The Bridal Gown               by: Janet L. Stickney             JanetLynn17@Hotmail.com

 

The bridal gown I had on put me in a sea of white satin, Irish lace, pearl buttons and crinoline. The bodice was tight, accenting my newly enforced shape, creating breasts and a narrow waist. They turned me to face the mirror, then, as I saw myself, I had to swallow, really hard. From head to toe, everything that defined me as a male was gone. My blonde hair stuck out from under the hat, my chest pushed up leaving the impression I had breasts, and wearing the heels, I found myself standing straight. No matter how hard I tried, I could not bring myself to tear my eyes from the bride standing there, because the bride standing there was beautiful.

How had I ended up like this? Well, my Aunt Mary was getting married, the arrangements were well under way, then she was in a car wreck, and broke her leg, pelvis, and two fingers. The doctors said she would be healed up by the time of the wedding, but things like getting fitted for her dress would not be possible. Our family is quite small, Mom, me, Aunt Mary, and Grandma and Uncle Art, who doesn’t know what year it is. When her condition became clear, Grandma and mom started to look for someone Aunt Mary’s size. At age 16, I was still a skinny kid, and just as tall as Aunt Mary. How it happened, or who thought of it, I don’t think I’ll ever know, but one day, mom and Grandma descended on me, then told me what they had in mind. My first reaction was to say no, but they told me that all it would be is standing there with the dress on while the seamstress made the alterations. They said I would have to wear heels for the right length, of course, but it would only take a few days of my time, and since we would be in a bridal salon, what could hurt? Soft touch that I am, I agreed.

Mom had me remove my shirt, then took some measurements. After she and Grandma made a few calculations, they told me they were going shopping for a few things. I probably should have guessed what was about to happen. About two hours later mom returned home alone. In her hands she had several bags, most from a popular department store, one from Cindi’s Hideaway and one from a shoe store. As she passed by me, she crooked a finger, and I followed her to my room.

"Grandma and talked it over, and after I took your measurements, we were certain. Your waist is almost three inches to big, and of course, you don’t have any boobs, so we went out and bought you a few things so you’ll be comfortable, and be able to fit into the dress. It also goes without saying that we really appreciate your doing this for Mary."

I watched as she opened the bags and spilled out the contents. I could understand the shoes, even the pantyhose. Then I saw the panties, corset and finally, the dress. The dress was a pale blue with a pair of straps at the shoulders and zipped up the back. I had no idea why she bought a dress, which shows how dumb I was at the time.

"Why did you get a dress Mom? I mean, I can understand most of this stuff, but a dress?"

"You’ll look pretty silly wearing everything else to the salon if you don’t wear a dress. Picture yourself with boobs, a narrow waist, pantyhose and heels, all with you in jeans and a pullover shirt, then tell me I’m wrong."

"But why can’t I just change there mom?"

"Because all of their clientele are women! Letting a man in there to change would probably upset some of the other women, which is why we bought you enough stuff to get by on. You can simply walk in, then change, all without anyone knowing you are a male."

As that news sunk in I saw mom staring at me, and began to get edgy because I knew what she was doing. Mom was figuring out how to turn me into a girl. One that was about to become a bride. "We’ll do it in the morning" she said, leaving me to hang up the clothes and put them away. Looking in the mirror I tried to imagine myself as a girl, but simply couldn’t picture it. At 130 pounds and 5’7", I’m just your average teenager I guess. Clear skin without acne, blonde hair that hung to my shoulders, and a pair of really boss eagle earrings. I held my hair back, then pushed it up from the back, all without success, but I was sure that I would find out how I looked in the morning. In fact, I was positive I would know how I looked as a girl.

Since I had volunteered, there wasn’t much I could say the next morning as mom smeared that awful cream all over me. I wasn’t that hairless, but after I had washed the stuff away, there was nothing at all left below my eyebrows except in my groin! It was chilly standing there, my skin so naked like that. Now, I had never dressed as a girl before, even at Halloween, so I was unprepared for what happened next. Mom handed me some new panties, I slipped them on, then saw a serious problem. The thin material did nothing to hide the obvious, so I took the time to tuck things away, for the moment anyway. With my hair still damp, she sat me in a chair and began to put rollers in my hair, one after the other until she had almost depleted her supply. Then she sprayed my hair with something, put a plastic cap over it all, and took me to her bedroom. Watching her in the mirror, she applied the foundation, a powder, then a pale eyeshadow, black eyeliner, then a peach blusher. Mom did it quickly, yet when she was done, I could see that it was more than possible to turn me into a part time girl.

Back in my room she showed me how to fasten up the waist nipper, then how to put on a bra. This one had a fastener in the front, and as I made it secure, I saw that the bra had pulled up almost all of the loose skin on my chest and heaved it into the cups of the bra! I now had small but firm breasts! Mom used what she called an enhancer, slipping one into each bra cup, filling out each cup, making it look as if I had my own breasts! Then she pushed some oval pads made of foam into my panties, making my hips rounder and wider. The pantybrief smoothed everything out, and as I looked in the mirror, I saw a girl standing there! The pantyhose were slick, making my legs shapely and smooth, and gave me a shiver as I pulled them on. The slip was white. I stepped into it and pulled it to my waist as mom took the dress off the hanger and handed it to me. I put it on and she zipped it up for me. Looking in the mirror, I saw that more and more of the real me was disappearing, and this girl was emerging. Scarier, she didn’t look to bad. The shoes were white heels that mom said I would have no trouble walking in.

As mom removed the rollers and brushed out my hair, she let it fall around my face in waves of curls, teasing it higher in places, then added a barrette on each side of my head. The lipstick she handed me was a soft red, which I used to color my lips. Earrings and a watch, a necklace and a dash of perfume, then she said I could look in the mirror. The minute I saw this new girl I was in love. Pretty, the girl had long sexy legs with breasts that weren’t too big, nor were they too small. The scent of the perfume filled my nose, and I stood there wondering how mom knew. I saw her taking the wallet out of my pants and put it in a purse, along with the lipstick, some tissue, and a small brush.

"What shall we call you now?"

"Huh?" was the best answer I could give her as my eyes were still locked on the vision in the mirror.

"You need a girls name silly. Donald just won’t do when we are in the salon."

The very first thing that popped into my mind was Diane, and that’s what I said. Mom loved it, and from that moment on, she always used the name when she spoke to me. I wasn’t worried about being seen this way, after all, I had a very good excuse, and it wasn’t as if I liked it. Well, I didn’t hate it anyway. I did like the way I looked, a little, maybe. In the kitchen I made some coffee while mom set out some toast and melon slices. After we ate, mom suggested that we go see Grandma, so she could meet Diane. That was when I got slightly nervous, but dutifully followed mom out to the car. No rushing, but not lingering either. What if the neighbors saw me like this? Mom laughed at my concern, and simply backed out of the driveway, waving at out neighbor as we pulled away. From the moment Grandma saw me she couldn’t stop smiling, which was very disconcerting. From there we went to the bridal salon.

There were a few women there, not many, but some, and my innate sense of myself told me to be wary, yet nobody gave me so much as a second glance. Mom talked to someone, and within a few minutes I was in the back with some stranger telling me to undress! Grandma unzipped the dress, and while the dress was still loose on my shoulders, I glanced at mom, then the woman.

"It’s okay Diane, I told her. Now slip the dress off so we can get started."

They all stood there waiting for me, so I shrugged my shoulders and let the dress slip off. Now I really felt naked! Without so much as an explanation, the woman handed me a huge petticoat which I gladly stepped into. At least half of me was covered up. The wedding dress seemed to be extremely large, but with mom, Grandma, and the woman helping, they slipped it over my head then zipped it up. I was facing the mirror at the time, and while I’m no expert on dresses, especially wedding dresses, even I could see that this one was spectacular. A satin bodice, cut low with Irish lace netting from the bustline to the neck, matching the sleeves. It had pearls sewn on the netting, small with an iridescent shine to them. Unable to resist, I smiled at my reflection. Mary would look just fantastic in this dress. I had to change into three inch heels, then the woman began to hem the dress while she turned the rotating table I was standing on. I was allowed to sit on a stool after each half hour, as it took the woman two hours to make marks, add pins, and tighten things up. By the time they took the dress off me I was tired from standing that long in the unfamiliar heels.

As I slipped my own dress back on the woman told mom that I should consider wearing a corselet, since that is what Mary had picked out to wear under the dress. I had no idea what a corselet was, until the woman left for a moment, returning with one in her hand, which is when I saw it, and understood immediately what it was for. Mom took it, telling the woman that I would have it on for the next fitting, which turned out to be three days away according to the schedule I saw on the wall. On the way out of the store, Grandma mentioned that it was lunch time, and without asking me, I soon found myself sitting at a table in a restaurant filled with people.

"I was thinking that Mary might like to meet Diane. After all, she is modeling her dress for her, and it would be a nice gesture. How about it Diane? Want to go see your Aunt Mary?"

I’m not so stupid that I couldn’t figure out that no matter what I said I was going to go anyway, so I simply nodded my head yes. Besides, and while even I was having trouble believing it, I was beginning to like the way I looked, feeling as if I actually were a girl. I know it’s strange, but I had a new sense of myself, and it wasn’t the least but masculine.

After lunch we went to the hospital, then found our way to Aunt Mary’s room. She was in a cast of course, strung up like a puppet on strings, yet she managed a smile the minute she saw mom and Grandma. I got a quizzical look.

"Mary, this is Diane. She is standing in for you so the dress can be fitted."

I saw the light come on as she realized who I was. She had only been told that I would do the modeling, so seeing me standing there dressed as a girl threw her off stride for a moment. Based only by the expression on her face, she was pleased, and surprised. I stood where she could see me, then went to hug her as best I could. Just then the nurse came in, and we were asked to leave. On the way out mom handed me the car keys so I could drive. It wasn’t as challenging as I thought it would be, as the heels didn’t make much of a difference. We dropped of Grandma, then went home. On the way, mom told me that I might as well keep dressing as Diane, since it was only three more days and I would have to do it again anyway. I failed to see why and said so.

"I can get dressed just like this again that morning mom. Why do I have to dress this way every day?"

"It’s just that I, well…" That’s when I knew what she was going to say, and I was right. "you know I always wanted a daughter, and now I have both a son and a daughter, all in the same person. Do it for me. Please?"

Not wanting to sound anxious, I demurred a bit before I grudgingly agreed. At least I hoped it sounded that way. Never having dressed this way before I was surprised to find that I liked it, and wasn’t against exploring this option a bit further. As soon as I said okay, mom started smiling, and on the way home, we stopped at the super mart. She bought two more skirts, a shell and another dress, which seemed to be overkill as far as I was concerned, but she didn’t ask me, she just did it. When we got home, she handed me the new clothes and told me to hang them up, but once I was in my room, I decided to try them on. The gray skirt was a mini, which exposed my legs to a point just North of mid thigh! I slipped on the pink shell top and went to find mom. She took one look and smiled, but didn’t say anything. As I walked around I was very aware that if I did not bend down like a girl does, my assets would be on full display, but the first time I reached for a soda, sure enough, I bent at the waist. This was going to be harder than I thought.

About an hour later the doorbell rang, and with a motion from mom, I answered the door. It was the lady next door, Joann.

"I thought I saw a young girl in the car this morning! Hi! I’m Joann. I live next door, and I was wondering if you would like to baby-sit tonight?"

"I, um, I’m not sure I can."

Just then mom walked out of the kitchen, and said "Of course Diane can baby-sit for you Joann, what time?"

"That’s great! Can you be there at six?"

"Um, yes, I guess so."

"Great! I’ll see you then Diane."

All at once it was getting a bit surreal. One day dressed as a girl, and I had tried on a bridal gown, bought more skirts, and now I’m about to baby-sit for the kids next door! Mom told me not to worry about it, the kids are only 3 and 5, and after they are in bed, I’ll have the evening to myself. Considering the age of the kids, I decided that a mini skirt wasn’t practical, so I went to my room and slipped on a pair of my jeans and changed into my gym shoes. Later I ate a quick dinner, then went next door for my very first baby sitting job. It turned out to be quite easy, as the kids were almost wore out by the time I got there. A little food, a quick stint in the rocking chair, and poof. They were asleep. I made twenty bucks for it too!

The next day, at mom’s urging, I tried my hand at makeup. Not as good as when mom did it, she said it was fine, and I set my hair in a ponytail. Mom seemed to be content to just have me there dressed as a girl, and not once did she ever suggest that I go anywhere or see anyone. But the house isn’t all that big, so I went out in the yard, saw the kids next door out, and went over. The little one, Jenny, hung on my leg like a leech, and I finally picked her up, drawing a toothy grin and a hug from her. Joann saw me, and asked me to come along when she went shopping. I could tend to the kids while she did the shopping. Bored to death, I agreed. I told mom who simply waved her hand at me.

I had Jenny by the hand while her brother, Keith, decided to stay with his mother. Jenny and I did a slow stroll through the store until she could not go any further, which is when I picked her up. Jenny fell asleep on my shoulder, and I was waiting by the exit, when in walked my Math teacher, Mrs. Grant. Everyone in school calls her Mrs. G. So far, nobody had recognized me, and I had grown secure in the fact that I was doing okay. But not Mrs. G. She took one look, and knew who I was. She saw Jenny, my makeup, boobs, hair and the mini skirt in a glance, and I saw her smile at me just as she walked over.

"I know most of the girls around here, but you’re new aren’t you?"

At a loss for words but stuck, I muttered the name. "Diane" I said quietly.

"You’re very pretty Diane. I hope I see you again. Have a nice day now!"

As Mrs. G walked away, I wondered what she would do, now that she had seen me dressed as a girl, and holding a baby to boot. I was lost in thought when some old woman stopped in front of me and began to berate me for having a baby at such a young age! It was getting really crazy. I had no idea so many busy bodies there were at a grocery store! When I got back home, I told mom about seeing Mrs. G, and about the crazy woman.

"You just ignore the people that have no idea what’s going on Diane. As for Mrs. Grant, I’m sure she won’t mention it, but I’ll call her and explain why your doing this. It’s perfectly fine for you to do this for Mary, and we all appreciate it. Nobody else has to know why unless you decide to tell them. Okay?"

"Okay mom, thanks."

On the morning of the next fitting, mom started out with the corselet. Up to that point all I could see was that it had a built in bra. That image was shattered as soon as the hooks were secure and mom began to tighten the laces. My normally 26 inch waist was compressed down to 23 inches, which, at the same time, had the effect of making the flesh on my chest get bigger due to the compression. I was dying there, and all mom did was reach into the bra, under my skin, and pull up. Then she used the same enhancer in each cup. All at once my modest bustline were the flowers, which looked like they were outgrowing the pots so to speak. I had a definite cleavage and the ripe, firm breasts of a young lady. I wore the pleated navy skirt with a white blouse and white heels. Mom had told me to do my own makeup again, telling me I had done it pretty well when I was done. She brushed out my hair, using a curling iron to create an entirely different look. I wore white panties and white pantyhose as well. Mom said it would look better with the dress. Myself, I thought it was sexy as hell.

The fitting went much like the first, except that now my boobs seemed to be bursting out, and were quite visible through the top of the dress. The seamstress was overjoyed when she was done, and took two pictures, one for her collection and one for mom to show Mary. After I had changed clothes, we once again went to the hospital where mom showed Aunt Mary the picture. Based on her reaction, she was quite pleased. Then she said that I looked so good as a bride that she wondered how long she would have to wait to see me in my own gown! Of course I protested that I was doing this for her, but she and mom gave me no relief when they both snorted when I said that. By the time we got home their reaction had me thoroughly confused. The very idea that I would someday be a bride. Really. I will admit that I had come to like wearing the clothes, the scent of the perfume and the taste of lipstick, but that didn’t mean I wanted to be a girl. It only meant that I found it interesting and pleasant.

Joann wanted me to baby-sit again, and when I went there, another lady asked me to sit her kids on Friday night! All at once I had committed myself to another entire week as Diane! Mom said it would be a fun experience, but did not add much else, except to say that I should probably get some jeans cut for a girl, and maybe some shorts, then she tossed me the car keys. If I left the house alone, it would be the first time I had done anything as Diane alone. Concerned but not scared, I grabbed the keys in mid air, picked up my purse, and left the house. I went to super mart again, since they had the best prices. I went in just as mom had suggested, as if I owned the place. As I looked at the clothes, jeans in particular, I realized that I had no idea as to what size to get! I knew that the size was in the waistband of the skirt, but didn’t particularly want to go into the changing area to check it, but I didn’t see any other way, and quickly darted in, checked the size, and got out of there. I wore a size 10. Then I realized that there were about twenty styles! As I was nosing around trying to understand the labels, I felt a tap on my shoulder which almost sent me straight into the air. When I turned around, I saw Mrs. Grant standing there smiling at me!

"I’m sorry to startle you Diane. It looks like you could use some help. Are you looking for anything in particular?" I couldn’t deny it, and nodded my head yes. "Women’s clothes are all over the map as far as sizes go Diane. You almost have to try them on to make sure they fit. What are you looking for, and what size do you need?"

"Mom told me to buy some jeans. My skirt is a ten, so I figured a ten, but this one says 23, that one 34. I haven’t found one that says size ten on the tag!"

"I know it’s confusing dear. That’s the waist size. Here, let me help you."

Mrs. Grant showed me how the sizing worked, then handed me three pair of slacks to try on. Only one of them were jeans. I knew what she wanted me to do, try them on. But as I looked over at the changing area I saw several girls go in, and got a little edgy. Being dressed in a store is one thing, trying on clothes something else altogether. "Come on Diane, I’ll go with you" Mrs. G said, and walked with me to the booths. The first pair of slacks fit me real well, the second, the jeans, a bit loose in the seat but fine everywhere else, and the third were just terrible. I kept the two that fit, and headed for the cashier.

"Diane" Mrs. G said, "why don’t we get a soft drink? I want to talk to you."

As we sat at the small table she wanted to know why, if I was doing this just to help my Aunt Mary, did I have to baby-sit as a girl? I told her that our neighbors had just moved in, and had seen me as a boy only a few times. They did not know that a girl named Diane didn’t live there, until she met me. By the way mom acted around her, she inferred that I was a daughter, and asked me to baby-sit. I like Mrs. Grant. Most of the kids do. Her entire family about two years ago. Her husband, a daughter and two sons had been killed when a freak storm and high winds dropped a high power line, pole and all on their car. After that she seemed to adopt kids. The ones that needed her. She became more like an older Aunt for many, if not most of the kids. We all knew that we could say anything to her, and it never got repeated. Mrs. G. is older than my mom, maybe 50 I guess. She has a few gray hairs, but she could look 15 years younger if she wanted too.

"The truth of it is that you like dressing as a girl. Isn’t it? And tell me the truth Diane."

"I never did this before they asked me to try on that wedding dress! It just happened. It’s like I have no control over it Mrs. G."

"But you like it don’t you?"

We locked stares as I tried to form the word no, but all that happened was that I nodded my head yes. I was ashamed to admit it, but she didn’t blink an eye.

"Thank you for trusting me Diane. Now, tell me what you had planned for the summer."

I didn’t have any plans. All I knew was that I had two more babysitting jobs. After that I planned on becoming myself again. Maybe work at a burger place. I saw her giggle when I said that, and sat back wondering why. When she told me I realized she was right.

"You can do that of course, but as you said, the neighbor thinks a girl named Diane, the one that has watched her kids twice, lives next door. What will happen when she wants you to watch the kids again? Could you do it as Donald? What would she say about that? And what about hers friend? The one she referred to you?" As Mrs. G. looked at me, I saw her smile. "You’re not the only boy that likes to dress as a girl, but you’re the best looking Diane. Given that you have the entire summer off, and we both know that you like to dress this way, why don’t you work with me? I have an opening for an assistant. It’s yours if you want it, but it only pays minimum wage I’m afraid."

I had an instant vision of our neighbor running and screaming full tilt, telling everyone the truth if she found out about me. It was an ugly vision. I told Mrs. G. that I would have to ask mom, which is when she told me that I would be grading papers, helping her create tests and so on. She squeezed my hand as I got up. I paid for the slacks and went straight home. When I told mom what had happened, her eyes opened wide, and I knew that she had not given one thought to the fact that our neighbors only know me as Diane. For mom, it had been a lark when she first saw me dressed as a girl. She had gotten caught up with my trying on the wedding dress, and had simply denied to herself the fact that I was a boy. I had always known that mom had wanted a boy and a girl, but during my birth something was damaged, and she could not have any more children. For 16 years she had only a son, me. But the minute she saw me dressed as a girl, her long held desire to have a daughter rose up and bit her on the brain. She does have a boy and a girl now, but unfortunately, they are both me.

Mom sat on the couch as what I told her sunk in. Then, all at once, I saw that shifty little smile she has grace her face, and I knew exactly what she was going to say. I was right.

"Since you have the whole summer off, is there any reason you can’t keep dressing as Diane?"

"The guys. If they see me like this…"

"What guys? You’re the only teenager on this street, and if you’re working with Mrs. Grant, you won’t have the chance to get into any trouble. Will you?" Mom kept her eyes on me as she added the final dart into my denial. "Besides, we both know that you like dressing this way, so why not try it, for the summer anyway?"

I didn’t answer her, but went to my room and put on the jeans. As I looked and saw the loose seat, I also saw my skinny hips. From the waist up I was okay, but from there down, unless I wore a skirt, I looked like a boy. Having one of my rare moments of inspiration, I took the jeans off, went to the linen closet, and grabbed those pads mom had used on me the first time. I shoved one into the dimple on each side of my butt and one on each hip. I pulled up the pantybrief and put the jeans back on. I had one more adjustment to make, slid the jeans down and made it. The next time I looked in the mirror I had hips, and better, the Y shaped groin that girls have. The denim hugged my butt tightly and gave me a feminine shape, which merely confirmed what I already knew. I was going to become Diane for the summer, and I was looking forward to it.

I touched up my makeup and went to see mom. I did not actually say I would remain as Diane, she could see the changes for herself, and knew what I had decided. That afternoon I removed some of my boy clothes to make room for my other wardrobe, then fashioned a vanity of sorts out of two old end tables we had in the basement. Mom contributed a curling iron and some makeup along with a mirror that I hung on the wall. Over the next few days About all I did was learn how to put on makeup and brush out my hair, creating several different looks. I watched the kids next door and the kids down the street, both times without any problems, and I was very relaxed about dressing as a girl now. I had even tried wearing my makeup very thin, all without any problem. Mom told me that less is more, meaning the less makeup I wore the more natural I would look, and she was right.

Mom sent me to the store, and while I was walking up and down the aisles, I saw an ad for a pantybrief. "For the woman that needs help" it said, and pictured a pantybrief that was clearly padded. I grabbed one of the flyers from the rack, finished my shopping, then as soon as I got home, I showed it to mom, and asked her if it would be better than what I was using. She said probably not, but did agree to buy three more of those oval pads for me. By adding another pad on each side of my butt and one in front, right over my manhood, I would have a much rounder figure, and definitely look more like a girl. She went out and bought them that day.

One of the things I liked to do was roller skate, and since it was Friday, mom asked me if I wanted to go with her to the rink. I knew that when mom was younger, she had won several medals roller skating. While I was very confident when I was out of the house, dressed as Diane, I knew that a lot of the kids I go to school with would be there, which made me pause and think about it. "Nobody else has figured it out Diane, and they won’t if your careful." Given that I knew she was right, It didn’t take me long to say yes. For the obvious reasons I had planned on wearing the new jeans, but mom said no.

"You skate too well for jeans honey. A girl that skates as well as you do would wear a skating skirt. I think I might have one that will fit you. Let me check."

Not only did she find a skirt that fit me, she also found the matching panties, the tights, and the boot covers! I tried on the skirt, found that it fit really well, then got undressed so I could take a shower and redo everything. This would be a huge step for me, and the very last thing I wanted was to be found out by someone I went to school with, boy or girl! After all the time that had passed, my skin was almost perfectly smooth. I used a razor to touch up a few places, then shaved even though it didn’t feel like I needed it. I sat naked, on the towel at my ersatz vanity, and did my makeup, keeping it thin, yet I used the foundation and powder, some pale green eye shadow with gray highlights, black eye liner and mascara. Peach blusher with a dusting of rose over that, then I set my hair in three rollers before I got dressed. Knowing that everyone would be able to see my groin every time the skirt flipped up, I was extra careful to hide things, then put my panties on. I put the pads under my panties, adding the new ones, then pulled on the pantybrief. Then came the tights. Thicker than pantyhose, they still made my legs shapely. Over all of that I pulled on the white Lycra skating panties. I did not wear the waist nipper, but I wore one of the new bras mom had bought me. With the enhancers I had a nice bustline, and under the pullover top, nobody would see anything anyway. The white top was stretchy, so when I tucked it into the skirt, my breasts were outlined just right. All white, like a virgin I thought. The boot covers went into my purse after I slipped on my white flats.

Brushing out my hair I let it fall into place, sort of a Pageboy I guess. Gold button earrings, red lipstick and some perfume, a last check, and I was ready. I walked out of my room and waited for mom in the kitchen. Usually she doesn’t fix herself up, but when I saw her I wondered why. At 37, she still had a knockout figure, and with makeup, was beautiful. She also wore a skating skirt although it looked a tad tight. With a smile she grabbed her skates in one hand, her purse in the other, and we left the house. The rink wasn’t crowded when we got there, and we found a seat so we could put our skates on. I added the boot covers, and as soon as mom was ready, we hit the floor. I do alright in the dances, but mom won her medals in freestyle, and while that was some time back, she still had the gift. I watched her as she gained speed, then did a triple axel, landing perfectly! I was content to just skate around the rink. After a while others started to arrive, and as they joined us on the rink, I saw some kid watching me, no matter where I went, I saw or felt his eyes on me. I felt like a bug stuck with a pin. When I mentioned it to mom, she merely laughed and told me to get used to it!

"Diane, honey, you’re a pretty girl! Of course the boys are going to be watching you! All pretty girls learn to get used to it, and how to ignore it. If he asks you to dance, it’s your choice to say yes or no. Now relax and quit worrying about it."

Some help she was. Up to the point I agreed to dress this way all summer, I had the option of saying that I was doing this for my Aunt Mary. Once I stepped over that line, I had admitted that I liked being a girl. Now mom had simply told me to get used to it! I wasn’t sure that I could ever let a boy dance with me. The music slowed, then the lights went dim and an announcement came out that it was a couples only. I joined mom on the bench to watch. That did not last long as the kid that had been watching me came over and asked me to join him. I really wanted to say no, but mom pinched me and I stood up in surprise. He didn’t hesitate. He took my hand and led me out on the floor. As we circled the floor, I caught mom’s eye and shot her an angry look. Lost in my anger, my feet seemed to do what they wanted, and I soon found myself doing the Monterey Tango. The boy I was skating with was really quite good. He effortlessly guided me through the steps as I let the music take hold and I began to forget how I was dressed. He said his name was Ron, I told him mine was Diane. He was taller than me, and not bad looking, for a guy I guess.

He took me back to the bench when the music stopped and drifted away. Twice more that night a different boy asked me to dance, and by the time we got home, I was really confused about things. I was a boy, and boys don’t dress like girls. Worse, they aren’t supposed to like it when someone, another boy, wants to dance with them. Yet I quickly began to like it, just like the way I found out that I like to dress as a girl. I wanted to mention it to mom but was afraid too, so I kept it to myself until I could figure it out. On Monday morning I dressed very carefully for my first day at work. I wore the gray skirt with a white blouse and low black heels. I pulled my hair back with a hair band, did my makeup, and drove to the adult education center. Mrs. Grant was waiting for me, one of the first things on her agenda was to get me an ID card with my picture and name on it.

"You’ll need it here Diane. After today they will lock the doors so nobody can get in without ID."

That’s how I got my very first piece of ID with the name Diane on it. The work was easy and I quickly figured out what Mrs. Grant didn’t tell me. I also began to use mannerisms that were very feminine, which Mrs. G commented on. And twice helped me with. By the end of the first pay period, two weeks, I had quit worrying about being found out. I had become a girl in every way but physically. I tried on the wedding dress one last time before the seamstress said she was done. Mom was standing there waiting for me to change clothes when the woman asked me to remain as I was. In her hand was a beautiful gown! It was royal blue with a sweetheart neckline, sleeveless, and had a bow at the back.

"What is that dress for?" I asked, knowing in my heart that Aunt Mary had decided to have me in her wedding. There was no other reason for a gown like that. I looked at mom, saw her smiling and nodding her head yes, and took the dress. Once I had it on, the woman marked it up, then told me it would be ready in two weeks and handed me a scrap of material the same color and type.

It was to match the purse and shoes of course, only I didn’t know that. Mom told me once I was dressed again. Mary was out of the hospital by then, so I went to see her after work the next day, my ID badge still clipped to my blouse. I forgot to remove it. Mary was not surprised to see me still as a girl, and when she saw my badge, she told me that she was glad that I finally found the real me!

"What does that mean?"

"It means" Mary said, "that now that you have admitted how much you like being a girl, you seem to be even prettier and more confident than before, and taking a job as a girl only confirms it. That’s why I asked that you be fitted for the blue gown. I want you to be my Maid of Honor."

"Me? Your Maid of Honor? But what about that other girl?"

"Beth was promoted then transferred Diane. I knew about two weeks ago. Your mother and I simply waited and let you become the girl that you have turned out to be before we told you. Obviously, it was the right decision."

"But this is only for the summer Mary, I mean, when I go back to school, I’ll be myself!"

"Right. In the mean time, why not do this for me?"

My Aunt Mary is more like a close cousin. At age 24, there isn’t that much age difference between us, which is why I rarely use the term Aunt with her. Both of us knew that I did not want to give up being a girl, now or in the future, yet my manly pride refused to let me say that. As a girl, I’m all foam and latex, spandex and perfume hidden under a mask of makeup and newfound femininity, yet no matter how much I might want things to be different, I would always be a boy in a dress. Mary never let her eyes drift away, holding my gaze, and I was locked into an unexpected turmoil. All at once I saw the futility of being a girl and had the urge to go home, change, and never wear a skirt or dress again. Mary took my hand in hers, then smiled.

"There is no reason you have to give up being a girl Diane, none at all. It’s been almost a month since you started this, and just look at you! I can think of many girls that would kill to look as good as you do, and you want to quit?"

"But the other kids, they’ll…"

"They will what? Know that you’re a boy? How? Are you going to tell them?"

"Well, no, but…"

"Didn’t you tell me that Mrs. Grant hired you as her assistant? Has anyone at the school ever given you any reason whatever to think that they know you’re a boy?"

"Well, no, but…"

"You’ll have to stop saying that Diane. If Mrs. Grant hired you, then managed to get it past the school board, doesn’t it stand to reason that she could make sure that you could attend school as a girl?"

"Yes, but…"

"Diane, honey, answer this simple question for me, and tell me the truth, not what you think I want to hear. Do you want to continue to live and work as a girl, yes or no?"

As the simple question permeated through my brain, I knew what I wanted to say, but if I did, then I would forever have to live with the answer. My tongue flicked out and drew in the taste of the strawberry lipstick, the scent of my perfume found my nose, and my hands went to my waist. The soft touch of the skirt pushing against my pantyhose all combined into one answer. "Yes" I said, even as I felt a tear on my cheek. I wasn’t sure if it was sadness or glee that caused it. Mary took my hands and drew me to her. As her arms went around me I felt a sense of relief. I had crossed another bridge. I had now said out loud that I wanted to not only be a girl for the summer, but from now on. Mary asked me to be her Maid of Honor once again, and this time I said yes. Then Mary told me she had lots of clothes that did not fit her any more, and I could have them if they fit me. With a new vigor, she and I went to her spare room where we sorted through a lot of things, most of which I tried on. I had three full baskets of clothes when I went home.

By the time I got home I had convinced myself that Mrs. Grant could make it possible for me to go to school as Diane, and planned on asking her on Monday. Mom helped me put away the clothes, and as we were doing that, I casually told her that I was going to continue as her daughter, forever maybe. You can imagine my surprise when all she said was "I already knew that dear." Why is it mothers always know before we do? That weekend I went roller skating by myself, now filled with a greater confidence, and knowing that I would never be a boy again. I met and danced with two new boys, but Ron was there, and he dominated my time. I was willing to let him, and became the girl I knew he wanted me to be. When he walked me to my car, he caught me by surprise when his lips touched mine, yet I did not pull away. It was very thrilling to have him kiss me, as it confirmed just how feminine I had become.

On Monday morning I wore a suit that Mary had given me, all pink, I wore it with a gray blouse and black shoes. I took extra time to look as good as I could when I asked Mrs. G to help me. I found Mrs. Grant in her office and went in, closing the door behind myself. The only time either of us shut the door was when we were discussing something private, so she knew something was up, and I think she knew what. without any preamble, I began by just saying what I wanted.

"Mrs. Grant, I want to attend school in the fall as a girl, and I want to know if you can help me."

Her smile put me off for a minute, then she sat back and began to giggle!

"Is it that funny?"

"No dear. I thought you knew! When you hired in as my assistant, approved by the board by the way, I told them that you would be my new student advisor in the fall. Then I called Marion, who is a close friend, and asked her to change your records. As far as anyone knows, you have always been a girl! Goodness Diane, I thought you knew that!"

I was shocked that she had done that without telling me, but grateful. I hugged her, then went back to work. In two months I had gone from your average teenage boy to teenage girl, all without any real struggle on my part. First my Grandmother and mother, then Mary, now Mrs. Grant. As her student advisor, I would be exempt from gym, Home Ec, and other classes that I would have to take otherwise. Gym would be the worst thing I could imagine. Another week went by, then I went to my first Bridal shower, and got a taste of what the Maid of Honor has to do. There were about twenty women there, all with gifts of course, and I wrote down who gave what so Mary could do the thank you cards. Not one person there even gave me a second look, even though I felt really out of place. But it was a fun party, and all of the women seemed to accept me as the replacement Maid of Honor, especially when one of the girls told me that the best man was 17.

After everyone had left, I asked Mary why she didn’t tell me about the best man. Her answer was that it would not have made any difference, and since I would only be with him a few times, it wasn’t as if they were setting me up. Then she added, "Although he is really cute", "and a real stud" added mom. Gee, with help like this I don’t think I’ll need to work at it! At home, at dinner time, mom gave me a pill for me to take, then told me to "take one a day with a meal", and I said I would. Purple, I didn’t give it another thought and popped it in.

The rehearsal was held on Saturday at four, and I wore a skirt and blouse with white heels. As mom and I walked into the church, I saw Mary with her guy. They were talking to someone who had his back to me. Mom and I went up to them, and the guy turned around. It was Ron! We both smiled when we realized who we would be with at the wedding. I caught a glimpse of Mom and Mary trading looks and a quick smile. What did they know? At the rehearsal dinner, Ron and I sat together, and without the noise of the roller rink, he was very funny, attentive, and like mom said, a stud. I had thought so when he kissed me, but was afraid to even think like that. Now that I had made my commitment, I didn’t let such thoughts bother me. I held his hand under the table while smiling all during dinner. I didn’t think anyone knew.

At home mom asked me what I thought of Ron, and when I didn’t answer, she asked me why I let him hold my hand all night long if I didn’t like him. All I did was grin and go to bed. My gown was fitted one last time, and I took it home, along with a matching corselet and panties. Mom and I had the shoes and purse already, so I was ready, or so I thought. The wedding was scheduled for five in the afternoon, and I was sure that I had plenty of time to get ready, but mom threw a wrench into that when she told me that I had an appointment with all of the other girls at the salon. According to her, we would all get our hair styled, nails and makeup done, all by noon! It would be my first foray into a salon, but I was looking forward to having my hair styled by a pro, and longer, harder nails would be a plus since my own nails are so brittle. It took about two hours, and I was delighted with the results. Mom and Grandma were also smiling, but didn’t say a word.

Once I had taken my bath and had the panties on, I struggled with the new corselet, the new nails making it so different to fasten the hooks up the front. Mom came in and once again I was compressed into the garment. Both of us were panting when she was done, but I certainly had a very feminine shape. Rolling the stockings up my legs, I attached them to the garter tabs and adjusted the tension, then made sure that my growing bustline was on the best display I could manage. Since I had the sensation of tingling in my breasts first started, I had grown to almost a full A cup, which pleased me to no end, but I had no idea why I was developing now. Maybe it was because my mind had told me I was a girl now. Stepping into the shoes, I reached for the dress and slipped it over my head very carefully, then zipped it up. Perfect. Adding bright red lipstick, perfume and the rhinestone necklace and earring set, I knew, or rather felt, right down to my core that I never looked better. Smiling I grabbed my purse and walked out of my room.

Mom looked simply wonderful in her gown, a sea of shimmering rose colored chiffon and satin. With a smile we left the house for the church. Ron was already there, and almost ran to the car when he saw me. With a bright smile, I let him take my hand and walk me inside. Later, as I walked down the aisle on his arm, I remembered the words Mary said to me, when she told me she could hardly wait to see me in my own gown, meaning a bridal gown. At the time I dismissed it, but now, holding Ron’s arm, walking down the aisle with him, I began to wonder myself.

The wedding went off without a hitch, and Mary looked spectacular in her wedding dress. At the party Ron was at my side the whole time, and I caught him looking down my dress twice before I made it easier for him to see my charms more often. As things started to grow quiet, he and I stole away and found a quiet spot on the patio. When he took me in his arms and kissed me, I did not struggle with him, or myself. I let him manhandle me as he wished, absorbing every nuance, everything he whispered in my ear, and kissed him back. It was the next day before I calmed down enough to think in an almost rational frame of mind. I stood naked in front of my mirror and looked at myself. Small boobs that would hopefully get bigger, a narrow waist with hips growing rounder, a hairless body and smooth skin. I had a slight beard, almost a nothing, but right there, between my legs hung the obstacle to a true love life as a woman. Small and limp, yet defining me just as if I held up a sign that said BOY all over it. With a sigh I pulled on my panties and tucked things away.

Mrs. Grant had me sign a few papers when there was only a few days left before school started. Mom had told me that we would have to legally change my name in order for me to attend school, and that same week I became Diane Elizabeth, at least on paper. On my first day of school it was very nerve wracking, knowing that every kid I grew up with and went to school with was there, yet not one of them made the connection, and I managed to relax. It took a week to get all settled in, and many of the boys and girls started to pair off. As a Senior, with absolutely no experience with boys, other than Ron, I felt really awkward. The girls, unlike popular rumor, were not all sugar and spice. More like tobasco sauce and chili peppers when they thought that you were after a boy they wanted for themselves. I tried to stay out of that mess. Mrs. Grant arranged for me to be her student advisor as promised, and began half day sessions the next week. By the time Christmas arrived, I had blossomed out to a full B cup, and I now had a 36/24/36 figure. Although I was a woman in every way but one, and knew that Ron and I could not play slap and tickle, I had heard some of the girls talking about the way they kept their guys happy, and realized that I could do that too. But would I?

I did not find out until New Years eve when Ron took me to a fancy restaurant, then later, to a party. On the way home he parked the car, and for the first time I let his hand inside of my blouse, then my bra. The sensation was like no other I ever felt, and in a fit of passion, I did for him what so many of the other girls were doing for their guys. During the following year, I dated Ron, worked for Mrs. Grant, baby-sat and went to school, the whole time becoming more and more feminine, until mom told me that it was time for me to see a doctor. That’s when I had to tell her about my development. I had taken great pains to make sure she did not see me naked, and I assumed that she thought I was still padding out. When I told her, it all came out in a rush, and at her insistence, I showed her by stripping naked for her. All she did was tell me to get dressed!

The doctor examined me, then told me that the hormones I had been taking had acted so quickly because of my age. He said that I had interrupted my puberty and developed just like a normal girl. He sounded pleased. Mom also looked happy, but I wasn’t taking any hormones! Not that I knew of anyway. Two words popped into my mind. Orange Juice. Mom had been spiking my orange juice without my knowledge! I didn’t mind at all, I just wished she had told me.

"When she turns 18 we can complete things, but for the moment she’ll have to stay just as she is."

That is how it turned out. I graduated and turned 18 a month later. Ron was eagerly trying to get into my panties, and I really wanted to let him, but of course, that was impossible. It only made me look forward to the moment the doctors rectified the problem. They did, and about four months later Ron and I spent a wonderful afternoon playing explore. That Bridal gown Mary mentioned? It looks a lot closer now.

 

© 2000

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