Barbie's Diary

by Angel 6

Part 2

 

September 26

Dear Diary.

You are now my best friend. There is no one else I can write about the weird things that is happening to me. I told you about yesterday. Step put me in trainer diapers and tights and a girlie undershirt. When she did it, I didn't care. I mean my school uniform was over it, and that was still a boys uniform. No one would know, would they. I didn't even think about until I came to school.

But when I was in school. I went past a trophy case. I could see my refection in the glass. Om my gosh, my butt was so big. I stared at the reflection for a few minutes thinking if anyone else could see the big butt. My best friend Philip laughed and told me that I look nice, even with my long blond hair.

We had maths afterwards. I hate Maths. I really do. In the middle of the class, I could feel that I was getting wet. I could feel a tear coming to my eye. I tried to wipe it away and control my self from crying. I didn't want Philip or anyone in the class thinking I was crying like a little girl.

But I was a little girl. Look at my hair. It was down to my shoulder, I always had long hair. I was wearing tights and a girls undershirt. I was even wearing a pull up because I could no longer get to the toilet on time. What was happening to me. It cant be normal . It cant be normal that I didn't even say no to these things that Step was putting on me. It cant be normal that I didn't tell her that I wanted to be a boy.

But do I want to be a boy. Maybe I like the attention that Step is giving to me. I miss my Mum so much that I really don't mind her fussing over me. I don't mind being treated like a little girl. Well, I didn't when it was at home. Now I am slowly turning to a girl at school.

Dear Diary, when I am started writing this, I could feel the tears once again. Now I am crying like anything. Without even knowing it, I have pit the pacifier in my mouth. I have decided that I will no longer be a girl. I am a boy. I will say no to Step and I will get dad to help me. But how, he is always at work.

Did he just get married so someone will take care of me? Does he really love me? Does he not see what is happening?

I have to go to sleep now.

 

September 27,

Hi Diary

Sorry about last night. I went on and on didn't I? I am so sorry. Just who else do I tell about these problems. A lot has happened today. I don't know where to start.

When I got up I was wet. Step came in and started changing me. I actually stood up to her and said that I can change myself. She is so strong that she hardly even listened to me. I kept on shouting that I could change myself and I didn't want to wear girls underwear or tights. To be honest I was in doubt about the pull up. Whats best, having a big butt or wet trousers? I suppose a pull up is.

Step didn't listen to me. She just struggled with me as she started putting the undershirt with the stupid ribbon on. However this undershirt had a drawing of the Power puff girls on it. I started to panic and thought what will happen if my mates could see the drawing through my shirt. I was not going to take any chance.

When she went to get the tights, I took of the power puff undershirt. I was screaming that I was not a girl and that I didn't want to wear girly clothes and that I can put my own clothes on. As usual, I was crying like anything. That's so embarrassing.

Step then got mad at put me over her knee and started spanking me. "Listen. When I first moved in here, I didn't want a son. I hate boys. However I loved you because I could see that you were a boy trapped in a girls body. For Gods sake you have long hair and you are so fragile, you have a girls head. Even your thingie is so small that you look like a girl. I also seen the way you looked at Philip and even your step brother Alex. You look at them with girls eyes. So get this in your head. You are a girl. You are a sissy. A Sissy that pees in her own trousers. You are a pissy sissy and I am only helping you."

My head hurt when she said this. Maybe it was because I was crying so hard. My head was spinning. She called me a sissy. She thinks I am a sissy. She said that I was a girl in a boys body. She thinks I was a girl even before she met me and she was just helping me.

I couldn't believe it. She called me sissy. And She called me diaper Barbie when my head was starting to go around and around in turmoil. I hate when she talks about my diapers. Its so embarrassing and its not my fault.

Then it hit me. What did she mean the way I looked at Philip. How did I look at him like a girl would. Did I look at him like I fancied him? Do I fancy him? I think he is hot and I like when we wrestle. But do I love him. Did Step think I was a gaybo? Am I?

I snapped out of my thoughts. Step dressed me in my uniform. I was once again a boy, but if You took off the uniform I had girls tights and undershirt on with a pull up.

Step said Go to school Diaper Barbie. I said nothing. I was mad and confused.

 

September 30

Dear diary

Its been a few days. But there was nothing to write until today. I tried a few times to stand up to Step, but every time I spoke to her that I am a boy, she spanks me and calls me names like diaper Barbie, sissy, girl, baby and once she said I was gay. I am afraid of her and I couldn't decide if she is a witch or not. I wanted dad to come home from his business trip. I needed him.

Nothing happened in school. At least that's good that no one knows that I am a sissy and I cant go to the toilet like anyone else.

However today I came home from school early, as I skipped PE (gym)

I entered the house quietly and heard Step on the phone. Here is what I heard. I will write it as I could remember it, and then you can decide Diary if I should be worried…

"… everything is going fine…. Yes he has a boy who is eleven years old… He is strange… long hair and he is small and not very developed. Hes a weakling and he cries over the smallest things… he started wetting the bed after I moved in… I think he misses his mum…. She was a bitch in school she teased me because she thought I was a tomboy… No, I told my husband that we were at the same school and didn't know each other…. If she could see what I was doing to her son now she would be sorry for the way she treated me at school…. Revenge is sweet, fun too… well where do I start. I am turning him into a sissy…. He wears night dresses and tights and undershirts… I have just bought him clothes, but he never noticed they were indeed girls clothes…. Soon he wont be a sissy, he will be a girl….. I cant wait to his first dress…. That sounds like a good ideal…. The diapers wasn't part of the plan but he wears them all the time…. And uses dummies… yes maybe he should get a bottle more….. a crib, that's going to far….. maybe….. his dad? He is always at work. He seen him in his nightdresses and didn't say a word. The only thing he said is to take him to the doctor for his bladder…. Yes the bitch can watch all this from her grave….. yes I never thought about that Ashely was also a girls name….. Well I got to go."

After I heard this conversation on the phone, I went to my room and after Step put me in a baby diaper and nightdress I looked at my clothes. She was right they were all new clothes. Tights as usual. However there were socks with ruffles on them. There were trousers with no zips in the most geeky girl colours. They were red and light blue and some were even pink. Even the jeans had flowers sown in them. My old clothes were gone.

What was the phone call all bout. Was it my mum she was talking about? Did she used to know her. did my mum tease her and This was now revenge that I was going to be made into a girl. Things couldn't get worse, or could they???

 

October 1

Dear diary

I still cant hep thinking about the telephone call with Step and whoever it was. It sounded like she was trying to turn me into a girl. At the SA´me time she told me already that I was a girl inside. Maybe I was meant to be born as a girl but somehow came out as a boy. I mean when I have these new clothes or nightdress on you would really think that I was a girl. I am so confused. Am i really a girl or am i a boy.

Today when I came home from school, Step told me not to put my nightdress on. I was still to ear the big diaper with some plastic panties, but I was to put on some other clothes. I put on the jeans with the flowers and a white ´top with strawberries and some lace. My butt looked extremely big with the diaper and anyone would have to be a blind bat to see that it wasnt a diaper under it.

Then Isabella came in the door, with her best friend Maria. She was going to sleep over. My heart started to beat faster than anything it did before. How was I supposed to survive this.

Maria looked at me and started smiling. I smiled a bit back and said i will go up to our room. I really wanted to hide. Here i was wearing girls clothes, although Step called them uni sex or something like that. I just wanted to hide in bed until Maria went home the next day.

However it didn't last that long. Isabella and maria came up to the room. Maria looked at me and said. "Why are you wearing girls clothes".

"I'm not"

"You are"

Then the worse thing happened that I could imagine. Isabella started telling Maria that I had a small thingie and that is why she thought i was really a girl. Not only this, but she told her that i peed in my pants so i had to wear diapers.

"Even though Ashley is older than me, he is a baby because he wets himself. He also uses dummies and sometimes bottles."

Maria laughed so high that she fell on Isabella's bed. I wished that the ground would swallow me up.

Isabella continued, "Hes really like my little sister"

Maria couldn't believe her ears. She laughed and laughed then stopped with a confused face. she just sat on the bed and looked at me with a funny face. It was obvious that she didn't believe a word of what Isabella told her. Then again she could see that I was wearing strange clothes and this confused her. I think she also looked at my bum and could see it was a bit big.

"Your a sissy?" she said

" NOOOoo." i said

"Your a diaper boy?"

" Stop"

"Sissy pissy" she said and started laughing. I started walking towards the door but Isabella was in the way. The next ten minutes must have been the two girls teasing me. I just sat down pretending to do homework, but of course I couldn't.

Then Maria told me she wanted to see my diaper. I of course said no way, but she kept on asking. Then Isabella told her that she was allowed to see if I was wet,

Maria asked how and Isabella explained while showing, "I don't ask Barbie, because he lies. So I just put my hand down and see if its wet. Its fun when i have cold hands because Barbie goes red in the face. Oh hes wet. I better tell Mum"

" Eww thats disgusting, don't u feel his willy?" Maria asked.

"No No. he doesn't have much of one to hold on to Remember he is my baby sister. Anyhow I have to tell mum that he is wet."

Maria laughed that i was wet. She said it proved that I was a little baby girl. Anyhow the next humiliating part came when step came in with Isabella and said that I had to lie down on the bed while she change me. I expected her to tell the girls to get out, and when she didn't, I reminded her.

"We are all girls here" she said.

For the thousandth time today, I wished that the ground would just swallow me up. As Step started to take off my clothes, I could see Maria's eyes becoming bigger and bigger. as i laid there as the day I was born. Tears started to come to my eyes and after Isabella stuck a pacifier in my mouth, I just closed my eyes. I know it was stupid of me. If I couldn't see them then they couldn't see me. Although I could hear them laughing, i just thought of everything else besides what was happening. At the end Step put me in a nightie, add I think it didn't even shock Maria. I suppose after all she seen until now she couldn't get any more shocked. I felt like a right sissy in the nightdress.

but dear Diary.... it wasn't over yet. Isabella went out into the kitchen, letting me and Maria stare at each other. Isabella came back with a bottle. She expected me to play the baby and drink the bottle. I of course said no. Then Isabella waved her brush and boasted that she spanked me a few times. I wasn't going to be spanked by two girls so I just decided to be part of their baby game. I lied my head on Maria's lap and she started giving me the bottle. As she did this she lifted her blouse and teased me saying she had no boobs so i just had to do with the bottle. I was already red in the face because a girl younger than me was giving me the bottle. Now she was flashing at me.

The i could feel my heart beating faster. I could hardly breath. I asked Maria to promise she will tell no one about this. I know it was a big promise because if it was me I would probably tell the whole world. She said she would think over it, but every time she visited.

I didn't know whether to believe her or not and I didn't want to be anyones slave. But i begged her not to tell a living soul. Deep down i knew that this meant everyone will start thinking that I am a girl and not a boy

 

October 4

Dear Diary

It was a lot that I wrote last time, wasn't it?

anyhow today was another strange day. It started as usual as Step dressed me and all that. As usual I was a girl underneath and a boy on top.

I got used to this. I was very careful to make sure that my school bag was closed so no one could see the extra pull ups that was hidden at the bottom. I also make sure that my shirt was tucked in and tied up to the top so no one could see who was was hidden below it. By now I thought that my secret was safe. Even after Maria's visit, no one teased me about being a girl the day afterwards, so I didn't think that she tole her. I suppose who would believe her

however today my best mate Philip found out. Ill tell you how it happened.

It was during break. I took my bag and went to the toilets to change the pull up. He asked me why don't I leave the school bag in the classroom. I went sort of white. I felt a bit like I was going to faint. I pretended that I didn't hear him. I pretended also not to hear him when he asked what was staking so long.

After we ate, I forgotten the whole thing. We were in the playground in the shelter area. We were sitting on the ground eating our Lunches. After lunch we were joking about how much we hated Maths. I suppose i should say that we only had out coats on, and the ground was a git cold for Philip. Not so much for me. Pull ups is good for something good.

anyhow we started wrestling. I love wrestling. I don't know why. Then after a few minutes when i was on top of Philip, he went totally silent and still. I could feel his hand rubbing my butt. I knew the secret was out. I mean he would have to be a total idiot to know that the butt was well covered. His arm started felling my butt and to tell the truth a part of me didn't want him to stop.

"Are you wearing a diaper" he asked. What was I going to say. I didn't want my best friend to start hating me.

"I can explain. I have problems. I cant get to the toilet on time and i started wetting my bed."

"Oh" he said as he continued as he rubbed my butt. "I thought you looked strange down there and you haven't been to PE in a few weeks, but I never guessed that-.... I never guessed this."

Once again i started to cry. My secret was out. I started telling Philip about it all. The nappies, the nightie, the tights and underwear. He asked what My Dad said to all this, and I said that he was never home. But he probably didn't love me anymore anyhow. The the tears flowed out. I felt like a baby, but i was so afraid that Philip would hate me from now on.

Then we sat up and he gave me a hug saying that we were still friends and always will be. He didn't know what else to say so he just kept hugging me for ages. I stopped crying and just let him hug me. I thought it was nice. i had sort of butterflies in my stomach.

The one of the older boys shouted that we were Gay. So we stopped. He just started pointing at us and called us gay and he seen us kissing, which wasn't true. After he went away told Philip that everyone will think that we were Gay

" So we know the truth. Anyhow if we were in love, we wouldn't be Gay, because you look like a girl and you dress like a girl."

I didn't know if that was an insult or compliment

Then i thought of what Step told me, that i had feelings for Philip.

No, I'm not in love with him

am i?

 

October 9

Hi

I mean dear Diary

I suppose i Can say hi.

Today Dad came home. He knew i wet the bed but he got in a fight with step. I suppose I better start at the beginning.

When I came home from school dad was there. I was so happy that he was home. I really missed him. And this time he would be home for a week and even more. You can understand why I was so happy.

Step then gave me a present. I thought at first that she was just being nice because Dad was here.

When I opened the package it was a leotard. It was black. Step mum told me to try it on. I did. Dad was outraged.

"He looks like a girl."

Step said that she bought me the leotard because i was going to start dancing. While i felt like fainting. Dad laughed as if he did not believe what he just heard. Maybe he thought it was a joke.

I shouted at the top of my voice that I was not going to start ballet. Step said "You wear nappies and like girls clothes. Do you think you are able to decide. I Don't think so"

Dad looked at me asking me was this the truth. he must be blind if he didn't know. But maybe he didn't think I liked it. I bet he must have thought I was a lost cause because i liked it.

I ran out into up to my room. I supposed it was good that my dad didn't know that in the middle of the argument that I wet myself. As I sat up in My room i heard that Dad and step argued for some time. At the beginning i was happy that he was doing it. Maybe now I will be treated normal. But then I was afraid. Could I get my bladder under control? At the end it Didn't make any difference, as I could hear that Step was putting her foot down, telling him that she knew what was best for me. Dad just became quiet at the end. He came up to my room and looked at me and rolled his eyes towards heaven. "Your a lost Cause." he mumbled.

 

To be continued….

If you have any comments or would like to chat, you can contact me on angel6@live.dk

  

  

  

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