This story is dedicated to my big sister Ally. From the moment she came into my life she has did nothing but love, teach, share and hold me when I needed it most. She's lovingly brushed my hair, patiently listened to my endless chattering, forgiven me for more "accidents" than any five year old should have, taken my hand and shown me worlds I never knew existed; and when the scaries chased me into her bed, she held me close and chased them all away. With all my heart, I wish I could give her everything she really needs, and more than she could ever want. I wish so much I could right all the wrongs she's endured in this life. Sadly, five-year-old witches wield crayons far better than magic wands, so all I can do is color this picture for her and hope it brings her joy. To you Ally, the best big sister a little sister could ever ask for. I love you. Maggie

Ps. Special thanks to the brave souls who proof my stories. They patiently and persistently go through red pen after red pen desperately trying to translate my crayon scrawls into the English language. Bless you!

 

Ally in Wonderland

by Maggie O'Malley

 

A young woman stood at the edge of an abyss. She cut quite an image in the rugged setting. Her beautiful auburn locks had been swept into an updo and with the elegant gown that adorned her slender figure, she was a Cinderella more dressed for the ball than a nature hike. Yet it was obvious this princess was in great distress as she trembled from the sobs that wracked her body. Her small hand held onto a rock outcropping that jutted out over the great void. Like her, it seemed to hang precariously on the edge. Bits of dirt and tiny rock tumbled into the darkness below, as feet and toes, bare since they'd shed their glass slippers some time ago, wiggled nervously to find footing. Tears mixed with mascara and makeup fell from her cheeks as she gazed downward; like the dirt and rocks at her feet, they too disappeared into the black below.

Ally was no stranger to this place. It had been her sanctuary since the day the "little rock hound" had stumbled upon it searching for shiny stones. She had been but a child then, although some would argue that at 18, she was hardly removed from childhood now. Many times she had came to this place. Usually it was to think, to plan, to dream, to allow herself tears she could never cry in the outside world, and quite often to find comfort from her pain in a place she felt brought her closer to the Goddess. Normally she would leave here refreshed, and ready once again to take on a life that seemed to have been stacked against her at birth.

This was not the first time she had stood at the edge of the abyss and watched pebbles disappear into the seemingly bottomless void, but it was the first time she was truly prepared to join them. At that moment she was feeling many emotions: frustration, despair, anger, hopelessness, love, regret, but not fear. No, despite the fact she was but inches away from certain death, she held no fear. Death just seemed like a blessed release now. Fear was for the living.

Her chest heaved as anger ran from her heart to her hand. Slowly her fingers clenched together and the anger became a shaking fist hammering her hip. She had every right to be angry, and many targets for her anger. Few would begrudge her cursing the Goddess for giving her such a tremendous cross to bear and denying her many of the things her sister's would be given as a birthright. The anger pounding at her side could easily be directed toward parents that weren't fit to have children. Her mother was a heartless woman, who had birthed her child and then deserted it. Her father was a bitter man who blamed Ally for his wife's departure, and as a result, took out those frustrations in mental and physical abuse on his own child. Growing up, she had been chastised, teased, and tortured by the other children who sensed she was different, and then set out to punish her for it.

Yes, she could justly throw stones at the world and the heavens, but as she stood on the brink of self-destruction, it was herself she was angrily sorting out.

The sobs eventually downgraded to a soft cry and the words flowed to match the tears. "What were you thinking? How could you have been so bloody stupid? Did you really think you could get away with it? You know you can't love him. You can't love ANYONE and you sure as hell can't let ANYONE love you, least of all Andy."

Her features softened as she spoke his name. It hung on her lips like a slow kiss that left her breathless and wanting more. "Andy...my sweet, beautiful Andy...I can't love you...but oh Goddess I do, and I have from the moment I laid eyes on you."

Ally's voice trailed off as her mind drifted back to the night when it all began. She was center stage again, and thunderous applause filled the theatre. The play had been a smashing success that night and Ally had performed her role as the young transsexual perfectly. Of course, how could she not? You might say it was a role that she'd spent her entire life preparing for. Yes, as incredible as it may seem, the vision of loveliness graciously accepting the audience approval was genetically a male. At a slender but shapely 5'6, the auburn-haired beauty had the body of a teen goddess and the voice of a songbird.

Save for one physical blemish, the offensive male appendage now tucked neatly away, Ally appeared to be the same as any other lovely young woman. On the inside, there was no such blemish to separate her from her genetic sisters. Her mind, her heart, her soul, her wants and dreams mirrored those of most any young girl, and like any young girl she dreamed of the day her handsome prince, her soul mate, would come for her. She had no idea where, when or even if she would find him. She feared that perhaps the same curse that would deny her the feeling of carrying a child within her, might also deny her the feeling of being held in the arms of her true love.

Her wondering and her fears would both be put to rest that night as from the shadows off stage; a young man stepped into view. When Ally saw him, she knew this was the one, her handsome prince, her eternal soul mate, and his name was Andy.

The 6'5, blond haired, broad shouldered Yank swept Ally away the first time he locked his baby blues on her. She stood utterly breathless as he walked on stage in accordance with tradition to present her with a rose for her inspiring performance, but there was no play acting by either of them when he pulled her into his arms and kissed her passionately. Their scene upstaged the magic that had been created there earlier that night, and brought rave reviews from those still in attendance.

Ally had never recovered from that kiss, and never really wanted to. She had nearly needed to be dragged off stage by her fellow performers, as she was unable to leave Andy of her own accord. While the others in the dressing room were buzzing about the night's performance, Ally sat at her makeup mirror, staring intently at the rose, still lost in the kiss and in the man who had given her both. Once she finally emerged, she found her handsome prince leaning by her door, waiting for her with a smile. Her eyes met his and he offered his arm. She returned his smile and took it willingly.

From the theater they walked and chatted for hours, sharing coffee and life stories. The air off the water made for a cool night, but Ally never took chill as Andy's arm pulled her close and she snuggled warm against him. It was nearly dawn before he left Ally with a last kiss. She wouldn't let him walk her to the door and after hearing about her father, he understood why, but he promised to be there the next night with a rose and a kiss. Ally promised to be waiting, and both were as good as their word for the run of the show.

The show finally ended its run, but their fairy tale production was just beginning, and for the next few months they were nearly inseparable. Anyone seeing the two of them walking hand in hand past the discos, sipping coffees at a club, or snuggled together in the park, would think them just to be any young couple in love. And in every way that truly defines love, they shared it.

Ally's days were filled with the anticipation of seeing Andy, her evenings were spent trying to fill herself with him, and then, when night threatened to chase the dawn away, she went to her bed alone and dreamed he joined her there. When she woke, she wanted to ring him immediately, just to be sure he was a dream come true and not just a dream.

He was just too good to be true. Young, handsome, VERY handsome, a genuine California beach boy! He was gentle, funny, and rather well to do. From what Andy had told Ally, his parents had moved from San Francisco several years ago to oversee the operation of their European holdings. Andy for the most part, downplayed his wealth and social standing. To Ally it didn't matter whether or not he had two schillings to rub together. The love they shared was riches beyond wealth.

 

What truly amazed Ally the most about Andy was how loving he was, loving of HER! He was a young man who could have any girl in England fall at his feet, and yet with a world of women to choose from, he'd picked a poor Devonshire Dumpling in need of a plumbing refit. Andy could see the disbelief in her eyes each night he met her, so he would greet her with a kiss that left no doubt in Ally's soul he wanted her, all of her, just as much as she wanted him. His love for her buoyed her own confidence in being a woman and helped her deal with the abuse her father routinely laid on her, not to mention what she took from the boys who liked to play, "Catch and Beat the Poof" as she tried to survive the daily back and forth from college.

 

For months she had been walking on clouds, but then it all threatened to come crashing down around her heels as Andy finally popped the question. Marriage? No, but nearly as scary for Ally. Andy asked her to meet his parents. He'd been hinting about it for some time but hadn't pushed Ally as he could sense her fear. He'd told her he wouldn't pressure her, but it was obvious his parents were beginning to pressure him. Naturally they were becoming quite curious about this mysterious young that girl had stolen their son's heart. They literally demanded to meet her. They couldn't be put off much longer, and in all honestly Andy was eager for them to see the girl who owned his heart.

 

Andy had been searching for a perfect opportunity to present his love and he was sure he had found it. His parents were hosting one of those posh garden party affairs. There would be a lot of people there, but Ally was used to performing in front of large crowds. Andy thought it would be far better for her to make a brief appearance with him among the many guests, than for the four of them to spend an entire evening staring uneasily at each other. He also couldn't imagine a better entrance for Ally than to be in fancy dress, on his arm, and outshining the beauty of his mother's prize roses. He was sure her physical beauty would mesmerize all in attendance and that with her warmth, charm, intelligence and the rest of her inner beauty, would capture his parent's hearts as she had his own. He was sure that having gained their initial approval, they would learn to understand and accept the rest given time.

 

Andy was confident, Ally was less so, and had tried to protest but those blue eyes, that smile, and his promise that he would never leave her side, had her laughing and saying yes by the nights end.

 

The next morning she went straight away to see her best friend Elsa. Elsa was "gender-challenged" just as Ally. The birth defect they shared had made them kindred spirits. The deep friendship they shared since primary school made them like sisters. When Ally told Elsa the news, both girls shed happy tears and then quickly dried them as a shopping trip was clearly in order. With Elsa at her side, Ally spent most of the day browsing through thrift stores for a second hand gown, occasionally having a weak moment and muttering, "How on earth did I let him talk me into this? I must be out of my mind!"

 

Elsa hugged her best friend and laughed as she teased her, "You'll get no argument from me on that one love. I've always thought you a bit daft anyway, but if you're going to go crazy, it might as well be that you're in love and with someone like your Andy. Goddess, he's brilliant!"

 

Ally blushed, giggled, and then prodded her friend to keep looking through the racks in hopes of finding the perfect gown, for the not quite perfect princess. The party was three weeks away, yet with saving, shopping, borrowing and seamstress work Ally knew it was still going to be cutting it close. Andy had offered to buy her a gown, but her pride would have none of it. This was something she had to do for herself and for Andy.

 

Fortunately for Ally, Elsa not only helped her find the gown and do the seamstress work, she also let Ally spend the night at her flat, so she could help her with final preparations, and most importantly so Andy could come call for her there. Ally couldn't very well have Andy call for her at her house.

 

Not that her father would really notice his "son" descending the stairs in a ball gown. He rarely paid any attention to Ally save for slinging his fists or his bitter verbal abuse at her.

 

No, it was because she didn't want Andy exposed to it should her father decide to start a row. Ally knew Andy wouldn't stand for that, and like the handsome prince he was, he would defend her honor. So, rather than miss the party because she had to either bury her father, or wait for Andy to get out of jail, she gladly accepted Elsa's gracious offer.

 

With Elsa's help her gown was ready by the day of the party. Finally, a full two hours before Andy was to arrive, she was as ready as she would ever be. Ally had changed her hairstyle a half dozen times before finally settling on a more formal updo to compliment the gown and occasion. The 'Elsa/Ally original' gown was form-fitting and featured curves no boy's body was ever meant to have. Along with her hair and makeup, it made her look every bit a confident twenty and less like the frightened teen she truly was.

 

Ally had performed on stage a number of times and before some fair-sized crowds, but this command performance had her shaking as no stage fright she'd ever known. There was far more at stake then favorable reviews in the school paper. Purely and simply, her future with Andy was at stake. She knew this had to go well. She couldn't live with failure because it would mean living without Andy.

 

She had paced the floor, nearly wearing out the thinning carpet in Elsa's flat when the buzzer went off, alerting her to Andy's presence. Elsa played mother hen, and shooed her sister off to the bedroom before greeting Andy. Ally stood at the door listening to Elsa and Andy exchanging pleasantries as she uttered a quick prayer for the Goddess's intervention in making this fairy tale come true.

 

When Elsa knocked and opened it slowly, Ally stepped out, but could not look up to meet Andy's eyes at first. This was the best she could be and she was afraid it still wasn't enough. Andy quickly crossed the distance between them. Taking one of her hands in his, he used his other to gently raise her chin and lift her gaze to meet his. Ally's frightened eyes were met with sparkling blue ones filled with overwhelming love, compassion, and deep respect for the woman who held his heart. A reassuring smile crept across his face and he squeezed her hand gently. Ally's lip quivered and she wanted to say something, anything, but she couldn't.

 

All she could do was look up at this smartly dressed, gentle and loving prince and think one thought. "Oh Goddess, he is the most beautiful man in the whole world, and he wants me. He wants me!"

 

Andy's admiring words broke the silence, "Oh Ally, I think...no, I am sure...you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I love you so."

 

Somehow Ally managed to squeak out an, "I love you too," before tears threatened to undo Elsa's makeup magic.

 

Andy, seeing tears welling in his love's eyes, knew nothing else to do but use his own magic to quell them and pulled the princess into his arms for a kiss. Ally found herself literally floating on air, as both her feet were nearly a foot off the ground, and her toes were curling beneath her fancy slippers. Reluctantly, he set her down, pleased to see her beautiful smile once again gracing her full lips. Then he presented her with a corsage and offered her his arm. She took it greedily and held on to it tightly. Elsa ran up and gave Ally a quick hug, then fixed the lipstick that had been slightly damaged by the prince.

 

The warm glow on Ally's face told Elsa that the kiss had been well worth the smudge. She teased "Cinderella" that the magic would end at midnight after which she would turn back into an English pumpkin.

 

Andy laughed as Ally stuck her tongue out at Elsa in a very un-princess-like fashion before Andy ushered his little pumpkin out the door and into his car.

Elsa didn't know at the time just how soon midnight would come for Cinderella, or how Ally's fate could be far worse than her carriage being turned back into a pumpkin or losing a glass slipper.

 

Andy's parents had considerable wealth, but in a land known for its tradition and breeding, money alone is not admittance to high society. Andy's parents had overcome their biggest handicap. They were dreaded Yanks, Californians, no less, but they had fit in well to the social circles and were considered adopted Brits by most all those who knew them.

 

Ally's eyes went wide as Andy downshifted his car when they passed through the imposing black iron gates to his parent's estate. As the mansion came into view, Ally knew she was way out of her element. While she had been lead actress in a school play, this … this was the starring role in a Broadway production. Her fear and doubts became stronger as they pulled up and a smartly dressed man waited to park Andy's car for him. Andy threw him the keys as he went round to Ally's side, opened the door and took her gloved hand. He gently lifted her out and she took her place by his side. Seeing and sensing her heart pounding in her chest, he whispered softly in ear, "It's going to be alright, love. I promise, I won't leave your side."

 

Ally smiled weakly and squeezed his arm a bit tighter. His words and his closeness calmed her a bit. Taking a deep breath she prepared herself for her audience with the "King and Queen". Andy led her past the house to the impressive gardens behind it. The scene was breathtaking. Flowers, trees, sculptured hedges and a beautiful fountain were the setting for this afternoon's event. Ally's pulse quickened as she saw a large contingent was already in attendance, and that she was only moments away from mingling with some of Britain's bluest blood, not to mention Andy's parents. She was Audrey Hepburn playing a transgender Eliza Doolittle on the arm of a young and dashing San Francisco style Sir Henry Higgins.

 

Andy pulled her closer, winked and whispered, "Shall we?"

 

It was more of an announcement than a request as he quickly ushered his love into the breach. Ally passed through the crowd with a frozen smile on her face, and a death grip on Andy's arm as she briefly chatted with dukes, duchesses, and some of England's most influential people. She half expected the Queen Mum to make an appearance before it was all over. At least she did meet one other guest there who looked as frightened and lost as she did, A young blonde girl who appeared to be about Ally's age chatted her up over her dress and contemporary music. She even winked at Ally and whispered in her ear that Andy was a real keeper and that they made a lovely couple. Ally took an immediate liking to her new friend, but was whisked away by Andy, just barely getting to say goodbye.

 

It took Andy about thirty minutes to work himself and Ally through the crowd and over to his parents, or as Ally thought of them, "the Royal Family". As soon as Ally laid eyes on Andy's father, it was obvious the apple hadn't fallen far from the tree. He was heavier and older but still a tall and handsome king. He grinned at Andy, and Ally saw where her love had gotten that impossibly charming smile.

 

Andy's mother was at her husband's side like any good queen, and was chatting with another woman when Andy's father directed her attention toward their son and the girl who had to be the mysterious Ally. Andy's mother was slender and about Ally's height. Her coloring still carried remnants of being a California sun goddess, as did her blonde hair. When she turned to meet the approaching pair, Ally found Andy's blue eyes in her. They were slightly more rounded and framed in longer lashes, but were still that unbelievably beautiful blue.

 

Ally's gloved hand trembled slightly as she extended it to meet Andy's parents. Andy's father smiled at her and took it gently. Like his son, he had the magic touch and immediately her hand went still. She then turned to the queen and smiled nervously at her.

 

Andy's mother smiled back warmly and then pleasantly surprised Ally by very unceremoniously hugging her tightly and whispering into her ear. "Relax Allyson, this is not the Spanish Inquisition, dear. We just want to meet you."

 

Ally pulled back with a much-relieved smile on her face and Andy's mother nodded her approval. The foursome chatted a bit, with both of Andy's parents commenting on Ally's lovely gown, which she accepted graciously. The conversation was light and somewhat easy for Ally. Neither parent pushed her for personal details and for that she was grateful, but she did try to give them something, picking and choosing selective truths, rather than telling any out and out lies.

Andy's mother could see the young girl was still nervous and a bit overwhelmed and sought to calm her as best she could. "Andy?", she asked. "Have you given Allyson a tour of the house and grounds?"

 

Andy shook his head, and his mother smiled. Motioning Ally over to her side, she smiled and whispered. "If you can just bear with us until this 'Dog and Pony show' is over, I'd love to take you on a tour of the house and grounds. It'll give us a chance to talk, and you look like you need to talk, dear. So please... don't let Andy whisk you away until after all the stuffed shirts leave, which should be shortly after they've exhausted our champagne and caviar."

 

Ally giggled as she pulled back from the older woman. She really liked her. She had Andy's gentle demeanor and natural charm. Her lighthearted humor brought a smile to Ally's lips and the young girl couldn't help but feel drawn to her. Yet her invitation for a tour and a talk had Ally fighting to keep herself from trembling. Once alone, the protective mother could rip her to pieces, asking Ally questions she didn't have honest answers for and then size her up as gold-digging tart, whose love for her son was only as large as the boy's inheritance. Even worse, it could very well be she'd unmask the faux princess at first sight and would call the local constable to have her carted away for the various laws she must be breaking.

 

Yet, she couldn't fear this woman or her invitation. She instinctively knew she could trust her, maybe even enough to trust her with the ultimate truth. She would just have to wait and see how it all unfolded. Ally nodded and offered softly. "I would love to ma'am."

 

Andy's mother smiled lovingly, and pulled Ally back to her for one last bit of girl talk, "Now, I suggest you get Andy over to the buffet table, or better yet, onto the dance floor, because if you stay here much longer my husband is going to ask you to dance. Don't get me wrong, he's a wonderful man, but Fred Astaire he's not, and I have the aching toes to prove it."

 

Ally and Andy's mother giggled, which earned her puzzled looks from Andy and his father. Shrugging their shoulders, they attributed it to girl talk, and discretion being the better part of valor, wisely decided to not ask what they probably didn't want to know about. Andy's mother then shooed the two kids off toward the buffet table, tempting Ally to at the very least try the desserts. She promised they were positively decadent.

 

Ally nodded and then with Andy's gently arm directing her, was spirited away from the king and queen. Andy nuzzled her neck as he drank in the heady aroma of her perfumed hair.

Gently he whispered, "Ally you were super! I could see how much Mom liked you, and Dad even commented on how nice you were. See my love, we're almost home."

 

Ally smiled and sighed. "Maybe, Andy, but its not midnight yet."

 

Andy squeezed her tightly as he led her over to the buffet tables, which were plentifully covered with delicacies from around the world. But Ally's stomach balked at the thought of food. However, Andy was insistent she at least try something, and finally talked her into a tiny slice of heaven called Death by Chocolate, Mass Extinction. Ally knew immediately that this had to be the decadence that Andy's mother had spoken of. She made a mental note to ask her about that recipe and then refused anything else save for a sip of tea.

 

The band was playing a soft tune. It was a bit old style for a pair of teenagers, but nonetheless, alluring. Andy could see the want in his love's eyes and taking her hand her bowed gallantly before her and asked for this dance.

 

Ally blushed and giggled, and then in the spirit of moment, curtsied gracefully and extended her hand toward Andy adding, "I would be honored, my lord."

 

Those blue eyes of his smiled at her and she felt herself melting into his arms even before they'd stepped onto the dance floor. Sadly, this dance wasn't to be theirs, as Andy's father came up and laid a hand on his son's shoulder.

 

Smiling at Ally he begged forgiveness for this intrusion, "Ally please forgive me for interrupting, but if you will allow me, I need to steal Andy away from you for a moment. I promise I will have him back to you shortly."

 

Ally really didn't want Andy to leave her, and he could see that in her eyes. He offered to stay, remembering his promise to her, but she quickly sent him off with his father, insisting she would be fine. Andy gave her a light peck on the cheek and then disappeared into the crowd. Suddenly Ally felt almost naked. Without Andy there to hold her up, she suddenly felt like a boy in a fancy frock, with his willy showing.

 

She felt as though every eye was on her, and in reality most had been, but not for the reason her fear was telling her. She was every bit the beautiful young princess in their eyes, and the attention she was drawing was for her beauty and not exposed boyhood. Had Andy been there he could have reassured her, but when he left, he took her confidence with him and she could feel the anxiety growing.

 

She could also feel the pressure in her bladder begin to grow as well. The ladies room became an immediate necessity and perhaps once there, it could also be a safe haven. She could hide out there, repair any damage to her make up and then return. Perhaps she could even find the young girl she'd met earlier and they could go together. Hopefully, by the time she returned, Andy would be waiting for her at the dance floor and all would be well once again. Feeling a bit more confident she went in search of her friend and the facilities.

 

Realizing whether or not she found her friend, she was definitely going to need to find the ladies room, she decided to ask one of the staff working the party for directions. She tapped on the shoulder of a young gent carrying a tray of champagne, and when he turned, she took a horrid fright. She knew this boy and by the look of surprise, and then the wicked smirk that crept across his face, he recognized her as well.

 

Ally's heart nearly leapt from her chest, and her first instinct was to run. She had good reason to run. This was Tom, the leader of a gang of schoolboys who routinely chased her to and from school. He and the angry lot he ran with didn't much care for a "girly-boy" like Ally, and they'd left her with bruises the few times they'd caught her. Had they caught her at night, they might have left her in an alley for dead.

 

Ally shook as he looked her up and down and sneered wickedly. She could barely believe that Tom would ever work to make an honest pound, let alone get one working such a class affair. She also knew he rarely did anything without the rest of his pack members, so she was relatively sure the other two musketeers were here as well. Perhaps she'd been so caught up in playing princess she hadn't noticed them, but she was noticing now, and noticing the familiar hate held in this boy's eyes.

 

Setting the tray down Tom looked her up and down. "Well, well, well, look what we gots 'ere. Playin' dress up again are you? Tryin' to take some chap for his money 'eh, and what a right nice place to do it, too. I've already nicked three wallets me self."

 

So much for Tom trying to make an honest living, she thought. She knew he had to be up to no good and she wanted no part of it. Ally shook her head and tried to back away, but he grabbed her arm tightly.

 

"No needs to run off "Cinder-Fella".

 

Tom increased the pressure on her arm, making sure Ally wasn't going anywhere and then kept his voice low as he continued, "Listen you sick li'l bugger, you and I got business and this is the way its gonna go, or so 'elp me I'll yank that bloody frock off you and show the lot of 'em what you're really made of. You understand me "girly-boy"?"

 

Ally nodded as her eyes searched the crowd, begging to find Andy returning, but her prince was nowhere in sight. Her captor turned up the pressure, nearly bringing Ally to her knees.

 

"Now look...I've got these fat wallets and watches but I can't get 'em out of 'ere. Lucy, you know good ol' Lucy? Well she was gonna be me mule and pack our take out of 'ere, but the silly bitch got scared and ran out on me. I'll deal with 'er later but for now you're gonna take 'er place an 'elp your ol' friend Tom out."

 

Tom was no "ol' friend" and she had no intention of being a part of anything that could hurt Andy or his parents.

 

Finding courage she didn't realize she had until now, she returned his glare and harsh words, "You must be crazy if you think I'm gonna help you. You want to steal, you can bloody well carry it out yourself."

 

The young thief wasn't going to put off by Ally's brave talk. Her defiant attitude only increased the anger within him and he vented back at the young woman.

 

"Now you know I can't do that. Imagine these blokes wantin' to check me to see if I've nicked their bloody silver when I leave. We can't 'ave that now can we? Oh...but they'd not check a fine "lady" like you, so you'll put 'em nice and neat in your 'and bag and meets us after the party. And I knows you'll do just what ol' Tom 'ere says for you to do or so 'elp me I'll show the lot of 'em right here and now just what kind of "lady" you really are. You got's dat LOVE?"

 

Tears welled in Ally's eyes, both from the fear and the excruciating pain she felt as he threatened to break her arm. She couldn't be a party to stealing, but she also knew Tom was cruel enough to start a commotion guaranteed to ruin any chances she had of making a good impression with Andy's parents. She searched the crowd for Andy.

 

"Oh why did he ever leave?", she thought.

 

But her prince was still nowhere in sight. Thankfully, a savior did arrive, as one of the "stuffed shirts" in attendance was thirsty for more champagne and spied the closest waiter. Seeing the tray of chilled bubbly, he pushed in between Ally and Tom, trying to get a glass. When Ally felt the pressure released from her arm, she made her break. Pulling free, she pushed past both the boy and the man and disappeared into the crowd. She couldn't think, and she could barely see as her tears mixed with her mascara and nearly blinded her. She couldn't cry out, for no words would come. All she could do was run, and not look back.

 

Soon, she'd made her way through the crowd, and found herself standing at an entrance to the house. Hoping she might find Andy, she quickly ducked in. The spacious room was empty of people and she passed through it and into a hallway. She listened, hoping to hear Andy's voice but she was surrounded by silence. Seeing a door she pushed it open gently and the soft lavender colors and rounded mirrors told her she'd at least found the ladies' room. Slipping past the door, she leaned against it to close it and then set the lock.

 

Finally, her energy was gone, and she slid to the floor and collapsed in a pile of tears. Now she could think, and she didn't like the thoughts that were coming. There was no telling what that evil boy and his mates would do. Ally had seen and felt their cruelty first hand. They'd have no druthers about exposing her. They might even say she had nicked the wallets and they'd caught her red-handed. Either way, when they caught her, and sooner or later they would, they might just 'do the world a favor' as they would say, and finally kill her.

 

And what about Andy's parents? What would they think of her now? Not only a transsexual, but also a petty thief to boot. How could she face them now? And what about Andy? Yes, Andy loved her, but did he truly realize WHAT he was loving? They'd both been caught up in a fairy tale since the day he'd given her that rose, but it wasn't real, and neither was she.

 

Ally buried her face in her hands and sobbed. Once the tears subsided enough for her to stand, she took hold of the washbasin and pulled herself up. Staring into the mirror she caught quite a sight. Dark mascara mixed with tears ran down her cheeks giving her the ultimate gothic look. Her hair had come partially undone and had fallen in front of her face. She pushed the hair back and shook her head in disgust. She looked a fright. No matter what, she couldn't face anyone like this, and she also wasn't thinking clear enough to make life-changing choices. The best thing she could do for herself, her Andy and his parents was just to leave and go back to Elsa's. Maybe she could sort it all out there. She'd ring Andy later and try to explain it all then.

 

Ally splashed a bit of cool water on her face, took a deep breath and then slid the bolt from the door. Almost immediately it pushed open, and she was knocked back to wall. Three familiar lads forced their way in and a badly shaken Ally stared up at them from the floor. The last one in shut the door behind them, but failed to bolt it. The other two went straight for Ally and picked her up from the floor. Tom sneered and slapped her. One of his henchmen punched her in the stomach and down she went again. Ally rolled up in a ball and sobbed. This brought laughter from all three of the boys and Tom quickly jerked her back up like a life-sized rag doll.

 

He slapped her several more times and then dragged her over to the mirror and shoved her face in front of it. A small trickle of blood ran from her nose and already her lip had begun to swell. "Some woman", he laughed and his minions soon joined him.

 

His eyes narrowed as the hate poured out of him. "You stupid little boy-bitch! You mucked up the whole works. We had to chuck the lot of it, watches, wallets and all. Didn't even have time to lift a single quid out of 'em. You got's any idea of what it took to get us in posing at servers? You're gonna pay for all of it."

 

Ally cowered and closed her eyes, sure she was in for the beating of her life, or maybe her death, but her captor had other ideas. When she didn't fall from the force of the blows she opened her eyes to find him smiling wickedly at her.

 

"Charlie 'ere tells me you been arm and arm with ol' Andy. Never figured him to be queer, but...aye...what can you say? Bloody rich yank's no bedder than you. and I think the whole world ought's to know he's nuttin but a poof. Wonder 'ow much his mum and dad would pays to keeps something like that quiet? Maybe...we oughts to call 'em in and finds out."

 

Ally's eyes went wide. Her own father had beaten her before, and worse. She was prepared to take whatever abuse they could dish out, but she'd rather die than have Andy or his parents hurt on her behalf. Yes, she and Andy had planned to tell his parents, but not now and not like this. They'd be crushed and there was no telling how bad it would go for Andy. Her eyes flashed with anger.

 

"Damn you, do what you want with me, but you leave my Andy and his family alone!"

 

Tom laughed and mocked her, "My Andy is it? Now ain't dat touchin'. Fancy yourself as a real girl do ya? Gonna marry 'em are you? Your ol' man gonna give you away is he? Like to see you find a church that'd bless the likes of you. And what about kids? Figurin' on be a mum, and givin' Andy some fine strappin' sons are ya? Now that'd be a right nice trick with what you got 'tween your legs."

 

Thrusting his hand forward to drive home his point he grabbed Ally by the crotch. Ally, now pushed beyond the breaking point, slapped him hard across the face and in doing so, her nails grooved several deep scratches along his cheek. The young man let her go and reached up to feel his stinging jaw. When he pulled his hand back he was met with blood, his blood. This enraged the beast and he came toward Ally. Reaching in his back pocket he pulled out a blade and snapped it open.

 

"Stupid bitch. You cut me! Oh now you're gonna bleed and I knows just where to cuts!"

 

His eyes drifted down to her crotch and Ally backed up to the wall as he took another step closer.

 

"I'm gonna 'elp you out. You wanna be a girl. Then you won't be needin' this."

 

The other two quickly flanked their leader as he held the knife, preparing to send Ally out of this world minus a piece of flesh she never should have had when she entered. Ally braced herself against the wall and closed her eyes, wondering if the next time she opened them, would she finally be face to face with the Goddess.

 

Fortunately for Ally her meeting with the Goddess was cancelled by the shouts of a woman entering the bathroom.

 

"What's going on in here?" she fired. "You leave that girl alone! Go on...get out of here or I'll call the police!"

 

Police was a dirty six-letter word to these boys, and they wanted none of that. Spitting out, "This isn't over, bitch," Tom and the two others ran past the woman and out the door.

 

Ally staggered toward the sink, relieved, but in shock. Ally's timely savior came up to her and noting the girls condition immediately told her sit down while she went to fetch help. Ally waved off the woman's kind offer of assistance saying thank you, but she would be fine; however, it was obvious she was anything but that. The older woman obviously recognizing this poor beaten girl as the same vision of loveliness she'd seen earlier on the arm of the hosts' handsome son, offered her assistance once again.

 

"Love, you're all in. Let me go get Andy or his parents. You're Andy's fiancιe aren't you?"

 

As much as she wanted Andy to hold her and make all this go away, she knew he couldn't, and she also knew she couldn't face him, not now, maybe not ever. Pushing past the woman, she bolted from the ladies room without a word and fled through the house, exiting out a side door. Once outside, she ran across the grounds and then disappeared into the woods adjacent.

 

She wandered aimlessly for a while, finally collapsing near the trunk of a large tree. Curling up into a ball, she rocked and sobbed until she was spent. Thirty minutes went by before she struggled to her feet. She was torn. Part of her wanted to go back and find Andy, or stay there until he came for her, while the other part wanted to run away and spare Andy the misery of a life with someone like her.

 

She knew she loved him, that wasn't the issue. The issue was, did that love give her the right to ruin his life? She didn't know what to do, but she couldn't stay, and she couldn't go back. She desperately needed to think and keep moving. She started walking once again, hoping sooner or later the woods would give way to a road.

 

The woods finally did open to a road. At first it was unfamiliar to her, but as she began walking it a ways, she realized she knew it well after all. Somehow she must have gone much further than she dreamed possible, for this road led by her old sanctuary. She traveled but a few hundred feet further, and there, nearly hidden by the thick foliage was the old familiar path that would lead her to the abyss. Needing to talk to the Goddess perhaps more than any other time in her young life, Ally pushed back a branch and disappeared into the thicket. She knew she would find her answer at the abyss.

 

Twenty minutes later she'd arrived at the abyss. Now, for the last hour she had been standing at its edge, contemplating her life, past, present and hopes for the future. Piece by piece she had taken it all apart. She had no family to speak of, at least in the truest sense of the word. She might as well have never been born. She didn't exist at all to her mother, and she existed only as object of abuse for her father.

 

She did have a few friends, but most were like Elsa and herself, souls cruelly imprisoned in the wrong body. When it came right down to it, they were a hopeless lot who hid and sneaked about, trying to blend into the gay community, and trying to keep from getting their brains bashed in by others like Tom who felt it was their duty to rid the earth of "sick bastards" like them.

 

The highlights of her life had been playing female roles at the school theater, and the glow she felt every time a shopkeeper called her Miss. She was 18 and playing make believe girl, but what would she do for an encore? More importantly what did she really have to look forward to when the magic was gone and she couldn't pass anymore? Who would want her? Who would care if she lived? Who would care if she died?

 

A single name came to her like the charging white knight it belonged to, "Andy". Yes, Andy wanted her. Andy would care. Andy was the one person on this earth who truly loved her, but was she woman enough to love him back?

Her tears took control again and another round of sobs shook her body. Finally they subsided and she turned her face toward the heavens.

 

"Alright damn it, yes....yes...oh Goddess I do love him. When he holds me, and smiles at me I see the love I feel for him come back to me, and I am so full. Suddenly my world's not wrong anymore, because in his eyes I'm not wrong, and I've never felt so alive. Oh Goddess, he tells me I'm beautiful and he makes me believe it. He fills today with joy and gives me hope for tomorrows I never dreamed possible before. I know I've found my soul mate. He's everything to me, but...but...sometimes everything just isn't enough is it?"

 

Her knees threatened to buckle from sheer exhaustion. She gasped another breath and began again.

 

"Oh Goddess, he gives me so much, but...but...I will never be able to give him what he deserves and I must have been daft to think I ever could. You know he took my heart the day he took my hand and gave me that rose. He kissed me and I awoke from a life long slumber to discover I was more woman than I dreamed possible, and for a while I believed that was enough. I believed in the handsome prince, the beautiful princess and happily ever afters, but real life isn't a fairy tale is it Goddess? Sooner or later it destroys fairy tales like Andy and I have lived. It's like a relentless dragon that no brave knight can slay. It's a clock that rang midnight on this Cinderella, and now she is nothing more than a stupid bloke in a princess frock."

 

Ally shook her head and sighed, "Goddess, Tom and his lot are cruel bastards. I know that, but...but he was right about one thing. I'll never be a REAL woman for Andy, no matter what I feel like inside. No matter how much I love him. No matter how much he loves me. It won't be REAL because I'M NOT REAL and sooner or later he's going to realize that. Sooner or later he's going to tire of telling half-truths and outright lies about his "girlfriend." Sooner or later he's going to want a woman he can meet at the altar and call 'wife'. Someday he's going to want the children I can never give him and he's going to hate me for that. Oh Goddess I cannot live to face that day. I cannot!"

 

Frustration and despair threatened to consume her. Her sanity, like her slender form, teetered on the edge of a dark abyss. She desperately needed answers to questions that defined her very existence.

 

"Why have you done this to me Goddess? Why would you put this girl's heart in such a prison? What could I possibly learn from being trapped this way? The meaning of pain, frustration, self-hate, anger, and hopelessness? They are lessons learned, trust me. I get a refresher course every morning when I stare at my naked body. If you're wanting me to know what its like to feel unloved and unwanted, I am reminded of it every time I look into my father's eyes. If you want me to know what its like to feel disgust, hatred, and pity, you need not worry, I've seen it many times in the eyes of those who pass me on the street. If my lesson is to know envy, want and pain unimaginable, I know them well too, for they are pounded into me every time I see little girls playing in the park, or a beautiful young woman, pregnant with child, walking hand in hand with her love. Please Goddess, please, teach me no more. I have learned enough!"

 

The young woman dropped her head to her chest and watched more tears disappear into the darkened void. The darkness seemed to call to her. It offered a coolness to quench her raging fever. It offered sleep to a soul too weary. It offered a blessed release from this life's imprisonment. Knowing she had the power to end "school" with a single step forward, momentarily calmed the young woman and again she sought out the Goddess.

 

"Goddess I'll accept all that you have taught me as somehow necessary, even if I don't understand why, but Goddess why bring me Andy? Why tempt us both with what you know we can't have? Why let us love each other when you know it can never be? There's no lesson to be learned in that, only cruelty. Oh Goddess, do with me what you will, but I refuse to ruin Andy's life, and that's exactly what I'll do if I stay with him. He deserves a woman, a complete woman who can return his love in every way. Goddess, you are a woman. Surely you understand why I love him, and yet why I have no choice but to let him go. If he has me, he will lose everything. I...I can't let him do that. The price for our love is too high. "

 

"But what to do now?" she thought.

 

She knew she could never return to Andy. She couldn't go back home. It was only a matter of time before either her father or some 'Tom' beat her until they finally killed her. She could stay with Elsa for a bit, but she'd only return to Andy if she did. If she was anywhere on this earth, sooner or later she would return to Andy, and she couldn't let that happen.

 

It was all too clear now. She couldn't have a life with Andy, and there was no life for her without him. In her heart, she knew there was only one thing left she could do. She leaned over a bit further. Just another inch or two and she would disappear like the pebbles that had left before her.

 

Making her farewell speech to the Goddess, Ally begged forgiveness, "Oh Goddess I know by taking this life before its time, I forfeit not only it, but the all the others to come. I am prepared to accept that, but please Goddess, please, all those souls who were destined to be my future children, please don't let them die with me. Please let them have life through another. Please take care of my babies."

 

Ally wiped the tears from her eyes, as she wanted to at least meet death with more courage than she'd lived this life. Taking what was sure was her last breath, she let go of the rock and leaned toward the abyss.

 

She admitted her defeat as she prepared to meet the Goddess, "Forgive me Goddess, I lost my courage, I lost the battle, I lost myself."

 

She leaned forward to embrace the dark abyss, and suddenly a voice called to her. She almost expected to hear an angry Goddess's voice from the void, scolding her child for coming home before she was called, but this voice was soft, sweet, and childlike, and strangely coming from behind her. She was still inching toward her death when she turned her head to find the voice had a smile, and a beautiful little girl attached to it.

 

"Hi! What's ya lookins ats?", the little one asked innocently as she wiggled fingers at Ally.

 

Ally, torn between the depths of her despair and the shock of finding she now had audience, scrambled to try and keep her footing, motioned for the child to stay back. Her distraught mind was slow to get words to her mouth and it took a few more seconds to verbalize a warning. The curious child didn't give her those few precious seconds as she quickly covered the distance between her and Ally and then leaned over to see what the abyss held.

 

As a result, the dark void almost took them both. The child was a featherweight, but even her few pounds were enough to make the treacherous footing give way. The little ones' eyes went wide and she screamed as she felt the ground disappear beneath her. Ally, finally awake from her daze, grabbed the falling child with one arm and slid down to her knees. She frantically clawed at the ground, desperately searching for something to latch onto as she was slowly slipping down toward the abyss. By the grace of the Goddess, she found an exposed tree root, and grabbed it tightly. Praying to the Goddess for strength, she began pulling herself and the child back over the edge.

 

Once her upper body was back on top, she pushed the child up and over to safety and then finished the climb herself. Once on her feet again, Ally wanted to drop back down and thank the Goddess for her intervention. She also had a few questions for this mysterious little girl who had appeared out of nowhere and nearly joined her in the afterlife. She was going to start with something simple like, what is your name? But when she saw the child trembling after her brush with death, she knew questions could wait. Ally scooped her up and held her tightly. Carrying her over to the base of the tree that had loaned the life saving root, she rocked the child until the little one started to calm.

 

Seeing dirt had fouled and tangled the child's pretty long blonde hair, Ally reached over to the purse she'd left at the base of the tree, and pulled out a brush. Gently and lovingly she began working out the tangles and restoring the child's locks to their luster. The brushing seemed to have a very calming affect on the child, as she began purring like a cat being groomed. By the time Ally had finished, the child was smiling up at her again with sparkling true blue eyes that of course, reminded her of Andy.

 

The little girl hugged Ally tightly and kissed her on the cheek. "I wikes gettins my hair bwushed. Mummy does its fors me ebery night."

 

Ally smiled back at the adorable imp, "Yes....I can tell you like getting your hair brushed. I heard you purring."

 

The little one nodded and pointed her finger to her chest. "I knows! Mummy saided dat too and dats why her calls me Kitten, but...but...my weal name is Mag...I means Alice! My weal name is Alice!"

 

Ally giggled at the animated girl. Extending her hand forward she offered her own introductions. "Hi Alice". She'd hadn't missed the child's slight stumble at giving her name, but decided to play along at least for now.

 

Alice eased her hand into Ally's and then shook it as the young woman winked at her, "I'm Ally and its nice to meet you, but you seem awfully young to be out wandering in the woods alone."

 

Alice shook her head, and then held up nine fingers at the young woman. Counting them one by one, she giggled as she pulled the last one back in. "I is dis many years old. I is eights now, but...but...I used to be fives ya know."

 

Ally giggled and then nodded, "Yes, I can see. You are quite the big girl now, but even a big girl can get lost. You're not lost are you Alice?"

 

The young woman's praise made the little one's chest swell proudly and Ally was quick to notice. She was also quick to notice that Alice's physical appearance matched the eight years she claimed to have, but her speech patterns and actions seemed more reminiscent of the five year old she remarked of having once been. Ally didn't really get much chance to dwell on it as her new friend starting chatting again.

 

Pointing at Ally as she spoke, "And...and...I know lones neiders Ally cause I wiff you!"

 

Her finger then drifted over toward the abyss that had almost swallowed both her and Ally up. "And...I no losted cause dats da wabbit hole."

 

Ally's eye went wide as the child's words lost her.

 

"Rabbit hole?" she asked.

 

Alice sighed frustratingly and explained. "Da rabbit hole! Dat's where's da rabbit wented down cause hims was late and den I gots to follows hims down dere for da venture cause I is Alice, Alice in Wonderland!"

 

Ally nodded knowingly. The child was referring to the Lewis Carroll fairy tale, "Alice in Wonderland," about a young girl named Alice who went down the rabbit hole and had a wonderful fun-filled adventure.

 

"Yes Alice, now I understand," Ally added with a smile.

 

Alice smiled back at her and then took a long look at the smiling child before her. This "Alice" certainly did look like she had stepped out of the pages of the timeless classic. Her long blonde hair had been pulled back by a lovely blue bow that matched both her eyes and the darling pinafore she modeled. White stockings and black Mary Janes completed the ensemble for the very convincing fairy tale tot.

 

Obviously, Alice's mother really encouraged her child's imagination, right down to letting her dress the part, but no child five or eight should be roaming around the woods unintended looking for "rabbit holes". Ally opened her arms to Alice, and the child returned to their safety. "Alice", the young woman cooed softly.

 

"That's not a rabbit hole over there. It's a very, very dangerous place. Definitely not a place for a little girl to be playing. How about we go find your mummy, cause I bet she's probably looking for you right now."

 

Alice sighed and shook her head, "Ally, Mummy no wookins for mees. Her knows where's I at. Hers always knows where's I at cause her gots magic, and...and...when I gets big wikes hers I gonna habs magic toos."

 

Ally hugged the imp tightly. She had never had a mummy like her new friend Alice did, but she knew mothers, the kind who loved and cared for their children, and they did have a magic. It was how they always seemed to be able to bring a smile to their child's face and chase away the tears and the scaries. It was how they instinctively knew they were needed long before their child's cries could be heard. It was all the things that only a mother could do and fix. It was "Mummy magic". Ally was so happy Alice had mummy magic in her life, and her heart ached as she knew she would never get the chance to work mummy magic with her own little girl.

 

Ally sniffled back a tear and forced a smile, "Well...maybe we ought to go back and find her anyway. We don't want her to think you wandered off and got lost do we?"

 

Alice shook her head and then pleaded, "But...but...Ally! I tolded you, Mummy knows I is here's. I spossed to be here's cause...cause I no losted. You is!"

 

Ally's eyes grew wide as she pulled back slightly and gave Alice a puzzled stare.

 

"Me? I'm not losted, errr....I mean I'm not lost Alice. Why...why would you think I'm lost?"

 

The child sighed and whined, "I hearded you when you was lookins downs da wabbit hole. You saided you was losted, or dats you losted someting, so I here's to helps you finds it."

 

Ally's turned and stared quietly out over the abyss again, her mind trying to recall her last coherent thoughts before she had nearly leapt to her death. Yes, those had been her last words. Obviously the child had heard her crying, and then wandered over. Ally closed her eyes and said a quick silent prayer to the Goddess, so glad that the child hadn't seen her jump to her death or follow her down the "rabbit hole."

 

Tears ran down her cheeks as she pulled the little one back into her embrace and rocked her tightly, unable to speak. Alice, like the kitten she was nicknamed after, purred softly and enjoyed the closeness.

Finally, Ally was able to find her voice again, and she whispered softly into Alice's ear, "Honey, I didn't lose anything down the "rabbit hole."

 

Alice pulled back and smiled at her. "I sure gads you didn't Ally cause I tinks it's a long, long ways downs to da boddom of dat hole."

 

Ally wiped her eyes as she giggled. "Yes....yes I think you're quite right, so I don't think we need to go looking down there anymore okay?"

 

Alice nodded enthusiastically and added, "Otay!" Her exclamation point being a kiss on Ally's cheek.

 

Ally smiled big and returned her kiss three-fold. The child giggled and then posed her next serious question, "But Ally if you no losed nuttins down da hole, den is YOU what's losted?"

 

Ally kept the child in her arms as she leaned back against the tree and sighed, collecting her thoughts, and wondering how or even if, she should explain her troubles to the little princess she held. She looked into the child eyes and could see the concern the little one had for her, and it so touched her heart, she had to at least tell her something.

 

Choosing her words carefully she began. "Well Alice, I honestly don't know. Maybe I have lost my way. Goddess knows I sure feel lost."

 

Alice hugged Ally and then smiled at her. "No worries Ally. I helps you no be losted no mores. I pwomise."

 

"Thank you Alice, but I really don't think there's anything you or anyone can do to help with this kind of lost," Ally added with a sigh.

 

The child's eyes flashed and smile spread across her face. "If I had magic powers wike Mummy, I could waves my hand and takes you home and then you be losted no mores, but...but..."

 

The smile that had came quickly faded just as fast. "But...I no bigs enuff yets to habs magic wike Mummy cause...cause my spells no works wight. I twys weally weally hards but I keeps messins up. Mummy saided I no louds to does spells no more after I turned a mean ol boy into a fwoggie. I tolded hers it was an axidents, but...but...I still gots in twoubles after her turned him back."

 

Ally put her hand to her mouth to hide her giggle. The frustrated look on Alice's face was priceless. It was almost as if she believed she really could turn boys into frogs. It was obvious the child had a vivid imagination, but sadly, Ally's problems were very real.

 

"Alice, I know you want to help, but I don't think magic, not even "Mummy magic" can help with the kind of lost I am."

 

Alice nodded but she wasn't about to be discouraged, "Ally, eben if I no cans does magics, I still can helps you no be losted no mores. I bets I cans."

 

Alice rubbed her nose as she thought a minute and then the smile returned, "Ally maybe your mummy will use her mummy magic and come finds you and take you home."

 

Ally shook her head and sighed, "Umm...I don't have a mummy, Alice. She's gone."

 

Ally's words were true. The woman had been gone from her life for some time and while she had been Ally's mother, she'd never ever been her mummy.

 

Alice frowned and hugged Ally tightly. She couldn't imagine not having a mummy. Saddened but undaunted she pushed on. "Ally does you gots a daddy to takes cares of yous at your home cause maybe hims will comes finds you."

 

Ally bit her lip, unsure of how to respond. "Well...I don't think daddy will come looking for me Alice, because ummm...I am a big girl now and daddy's house isn't really home anymore. I'm not so sure I even had a home."

 

The truth was, her childhood home had never been home and if her daddy had ever come looking for her, it was to beat the hell out of her. She was definitely better off homeless.

 

The little girl scratched her head and then another thought came to her, "Ally, Mommy says home is where's your heart is. Maybe if you knows where's your heart is den you will knows where's your home is and...and...den you won't be losted no mores, sees? So Ally, does you knows where's your heart is?"

 

Tears threatened at Ally's eyes again as she knew where her heart was, and where it had been ever since that night on stage.

Her mind filled with Andy's presence as she fought to find words and a smile for Alice, "Alice I know where my heart is, and I wish my home could be there too, but I can never go there."

 

Alice sighed and then frowned. "How comes Ally? Don't you members hows to gets deres?"

 

"Yes, I know how to get there, but I can't go," Ally answered.

 

"It is too fars aways Ally?" asked the child.

 

"No, that's not the problem, see its complicated and..."

 

Alice didn't understand words like complicated and cut Ally off before she could explain, "Is dey anybody at dis home dat loves you and wants you deres?"

 

A bit flustered the young woman tried to field the child's fast-coming questions. "Well, yes Alice, there is. There is one person who loves me very much, but..."

 

"Well don't you loves dem back?"

 

Ally blew out a breath, "Yes Alice I love them back, but..."

 

The little girl cut her off again and shook her head. "I no unnersands Ally. If you knows hows to gets home, and...and its no toos fars way, and umm...dey is somebody deres who loves you and...and...you loves dem back, den how cans you be all losted? Don't you wanna goes home and bes wiff dem Ally?"

 

Ally had been bested by the babe. Her child's logic was inescapable. It was all so simple to the little one, and yet so very complicated for Ally. The want for her home, for her Andy and the life she could never have overwhelmed her and she pulled Alice in to her arms and cried.

 

"Yes Alice, I do wanna go home, I do! But, I just can't."

 

The little girl snuggled with Ally and then like a pint-sized version of her own mummy, she sought to comfort her new friend, "It's otays Ally. No cwys. I knows what you is spossed to does now. Mummy saided dat if I ebers gotted lost or weal sads or didn't knows what to does, dat all I gots to does is cose my eyes and tinks of hers and she will comes gets me, and fixes eberyting! Sees Ally? Dats all you gots to does, tinks of da one who loves you wikes my mummy loves me and I bets dey will come gets you, and...and....takes you home and ebery tings will be happily eber afters likes da faiwy tales says."

 

Ally hugged and kissed the little one, too innocent to know that real life isn't like fairy tales, and sadly there are very few happy endings.

 

Alice looked at her with pleading eyes and then a voice to match, "Peas Ally, peas try. I knows it will works. Please....you just gots to trys it. Otays, pleeeeease?"

 

Ally's own heart was already broke. She couldn't bear to see the child's broken by her refusal, so she reluctantly gave in. Alice hugged her tightly and then wiggled away from her as she told Ally to close her eyes and tinks bouts da person her loves most and to keep thinking until they came for her. Alice made her solemnly promise to not open her eyes until she heard a special voice.

 

Ally agreed, and then leaned back against the tree. She closed her eyes and Andy returned to her. It was the first time she saw him …and then their first kiss. She smiled as she tasted it again, and then slowly she began to drift through all they had shared over the last few months.

 

She was still lost in her memories when she heard a piece of dead wood snap beneath the weight of someone's shoe and then leaves rustled as if branches were being pushed aside. Thinking her little friend was growing tired and perhaps running off to her mummy, Ally turned toward the direction of the sound, but didn't open her eyes.

 

A voice called out to her, a voice she couldn't possibly be hearing, and her eyes fluttered open to confirm the impossible was possible, for there, not ten feet from her stood the one who held her heart, the one person who truly loved her. Somehow, someway he'd found her. Andy had come to take her home.

 

Andy breathed a sigh of relief as he saw his love open her eyes. Ever since he'd headed down this path to her, he'd feared the worst and when he saw her eyes closed and her body still, his heart had nearly given out. He wanted to drop to one knee and thank this Goddess that Ally always spoke of so highly for keeping his love alive until he could find her.

 

Ally stood up and braced herself against the tree. It took all her effort to stand, as she was as weak kneed as a newborn colt. Andy' eyes were locked on hers and his heart ached as Ally's pain was etched on her bruised and mascara stained face like the blood and dirt that defiled her once beautiful party gown. He had far more questions than he'd gotten answers for concerning what had transpired at the party after he'd left Ally, but those could wait. All he wanted to do now was get her into his arms, and bring her home. He quickly began closing the distance between them.

 

"Oh Ally, thank Goddess I found you. I...I was almost out of my mind. I was so afraid I'd lost you. But it's going to be all right now. You'll see. I'll take you home, home with me and...and...everything will be okay then."

 

Andy had closed half the distance between him and Ally when the young woman shook her head and took a few steps back toward the edge of the abyss. As much as Ally wanted and needed Andy to hold her and to make everything better, she knew he couldn't. The same reasons that had taken her to the abyss before, pushed her ever closer again.

 

"No Andy, I can't go home with you and everything's NOT going to be okay. It's...it's never going to be OKAY, because.... because, I'M never going to be okay! Please Andy, please just leave and … and...just forget you ever knew me." Ally trembled and inched backward as the tears ran fresh rivulets down her face.

 

Andy stopped, but he didn't retreat. His heart ached as he could feel his soul mate's pain. She needed him now, more than ever. Extending his hand toward her, his voice was filled with love and a cool calm. "Ally, please listen to me. I can never forget you, and I'm not leaving without you. Now come to me my love. Just step toward me and take my hand. Please Ally, I love you."

 

Ally shook her head and wiped her eyes. Her voice choked with tears, "No! No! No! Andy you can't love me. No one can love me. Oh Andy look at me, for Goddess sake will you just LOOK AT ME!" Her trembling hands directed his eyes to her face and body and then fell to her side clenched in fists of frustration.

 

Andy did as his love requested. He looked at her and within her. Within, he saw the beautiful, gentle soul that had captured his heart and brought love into his life. He also felt the pain and frustration of the beating she had taken. Not just the physical beating that had left her face bruised and her gown torn and bloodied, but the emotional one, the one that was torturing her far worse. He was a mixture of compassion for Ally, rage at those who had hurt her so, and guilt from not having been there to protect her.

His emotions poured out in a torrent, "Ally I AM looking at you. I can't STOP looking at you and I don't want to. You're the most beautiful woman I have ever known and I want to spend the rest of my life looking at you, being with you, loving you. Ally you've made me happier than I ever dreamed possible, and when you were on my arm at that party I felt so proud and so lucky because the most beautiful girl there was with me. You turned heads all afternoon, and not because of what you're thinking, but because they saw a beautiful girl in a lovely gown. My parents, Ally, they adored you. Everything, everything was going so wonderful and...and then I left you. I said I wouldn't leave you and then I did. None of this would have happened if I had just stayed with you. I promised you I wouldn't leave you and then I did. … I … I … I let them hurt you Ally. It's all my fault, all my fault."

Ally looked up to see that her soul mate's pain matched her own as he shook his head, chastising himself for having failed her, or so he thought. Guilt, frustration and anger was threatening to consume him, just as it was her. She could not, would not let her beloved Andy think that what she was, or what had happened could possibly be his fault.

Her voice was the calmest it had been since she'd saw him again, "Andy my love, you did make me happy, happier than I have ever dreamed possible, and I …, I felt like the luckiest girl there because I had the most handsome man's arm holding mine, and your parents are sweet. But Andy! … It's not real, I'm not real. It's just been a beautiful fairy tale but sooner or later it has to end. And … and … what happened after you left is not your fault! Maybe … maybe it was actually a godsend."

Andy shook his head and his eyes grew wide in disbelief, "A godsend? Ally how can you say that? You can't be thinking straight. Look, I don't know everything that happened, but I've seen and heard enough to know they hurt you and I let it happen. They beat your body and they tried to crush your spirit, but I'm not going to let them take you from me. I'm going to take you back to my parent's place or Elsa's and then I'll stay with you until you're well. And then … then I'll go find those bastards that did this. It was Tom Collins and that lot he runs with wasn't it? They were seen scurrying off like rats after I'd heard you'd been hurt. So help me Ally, I'll track them down and I swear they'll pay for what they've done to you. God as my witness, they'll pay!"

Ally shook her head and pleaded with Andy, "Andy no! If you let your anger and hate rule you, you'll be no better. Please Andy don't go after them. Even if you do 'make them pay', it won't do any good. The world is full of Tom Collins's. Are you going to fight them all? Andy, I am hurt, but I've been beaten far worse than this, and by my own father's hand. It's not the bruises, or the anger I feel over getting them that truly pains me. Those things will heal. They always do. It's the hurt that WON'T heal that I can't live with. Its knowing that no matter how much I love you, or you love me, that I'll never be the real woman you deserve. Andy, I can't change what I am. Goddess knows I wish I could, but I can't. That's reality, Andy. You can't change the world or the Tom Collins's who live in it, and you can't keep me safe from either. Andy, it's just no good. Tom was right, at least right about one thing. I'll always be a 'girly-boy' in a frock and sooner or later you'll realize that and then. … Then you'll hate me and I … I … just can't live with that Andy!. I can't!"

Andy's anger and thirst for revenge drained quickly as his love for Ally and his fear of losing her chased it away. He knew if he lost her now, he'd lose her forever. His words had to be true and they had to reach her. He'd failed her once today. He would not fail her again. "Ally I could never hate you, NEVER! How could I hate the woman who showed me the meaning of love? Yes, Ally the WOMAN! You tell me that you're not woman enough for me, well … I think you're more woman than any I have ever met and you're all that I could ever want. Ally! … Tom Collins wasn't right! People like him and your father have been wrong to you all your life. You didn't listen to them before. Please don't listen to them now. For Goddess sake, Ally! Listen to ME! … I believe in YOU and I believe in us! I love you, and I tell you this from the heart! You are the woman of my dreams!"

Ally laughed bitterly, "The woman of your dreams? Andy I'm not the WOMAN of anyone's dreams. When are you going to open your eyes and see the real me? When are you going to realize I'm not Cinderella?"

Andy eased a step closer and took the opening she'd left him. "No Ally, I know you're not Cinderella and I know that you're not a genetic girl. You're Ally. You're my soul mate and I love you and that's what matters. To me you're the most beautiful woman in the world."

Ally shook her head unable to accept his praise, "Andy you think I'm beautiful now, but I'm going get old, and one day this beauty you see is going to be gone. You're going to wake up one morning and find yourself sleeping next to a forty year old, fat balding man and you're going to hate me for ruining your life."

Andy sighed heavily, "And someday I'll be a forty year old fat balding man. Are you going to hate me and say I ruined your life?"

Ally quickly shot back, "That's different Andy, and you bloody well know it!"

Andy then tried to soothe the feathers he'd just ruffled, "Ally, my love, I know its different for you. Goddess as my witness I know it. For your sake, Ally, I wish you had the body that you feel would complete you, but to me you are already a beautiful woman and in my eyes you always will be."

Ally wiped away the tears, but couldn't wipe away the pain or the truth, "Andy, you're in love with someone who doesn't exist. You're in love with the actress in the play. You're in love with the fairy tale princess you took to the party, but they're not real, Andy. I'm not the beautiful woman you think you see, and in time you'll find that out."

Andy ran his fingers through his blonde locks and silently prayed for the Goddess to finally give him words to reach his love, "Ally, you still don't get it, do you? When I say you're the most beautiful woman in the world, I don't just mean the physical beauty that fades with age like a rose. Yes, yes you have that kind of beauty, and yes, I was smitten with the actress whose golden voice and performance stole the show that night. By the time they closed the curtains, I just had to meet you. I would of paid a thousand pounds that night for the honor of giving you that rose, and when I stood before you, I knew I was standing in front of the most beautiful woman in the world and when I kissed you I nearly lost myself in it. Yes, I wanted you and I needed you from the first moment we met, but it wasn't until after that kiss, and after the show that I saw the beautiful woman who captured my heart. Ally, it was when all the costumes, and scripts and audience were gone, and there was only you and I walking the streets of London, talking and cuddling until the early morning chased the night away, that I fell in love with you. During the time we've been together you shared you pain, your joy, your hopes, your dreams, and your very soul with me, and I want you to keep on sharing those things with me forever. Ally, I'm not lost in a stage illusion. You are the actress and you are the fairy tale princess. But you are also a woman, in the very depths of your soul you are a woman, as real as any other, and THAT'S the woman I love. When I say you are the most beautiful woman in the world, that's the beauty I speak of and that beauty is like my love for you Ally, it's eternal."

Ally's resolve, like the ground surrounding the abyss, was beginning to crumble. Andy's words were beginning to work their magic. It was so tempting to get lost in his arms and that magic, but she couldn't surrender. She had to be strong. She had to be strong for Andy's sake.

"But Andy, even if you accept me as I am … your friends … your family … the rest of the world may never accept me or our love. I … I … could cost you everything."

Andy's blue eyes were the deepest blue Ally had ever seen, and they spoke to her even before he did, "Ally, I DON'T CARE what the rest of the world accepts. I love my parents … but if they can't accept you … if they can't accept us … then they can go to blazes along with their money, my friends AND the rest of the world. See Ally, I've had all those things, but they didn't complete me. They didn't give me the kind of love or joy that completes a man. Only his soul mate can do that, and I know you're my soul mate. It's … its so amazing! Before I met you, I didn't even know I was incomplete, but now I know I can never be whole without you. My love, you don't cost me everything, you ARE everything!"

Ally couldn't think. She could barely stand. She didn't know what to do any more. Andy just wouldn't let her go and it was getting harder every minute to want him to. Still, she had to fight, "Andy you are my soul mate. I know it, but...but...there is so much I want to give you, so much I need to give you and...and..so much I can't. I want to marry you Andy. I don't care if it's a big church wedding, but I want your ring on my finger and I want to be your wife. I want to give my body to you, Andy, and make love to you as a woman. I want our bodies to join like our souls have joined. I want those joinings to some day create life within me, and I want to bring that life into this world. I want us to provide a safe and loving home for our children where they can learn and grow. I want see them find their soul mates, and I want to spoil my grandchildren rotten. I want to make love to you until our bones are too brittle to risk contact."

Ally's pleas nearly brought the big man to his knees. He too wanted to share these things with her, but sadly, he knew most would probably never be. Aside from his undying love and hope for the future, he had little else he could promise her. Carefully, he eased a step closer, now only a few feet from his love. He could grab her, but she had to come to him freely or not at all. He knew it was now or never, so he offered all that he had and prayed it would be enough.

"Ally I want to share all of those things with you. I want to see you walking down that aisle and know you are coming to stand by me. I want to love you in every way a man can love a woman. I want to hold our children in my arms and watch them grow and I want you beside me till my dying day. My love, I don't know how much of all that is possible, but I want you and me to spend the rest of our lives trying to find out. Perhaps we'll just have to trust in ourselves, and the Goddess. We'll do everything we can to build the life we both want. We'll rise each morning and thank the Goddess for all that we have, and we'll go to bed each night and pray for the strength to face the next day without the things we can't have. Ally, I promised you I would never leave you, but I didn't keep that promise. Well, I'm here now and I'll never break that promise again. I need you, I love you and I want you to come back with me, but if after all I have said, you still choose death over life, then I choose death too, because death with you is better than life without you."

The handsome prince and his undeniable love for his princess had slain all the dragons or at had least stolen their fire. What more could Ally ask? This man not only was willing to share life with her, but death as well. How could she ever doubt his love now? He loved her every bit as much as she loved him, and he loved all of her, even the parts she could never love. Maybe she wasn't all the woman she wanted to be, but she was enough woman for Andy and maybe that would be enough. She no longer feared he would grow to hate her for what she could never be or never give him. She knew in her heart, that together they would become more than either could have ever been alone, and by the grace of the Goddess she knew it would be enough. She knew that someday Andy and she would meet in death, but that day wasn't today, and she prayed it wouldn't be for a long, long time. Most of all she knew she needed to feel his strong arms around her, and without a word she flung herself into them.

Andy pulled her in tightly and held her close as both their tears came in a release. Andy gently rocked her, stroking her back as she nuzzled against him. No words save for Andy cooing in Ally's ear were spoken. They didn't need them. They just needed each other.

Andy eventually carried Ally over to the tree and sat down, placing her in his lap. He brushed back her bangs and offered his lips. She took them readily as they held the kiss and each other. Reluctantly they pulled apart and Ally laid her head against Andy's chest. She nuzzled, warm and cozy in his embrace.

She was so exhausted that she had almost drifted off had it not been for Andy's soft voice in her ear, "Ally, when I came up on you. I...I didn't know if you were dead or alive. I saw you sitting beneath this tree, the blood on your dress, and your eyes closed. I prayed you were only sleeping. Thank Goddess you were."

Ally started to tell him she wasn't sleeping, only playing a little wish game with her friend Alice. "Alice!", she thought. In all that had happened she'd forgotten about the talkative child who'd almost tumbled to her death with her. She lifted her head off Andy's chest, and began looking around but saw no sign of her.

Andy watched as Ally got to her feet and continued to look towards the woods he'd came from, "Ally, what are you looking for? You lose something?"

Ally put her hands on her hips and continued to scan the area. "Umm...not something, someone. A little blonde-haired girl, ohhh....bout so high." She then waved a hand at about Alice's height. "Blue pinafore, white stockings, Mary Jane's. Her name was Alice or at least that's what she said, but I had a feeling that was all part of the game she was playing."

Andy raised his eyebrow at Ally, "Game she was playing?"

Ally shook her head and laughed, "Never mind about that, but are you sure you didn't see her Andy? I mean she was right here with me and she couldn't of gone off into the woods that fast. She'd must of gone back down the path."

Andy shook his head and smiled, "Ally, trust me, I think I would have seen a little blonde-haired girl pass me on the path. I was pretty out of it, but not that far."

Ally sighed, "I guess she must have went back to her mummy. I wish I'd gotten a chance to meet the woman. Andy, her daughter saved my life. If Alice hadn't came when she did, I wouldn't have been here when you got here."

Andy eyes drifted toward the abyss that almost swallowed his love not once, but apparently, twice, "I wish I would have met her to thank her. She sounds like a special little girl."

Ally smiled, "Yes, she was. Gosh, what an imagination."

Andy slipped in behind Ally and gently kissed her neck, "Ally I've got one question. How on earth did you get all the way out here? We've got to be twenty miles from the estate. Did you catch a ride from someone on the road?"

Ally turned and stared at Andy wide-eyed, "Twenty miles? That...that can't be. I mean I couldn't have … I mean I knew I ran a long way through the woods, and … and when I came out on the road I thought it was so strange that I'd come this far, but...but …"

Andy shook his head, "Ally I know this area, if not this spot. We're at least twenty miles from the woods that border my parent's estate. Are you telling me that you walked or ran all the way here? There's no way. It's not possible."

Ally shrugged her shoulders, "I'm here aren't I? And for that matter, so are you?"

That thought made Ally think, and this time she turned the question back at Andy, "Andy, I'm so glad you found me, but...just how in the name of the Goddess did you do it? I never told you about this place, let alone how to get here."

Andy nodded, "Well, if you hadn't stopped and talked to that lady in fancy dress, I never would of found you."

Ally took a step back and gave Andy a puzzled stare, "Lady in fancy dress? What lady?"

Andy rolled his eyes getting just a big frustrated, "The lady dressed up like a playing card and giving out tarts on the roadside. You know, one of those promotional things for some new pastry, I guess. She's the one who told me where to find you. If you hadn't talked to her, I'd've kept right on walking. Of course if that weird cat hadn't been sitting in the middle of the road smiling at me, I'd be at Elsa's by now."

Ally shook her head and then waved her hands for Andy to stop, "Hold it, … hold it …. HOLD IT!. I think you'd better start from the beginning and don't leave anything out."

Andy offered Ally his arm and she smiled as she took it willingly. Directing her back to their spot at the tree, he sat down and pulled her onto his lap once more, "Okay, well, after I got done talking with Dad, I headed back out to the party to find you and get our dance. That's when Mom came up and said something had happened. One of the guests told her that she'd went to the ladies room and broke up some sort of scuffle between you and several of the servers. She said they shot out as soon as she came in and then when she tried to help you or go for help herself, you ran off before she could do either. Ummm … she said … she said there was blood, and … and she didn't know how badly you were hurt."

Andy wrapped his arms around Ally and held her tight. Finally getting a second breath, he started again. "Well, my parents and I searched the house and the grounds. I found one of your shoes at the edge of the property by the woods and then searched there for another twenty minutes until I found the other one at the foot of a big oak, but still no sign of you. I...I didn't know what to do. I went back to the house, got my car and decided to drive up the road. I thought maybe I'd find you walking along the way. If I didn't find you there, I was going to Elsa's. If she hadn't seen or heard from you, I was going to call the police."

Ally nodded knowingly. If things hadn't turned out as they did, the police definitely would have been involved. She gave her love a soft kiss and smile to let him know everything was all right now, and he started once again. "Well, I had been driving a couple of minutes when ummm...well things kinda got weird."

"Weird?" Ally asked curiously.

Andy rolled his eyes and then fidgeted a bit, "Ummm … well…,this cat was sitting in the middle of the road, a big fat, orange-stripped one. I slowed a bit and honked but he just sat there, and I guess that's really the point where things kinda got weird."

Ally smiled, "Go on then."

"It...it had to be the sunlight or something. I mean I couldn't have really seen what I thought I saw."

"Andy, c'mon give!" Ally pushed.

Andy finally relented, "Well, I was coming up on the cat pretty fast and then all of a sudden, it … ummm … almost disappeared."

Ally laughed, "How do you … almost …' disappear?"

Andy lowered his head and his voice, "Well, the cats body disappeared, but its smile was still sitting there and then then that finally disappeared too."

Ally's eyes grew wide and she started to speak, but Andy cut her off, "Look, look I know what you're thinking. You think I've gone round the bend or something, but I swear, Ally, there was nothing of that cat left but a big toothy smile."

Ally giggled, "No Andy, as strange as it seems, I do believe you. Honestly I do, but what happened after that?"

Andy sighed, "Well, the whole cat thing sort of rattled me a bit, and I kinda swerved to the side of the road. I pulled off onto the shoulder and just sat there a minute. I mean it's not like you see that sort of thing everyday. I decided to just chalk it up to stress, sunlight, or the champagne I'd sneaked a glass of at the party. I figured I'd better get going toward Elsa's, so I fired up the engine, but now she wouldn't start. I tinkered with it for a few minutes and didn't have any luck. You know me Ally, all I know how to do is drive 'em."

Ally smiled and nodded as Andy continued, "So, I started walking, thought maybe I'd find you, or at least get a lift. I'd been walking for about ten minutes and hadn't had a single car pass. I remember thinking that was rather odd, as this road is usually well traveled. Around then is when I realized that somehow I'd gotten off the main road. I didn't know how I'd done it, but I was on a side road and by the looks of it, I'd gone quite a distance. Well, that's when I met the lady in fancy dress."

Ally grinned, "Yes, you mentioned her. You said she told you where I'd gone?"

Andy nodded, "Yes … called me by name and told me that you'd gone off down the path to the abyss. When we get back out I hope she's still there. I'd like to thank her properly."

Ally smiled like the fat orange cat her love had seen earlier, "Yes Andy, I'd like to meet her, too."

Andy gave his love a queer smile, "Meet her? You already met her, and thank Goddess you did and told her some about it. Like I said, if you hadn't, I'd probably still be walking."

Ally shook her head, "Andy there was no one on the road when I walked it. I never saw a single car, not a single person, especially a woman in fancy dress giving away tarts."

Andy ran his fingers through his hair and blew out a frustrated sigh, "Ally you have to have talked to her. I'm not making this whole thing up."

Ally reached out and took his hand, "I believe you Andy, I do. Why don't you just tell me what she said."

Andy nodded and started again, "Well it's like I said before. I realized that somehow I'd gotten off the main road and that's when I saw her."

"The lady in fancy dress," interrupted Ally.

Andy nodded and continued. She was standing at a booth all dolled up like a life size playing card. She was the Queen, the Queen of Hearts. She even had the crown to go with it. As I got closer I could see she had all these pastries sitting on the counter, and that's when I read the sign."

"The sign?" Ally asked.

Andy nodded again, "Yeah, it said, 'The Queen of Heart's Cherry Tart's'. I figured it was some new product they were pushing and this was one of those free give-aways they are always doing. You know, publicity and all. Well, I was going to stop and ask her if she might be able to tell me how to get back to main road, and that's when she waved me over and called me by name. I jogged over and that's when she pointed out the path to the abyss and told me that you'd gone down there a short while ago and were pretty upset. She said I'd better hurry. I didn't even really thank her. I just ran across the road and down the path. A few minutes later, I was here. See! You HAD to have spoken to her."

Ally shook her head, "Andy, I was pretty upset, but I'd remember if I'd spoken to someone, especially the Queen of Hearts." Ally paused for a moment and then a slight smile teased at her lips, "Andy, even if I did speak to her, and I know I didn't, how would she know who you are, and that you were looking for me? Even IF I'd mentioned your name, how would she know YOU were Andy … My Andy?"

Andy shrugged his shoulders and turned it all back on Ally, "Well it's not much stranger than your little friend that appeared out of nowhere and then disappeared again. Alice wasn't it?"

Ally nodded and then her eyes went wide, "Of course! That's it! She told me she was playing fairy tales. Alice, she was playing Alice in Wonderland! It all makes sense now."

Andy rose to his feet and rubbed his chin, "I'm glad you understand … now how about enlightening me?"

Ally shook her head and laughed, "This whole thing is right of out Alice in Wonderland. Think about it, Andy. I saw the blonde-haired little girl in the blue pinafore and she called the abyss the "rabbit's hole". And you … you saw the Cheshire cat who disappeared leaving the grin, and … and … of course the Queen of Hearts and her cherry tarts … that was from the fairy tale too."

She paused and then giggled, "I'm glad she didn't say off with your head."

Andy chuckled, "You expect me to believe this whole thing is part of some elaborate real life fairy tale?"

Ally shrugged her shoulders, "You got a better idea?"

Andy shook his head, "No, I guess I don't. But you know, Ally, if we tell anyone about this, they'll never believe it. They'll probably cart us off to the loony bin."

Ally smiled impishly, "Sounds like the perfect place to me. After meeting the cast of Alice and Wonderland, we might as well go there. Maybe we'll meet Snow White, Peter Pan and Glenda the Good Witch."

Andy rolled his eyes and laughed, "Alright my little 'Ally in Wonderland,' lets get the heck out of here before we see a giant white rabbit with a pocket watch saying he's late."

Ally giggled and took Andy's hand. She had taken but a few steps when she winced and bent down to grab at her ankle, "Owww, damn I must have turned it."

Andy smiled gallantly, "No problem fair lady, your carriage awaits," and then swept the young woman off her feet and into his arms. "I'll have you back at my parent's place before you can say, 'Mad Hatter'."

Ally wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him lightly. She laid her head on his shoulder and thought about what awaited them when they returned, "Andy, I can only imagine what your parents think."

Andy smiled, "You needn't worry about my parents. I did what I should have done from the start. I told them all about you. And … before you go bonkers on me, relax. They don't have a problem with you or us. Dad said he had a friend that sounds very much like you, he had surgeries and now is a legal she. Dad said she seemed quite happy last time he'd talked to her. Ally, my parents even offered to help pay for surgeries and stuff if you want them."

Andy paused a moment to chastise himself, "You know, if I'd been thinking straight, I would've realized my parent's wouldn't be that shocked. I mean, Hell, they lived in San Francisco for years. That's one of the most liberal cities in the states."

Ally was relieved they knew, and touched by their acceptance and their kind offer of help, but she was still nervous. "I dunno Andy. Maybe you should just take me back to Elsa's."

Andy waved her off, "What, and get me in Dutch with my mother? She's still waiting to show you the grounds and the house, and besides … you still owe me a dance."

Ally blushed and giggled, "I rather doubt if the band is still there and I don't think I'm in much shape to dance."

Andy winked, "I don't think we need music and I wouldn't worry much about that ankle of yours. I don't intend to let you out of my arms for quite some time." Ally sighed lovingly, kissed her prince and then laid her head back on his shoulder. Andy returned her kiss and then, with his princess snuggled safely in his arms, started up the path. Stopping for a moment he drew Ally's attention one last time.

"Oh, I almost forgot, I've got a message for you. That blonde-haired girl you were chatting with at the party, Diana I think. She gave me her number. Wanted me or my parents to call her when you were found. I think she's really taken with you."

Ally smiled warmly. In the few minutes they'd spoken, she'd gotten such a good feeling from the girl. Promising solemnly she'd give her a ring when they got back, Ally returned her head to Andy's shoulder and closed her eyes. Andy tasted Ally's lips one more time, and then with Ally firmly snuggled against him, he carried her up the path which lead to the road and to their shared destinies that lay beyond.

No sooner than the pair had passed out of view of the abyss, than another pair suddenly appeared at the base of the giant oak. Andy's Queen of Hearts, and Ally's little Alice stood hand in hand smiling at each other.

The happy child looked at the queen with love and excitement in her eyes, "Mummy I had eber so much fun goin to works wiff you and payin faiwy tales today."

The queen looked at her little princess with a mother's love and pride, "I can tell. Mummy was pretty sure her little girl would like this and besides, you're getting to be a big girl and it's time you know what Mummy does, because some day you'll be doing the same thing."

The little girl smile grew even bigger as she nodded, her mind drifting to the day when she would have the same magic powers as her mummy.

She sighed dreamily and then looked back up to her mother, who was tugging at the neck of her Queen of Heart's costume and frowning, "Mummy don't you no wikes your faiwy tale costume? Don't it fits wights?"

The queen sighed, "Well lets put it this way little one, there are some parts on a mummy's body that definitely are not meant to be squeezed flat between two playing cards. I'm sorry, Honey but Mummy's got to change."

With a wave of the woman's hand the Queen of Heart's costume vanished and was replaced by a long flowing soft white robe. Her hair, which had been neatly tucked beneath the crown, now fell to its full length just below her waist. The dark auburn had been washed away to reveal the mane's true colors. Shades of brown, black, blonde, and red flowed over her shoulders and sparkled in the sunlight.

The young woman ran her free hand through her hair and sighed with relief, "Finally, I can breathe again!"

Looking down at her daughter she winked and raised her hand again to wave it, "Now enough Alice in Wonderland for today. I want my little Maggie the Kitten back!"

The young mother started to wiggle her fingers but her daughter passionately begged her to stop, "Mummy wait, wait! Can I keeps da Alice dwess on peas, purdy peas. I wikes it bedders dan wobes."

The young woman smiled, "Okay, for a little while longer, but I want my baby back!"

Without chance for further protest, she unleashed her magic and the little blonde haired blue-eyed eight year old was replaced by the familiar form of a little girl with soft auburn curls, freckles and emerald green eyes. A few years had also melted away, and the small child that held her mummy's hand couldn't be much older than four or five. The blue dress was still there and with a second wiggle of fingers, shrunk to fit the child as well as it had before.

Maggie looked down at her dress and smiled happily, "Tanks you Mummy. I loves you!"

The lovely robe clad lass smiled and scooped up the little one in her arms, "You're welcome, Kitten and Mummy loves you too."

Maggie laid her head on her mother's shoulder and sighed.

The experienced mother knew the sound of that sigh all too well, "Okay Kitten, what's wrong? Something's bothering you. Why don't you tell Mummy all about it." The young mother sat down at the base of the popular old oak and placed Maggie in her lap.

The Kitten fidgeted for a minute and then started sheepishly, "Mummy I no tinks I did berry goods helpin Ally. I was spossed to keeps her fwom jumpin downs da wabbit hole and I almost kinda maded us boff falls in."

The little girl took a deep breath and then looked up wide-eyed at her mother, "Mummy, if Ally hadn't gwabbed da twee bwanch would we weally felled all da way downs da wabbit hole?"

The young woman stared out toward the abyss, thinking for a moment, before carefully choosing her words, "Kitten, you know mummy is always watching. I would never have let you really fall down the rabbit hole."

Maggie nodded and hugged her mother who instinctively pulled her in tight. She had told her daughter the truth. Maggie never would have fallen to her death in the abyss, but what she neglected to tell her daughter was that Ally was a mortal being and a creature of free will. When she grabbed Maggie, she truly risked her own life trying to save Maggie's. Had she fell into the abyss, Maggie's mother could not have intervened to save her.

The loving mother held her daughter tightly, glad she'd been able to answer her question with less than the whole truth, but she could still feel the child's unrest, "Okay MaggPie, what else is bothering my little kitten?"

Maggie sighed, "Mummy how comes we didn't gets to use no big magics to fixes eberyting? All I gots to do was talk to Ally lots and...and all you dids was make faiwy tales dat maded Andy comes here."

The young woman ran her fingers through her daughter's curly locks and kissed her forehead before starting again, "Maggie...sometimes when we help we don't always need to use big magic. You remember me telling you that these mortals live in a time and place where they don't have our kind of magic?"

The little girl nodded and then her mother continued, "Well I didn't say they have no magic at all. On the contrary, they have one special kind of magic, a very powerful magic that happens sometimes when two of these mortals find each other. It's called love."

Maggie smiled and hugged her mother, "You means wikes I love yous and yous loves me?"

The lovely lady smiled, "Yes, that's the one magic that is always and everywhere. Ally and Andy have that kind of magic, so they really didn't need us to help them very much. Ally just needed a friend to talk to her for a while and all Andy needed was a gentle push in the right direction. The power of their love did all the rest of the magic."

Maggie nodded and a slight smile turned at her lips, "Well, I guess I am bedder at talkin den I is magic spells wight nows."

The young mother giggled at her chatty Kitten and held her tight, "Patience little one, patience. You'll learn."

Maggie smiled impishly, "Mummy can I habs a tart?"

Her mother gave her a puzzled look, "A tart?"

The little girl nodded and grinned wide, "You knows Mummy one of dems chewwy tarts you haded when you was da Queen of Heart's. Dey wooked yummers."

"Well...you have been awfully good, but mind you only one, AND try to get more IN you than ON you this time. All right?"

Another wave of fingers found Maggie holding a plump cherry tart in her hands.

"Tanks mummy!" exclaimed the happy girl. "I'll twy be no messy. I always twy." Maggie bit in and savored the sweet. She swallowed the bite and once again drew her mother's attention,"Mummy I was tinkins bouts somefins."

The young witch waited quietly knowing she didn't need to prompt her daughter to find out what was on her mind aside from cherry tarts.

"Mummy, I was tinkins bouts dem mean ol' boys dat hurted Ally. Hers sures was lucky dat da lady comed in whens hers did or dey woulda hurted her weally bad huh mummy?"

The hazel-eyed beauty smiled impishly and then snapped her fingers. Immediately her true form changed to that of the woman who had so timely intervened when Ally's life was hanging in the balance. "I wouldn't exactly say it was luck", she added with a wink.

Maggie giggled and hugged the illusion her mother was wearing, relieved to know that her new friend Ally had been under her mother's watchful eye all along.

Sighing contently she smiled up at her mother who had changed back again to her favorite mortal form. "Mummy is Ally and Andy gonna bees all wight nows?

The young woman nodded, "Would you like to see?"

Maggie cherry tart smiled and nodded enthusiastically.

A wave of the magic user's hand caused a cloud to appear before them, and then as it cleared, images began to appear in the center of it. It was Ally and Andy, only ten years older and this time not alone. Two small children were playing with a puppy, while Ally sat cuddled next to Andy, both of them smiling at the pair. The strawberry-blonde haired little boy was rolling on the ground, squealing with delight as the puppy licked his face. His sister, who appeared to be just a bit older ran over to Andy and Ally with a smile as big as her brother's. "Mummy, Daddy I loves our puppy and so does Bubby toos." The pair pulled the little girl into their arms and were soon joined by puppy and boy.

Then the image faded from view and the mother smiled down at her daughter, "See Maggie? They're going to be fine, now."

Maggie nodded but then pulled on her mother's sleeve, "But mummy, I no unnersands. I toughted Ally could no habs babies. How dids her gets babies mummy?"

The young woman rolled her eyes, "Well...let's just say that's a fairy tale for another time, okay?"

Maggie answered, "Otay", and went back to munching her cherry tart. The young woman watched her daughter and then stared out to where the last remnants of the cloud were just fading away. With another wave of her hand another picture started taking form. It was a wedding, a huge wedding. Maggie smiled as she watched a tall and thin dark haired man in fancy dress slip a ring on the finger of a young and slender blonde haired beauty. The pair kissed and the music started once again.

Maggie looked up at her mother, "Mummy where is we now? Dat's not Ally and Andy."

Maggie's mother directed her daughter's attention to the second couple that preceded the bride and groom, "See Kitten, there they are. They're the maid of honor and the best man for one of the biggest, most beautiful weddings this world has ever known."

The pair watched as the bride smiled big and threw her bouquet to the crowd.

Maggie stared closely at her and sighed, "Mummy who is da purdy bonde haired lady cause I tinks I seened her for?"

The young mother smiled, "You have seen her. Remember the girl that Ally made friends with at the party?"

Maggie's green eyes grew wide and she smiled big, "I members now, dats Diana."

The lovely mother nodded, "That's right Kitten, and because Andy brought Ally back home, Ally and Diana got to be very good friends. Well, as you can see, Diana gets married and she gets to live every little girl's dream. She becomes a real princess because that man she is marrying is a prince."

Maggie stared closely at the tall dark haired man who was holding Diana's hand and frowned. "Mummy are you sure's hims a real faiwy tale pwince just wikes in my stowy books?"

The witch chuckled and rolled her eyes at her ever-questioning young daughter. "Yes Maggie, he's an honest to goodness prince. His name is Charles and he's the Prince of Wales. His mother is a very famous Queen. She is the Queen of England and HER grandmother was the REAL Queen of Hearts, so Alice in Wonderland was more than just a fairy tale!"

Maggie sat there mouth open and wide eyed, "Weally mummy?"

The young woman smiled and then wiggled her little ones nose, "Really!"

Maggie smiled as her mother then went on to explain that one day Charles and Diana would be king and queen and they would have two sons who would be fine young prince's. That made Maggie very happy and she grinned widely as she watched the royal newlyweds wave to the crowd.

The young witch ruffled her little one's unruly red locks and stole her attention away from the happy scene once again.

"I'll tell you something else Kitten, because of Ally and Diana's close friendship, Diana is deeply touched by Ally's pain, and inspired by her courage. So much so, Diana becomes a champion for many who suffer in this world, and she will be forever loved by not only England but the whole world, AND... none of that would of happened if we hadn't helped Ally and Andy get back together. So see? We did make a difference today and we barely even had to use magic."

Maggie smiled big, part from the happy story and part from the yummy cherry tart. "Mummy", she asked. "I onwy gots one ting dat I no wikes."

The momma witch was almost afraid to ask but ventured in to dangerous territory anyway, "Yes?"

"Mummy I still tinkins bouts dem mean ol boys dat hurted Ally. I fwaids dey will runs and chases her mores, or say bad words to hers or makes her cwys. I tinks you should turns dem into fwoggies mommy. Dat would fixes dem goods."

The little girl smiled big imagining three new frogs added to her cousin Cathleen's pond. Mother sighed, "Yes Kitten I suppose that would, but then they wouldn't learn anything now would they? No, I think I have a better idea than just punishing them. Something that will ease all your worries AND give these three mortals a second chance to learn."

Another wave of the hand, and another image came to life in the cloud. This time it was the front of a church, more aptly a convent. A large wicker basket sat at the steps, and three small infants wrapped in pink wobbie wiggled and squalled. Attached to the basket was a note that read, "Please give my babies love and a home."

Maggie giggled and squealed, "You turned dems into babies, baby girls! Yeah Mummy! You dids! You dids big magic after alls!"

The young woman laughed and ran her hand playfully through her daughter's curls.

"Yes, in this instance we needed big magic to make things right. See Kitten, it's going to be quite a while before these three are going to be walking, let alone running, and its gonna be just as long as before they're saying any words, bad or otherwise. I promise you they will never bother Ally again."

Maggie giggled as she watched the infants fuss, "And deys is doin all da cwyins now, huh Mummy?"

Mother nodded but then added an important point she wanted her daughter to understand, "Yes Kitten they are, but this isn't really about punishing them for being bad, it's about giving them a second chance, kind of like we did Ally and Andy. Hopefully this time around, as girls in a loving home, they'll grow and learn to love, because my darling Kitten, in their world as well as ours, the most important thing for any of us to do, is grow, learn and love. Okay?"

The young mother watcher her child nod and smile. She didn't know if Maggie truly understood yet, but she was learning, and growing and always loving.

Maggie smiled up at her mother, "Mummy next time I comes work wiff you can we pay faiwy tales gain? Next times I wanna bees da Liddle Mermaid!"

The young woman rolled her eyes and gave a tired smile, "We'll see." She knew that doing her work in a fairy tale setting, would keep the child's interest piqued and help her learn, but now it appeared she might be getting into deep water the next time, literally.

Maggie snuggled and a tiny yawn escaped her lips, "Mummy I wikes payin faiwy tales cause ebery times dey always gots happy endings."

Momma cradled her sleepy daughter and then sighed as she noticed how little cherry tart had found her daughter's mouth and how much had found dress, face, fingers and hair.

Shaking her head back and forth, "Well, Kitten looks like you're going to need a bath before bedtime."

Maggie pulled a face and pouted, "Well, I guess they don't ALWAYS gots happy endings after all."

The young mother giggled, kissed her child's forehead. Then in a final wave of her hand, the pair disappeared to meet their destiny, and for Maggie that was soap, water, and bed in that order.

The End

 

This story is part of the universes of "Kitten Tales" created by Maggie O'Malley and "The Evil Witch" created by shalimar.

  

  

  

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