

"You're right, I shouldn't help the bunnies, but there is something about you that needs watching so I might as well help you out if I have to."

"Gosh," Lauren said, "I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. The lesson for today is that you have to learn to stick up for yourself. You have the upper hand with boys, even if they might dominate physically. You have what the guys want. So take control."

One of the older boys came over and asked Marcie to dance. "All right Bob, in a minute" she said. To Lauren she said, "do you get what I'm saying little bunny."

"I think so. Thanks, Marcie," Lauren said.

"Good," Marcie said and she and Bob walked away. Lauren saw Joan sitting in her chair and walked over to her and sat down next to her. The short boy with braces who had danced with Lauren earlier came up to ask her to dance again, and she declined saying she wanted to rest a little. The boy then asked Joan and she said the same thing. He then walked away looking for another girl to ask. Not far from them Marcie and Bob were dancing. Marcie was a terrific dancer. Though her athleticism was evident, her shapely body moved with grace and feeling.

"That Marcie is amazing," Lauren said.

"Marcie?" Joan said.

Lauren pointed to her. "So that's Marcie," Joan said. "She's the head of the wolves from what I heard. Someone said she's so tough it's like she could be a guy pretending to be a girl!"

"You're kidding!" Lauren said blushing.

"I also heard a rumor that last year she snuck out of her cabin one night and met up with one of the guys from Camp Dan."

Lauren said. "Isn't that enough to get you kicked out of camp?"

"Yeah, but the counselors never caught her doing it."

"She stopped me the other day when I was walking back to the cabin. She teased me about being a bunny. It was even kind of scary, but now I think she's actually pretty nice."

"Why's that?"

"I was just dancing with this guy Phil. He was going on and on and on about himself and his business philosophy or something like that. I couldn't understand it, it was miserable. And then I couldn't get away from him when the danced ended and suddenly Marcie intervened."

Joan laughed, "you better point him out to me when you get a chance! I don't understand guys like that. Where do they get their egos from?"

"Exactly," Lauren said, "they're not really interested in us as people."

"They just want our bodies!"

Lauren started to laugh and then stopped when she realized that the statement was also true for her, though perhaps in a different way from most guys.

Joan saw Thalia in the distance dancing with Owen again. She said, "look over there it's Thalia with Owen again. It looks like they're making a connection."

"Really?" Lauren said. "I guess Thalia is lucky."

"Maybe, maybe not. I think it's better to wait a few weeks before letting any guy think he has you. You get to meet everyone little by little. If you couple off early and things don't turn out nice, like they usually don't, then you have a lot of weeks you have to avoid them at the dances. It can get ugly."

In front of them a tall lanky boy was doing a fast dance with one of the older girls. She had on tight jeans and Lauren watched how she moved her pretty butt to the music. If Lauren grew up to have a butt like that she'd be the happiest girl in the world.

When the dance ended the DJ announced that the next dance was a "ladies choice." Lauren blushed and said, "what do we do?"

"Let's get us some hunks," Joan said in a silly voice causing Lauren to laugh.

"Yeah, let's go!" Lauren added.

Joan got up and Lauren followed her as she moved around the dance floor. Lauren could see that some of the girls were approaching guys here and there asking them to dance. Nearby they saw Thalia starting to dance with Owen.

"Thalia must have asked Owen," Joan said.

"I hope it works out for her," Lauren said.

"Do you see any hot guys?" Joan asked.

"I'm looking them over," Lauren said.

"What about those two tall dreamy guys over there," Joan said, indicating two of the older boy campers. "You take one and I'll get the other!"

"Do you really think so?" Lauren said. They were definitely among the two hottest boys at the dance.

"No problemo!" Joan said.

Bolstered by her friend's self-confidence, Lauren said, "sure, let's do it!" and the two girls made their way over to the boys.

When they got there Joan said, "the two of us want to dance with the two of you."

"Oh, do you now," one of the guys said. "I'm Fred and this is Brian."

"And I'm Joan and this is Lauren," Joan said.

Lauren smiled with amusement as the two guys checked she and Joan out. Finally Brian said coming up close to Lauren, "I'll take this cute one if you take that cute one."

"Deal," Fred said and he and Joan together with Lauren and Brian walked to the center of the dance floor and began dancing.

Lauren decided that Brian must be some kind of athlete since there was a solidity and tautness to him that she felt the moment he held her and she put her arms around him. Unlike Roy who had overwhelmed her by practically crushing her body, Brian enveloped her solely through his muscular presence. She had the distinct feeling that Brian could snap her in two like a twig if he wanted to, but yet there was a gentleness to the way he firmly guided her around the dance floor.

"You're a good dancer," Brian said after a minute.

"You're not so bad yourself."

"Just, not so bad? That's it? Ouch!"

"I didn't mean to hurt your feelings!" Lauren said with mock horror. Even though she had been dancing with boys in the role of a girl just for a couple of hours, she had already caught on to how boys liked to tease girls.

Brian pulled back to look in Lauren's face only to see that she was laughing. "I had you so fooled," Lauren said.

"You're a funny girl. I like funny girls."

Lauren smiled to herself and found that Brian had changed his position slightly so that she ended up snuggling closer to him. "What sport do you play?" Lauren asked without even thinking that she should first ask to see if he even played a sport.

"Football, and some lacrosse too."

"Wow," Lauren said.

"I'm a tight end on the varsity. I'll be a senior next year. What about you? What sport do you play?"

Lauren laughed. "I'm not very good at sports. It's so funny that you think that I am."

"I was being polite," Brian said and this time it was Lauren's turn to find out if he meant it as a joke or not. "I had you this time."

Lauren liked Brian. "You're easy to talk to," Lauren said. Brian smiled at her. It was suddenly clear that Brian never had trouble getting girls. He probably got every girl he wanted. Whether he would want Lauren or not was not clear. If he did then it would be up to him to show it and Lauren would just have to wait to find out.

The dance ended and Fred came back with Joan and the four of them stood together. Lauren had seen Fred and Joan in a tight embrace as they danced and she wondered if if meant anything. A fast song started and the two guys this time asked the girls to dance.

While she danced Lauren wondered if Brian would have ever asked her to dance on his own. For her own part, she did vaguely remember seeing him earlier in the evening, but had filed him away as being too old and, she had to admit, too hot for her. Thank goodness Joan had more courage than she. She wondered if Brian had seen her earlier and thought her too young for him. Anyway, it certainly didn't seem to matter much now. She and Joan were having so much fun dancing with them and the two guys looked like they were also having a good time. It was definitely going to be a highlight of the evening.

When the song ended, the DJ said that there was time for one more dance, a slow one. Brian and Fred showed no sign of wanting to leave the girls and then they wordlessly took Lauren and Joan in their arms and the two couples resumed dancing. This time Brian put both of his arms across Lauren's back and pressed her gently into him. Lauren held him tightly herself, putting one hand on the back of his neck and enjoyed the intimacy. The lights lowered slightly and then some more. Lauren closed her eyes and then as if in a dream she felt Brian's lips on hers. He kissed her gently and she found herself kissing him back. They moved slowly in the dark in a tight embrace, every so often exchanging another kiss. Lauren wondered if Brian could feel her breasts pressing against his chest. She could feel his fingers slowly tracing the outlines of her bra where it lay across her back and then she felt his hand sinking onto her butt. Something in her mind was telling her to stop him but another place in her mind didn't want to disrupt the wonderful moment and she let it evolve as it would. The thought that her body could give pleasure to Brian seemed to be the culminating idea of the evening and a clear signal that she was seriously becoming a girl at every emotional level. She wished the moment would never end, but finally the lights gradually increased in intensity until they were fully on. Lauren and Brian loosened their hold on each other.

A counselor took the microphone and directed the boys to return to the bus. "I hope we'll see you next week," Fred said to the girls.

"That might be arranged," Joan said.

"I'll have to check my calendar," Lauren said.

"You two are priceless," Brian said.

The two guys said "bye" and the girls watched as they left for the bus. When they were out of view, Joan and Lauren retrieved their purses and met up with Thalia.

"Wow, what a night!" Lauren exclaimed as they walked slowly back to their cabin. The air was balmy and slightly humid and Lauren breathed it in deeply feeling more alive and filled with happiness - as Lauren - than she had been so far.

"Did you make a connection with that last boy you were dancing with?" Thalia said.

"Brian? I think so. I hope so," Lauren said. Later that night, when the lights were out and she was under the covers, she was going to let herself remember every wonderful detail about Brian. Just the thought that those memories were there waiting to be remembered made Lauren feel giddy with happiness.

"Lauren!" Joan said. "You better slow down, way down!"

"What do mean?" Lauren asked, puzzled.

"Brian and Fred may still want to hang with us next week, but don't count on it. They could very well not dance with us at all. They could easily find some other girls to play around with."

"But, I thought they were crazy about us!"

"You've got a lot to learn about boys!" Joan said. "They'll act any way they have to to get what they want!"

Crestfallen, Lauren fought back tears. Joan put her arm over Lauren's shoulders. "I didn't mean to disappoint you, but you obviously haven't had too many experiences. It's better you go into a relationship with Brian with no delusions that it's something other than what it is."

"But Joan, you don't really know that," Thalia said feeling sorry for Lauren, but also worrying about her own situation with Owen.

"You're right Thalia, I don't know, and it could end up being really nice, it's just that I think Brian and Fred are the kind of guys who just like to have fun. They probably like lots of girls and especially playing with new ones all the time. Anyway we'll find out next week."

"I suppose you're right," Lauren said, "but can't I still hope?"

"Sure Lauren," Joan said.

"Don't you feel Fred is really hooked on you? You were dancing so close!"

"I think he was hooked on me for that dance. I don't know about next week. I think we should focus on who we like among the boys and then maybe if we're lucky one of the ones we like also likes us. The three of us danced with a bunch of different guys and I bet some of them right this minute are worrying if we'll be willing to dance with them next week."

"I know you're right," Lauren said. "Marcie told me that girls have the upper hand in a relationship and we shouldn't forget it."

"Right," Joan said. "Pining away about Brian or Fred is useless. Let them pine away about us!"

"I don't know," Thalia said, "I'm pretty sure that Owen will be thinking about me all week, but I'm also sure that I'll be thinking about him too."

"He's our age so it's a whole different story. Brian and Fred are older. I think it makes a big difference," Joan said.

"Still, I guess it doesn't really matter," Lauren said. The rest of her thought which she didn't say was that at least she had had this night. A wonderful night with boys making her feel like a girl. It was a new idea to her that boys could have such a big effect on her feeling feminine, but it was true. Their desire for her made her feel like a real girl, not just a pretend girl. Perhaps it was their desire for her body, for the chance to hold her. The special way they took in her perfume and let their lips and nose rest against her hair. Lauren had had all of that this night and most especially with Brian whose manly presence seemed to bring out what was most feminine in her. She decided that regardless of what Joan or Marcie might say, she would still allow herself the luxury of fantasizing about Brian. If next week she was hurt, that would be next week and she would deal with it then.

  

End Chapter 12

  

  

  

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